Finnish Defence Language Centre Aiming your words right: using plain language in the office Laura...

Finnish Defence Language Centre

Aiming your words right:using plain language in the office

Laura Murto-LindénLanguage Specialist

Finnish Defence Forces

BILC Conference 2013Tblisi, Georgia


Something needs to change

English language skills

Administrative procedures


Readability = an interplay between text and reader

Those features of the reader that make reading easy are:• Prior knowledge• Reading skill• Interest• Motivation

Those features of the text that make reading easy are:• Content• Style• Design• Organization


And what they’re actually saying is…


Example from US Army Regulations: the original version

Methods of Transmission or Transportation: 7-301. Secret Information.Administrative procedures shall be established by each DoD Component for controlling Secret information and material originated or received by an activity; distributed or routed to a sub-element of such activity; and disposed of by the activity by transfer of custody or destruction. The control system for Secret information must be determined by a practical balance of security and operating efficiency and must meet the following minimum requirements:

• It must provide a means to ensure that Secret material sent outside a major subordinate element (the activity) of the DoD Component concerned has been delivered to the intended recipient...

• It must provide a record of receipt and dispatch of Secret material by each major subordinate element. The dispatch record requirement may be satisfied when the distribution of Secret material is evident and addressees or distribution lists for classified documentation...

• Records of receipt and dispatch for Secret material shall be retained for a minimum of 2 years...


The “simplified” version

Transmission, Methods: 4-102. Secret.• You may send secret information by US Registered Postal Service

mail within and between the United States and its Territories. • You may use Federal Express and U.S. Post Service Express Mail for

transmitting secret mail within the United States and between the United States and its Territories under the following STRICT condition security:

– Mail should meet the weight and size limits of the carrier used. – You should follow the inner wrappings and receipt

requirements in this handbook. – You should ensure delivery by Friday so that the carrier is not

in possession of the package over the weekend.


The NATO job description


Readability Score Average age of reader

Approx. school grade

0.0 – 30Best understood by university graduates

Tertiary degree

60 - 70Easily understood by 13- to 15-year-old students

7th or 8th grade

90 – 100Easily understood by an average 11-year-old student

4th grade

Interpreting the readability score


This is how you make Microsoft Word display readability statistics

Tools → Options → Spelling & Grammar tab →

Show readability statistics (left-hand corner)

Word will display the readability statistics of your document after you have run it through spell check.


If your audience can…

• find what they need

• understand what they find

• use what they find

you have written in plain language.


First example, part 1


First example, part 2


A letter addressed to boys under 18 with dual FIN-US citizenship


Reading “ease”: best understood by university graduatesGrade level: university


A “simplified” version of the same letter


Reading ease: fairly difficultGrade level: some high school


In the classroomAsk your students to consider WHY they are writing.

Do they want to:- Inform- Impress- Intimidate- Convince- Conform- Sound like a native speaker- Show authority?


Plain language in the office: a question of attitude

Describing problems in NATO communication as “language proficiency shortfalls” is not helpful.

Successful communication is a two-way process.

Just what sort of language should our students be proficient in?

NATIONAL DEFENCE UNIVERSITYFINNISH DEFENCE LANGUAGE CENTRE

THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION!


ReferencesSmart Language, Readers, Readability, and the Grading of Text, William H. DuBay © 2007 (slide 5)

http://www.plainlanguage.gov/examples/before_after/govregarmy.cfm (slide 10-11)

http://www.nald.ca/library/research/readab/readab.pdf (slide 13)

http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/word-help/test-your-document-s-readability-HP010148506.aspx (slide 14)

http://www.plainlanguage.gov/whatisPL/index.cfm (slide 15)

Talouskasvua? Ensin pitää osata lukea. Annamari Sipilä ([email protected]), Helsingin Sanomat 29 NOV 2012

The cartoons on slides 4 and 12 have been reproduced free of charge.The one on slide 12 requires a small licence fee: www.CartoonStock.com. Please do not copy the cartoon.

Finnish Defence Language Centre Aiming your words right: using plain language in the office Laura...

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