Say It Just Right
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Transcript of Say It Just Right
Say It Just Right
www.TotalCommunicationsCoach.com
Say What You Want to Say
With Confidence
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Open-Ended Questions
Whenever I have something to say, I usually what do you usually do? People who always say what they think,
make me. . .how do these people make you feel? Confrontations with others cause me to. . .do
you love conflict or do you shy away?. . .
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GOALS
Define conflict Distinguish what to
do when Learning Stance—
Three C’s SIJR Model
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THE THREE C’S
Change? Who can you Change? Curiosity—Genuine
stance Compassion—
Genuine concern for the other
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Communication
Behavior that TransmitsMeaning from Sender to
Receiver
Sender
Receiver
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Types of Communication
Visual 55%
Vocal 38%
Verbal 7%
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Vocal Exercise
I didn’t say he stole the money
I didn’t say he stole the money
I didn’t say he stole the money
I didn’t say he stole the moneywww.TotalCommunicationsCoach.com
Behaviors
Openly Aggressive
Passive Aggressive
Assertive
Passive
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Aggressive BehaviorsI’m Okay, You’re Not
Demanding Angry Condescending Threatening Blaming Controlling
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Passive BehaviorsYou’re Okay, I’m Not
WithdrawsWalks Away Holds Feelings Inside Doesn’t Talk Becomes Depressed Suffers
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Passive Aggressive Behaviors
Complains Backstabs Gossips Loud Nonverbals Doesn’t Follow Through PoutsMartyrdom
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Assertive BehaviorsI’m Okay, You’re Okay
Problem Solving Disclosing Information Giving Checking Interdependency/Team Player Negotiating Directing LISTENING!!!!
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Communicate with Confidence
To know what you’re thinking and feeling and to be able to say it just right.
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Say It Just Right™ Model
Decision Points--Costs--Limits--Power
Specify Problem Invite the Other to Talk Join Feeling with Fact Resolve the Problem
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Detours
Put-Off Distracting Denying Blaming Joking Reinterpreting
“Poor Me” Negative-vibes Apologizing Threatening Debating Procrastinating
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Ways to Counter Detours
Persist Disagree Emphasize Feelings Agree. . .but State consequences
Dismiss Redefine Answer Fast Question/probe
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