Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Dual Relationships: Balancing Your Role as Leader and Friend

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Objectives

Participants will receive tips for first time bosses

Participants will list four strategies for transitioning from peer to boss

Participants will utilize an assessment tool to determine the strength of their team

Participants will learn the four stages of group dynamics and the management strategies to use for each stage

Participants will explore the special challenges of dual relations

Participants will use the Departure Risk Matrix to determine team engagement

Participants will list eight strategies managers, both new and seasoned, use to be effective

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Introduction

Patrick Shaul, ACSW, LCSW

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

The Role of the Supervisor

Manager „man ij er

1. A person who directs a team or athlete

2. One in charge of the business affairs or

training of a group

See also Circus Juggler

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

The Role of a Supervisor

Juggling many roles, resources, projects,

priorities and problems

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Number one function

Zig Ziglar - to bring individuals together as a

team

Ken Blanchard – “to gradually increase the

competence and confidence of your people

so that you can begin to use less time

consuming styles and still get high quality

results”

Don Shula – manager = coach

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Know Thyself

Know why you want to supervise others

Zig Ziglar – Management assumptions +

management attitude = management

behavior

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Theories of management

Theory X – Frederick Taylor, Negative

management assumptions

Theory Y – Douglas McGregor, Positive

management assumptions

Theory Z – Dr. William Ouchi

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Theory X

Negative Management Assumptions

Employees are expenses, not investments

Control must be centralized

Management‟s primary duty is to control costs, monitor employee work methods, and assure immediate productivity or profit

Workers are basically unmotivated and probably dishonest

There is the one best (standardized) way of performing any job

Subordinates are assumed to dislike work

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Theory Y

Positive Management Assumptions

Work is as natural as play

People are committed and creative

Subordinates are willing to work

People accept responsibility

Employees are capable of intrinsic self direction and control

People are adept at creativity and innovation

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Theory Z

Decision making is typically consensual and

participative

There is a broad concern for the well being

of employees as a natural part of a working

relationship

Flexibility and freedom are intrinsic

Workers work without close supervision

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Transitioning from peer to leader

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Four strategies

1. Accept your new role

2. Set clear boundaries

3. Communicate

4. Take action

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Accept Your Leadership Role

1. How the organization values you has

changed

2. Different duties

3. Changed relationships and allegiances

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Accept Your Leadership Role

Become a “learning machine”

Do your job – not your employees‟ job

Lead by example

Avoid finger pointing

Accept responsibility

When in doubt, ask

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Set Clear Boundaries

Clarify expectations

- What you expect of employees

- What they can expect from you

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Set Clear Boundaries

Clarify any changes to policies, procedures and operations

The importance of consistency

Don‟t …

- let personal feelings sidetrack you from

establishing boundaries and enforcing rules

- let friends come before business

- assume that saying something once is enough or

that “everyone already knows”

- share privileged or confidential information with

direct reports who are not in the “need to know”

capacity

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Communicate

Inform

Instruct

Learn

Clarify

Coach

Motivate

Receive and

understand

Correct

Commend

Listen

WIIFM

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Communicate

I never said you stole the money

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Take Action

The ultimate criteria for measuring

management effectiveness is results

Three types of actions

1. Problem solving

2. Implementation/Execution

3. Decision Making

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Advice & ideas for new supervisors

Accept the change

Be upfront and honest with people

Expect your relationships to change

Establish a new peer group

Be yourself

Don‟t let your feelings get hurt

Admit mistakes

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Advice & ideas for new supervisors

Don‟t pull any punches

Stand your ground

Help others to be more valuable

Use clear communication

Don‟t play favorites

Don‟t wait for things to happen

Do what you say you‟re going to do

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

How advice and ideas help

It helps you focus on the future

It allows you to gain credibility as a

manager/supervisor

It helps others trust you in your new role

It reduces the chance that your new

employees will “test” you

It helps establish you as “the boss”

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

How advice and ideas can help

It helps you gain the confidence of your former peers/new employees

It helps you get off on the “right foot” with everyone

It sends the message that you‟re there to support your employees

It helps you set new team norms

It establishes you as a “fair” boss

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

How advice and ideas can help

It minimizes confusion

It helps others perform at their best

It helps you get things done, which helps

your manager feel like he/she made a good

choice in selecting you!

Strategy What it Means Why it’s Important

Accept Your New Role Understand that your

responsibilities have changed

and increased and that your

relationships with former

peers are different

Establishes you as the boss;

helps you deal with the

change; helps you get on with

doing the new job; helps with

your self esteem

Set Clear Boundaries Make sure that your new

employees understand the

rules and limits of your new

working relationship with

them

Establishes the rules for

working together so that

things go more smoothly;

establishes you as being in

charge

Communicate Send clear messages and

listen effectively

Allows for clarify of direction,

responsibilities, expectations

and information

Take Action Take the initiative to get

things done

Helps you get the results for

which you are accountable

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Balancing your role as leader and friend

Three key strategies

1. Communicate

2. Set limits/boundaries

3. Be aware of the situation

Balancing Your Role as Leader and Friend

Challenges

1. Former peers now report to you

2. Social situations, for example schools, churches, recreation

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Stages of Group Development

Forming

Storming

Norming

Performing

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Forming

Group Dynamics

Discomfort of a new

situation

Polite and impersonal

relationships

Testing

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Forming

Group Dynamics

Discomfort of a new

situation

Polite and impersonal

relationships

Testing

Manager’s Tasks

Directing

Setting Goals and

Vision

Team Assessment

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Storming

Group Dynamics

Tension and conflict

Adolescents

Creative

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Storming

Group Dynamics

Tension and conflict

Adolescents

Creative

Manager’s Tasks

Coaching

Telling and Listening

Solicit Suggestions

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Norming

Group Dynamics

Building cohesion

Increased order

Rules of behavior

Team identity

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Norming

Group Dynamics

Building cohesion

Increased order

Rules of behavior

Team identity

Manager’s Tasks

Support, Encourage

and Praise

Share Decision Making

(Listen)

Facilitate Group

Interaction

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Performing

Group Dynamics

Climate of support

Focused energy

Functional relationships

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Performing

Group Dynamics

Climate of support

Focused energy

Functional relationships

Manager’s Tasks

Delegate

Reinforce Group‟s

Decisions

Guide

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Moving through the stages

Tell employees what to do

Show employees what to do (coaching)

Risk taking by employees

Observe (supporting)

Praise

Forming

Storming

Norming

Performing

Forming

Polite

Impersonal

Guarded

Testing

Figuring things out

Storming

Power struggles

Conflict control

Cliques

Opting out

Feeling stuck

In-fighting

Performing

Mature

Supportive

Flexible

Productive

Open, even in

difficult situations

Norming

Clarifying roles

Getting organized

Giving feedback

Becoming cohesive

Developing how to

problem solve

Stages of team development

Forming

Introductions

Expectations

Ground rules

Boundaries and

structure

Storming

Raise issues and

resolve conflicts

Listen

Help team learn how to

work together

Performing

Celebrate successes

Set new targets

Mentor

Norming

Reflect on group‟s

progress

Share insights and

observations

Analyze tasks and

roles

Stages of team development/Manager‟s tasks

Forming Storming Norming Performing

Key Issues Forming trust Who has power,

authority, control

Feeling valued

and appreciated

Satisfaction with

roles and

progress

Key Concerns Why are we

here?

What role will I

play?

Will I fit in?

Will we get tasks

done?

Will we work

together?

How do I fit in?

How do you fit in?

Will we work well

together?

What have we

accomplished?

What else can we

do?

How can we do it

better?

Things to do Introductions

Ground rules

Clarify function,

mission & tasks

Teach/experience

group process

Learn roles

Teach decision

making

Share feedback

Evaluate team

and individual

progress

Celebrate

success

Set new targets

Redesign and

improve

processes

Leader tasks Provide safety,

structure and

boundaries

Share

responsibility and

authority

Provide safe

ground for

feedback

Share insights

and observations

Share information

Coach and

mentor

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Leadership styles

Directing

Coaching

Supporting

Delegating

Leadership style is a combination of directing

and supportive behavior

Development Level of the Group Leadership Style

Low Competence

High Commitment

Some Competence

Low Commitment

High Competence

Variable Commitment

High Competence

High Commitment

Development Level of the Group Leadership Style

Low Competence

High Commitment

Directing

Structure, control & supervise

Some Competence

Low Commitment

Coaching

Direct & Support

High Competence

Variable Commitment

Supporting

Praise, Listen & facilitate

High Competence

High Commitment

Delegating

Turn over responsibility

for day to day operations

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Situational Leadership

The ability to change your style depending

on the person you are working with and the

task

Leader may use more than one style with

different employees and/or different styles

with the same employee for various tasks

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Three skills needed for leadership

Flexibility – changing your style

Diagnostic skills – assesses your team

individually and collectively

Contracting on goals

Leader Manager

May or may not have official appointment

to the position. Can be an informal leader

Have power and authority to enforce

decisions only so long as followers are

willing to be led

Influence others toward goal setting,

either formally or informally

Interested in risk taking and exploring

new ideas

Relate to people personally in an intuitive

and empathetic manner

May or may not be successful as

managers

One who inspires people to do the right

thing in a timely manner

Are appointed officially to the position

Have power and authority to enforce

decisions

Carry out predetermined policies, rules

and regulations

Maintain an orderly, controlled, rational

and equitable structure

Relate to people according to their roles

Feel rewarded when fulfilling

organizational mission or goals

Are managers as long as the appointment

holds

One who directs people to do things right

in a timely manner

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

He who leads but has no followers is only taking a walk

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Assessing your team

The Departure Risk Matrix

-Healthcare Advisory Board

HIGH IMPACTMEDIUM

IMPACTLOW IMPACT

HIGH

DEPARTURE

RISK

1 2

MEDIUM

DEPARTURE

RISK

3 4

LOW

DEPARTURE

RISK

High Departure Risk

Unexplained absenteeism or tardiness

Disengagement

Formal complaint

Behavior change

Performance covers

Dissatisfaction with performance review

Newly assigned responsibilities

Life-changing event

Interviewing elsewhere

Poor relationships with colleagues

Significant institutional or environmental changes

Source: Advisory Board Company.

H*Works Recruitment and Retention Database, 2001, Advisory Board Interviews

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Tracking Risks/Impact

Strategies

1. Talk with employees

2. Listen

3. Match strengths with tasks

4. Recognition

5. Gallup Organizations Q-12 questions

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Gallup Q 12

Do you know what is expected of you at work?

Do you have the materials and equipment you need to do your work right?

At work, do you have the opportunity to do what you do best every day?

In the last seven days, have you received recognition or praise for doing good work?

Does your supervisor, or someone at work, seem to care about you as a person?

Is there someone at work who encourages your development?

At work, do your opinions seem to count?

Does the mission/purpose of your company make you feel your job is important?

Are your associates (fellow employees) committed to doing quality work?

Do you have a best friend at work?

In the last six months, has someone at work talked to you about your progress?

In the last year, have you had opportunities at work to learn and grow?

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Employee Engagement

The Engaged Employee

The Not-Engaged Employee

The Actively Disengaged Employee

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

The Engagement Index

The Engaged Employee

Use their talents daily

Consistently high levels of performance

Emotionally committed to what they do

High energy and enthusiasm

Committed to work, company, role and colleagues

Intentionally builds supportive relationships

Challenges purpose to achieve goals

Natural innovation and drive for efficiency

Clear about desired outcomes of their role

Leader’s Role

Make employee aware of their strengths

Provide continuous feedback on how employee‟s strengths are used

“Clear the path” so that employee can do what they do best without unnecessary distractions

Build trust by showing commitment to employee‟s success

Give employee ownership and creation of outcomes

Challenge employee with their area of strength

Follow This Path, Coffman, Gonzales-Molina,

2002

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

The Engagement Index

The Not-Engaged Employee

Meets the basics

Confusion or inability to act with

confidence

Low-risk response and commitment

No real sense of achievement

Possible commitment to organization,

but not always to role or group

Will speak frankly about negative views

Leader’s Role

Review the demands of each role

Clarify the desired outcome of these

roles

Tweak the fit of the role if necessary. If

possible, move people into roles

that fit better

Be direct with employee and engage in

conversations about problem areas

Measure progress toward outcomes by

rating the performance – never the

person

Follow This Path, Coffman, Gonzales-Molina,

2002

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

The Engagement Index

The Actively Disengaged Employee

Low trust

“I‟m OK, everyone else is not”

Normal reaction starts with resistance

Inability to move from problems to solutions

Low commitment to company, work group or

role

Isolation

Won‟t speak frankly about negatives views

but will act out frustrations either overly

or covertly

Leader’s Role

Address the problem as soon as possible

Talk to the employee involved about how to

address the problem

Use direct language. Be specific. Use real

examples of behavior observed

Help the employee understand they need to

move out of the problem into solutions

Review talent fit for the role. Be honest with

yourself and the employee. Act swiftly to

find the right role. Create a plan

Create trust by talking more about outcomes

that about steps to get there

Follow This Path, Coffman, Gonzales-Molina,

2002

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Eight Universal Laws of Leadership

“The Stuff of Heroes: The Eight Universal

Laws of Leadership.” William Cohen. 1998.

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

1. Maintain absolute integrity

Keep your word

Chose the harder right over the easier wrong

Guard your principles

Do the right thing

An Effectiveness Leaders is...

0 5000 10000 15000

Courageous

Expertness

Motivator

Model

Dedicated

Other

Decision Making

Caring

Visionary

People

Communicator

Integrity

Number surveyed: 54,000

Covey, 1999

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

2. Know your stuff

Know your people

Learn from the bottom up – become an

expert

Learn from every experience

Learn from your subordinates

Never stop learning

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

3. Declare your expectations

Get your expectations clear

Choose, don‟t juggle

Make your expectations compelling

Develop a plan. Write it down

Promote your expectations and implement your plan

Listen to feedback and adjust your strategy as

needed

Be faithful to your expectations

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

4. Show uncommon commitment

Meet with your employees face-to-face

Keep going when the going gets tough

Think outside the box

Accept risk that go with commitment

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

5. Expect positive results

Develop your self confidence

Be true to yourself

Become a positive thinker

Visualize the results you want

Maintain your enthusiasm

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

6. Take care of your employees

Be the leader when things go wrong

Give employees needs a top priority

Recognize, appreciate and reward

Assume responsibility when things go wrong

Share the gain

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

7. Put duty before self

Focus on goals instead of personal gain

Rejoice in the success of others

Consider others before yourself

Share the pain

Demonstrate high morale courage

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

8. Get out in front

Go to where the action is

Set the example

Be willing to do anything you ask of your

employees

Take charge

Be an up-front leader

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

The Eight Universal Law

Without action,

the universal laws are worthless

Bibliography

Blanchard, Kenneth, Zigarmi, Patricia & Zigarmi, Drea, Leadership and the One Minute Manager, William Morrow and Company, Inc., New York, NY 1985.

Blanchard, Kenneth, Carew, Donald & Paris-Carew, Eunice, The One Minute Manager Builds High Performance Teams, William Morrow & Company, Inc., New York, NY 1990.

Blanchard, Kenneth, Mission Impossible, McGraw & Hill, NY, NY 1997.

Coffman, Curt and Gonzales-Molina, Gabriel. Follow this Path: How the World‟s Greatest Organizations Drive Growth by Unleashing Human Potential. 2002.

Cohen, William A., The Stuff of Heroes: The Eight Universal Laws of Leadership, Longstreet Press, Atlanta, GA 1998.

Cohen, William A., The Art of the Leader, Prentice-Hall, Englewood Cliffs, NJ, 1990.

Covey, Stephen, R., The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, A Fireside Book, Simon & Schuster, NY, NY 1989.

Healthcare Advisory Board, Washington, DC.. 2001.

Henry, Sue, Group Skills in Social Work, 2nd edition, Brooks/Cole Publishing Co., Pacific Grove, CA 1992.

http://www.workforce.com/section/hr-management/article/12-questions-measure-employee-engagement.html retrieved August 31,2011.

VisionPoint Productions, Inc. 2004

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

Patrick Shaul, LCSW

pjshaul@gmail.com

770-289-9966