SPI 236 Secrets and Science to ... - Smart Passive Income · Pat: This is the Smart Passive Income...

SPI 236

Secrets and Science to Living the Good Lifewith Jonathan Fields

October 19, 2016

Show NoteS: http://www.smartpassiveincome.com/session236

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Pat: ThisistheSmartPassiveIncomePodcastwithPatFlynn,Session

Number236.Yougood?Good?Okay,let’sgo.

Announcer: WelcometotheSmartPassiveIncomePodcast,whereit’sallabout

workinghardnow,soyoucansitbackandreapthebenefitslater,

andnowyourhost.Hisdadjokesaregettingbetterwithevery

minute,PatFlynn.

Pat: What’sup,everybody?PatFlynnhere.Thankyousomuchfor

joiningmetoday.I’msostokedtowelcomeagoodfriendofmine,

andI’mjustverythankfulthatheismyfriend,becauseforthe

longesttimehewasjustoneofthosementors,somebodywhoI

hadlookeduptoforawhile,whoIneverthoughtI’dbeableto

haveaccessto.Tohavehimcomeontheshowtodayisjusta

specialtreatforme,andforyouguystoo,becausehe’samazing.

HisnameisJonathanFields,andIwasfirstintroducedtohimway

backwhenIwasstartingoutinonlinebusiness.Hewasoneof

thosepeoplethatwereonthesamelevel,tome,asTimFerrisand

GaryVaynerchuk.IjusthadseenJonathanFieldsthere,andhe

hadalwaystakenadifferentapproachfromthoseother2guys.

Hewastheguythatwasalwaysaboutmindfulnessandreally

understandingwhatthepurposeisinyourlife.Likeme,heisa

familymanaswell,andthat’swhatIreallyrespectedabouthim.To

nowhavebecomefriendswithhimandtohavehimontheshowis

justsuchagreattreat,andI’mjustsohappythathe’shere.

Todaywe’regoingtobetalkingabouthisnewbook,whichiscalled

HowtoLiveaGoodLife.Iknowthatsoundslike,“Oh,well,whoare

youtotellmewhatagoodlifeis?”Hebreaksitdowninavery,very

interesting,buteasy-to-understandway,andwe’llalsotalkabout

hisGoodLifeProject,whichishispodcastandhisvideopodcast,

andhisserieswhereheinterviewstheseamazingpeopleandgets

tounderstand,“Well,howaretheyabletolivethelifethattheywant

tolive?”Wearegoingtogetintoallthatstuffrightnow,sowithout

furtherado,hereisJonathanFields,fromGoodLifeProject.com.

What’sup,everybody?I’msohappytowelcomesomebodywho

http://www.smartpassiveincome.com/

http://smartpassiveincome.com/session236


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I’vebeenlookinguptoforyearsnow,andIjustsothankfulhe’son

theshowwithustoday.ThisisJonathanFields.Jonathan,thank

youforcomingontheshow.

Jonathan: It’smypleasure,man.Thankssomuchforhavingme.

Pat: I’veknownyouforquiteawhile.Iwasactuallyveryinspiredbya

TEDTalkyoudidalongtimeagoaboutfearandhowwecanall

usefearasfuelfortheprojectsthatwe’redoing,andyoutoldthis

amazingstory.You’resuchagreatstorytellerandyou’rewonderful

onstage.

Sincethen,you’vecreatedsomethingcalledtheGoodLifeProject,

whichiswherealotofpeopleknowyoufromnow.Canyoutalka

littlebitaboutwhattheGLPis,andwhatitstandsfor?

Jonathan: Yeah.GoodLifeProjectreallystartedasanoutgrowthofjustmy

ownpersonaldeepfascinationwithhumanpotential,withwhatit

actuallytakestolivewellintheworld,andI’vebeenonthatjourney

fordecades,forthebetterpartofmylife;Iturned50lastyear.

Pat: Congrats.

Jonathan: Thanks,andsoI’vejustbeenreallytryingtofigureitout,whatare

thebiglevers?Whatmakesthebiggestdifferenceinourtimeon

theplanet,andwhat’sallthestuffthatreallydoesn’tmatter?How

canIlearnfromthepeoplethatareactuallyembodyingthisand

thenturnaroundandsimplify,streamline,andsharewhateveritis

thatI’mlearning?

TheGoodLifeProject,theactualventure,startedin2012.Actually,

italmoststartedasafluke.Iwaswritingmyyear-endrecappost

asabloggerandthatturnedintothis40-pagedesignedannual

report.Attheendofthat,Iteasedthesethingscalledmy10

CommandmentsofBusiness,whichisjustanalternativeway

thatIlookatbuildingbusiness,atdoingentrepreneurshipand

contributingtotheworld.IthenteasedthisthingcalledtheGood

LifeProject,whichsaidwascoming,andhonestlywasn’tentirely




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surewhatitwasgoingtobebackthen,butIknewIwantedto

createsomethingaroundit.

Thosethings,bothThe10Commandments,andtheideaofthe

GoodLifeProjecttookoffonline.Weactuallystartedbybuilding

theeducationalsideoftheventureandthenbuiltaroundthat

mediawithvideos,andtheneventuallyapodcast,andthencourses

andevents,andnowreallyabeautiful,flourishingglobalcommunity

ofpeoplewhoarereallyleaningdeepintotheexplorationofwhatit

meanstoreallylivewellintheworld.

Pat: WhatIloveabouttheGoodLifeProjectisit’snotjustthereforgood

andforthegoodofothers;it’ssowelldone.Thequalityisamazing.

OutofallthevideosthatI’veseenwherepeopleareinterviewing

others,you’rearetop-notch,Iwouldsay,andsomethingtolookup

to.Whoaresomeoftheinterviewsyouremember?Whataresome

ofthemostmemorableonesforyou?

Jonathan: Thereareahandfulthathavereallystuckwithme,fordifferent

reasons.Forexample,acoupleofyearsagoIhadtheopportunity

tositdownwithsomebodynamedMiltonGlaser.What’sinteresting

abouthimisthatprettymucheverybodyknowshiswork,butunless

you’reinthedesignfieldyouprobablydon’trealizethename.

Miltonisactuallythemosticoniclivingdesigner.Heis,Ibelieve,86,

atthetimethatwe’rerecordingthis,stillmassivelyprolific,runsa

designstudioinNewYorkCity,hasmuseumshows,teaches.What

peoplemayknowhimfor,ormayknowhiswork,probablyishe’s

thecreatorofthemostripped-offlogointhehistoryoflogos,which

isIHeartNY,alongwithliterallymillionsofotherthings,andhe’s

taughtfor50years.

Thethingthatactuallyresonatedwithmeishe’sgotthisstunning

bodyofwork,butthebiggerthingthatresonatedwithmewhen

Ilefthimwasthewaythathelivedhislife,andthewaythat,not

“lived,”liveshislife,andthewaythathe’sbuilthiscareer,which

isthathecouldhavebuiltamassivedesignagency.Hecould

havegonereallybig.Hecouldhavebuiltstructure,processand




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employees,andallofthisstuff.Instead,heveryconsciouslychosea

differentpath.

Hechosetostaysmallandtobeveryselective,andtoletthework

createhisrippleintheworld,andtomovebeyondthatbyteaching,

teachinggenerationsandgenerationsofotherpeopletoseethe

worlddifferentlyandtodesignandtomakeadifference.He’shad

thisabsolutelyincredibleimpactandatthesametimekepthislife

reallyalmostexquisitelyintimateinthewaythatheliveshislife,the

waythathecontributes.Hestillhasastudiowithjustahandfulof

peoplethatheworkswithinthestudio,andhe’svery,veryselective

abouttheworkthathedoes.

Pat: Oh,man,tobeaflyonthewallathisofficetoseehowheselects

wouldbeamazing.

Jonathan: Yeah,itwassuchanincredibleconversation.Forhim,hewasoneof

thepeoplewhereIwalkedoutofthat,andthiswaswhenwewere

filming,soweactuallyfilmedthewholethingathisstudio.Iwalked

outofthereandmycrewdidn’twantittoend.Theywerelike,

“Wow,Iwishwecouldhavestayedhereallday.”Itwasalsooneof

themomentswhereIwasstruckandIwastryingtofindoutwhyI

wassostruckbyit.WhatIrealizedwasthatIlookedatthewaythat

hewasbuildinghislifeandhiscareer,andIwaslike,“Youknow

what?Iwouldstepintothat.”Thechoicesthathe’smaking,the

elevationofcraftanddevotiontofamily,andtolife,wassomething

whereitjustfeltsoalignedwiththewaythatIapproachlife.

Pat: Ilovethat,andlikeyousaidearlier,inhisworldhe’swellknown,

yethehadn’tmadethechoicetogohuge,likeallofusassumewe

havetogoinordertomakethatrippleeffect.He’sbeenabletodo

itwithhiscraftlikeyousaid.Idefinitelyhavetocheckthatout.

Iwanttogettoyourbookreallyquick.Congratulationsonyournew

book.Iwasveryfortunatetogetanadvancecopyofit.It’scalled,

HowtoLifeaGoodLife:SoulfulStories,SurprisingScience,and

PracticalWisdom.




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Thisisn’tyourfirstbook.You’vewrittenmanybooksinthepast,but

beforewegetintothecontentofthebook,Ijustwanttoknowwho

isJonathanFields,theauthorandtheentrepreneur?Ithinkpeople

whoarelisteningtothiswanttogettoknowyoualittlebitmorefirst.

Jonathan: Yeah,yeah,no,mypleasure.Fundamentally,IthinkI’macreator.I’m

somebodywho’sconstantlysearchingforandtryingtounderstand

humannature,thehumancondition,andwhatmakesitbetter.

That’sledme,forthebetterpartofmylifeonthecontributionside

ofthings,tobecomingandentrepreneur,tobecominganartistand

amaker.Iwasalemonadestandkid.I’vebeenfortunatetofound,

build,andsellahandfulofcompanies,bothbrickandmortar,and

largelyintheonlinespace.

Backin2008,actuallywhenIwasstillrunningayogacenterin

NewYorkCity…Youcantellit’sNewYorkCity,becauseyoucan

probablyhearthesirensinthebackgroundrightnow;thisis100%

authentic.Ireallystartedtodevelopadeepfascinationwiththe

craftoflanguageandwriting.IactuallysoldmyfirstbookwhileI

wasstillrunningayogastudioandteachingyoga,andgoingdeep

intoexploringthehumanconditionfromthatside,andatthesame

timewasjustjonesingonunderstandinghowtowritebetter.

Sincethen,I’veshiftedalotofmyfocusintotheworldofmediaand

writing,andcreatingtrainingsandevents,allinthenameofreally

tryingtojustdialin,focusonthisbigquestion:Whatdoesitactually

meantolivewellintheworld?

I’mfarenoughintolifenowthat…SteveJobs’famousquote,“You

lookbackandconnectthedotslookingbackwards.”Ihaveenough

dotsnowtobeabletostarttolookbackandseethatthecommon

threadinalmosteverythingthatI’vedoneisthisdeepinterestin

humanpotential,inthehumancondition.Howdowelivealife

that’sdeeplymeaningful,wherewe’revitalandalive,andwefeel

profoundlyconnectedtothosearoundus,tosomethingbiggerthan

us?That’sreallybeenthethemethatguidesme.

Also,ifyoulookatanybiothatIshare,Iprettymuchalwaysstartby




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sayingnotbooksI’vewrittenorbusinessesI’vebuilt,butbysaying

I’madadandahusband,andthat’stheheartbeatofmylife.Iknow

it’ssimilarforyou.Everythingrevolvesaroundmyabilitytojust

beapresentandengagedpersoninmyfamily,becausethat’smy

deepestlove.

Pat: Thankyouforthat.Ithinkthat’swhyyouandI,thefewtimeswe’ve

actuallymet,weconnectedreallywell,becausewehavethatsame

understandingwithwhywedowhatwedo.Whatisitaboutthis

stuffthat…Youcouldresearchallthisstuff,youcanliveit,andyou

canexperienceit,andpracticeityourself,whichyouaredoing,but

whyandwhatismakingyouwanttoteachthistoeverybodyelse?

Jonathan: It’sareallygoodquestion.It’sfunny,becauseit’sbeenaconsistent

patternforme,isthatIgointoreallycomplicatedtopics.Idodeep

researchsometimesforyears,andthenItryandsimplifythingsand

thenturnaroundandthemomentIthinkthatI’vegotsomething

that’llmakeiteasierforotherpeopletoexplore,IturnaroundandI

teachit.It’sbeenthatwayasanentrepreneurintheveryearlydays,

aseventuallyayogateacher,andasawriterandateacher.There’s

somethingaboutme,there’sateacherinme.

Yeah,Ithinkoneofthethingsthatlightsmeupistheabilitytoturn

aroundandpatternrecognize.Takeallthiscomplexstuff,distillitinto

somethingthat’salmostdeceptivelysimple,yetreallypowerful,and

thenshareitinawaythatallowspeopletostepintoitalotfaster

andmoreeffectivelythanalotoftimesthebumpsandbruisesit

tookmetogetthere.IlovetobeinaroomwhenIseethelightsgo

on,whenIseesomebodysparked.Whenaseeaflickerofpossibility

insomebody’seyestobeinaplacewhereIhavetheopportunity

tocreatethatisjust,it’skindofmagicaltome.I’mcurious,because

you’rereallyateacheraswell,doyoufeelthataswell?

Pat: Yeah,onthemicro-level,everytimeIfindanewtoolorsome

amazingtechniquethatworks,Iimmediatelyshareit,justbecause

Iwantotherstoexperiencethatsamething,andIalsowanttobe

theonethatshowsittothem,soIcancontinuetobethereforthem

andsupportthemthroughouttheironlinebusinessjourney,orit’s




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notevenrelatedtoonlinebusiness,towhateveritisthey’redoing.

Iwanttobearesourceforpeople.Ithinkthatgoesalongwith

legacy,Ithink,andthat’ssomethingthat’sreallyimportanttome.

Doyouthinkthatfaraheadintermsofwhyyoudowhatyoudo,in

termsoflegacyandhavingyourinformationliveforyearsbeyond?

Jonathan: Yeah.It’sreallyinteresting,I’veactuallybeenthinkingaboutthe

word“legacy,”alotlately.I’mnotsurewhy.Itprobablyhastodo

withthefactthatI’minmy50thyear.It’sfunny,30and40,Ididn’t

careatall,butsomethinghappenedinthisyearwhereIgotreally

reflectiveandIreallystartedaskingthatquestion,“WhatamIdoing

here?What’smyworkontheplanet,andisitmeaningfultome,and,

hopefully,tootherpeople?”

Yeah,Idothinkaboutit,butthere’sbeenaninterestingshiftinthe

waythatIthinkabouttheword“legacy”aswell,andthatisthatI

thinklessaboutthebodyofworkthatI’mleavingbehind,andIthink

moreaboutlegacyasthewaythatI’mlivingmylifeonanygiven

day.IhavecometotheplacewhereIreallyfeellike,ifIwakeupin

themorningandIcanallowmyselfthebandwidthandthegrace,

andthespacetodogoodworkthatdayandthenIrestmyheadon

mypillowatnightandIclosemyeyesandsay,“Youknowwhat?

Thishasbeenagoodday.I’vedonegoodwork.I’vedonestuffthat

matters,that’smeaningful,thatleverageseverythingthatIhave.”

IfIjustdothateveryday,thenIthinklegacy,byanydefinition,isjust

goingtotakecareofitself.

Pat: Doyouthinktoyourselfatnighteverydaywhetherornotit’sawin

oraloss?

Jonathan: IthinkIprobablydo.Idon’tknowifIactuallyaskthequestionthat

way,butIthinkIdorestmyheadonmypillowatnightandIjust

reflectbriefly.Ihaveabitofamorningpracticeandanevening

practice,andIwanttoknowthatthewayI’vebeenspendingmy

timeisworthit,thatit’smeaningful,it’scontributinginsomeway,

andthat’sit’swellused.Ithinkwealltendtobelievethatthereis

whatwebelievetobepotential,andthenthere’swhatwebelieve




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tobelivingeveryday.Ihaven’tyetmetthepersonthatdoesn’tfeel

thatthere’ssomeamountofgapbetweenthosetwo.

IthinkwhatItryanddoisconsistentlyaskmyself,“AmIdoing

thingsthatallowmetoclosethatgap?AmItakingactionsthat

allowmetostepmorefullyintowhatIbelievetobeasmypotential,

andalsoexploreitandhelpidentifywhatthatspaceis?”Yeah,I

probablydoabitofmini-debriefattheendofeverydayorso,andif

noteveryday,thenminimallyeveryfewdays.

Pat: Yeah,that’ssomethingIdoeveryday.Iuseajournal,calledThe

FiveMinuteJournal,whichactuallyyouwriteineverysingle

morningandeverysinglenight,andatnightyoudoalittlebitofa

debriefonwhatyouwishyouhaddonebetter,butalsowhatwent

awesomethatday.Justtobeabletokeeptrackofthathasmade

memoremotivatedeachdaywhenIwakeuptomakesureIhave

somethingtotalkaboutattheend.

Jonathan: Yeah,no,Itotallylovethat.Ithinkalsoitstartstoputyouintheframe

oflivinglifeasapractice.I’mahugebeliever…It’sinteresting,along

withthebookthat’sbeingtraditionallypublished,we’veactually

spentawholebunchoftimecreatingourowncompanionpractice

journalandtheideaisexactlythat.It’sthatit’salmostlikethere’san

incitingincidentwhichsortoflikeshakesyoufromyourstatusquo

andthenanexperiencewhichallowsyoutolearnsomethingnew,

toessentiallyputonanewlensandgetanewmodelofthewayto

movethroughtheworld.Mostpeoplebecomereallyinspiredforthe

firstmonthorso,andthenitfallsaway.

I’mahugefanofapproachinglife,approachingalmosteverything

asaseriesofdailypracticesthataresomewhatgentle,almost

innocuousinhowsometimeseasytheyfeel,butthenyoukeep

doingthemeverydayandovertimetheyhavethiscompounding

effect,whereyoulookbackafter6monthsorayearandyou’relike,

“Wow.Thingsarereallydifferentinalarge,measurableway.”

Pat: Yeah,Ilovethat.Nowlet’sgetintothebook.Inoneofthefirstfew

pageshereIseeanillustrationthathas3differentbucketsonit,




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andyoutalkaboutthesebucketsthroughoutthebook.It’sevenon

thecoveraswell.Whatistheimportanceofthesebuckets?Howdo

thesethingshelpusvisualizewhat’sgoingoninourlives,andhow

cantheyhelpus?

Jonathan: Yeah,Ireferencedthisearlier.Ifyouaskmyteamwhatmyparticular

rapis,they’llprobablytellyoulanguageandpatternrecognition.I

lovetakingbig,messydatasetsanddistillingthemintoreallysimple

modelsthatpeoplecanactuallyusetoguidetheirbehavior.That’s

essentiallywhattheseGoodLifeBucketsare.

Thetruthisthere’sprobablyverylittlethat’sgenuinelynewin

theworldofhumanpotentialandpersonaldevelopmentin,I’d

probablysay,afewthousandyears,ifI’mbeinghonest.Ithinkthe

bigchallengeisthatinformationveryoftenisn’tshared,isn’toffered

inawaythat’ssimple,digestible,andactionablebyalmostanyone

withoutforcingmassivedisruptionordeepstudy.

Thegoalwastocreateareallysimplemodelthatyoucouldhear

once,yourememberforever,andyoucanwakeupeverymorning

andit’sactionable.Forme,IcalltheseyourGoodLifeBuckets.

Thinkofyourlifeas3differentbucketsandthosebucketsare

Contribution,Connection,andVitality.Yourcontributionbucketis

fundamentallyhowyou’rebringingyourselftotheworld,howyou’re

bringingyourgifts,yourstrengths,yourvaluestotheworld.Areyou

contributinginawaythat’sleveragingthefullnessofwhoyouare,

andisdeeplymeaningfulandmakingadifference?

Yourconnectionbucketisaboutyourrelationships.It’saboutyour

knowledgeofself,butalsoyourrelationshipbetweenanyintimate

partner,familymembers,closefriends,colleagues,yourcommunity,

ifyouhaveaclose,likemindedcommunity.Weallneedareally

deepsenseofbelonging.Ifit’ssomethingthatmatterstoyou,

whetheryoudefineitasSource,orGod,orwhateveritmaybe,and

soit’saboutthoserelationships.

Then,thevitalitybucketisaboutoptimizingyourstateofmindand

body.Ispeakaboutthemnotuniquely,butasonething,because




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it’scrystalclearnowfromalltheresearchthattheyare,infact,a

seamlessfeedbackmechanism.Thereisnoseparatemindand

body,soit’sreallyaboutareyoudoingthingsonadailybasisto

optimizeyourstateofmindandyourstateofbody?

Theideaisreallysimple.It’sthatagoodlifeisaboutfillingthese

bucketsandaboutkeepingthemasfullaspossibleonaregular

basis.Everyday,whatwe’relookingtodoissay,“Hey,super-quick

snapshot,howfulldoesmyvitalitybucketfeeltoday?AmIsatisfied

withthelevelofmyconnectionbucket?AmIsatisfiedwithmy

contributionbucket,withthewaythatI’mcontributingtotheworld?”

Then,ifyou’renot,focusonthebucketthatfeelslikeitreallyneeds

somelove,anddosomethingtofillit,soyou’reconstantlyfilling

thesebuckets.

Thethingaboutthemodelisit’sreallysimple;youhearitonce,

yourememberit,andthenmaybethemostimportantthingtome

isitguidesbehavior.Itwilltellyouwhattodo.Ifyoufeellikeyour

connectionbucketislow,well,thereareawholebunchoftiny

thingsthatyoucando.Youcancommittodoingasinglethingthat

daytoadd,tofillthatbucketabitmore.Whathappensovertimeis

thatyoujustkeepfillingthemprettyclosetofull,andkeeptopping

themoff,andwithouteventhinkingaboutit,withoutanybig,

disruptivemovesormakingbigchanges,yourlifejuststartstogeta

wholelotbetter.

Pat: Ilovethat.It’sinterestingthatyouuse“bucket”astheanalogy

there,becauseIthinkwe’veallheardofTheBucketList,right?

Jonathan: Yeah.

Pat: Weallthinkof,“Okay,thesearethethingswehavetodoonour

bucketlistbeforewedie,inordertoconsiderourselvessomewhat

happythatwe’veachievedthosethingsthatwe’vealwayswanted

toachieve.”You’rebreakingitdowntosomethingnotjusttoshoot

foronedayinthefuture,buthowtoguideyourdailylife.These

buckets,they’rereallyinteresting.We’respeakingonananalogy

rightnow,butaretheyallthesamesize?Canwefillthem?Can




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peopleremovethingsfromthem?

Jonathan: Yeah,Ithinkthey’reallprettymuchthesamesize,althoughit’srare

thatthey’reallfull,andit’srarethatthey’reallequallyfull.Thereare

whatIcall,“Thelawsofthebuckets,”also.

It’sfunnythatyoumentiontheideaofabucketlistessentially,

becausethatphraseoriginallycomesfrom“kickthebucket.”

Whenthattimescomeswhenyoukickthebucket,whereyou

ceasetolive,thesearethethingsyouwanttohavedone,whichis

essentiallywhenthebuckettipsoverandit’sempty.It’sprettymuch

trueofthese3bucketstoo.Ifatanygivenpointanyoneofyour

bucketsrunsdry,you’regoingtofeelaworldofhurt.If2rundry,

you’regoingtobeinexcruciatingpain.If3rundry,youwillliterally

andfigurativelybedead.Youcan’texistatthetimethatall3of

thesebucketsgoemptyandgetkicked.

Idon’tlookatthemasbeingdifferentsizes,butIdolookatthemasa

dynamicprocessofhavingtoregularlyfillthem.It’salmostlikeIlook

atthemas3buckets,andyouhaveawateringcan,andyourjobisto

justkeepcirclingaroundthem,fillingthemalittlebiteachday.

Thethingis,theyallleak,sotherenevercomesatimewhenyou

canfillup,likeyoucompletelytopoffyourvitalitybucket.You’ve

gotthesebeautifulpractices,you’removingyourbody,you’re

meditating,you’reeating,you’resleeping,you’redoingallthese

thingstocompletelyoptimizeyourstateofmindandbeingand

you’relike,“Okay,I’mgood.I’mdone.Canstop.”Thattimenever

happens,becausethatbucketleaksjustliketheotheronesdo,

whichmeansthatthere’saninvitationeveryday.Here’sapractice.

Youneedtokeepdoingalittlesomethingtokeepthemfull,even

whenthey’remostfull.Veryoften,especiallyasentrepreneurs,

wetendtoabandonsomeoftheseandnotrespondtothemuntil

they’recausingalotofhurtforus.

Pat: Itjustremindedme,actually,ofanotherbucketthingthatmysonis

doing.He’sin1stgrade.Hejuststarted1stgradeandontheirfirst

dayofclasstheyreadthisbookcalled,“HaveYouFilledtheBucket




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Today?”Hewastellingmeaboutthisexercisewhereyouimagine

thateverybodyhasabucketandyourjobistotryandfillitbygiving

peoplecompliments,bydoingthingsforotherpeople.That’show

youfillotherpeople’sbuckets.

Jonathan: Ilovethat.

Pat: Youcantakethingsawayandhavethemnothaveanything

anymorebybeingmeantothem,disrespectful,notdoingthings

forthem,thatsortofthing.It’sreallyinterestingthatevenatakid’s

levelthey’reunderstandingthesebuckets.Ifhecaninthissense,

weabsolutelycanwiththese3bucketsthatyou’retalkingabout.

Weonlyhavealittlebitmoretime,soIjustwanttocoversomeof

thebiggerideasandthingsthataremaybemoreactionablethat

peoplecantakeawayfromthisconversation.Obviously,Iwant

everybodytogoandcheckoutthebook.Actually,where’sthelink

wherepeoplecangoandcheckitout,beforewe...?

Jonathan: ItyoujustgotoGoodLifeProject.com/book,that’swhereyoucanall

theinformation.

Pat: Okay,sweet.Thankyou.TherewasonesectioninherethatI

commentedon,becauseit’ssomethingI’vebeentryingtolearn

howtodomore.I’vebeenprettygoodoverthelastcoupleof

years,butIcanstillworkonitandIknowalotofotherpeoplecan

too,andthat’stheideaofsaying,“No.”Canyoutalkaboutwhy

that’ssoimportant?

Jonathan: Yeah,andthisissomethingthatsomanypeoplehavesomuch

troublewith,becausewe’retrainedtobegraciousandtoalways

say,“yes,”becausethat’sthecourteousthingtodo.Theproblemis

thepaceoflifethesedaysandtheeaseofaccessthatpeoplehave

tous,andtheexpectationthatyou’llalwaysbeavailable,hasmade

itsothatrequestsforourtime,forourlove,forourenergy,forour

bandwidth,forourwisdom,havereachedanear-mercilesslevel.

That’sledtoalotofuslivingthesefiercelyreactiveliveswhere,




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insteadofactuallywakingupinthemorning,intentionallychoosing

whatgenuinelymatterstous,andthengivingeverythingthatwe

havetothosethingstomakearealdifference,weendupactually

populatingeverymomentofourdaywiththeminutiaandthetask

listsandtheto-dos,andtheagendasofathousandotherpeople,

whoessentiallypushtheirprioritiesandtheiragendasontoourlives.

Itleavesusfeelingmaniacallybusy,overwhelmed,andgutted,and

alsothatwe’rejustsofarfromourpotential.Theunderlyingreason

isthatwe’renotawareof,butalsobecausewe’veneveractually

learnedtosay“No.”We’vegottentoaplacewherewe’rejustlike,

“yes,yes,yes,yes,”andthenwehavenotimetoactuallydothe

stuffthatgenuinelymatterstous.

I’mahugebelieverinactuallypracticingtheartofsaying“No.”

Literally,beforeyousay“yes,”toanything,beforeyouletanybody

elseknowthatyou’reavailabletothem,askaquestion.Say,“Does

thisgenuinelymatter?Doesitmakeadifferenceinsomethingthat’s

deeplyimportanttome?”Iftheanswerisnow,thentheanswerto

thepersonwho’srequestingshouldbe“no,”aswell,andthat’swhat

givesustheability,thespace,todowhatreallymatters.

Pat: Ithinkalotofusareworriedaboutlettingotherpeopledown,

though.Howdowegetoverthat?

Jonathan: Practice.It’salmostlikeexposuretherapy.It’ssortoflikethemore

youdoit,themoreyoustarttorealizethatpeople…It’sreally

fascinatingtome.I’msure,likeyou,Igetrequestsallday,everyday,

forallsortsofthings,andIliterallyhaveabunchofdifferentways

thatIsay“No.”I’vereallytriedtothinkabouthowIwouldsaynoin

themostcourteousway,whereit’srespectfulandnotoffensive.

I’vehadanumberofpeoplereplytomeandsay,“Youknow,I

wasreallybummedthatyousaid‘no,’butIactuallycompletely

understandit,andIactuallyrespectyouforsaying‘no,’and

explainingthat,‘I’mactuallysayingnosothatIcanmakeroomto

reallyfocusonthethingsthataredeeplymeaningfultome,’and

you’resettingagreatexampleforme;so,thankyouforthat,and




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I’mgoingtostarttodothesamething.”It’salmostthiswaytoteach

withoutteaching.

Pat: Right,soyou’renotnecessarilyjustsaying,“No.”You’realso

explainingyourselfandbeinghonestatthesametime?

Jonathan: Yeah,exactly.

Pat: Thenhowdoyouprioritize?Obviously,wehavetosayyestosome

things,buthowdoweknowwhattosayyesto,versuswhattosay

noto?Doyouhaveanyspecialwaysthatyouprioritize?Obviously,

there’salotofbooksoutthereonhowtodothat,Essentialism,and

TheOneThing.What’syourtechnique?

Jonathan: I’mactuallyahugefanofEssentialismandTheOneThing.Ilove

bothofthosebooks.Ithinkthey’rereallypowerful,soratherthan

duplicatingwhattheysay,letmegoonelayerofftotheside.I

thinkthere’safoundationquestionthatwe’renotdealingwith

whenwe’retalkingaboutprioritizationandproductivity,andthat’s

awareness.Howcanyouchoosetheonethingthatmatters?How

canyouactuallyunderstandwhattosayyesornoto,untilyou

actuallydoalittlebitofworktounderstandyourself?

Weliveinavacuumofself-knowledge.There’salevelofself-

ignorancethatsomanyofustendtowalkaroundwith,where

wedon’tactuallyunderstandwhat’simportanttous.Wedon’t

understandwhatmatters.Wedon’tunderstandwhatourstrengths

andourgiftsare,orourvaluesorbeliefsare,andthatmakesit

nearlyimpossibleforustounderstandwhattosayyesornoto,

becausewithoutreallyknowingourselves,wedon’thaveabasis

toprioritize.

Ithinkit’sreallyimportanttoadoptasystemlikeEssentialismor

TheOneThing,orwhateverothersystemjustworkswiththeway

thatyoulookattheworldandthewaythatyourbrainfunctions.

Onadeeperlevel,Ithinkthebiggerchallenge,andthemuchmore

effectiveunblockkeyisgoingtoactuallybetospendabitoftime

inself-discovery,andjustreallystartingoutbytryingtoaskyourself




15

thebigquestion,“What’simportanttome?”

Ifyouliterallysitdownandaskyourselfthequestion,“What’s

importanttome,”andthenjuststarttofreewriteandseewhat

comesup,that’sthestuffthatallowsyoutoprioritize.Ithinkifyou

don’tdothatandthenyoutryandapplysomesortofsurface-

levelmethodology,you’llgetefficientandproductive,butitwon’t

necessarilyleadtofulfillmentandmeaning.

Pat: Ithinkalotofpeople,theyoftenassumetheyknowwhythey’re

doingwhatthey’redoing,orwhattheirprioritiesare,andthey

almostkidthemselvessometimes.Howcanwehelpourselvesifwe

don’twantto?

Jonathan: Yeah.

Pat: Iknowit’saloadedquestion.

Jonathan: Itisareallyloadedquestion.Truecircumstanceisalmostlikeyou

can’thelpsomeoneuntilthey’rereadytobehelped,butIalsothink

thatcommunity,havingpeopleinyourlifethataregenuinemirrors,

whoyouknowaretherefortherightreasons.They’rethere.They’ll

behonestwithyou.They’llsupportyou,andthey’llalsoprovide

accountabilitytoyou,notbecausetheywanttocutyoudown,but

becausetheywanttoseeyourise.They’llbehonestbecausethey

wanttoseeyouflourish.Ithinkhavingthatonepersonorsmall

communityofpeoplecanbereallymission-criticalinhelpingus

coursecorrect.IknowIhavethosepeopleinmylife.Iknowyou

havethose.

Pat: Yeah,Ihave.

Jonathan: Youprobablyhaveacoupleofpeopleandgroupsinyourlifeas

well.Ithinkthosehavebeensoinstrumentaltomeinunderstanding

howto,especiallyhowtofillmycontributionbucket.Interestingly,

I’llhaveasmallbusinessmastermindoragroupoffriends,and

ostensiblyit’sabouthowwe’recontributingtotheworld,butit

alwaysgetspersonalbecause,underneaththat,ifsomething’snot

workingright,it’salwayspersonal,andsowegothere.




16

Pat: Tofinishitoff,Jonathan,youhadmentionedearlierabouthowjust

fastlifeisgoingrightnow,andinstantaneousthingsarehappening.

Youwroteachapter,ortalkedalittlebitaboutlivingintheslow

lane,whichistheoppositetakeofwhatmostpeoplesay.We

alwayssay,“Let’sliveinthefastlane,”becausethat’sthequickest

routetowhereverwewanttogo,andtheslowlaneistypically

wherepeopledon’twanttobe.Whydoyoumentionweshould

travelintheslowlanesometimes?

Jonathan: Ithinkwhathappensiswearesorunbypaceandbyspeed,and

bytryingtogettotheoutcomethatitdoes2things.Oneisit

completelyobliteratestheexperienceofjoyalongtheway.Itkind

ofjustcrushesusandtheninevitablywhathappensis,evenifwe

gettotheoutcome,werealizethatit’snottheoutcomethatwe

thoughtitwouldbe.It’snotmakingusfeelthewaywethoughtit

wouldfeel,andsonowwe’venowguttedourselftogetthere,and

nowwe’rethere,andit’snotgivinguswhatweneeded.

Atthesametime,whatI’veexperiencediswhenyoumovesuper,

superfast,yourrateoferrorincreasesdramatically.Somuchofthe

reasonthatweendupbeingsobusyisnotbecausewehavetobe

thatbusy,it’sbecausewe’removingsoquicklythattheerrorrate

ismakingushavetoredo,havetogobackandfixandcorrect.I’ve

runsomeexperimentsandI’vefoundthatactuallyI’masproductive,

ifnotmoreproductive,dialingitback,dialingeverythingIdoback,

andmovingmoreslowlythanIamwhenI’mmovinghyper-fast,

becauseitremovessomuchoftheerrorfromtheprocessthatI

actuallyendupinthesameplaceifnotalotbetterworkingmuch

moregentlyandhavingjustsomuchjoyalongtheway.

Pat: Yeah,Ithinkthatjoypartalongtheway,youoftenmovesofast

youmisshowamazingtheclimbissometimes,becauseyou’rejust

tryingtogettothetopsofast.

Jonathan: Especiallyforentrepreneurs,it’sahugephenomenon.Wejustwant

togetthere,neverrealizingthattheonly“there,there,”ishonestly,

“here,now.”

Pat: Howdoyouslowdown?




17

Jonathan: Forme,I’mconstantlycheckingin.Ithinkformethere’sareallybig

overridingthing,whichisthatIhaveadailymindfulnesspractice

thatstartseverysingleday.

Pat: Iknowyoumeditate,right?

Jonathan: Yeah,Ido.Iwakeupeverymorning.It’sthefirstthingthatIdo.

Actually,it’snotthefirstthingthatIdo.ThefirstthingIdoisgrind

mycoffeebeansandturnonthecoffeemaker,andthenImeditate

whilethecoffeeisbrewing.Notonlydoesitsetthetoneforthe

entireday,butalso,overtime,itcultivatestheabilitytojustbeable

tokindofzoomthelensoutandnoticewhenyou’rereallyjust

doingstupidstuff,whenyou’rejustfritteringawayallofyourtime

onstuffthatdoesn’tmatter.

Iknowyouhaveapracticealso.DoyoustillusetheMUSE?Iknow

you...

Pat: Ido,Ido.IneeditandIloveitbecauseoftheimmediatefeedback

andthetracking.That’swhatmotivatesme,personally.

Jonathan: Yeah,anddoyoufinditmakesarealdifferenceforyouaswell?

Pat: Oh,yeah.Oh,absolutely.Insomanyareasofmylife,likeyousaid,

ithelpedmefocusoncertainthings,butalsowhenIgetdistracted

orwhenIgetoutoffocus,orIrealizeI’mdoingsomethingI’mnot

supposedto,IrealizethatsoonerandIcanmorequicklygetback

ontherighttrack.That’sthebiggestdifferenceI’vefoundwithmy

meditationpractice.

Jonathan: Yeah,Itotallyagree.I’veseenthat.Italmostcaughtmebysurprise

whenIstartednoticingthatthatwashappening.Iwaslike,“Wow,

thatis,”it’sareallypowerfulbenefit.

Pat: Yeah.Loveit.Jonathan,Ifeelwecouldtalkforhours,butIguess

everybodywilljusthavetopickupyourbookandcheckitout.

Wherecantheyfindyouandyourbook?

Jonathan: GoodLifeProject.com/bookiswherethebookisat,and,ofcourse,




18

it’salsojustavailableatresellerseverywhere.

Pat: Awesome.Thanks,Jonathan.Weappreciateyou.It’sbeensucha

pleasuretotalktoyouhereontheshow.LikeIsaid,I’velookedup

toyouforsolong,andit’sjustreallycoolthatyou’reherewithus

andsharingsomeofyourwisdomtoday.Thankyou.

Jonathan: Yeah,it’smypleasure.Thankssomuchforinvitingme,Pat.

Pat: Allright,IhopeyouenjoyedthatinterviewwithJonathanFields.If

youwanttogethisbookandcheckitout,gotoGoodLifeProject.

com/book,andofcourseyoucangetallthelinksandtheresources

mentionedinthisepisodeatSmartPassiveIncome.com/session236.

IactuallyhadthepleasureofhavingdinnerwithJonathannot

toolongagoatPodcastMovement,inChicago.Itwashimand

AndrewWarner,andJohnLeeDumas,andmyself,andIgotto

meetJonathan’swife.Shewasamazing,anditwasjustsuchacool

atmospheretobeinthatrestaurantwithsomebodywhoIhadbeen

lookinguptoforsolong,andjust,honestly,hands-down,oneofthe

mostgenuine,heartfeltguysIknow.

Jonathan,thankyouagainforbeingontheshow.Goodluckwith

thebookandthelaunchandeverything,andI’llbesuretodowhat

Icankeepmybucketsasfullaspossible,andtokeepeveryone

else’sbucketsasfullaspossiblewho’slisteningtotheshow.Ithink

that’sagreatanalogy.It’ssomethingthatIwouldwanttopassonto

mykidsforsure,sothankyouforthat,Jonathan.

NowIwanttotakeaquickmomenttothanktoday’ssponsor,which

is99Designs.com.Ifyouneedanydesignworkdownforyour

business…Ifyou’redoingbusinessonline,youlikelyneedsome

sortofdesign,andyoucan’tdesignthatonedesignerthatyou

canworkwithforfull-timeorevenpart-time,ifyou’rejustdoinga

one-offproject,forexample,Iwouldhighlyrecommendchecking

out99Designs.com.Notonlyisitaquickturnaround,youcan

getadesigndonein7days,butit’sreallycoolbecauseyouget

designersfromallaroundtheworldsortofpitchinginwiththeir

versionofyourdesign.Yougettopicktheonethatyoulikebest




19

andwalkhomewiththatone.It’sreallycool.

Ifyoudon’tlikeanyofthedesignsthatgetsubmittedinthisdesign

contestthatyou’reholdinghere,forwhateveritisthatyou’relooking

for…Itcouldbeanythingfromalogotoabookcover.I’veusedit

myselfformyson’ssoccerteam.I’veuseditfore-bookcovers,all

sortsofthings,anything,really.Afterthedesigncontestisover,if

youdon’tlikewhatyousee,yougetyourmoneyback.It’ssuper-

cool.Iactuallyjustrecentlydidadesigncontestforaninfographic

thatworkedoutreallywell,andit’sactuallydrivinginalotoftraffic

forsomeoldpoststhatIhadrepurposedintoaninfographic.

Ifyouwanttocheckitout,goto99Designs.com/SPI,andifyougo

throughthatlinkyou’llget$99thatyoucanputtowardyournext

designprojectforfree,whichisreallycool,so,99Designs.com/SPI.

Allright,thankssomuch.IappreciateyouandIlookforwardto

servingyouinnextweek’sepisode.Untilthen,keeppushingit

forward.Keepfillingthosebuckets,andI’llseeyounextweek.Bye,

guys.

Announcer: ThanksforlisteningtotheSmartPassiveIncomePodcastatwww.

SmartPassiveIncome.com.




20

ReSouRceS: GoodLifeProject.com

HowtoLiveaGoodLife

TheFiveMinuteJournal

Essentialism

TheOneThing

Muse

SpoNSoRS: 99Designs.com




http://goodlifeproject.com

http://goodlifeproject.com/book

https://finconexpo.com

https://www.amazon.com/Five-Minute-Journal-Happier-Minutes/dp/0991846206

http://www.smartpassiveincome.com/essentialism

http://www.smartpassiveincome.com/theonething

http://www.smartpassiveincome.com/muse

http://99designs.com/spi


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