The Pulse - Vol. 8, Issue 5

Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative

FREE • NEWS, VIEWS, MUSIC, FILM, ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT • FEBRUARY 3, 2011 • VOLUME 8, ISSUE 5 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Story by Reginald Owens • Photography by Blake Hampton

The Powerof 100 Black Men

The Pulse | Vol. 8, Issue 5 | February 3, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com2

www.chattanoogapulse.com | February 3, 2011 | Vol. 8, Issue 5 | The Pulse 3

ContentsFEBRUARY

20113

PULSE BEATS 4SHRINK RAP 8 ON THE BEAT 21

LIFE IN THE NOOG 25ASK A MEXICAN 30

VOLUME 8, ISSUE 5 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

“The fact is, Hank was getting a bit older, was slowing down, and had some developing arthritis.”

— Chattanooga Zoo Executive Director Darde Long.

4

“The beauty of EDM is that it encompasses all forms of music, from Radiohead to Daft Punk

to Bassnectar to Black Eyed Peas.”— Dave Castaneda on the diversity of electronic dance music.

15

“It seems that any restaurant can serve meat that contains as little as 70 percent actual beef and still be in

good standing.”— Chuck Crowder on a recent fast-food lawsuit.

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“The members of the organization interact more like a large family than a group of unrelated volunteer workers.”

— Reginald Owens on the inner workings of 100 Black Men.

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President Jim Brewer, II

Publisher Zachary Cooper

Contributing Editor Janis Hashe

News Editor / Layout Design Gary Poole

Director of Sales Rhonda Rollins

Advertising Sales Rick Leavell, Michelle Pih, Townes Webb

Calendar Editors Bryanna Burns, Kat Dunn

Graphic Design Jennifer Grelier

Pulse ContributorsGustavo Arellano, Rob Brezsny

Dave Castaneda, Chuck Crowder Rick Pimental-Habib, Joshua Hurley

Blake Hampton, Phillip JohnstonMatt Jones, Sandra Kurtz

Kelly Lockhart, Reginald OwensErnie Paik, Star Roberts, Alex Teach

Editorial CartoonistRick Baldwin

Contact Info: Phone (423) 265-9494Fax (423) 266-2335

Email [email protected]

Calendar [email protected]

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The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on culture, the arts, entertainment and local news.

Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative

Pulse Beats

The Hidden Heart Of The Chattanooga Zoo

NEWS “No one wants to move to a less-than-desirable part of town.”

—Phil Grubb, president of the International Brotherhood of Police Officers Local 673, responding to Mayor Littlefield’s

plans to encourage officers to move back inside the city limits.

"Q"

“How are you doing?”It’s one of the most common greetings people

use, especially people who haven’t seen each other in a while. Most people answer with something along the lines of “fine” or “OK.” However, when you are the executive director of the Chattanooga Zoo, it’s a bit tougher question to answer right now.

Darde Long has had a very rough month. Between snowstorms, a rash of animal deaths, including that of zoo icon Hank the chimpanzee, and some less-than-flattering publicity, it would be understood if she was a little less chipper and upbeat than usual.

But you do not end up in her line of work without having a lot of resiliency and a huge amount of passion. Hank may have been the face of the zoo, but Long is the heart, and even when that heart wants to break, it continues to beat, and beat strongly.

Long is also not one to beat around the bush when it comes to questions about the zoo. In light of the deaths of 10 animals since the first of the year, ranging from the high-profile Hank to a pair of tortoises and a gecko, Long has been in the middle of a public relations nightmare that would have sent many other people in similar positions hiding behind lawyers or spokespeople.

Not Long.She has thrown open the doors of the zoo to

the media, has asked the Association of Zoos & Aquariums to investigate operations of the facility, and faces up to the issues directly. “We have had a number of deaths, and we are very concerned,” she said during a stroll through the zoo this past weekend. “We are looking at everything, exhausting all our resources, looking for answers.”

Answers that, in today’s world, in which people expect lab results back before the next commercial break, come a lot slower. “When an animal dies,

we do a necropsy to find out why,” Long explains. “Most of them we do here, especially if we know what’s wrong. But when an animal dies suddenly, we send them to UT in Knoxville, and it can take two to three weeks to get results back.”

Hank is a perfect example. There has been a lot of speculation and rumor spreading around town about his death at the age of 42. “The truth is, we don’t know exactly why Hank died so suddenly,” Long admits. “We know he had some heart problems with fluid around the heart, which is the main area we’re looking at. But while he was on oral medication for diabetes, he was not on insulin and we do know that was not a contributing factor in his death. The fact is, Hank was getting a bit older, was slowing down, and had some developing arthritis. But he was never found comatose. That is completely inaccurate.”

During Long’s tenure, she has overseen an expansion from an acre-and-a-half collection of a few animals in ’50s-style cement-and-iron-barred cages to a 15-acre site with natural habitats, an active breeding program for seven different species, and a coveted national accreditation with the Association of Zoos & Aquariums (AZA). Only about 10 percent of zoos in the country are accredited by AZA, and Chattanooga is one of the smallest zoos to ever meet their standards, about which Long is very proud.

“We weren’t due to be re-evaluated for another few years, but in light of what’s happened this past month, I asked them to come and investigate

as soon as they could get here, and they said they would,” Long says. “I’m proud of how the zoo operates, but it’s always welcome to have an independent set of eyes to look around and see if there’s anything we can do differently or better.”

And while Long is obviously still in mourning over the loss of Hank, with whom she had formed a deep bond over the years, as well as the loss of the other animals, she quickly becomes animated and joyful when talking about some of the new additions to the zoo. Chief among those is the new snow leopard cub. The cub, the only one of three born to mother Kasmir to survive, is growing quickly and should be large enough to go on public display by the end of February. Sadly, only around 40 percent of snow leopards born in captivity survive the first week. “We did everything we could,” Long explains. “But only one made it.”

Touring the site, talking with staffers and volunteers, seeing their passion and work ethic and obvious love for the animals, it’s clear that “we do everything we can” should be the mantra for the zoo. And even more importantly for the animals under their care is that Long is willing to do whatever is necessary to find out if anything else needs to be done. Photography by Star Roberts.


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CommentaryNEWS

Local Wrestling EntertainmentI have a friend who wrestles

professionally, plus I have been a fan of pro wrestling since I was a kid. Are the matches staged? Usually, and certain parts are choreographed, but much of it is ad lib, although some matches may be a “shoot” where there is no prearranged winner. Is it real? Certainly—the wrestlers are trained in how to fall, how to “sell” the effects of their opponent’s moves, and how to hit, throw, and hold their opponent with no real damage other than the bruises that come with the territory, but, forcefully applied, these moves are real. Unfortunately something sometimes goes wrong and someone does get really hurt by accident. As one retired wrestler once said, “Sometimes it gets real real real fast.” It’s a show. Enjoy it for what it is. I do. Charlie Williams

Water Rate Hike Wars The free market solution for water prices is to let anyone who wants to compete with Tennessee-American. TAWC is a monopoly created by law, so change the law. Let the city declare that anyone who wants to unhook from TAWC and do water

some other way may do so (and change the ethos, not just the regulation). Change might start at the fringes. When Mayor Kinsey sprang his water-takeover proposal on us, I recall some local water district had prices half as high as the rest. Neighbors of the cheap district might like to switch over. Companies along the river might run their own pipes. Might sell surplus. Prices convey information. When the government meddles with prices, it conveys lies. Andrew Lohr

Missing HankFour generations in my family enjoyed

Hank. Me as a child, my parents, then my children and grandchildren. He knew my face, always wanting chewing gum (prohibited) but shared a couple times. He would sit and listen to me talk, then give a big nod in agreement. I live in Louisiana now, but I still remember the zoo name of Zooville. I’m 48 and never too old to mourn

the loss of a family friend. Rest in peace Hank, you will be truly missed. I hope he will be given a wonderful funeral, and possibly a plaque or something. Pamela Browning

Public Art InitiativePublic Art Chattanooga is pleased to

announce Art in Motion, a new public art initiative that will transform CARTA electric shuttles into original, mobile public art works. PAC is seeking proposals for original, two-dimensional designs that will be wrapped on CARTA’s downtown electric shuttles. Five designs will be selected to be featured on five buses for the duration of two years beginning in the spring. This competition is open to all visual and graphic artists and artist teams over the age of 18, who currently reside, work, or attend a university within 50 miles of Chattanooga. The selected artists/designers will receive a $2,000 honorarium for their design. Deadline for submissions is March 9 at 4 p.m. For more information and a complete application form, visit www.publicartchattanooga.com Peggy Townsend Director, Public Art Chattanooga


A weekly roundup of the newsworthy, notable and often head-scratching stories gleaned from police reports from the Chattanooga Police Department, the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Office,

the Bradley County Sheriff’s Department and the Dalton Police Department.

Here is one of the agenda items to be discussed at the Tuesday, February 8 meeting

of the Chattanooga City Council.

The Chattanooga City Council meets each Tuesday at 6 p.m. in the City Council Building at 1000 Lindsay St. For more information on the current agenda, and past minutes, visit www.Chattanooga.gov/City_Council

Politics & CrimeNEWS

7. Resolutions:

d) A resolution authorizing the Director of the Office of Sustainability Outreach Coordinator to contract with HDR, Inc., in an amount not to exceed $88,000.00, to review energy and utility use in the City of Chattanooga buildings; to outline goals and initiatives for reducing energy and util-ity use within Chattanooga Operations; to produce an energy/utility policy, proce-dure, and uniform forms for local contrac-tors to collect data to be used in compara-tive analysis; to draft a City sustainability policy for preliminary analysis of existing building inventory and recommendations; and for analysis of an alternative energy/water conservations project for financing and delivery methods.

It’s always nice to see local governments not only looking at ways to save taxpayer money, but also creating ways to improve energy usage and using forward thinking.

• No one is above the law, especially those in public office. As was discovered by Bradley County Commissioner Howard Thompson, who finds himself on the wrong side of the law. Back on December 2, the Bradley County Sheriff’s Office was contacted by agents of the 10th Judicial District Drug Task Force with in-formation they received during a routine traffic stop. An informant told them that he intended to sell stolen property to Thompson, the own-er of a local flea market. On December 22, search warrants were executed at Thompson’s business and home. Then last week, detectives presented the results of their investigation to the Bradley County Grand Jury, resulting in an indictment charging Thompson with attempted theft over $1,000 and false report. Thompson cooperated with investigators and surrendered at the Bradley County Jail. After processing in the booking office, he was released on his own recognizance.

• They almost got away with it...the soda machine, that is. McMinn County deputies noticed a box truck backed up to a discount store on Highway 39. When the men in the truck saw the deputies, they took off...and out of the back of the truck, a soda machine fell out. Police gave chase and followed the truck

down County Road 574. That’s where the pair got out and hoofed it into the woods. Detectives are still trying to identify the at-tempted soda thieves, and would appreciate any assistance from residents who know who the carbonated culprits might be.

• There’s nothing funny about funny mon-ey, especially when it lands you behind bars. Last week, East Ridge Police were dispatched to a Ringgold Road fast-food restaurant in reference to an individual attempting to pass a counterfeit bill. The suspect fled the scene prior to officers’ arrival, but a description of his vehicle led to their locating the suspect's vehicle in the parking lot near the Rave The-ater. The suspect was observed entering a store and was detained without incident. During the course of the investigation, it was learned that the suspect passed or attempt-ed to pass three counterfeit $10 bills at three separate locations. He was also in possession of two additional counterfeit $10 bills. He ended up being charged with three counts of “crimi-nal simulation”, which is the legal definition of passing fake money.

• What happens when you break into a bus and the bus driver is still there? Well, one would-be burglar found out the hard way. Last week, an alert neighbor noticed a young man breaking into a home on Appaloosa Way. Hamilton County deputies responded to the address but not before the suspect had fled the area.

However, a short time later a call was received that a school bus driver caught someone breaking into his bus and that he was attempting to detain the suspect. Deputies went to the location and found that this subject fit the suspect description from the earlier burglary. As a result, the 19 year old is now facing charges of aggravated burglary, vandalism and burglary of an auto, as well as being in possession of other property suspected to be stolen.


Recently I attended my first drumming circle. It was hosted by CHEO (Complementary Health Education Organization) and it was quite an enlightening experience. I’d always wondered about drumming: How it actually happens, who participates, what’s the point, does it always take place around a bonfire in a remote field when pagans aren’t using it, does a full moon factor in, and what about earplugs? Like most things in life, once you experience something it becomes demystified and sometimes, as in this case, quite wonderful.

Not everyone used drums (I used a noisy can of beans, then some clacky things on a rope.) But I found the drumming (and noise-making) to be both exciting and meditative, and I imagine each of the 20 or 30 folks participating had their own highly personal experience. It was “led” (meaning, “started”; but there are no rules, structure or guidance, other than to “go with it”) by a handful of drummers who are experienced, learned folks, and within moments after the creative cacophony began, my eyes closed and I could feel waves of sensation wash over me and was definitely drawn into—and was part of—the ever-changing pulse. And it was fun! Afterward I felt calm, centered, and connected with all the others in the circle, even though I don’t think I exchanged a single word during the course of the ritual.

The possibilities of healing and wellness can take limitless forms, and can enter and enrich your life from directions you may never have considered, if you’re open to it. I wasn’t depressed when I entered the drumming circle, but afterward I noticed my mood was considerably elevated. Now that I’ve had this experience, I think if I

were depressed, one thing I might try is drumming on something—a pot, an upside-down bucket, a can of pennies—and just see what happens. If it keeps me from having to oversleep or devour an entire cheesecake, into the Big Bag O’ Tools it goes!

I also recently experienced a Qi Gong session (pronounced “Chee Gong”; an overall term for various forms of Chinese physical and mental healing and complementary medicine, recognized by the National Institutes of

Health) with a wonderful intuitive healer here in town. I plan on going again and dragging along a couple of friends who have their own healing needs.

At my wellness center, Well Nest (www.WellNestChattanooga.com), we explore wellness through yoga, meditation, massage, nutrition, t’ai ji, and diverse healing workshops. What works for one person may be different for another, so being open to a range of holistic options only makes sense.

I suppose I come by my curiosity for holistic healthcare honestly. I’ve heard it said in my family that my grandmother—one of the wisest and most evolved people I’ve ever known, despite her limited education—was quite a homeopath herself, and solicited the help of natural healers when raising her own children. Now, am I suggesting that you avoid Western medicine? Of course not. I see a physician who’s a big help to me and I have every intention of keeping her around. But I also intend to continue to explore non-invasive, natural, and complementary ways of staying well at every opportunity. I want to be aware

of everything available to me, so I can make the most intelligent, informed decisions when it comes to my well-being. Hey, I’m not getting any younger. Some of these aches and pains are speaking (creaking) pretty loudly!

I’ll close by sharing one other tidbit with you. There’s a new puppy in our household. Miss Betty Lou, my 8-year-old wonderpup who most of you know through this column, and I are adjusting as best we can to the new pup, Lucy Lou, in what was once a fairly calm home. Lucy’s a romping, endless bundle of rapidly growing energy. Remember excitable, bouncing “Tigger” from the Winnie-the-Pooh stories? Picture a black, floppy-eared, 30-pound Tigger...on crack. I don’t recall asking the Universe for an opportunity to learn greater patience,

but there ya have it. But even she’s providing a form of healing. She’s teaching me the value of calmness in the midst of her whirling-dervishness. I whisper to her sometimes, like you would to an upset child, and watch the transformation, in her and in me. When I speak to her calmly, she calms. When I’m loving to her, she’s all love and licks. It’s a whole dog-whisperer thing we’re trying out.

And if this doesn’t continue to work, she’s getting her own overturned bucket.

Until next time: “I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul.” — William Ernest Henley

Dr. Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist, minister, and educator, in private practice in Chattanooga, and the author of “Empowering the Tribe” and “The Power of a Partner.” Visit his web site at www.DrRPH.com

Healing Is As Healing Does

Dr. Rick

Shrink RapOPINION

“The possibilities of healing and wellness can take limitless forms, and can enter and

enrich your life from directions you may never have considered, if you’re open to it.”


100 Black MenCOVER STORY

Story by Reginald Owens • Photography by Blake Hampton

The Power of 100 Black Men

The national African American poverty rate is at 24.7 percent. The African American unemploy-ment rate is at 15.8 percent. But nobody really needs to check information from the Bureau of Labor Statistics or the Census Bureau to know that the numbers within the black community are staggering—and aren’t getting any better. Every day a single mother yearns for help guiding her son through this Olympic ob-stacle course called life. Somewhere, a young black man dreams of going to college, but the expenses of tuition would put his family in debt. Not many people have arms strong enough to offer a helping hand to these types of situations. Yet there is a devoted organization that dedicates its entire purpose to taking on this very responsibility.

The 100 Black Men of America, Inc. is an international organization that focuses all of its efforts on nurturing youth in black communities, doing whatever it can to give young black men a proper op-portunity to reach and excel past their goals. Its mission: “To improve the quality of life within our communities and enhance educational and economic opportunities for all African Americans.” The objectives listed in that state-ment are easier said than done, and it takes pure dedication to achieve such goals.



The earliest assembly of The 100 Black Men of America, called “The 100” for short, happened in the heart of New York in 1963. Legendary athlete Jackie Robinson was among the first group of African American men who came together at the beginning stages of the organization. Their common concern for the current condition and fu-ture of their black community brought the notable men together—and they decided to do something about it.

By the late 1970s, chapters of the orga-nization were established in Indianapolis, Atlanta, Los Angeles, St. Louis, Pittsburgh, San Francisco/Oakland, Alton, Nassau/Suf-folk, and Sacramento. The expansion of The 100 continued in 1997 when chapters were founded in England, the Bahamas, Jamaica, Goree Island, the U.S. Virgin Islands, and Senegal.

Now the organization includes 116 chap-ters, stretching its helping hand out to com-munities across the world. The Chattanooga chapter was established in 1993, and quickly became a commanding force in creating a change in the city’s black youth. Erskine Oglesby, president of the Chattanooga chap-ter of The 100 Black Men of America, Inc., holds true to the international organization’s mission by committing his life to making a change in this society one step at a time.

Oglesby, a Tennessee State University alumnus, first joined forces with The 100 while living in Jackson, MS. He was an execu-tive director for the YMCA during the devas-tation of Hurricane Katrina, taking on the job of developing reconstruction grants for parts of Mississippi and Louisiana. After moving to Chattanooga, he immediately joined the lo-cal chapter of The 100 and took charge of a successful initiative within the organization, eventually stepping up to the role of presi-dent. The passion behind his views and values remains as strong today as it did when he first joined years ago.

“We want to give the youth, from elemen-

tary school to college, the opportunity and the support they need to develop strong character, work ethic, and to get the most academic achievement they can through a support system of African American males that have been in their same situations,” says Oglesby.

His personal goals are identical to the en-tire organization’s mission, which shows the unified direction of both members and exec-utives. The name “The 100 Black Men” was chosen to represent solidarity, and this is a definite factor in the organization’s nonstop locomotion when working on programs in de-prived neighborhoods. It takes a strong unit to come together and execute a plan, and The 100 takes unity very seriously—so much so, the members of the organization interact more like a large family than a group of un-related volunteer workers. Yet the members do it all for free.

“We are an all-volunteer organization with no paid staff, so about 90 percent of the money that comes into the organization goes back into the community and to the kids,” says Oglesby.

But there is a Paul Bunyan-sized group of volunteer organizations in every city with lists of changes they want to make. Some of these organizations lack direction and proper planning. So how does The 100 make good on their word here in Chattanooga? What’s the plan behind their mission?

“Our goal is to improve the quality of life for the individuals in the community in which we have chapters. That’s done largely through our mentoring program, which is our primary focus,” says Oglesby.

“Mentoring The 100 Way Across A Life-time” is one of the major programs The 100 uses to support young black men in the com-munity. It’s also one of the most effective youth-development programs in Chatta-nooga. The program starts with a member of The 100 and a young black man in need of a guiding hand—the mentor and the mentee.

“Through our mentoring and scholarship programs, we have seen young individuals go off and become doctors, teachers, coaches, and come back to make an active impact

in the community.”



The mentee is accepted under the wing of a member after being brought to the organiza-tion’s attention. But the doors aren’t always being kicked down by kids lined up around the block looking for a mentor; sometimes the organization reaches out to the mentee.

“Primarily we work directly with the schools in our community, seeking out students in need of mentoring,” explains Oglesby. “We also accept students whose parents call and ask for assistance. We also branch out and work with other agencies that may have spe-cific talents for helping that particular young man. We want to collaborate to get the best results, because we understand some agen-cies have better understandings about cer-tain problems in our youth.”

Along with working with other agencies to ensure all areas of the mentee’s life are sup-ported, the mentor devotes as much energy as he can to help develop the young man’s skills and talents while directing him down a sound path.

“Our approach to mentoring is a holistic approach to the youth,” says Oglesby. The mentors hold workshops with the ment-ees that focus on specific target areas. The 100 pinpoint these areas as “Positive Self Identity and Personal Vision, Life Skills, So-cial and Emotional Skills, Moral Character, Work Ethic, and Lifelong Learning.” To en-sure growth and progress with the mentees, a mentor has to be well equipped for the job himself.

“To be a mentor, you have to develop a personal relationship with that young man. You have to gain a trust. There cannot be any pre-judgments of the youth,” says Oglesby. “You have to develop a rapport [with the mentee] so that you can have open discus-sions about what’s going on in the mentee’s life. And then you have to develop a struc-tured plan for that youth, charting a course of the youth’s life so that the mentee can get the best results out of what life has to of-fer.”

But the work of the mentoring program is never done. As the young mentees grow

older and reach their goals, many of them pay it forward to a younger generation and become mentors themselves.

“Over the years, through our mentor-ing and scholarship programs, we have seen young individuals go off and become doctors, teachers, coaches, and come back to make an active impact in the community. They at-tribute their experiences to being a part of the mentoring program,” Oglesby says.

When a previous mentee returns to the organization to give back to the community, it’s a sure sign of how powerful and funda-mental the mentoring program really is for the young men who get the chance to be a part of it.

“One of the things that we want the men-tees to get out of the organization is that af-ter they achieve their education and experi-ences, they have an urge to come back and make an impact in another youth’s life. If we can keep that going, that is true growth in an organization,” Oglesby emphasizes.

In addition to its mentoring initiative, The 100 provides an education program that pro-vides young men (and women) with scholar-ships so that they can make it through col-lege without accumulating massive debt or taking out too many loans.

“Over the years, we’ve given over $370,000 in scholarships to both males and females,” says Oglesby. “That’s where the bulk of our financial resources go.”

But it’s not just about the scholarship money. The 100 wants to make sure every teenager supported by the education pro-gram understands the importance of the education they are receiving. Even though it’s an undoubtedly powerful and defining achievement, not everyone sees a college degree as an option. One of the greatest things The 100 does for the youth in under-privileged communities is to open their eyes to the possibilities that are available with an education and teach them the significance of a degree—whether it be a bachelor’s degree or an associate’s degree.

“We want to add a socialization compo-

“We are an all-volunteer organization with no paid staff, so about 90 percent of the money that

comes into the organization goes back into the community and to the kids.”


nent to get students outside and be-yond their normal community so that they can look at their options,” explains Oglesby. “They need to develop skills to be able to interact with all segments of our population.”

Another key program the organiza-tion implements is its economic em-powerment initiative, designed to teach young people correct ways to handle and save money, invest income, and finance a home. Members of The 100 hold seminars on credit, while also ex-plaining ways that young men can build their own business.

Topics like these are revisited and ex-panded on in another program called the L.I.F.E. Academy, which is an acronym for “Living In Full Expectation.” This program is a platform for The 100 to be a part of a young black man’s life for an entire year, They create an agreement with the families of the youth that they will work with the kids “from August to August”. The young men inducted into the program get to take trips to college campuses in different cities—and it is of-ten their first time seeing a university. Notably, exposing the young people they work with to environments they wouldn’t have the chance to experience otherwise is a recurring effort with the 100.

Although these programs all have different names, they all have one common goal: developing the black youth into the best people they can possibly be. The men who are the life-blood of the organization are all filled with same passion—and The 100 isn’t running short on dedicated members.

“Our chapter is actually starting to grow. After taking a step back and looking at what we can do better, we decided to focus on keeping our members engaged,” explains Ogles-by.

A Fortune 500 company wouldn’t give a talented, man-ager-qualified employee an array of secretary work or tasks

that are unchallenging. The employee would get bored and begin to lose interest. In the same light, The 100 tries to keep their members as dutiful and devoted as they were on the first day they joined.

“When you become a member of the 100 Black Men, you are assigned a committee. That particular committee is based on your strengths, talents, and most importantly, your passion,” says Oglesby. “By keeping the members engaged, it keeps the organization strong.”

However, he points out that despite the organization’s long history and many programs, some people simply still don’t know about it.

“We want to get the word out to the community about what we’re doing as an organization, to let them know about the programs that we have and the positive results that can come from those programs,” Oglesby says.

So the last remaining question about The 100 is simple:

How do you join? It’s just like apply-ing for a job, except you don’t need a chunky resume and there’s no at-least-five-years-of-experience requirement. Just fill out an application, sit down for an interview, and see if you’re a good fit.

“One thing about the 100 Black Men is that we are not about the num-bers, but we are about the quality and the passion about each individual that wants to do something to build a stron-ger community. That’s really what it’s all about,” Oglesby stresses.

The 100 looks to have a successful evening with “A Night To Remember”, a local concert featuring headlining music artists. Since 1987, this event has raised a substantial amount of funding for several volunteer organi-zations, including The 100. This year’s line-up features performances by the legendary Charlie Wilson and Grammy Award-nominated Calvin Richardson

on April 8, 2011.Also upcoming is the Annual Men’s Health Screening, an

educational event sponsored by The 100’s health-wellness program, on May 17-19. This will take place at Boynton Terrace, Dodson Avenue and Southside Health Centers. Prostate screenings, high-blood pressure checks, and HIV testing is provided for free, as well as information on health preventative awareness.

The effort is far from over. “When other people see that you love what you’re doing

and that you’re making a difference, they want to be a part of that,” says Oglesby.

The 100 Black Men of America, Inc. actually makes a dif-ference, and will continue to do so for generations to come.

To contact 100 Black Men of Chattanooga, call them at (423) 821-6700 or visit www.100bmchatt.org



Never in my life have I seen or experienced the excitement accumulating in Chattanooga’s electronic dance music scene (EDM for short). The crowds are coming in by the hundreds, the energy is palpable, the crowds break all cultural barriers, and the beats demand your attention. As local promoter Shawn Roberts puts it, “This is a counterculture with no boundaries.”

The beauty of EDM is that it encompasses all forms of music, from Radiohead to Daft Punk to Bassnectar to Black Eyed Peas, then back again. The differences don’t stop there. You could at-tend a bass-heavy dubstep event one night and be in a diverse mix of the rowdiest kids in Chattanooga—and then attend a house music event mingling with a colorful crew of people in a relaxing setting.

In the past two years, Chattanooga has experienced a live music renaissance. While places like JJ’s Bohemia and Discoteca have been consistently delivering in the punk rock and indie scenes, promoters like chattATTACK and Fresh News are consistently delivering dance-friendly music events in the city.

The difference between a traditional night club such as The Drink and a dance music event such as NightMoves or Swagga is that people go out to the clubs to drink and hook up. The audi-ence for EDM parties comes out simply to hear music that they cannot listen to anywhere in mainstream media.

Starting February 4, for the first time, two of the major week-end EDM events are coming together to offer a weekend pass. Chattanooga’s music scene is refocusing on collaborative efforts to help bring the city’s electronic scene more into focus.

Swagga is a bass music night that happens every first Friday and is hosted by chattATTACK, a local production and promotion company. Every month there are two guests—a major headlining producer and a local guest DJ. The kind of music you will hear at Swagga can range from really hard-hitting dub-step fused with hip-hop to electro-house. If you love music that makes your subwoofers explode, you will feel welcomed.

This month, Swagga will feature Total Recall, a Greenville, SC-based dubstep production team. They have releases on Abstract Logic Recordings, Play Me Records and Betamorph. Total Recall has four tracks on Beatport’s top 100 charts. (Beatport is the primary online music store and authority for electronic music.)

Swagga’s resident DJs consist of Bassel, Xphakder, and Antares. Bassel delivers dark and massively gritty dubstep music mixed with hip-hop hits. Antares is a veteran DJ beast who hits you hard with drum and bass and dubstep. Xphakder delivers his own brand of electro, dubstep, and pop.

Swagga has been running for only three months, but has already caught the atten-tion of prominent record labels. In January,

Swagga invited house-electro act Depressed Buttons, which caught the attention of Diplo’s Mad Decent Records. Diplo is primarily known for producing the M.I.A.’s grammy nominated single “Paper Planes” and is one half of dancehall party act Major Lazer.

Nightmoves is an EDM night that happens every first Sat-urday of the month and is hosted by Fresh News. This month’s special guest is Wick-It Tha Instigator from Nashville. Wick-It recently released The Brothers of Chico Dusty, an EP that com-bines elements from Black Keys and Big Boi’s recent albums. Wick-It has gained praise from major publications and artists like

Outkast for his solid EP. Nightmoves has been running since July

2010 and has featured producers and DJs from around the world. The type of mu-sic can range from dancehall, dubstep, house, disco, drum and bass, hip-hop and more. Nightmoves has featured everything from international artist like Trinidad’s Jil-lionare, a collaborator of Major Lazer to Heroes+Villians .

Both Nightmoves’ & Swagga’s favorite act is Heroes+Villains, based on the energy that the performer brings and the crossover appeal with production & dubstep remixes for Lil’ Jon, Wakka Flocka Flame, Justin

Timberlake and more. The Nightmoves crew is made up of Axis1, Drugmoney and

Talk, each bringing in their own distinct style of music and beats. Axis1 has influences ranging everywhere from house music, psy-chedelic, and disco. Drugmoney brings in the darker and grimier sub-bass sounds of dubstep. Talk brings to the table forward bass music and newer and darker sounds that haven’t been heard any-where else.

The EDM scene in Chattanooga has evolved into new heights, and has gained international attention from some of the best producers in electronic music. If you want to get a glimpse into the future of music, check out both events this weekend!

FeatureMUSIC

By Dave Castaneda, Pulse Music Writer

Chattanooga’s EDM Scene Heats Up

“The beauty of EDM is that it encompasses all forms of music, from Radiohead to Daft Punk to Bassnectar to Black Eyed Peas, then back again.” SWAGGA with Total Recall

$10 for 18-plus, $5 for 21-plus 10 p.m.Friday, February 4 412 MRKT Basement, 412 Market St. (Next to Sing It or Wing It) NIGHTMOVES with Wick-It$10 for 18-plus10 p.m.Saturday, February 5 412 MRKT Main Room, 412 Market St.


ThursdayJimmy Harris6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.comOpen Mic8 p.m. The CampHouse, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081. www.thecamphouse.comBuzzoven, Gravebound, K Lloyd, Rough Rope9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemiaThe Bluegrass Pharaohs with Moon Slew9 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.comYattie Westfield9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn). facebook.com/theofficechattVideo DJ Nick9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878.

FridayJohnny Cash Tribute Band5 p.m. Chattanooga Choo Choo Victorian Lounge, 1400 Market St. (423) 266-5000.Ben Friberg Trio6 p.m. Table 2, 232 E. 11th St. (423) 756-8253. www.table2restaurant.comJimmy Harris6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.comThe David Grier All Stars8 p.m. Barking Legs, 1322 Dodds Avenue. (423) 624-5347. www.barkinglegs.orgBen Friberg8:30 p.m. The Foundry, 1201 South Broad St. (423) 756-3400. www.chattanooganhotel.comAmber Fults9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn). facebook.com/theofficechattSun Domingo9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919. www.myspace.com/jimstrikerDJ 33 and Dancing9 p.m. Backstage (inside Holiday Bowl), 5518 Brainerd Rd. (423) 899-2695.DJ and Dancing9 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com

DJ and Dancing9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.comDJ and Dancing9 p.m. Spectators, 7804 E. Brainerd Rd. (423) 648- 6679. SWAGGA with Total Recall 10 p.m., 412 MRKT Basement, 412 Market St. Downstream with Black Betty and Dangerous New Machine10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.comKris Roe (The Ataris), Johnny Dropout, Wet Cadillac, Iron Fez10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. Travis Kilgore10 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.comCadillac Saints10 p.m. T-Bones, 1419 Chestnut St. (423) 266-4240. www.tboneschattanooga.com

SaturdayJohnny Cash Tribute Band5 p.m. Chattanooga Choo Choo Victorian Lounge, 1400 Market St. (423) 266-5000.Subsoul6 p.m. The Social (next to Public House), 1110 Market St., Ste. 101.Jimmy Harris6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055.

2nFRO8 p.m. Southside Saloon & Bistro, 1301 Chestnut St. (423) 757-4730. southsidesaloonandbistro.comBen Friberg8:30 p.m. The Foundry, 1201 South Broad St. (423) 756-3400. www.chattanooganhotel.comSun Domingo9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919. www.myspace.com/jimstriker A.J. Stone9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn). facebook.com/theofficechattDJ 33 and Dancing9 p.m. Backstage (inside Holiday Bowl), 5518 Brainerd Rd. (423) 899-2695.DJ and Dancing9 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com

Open Mic at The CampHouseNever know what new genius you may hear…No cover.8 p.m.The CampHouse, 1427 Williams St.(423) 702-8081. www.thecamphouse.com

Kris Roe, Johnny Dropout, Wet

Cadillac, Iron FezRoe from The Ataris

headlines a killer line-up.$10

10 p.m.JJ’s Bohemia,

231 E. MLK Blvd.(423) 266-1400.

myspace.com/jjsbohemia

Concert Calendar MUSIC

THURSDAY FRIDAY


DJ and Dancing9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.comDJ and Dancing9 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.comCommodity Saturdays 2/5: DJK79 p.m. The Social (next to Public House), 1110 Market St., Ste. 101.Abbey Road Live9:30 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.comNIGHTMOVES with Wick-It10 p.m. 412 MRKT Main Room, 412 Market St. www.goo.gl/30AJvMoon Slew10 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.comTJ Greever and Danimal Pinson10 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.tremonttavern.com

Karaoke with DJ Stoli10 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.comThe Weeks, Faretheewell, Behold the Brave10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemiaRoger Alan Wade10 p.m. T-Bones, 1419 Chestnut St. (423) 266-4240. www.tboneschattanooga.com

SundayTraditional Irish Music 3 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192. Open Mic with Jeff Daniels 4 p.m. Ms. Debbie’s Nightlife Lounge 4762 Highway 58, (423) 485-0966.myspace.com/debbiesloungeDJ and Dancing9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.comKaraoke with DJ Stoli9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com

MondayOld Tyme Players6 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (433) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.comLive DJ – Karaoke8 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777.

Big Band Night8 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. Karaoke with DJ Stoli9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878.

TuesdayBen Friberg Trio6:30 p.m. Table 2, 232 E. 11th St. (423) 756-8253. www.table2restaurant.comOpen Mic with Mike McDade9 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.comOpen Mic and Karaoke9 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs Downtown, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956. www.sugarsribs.comTim and Reece9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. Karaoke with DJ Stoli9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. Unspoken Truth, Faded, Permillisecond10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia

WednesdayJimmy Harris6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055.

DJ Spins – Karaoke Contest9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.comJohnston Brown9 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com

Concert Calendar MUSIC

Moon SlewSolo show with the standout local band.No cover10 p.m.Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St.(423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com

Irish Music SessionsHoist a Guinness and

feel the Celtic vibe.No cover

3 p.m.The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy.

(423) 468-4192. Find them on Facebook.

SATURDAY TUESDAY

Got a gig coming up that you want to tell the world about? Don't rely just on flyers, word-of-mouth and posts of Facebook and MySpace.

All you need to do to get the word out for free is to send us your in-formation (the basic when, where and time) and we will list it here in the weekly music calendar.

Email the particulars to us at [email protected] at least ten days before the event.

And for last minute changes and updates to the calendar, visit www.chattanoogahasfun.com


A friend of mine has a pet name for a certain subgenre of underground rock bands, i n c l u d i n g L i g h t n i n g

Bolt and Deerhoof—he calls them “En-ergy Brothers,” named after a Saturday Night Live skit featuring Adam Sandler and Chris Farley as two spastic, performance artists/comedians. Such bands have a cer-tain unrestrained quality about them with

a key ingredient: overloaded, insane drum-ming, laden with fills and a disregard for convention. Deerhoof has always been a band that’s hard to pin down; sure, it has its Energy Brothers moments, but it dabbles with a wide variety of sound textures and moods, with altered genres and a unifying element of a sonic playfulness. Few bands have the ability, as Deerhoof does, to be simultaneously crazy, intense, and cute.The new Deerhoof album, Deerhoof Vs.

Evil, features the four-person lineup heard on 2008’s Offend Maggie, with band founder and drummer Greg Saunier, singer and bassist Satomi Matsuzaki, and guitar-ists John Dieterich and Ed Rodriguez. The most apparent development on the album is, strangely, a sense of restraint; while each song is sonically interesting in its own

way, listeners familiar with the band may continually be awaiting some kind of re-lease or eruption of volume amid a flurry of notes. Those moments are carefully doled out on Deerhoof Vs. Evil, like the de-nouement of “Secret Mobilization” which finally lets loose with chugging guitars and big, pounding drums or the responding rock-guitar riffs on “Behold a Marvel in the Darkness.” The album’s song sequence flow could have stood some improvement (2005’s The Runners Four had a similar is-sue), but the album improves upon each listen. When taking each song individually, the album works better as a collection of tracks with the expected attention to de-tail, displaced ethnic/genre-exercise flour-ishes, and an off-kilter notion of pop/rock music.

Roscoe Mitchell and the Note FactoryFar Side(ECM)

Ernie Paik's New Music ReviewsMUSIC

DeerhoofDeerhoof Vs. Evil(Polyvinyl)

“Far Side carries the spirit of bringing boundary-pushing jazz into the future.”

The motto “Great Black Mu-sic: Ancient to the Future” of the non-profit Association for the Advancement of Creative Musi-cians (AACM) was adopted by one of the groups that grew from it, the legendary Art Ensemble of Chicago. Saxophonist and com-poser Roscoe Mitchell was an early member of the AACM and co-founded the Art Ensemble of Chicago, which was known for creating a highly inventive, dy-namic, and adventurous kind of avant-garde jazz with vivid live shows featuring African costumes and a variety of unconven-tional instruments. Mitchell seems to keep the aforementioned slogan in mind, over four decades since the Art Ensemble of Chicago was formed, on his latest release.

Far Side was recorded live in 2007 at the Burghausen Jazz Festival, and perhaps when assembling the lineup, Mitchell was taking in-spiration from Ornette Coleman’s Free Jazz al-bum, which featured a pair of quartets playing simultaneously; this performance also features a double quartet, with Mitchell backed by a pi-ano/drums/double bass combo and trumpeter Corey Wilkes heading the other similar quar-tet.

The opening half-hour-long number, “Far Side / Cards / Far Side,” starts with a calm,

slow-burn approach, beginning with low, mysterious tones and barely audible trumpet whimpers. The song transforms from a haze of faint piano rumbles into a low-key, mini-mal, sauntering, meandering jazz piece with Mitchell’s evocative, exposed sax playing, and at the half-way point, it shifts again into more frenetic, chaotic abstractions with busy drum-ming and scampering piano runs, sustaining a healthy intensity for 15 minutes.

“Quintet 2007 A for Eight” begins with tuneful melodies underscored with uneasiness, hinting at an uncertainty that challenges the listener to guess what’s composed and what’s improvised. With an excellent sound quality, stirring performances, and an inviting com-plexity, Far Side carries the spirit of bringing boundary-pushing jazz into the future.


The chief’s office was in the center of the building, up above the main public entrance to headquarters. It was the only one with floor-to-ceiling glass on one wall that cast sunlight on a disheveled desk in the center of the room, behind which a very large man sat screaming into a very small phone, all of which nicely complemented a very scared patrolman across from it all.

His distraction from me was a mixed blessing; it took his immediate attention off me and the subject for which I was completely blameless. Yet it only prolonged theinevitable return of those bloodshot eyes to my face, and all the awful words now flowing around those yellow picket-fence teeth would be cast in my direction instead of at the unfortunate person on the other end of that phone.

Keeping my back stiff and heels nonchalantly dug into the carpet in case I needed to make a break for the partially open door should he suddenly lunge for my throat (you just…you’d just have to have seen this man angry in person to understand the reason for my dramatic undertones.) I chanced a glance to my right out of his office window and spied someone in nearly as dire straits as I, and selfish as it may be…it gave me a few seconds of much-needed comfort.

It was a Friday afternoon hand-off: The weekend ritual of the Divorced. (Wouldn’t that be a great name for a horror movie? The Grudge, The Ring, The Divorced? Same thing, yeah?)

The situation was by no means rare, not even uncommon in today’s society…but just as any prison has varying levels of security from “general population” to

“lock down”, these were the worst of the worst. The front parking lot of the police department was the “death row” of hand-off points for the hapless children on their every-other-seven-or-14-day rituals.

These were the couples whose separations had been so bitter and full of malice that they could only exchange offspring on grounds filled with armed men

and women, ready to use any and all force necessary for the party most angered at that particular moment to demand instant documentation of the slightest deviation in time, garments, possessions, and even mandated haircuts; lawyers were on speakerphone in shirt pockets, and digital recorders were fully charged and running at their peak sound settings. (“What was that you said?” and “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” were dead giveaways to a wire, and the spurned had to be on their A game.)

I’ve had to take those reports time and again: Things as major as documentation of a bruise upon the child's return (some kids play football in grass), and as minor as a smudged shoe (an attempt to show a negative environment the child almost certainly barely escaped with his or her life).

Sometimes the parents were separated by several parking spaces, and the children were sent slowly lugging their own baggage from point A to B like an outlaw returning a hostage to a suspicious sheriff in the middle of a dusty Old West Main Street, the glare of the sun

nearly masking the errant tumbleweed passing nearby…and sometimes the parents were close, staring each other down like competing panthers slowly circling one another, sinewy muscles glinting in the light as they moved paw over paw with the precision of any apex predator daring one another to blink first, until the child and their mandatory backpack had moved from one vehicle to another.

Whatever the choice in exchange methods, one thing was always a constant: Tension as thick as a strip-club bouncer’s neck. I was trying to pick the Alpha of the couple below when somewhere in another world, I heard a phone slam down into its cradle and Chief Ralph Cothran utter the words, “NOW WHERE THE %@#& WERE WE, MR. I-THINK-PUTTING-A-OPPOSUM-IN-THE-GYM SHOWER-IS-FUNNY?! OH, YEAH, I KNOW YOU DONE THAT SHIT, AND YOU ’BOUT TO SEE FUNNY, MISTAH FUNNY MAN!”

A bead of sweat rolled down my temple and in my peripheral vision I saw the former couple drive away in opposite directions, taking their conflicted child away, along with the brief comfort they gave me.

(And I did not, in fact, feel like “Mr. Funny Man”.)

When Officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he is an occasional student, car-penter, boating enthusiast, and spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center. Follow him on Facebook at www.facebook.com/alex.teach

The Hand-Off: A Brief Respite

Alex Teach

On The BeatOPINION

“The front parking lot of the police department was the ‘death row’ of hand-

off points for the hapless children on their every-other-seven-or-14-day rituals.”


When Antonin Dvorák (di-VOR-zhak) packed his bags to head to America for the first time in 1892, he had already conquered the European musical scene. With hon-orary doctorates from Cambridge, the University of Prague and a noted position in the Czech Academy of Art and Sci-ence, there was little more for this celebrated genius to ac-complish in Europe.

Dvorák was reluctant to cross the Atlantic, but was given an offer he couldn’t refuse: He would be head of the newly formed New York National Conservatory for two years. For a salary of $15,000—no small fortune on the cusp of the 20th century— Dvorák would teach by day, compose and conduct by night, and be given four months to explore the Americas.

The New York National Conservatory was a remarkably forward-thinking school for its day, often giving consider-able discounts to the economically disadvantaged and free rides to black students. It was here that he composed a cadre of famous works, including his Symphony No. 9 in E minor From the New World, which will be performed by the Chat-tanooga Symphony Orchestra this Thursday and Friday evening.

Dvorak subtitled his ninth symphony From the New World as it was the first piece he completed while living stateside. The work reflects his deepening fascination with Native and African American melodies. “These beautiful and varied themes are the product of the soil. They are American,” he wrote in Harper’s Magazine in 1895. “In the Negro melodies of America, I discovered all that is needed for a great and noble school of music.”

The ninth symphony is arguably Dvorák’s most commonly heard work in the concert hall, rivaled only by his Slavonic Dances and the unstoppable Carnival Overture. It contains a panoply of familiar and well-loved themes, particularly the second movement English horn melody, which has been hijacked innumerable times with texts over the years by hymnists (“Going Home”) and songsters.

This week’s CSO Masterworks concert will be conducted by Markand Thakar in lieu of Robert Bern-hardt as part of the orchestra’s continuing search for a new musical director. Thakar is currently music director of the Duluth Superior Symphony Orchestra and the Baltimore

Chamber Orchestra, as well as principal conductor of the Duluth Festival Opera. He earned a bach-elor’s degree in composition and violin performance from The Juilliard School, a master’s degree in mu-sic theory from Columbia University, and a doctor-ate in orchestral conducting from the Cincinnati College-Conservatory.

In addition to his conducting, Thakar has earned a wide reputation for his innovative programming. This week’s program is entitled “Bernstein & Dvorák” and features Beethoven’s Overture to Coriolan and Leonard Bernstein’s Symphonic Suite from On the Waterfront, the classic Elia Kazan motion picture starring Marlon Brando.

With Dvorák’s ninth rounding out the program, these three choices may seem to be an odd juxtaposition, what

with the pulsing romantic lyricism of the Beethoven and the decidedly clamorous, at-mospheric beauty of Bernstein’s film score, but this seems to be Thakar’s modus operandi. The program notes describe the “humanity and compassion” of the Beethoven leading into the high emotion of On the Waterfront and culminating with the Dvorák’s promise of “new life made of foreign ingredients but emerging with a clear American flavor.”

Even after due consideration of the bril-liance of these other two composers Dvorák’s Symphony No. 9 in E minor seems to remain the centerpiece of this week’s concert. From its thundering first movement which states a host of spine-tingling melodic ideas to the euphoric finale that weaves them all together, this symphony remains a distinctly American expression even as it flowed from the pen of an intensely patriotic Czech composer.

When the conductor’s score closed after the premiere of this, his first American work, Dvorák departed New York with his family for a few weeks to visit the Czech popula-tion of Spillville, Iowa—a taste of home, perhaps. This was only after his “New World” was greeted with an elongated ovation at its premiere, a gesture of praise that became one of the most ebullient and profound expressions of gratitude he ever received from an audience. The symphony remains a timeless work that exalts the peoples and cultures Dvorák found so rich, and one that, in memorializing them, contin-ues to exult listeners more than a hundred years later.

CSO Masterworks: “Bernstein and Dvorák”$19 - $798 p.m.February 3 and 4Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St.(423) 267-8583, www.chattanoogasymphony.org

FeatureARTS

By Phillip Johnston, Pulse Arts Writer

CSO Offers Innovative Evening of Masterworks

“In the Negro melodies of America, I discovered all that is needed for a great and noble school of music.”


Free Family Films: Nanny McPhee Returns4 p.m. Ooltewah-Collegedale Branch Library, 9318 Apison Pk. (423)757-5310. Friends of African American Art6 p.m. Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944. Night Watch7 p.m. Bryan College, 721 Bryan Dr., Dayton TN. (423) 775-2041.Lecture: “The Holy Lands in Classical Islam”7 p.m. UTC University Center, Room 206. (423) 425-4334. Junebug Productions Drama7:30 p.m. Southern Adventist University, 4881 Taylor Cir., Collegedale, TN. (423) 236-2089.United States Army Field Band7:30 p.m. UTC Fine Arts Center Roland Hayes Hall, 725 Vine St. (423) 425-4601. Steve Hofstetter8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233.

Opening Reception: “Sustaining Views”6:30 p.m. River Gallery, 400 E. 2nd St. (423) 265-5033. www.river-gallery.comMusic Documentary Film Series: Afgan Star7 p.m. Folk School of Chattanooga, 250 Forest Ave. (423) 827-8906. www.chattanoogafolk.comOpening Reception: Linda Rugina, Jerry Allen, Jerry Green, Charlie Newton7 p.m. Mosaic Gallery, 412 Market St. (423) 320-6738.Night Watch7 p.m. Bryan College, 721 Bryan Dr., Dayton TN. (423) 775-2041.CELLARbration7 p.m. Walden Club, 633 Chestnut St # 2100. (423) 855-7570. hatcherfoundation.org/cellarbrationFriday Night Improv7 p.m. Chattanooga State, 4501 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 697-3246.

Threepenny Opera7:30 p.m. St. Andrew’s Center, 1918 Union Ave. (423) 987-5141. Steve Hofstetter7:30, 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. Chattanooga Ghost Tour7:30 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 1 Walnut St. (423) 821-7125. Tennessee Wild Film Series: Jeremiah Johnson8 p.m. green|spaces , 63 E. Main St. (423) 322-7866. www.TNWild.orgCSO Masterworks: Bernstein and Dvorak8 p.m. Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St. (423) 267-8583. www.chattanoogasymphony.orgMystery of Flight 1388:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839. Female Impersonation ShowMidnight. Images, 6065 Lee Hwy. (423) 855-8210. www.imagesbar.com

In Depth Photography Seminar9 a.m. Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. Valentine Dish Gardens10 a.m. Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. Wine and Chocolate Open House10 a.m. Georgia Winery, 6469 Battlefield Pkwy. Ringgold, GA. (706) 937-2177. Hank the Chimp Memorial Service (also free Zoo admission all day)1 p.m. Chattanooga Zoo Education Center, 1254 E. Third St. (423) 697-1322.Threepenny Opera2 p.m. St. Andrew’s Center, 1918 Union Ave. (423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreofchattanooga.comThree BMWs 6 p.m. New Monumental Baptist Church, 901 Woodmore Lane. (423) 629-6106.Mystery at the Nightmare Office Party6 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839.

Hubble 3D6 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. Chattanooga Heart Ball6 p.m. Chattanoogan Hotel, 1201 Broad St. (423) 763-4412.Ultimate Wave Tahiti 3D7 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. Night Watch7 p.m. Bryan College, 721 Bryan Dr., Dayton TN. (423) 775-2041.Chattanooga Ghost Tour7:30 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 1 Walnut St. (423) 821-7125. www.chattanoogaghosttours.comSteve Hofstetter7:30, 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.comFemale Impersonation ShowMidnight. Images, 6065 Lee Hwy. (423) 855-8210. www.imagesbar.com

First Free SundayNoon. Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944. Chattanooga Premier Bridal ShowNoon. Chattanooga Convention Center, 1150 Carter St. (423) 756-0001Chattanooga Improvisors Collective Open Jam3 p.m. Barking Legs, 1322 Dodds Avenue. (423) 624-5347. www.barkinglegs.orgValentine Dinner Train Excursion5:30 p.m. Tennessee Valley Railroad Museum, 4119 Cromwell Rd. Member’s Choice Photographic Art ExhibitThe Gallery at Blackwell, 71 Eastgate Loop. (423) 344-5643.“Heirloom”Shuptrine Fine Art Group, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453. “It’s Not Easy Being Green”North River Civic Center, 1009 Executive Dr. Ste. 102. (423) 870-8924.

THURSDAY FRIDAY

CSO Masterworks: Bernstein & Dvorak

Guest conductor is Markand Thakar.$19 - $798 p.m.Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St. (423) 267-8583. www.chattanoogasymphony.org

SATURDAY SUNDAY

“Wrapped in Pride: Ghanaian Kente and

African American Identity”New exhibit features many examples of textiles and objects made with kente cloth.$710 a.m. - 5 p.m.Bessie Smith Cultural Center, 200 E. MLK Blvd.(423) 266-8658. www.bessiesmithcc.org

Threepenny OperaEnsemble Theatre of

Chattanooga takes on the Brecht/Weill classic.$156:30 p.m.St. Andrews Center, 1918 Union Ave.(423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreofchattanooga.com

Merrybellies 6th Annual Gems of the

Oasis Belly Dance ShowFeaturing bellydance troupes and soloists from throughout the area.$107 p.m.Barking Legs Theater, 1307 Dodds Ave.(423) 991-9555. www.barkinglegs.org

Events CalendarARTS


Lois Mailou Jones: A Life in Vibrant ColorMore than 70 works from the highly influential artist who was part of the Harlem Renaissance.

$9.95 (Free First Sunday, February 6, noon – 5 p.m.)Hunter Museum, 10 Bluff View.(423) 267-0968. www.huntermuseum.org

MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY EDITOR'S PICK: FEATURED EVENTValentine Dinner Train Excursion5:30 p.m. Tennessee Valley Railroad Museum, 4119 Cromwell Rd. www.tvrail.comLive Team Trivia6 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5840 Lake Resort Ter. (423) 870-0770. www.chattanoogatrivia.comChinese Calligraphy Class7 p.m. Call for address. (423) 821-8947. www.web.me.com/timefortaijiLee University Presidential Concert Series7:30 p.m. Lee University, 1120 North Ocoee St., Cleveland. (800) 533-9930. www.leeuniversity.eduE. A. Anderson Lecture8 p.m. Southern Adventist University, 4881 Taylor Cr., Collegedale. (423) 236-2089.Master Hypnotist Gary Conrad8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com

Southern Adventist University Open House10 a.m. Southern Adventist University, 4881 Taylor Cr., Collegedale, TN. (423) 236-2089.Lecture/reception: Artist Ian Pedigo5:30 p.m. UTC Fine Arts Center, Room 356. (423) 304-9781. www.utc.edu/cressgalleryValentine Dinner Train Excursion5:30 p.m. Tennessee Valley Railroad Museum, 4119 Cromwell Rd. www.tvrail.comSongwriter’s Line-up7 p.m. The Camphouse, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081.UTC Symphony Concert with Nikolasa Tejaro and Roland Carter7:30 p.m. UTC Fine Arts Center, Roland Hayes Concert Hall. (423) 425-4601. www.utc.edu/musicLive Team Trivia7:30 p.m. McHale’s Brewhouse, 724 Ashland Ter. (423) 877-2124.

Main Street Farmers Market4 p.m. Main St. at Williams St. www.mainstfarmersmarket.comValentine Dinner Train Excursion5:30 p.m. Tennessee Valley Railroad Museum, 4119 Cromwell Rd. www.tvrail.comT’ai Ji Class5:30 p.m. Call for address. (423) 821-8947. www.web.me.com/timefortaijiElective Recital6 p.m. Lee University, 1120 North Ocoee St., Cleveland, TN. (800) 533-9930. www.leeuniversity.eduA Gay Valentine’s Celebration8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. Live Team Trivia7:30 p.m. Buffalo Wild Wings, 120 Market St. (423) 634-0468. Speak Easy: Spoken Word and Poetry8 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. facebook.com/theofficechatt

Events CalendarARTS


Recently there was an unconfirmed allegation, but lawsuit nonetheless, that a favorite spot for Americans to “run to the border” has been a little lax in the consistency of their loose meat product. Seems that the ground “beef” used in many of the cheap, tasty treats we long for at midnight (or later) allegedly contained only 35 percent actual beef, the remaining 65 percent being made up of “filler”—whatever that is. The lawsuit, filed by some patron who’d simply “had his fill” of this “fact,” is claiming false advertising by the “Mexican” giant.

While the idea of this allegation immediately meant an end to my occasional hankering for a double “beef” and bean burrito, what really amazed me is what the FDA considers real beef. It seems that any restaurant can serve meat that contains as little as 70 percent actual beef and still be in good standing. The other 30 percent can be made up of fillers—which I equate to lips, tails, grizzle or even Styrofoam, for that matter.

However, the lawsuit at hand cites false advertising as the only litigation-worthy infraction bestowed on we hungry patrons of 59-, 79- and 99-cent foodstuffs. One man who was asked to comment on the allegation put it in true perspective—“You get what you pay for, so what did you expect?”

Truer words have never been spoken. I think if found guilty of false advertising, this fast-food

Alamo should be sentenced to start serving beef of at least

70 percent validity. Then we’ll see how long they can keep those enticing prices.

Probably one of the biggest examples of misleading advertising running on the telly these days are the “free” online credit-score services. Even as smart and sly as I think I am, I fell victim to their proposed offer. Now, I’m not an idiot. I know that in order to get your “free score” you have to sign up for the $14.95 monthly credit watch service they offer and, as anyone with a pulse can figure out, immediately cancel the service

within the seven-day trial period in order to really pay nothing.

Obviously they’re hoping that people will forget to cancel the service for a few months, or actually find value in their continuous watchdog analysis of your ever-changing credit scores. Otherwise, they wouldn’t be able to afford a spot on nearly every commercial break on just about every network. But they have other ways of milking a few bucks from ya.

The deal is that most of these services have aligned themselves with one of the three credit bureaus in such a way that they can give you “free” access to one-third of your big picture. They’ll gladly show you that one. However, in order to get all three scores, you have to click “OK” when prompted to “upgrade” from the basic $14.95 service of which you’ve agreed to a trial offer (which can be canceled within seven days at no charge) to one that is $24.95. Who cares? I’m gonna cancel immediately after this, and there’s no mention of any charge being non-refundable within the

trial period (at least as far as I can read without a magnifying glass), so here goes—“click.”

The next page displayed my three credit scores and actually gave me access to a full credit report. After careful review, I called the credit score service’s customer service number—hidden deep within the site—to cancel. And after a lengthy and compelling sales pitch, I was able to cancel. Then my credit card statement arrived. There was in fact a charge for $24.95 on it.

I immediately called the service to complain. The customer service rep said that this one-time fee was their actual “cost” for providing me all three credit scores. And, this non-refundable fee was “clearly stated” on the web page on which I clicked “OK” for the upgraded service. I implored to him that if in fact it was clearly stated that ANY fee proposed online was non-refundable, I would not have continued.

I explained my goal was to get the “free credit score” advertised, cancel the service within the trial period, and be charged nothing. Then after I said that I couldn’t have been the first to complain about this alleged false advertising, I asked that he send me a screen shot of—or direct link to—the web page on which the non-refundable fee was “clearly stated.” He couldn’t (or wouldn’t) do so. Why? Because it wasn’t stated “clearly” anywhere on the site and he knew it.

What a scam.But I should’ve known. If something sounds too good to

be true—whether it’s free access to what I think should be a God-given right to the credit information used to determine your future—or just a fine, mostly beef burrito for 99 cents, it probably is.

I learned my lesson though. Never trust anything Ben Stein says—ever!

Chuck Crowder is a local writer and general man about town. His opinions are just that. Everything expressed is loosely based on fact, and crap he hears people talking about. Take what you just read with a grain of salt, but pepper it in your thoughts. And be sure to check out his popular website at www.thenoog.com

As Seen On TV (Truth Be Damned)

Chuck Crowder

Life In The ‘NoogOPINION


Dean and Cindy have a 6-year-old daughter named Frankie. She is energetic, precocious and utterly adorable, but the first image of Blue Valentine shows her in a state of consternation. She is wandering through the tall grass of her family’s front yard in search of a lost dog. After alerting her father, the two scour the yard only to find the doghouse empty and its chain-link enclosure open. He comforts her and carries her into the house to say good morning to mom who has yet to rouse from sleep.

Before too long, the dog turns up dead and the emotional dam breaks for Dean (Ryan Gosling) and Cindy (Michelle Williams). They can’t handle the loss—not because the dog meant that much to them, but because their marriage has been layered with unresolved tension for years. In an attempt to recover, Dean suggests they drop Frankie off at Grandpa’s and go spend the weekend in “The Future Room” at a sexy motel, hoping that a day or two of drinks and sex will salve their relational wounds.

As the present begins to fall further apart, the past starts to weave together. Blue Valentine plays like a memory, shifting back and forth from the present to the past where we see Cindy as a young pre-med student who cares for her disabled grandmother in her free time and Dean as a good-natured high-school dropout working for a moving company. The two meet at the nursing home as Dean is moving an older gentle-man into a new room and Cindy is reading to her grandmother. Dean makes the first move and the two fall for each other.

The scenes in the past are shot on grainy 16-millimeter film

that lends a dream-like quality, while the present is filmed digitally with a claustropho-bic close-up immediacy. Engrained in the structure of the film is the idea that the past could not be more different from the present and that more than five years of neglected tension and lack of empathy have led to the impending destruction of a dream.

For this reason, some critics have derided Blue Valentine, labeling it another addition to an ever-increasing pile of films that define marriage as a secret sanctuary of sorrow where beautiful relationships go to die. Though this genre exists, I would suggest that Blue Valen-tine is not a film about marriage, but a simple story about two young people who have not yet come to see themselves as limited.

Dean and Cindy are unaware of any way of feeling or living that transcends what they have always known. Begrudgingly, they copy what they have seen presented to them by their parents and grandparents. “How do you trust your feelings

when they always disappear?” Cindy asks her grandmother. “Just have them,” the matri-arch replies.

Hence, in one moment Dean and Cindy can be drowning in selfishness and, in another, overcome with the genuine care and affec-tion that makes love work. The only constant is that feelings go and come. Nothing is per-manent and the smallest conflict can easily

become a nightmare.And yet the finest characters are the ones that can’t be reck-

oned with, who are too complex to distill into quick interpre-tative judgments. We may think we know how to fix Dean and Cindy’s problems from the ivory tower of our theater seats, but if we still feel this way by the end, we have failed to realize that we’ve just watched a film about ourselves. Even in all our complexity and inherent hypocrisy, each one of us knows that there is a Dean or a Cindy inside and that even the loveliest relationship can be sabotaged by selfishness and the illusion of

limitlessness. We all know less than we think we do and tend to arrive at reality completely unprepared.

Blue Valentine is a film more than 10 years in the making. Its director, Derek Cianfrance, printed off the script’s first draft in 1998 and piqued the interest of Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams as early as 2004. The two actors are executive pro-ducers of the final product and each approaches the material with the utmost seriousness.

The raw richness of Dean and Cindy bring each actor’s re-spective careers to an important turning point. We’ve known for a while that Gosling and Williams are two of the most talented actors of their generation, but their dedication to Blue Valentine is something unique. Enriched by time, their understanding of these characters urges us to better under-stand ourselves and ache for the restoration of all that has been lost.

Film FeatureSCREEN

By Phillip Johnston, Pulse Film Critic

Love and Its Loss in Blue Valentine

Blue ValentineDirected by Derek CianfranceStarring Michelle Williams, Ryan GoslingRated RRunning time: 1 hour, 54 minutes

“I would suggest that Blue Valentine is not a film about marriage, but a simple story about two young people who have not yet come to see themselves as limited.”


Those with even the slightest amount of knowledge of the occult are no strangers to the legends sur-rounding the crystal skulls. The sto-ries claim that these hand-carved skulls, thought to have originated sometime during the Aztec and Ma-yan civilizations, can induce pro-phetic visions and hallucinations, cure disease and even kill or maim. Others say the skulls represent an extra-terrestrial intelligence.

At Riley’s Wine and Spirits on Hix-son Pike in Hixson, “Crystal Skulls” means “Crystal Head”, which means premium vodka and is also this week’s Great Buy. In “Great Buys”, Riley’s picks something special from the area’s largest (and favorite—we’re #1) selection of adult bev-erages from around the world and then shares it with Chattanooga’s readers of The Pulse. Crystal Head Vodka celebrates all the different legends surrounding the crystal skulls. It is packaged in a glass skull and distributed by Diamond Estate Spirits, where actor Dan Aykroyd is a co-founder.

Vodka is a clear, distilled alcohol-ic beverage and the most popular adult beverage in the world. It’s composed mostly of H2O and etha-nol and fermented from grain, pota-toes and even grapes. Vodka was first seen during the 11th century in the grain-growing area that is now Poland, where it was used as a medicine named “Gorzalka”. Three hundred years later, during the 14th century, it surfaced in Russia at the royal court where a prince mistook it for wine. Understandable, as this particular version was distilled from grapes! Several years later a Rus-sian monk distilled the clear spirit with grain and called it vodka—or “bread wine”.

Vodka hasn’t always been the popular drink it is today; in fact, its versatility in mixed drinks wasn’t discovered until shortly after World War II in California when a restau-rateur in Los Angeles with excess

ginger ale mixed that along with vodka and limejuice into what is called a “Moscow Mule.” The drink was a huge success with the restau-rant’s customers (who happened to be stars of the silver screen). They then spread vodka’s newfound mix-ability from coast to coast. Since the 1950s, vodka has seen a steady increase in worldwide sales year af-ter year.

Crystal Head comes packaged in a neat glass replica of a crystal skull with a cork wrapped in real wood. Once the vodka is opened. you will immediately notice its sweet ethanol aroma that only emanates from higher-end vodkas. Once it’s in your mouth, you’ll think it’s wa-ter—until you notice a cool burn on your tongue reminiscent of a flavor-less mouthwash. After swallowing, you’ll notice a slightly sweet, sugary aftertaste. Crystal Head Vodka is meant to be drunk straight up, but if you must mix it, use sweet mix-ers, such as fruit juice, to comple-ment its sweet aftertaste. Bottom line: Well worth the extra $5—ranks right up there with the world’s finest premium vodkas.

Crystal Head is available at Riley’s in two sizes: 750mL for $48.99 plus tax or 1.75L (Big Head) for $93.99 plus tax.

Legend of the Crystal SkullRiley's Spirits WithinWINE & SPIRITS

By Joshua Hurley, Riley's Wine & Spirits

www.chattanoogapulse.com | February 3, 2011 | Vol. 8, Issue 5 | The Pulse 29Crossword created By Matt Jones. © 2011 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #0505.

Jonesin' Crossword & Rob Brezsny's Free Will AstrologyENTERTAINMENT

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): The renegade spiritual sect known as the Church of the Subgenius values one treasure above all others: not salvation, not enlightenment, not holiness, but rather Slack. And what is Slack? It is a state of being in which everything flows smoothly—a frame of mind so unfettered and at ease that the entire universe just naturally cooperates with you. When you’ve got abundant reserves of Slack, you don’t strain and struggle to make de-sired events unfold, and you don’t crave things you don’t really need. You’re surrendered to the greater intelligence that guides your life, and it provides you with a knack for attracting only what’s truly satisfying. Happy Slack Week, Aquarius! I suspect you will have loads of that good stuff, which means your freedom to be your authentic self will be at a peak.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Everybody gets so much information all day long that they lose their common sense,” said writer Gertrude Stein many decades ago. Isn’t that about a thousand times truer in 2011? It takes rigor-ous concentration not to be inundated with data. But that’s exactly your assignment, Pisces. It’s absolutely crucial for you to be a beacon of common sense in the coming days. To meet your dates with destiny, you will have to be earthy, uncluttered, well-grounded, and in close touch with your body’s intuition. If that requires you to cut back dramati-cally on the volume of information you take in, so be it.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Now and then, members of other astrological signs complain that I seem to favor you Aries above them. If that’s true, I’m certainly not aware of it. As far as I know, I love all the signs equally. I will say this, however: Due to the idiosyncrasies of my own per-sonal horoscope, I have been working for years to get more skilled at expressing qualities that your tribe tends to excel at: being direct, acting fearless, knowing exactly what you want, cultivating a willingness to change, and leading by ex-ample. All these assets are especially needed by the people in your life right now.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): I’ve found that even when people are successful in dealing with a long-term, intrac-table problem, they rarely zap it out of existence in one epic swoop. Generally they chip away at it, dismantling it little by little; they gradually break its hold with incre-mental bursts of unspectacular heroism. Judging from the astrological omens, though, I’d say that you Tauruses are ripe for a large surge of dismantling. An obstacle you’ve been hammering away at for months or even years may be primed to crumble dramatically.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): My brother Tom and I used to be on a softball team in Santa Cruz. I played third base and he was the pitcher. For one game he showed up with a new glove that still had the price tag dangling. I asked him if he was going to snip it off. “Nope,” he said. “It’ll subtly distract the batters and give me an advantage.” That day he pitched one of his best games ever. His pitches seemed to have extra mojo that kept the hitters off-balance. Were they even aware they were being messed with? I don’t think so. In fact, my theory is that because Tom’s trick was so in-nocuous, no one on the opposing team registered the fact that it was affecting their concentration. I suggest you try a similar strategy, Gemini.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): A famous atheist named Edwin Kagin has incorporated performance art into his crusade against religious believers. Wielding a hairdryer, he “de-baptizes” ex-church-goers who want to reverse the effects of the baptism they experienced as children. The stream of hot air that Kagin blows against their foreheads is meant to exorcise the holy water daubed there way back when. Could you benefit from a similar ritual, Cancerian? If you have any inclinations to free yourself from early im-prints, religious or otherwise, you’re in a favorable phase to do so.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In an old Star Trek episode, a woman visits the starship’s medical facility seeking chemi-cals she needs to start a hydroponic garden. The chief doc-tor, who has a high sense of self-worth and a gruff bedside manner, scowls at her. Why is she bothering him with such a trivial request? “Now I know how Hippocrates felt,” he complains, “when the King needed him to trim a hangnail.” (Ancient Greek physician Hippocrates is referred to as the “Father of Medicine” because of his seminal influence on the healing professions.) I suspect that sometime soon, Leo, you will be in a position similar to the ship’s doctor. Unlike him, however, you should carry out the assignment with consummate grace. It’ll pay off for you in the long run—probably in ways you can’t imagine right now.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In Leonard Cohen’s song “Anthem,” he sings “There is a crack in everything / That’s how the light gets in.” From what I can tell, Virgo, the week ahead will be one of the best times all year for welcoming the light that comes through the cracks. In fact, I urge you to consider widening the cracks a little—maybe even split-ting open a few new cracks -- so that the wildly healing light can pour down on you in profusion.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): When was the last time you created a masterpiece, Libra? I’m not necessarily talking about a work of art; it might have been an exquisite dinner you prepared for people you love…or a temporary alliance you forged that allowed you to accomplish the impossible…or a scary-fun adventure you risked that turned you into a riper human being with a more authoritative standing. Whether your last tour de force happened seven weeks ago or seven months ago, my sense is that you’re due for an-other one. The cosmic rhythms are conspiring to make you act like an artful genius.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Why is everything so eerily quiescent right now? Should you be worried? Has the mo-mentum been sucked out of your life? Have you lost your way? Personally, I think you’re doing better than you real-ize. The dormancy is a temporary illusion. To help give you the perspective you need, I offer you this haiku-like poem by Imma von Bodmershof, translated by Petra Engelbert: “The great river is silent / only sometimes it sounds quietly / deep under the ice.”

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): I saw ex-Poet Laureate Robert Hass read and discuss his poem “Etymology.” He said that while many of the fluids of the human body are named with English words, at least one isn’t: the moisture of a woman who is sexually aroused. The Anglo-Saxons did have a word for it, he noted: silm, which also referred to the look of moonlight on the water. “Poor language,” Hass concluded, bemoaning a vocabulary that ignores such an important part of human experience. Your assignment, Sagittarius, is to correct for any problems caused by poor language in your own sphere. If you’ve been lazy about ar-ticulating your meaning or needs, then please activate your deeper intelligence. If there’s a situation in your life that’s suffering from a sloppy use of words, reframe its contours with crisper speech. You could even coin some new words or borrow good ones from foreign tongues.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Stand-up comedian Arj Barker says that when he writes each of his jokes, he’s thinking that all he needs to do is make it funny enough to get at least three people in the audience to laugh at it. More than three is gravy, and he hopes he does get more. But if he can just get those three, he believes, he will always get a lot of work in his chosen profession. In accordance with the astrological rhythms, Capricorn, I urge you to adopt a similar approach. To be successful in the coming days, you don’t need an approval rating of 80 percent.

Across1 One who likes to talk7 Does some unwanted yard redecoration?10 Feature of some high-tech cell phones13 Company hawked by Catherine Zeta-Jones14 “___ you kidding?”15 Necklace given upon deplanings16 Another term for it is “elver”17 He wrote about Mowgli19 “___ Out of Control” (Tony Danza movie)20 Morrissey video compilation that trans-lates to “Listen, Steven”22 “Top Chef” host Lakshmi24 Joltin’ Joe’s other nickname25 Addis ___, Ethiopia28 Actress Summer of “The Cape”32 Nine-to-five friends38 “___ been a bad boy”39 Beatnik interjection

40 River island41 1977 role for George Burns42 It’s heard while leav-ing a group46 Unit of loudness47 R&B group Bell Biv ___48 Throw back in52 “Dynasty” actress Emma56 Grain byproduct used in alternative medicines61 Modern waltz violin-ist Andre62 Square-shaped flyer63 It usually involves reading letters65 Suffix for “cyan”66 “The Girl You Lost to Cocaine” singer67 Pre-show acts68 Spider egg container69 Network advertising “the greatest motion pictures of all time”70 Cliff Huxtable’s oldest

Down1 Mutual of ___2 Like Supreme Court judges3 Lower than low4 One may attempt to break it5 Spread across the Eastern seaboard?6 Depend (on)7 George of “Star Trek”8 Rainbow maker9 Places for some nose piercings, technically10 Silver-tongued11 Actress Elizabeth in “The Incredibles”12 Part of ASL13 Abbr. in a recipe18 Like pin-up models21 Cheese in a red rind23 Mushroom cloud maker26 Out of the office27 “Molto ___” (“very good,” in Verona)29 Interlockable toy30 “___ Flux”31 Arne Duncan’s employer, for short

32 Newton fillers33 Rachael Ray acro-nym34 Kings of ___35 Fix some potholes36 “Salt” actor Schreiber37 Others, in Spanish43 Leader of The Dominos44 Old Icelandic saga45 Like some auto clearance sales49 Be50 Upper story51 It might involve flying or unfamiliar situations53 Social dance54 Ben Stiller’s mom Anne55 Total packages?56 Diamond stat, in-correctly but commonly57 Talks like this he does58 Business big shot59 Business big shots60 Wrong letter?64 Suffix for “velvet”


Dear Mexican, My gabacho friends look at me askance for

being a gabacho who enjoys mariachi music. They, and even some of my Mexican friends, run and hide when I go a step further and start listening to the mournful ballads of Vicente Fernandez, backed up by—you guessed it—a mariachi band. Not that the music of my Highlands ancestors is any more special: those folks got their jollies blowing into a bag with many pipes sticking out that made the sound of multiple cats in heat. I’ve noticed that the number and type of instruments used in mariachi bands and the costuming of the players is quite exact each and every time, showing little variation. This leads me to ask, and hopefully you can inform me and your other readers: what are the origins of mariachi music and why does it enjoy such popularity? — Bonnie Prince Gabacho

Dear Thrifty Gabacho,Simple, really—the roots are from the Mexi-

can state of Jalisco, which I’ve noted before in this column plays the role of Texas in the Mexi-can cultural imagination. It’s an overstatement to say mariachi shows little variation, though. The instruments usually stick to various arrange-ments of trumpets, violins, a guitar, a guitarrón (that fat guitar that players pluck at with the ferocity of an upright bass and that Ameri-can culture has relegated to a fat man), and a vihuela and can come in arrangements as small as four men or as large as an orchestra. The costumes, while always drawing from Jalisco’s charro tradition, also wildly vary, while the music they interpret span Mexico’s regions—they can play cumbias, rancheras, polkas, mambos, even “The Devil Went Down to Georgia.” Historians date the beginnings of mariachi to the era of Emperor Maximilian, but its international popu-larity only to the 1940s, when Mexico’s leaders decided to (answer continued on page 73 of my ¡Ask a Mexican! book, paperback edición). Dear Mexican,

In Switzerland they have (or maybe had—I haven’t checked recently) a law stating that foreign workers could legally come, have families, pay tax-es, but could never acquire citizenship. That strikes me as cruel and unpleasant, but at least honest. But is that better or worse than the U.S. posi-tion of allowing workers in illegally to support the economy (and do the jobs that the great unwashed would touch never in a million years), holding out the hope of citizenship, until it becomes politically expedient to round a few up and expel them? — On the Fence

Dear Gabacho,No, you’re right on the Swiss law, along with

the laws of many other European nations that denied birthright citizenship to the children of its immigrants for decades. Such jus sanguinis laws might be ruthlessly honest, but they also created a permanent underclass maduro for the picking by terrorists, and dual societies that make our current American-Mexican problems seem downright melting-pot by comparison. And that’s why Know Nothing politicians who helped defeat the DREAM Act and now want to amend the United States Constitution to ensure children born in this country to illegal immi-grants do not automatically become American citizens don’t understand. Guest worker pro-grams don’t work—you aren’t contracting robots but rather humans who put down roots, remem-ber the opportunities of this land, and will make it their life’s goal to be part of the country. And the children, whether born here or smuggled in at a young age, will forever consider themselves American because that’s the only country they know. Yet you have so-called Americans dismiss the kiddies as “anchor babies,” and the immi-grants as invaders! This country’s assimilationist fires are too strong to create a true dual society like that which exists in Europe, but with the current Know Nothing rhetoric and politics dominating Washington, don’t be surprised next time there’s an immigrant-rights march and ev-eryone waves Mexican flags—I don’t agree with the tactic, but that logic is as understandable as Mexican men whistling at women.

Gustavo Arellano

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The Pulse - Vol. 8, Issue 5

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