Assertive Communication

Presented to Ma'am Manal

Presented by Irfan Hafeez Pakiza Mushtaq Maryam Bibi

What is Assertiveness?

Assertiveness is the ability to express yourself openly and honestly while also reflecting a genuine concern for others.

Because assertiveness is based on mutual respect, it's an effective and diplomatic communication style. Being assertive shows that you respect yourself because you're willing to stand up for your interests and express your thoughts and feelings. It also demonstrates that you're aware of the rights of others and are willing to work on resolving conflicts.

Why assertive communication makes sense

Communication style

When confronted with difficult situations, people can sometimes respond passively or aggressively

Passive person often feels inhibited, anxious, and allows others to downgrade their value.

If you may seem to be shy or overly easygoing. In essence, when you're too passive, you give others the license to disregard your wants and needs.

Assertive vs. passive behavior

Aggressive individuals express their rights but often on a wrong way by degradation or humiliation of others.

Aggressive behavior undercuts trust and mutual respect.

Assertive vs. aggressive behavior

Assertiveness falls in between these two responses.

Exploring questions

Open questions yield a lot of information because they allow a person to explain what is most important or interesting an encourage more elaboration.

Open Question

Probing questions are those that relate to the topic we want to explore further. They encourage the speaker to flash out the details.

Probing Question

Closed vs. Open

Closed When did that happen?

Was your trip successful?

Did you like the candidate?

Did you have a good meeting?

Open What led up to that?

What did you manage to accomplish on your trip?

In what ways do you think that candidate meets your needs?

What happened at the meeting?

Assertive communication takes practice. Flexibility: Match your style of communication

to the situation/person you are communicating with.

Skill, not personality: Communication styles are skills, not personality styles. You can leer to become more assertive.

Retreat, think, return: Take a break from the conversation. Relax/rethink and then try again.

Key Principles

Confidence: state facts, step up to the challenge

Clarity: easy to understand, clearly articulated

Control: monitor your emotions, stay composed, repeat the same message until understood (broken record).

Remember the 3C

6 assertive communication tips

Call a person by their name Use humor: it breaks down negative

emotions and will put tense situations at ease

Use appropriate words: “excuse me” “thank you” “I appreciate it”

1 Use polite words

Using “you” puts the other person on the defensive

Prefer "I": “I think...” “I noticed...” “I didn’t like...” “I am concerned about”.

#2 Begin your sentences with "I" instead of "you"

Don’t leave the other person in the dark Show program Present facts and data, not opinions and

interpretations Always get the facts right before you pass judgment Let the person know your goal or possible solution connect the two individuals who share the issue. e.g.: “I heard that John complained about Rick.” =>

“Have you checked with John about this? Has he talked to Rick about it.

3 Say what you want,

Don’t put the person down Focus on their behavior when

communicating Instead of ”You're too slow !” say “I don’t

think you are doing your share of the work.” Look at the in the person’s eyes

#4 Criticize the behavior, not the person

keep on track , if other topics are introduced. Repeat the

problem back this indicates that you want to solve the original problem first,

You can talk about other problems later, Stay focused on the issue – do not get

distracted, defensive, or start justifying yourself,

Get group validation.

5 Repeat the problem back, articulate the issues

For example: Who’s going to do what? Who takes the lead? When are they going to do it? Everyone needs a clear understanding: Answer: who, what, when, where, how much, how many Display strength and courage, and step up to the

challenge Own the results, the risks like the failure. Be honest

about it.

6 Make commitments where appropriate

Behaving assertively can help you:

Gain self-confidence and self-esteem Understand and recognize your feelings Earn respect from others Improve communication Create win-win situations Improve your decision-making skills Create honest relationships Gain more job satisfaction

benefits of being assertive