Positive Parenting 0 – 7 years

Health Commission of Australiahas found in 2004:

• 56 children under 4 on anti‐depressants

• 728 children aged between 5‐9 on anti‐depressants

• 4,689 aged between 10‐14 on anti‐depressants

• Nationally prescriptions for people under 19 topped more than 250,000

Some Facts for Kids• 3 % of all 3 year olds have severe tantrums

• 10 % of all parents of children 2-5 years ask for help with behavior problems

• Anti-social behavior accounts for 30-40% of referrals to child mental health services

What has disappeared?

• Gentle touch and games• Fairy tales• Being “present” not just in the room• Playing real hands on games• Games in the car• Human conversation with real people• Simple toys that don’t cost money• Less parent direction

Terrifying Truth

• I am the decisive element in the life of a child.• I create so many souls like me.• I have tremendous power to make a

child’s life joyous or miserable.• I can be an agent of change.• Pakistan can become a better or

worse place because of me.• My Mission Correlates with that of the PROPHETS.

What tends to be your goals ordesires in parenting?• Goals: _____________________• Desires: ____________________

What are your greatest strugglesin parenting?!Answers:• ___________________________• ___________________________

C Fوا OذMينH ءHامHن ل ا R يH TUأ Hـ ٱي ہ�

F Mيك ل H F وHأ ك HسFنفH C أ م�قFوTا م� م�ا Hا ��ن ر

At-Tahreem, 6

How important do you think it is to teach your children character building? (Pre-test)

How do you teach your children character building? – Pre-test

How often do you talk about character?

Social And Emotional Building Blocks

Longer term consequences of not intervening early

• Poor relationships with others

• Low resilience• Poor qualifications and work

history• Low frustration tolerance • Easily upset and see “threat”

everywhere • Greater involvement in

antisocial behaviour and drug misuse

• Families who feel let down, upset, angry or powerless.

10 Characteristics of Great Parents

1. Mindful parent (vision for their children) 2. Authoritative parenting style3. Understand child temperament4. Involved in child’s life5. Think Win-Win with their children (rules) 6. Co-parent well7. Consistent8. Avoid harsh discipline9. Explain decisions10.Respect

Traits of Authoritative Parents

• Clear limits and boundaries• Be firm but flexible• Good communication• Do many fun things together• Let child be an individual

Principles of Discipline

• Have a few clear rules• Speak simply• Be “blas锕 Be the boss• Be warmly involved• Give only one warning• Don’t get into power struggles• Set expectations and outcomes

prior to events/challenges

Positive Parenting

• Parent with a plan

• Parent in freedom, not fear

• Parent with affection, but not softness

• Parent with authority, but not coercion

• Parent by being an awesome person

There is a mass of research to demonstrate that the more touch a child gets in childhood, the calmer and less fearful he is likely to be in adulthood....

Link child to Allah Ta’ala

Raise according to Quran and SunnahBe right role model Provide Islamic environment Paint right picture of Allah Ta’alaStories of Rasulillah (SAW) and SahabahUltimate Authority is Allah Ta’ala

Hال OىH Fن Uب Hـ HعMظFهF  ي MهM وHهFوH ي ن M UنF ل مHـ F M قHالH ل ۥوHإ ۦ م� ٱ م م�مw عHظMي FظH كH ل zلش OنM O إ Mلل رM ب F ��ت ر م� م� ٱ ه�‌� ٱ م� م�

Early Childhood

Medical Behavior Discipline Tarbiya Specific Issues

Eating habits Sibling Rivalry

Rule setting Choosing schools

Illness Developing Skills

Reasoning Fears

Preventative Measures

Reading Positive strokes

Writing Communication

Simple Chores

Activity

• In groups of three or four prepare a case study or story that you faced and now fit it with the parenting style.

Bachey Jannat key phool!