The 10 Afflictions of

the Egyptians A rhymeC Levin

When it was that we were slavesThe Pharaohs worked us to our gravesWhen Moshe asked for our releaseThe burden instead he bade: ‘Increase!’So Moshe said ‘I won’t be vagueLet us out or get a plague.’There formed a cloudy rouge miasmaThe waterway to bright red plasma Those who worked in potamology,Were soon referred to haematology.

So Moshe asked, ‘Please free us Yids.’The answer was, ‘Build pyramids!’Moshe warned, ‘No time for jokesYou’re going to hear a lot of croaks.You won’t think it too remoteWhen one of them sticks in your throat!’That silly neighbour of the LibyansWas overwhelmed- amphibians.

But after this he would not relentThe Israelites did not get sent.‘For this next one you are no match.So let us go or you will scratch,And scratch and scratch and itch and hurtVia little creatures from the dirt.Horrid wiggly anopluraAre you, big king, a pain endurer?’Pharaoh rebuffed the Jewish plaguerAnd then was chewed by mallophaga.They swarmed upon them all with zestFor hair and armpits to infest.

Above Pharaoh’s screams they had to shout,‘Just let the enslaved Jews get out!’But that man had a solid chinHe wouldn’t let the message in.Because he would not let them freeHis land became a menagerie.A trip to the zoo you may highly rateWithout temptation to reciprocate.The wildest ones, you may presumeWill look for something to consume.So heart and mind with fear enmeshAs they popped by for a bit of flesh.At Pharaoh’s folk they clawed and chewedWith bestial fear they were imbued.

‘Please let us go,’ we did instruct.But that iron will would not be bucked.And in return for our non-releaseDomestic stocks would now decrease.The livestock felled in tides torrentialOf maladies most pestilential.And no amount of veterinarian feesCould combat the onslaught of disease.That stubborn king would not relentDespite these matters pestilent.He could not see it as divineThe wilting flocks, insane bovine.

Again Moshe‘s approach rebuffed!Pharaoh, well, he huffed and puffed.He growled and grunted, started to poutHe simply wouldn’t let us outSo this time as if his arm to twistA poser for the dermatologist.For all Egyptian skin inflictedThen movement and their rest restrictedPainful spots upon their faces,Chests and legs (and other places).For though the ache could soon abateHe wouldn’t deign to liberate.

Now that divinely hardened heartHad been quite solid since the start.That heart would not become enlargedAnd thus the Jews were not discharged.Then from beneath the firmamentA new surprise was heaven-sent.Some balls of icy conflagrationRained solid down on Pharaoh’s nationTo smash each home and crop and fieldTo try and make that tyrant yield.

But for that king was no relenting.He wouldn’t lean towards repenting.To liberty’s cause he would not warmSo the Lord sent him a hefty swarmTo tackle agriculture’s sectorFamished brutes of class insecta.They consumed all till none was leftAnd thus of food they were bereft.

The next round of talks soon broke down(It happens in that part of town).To let us go he was almost frightenedBut he thought himself indeed enlightened.Evading and denying he obfuscatedSo access to light was confiscated.For seeing now was far beyond trickyThe atmosphere, extremely sticky.Not merely was vision out of the questionEven moving was beyond suggestion.It must have been hard as one of thoseTrapped in this state without repose.

For his final refusal to negotiateThe terms on which to liberateA special warning to all ensuedA danger for the first issued.At midnight there’d be a rendezvousFrom which first borns would not get throughSome shocks indeed were to be hadWe count this first born to the dad!For if younger offspring and their ilkWere first to the guy who delivered milk!Then was discovered in the panic and hasteThat a strong point of Egypt was not being chaste.

Thus Pharaoh most intractableLost his slaves against his will.

The end (for Egypt, but for us, the beginning!)