Sound Transit Washington Powerpoint

Post on 18-Jan-2015

127 views 1 download

Tags:

description

This is the presentation delivered by Scott "Q" Marcus, Motivational Productivity Expert, to Sound Transit in Seattle Washington on December 16, 2013. The topic is "Ooops - I didn't mean it to come out that way" (a.k.a. How to spend more time getting what you want and less time STRESSING over what you didn’t"). Its purpose is to explain attitude, enhance communication, and provide tools for dealing with difficult people.

Transcript of Sound Transit Washington Powerpoint

Oops!I didn’t mean it to come out that way!

Scott  “Q”  MarcusCRP,  www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt1

(a.k.a “How to spend more time getting what you want

and less time STRESSING over what you didn’t.”)

Wednesday, December 18, 13

2

What You’re Looking For

Wednesday, December 18, 13

2

What You’re Looking For

Speaking to Groups28%

Understand Attitude17%

Persuasive13%

Difficult People19%

General Knowledge23%

Wednesday, December 18, 13

3

Your Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

3

Your Attitude

Pretty Good69%

Extremely Upbeat10%

Average19%

Below Average1%

79%

Wednesday, December 18, 13

3

Your Attitude

Pretty Good69%

Extremely Upbeat10%

Average19%

Below Average1%

79%(57%)

Wednesday, December 18, 13

2

Co-Workers’

4

Pretty Good49%

Extremely Upbeat3%

Average36%

Below Average10%

Extremely Poor1%

52%

Wednesday, December 18, 13

2

Co-Workers’

4

Pretty Good49%

Extremely Upbeat3%

Average36%

Below Average10%

Extremely Poor1%

52%(50%)

Wednesday, December 18, 13

25

Others’

Extremely Upbeat1%

Pretty Good30%

Average57%

Below Average12%

31%

Wednesday, December 18, 13

25

Others’

Extremely Upbeat1%

Pretty Good30%

Average57%

Below Average12%

31%(36%)

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Albert Mehrabian [Nonverbal Communication (Chicago: Aldine-Atherton, 1972)]

Non Verbal55%

Use of Voice38%

Verbal7%

Attitude Talks

6

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Albert Mehrabian [Nonverbal Communication (Chicago: Aldine-Atherton, 1972)]

Non Verbal55%

Use of Voice38%

Verbal7%

Attitude Talks

6

93%

Wednesday, December 18, 13

7

Perceptions

Wednesday, December 18, 13

7

Perceptions

Wednesday, December 18, 13

7

Perceptions

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

9

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

9

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Talks

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Attitude

“Complex interaction between feelings and beliefs that affect how we react to our environment.”

14

Wednesday, December 18, 13

15

Honest Attitude Prayer

Wednesday, December 18, 13

15

So far today, God, I've done all right.

I haven't gossiped, haven't lost my

temper, haven't been greedy,

grumpy, nasty, selfish, over-

indulgent, or told anyone to mind

their own business and stay out of

mine.

I'm really glad about that!…

Honest Attitude Prayer

Wednesday, December 18, 13

15

But, in a few minutes, God,

I'm going to get out of bed,

and from then on I'm

probably going to need a lot

more help.

Honest Attitude Prayer

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

16

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

16

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

16

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

I  bet  living  in  a  nudist  colony  takes  all  the  fun  out  of  Halloween.  -­‐Age  13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Examples of Attitude 17

Wednesday, December 18, 13

What Causes Attitude?

18

Wednesday, December 18, 13

What Causes Attitude?

1. Training (4.1) - tie

1. Management (4.1) - tie

1. Workload (4.1) - tie

18

4. Health (4.0)

5. Home Life (3.8)

Wednesday, December 18, 13

What Keeps You Awake

ZZZZZZZ...

Other

State of World

Family

Health

Job

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Trend

20

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Trend

20

Training has Improved 3.0

More Results 3.2

Increased Workload 4.1

Management has Improved 2.9

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Beliefs

21

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Attitude Beliefs

21

It’s My Choice 3.2

Learned 4.0

Controllable 4.6

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Plan

22

Attitude Cycle

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Plan

22

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Plan

22

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Willpower

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Plan

22

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Behaviors

Willpower

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Plan

22

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Behaviors

Results

Willpower

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Plan

22

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Behaviors

Results

Feelings

Willpower

Wednesday, December 18, 13

223

How We Deal With Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

223

How We Deal With Attitude

Other

Enlist Others

Make Jokes

Supervisor

“Get Over it!”

Ask to Help

Ignore

Pretend

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Zebra Rule

24

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Zebra Rule

24

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The Zebra Rule

24

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com25

Six-PointPlan

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com25

Six-PointPlan

1. What drives you “nuts”?

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com25

Six-PointPlan

1. What drives you “nuts”?

2. Why does it bother you?

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com25

Six-PointPlan

1. What drives you “nuts”?

2. Why does it bother you?

3. How do you feel when you’re “nuts”?

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com25

Six-PointPlan

1. What drives you “nuts”?

2. Why does it bother you?

3. How do you feel when you’re “nuts”?

4. What positive feelings would you prefer?

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com25

Six-PointPlan

1. What drives you “nuts”?

2. Why does it bother you?

3. How do you feel when you’re “nuts”?

4. What positive feelings would you prefer?

5. When do you feel that ?

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com25

Six-PointPlan

1. What drives you “nuts”?

2. Why does it bother you?

3. How do you feel when you’re “nuts”?

4. What positive feelings would you prefer?

5. When do you feel that ?

6. What do you need to do to feel that right now?

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com26

Making Sense of It All

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com26

LogicalPhysical

Emotional

Spiritual

< Activity! Inspiration >

< Execution Creation >

Making Sense of It All

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com26

LogicalPhysical

<<<<Change

Emotional

Spiritual

< Activity! Inspiration >

< Execution Creation >

Making Sense of It All

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com26

LogicalPhysical

<<<<Change

Emotional

Spiritual

< Activity! Inspiration >

< Execution Creation >

Making Sense of It All

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com27

Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com27

Attitude

Feelings Beliefs

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com28

Feelings

Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com28

Feelings

Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com28

Feelings

Experience(Observations)

Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com28

Feelings

Experience(Observations)

Biology

Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com28

Response

Feelings

Experience(Observations)

Biology

Attitude

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

29

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

29

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

29

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Conflict Cycle

30

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Conflict Cycle

30

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Conflict Cycle CALM

30

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

CALM

30

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Noise

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

CALM

30

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Noise

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

Resolution

CALM

30

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Noise

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

Resolution

Follow Up

CALM

30

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

31

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

31

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

31

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Reasons for Conflict

32

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Reasons for Conflict

•Shoulds

•Disqualifying

•Inappropriate Rescue

•Perfectionism

•Boundary Violation

•Selective Viewing

32

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Selective Viewing

33

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your Pet Peeves

34

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your Pet Peeves

Dishonest

Innapproriate

Bad Attitude

Poor Hygiene

Bossy

Gossips

4.8

3.9

3.8

3.8

3.6

3.6

34

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Conflict Styles

35 Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Conflict Styles

35

•firecracker•cold shoulder•backstabber

•memory lane•social zinger•last word

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Most Disliked Communication Styles

36

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Most Disliked Communication Styles

Backstabber

Just sayin...

Firecracker

Cold Shoulder

Memory Lane

Last Word

4.5

3.7

3.4

3.3

3.3

3.1

36

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your Style

37

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your Style

Last Word15%

Memory Lane20%

Cold Shoulder19%

Firecracker17% Just sayin...

13%

Backstabber17%

37

Wednesday, December 18, 13

38

The Five Year Rule

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Wednesday, December 18, 13

38

The Five Year Rule

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Will anybody know or

care about this event five years from now?

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

InnappropriateRescue

39

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

InnappropriateRescue

39

• Can I help?

• Want my help?

• Do I want to help?

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com40

Appropriate Questions

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com40

Appropriate Questions

Open

Closed Confirmation

Inquiry

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

41

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

41

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Video

41

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The 3 Rs

42

• Recognize

• Reflect

• Redirect

Recognize

Reflect

Redirect

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The 3 Rs

42

• Recognize

• Reflect

• Redirect

Recognize

Reflect

Redirect

Example:

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

The 3 Rs

42

I appreciate ____.

However when you do that, I feel ____.

What I’d really like is ___________.

Recognize

Reflect

Redirect

Example:

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Disarming

43

Think “LAST”

L isten

A pologize (Acknowledge)

S olve

T hank

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Disarming

43

L

A

S

T

Think “LAST”

L isten

A pologize (Acknowledge)

S olve

T hank

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com44

Most Powerful Word

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com44

Most Powerful Word

WOWWednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com45

Tying it All Together

Wednesday, December 18, 13

1. In

tent

ion

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com45

Tying it All Together

2. Pr

iming

3. Q

uesti

oning

4. Li

stenin

g

5. C

larify

ing

6. Su

gges

ting

7. T

hank

ing

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com46

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com46

• Begin with “I”• No Interruptions

• No Denials• No Cross Complaints

Fair Fighting

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Talk Time

•10-20 Minutes•I like

•Please change•Get agreement

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Staying the Course

48

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

• Positive Intention

Staying the Course

48

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

• Positive Intention

• Always a Choice

Staying the Course

48

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

• Positive Intention

• Always a Choice

• Feedback,not Failure

Staying the Course

48

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

• Positive Intention

• Always a Choice

• Feedback,not Failure

Staying the Course

48

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

• Positive Intention

• Always a Choice

• Feedback,not Failure

• Have the Tools

Staying the Course

48

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Keeping it Going

49

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Keeping it Going

Do 1 Thing

49

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Keeping it Going

Do 1 ThingMake it Small

49

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Keeping it Going

Do 1 ThingMake it SmallFocus on Today

49

Think“1st”

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Scott  “Q”  MarcusCRP,  www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt

Scott  “Q”  MarcusCRP,  www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt

50

Wednesday, December 18, 13

Oops!I didn’t mean it to come out that way!

Scott  “Q”  MarcusCRP,  www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt

Scott  “Q”  MarcusCRP,  www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt

Scott would love to work with YOU:

• Trainings• Webinars• Workshops • Keynotes• Coaching

Contact him for more information

50

Wednesday, December 18, 13