Growing Up in Zambia - Listen To My Story

Growing up in Zambia

Listen to my storyGrowing up in Zambia

Listen to my story

Listen to My Story

© Camfed 2008

First published in Great Britain in 2008 by Camfed

Camfed Zambia

13 Lubwa Road

Rhodes Park

PO Box 51354

Lusaka

Zambia

Camfed International

22 Millers Yard

Mill Lane

Cambridge

CB2 1RQ

UK

www.camfed.org

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or

transmitted in any form, or by any means, electrical, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise

without the written prior permission of the publishers.

Design and layout by Mousetank Ltd. Photography by Jaimie Gramston and Mark Read © Camfed.

Images are illustrative in order to protect the privacy of the storytellers.

Printed on recycled paper to protect the environment.

This publication has been entirely funded by the UK Department for International Development


Listen to my story

6

I feel greatly honoured to have been asked to write this foreword,

and to speak out for girls’ and women’s education in Zambia.

Women and girls play an important nurturing role in the life of

individuals, families, communities and nations. However, for women

to fulfil this role effectively, they have to be supported by a good

system of education and training. Unfortunately, the provision of

education for all is an expense beyond not only the budgets of

most families, but also of most African countries. Even countries

committed to the principle of education for all are often unable to

fulfil the obligations embedded in that principle for lack of funding.

The result has been that families choose to educate boys at the

expense of girls, a situation that compounds the problem. It will

take a long time for Africa to become self-sufficient in this area of

endeavour. The imperative for countries like Zambia is to openly

acknowledge the catalytic role that international organisations can

play, and to support them in strategic partnerships with indigenous

organisations that espouse similar principles. Such an approach

will boost the number of self-aware, confident women who are

able to enter the workforce, and who are critical partners in the

development and transformation of the whole nation.

My message to those who read this book is: make use of it, and

share its contents with others who may not be as privileged as you

are to hold a copy themselves. Also remember that you do not have

to be a genius to succeed. I am proof of that maxim. Through dint

of hard work, I became a Permanent Secretary in the Cabinet Office;

an accredited Ambassador to numerous countries; a Permanent

Representative to the United Nations and simultaneously, a President

of the United Nations Council for Namibia. I have founded a political

party – the Social Democratic Party – and I have stood for election as

President of Zambia, challenging the population to consider female

leadership of their country.

Nothing is impossible when a young woman determines to conquer,

one by one, all the impediments in her way. My own personal

experience confirms this.

Ambassador Gwendoline Konie

Foreword

6 Listen to My Story

Nothing is impossible when a young woman determines to conquer, one by one, all the impediments in her way.

Listen to My Story 7

8

The people who have contributed their stories to this book have a

common belief – everyone has talents and everyone has a right to

discover and use them. As the powerful stories in this book show

only too well, finding your talent, believing in yourself and pursuing

every opportunity to achieve your best can change your life and the

future for your family, community and country.

Every person has great potential, and every person has a story to tell,

if only we take the time to sit and listen. Within these pages, you

can read the stories of young people who represent the future of

Zambia – young people who have often faced incredible hardships

and challenges early on in their lives. Some have lost their parents.

Others have been abused. Many have been prevented from going to

school by the barriers of poverty and inequality. But many of them

have also overcome incredible odds to achieve amazing things.

One writer, Leah, shares her memory of neighbours and villagers

telling her father that sending his daughter to secondary school was

like “investing in the wind” – because society regarded education

as something for boys rather than girls. But today Leah has proved

the villagers wrong. Harnessing the power of the wind to fill her

own sails, she passed all her school exams, studied to become a

teacher at the University of Zambia and now travels the world as an

education expert.

Leah tells us: “Education is the only way that we can change our

destiny”. The unifying theme in these stories is that education has

the power to transform lives. Or, as another writer, Mwangala, says,

“I still believe the sky is the limit”.

Be inspired by Leah, Mwangala and the other writers who tell their

stories in this book. Find your talent and reach for the stars.

All of us at Camfed very much appreciate the financial support of the

UK Department for International Development in the production of

this book and accompanying materials. We would also like to thank

the Ministry of Education and all the teachers and pupils across

rural communities of Zambia who have given so much of their time

and experience in the book’s making. You will meet many of them

through the photographs and words that follow.

Barbara Chilangwa

Executive Director, Camfed Zambia

Former Permanent Secretary, Ministry of Education

Introduction


It is a pleasure for me to add my voice to the voices of these young people who send a strong message about the importance of education.


10

Chapter One

Education for All


For Camfed, ‘education for all’ means that all children, not only the academically gifted, wealthy or able-bodied, must be given the chance to complete their education in a safe environment. Our work in rural communities of Africa is underpinned and guided by the principle that education is a basic human right and all children must have access, only then can the potential that is in every child shine through societies.

Ann Cotton, Founder & Executive Director, Camfed

Education is the best way to break the cycle of ill health, hunger and poverty.

Kailash Satyarthi, Chairperson, Global Campaign for Education


It is not always people distantly related to us who perpetrate our

abuse or mistreatment. I have heard about children suffering at their

parents’ hands, or their grandparents’ hands. Love is an important

ingredient in a child’s upbringing.

I found this out the hard way when I stayed with my sister. She is

older than me and she works as a teacher in Mwense. When she

came home to visit the family in Samfya I was so impressed by her

that I begged to go and live with her. I thought life would be fun

and interesting, better than the poverty at home. My parents were

hesitant, but I managed to persuade them to let me go with her.

It wasn’t what I expected at all. She treated me badly, making me

work like a maid in her house. When I asked her to take me to

school she refused and got angry with me. I had to beg and plead

until she gave in, but even then she would find things for me to do,

just at the last minute when I was ready to leave for school. It made

me always late, and I got in trouble when I arrived at class. Even

when I did go to school, it was useless because I could do nothing.

I had no books and no writing materials. I would just sit there

watching my friends working.

In the end, I couldn’t take it any more and I wrote to my father

asking him to take me home. When he came my sister was surprised

and pretended things were fine. She was ashamed and didn’t want

him to know what she had been doing. For me, getting home was

the main thing. I learnt to appreciate what I had, and thankfully I

was identified by Camfed and supported in my schooling in Samfya

– something that could not have happened if my parents had had to

manage it alone.

Lillian

Love is an important ingredient in a child’s upbringing. I found this out the hard way...


A caption can go here and her and here


14

I am writing this because I am a disabled person. When I was two

months old, I became very ill. My mother took me to the health

centre that was closest to our home and because of the seriousness

of my condition I was then transferred to Lubwe Hospital before

being released to go home.

When I was 7 years old, I asked my parents, “When am I going to

start my Grade 1?” They told me I could not go to school because

of the way I am. “You will not do anything and the other pupils will

laugh at you.” That is what they said.

When I was 10 years old, again I asked my parents to take me to

school. My father still refused, but my mother gave in and took me

to school so that I could start Grade 1. I remember very well that the

majority of the people were laughing at me. Their laughter did not

Jonathan

I remember very well that the majority of the people were laughing at me... I was too happy to be in school to allow their mockery to affect me.

touch me. I was too happy to be in school to allow their mockery to

affect me.

I did well. When I was in Grade 5 I was moved up to Grade 6

because I was too advanced for the lower class. In Grade 6 the head

teacher suggested that I should sit for the Grade 7 examination. I

passed the exams and I was selected for Grade 8. After that I was

offered a place at Samfya High School for my senior secondary

school education.

I am grateful to my mother who decided to put me in school

against all the opposition she faced. Parents should not be afraid

to take their children to school, no matter what the odds seem

to be. Everyone has a talent and everyone can contribute to the

development of the country.


18

I am the ninth born in a family of 13 children, nine boys and four

girls. In our family there are two pairs of twins. I am a twin, born

with a girl, who died when I was very little.

Because of poverty, my mother failed to take all my brothers to

school, except my eldest sister who managed to finish. My mother

used to brew and sell local beer in order to raise money.

When I was selected to Grade 8 at Samfya High School, it was

difficult for my mother to find money for school fees. I spent

the whole of the first term at home. However, I have come to

understand that nothing that is good comes by itself. In spite of

everything, my mother has been so encouraging. She always says,

“Being poor is not something that can stop someone from getting

educated. What is important is hard work and determination that

come from deep inside oneself“.

The only person who is educated in our family is my sister. She has

taken on the responsibility of taking care of the whole family. She

has been my inspiration. I intend to work hard at school and become

a better and responsible citizen.

Alfred

Being poor is not something that can stop someone from getting educated. What is important is hard work and determination that come from deep inside oneself.


20

Both my parents died when I was three years old, and so from a

young age I lived with my brother and his wife. My brother worked

as a driver, and you know how that is – he was often away from

home for a week at a time. When he wasn’t there my sister-in-law

treated me very badly. She stopped my schooling, gave me many

chores to do and did not give me enough food.

One day I refused to wash plates and she beat me so badly that I

had to be taken to hospital. I was unconscious for two days. After

three weeks I was discharged from the hospital. After that I moved

to my grandparents’ home, and although they were kind to me,

going to school was difficult because the school was 12km away.

Sometimes my grandfather would take me on his bicycle. Most

times, though, I went to school on foot and I was always late. At

that school, if one was late, one was told to make 100 bricks. This

was hard punishment, but I used to do it.

When I reached Grade 8 there was no money for the fees so I

dropped out. I missed a full year before I found support for my

school fees and was able to go back, but I had to go to Grade 7.

When you are older than almost all your classmates, you are laughed

at. But when you are poor, this does not bother you. It drives you

to work harder to get a good education. No one laughs when a

successful person says he or she was once very poor.

Kingfred

No one laughs when a successful person says he or she was once very poor.


22

Life changed overnight when my father was involved in a road accident.

He lost his memory. For nineteen years he did not recognise anyone: his

family, his friends and his colleagues. Life became unbearable for him

and for us because he did not know what was happening in his life.

My father was retired on medical grounds. We now faced a lot of

challenges because my mother was a housewife with no income of

her own. We were living in a company house, which we were asked to

leave. The company did not even give my mother enough notice for her

to look for a suitable place to move to. She had no option but to return

to her home village in the Northern Province. To make matters worse,

my father’s terminal benefits were minimal as he had worked only for a

few years for the company.

My mother started to perform so many difficult tasks. She had to take

care of my father, as well as raise the four of us single handedly. Being

the oldest child, I struggled to help my mother. The main struggle was

schooling but I persevered and did not give up.

My mother turned into a very strong woman who used to cultivate a

reasonable field of maize, though inputs such as fertilizer and seed were

difficult to acquire. She would later sell the maize to the Food Reserve

Agency. She also grew cassava, sweet potatoes, millet and other crops.

These sustained our lives. I know from my own experience that parents,

especially mothers, really love their children and will do everything

possible to ensure that their children remain in school and succeed in

life. That was my mother’s dream also. She used to struggle to raise

money to buy all our school requirements.

When I passed to go into Grade 8, my mother had no money at all.

She started selling the pieces of furniture my father had bought while

in employment. Every term she would sell one household item to raise

money for my education. She also started a small business selling

second-hand clothes, kapenta and other fish. These businesses did not

do well because people used to get things on credit but did not pay for

the items on time.

Through that struggle I managed to complete my secondary school

education. My hope was rekindled by my education. Education

taught me to be myself and gave me power over my life. Through

my education I have learnt to be confident, independent and

determined.

I obtained good results and I was enrolled at the Copperbelt

Teachers’ College, although my training fees were too high for my

mother to pay. My uncle helped pay for me throughout the course

and I graduated with a Diploma in Education. After I completed

my course I started to work and I helped my siblings to finish their

secondary school education and college as well. Only the last born is

still in school.

It was my prayer that we all finish school, start working and help my

mother to look after our father. Unfortunately, our beloved father died

in September 2005. As for my mother, her prayers were answered. We

are all settled after a very long struggle. Life has changed completely,

and things are good for all of us. Education is the only key to a

successful life.

Sharon

My hope was rekindled by my education. Education taught me to be myself and gave me power over my life.


26

Chapter Two

Overcoming Challenges for Education


As we know from long and indisputable experience, investing in women and girls has a multiplier effect on productivity and sustained economic growth. No measure is more important in advancing education and health, including the prevention of HIV/AIDS. No other policy is as likely to improve nutrition, or reduce infant and maternal mortality.

Ban Ki-Moon, UN Secretary General

Enabling girls to attend school is literally a matter of life and death. Education, especially for girls and women, is the best way to break the cycle of ill health, hunger and poverty. Without it we can’t achieve the Millennium Development Goals.

Kailash Satyarthi, Chairperson, Global Campaign for Education


It is really incredible how many turns life can take.

When I was young my parents were doing well, and as children

we had nothing to worry about. My father was a senior manager

at his work and my Mum was a business lady. But my father

became ill, and despite an operation his health deteriorated until

his death in 2001.

My Mum became chief breadwinner, nurse to my father and of

course continued to be mother to the six of us. It was too much for

her to manage, and before we knew it we had to leave our home in

Sesheke and move to Nangweshi where my cousin had his home.

People were kind to us but life in the village was so different, and

we had to adjust – learning how to cultivate vegetables, living in

a thatched house. Most importantly for me, there was no high

school near us and although Mum assured me I would finish school

I couldn’t see any way for it to happen and I was desperate to know

what would happen. Apart from anything else, I couldn’t see how

Mum would ever afford the costs of my schooling. But my mother

is a resourceful lady and she found a way for me to start at Sioma

High School. I don’t think she knew how she would keep me there

once I had started.

Fortunately, when I was in Grade 10, Camfed was introduced at my

school and I was among the beneficiaries selected for the bursary

scheme. I was so excited and thanked God for the wonderful

opportunity. I promised myself that I would work extra hard to

complete my education. I was appointed head girl when I was in

Grade 11. I used this as an opportunity to encourage other girls to

study hard so that we can be better citizens.

From that time I have been able to go up and up. I joined Cama

after leaving school and through hard work I became the National

Coordinator and got a full-time position with the Camfed national

head office for Zambia. I now support my five siblings in school and I

have built my Mum a brick house which she loves.

Beside work, I am studying for a diploma in social work. I still believe

the sky is the limit. I will continue to study and work hard so that I

can have a decent life.

I would like to encourage girls to put education first. Their suffering

today will pave the way for a bright future. My sincere wish is to see

educated, young rural women who contribute to the development

of their community and country. I believe education, hard work,

determination and self-confidence are the only way to success.

Mwangala

I believe education, hard work, determination and self-confidence are the only way to success.


My mother died when I was four years old and my father died when

I was 16 years old. I am the fourth born in a family of ten. After my

mother’s death, my aunt took me to live with her in Shang’ombo

District.

When I was in Grade 9, I met a boy who told me that he loved

me. I started a relationship with him. I was still young and I didn’t

know what I was doing. I had friends who had boyfriends and they

encouraged me to have one as well. Eventually I became pregnant and

I continued with the relationship hoping that he would support me. I

continued with my education but unfortunately I didn’t do well in the

final exams because of the condition I was in.

When I gave birth to my child I was unable to go back to school

because there was no one to take care of my baby. Two years later I

was able to go back and repeat Grade 9 and was the only girl who

managed to qualify for Grade 10 from our school. My aunt tried to

raise some money to take me to school but she failed. It was then

that Camfed came to my school and I was identified as one of the

beneficiaries. But instead of taking my education seriously, I continued

to be playful.

When I was in Grade 11, I became pregnant again by a different

boy. I became a target of derision and fun poking. I decided to stop

schooling for a year to nurse my second baby. My aunt and teachers

were disappointed with me. Though my aunt was hurt, she never

stopped encouraging me to go back to school.

The head teacher called me one day and advised me to return to

school. I weaned my baby and went back to repeat Grade 11. The

teacher mentor used to spend a lot of time counselling me. She also

told me to forget what happened in the past and start a new life. I

realised that what I had done was very wrong.

When I completed my Grade 12, I put myself forward to become a

member of Cama – a network of young women linked to Camfed.

After some time, I was chosen to be the chairperson of Cama

for Shang’ombo District. I received a grant and started my own

business. I used to sell shoes and my business was doing so well that

I applied for a loan from Cama to expand it. I managed to support

my auntie and grandmother. I also managed to build my aunt a

house in appreciation of all she has done for me.

When my Grade 12 results were finally out, I had passed and

managed to get top marks. I was accepted to study at the University

of Zambia. I would tell myself, “Hard work Pays.” Now that I am

at university, I have become a source of inspiration to young rural

women in Shang’ombo District, rather than a source of derision.

I want to share my story with other people, especially school-going

girls and I have a message for you: I urge you to put more effort

in your studies and do not be cheated by boys who want to take

advantage of you when you are poor and vulnerable. I urge you all

to work hand in hand with other young women in the fight against

poverty. Let us all get started now, for we have a long way to go.

Mildred

At the times when life becomes a crossroads for young girls I did not know which road would be for me.


36

I can safely say that my early childhood was happy. I lived with my

mother, my father and four brothers in Ndola. I was the last born in

the family, and I was the only girl. Everyone spoilt me.

As children of the family, my brothers and I had nothing to worry

about. We had adequate food and we lived in a nice house. Life was

good to us. I attended primary school, and after Grade 7 I passed

the exams and was accepted into Grade 8.

Then my mother died.

My mother’s death was a shock. I knew she was often not well, but

when you are a child with the security of a home and family around

you, it doesn’t cross your mind that you can ever lose your mother. A

few months later, my father also died. Losing them both within such

a short period was too much for me to bear.

After my father had been buried, our relatives divided our

possessions between themselves and left us stranded. My brothers

stopped schooling immediately to look for jobs so that we could

have money to buy food. My brothers insisted that I stay on in

school. They promised that they would take care of me and get

me everything I needed for school. However, things got worse, not

better. My brothers couldn’t find decent jobs. They became dejected

and it was painful for me to see how much they were suffering to try

and cushion me from feeling our parents’ loss. I lost hope and I lost

interest in school.

One of my cousins in Samfya heard about our suffering. She sent for

me. When I got to Samfya I found that she had submitted my name

and I was on the Camfed programme. I could not believe that such

good fortune could come to me. Camfed has become my mother

and my father.

I hope and pray that every girl who has a second chance at

education will seize the opportunity with both hands. Such chances

are rare. Had I not been given this chance I don’t know where I

would be today. This act of kindness has changed my life.

Bronah

Had I not been given this chance I don’t know where I would be today. This act of kindness has changed my life.


Polygamy really hurt me and my mother. My Dad married a second

wife and not long afterwards he chased my mother and me away.

Mum and I had no other option but to look for another place to live.

We found a remote piece of land and started farming to support

ourselves. I stopped going to school because the school was too

far from where Mum and I were staying. I was only seven years old.

Whenever we needed to buy anything we had to walk to Mwense –

which was a distance of 49 kilometres.

For some reason, Dad changed his mind and one day he came for

us and we went back home. But soon after this he lost his job, and

with two wives and two families to support he couldn’t manage.

When I was accepted in Grade 8 I did not take up the offer because

we had no money.

I started looking for work to raise money for my school fees. I had to

go to different farms and meet people of all characters and manners.

I worked as a labourer. My family was very discouraging because

they were against my going to school. At the same time, having a

family meant that I could not qualify for any sponsorship – two living

parents are expected to support their children.

I am very bright at school but because of suffering I am often

tempted to give up. All I want is to continue with my education. For

me, it is the practice of polygamy that is to blame for my situation.

I am not the only one to have this experience in my life. Too many

children under one roof make life difficult for everyone and good for

no one.

Kabinda

Too many children under one roof make life difficult for everyone and good for no one.


Failing my Grade 9 exams meant that I had to find a husband at a

young age. I was so lucky to find a man who made me happy and I

moved to my husband’s home in Kitwe where we were blessed with

four children. It was an utter shock when I lost my husband to a sudden

illness. After his death, I had to go back home to Samfya. He was the

breadwinner for the family and I could not continue living in town.

My husband’s relatives grabbed all that he had left for me, and

I went back to the village with nothing. This caused me a lot of

pain and grief. My children were too young to understand our

predicament. I was not working and life became tough. To make

matters worse, my husband’s family accused me of being responsible

for his death.

I don’t know what would have happened to us if I had not joined

Cama. When the opportunity came I did not waste any time. I

rushed to register so that I could become a member. I received a

letter that told me I could attend Cama, and I said, “Is it me?” and I

ended up dancing and jumping. During the months that followed,

I became an active member and I was given a grant to start my

own business. My business is doing well and my life has improved.

I am able to take my children to school with less difficulty. They can

now have decent meals and clothes. No small thing when you have

started with nothing in your hands.

I have regained my self-esteem and my community respects me

again. I would like to encourage others not to lose hope.

Mary

I have regained my self-esteem and my community respects me again. I would like to encourage others not to lose hope.


Both my parents were teachers. As a result, even as a young child

I emerged from my mother’s kindergarten class armed with the

understanding that mothers and teachers must “probe a child’s mind

in order to increase that child’s thinking capacity”. In Bemba, this

saying is expressed as “Chalilinga uku konkonsha ku bongo bwa

mwana pakuti aba namano”.

My father’s philosophy followed that of the great Ghanaian

educationalist, Dr. James Aggrey of Achimota College. He shared the

firm belief that, “To educate a man is to educate an individual, but to

educate a woman is to educate the whole nation”. This philosophy

influenced both the boys and girls in my family, and it was perhaps

my father’s sense of humour to determine that we never forgot it by

naming my younger brother Aggrey, after his inspirational namesake.

The long and short of it was that I grew up with no hang-ups about

gender and ability – in spite of the prevailing paternalistic attitudes

of the time. This philosophy has stood me in good stead, perhaps

more than any other ability or advantage I may have had in life.

Ambassador Gwendoline Konie

To educate a man is to educate an individual, but to educate a woman is to educate the whole nation.


I am the third born in a family of six – four girls and two boys. When

I was young, my father was working for a construction company in

Kafue. Unfortunately, his job meant that we had to move around to

live at different building sites. This affected my schooling. I would

start Grade 1 at one site, then go back to pre-school because the

next site would have no primary school.

When I was in Grade 5, my paternal grandmother came to visit us.

My grandmother was a businesswoman. She lived with one of her

daughters, my father’s sister. She asked my father if she could take

me with her. She said I would go to school in Samfya because her

home was close to the school. My parents agreed.

I had been in school barely a week when my grandmother’s attitude

towards me changed. She told me I had to do all the household

chores before going to school. My own grandmother turned me into

a slave. The tasks I was made to do were far beyond my capability,

but she beat me up if I failed to do them. What made my suffering

worse was hunger. Each time food was prepared, my grandmother

would send me to fetch water or wash her clothes. While I was

gone, the two of them would eat all the food. I only got back in

time to wash the plates and pots that they had used.

My aunt would sometimes hide some food and give it to me secretly.

I used to watch dogs being fed by their owners and I would wonder

what would happen if I would run and get the food from the dogs.

Whenever I found a moment to rest I would look in the direction I

knew my parents to be and wonder how I could go back to them. It

was too far to walk, and I had no money to escape by bus.

One day, as usual, I was sent to fetch water as the two were about

to start eating. As I walked slowly towards the house, the heavy

container on my head making me look shorter, I saw my father

coming towards me. I thought I was dreaming. He took the container

from my head, and both of us were crying. He told me to pack my

things and we left my grandmother’s home that very day. On the way

I asked my father who had told him about my mistreatment.

“You are my daughter. When you are not happy I can feel it, even

if you are far away. One night when I dreamt about you, I saw you

crying. I had to come and check whether it was just a dream.”

Since I had only been away for six months, I was allowed to go into

Grade 6. In the same year, my father died. We went back to Samfya

with my mother. I was able to find a school place. I sat my Grade 7

examination and I passed well. I was selected to go into Grade 8.

However, I needed uniform, books and shoes. My mother could not

afford to provide them. My chances of getting a good education

were buried with my father. It is painful to drop out of school for

lack of support. Even the people in the village felt sorry for me. A

teacher from Chisokone Basic School came to my home. He told

me about an organisation that would help me. He said the school’s

committee had selected me as one of the pupils to be supported and

I was able to go back to school and start Grade 8.

Phoebe

You are my daughter. When you are not happy I can feel it, even if you are far away.


Chapter Three

Stories of Change


In the journey of my life, I’ve encountered many hurdles that have left me stronger. They were actually steps up the ladder. I have managed to be where I am now mainly because of my education. To me, education is a weapon against poverty.

Fiona Muchembere, former Camfed beneficiary and founding member of Cama - now Camfed Programme Manager for Governance and Advocacy

Come is the day when our voices can be heard from the top, producing an echo that awakens all those who are asleep.

Judith Kumire, Educationalist, activist and advocate, Zimbabwe


I was born in a remote part of Samfya District, in Luapula Province.

In my home area it is normal for girl children to drop out of school

even at lower primary level and get married.

Right from the start, I was a very bright pupil and always came first

in my class. Yet before I had finished primary school, my parents

were arranging for me to marry a stranger. This is common practice

in my home area and my parents didn’t think twice about it.

It was all I could do to persuade them to let me finish basic school

before the wedding took place. When the news of my impending

marriage reached my head teacher’s ears, he sent for me. He gave

me a long talk on the importance of education. I told him it was

not my wish to get married. I was doing so under pressure from my

family. He felt very sorry for me and we discussed ways in which he

could help me.

He came to talk to my parents and struggled with them to find a

solution that would allow me to stay in school and delay marriage.

At last they agreed to send me to my cousin in Mansa to continue

my education away from home. I had full support from my cousin

who took me in to his family, and even met part of my school

expenses. I graduated from Grade 12 and went on to train as a

teacher. I am now teaching at Mandubi Basic School. I am married to

a man of my choice, and we have two children. Whenever I am able

to, I visit my parents. I do my best to support them and some of their

relatives.

I write this story as a lesson to other girls to be strong and stick

to their principles. Although my parents felt education was for

boy children and not girl children, I persevered and completed my

education. They are now the first people to speak about the value of

educating all children.

Priscilla

He came to talk to my parents and struggled with them to find a solution that would allow me to stay in school and delay marriage.


I was born in Kalomo District. My parents were peasant farmers.

They were illiterate since they had not had the chance to go to

school. My mother, though not educated, looked forward to seeing

her first-born daughter go to school. When I was finally enrolled

in Grade 1, she got excited and sewed pieces of her old clothes to

make a dress that would make me presentable at school.

At school I worked very hard and excelled. The boys in my class

could not challenge my performance. In Grade 7, I obtained the

highest marks in my school. I was excited when I received my

acceptance letter to Grade 8 earlier than the rest. I was selected to

go to Lusanga Secondary School. It was not easy then to be selected

to attend a boarding school. It was at this time that my father began

to show an interest in my education. He boasted about me. He

would even say: “There is no one in this village who has a daughter

in secondary school.” The other villagers would warn him not to

boast because he was investing in the wind. This was so because

society regarded education as for boys rather than for girls.

At Lusanga School, life started changing for me. I met girls from

well-to-do families. They dressed well and had inspiring stories about

life. I regarded them as wonderful girls worth emulating. One story

they told me, which I still vividly remember, was that it was old

fashioned if a girl had no boyfriend. As a village girl, I wished to get

out of being out of fashion. I was still wearing long dresses and flat

shoes. I was teased and humiliated by their comments.

Seeing how much I wanted to be like them, the town girls organised

a boyfriend for me. I was coached into mischief. I became pregnant

and was expelled from school. My boyfriend took me to his brother’s

home in Kabwe. Having been brought up in a Christian family, I

found life in my boyfriend’s home uncomfortable. His brother was a

drunkard who would come home and fight with his family. This was

torture to me. I began to hate myself. I stopped blaming the town girls

and acknowledged that I had made a mistake. I regretted all I had

done and needed forgiveness. I went back to my parents. I realised

the kind of misery I had caused my mother who my father accused

of coaching me into mischief. I had destroyed my father’s image and

the pride he had in my achievements at school. He became a laughing

stock in the village and a target for ridicule. This I knew was not right.

I promised myself not to disappoint my parents ever again.

I set my mind to becoming a teacher and I studied for my O-levels.

Obtaining the O-level certificate gained me entry into Nkrumah

Teacher Training College and eventually to the University of Zambia.

I became a lecturer and was promoted to the position of senior

education officer. I am now a senior educationalist in Zambia,

specialising in training teachers. I have travelled the world and have

had many great experiences.

A lot of things happen to block our progress in education. If we are

determined we can overcome them. Education is the only way that

we can change our destiny.

Leah

The other villagers would warn him not to boast because he was investing in the wind.


My mother’s life was sad. She lost her first husband at an early

age, and remarried a man who was indifferent to her. One day we

received news of her sister’s death, and the sadness seemed to

overwhelm her. She passed away just a few months later.

My father then said that we were not his children. He abandoned us

and without our mother to protect us, I dropped out of school and

started to go with men to pay for food for myself and my brother.

During this time I met a man who promised to marry me. I thought

I would escape from the life I was leading, but his promises were

false. He abandoned me when he found out that I was pregnant and

I gave birth without any support from him. It was a very tough time

in my life.

I was a single mother, with unfinished schooling and no hope of

anything better coming along for me and my child. But a Cama

mentor came to Mikenge where I live. She explained that Cama is

a network to support women and I joined and was given a grant to

start a business. Now, when I look ahead to my future, the view is

very different from the darkness that I saw before.

Chanda

I was a single mother, with unfinished schooling and no hope of anything better coming along for me and my child.


I am the second born in a family of seven. I started my primary

education at Sioma Basic School and I was a brilliant pupil, so

primary education was not a problem for me.

After I wrote my Grade 7 examinations, as it was time to cultivate

the fields, I assisted my parents with the work whilst waiting for my

results. I continued to do well, and my parents encouraged me to

work extra hard. I had no disturbances despite my village being far

from the school. It was not surprising that the following year I was

the only non-repeater girl who made it to Grade 10, and everyone

was so proud of me.

I was identified to be a Camfed beneficiary and that took all the

worry about my education away from my parents. But also in that

year I was enticed by a certain boy.

He said he loved me and I started going out with him. The following

year, I got pregnant. I knew I had betrayed everyone who had believed

in me. I tried not to lose hope and I continued with my studies.

It is very challenging to be pregnant while schooling. You feel you

have let people down, and friends seem far away with no cares or

worries. It is a lonely thing, even when the child has been born.

I had a baby girl in the first month of Grade 12. Since that time I have

tried to follow two paths – education and motherhood – but it is

challenging to do two things at the same time. I wrote my final exams

and took my results, but I could not get a place at Malengwa Teacher

Training College as I hoped because my daughter was too young. I still

wish to improve my education. I have the confidence that I would not

throw away another chance to reach out for my dream.

Nakweti

I have the confidence that I would not throw away another chance to reach out for my dream.


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I was brought up in a happy Christian home. My father worked in

the City Council and my mother was a housewife who took very

good care of us. Despite being a loving mother, she did not tolerate

bad behaviour. I am proud to say I was one of my mother’s favourite

children. We had a good relationship because I was quiet and

performed everything to her expectation.

At the age of 15, I qualified to go to secondary school. During

this time I was going through traditional rites of passage into

womanhood. I now became a young woman. My father retired in

this same year and he went home to the village. I could not go with

them because the secondary school back home was too far. The

family decided to leave me with my aunt.

The way of living in my aunt’s home was different from the way

things were in my home. My aunt had five children. The oldest

was a girl two years older than me. We became close, but I did not

approve of many things she did. She was already going out with

boys, and she sometimes spent nights out. This was never done in

my own home. Not even my oldest sister had ever spent a night out.

When I was in Grade 9, she started inviting boys for me, but I always

turned them down. During this same year my mother came to visit

us. It was really good to be with her. It was during my mother’s visit

that I faced the biggest challenge in my life. One day, there was a

wedding at our neighbour’s house. Little did I know that my cousin

had organised for me to meet a man there. The man was seven

years older than me and I was not interested in him at all.

My cousin asked me to go with her. I did not know that her plan

was to leave me alone with this man. When the man grabbed me, I

screamed and screamed but no one heard me because of the noise

from the wedding house. When I started to scream, he had also

covered my mouth with his hands, so my screams were muffled. In

the end, the man raped me. The pain and the feeling that I had been

violated were too much for me. To make matters worse, when I got

home my mother would not listen to my explanation. She was so

disappointed that she beat me almost to death.

I felt that the world was turning its back on me. I could not handle

the situation so very early the following morning, I left home and

spent the whole day at my friend’s home. I told my friend not to tell

anyone that I was with her. When my mother came to her house

to find out whether I was there, she told her that I wasn’t. In the

evening she came back and found me. I was in pain physically,

spiritually and emotionally. I told myself that I would never forgive

her and the man who had raped me. In spite of her anger, my

mother bought me some painkillers. I took all ten of them at once in

an attempt to put an end to my life.

My education was affected. I lost interest in almost everything.

I failed my Grade 9 exams. I developed a very negative attitude

towards men. I told myself I would never get married or have a

boyfriend. I thank my brother who came and took me to his home

in Southern Province. My future began to look better as each new

day dawned. I repeated Grade 9. I concentrated on my studies and

eventually passed my exams.

Casey

I felt that the world was turning its back on me.


70

I was four months pregnant with my second child when my husband

left me, and he left me with nothing. He said he wanted a more

educated woman. I was not educated enough for him. My education

had ended after Grade 9 because my parents could not afford to

support me further. As the oldest of six children, I had to help my

family, and so, like many other girls, I dropped out of school to face

a future of work or marriage. It was an irony that my husband left

me because of my supposed ignorance and lack of education, so

that I became a burden to my family after all.

When I returned to my family, my life changed and everything

appeared to go wrong. My father died a year after my divorce. I

did not know what to do, or where to go. For seven days I refused

to eat anything. Yet I did not die. Finally, I recovered and made up

my mind to face the future with courage. I started working at a

company called CEFRA, which is owned by one of the community

members in the district. Life improved although I was still not able to

provide the basic needs at home.

In June 2005, Cama was launched in my area. Things changed

for me then when I was accepted as a member and started to be

involved in Cama’s activities in my community. I was elected as Vice-

Chairperson of the association, and in November 2005 I was chosen

as a regional coordinator at a national Cama meeting in Lusaka.

I am now responsible for the Cama Community Health Programme,

and have trained 100 women as Community Health Activists, who

in turn have reached 15,000 Zambians with vital information about

HIV/AIDS and other health issues. According to our tradition and

culture, it was taboo for a young woman to stand up in public and

talk about sex, reproductive health and such issues as HIV/AIDS in

the presence of elders – yet AIDS affects women more than men.

These are the same cultures and traditions that allowed my husband

to abandon his wife and child. Things are changing now. Cama has

helped me a lot. I have come to know so many things. I am able to

make decisions and advise my fellow members. I am able to support

my family. Through Cama, I am able to speak to people and raise

important issues that affect young people. I am now empowered

with information and can help young women facing similar

challenges to the ones I have gone through. Gone are the days when

young women were asleep.

Mwelwa

According to our tradition and culture, it was taboo for a young woman to stand up in public and talk about sex.


74

Mine is a candidacy

for every ordinary man and woman

who ever believed in the God given ability

for a human being to rise above the ordinary.

It is a candidacy

for every man born of a woman

who has revered that woman for having given him life.

Mine is a candidacy

for every man who ever fathered a daughter

who was a potential President.

Mine is indeed a candidacy

for every mother who ever spent countless hours

grooming her daughter for a fuller life.

It is a candidacy

for every brother whose sister’s leadership potential

drove him up the wall and generated sibling jealousy!

Mine is indeed a candidacy

for every sister who ever had to stamp her foot in rage

at her erstwhile brother, demanding recognition

for her leadership qualities!

Above all

Mine is a candidacy

for every girl whose dreams on countless occasions

transported her to a world of unlimited freedoms;

where she was unafraid to be who she wanted to be.

To crown it all

Mine is a candidacy

for that special woman with sufficient courage and arrogance,

coupled with the right amount of humility,

to stand her in good-stead, when she crosses her

political threshold as a liberated soul

capable of becoming whomsoever she was destined to be.

Female Leadership

by Ambassador Gwendoline Konie


76

The Campaign for Female Education (Camfed) is an international

non-profit organisation dedicated to fighting poverty and HIV/AIDS

in rural communities in Africa by educating girls and investing in their

economic independence and leadership once they complete school.

Studies in many countries have shown that educating girls makes a

significant contribution to development, as educated women keep

themselves healthier, protect themselves from HIV/AIDS and have

fewer and healthier children, more of whom attend school.

Camfed Zambia was established in 2001. Since then, the

programmes have grown rapidly and Camfed is active in rural

districts in the north and west of the country, with a head office

in Lusaka. The programmes have a positive effect on the wider

community as well as the individual. Educating girls and women

unlocks energies which drive social and economic development, and

helps to build foundations for the well-being of the next generation

of Zambians.

Cama is a growing network of young rural African women, most

of whom have been supported through school by Camfed. Many

Cama members receive business training and loans and through their

enterprise become business women, role models, health educators

and philanthropists, supporting themselves and others in their

communities.

Visit www.camfed.org to find out more

About the Publisher


Listen to my Story is a books of images, and accompanying stories by

children and young people from across Zambia. It is a teaching resource

that we hope pupils and teachers will enjoy.

All of us at Camfed very much appreciate the financial support of the

UK Department for International Development in the production of this

book and accompanying materials. Camfed would also like to thank the

Zambia Ministry of Education.

Be inspired by Leah, Mwangala and the other writers who tell their

stories in this book. Find your talent and reach for the stars.


Listen to my story

I believe education, hard

work, determination and self-confidence are the only way to success.

Growing Up in Zambia - Listen To My Story

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Transcript of Growing Up in Zambia - Listen To My Story