Relationships: Different temperaments Difficulties in relating pres.pdf · Relationships:...
Transcript of Relationships: Different temperaments Difficulties in relating pres.pdf · Relationships:...
Relationships: Different temperaments
& Difficulties in relating
Boston - April 2009
Martedì, 5 maggio 2009
We have studied how every homeopathic remedy can be an anthropological model of major themes faced by human existence:
The world of sensations and pains
The world of instincts
The world of emotions
The different steps of the personal development
The importance of the integration of the corpus
The big vital functions
The process of individualizationMartedì, 5 maggio 2009
In this seminar we will talk about the same
developmental path from the perspective of
relationships
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Every human being has to confront the world around him.Depending on the environment,
he will relate in a constructive/destructive
or harmonic/dis-harmonic way.
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All humans establish effective relationships; they can be mature, equitable or pathological depending
whether they are....submissive or power oriented
fusional or avoidant
egocentric or oblative
...
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Relational problems are not merely symptoms to be treated.
They represent an important “key” to the function of every system of the person - of his resources and
his vulnerabilities.
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The evolution of the relational process is one of the most
important aspects of the process of the re-organization of the
person, much more than the simple
disappearance of some symptoms.
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“The man discovers in the world only what is already inside of him,
but he needs the world to discover what is inside of him”
Hugo von Hoffmannsthal
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Everybody projects around himself aspects of the organization of his
interior space.But those models become what
they are through the relationship with the external world.
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Our mind creates our own habitat
and in the meantime our
habitat molds our mind
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If we don’t recognize this complexity, or if we try to
eliminate it, different forms of reductionism could take place
(organically and psychologically)
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COMPLEXITY relates to a co-existence of heterogeneous
elements. This means the possibility of dissonance and conflict existing
together with a series of defensive and compensatory strategies.
Our system tries to keep those unavoidable disharmonious elements
within tolerable boundaries.
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From the homeopathic perspective it makes sense to underline those aspects
ONLY when the relational problems
are really fundamental themes of the remedy
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EVERY remedy has its own relational aspects
BUT this is not always significant enough to contribute to a more accurate differential
diagnosisMartedì, 5 maggio 2009
... it means that a competent homeopathic doctor,
after serious training ...Could imagine, through certain behavioral elements, the quality of the relationship of his patient
or ... through the understanding of deeper difficulties ... could imagine the possible relational problems of his patient
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... which means ...
A real medicine of complexity
To try to treat some problems BEFORE they could become really serious
To open the understanding of remedies from various perspectives: organic, psychological, relational ...
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whenever we deal with relational themes like:Jealousy
Forsaken
Autism
Power
...
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... we ALWAYS deal with different aspects of the same basic huge theme belonging to everybody
THE NECESSITY AND THE QUALITY OF THE RELATIONSHIPS
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according to the kind and quality of the relationships we can
consider:Dependence or Independence
Attachment or Detachment
Bond or Distance
Presence or Avoidance
...
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DEPENDENCE
The need to be always supported. A compulsory support from someone, something ...
According to human nature we ARE dependent, especially in the extreme moments of our life ...
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According to Fairbank there is
a “mature” or an “immature”
dependency
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Dependency and Addiction
Dependence can be physiological or pathological, according to how mature is the relationship
Addiction is a slavery
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Which rubrics?Which remedies?
Which homeopathic families?Which state of compensation?What kind of dependency?
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Basic dependency (primary needs)
Adhesive dependency (insecurity and constant seeking for confirmation, unable to detach from his partner)
Dependency from groups, house, family, structures ...
D. Narcissistic (claiming for love and/or appreciation)
D. Functional (seeking for protection)
D. Anxious (fear of loosing the endorsement)
D. Guilty (b/c of his real or imaginary parasitism)
D. Ambivalent
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Dependency with serious conflicts (constant criticism, unsatisfactory)
D. Anguish (trying to escape from it)
D. Passive (arriving to masochism, fear of being active)
D. Apathetic (paralyzed and dependent)
D. Parasitic
D. Panic
...
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A big thematic area:Support
Can be seen in EVERY remedy, more or less.
Important to understand WHICH kind of support.
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SupportEnormous importance of the acceptance during uterine life
After birth it’s better to consider the parental FUNCTIONS and not the historical mother and father
Extremely important HOW those functions can be developed inside every person and how they support him during his development
During life the support is not only limited to those functions but also to ...
A lack as well as excessive support can be problematic
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Empathic SupportRespecting who is supported, recognizing his peculiarity and his complexity.
It’s a mutual exchange, a real relationship, a big sense of freedom.
It’s based on the REAL needs of the supported, it’s not overcoming his personality.
It gives the necessary help to overcome the critical moments and it activates the resources, the awareness and the self confidence of the supported.
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or ... inadequate support like ...
Lack of containment (difficulties in containing the anxieties or the fears of the child; difficulties in offering the right tools to overcome the unavoidable frustrations of life; difficult sense of limits)
Overprotection (suffocative protection which does not help the child in develop his own tools to face life)
Parents’ Narcissism (excess of stimuli and/or expectations; the child as a narcissistic object ...)
Excessive attachment (fusional states ...)
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usually disease provokes withdrawal from relational investments and requires a greater need of support
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As every moment of crisis a disease allows the peculiar modalities of support to emerge more clearly.
This is the reason why, as homeopaths, we give so much
attention to our patients’ behavior.
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It’s extremely important to understand which kind of
patient-doctor relationship is requested.
Not only for a better management of the case but also
for a better understanding of the patient/remedy.
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In the moment that we go beyond the technical, and offer a supportive relationship, different subconscious relational issues are activated. Often the patient feels
that is “looked upon” through the ancient code of his life.
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It’s extremely important to remember that our patients, especially the children, are
always part of a system. Our work, as homeopaths, is always interfering with this system and we often have to consider the strong resistances to “changes”.
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A fundamental aspect of homeopathic medicine is the understanding that
existential suffering is not less important than “organic disease.”
This suffering can be as destructive, for the patient as for the society, and it deserves a serious attention from the medical class, not only from the
psychiatrists.
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A very actual and interesting issue is recognizing that there are deep
relationships between the development of the “self” and
somatic diseases.This is the basis of a real
psycho-somatic and integrated medicine.
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Defensive strategies and relational avoidance
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... how to avoid a relationship ... Destruction or annihilate “the other”
Being present, but with no contact: coldness unaffectionate.
Escape, hide, not being present, becoming “immaterial”
Altered perceptions of time/space
Hyperactivity, Busy, Workaholism, Hurry
Superficial contacts, Multiple contacts
Silence or excessive loquacity
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... how to avoid a relationship ... Childishness or Immaturity
Affectation, Haughtiness
Materialism
Timidity, self-devaluation
Becoming less interesting, distasteful, stinking
Obesity or underweight
Sexual difficulties
Cerebral decay
AngerMartedì, 5 maggio 2009
Attachment and Alexitimia
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Schizophysiology (McLean)as a lack of integration between
the cognitive representation of the attachment figure and the related
emotions
When the attachment figure is unable to communicate emotions
When the child is obliged to limit the expression of his emotions or to repress “inconvenient” emotions
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When the attachment figure is unable to communicate emotions
The “mother” usually propounds a model of herself which is mainly “cognitive”, limiting the possibility of existing, or just diminishing the importance, of a domain of emotions
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When the child is obliged to limit the expression of his emotions or to repress “inconvenient” emotions
we can make the hypothesis that the insecurity patterns of the child has to adopt mental strategies that limit the natural expression of emotions
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... for example ...
a child who is systematically refused would feel a deep sadness. So he could try not to be attached, which is almost impossible, or repress his sadness.
or he could limit the expression of his anger, in order to appear lovable and to be abandoned.
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Autism
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Autism (Bleuler and Kanner - curled into himself)
Self sufficient
Happy if left alone
As if in a shell
Lack of relational reaction
Echolalia (“you” instead of “me” ...)
Obsession that something could change in the environment
Isolated special abilities
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According to Asperger
Fluent talking
Difficulties in gross movement instead of fine
Ability to learn in a abstract way instead of mechanical
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According to psychodynamic theories (Bettelheim)
the child feels a mother’s “desire” to annihilate him
or that it could be better if he had never existed
or a more general sense of total annihilation from the world around him
autism could be seen as a defensive strategy to this
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Later on was presened an organic approach (Goldstein -
as a secondary defensive strategy, caused by an organic deficit
trying to save himself from unendurable anguish
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then a cognitive model ... (Frith)
inability to understand the thoughts of others
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Wing and Gould discovered 3 categories
Aloof (isolated)
Passive (in their relationship with the external world)
Odd (socially active but incongruent and bizarre)
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the symptoms ...Verbal and not verbal communication (echolalia - 70% are mentally retarded)
Social interaction (emotional indifference, hyperexcitability, difficult visual contact, difficulties in respecting their turn in a conversation ... sometimes as if they have hearing problems ...)
Imagination (poor repertory of interests, stereotypical behavior, abstraction from reality)
Order (phobic)
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Often those symptoms change during the development of the child.Often those symptoms hide a good intelligence or even extraordinary abilities.
In the last 50 years the concept of autism changed a lot: from a unique syndrome to a series of symptoms pointing to different problems.
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Before it was classified as a precocious psychosis.Now it is part of the
developmental problems with an organic component.
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