Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation...

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Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? Or…How To Get What You Want

Transcript of Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation...

Page 1: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

Is Negotiation a Man’s Game?

Or…How To Get What

You Want

Page 2: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

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In-house training programmes

Coaching

Consulting and Advisory

Pro-Bono

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We would love to hear your

thoughts…

Feel free to tweet

@AdvSpringCEO

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YOU

Colleagues

Boss

Partner

ChildrenWider family

Contractors and Service Providers

Customers

Ourselves

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Negotiation is…

Two or more parties resolving differences

to try to reach agreement

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Some Common

Negotiation

Mistakes…

Page 9: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

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Trying to avoid negotiation

Thinking it’s about winning

Assuming everyone shares

your values

Page 10: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

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Negotiation

is a necessary ritual

It’s part of our DNA

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Trying to avoid negotiation

Thinking it’s about winning

Assuming everyone shares

your values

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SATISFIED

How do you want the other

party to feel after

negotiating with you?

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Trying to avoid negotiation

Thinking it’s about winning

Assuming everyone shares

your values

Page 14: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

The behaviours of negotiators

The values of society

Caring

Considerate

Co operative

Dependable

Fair

Generous

Honest

Open

Rational

Reliable

Truthful

Unselfish

Willing

Arrogant

Closed

Dishonest

Emotional

Inconsiderate

Indifferent

Irrational

Mean

Rejecting

Selfish

Unfair

Unreasonable

Unreliable

Untruthful

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So what should we

be doing?

Page 16: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

Discover

Establish

Ask

Lead

Seal it!

Page 17: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

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Page 18: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

The most powerful phrase in

negotiation

If you…

Then I…

Page 19: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

Move beyond the

obvious to offer

solutions

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DeadlineLeave

entitlement

Overtime

Flexible working

Disciplinary procedure

Joint statement

Total Value

Page 21: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

Nothing is agreed

until everything is

agreed

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NOIs just the starting

point

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And don’t underestimate the need to ‘save face’

See the world through their eyes…

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We don’t ask and we don’t aim high enough when we

do

Women are viewed more negatively if

they ‘ask’

We are more effective at

negotiating for others

So…Is it a Man’ Game?

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Page 26: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

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We don’t ask and we don’t aim high enough when we

do

Women are viewed more negatively if

they ‘ask’

We are more effective at

negotiating for others

So…Is it a Man’ Game?

Page 27: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

• Carnegie Mellon University Starting Salary Study – 7% women negotiated compared to 57% of men = $4,000 difference

• Boggle Research - $3-$10 dollars for taking part – offered $3 at the end as standard… Men 9 times more likely to push back

• US Open – Women players 80% less likely to dispute a close line call

TIP: Negotiate! And

be ambitious

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We don’t ask and we don’t aim high enough when we

do

We are more effective at

negotiating for others

Women are viewed more negatively if

they ‘ask’

So…Is it a Man’ Game?

Page 29: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

• US Legislators and Constituents Research

• Harvard Research – Female Executives secure higher bonuses for their teams than Male Executives

TIPS:

Professor Neale – ‘Husband, Horses,

Chickens’ Embrace it!

Dr Lois Frankel tweeted to ‘put the

same effort into representing

ourselves’

Page 30: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

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We don’t ask and we don’t aim high enough when we

do

Women are viewed more negatively if

they ‘ask’

We are more effective at

negotiating for others

So…Is it a Man’ Game?

Page 31: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

• Social penalty for women that negotiate…

• Deemed as ‘unfeminine’ behaviours

• Impact on likeability? – Liked v Respected

• Effective planning can help manage this

• Have your business case ready

• The aggressive/ assertive dilemma

TIP: Just Ask… but do it in the right way and challenge the perceptions held

by men… and women

Page 32: Is Negotiation a Man’s Game? - WEConnect Europe · 2015-11-09 · Some Common Negotiation Mistakes ... Trying to avoid negotiation Thinking it’s about winning Assuming everyone

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And the biggest mistake?

Underestimating

the impact of

PEOPLE

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Know the facts, numbers, statistics, precedents, regulations, trends…

But don’t forget the PEOPLE.

Negotiation is also about how we interact, behave, react, view each other, test each other,

perceive each other and how confident we feel… and that can make all the difference

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Natalie Reynolds

Founder and CEO

[email protected]@advantagespring.com

www.advantagespring.com

@AdvSpring@AdvSpringCEO

Natalie ReynoldsadvantageSPRING