Marriage cannot survive without a servant’s heart for

Tuesday, April 11, 2023

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MARRIAGE CANNOT SURVIVE WITHOUT A

SERVANT’S HEART FOR EACH OTHER

“You have to lose in order to gain. You don’t come into

marriage to be served but to serve”


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To have a marriage that will last, you must have a Servant's Heart for each other .

One with a servant’s heart will consider the will of others over their own will and desires.

Now this is the part that gets down to the real daily issues that all of our marriages face.


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John 15:9-17 "As the Father has loved me, so have I

loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.


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You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit--fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. This is my command: Love each other. (NIV)


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A. What Is a Servant 's Heart? 1. In Ephesians 5 the Bible

makes very clear that wives are to submit to their husbands. Husbands really love this but in the same passage is another statement.

2. The Scripture also points out that we are to love one another as Christ loved the Church.


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3. Paul makes it very simple that if both partners would fulfill their responsibility then both partners would want to submit and both would have a servant’s heart and be willing to serve one another.

4. In the passage we realize this is for all Christians especially those who are married.


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5. So what is a servant's heart? It is one who will consider the will of others over their own will and desires. How can you practice that on a daily basis?


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B. When Did You Have One? 1. This shows the big

difference between dating and marriage.

2. When you understand this, then you can see why so many couples get a divorce.


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3. Before a couple marries, they have a servant 's heart to the person they want to marry and as soon as the wedding ceremony is over, they want to kick their feet up and expect everything to be done for them. This is very common amongst the African men. They want to be served. They married to be served. That they are there to be served. This is against scriptures.


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4. Think back to when you first married:

a. Isn't that true? b. Try hard to think. During courting and just

before marriage the man was a servant, willing to do anything to please the woman.


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5. That is when you had the servant 's heart. You did before you married your companion


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C. What Makes Us Lose It? 1. As soon as the marriage is

over, or when the vows have been said, some are over as soon as they say I do.

2. For some reason after the marriage we leave the servant’s heart behind.

3. Why do we lose it? We forget who we are — a servant.


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D. How Do You Regain It? 1. Be willing to make a choice. a. Start loving your spouse, not

just yourself. b. Quit questioning about whose

job it is to do certain things. c. A true servant 's heart does

not get all upset by saying, “That 's your job and this is my job.”


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that prevent a servant’s heart.

e. Quit drawing lines and quit being a legalist.

f. Quit keeping score on one another.

1 Corinthians 13:5 “Love is not rude, it is not

self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs”. (NIV)


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Servants are not to be score keepers.

g. When you love your companion love them like Christ loves the church.

h. Quit worrying about your image and worrying what people will say when they see you serving your spouse. Be there for each other and help each other.


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2. Openly tell it to your companion. They need to hear it from you.

3. Confess the lack of it. 4. With God 's help, practice

living your life for your companion.


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SURELY

You are a somebody in Christ; a servant for others and especially for your spouse.

Is there enough evidence to convict you that you are a servant of those in your house?


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FINALLY

It is my prayer and throwing a challenge to married people to understand that marriage can only last for a life time when we devoid the spirit of ‘ I am the boss’ and let Christ spirit in us be like him, A SERVANT.

Let ' s pray a prayer of commitment to God and handle our spouses as being servants to them.

Marriage cannot survive without a servant’s heart for

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