Sound Transit Washington Powerpoint

Oops!I didn’t mean it to come out that way!

Scott “Q” MarcusCRP, www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt1

(a.k.a “How to spend more time getting what you want

and less time STRESSING over what you didn’t.”)

Wednesday, December 18, 13

What You’re Looking For

Speaking to Groups28%

Understand Attitude17%

Persuasive13%

Difficult People19%

General Knowledge23%

Your Attitude

Pretty Good69%

Extremely Upbeat10%

Average19%

Below Average1%

Your Attitude

Pretty Good69%

Extremely Upbeat10%

Average19%

Below Average1%

79%(57%)

Co-Workers’

Pretty Good49%

Extremely Upbeat3%

Average36%

Below Average10%

Extremely Poor1%

Co-Workers’

Pretty Good49%

Extremely Upbeat3%

Average36%

Below Average10%

Extremely Poor1%

52%(50%)

Others’

Extremely Upbeat1%

Pretty Good30%

Average57%

Below Average12%

Others’

Extremely Upbeat1%

Pretty Good30%

Average57%

Below Average12%

31%(36%)

Albert Mehrabian [Nonverbal Communication (Chicago: Aldine-Atherton, 1972)]

Non Verbal55%

Use of Voice38%

Verbal7%

Attitude Talks

Albert Mehrabian [Nonverbal Communication (Chicago: Aldine-Atherton, 1972)]

Non Verbal55%

Use of Voice38%

Verbal7%

Attitude Talks

Perceptions

Attitude Talks

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Attitude

“Complex interaction between feelings and beliefs that affect how we react to our environment.”

Honest Attitude Prayer

So far today, God, I've done all right.

I haven't gossiped, haven't lost my

temper, haven't been greedy,

grumpy, nasty, selfish, over-

indulgent, or told anyone to mind

their own business and stay out of

I'm really glad about that!…

But, in a few minutes, God,

I'm going to get out of bed,

and from then on I'm

probably going to need a lot

more help.

Examples of Attitude 17

I bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween. -‐Age 13

What Causes Attitude?

1. Training (4.1) - tie

1. Management (4.1) - tie

1. Workload (4.1) - tie

4. Health (4.0)

5. Home Life (3.8)

What Keeps You Awake

ZZZZZZZ...

State of World

Family

Health

Attitude Trend

Training has Improved 3.0

More Results 3.2

Increased Workload 4.1

Management has Improved 2.9

Attitude Beliefs

It’s My Choice 3.2

Learned 4.0

Controllable 4.6

The Plan

Attitude Cycle

The Plan

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

The Plan

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Willpower

The Plan

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Behaviors

Willpower

The Plan

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Behaviors

Results

Willpower

The Plan

Attitude Cycle

Attitude

Behaviors

Results

Feelings

Willpower

How We Deal With Attitude

Enlist Others

Make Jokes

Supervisor

“Get Over it!”

Ask to Help

Ignore

Pretend

The Zebra Rule

Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com25

Six-PointPlan

1. What drives you “nuts”?

Six-PointPlan

2. Why does it bother you?

Six-PointPlan

3. How do you feel when you’re “nuts”?

Six-PointPlan

4. What positive feelings would you prefer?

Six-PointPlan

5. When do you feel that ?

Six-PointPlan

5. When do you feel that ?

6. What do you need to do to feel that right now?

Making Sense of It All

LogicalPhysical

Emotional

Spiritual

< Activity! Inspiration >

< Execution Creation >

LogicalPhysical

<<<<Change

Emotional

Spiritual

LogicalPhysical

<<<<Change

Emotional

Spiritual

Attitude

Feelings Beliefs

Feelings

Attitude

Feelings

Attitude

Feelings

Experience(Observations)

Attitude

Feelings

Biology

Attitude

Response

Feelings

Biology

Attitude

Conflict Cycle

Conflict Cycle CALM

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

Resolution

Conflict Cycle

Expectations

Resolution

Follow Up

Reasons for Conflict

•Shoulds

•Disqualifying

•Inappropriate Rescue

•Perfectionism

•Boundary Violation

•Selective Viewing

Selective Viewing

Your Pet Peeves

Dishonest

Innapproriate

Bad Attitude

Poor Hygiene

Gossips

Conflict Styles

35 Your comments are welcomed: scottq@scottqmarcus.com • www.ThisTimeIMeantIt.com

Conflict Styles

•firecracker•cold shoulder•backstabber

•memory lane•social zinger•last word

Most Disliked Communication Styles

Backstabber

Just sayin...

Firecracker

Cold Shoulder

Memory Lane

Last Word

Your Style

Last Word15%

Memory Lane20%

Cold Shoulder19%

Firecracker17% Just sayin...

Backstabber17%

The Five Year Rule

Will anybody know or

care about this event five years from now?

InnappropriateRescue

• Can I help?

• Want my help?

• Do I want to help?

Appropriate Questions

Closed Confirmation

Inquiry

The 3 Rs

• Recognize

• Reflect

• Redirect

Recognize

Reflect

Redirect

The 3 Rs

• Recognize

• Reflect

• Redirect

Recognize

Reflect

Redirect

Example:

The 3 Rs

I appreciate ____.

However when you do that, I feel ____.

What I’d really like is ___________.

Recognize

Reflect

Redirect

Example:

Disarming

Think “LAST”

L isten

A pologize (Acknowledge)

S olve

T hank

Disarming

Think “LAST”

L isten

A pologize (Acknowledge)

S olve

T hank

Most Powerful Word

WOWWednesday, December 18, 13

Tying it All Together

stenin

larify

• Begin with “I”• No Interruptions

• No Denials• No Cross Complaints

Fair Fighting

Talk Time

•10-20 Minutes•I like

•Please change•Get agreement

Staying the Course

• Positive Intention

Staying the Course

• Always a Choice

Staying the Course

• Always a Choice

• Feedback,not Failure

Staying the Course

• Always a Choice

Staying the Course

• Always a Choice

• Have the Tools

Staying the Course

Keeping it Going

Do 1 Thing

Keeping it Going

Do 1 ThingMake it Small

Keeping it Going

Do 1 ThingMake it SmallFocus on Today

Think“1st”

Scott “Q” MarcusCRP, www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt

Oops!I didn’t mean it to come out that way!

Scott “Q” MarcusCRP, www.ThisTimeIMeanIt.com707.442.6243Facebook.com/ThisTimeIMeanIt@ThisTimeIMeanIt

Scott would love to work with YOU:

• Trainings• Webinars• Workshops • Keynotes• Coaching

Contact him for more information

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