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THE THE THE THE THE WWWWWORD OF GOD ?ORD OF GOD ?ORD OF GOD ?ORD OF GOD ?ORD OF GOD ?

( Biblical Topic )

Fr. Xavier Khan Vattayil

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Author : Fr. Xavier Khan Vattayil

Copyright : Reserved

Co-ordinator : Sabu Kasarcode

Translation : S. Jose Kodankandath- Mumbai

Corroboration : Dilon

Lay out : Sebastian K.T.

Published by : Maranatha Media Centre

Printed at : Magicteck,Pkd. Mob. 9846568540

1st Impression : 2013 July

Copies : 10,000

Price : `̀̀̀̀ 8.00

INTERMARRIAGEIS IT ACCORDING TO THE WORD OF GOD ?

(English)

Deut 5:32,33 “You must therefore be careful

to do as the Lord your God has commanded you:

you shall not turn to the right or to the left. You

must follow exactly the path that the Lord your God

has commanded you, so that you may live, and that

it may go well with you, and that you may live long

in the land that you are to possess.”

Is intermarriage permissible for a child of God?

What does the Holy Bible say in this regard?

Tobit 4:12-13 “Beware my son, of every kind

of fornication. First of all, marry a woman from

among the descendants of your ancestors; do not

marry a foreign woman, who is not your father’s

INTERMARRIAGEIS IT ACCORDING TO THE WORD OF GOD ?

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tribe; for we are the descendants of the prophets.

Remember, my son, that Noah, Abraham, Isaac and

Jacob, our ancestors of old, all took wives from

among their kindred. They were blessed in their

children and their posterity will inherit the land.

So now, my son, love your kindred, and in your

heart do not disdain your kindred, the sons and

daughters of your people by refusing to take a wife

for yourself from among them. For in pride there

is ruin and great confusion. And in idleness there

is loss and dire poverty, because idleness is the

mother of famine.”

The Holy Bible does not approve intermarriage.

You therefore, do not get deceived by entering into

intermarriage. Do not chop away the traditions of the

family of our forefathers. Do not ignore the paths of

sanctified life revealed and constituted by the Holy

Spirit through our ancestors. Influenced by the

haughtiness and thoughtlessness of your youth age,

do not jump into conclusions.

Wisdom 3:11 “For those who despise wisdom

and instruction are miserable. Their hope is vain,

their labours are unprofitable, and their works are

useless.”

The arrogance inside your mind turns out to be

the reason for your ruin, chaos and anarchism. Just

examine the life of Solomon. God liked him very much.

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More than what he had asked, God gave and kept on

blessing him.

2 Chronicles 1:12 “Wisdom and knowledge are

granted to you. I will also give you riches,

possessions and honour, such as none of the kings

had who were before you, and none after you shall

have the like.”

God abundantly blessed and loved Solomon. But,

we see the downfall of Solomon from Verse, 1 Kings

11:1 onwards. As God appeared to Solomon the third

time, He declared that the kingdom will be torn away

from him.

1 Kings 11: 11-12 “Since this has been your

mind and you have not kept my covenant and my

statutes that I have commanded you, I will surely

tear the kingdom from you and give it to your

servant. Yet for the sake of your father David I will

not do it in your lifetime; I will tear it out of the

hand of your son.”

God took away the pomp, splendor and

prosperity from Solomon.

What was the reason?

It was because of intermarriage.

1 Kings 11:1-8 “King Solomon loved many

foreign women along with the daughter of Pharaoh:

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Moabite, Ammonite, Edomite, Sidonian and Hittite

women, from the nations concerning which the

Lord had said to the Israelites, ‘you shall not enter

into marriage with them, neither shall they with

you; for they will surely incline your heart to follow

their gods;’ Solomon clung to these in love. Among

his wives were seven hundred princesses and

three hundred concubines; and his wives turned

away his heart. For when Solomon was old, his

wives turned away his heart after other gods; and

his heart was not true to the Lord his God, as was

the heart of his father David. For Solomon followed

Astarte the goddess of the Sidonians, and Milcom

the abomination of the Ammonites. So Solomon

did what was evil in the sight of the Lord, and did

not completely follow the Lord, as his father David

had done. Then Solomon built a high place for

Chemosh the abomination of Moab, and for Molech

the abomination of the Ammonites, on the mountain

east of Jerusalem. He did the same for all his

foreign wives, who offered incense and sacrificed

to their gods.”

Solomon had married and brought several

princesses belonging to other casts and tribes from

the kingdoms he had conquered in war.

Exodus 34:15-16 “You shall not make a

covenant with the inhabitants of the land, for when

they prostitute themselves to their gods and

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sacrifice to their gods, someone among them will

invite you, and you will eat of the sacrifice. And

you will take wives from among their daughters for

your sons, and their daughters who prostitute

themselves to their gods will make your sons also

prostitute themselves to their gods.”

To Solomon it never felt that bad, his filthy deeds

which were forbidden by the Lord, God. And what was

the result? His tribe became weak… later ruined….

In ten years since the death of Solomon, his five

successors were beheaded. The explanation of that

terrible decline of his kingdom can be read in the Book

of Sirach.

Sirach 47:16-21 “Your fame reached to far-off

islands, and you were loved for your peaceful

reign. Your songs, proverbs, and parables and the

answers you gave astounded the nations. In the

name of the Lord God, who is called the God of

Israel, you gathered gold like tin and amassed

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silver like lead. But you brought in women to lie at

your side, and through your body you were brought

into subjection. You stained your honour and

defiled your family line, so that you brought wrath

upon your children, and they were grieved at your

folly, because the sovereignty was divided and a

rebel kingdom arose out of Ephraim".

Solomon’s life experience in the Holy Bible….

….for what has it been given to us ?

1 Cor 10:11 “These things happened to them

to serve as an example, and they were written down

to instruct us, on whom the ends of the ages have

come.”

Yes ! It is a lesson for us. Christians who are

engaged in love-affair with others belonging to

different casts and communities are living in sin. It is

wrong. It is to be corrected. It has to be stopped !

Here are some statements which usually sprout

from many:

‘Are not all the children of God?’ ‘ What if I marry

anyone ?’

‘ Is it not the match of mind, the most important

matter ?’

‘ I will marry whom I like. No one need advise

me…! ’

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The Holy Bible preaches, thus:

Isaiah 30:1 “Oh, rebellious children, says the

Lord, who carry out a plan, but not mine; who make

an alliance, but against my will, adding sin to sin.”

Sirach 5:9 “Do not winnow in every wind, or

follow every path.”

Sirach 6:2-4 “ Do not fall into the grip of

passion, or you may be torn apart as by a bull. Your

leaves will be devoured and your fruit destroyed,

and you will be left like a withered tree. Evil passion

destroys those who have it and makes them the

laughing stock of their enemies.”

The path which you think right may not be right.

Your wisdom and logical reasoning may not show you

the right way.

Proverbs :16:25 “Sometimes there is a way that

seems to be right, but in the end it is the way to

death.”

Intermarriage is not at all an arrangement of God.

The Holy Bible does not support this. You do not get

cheated. Do not ignore the preachings of the Holy

Church. At the behest of a sudden impulse, do not

dilute or discard the customs and life-styles that were

followed by our ancestors. Hold on to our traditions.

Help your children to grow up, rooted in the Word of

God.

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Supporting the intermarriage, some of those who

used to proudly pretend to stick on to the progressive

thoughts in matters relating to marriage, used to raise

some questions.

If suppose we disagree and detach

those who have prepared for intermarriage,

and hold another marriage, if that

relationship too ends up in failure ?

While thinking of this, there is a point that we have

to understand. Marriage, life-partner, family…. all

these are as per God’s plan and design. If a marriage

takes place as per the Will of God, and later it turns

out to be in misery and hardship, that has to be

shouldered on.

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By that marriage what if our God is wishing for

the sancti f ication of a soul ? Marriage is an

arrangement of God, as well for the eternal salvation.

1 Peter 4:12 “Beloved, do not be surprised at

the fiery ordeal that is taking place among you to

test you, as though something strange were

happening to you.”

Some people ask doubts: After I gave

promise to marry and then if I change my

mind…. Won’t it be a cheating? Will not

there be some curse?

No. As the Sacraments l ike marriage and

priesthood are covenants that last till the moment of

the person’s death, that person has the right to turn

away from it till the moment just before accepting

those Sacraments. Marriage must be with fee will. It

should not be under any pressure or compulsion.

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Withdrawal from an unwelcoming / inter-caste

love-affair in response to anyone’s advice does not

bring any curse at all.

Some others are stating: The person is

of a good character. Won’t drink; no

smoking habits; no cards-playing nature;

is of a very virtuous behaviour… Highly

educated; got a good job too. Only, the

person is not from our caste. Can this

relationship be led to marriage? What shall

I do?

While thinking of marriage, not only the job,

character, health etc… are to be taken into

consideration, but also you must think about your

relation with Jesus Christ. You should not do anything

that will fade this relationship.

“Because, you are Israel.”

You are the child of a Covenant. There should

not be any action from your side that may break the

Covenant with God.

2 Cor 6:14-15 “Do not be mismatched with

unbelievers, for what partnership is there between

righteousness and lawlessness? Or what

fellowship is there between light and darkness?

What agreement does Christ have with Beliar? Or

what does a believer share with an unbeliever?”

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2 Cor 6:17-18 “Therefore, come out from

them and be separate from them, says the Lord,

and touch nothing unclean; then I will welcome

you, and I will be your father, and you shall be my

sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.”

Often we come across some persons who used

to say:

‘If this marriage is not taking place, I do not want

a marriage at all !’

This is not a right thought. While our God is giving

you an instruction, you should not behave obstinately.

Sirach 3:26-27 “A stubborn mind will fare

badly at the end, and whoever loves danger will

perish in it. A stubborn mind will be burdened by

troubles, and the sinner adds sin to sins.”

Deute. 29: 18-19 “It may be that there is among

you a man or woman, or a family or tribe, whose

heart is already turning away from the Lord our

God to serve the gods of those nations. It may be

that there is among you a root sprouting poisonous

and bitter growth. All who hear the words of this

oath and bless themselves, thinking in their hearts,

‘we are safe even though we go our own stubborn

ways.”

Sirach 5:2 “Do not follow your inclination and

strength in pursuing the desires of your heart.”

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You must be aware of what the

Holy Church is highlighting about this

subject in its teachings in CATECHISM OF

THE CATHOLIC CHURCH.

CCC 1601- “The matrimonial covenant, by

which a man and a woman establish between

themselves a partnership of the whole of life, is by

its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses

and the procreation and education of offspring;

this covenant between baptized persons has been

raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a

sacrament.”

This passage signifies that the foremost intention

of marriage of man and woman belonging to the same

Christian community / caste is so dignified by the

Sacrament of Marriage, and recognized by the Holy

Church. The purpose of this dignity is more

understood when we think of the graceful blessing of

our Lord for the procreation and education of children

of the duly wedded couple in the Christian community.

CCC 1633- “In many countries the

situation of a mixed marriage (marriage between a

Catholic and a baptized non-Catholic) often arises.

It requires particular attention on the part of

couples and their pastors. A case of marriage with

disparity of cult (between a Catholic and a non-

baptized person) requires even greater

circumspection.”

In this clause, a clear warning is highlighted about

the need for careful thinking about intermarriage,

before entering into it. The risks are so thick that there

is not a single point of advantage to either of the

persons who goes on so aggressively pondering on

such an alliance.

CCC 1634 - “Difference of confession between

the spouses does not constitute an insurmountable

obstacle for marriage, when they succeed in

placing in common what they have received from

their respective communities, and learn from each

other the way in which each lives in fidelity to

Christ. But the difficulties of mixed marriages must

not be underestimated. They arise from the fact

that the separation of Christians has not yet been

overcome; the spouses risk experiencing the

tragedy of Christian disunity even in the heart of

their own home. Disparity of cult can further

aggravate these difficulties. Differences about faith

and the very notion of marriage, but also different

religious mentalities, can become sources of

tension in marriage, especially as regards the

education of children the temptation to religious

indifference can then arise.”

A more transparent picture is depicted in this

passage on the dilemma which the two persons in an

intermarriage are about to face. Because of the

difference in culture and belief, unprovoked causes

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for unceasing tensions during the post-intermarriage

period cannot be avoided. In any of their future

planning, a core undeniable obstacle that may create

more sleepless nights can be due to the extremes of

customs and practices followed by the two different

religious thinking.

Therefore, as the follower of Jesus Christ, you

are not supposed to knowingly enter into such

accidents and spoil the aspirations of your parents,

and later spoil your own future.

What should be the attitude of a child of

God with regard to intermarriage?

1. Love everyone from other communit ies as

brothers and sisters. Do not select them as life-

partners.

2. Do not fall in love or engage in sexual deeds with

those from other communities. Always bear in

mind that any type of love-affair / sexual deeds

which are not accepted by the Holy Bible and

Canon laws are sins against the statutes of our

God.

3. Do not encourage anyone for intermarriage.

Persuade them from such affairs.

4. Adopt only the healthy directions of the Church

with regard to marriage. The Church is not

advising intermarriage. Know the preachings of

the Church with regard to intermarriage.

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5. Bring up children from childhood itself with the

right awareness of these matters.

6. During the preaching period, teach the children

about these matters.

7. If at any time such intermarriage is found to be

inevitable, the marriage can be accorded only

after the person from the other community accepts

Christian faith and becomes a member of the

Church. Also must think whether such an act could

entail others to follow such a wrong course.

Mathew 18:6 “If any of you put a stumbling

block before one of these little ones who believe

me, it would be better for you if a great millstone

were fastened around your neck and you were

drowned in the depth of the sea.”

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Prayer toThe Holy Spirit

O Holy Spirit … Comfort of my soul, I do

adore You. Enl ighten me ! Wash me!

Strengthen me! Control me! Console me!

Tell me what all I should do. Command me.

Let me obey.

O Holy Spirit … be my King. I submit

myself as your slave.

O Holy Spirit … Come and fill me !

Halleluiea ….. (Praise for a while)

(Repeat several times)

STAYING IN YOUR HOME

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2 Timo. 1:8 “Do not be ashamed, then, of the

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Mystic MannaSeries of history of Saints composed

by Fr. Xavier Khan Vattayil, exclusively for Children.

01. The Dove of Love

02. The one who became Prayer, by praying

03. The Martyr at the Confessional

04. The Ark of the Covenant

05. The Apostle of the eastern countries

06. In search of knowledge; in search of nectar

07. A sufferance journey

08. The Spiritual Teacher

09. Sowing virtue, reaping virtue

10. Universal Apostle

11. The Apostle of Charity

12. The Apostle of Moloko

13. The Man of Mercy

14. The Guide of Penance

15. The Saint of impossibles

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