Final Project

WEDDINGS

SWAYED BY THE SELL

Does today’s media effect a woman’s decision to say “I Do”?

INTRODUCTION

WHAT IS MARRIAGE?

A wedding ceremony is a celebration…

It‟s the ultimate declaration of the ultimate unification of two people.

It‟s the event that allows loved ones to witness that unification.

And it could even be argued that having a wedding ceremony makes it seem more official.

Weddings are as old as time. They have always had their traditions. The white dress, the ring that bound the woman to the man, the cake, the gifts… but throughout history symbols may have held the same meaning but seem to have changed in appearance, and arguably… expectation.

What once was considered a valuable gesture was a simple band of gold. A metal that was durable, precious, yet modest. Now what seems to lay on the finger of most American women is

a lavish display of sparkle.

Wearing a hand-me-down dress of the color of purity was considered extravagant enough decades ago, and now we have women who seem to be unsatisfied until they have found the

“perfect” dress for their personality.

One cannot deny the high standard our society has seemed to put on the traditions of matrimony. A wedding ceremony is a fundamental statement when marrying the partner of your

life. But they have become so extravagant and indulgent, that it seems to taken focus over the actual marriage itself.

WHY HAVE A CEREMONY?

MEDIA

An analysis of our society’s bridal advertising and entertainment

ADVERTISEMENTS

ENTERTAINMENT

PERSPECTIVE

Does one prove more love than the other?

PERSPECTIVE

PERSONAL ACCOUNTS

Question One: What made you decide to get married?

Question Two: Do you think the media may influence a woman’s decision to marry?

22 years old

Single

Never Married

JILLIAN


“Are you kidding?? I‟m terrified of marriage! The idea of being with one

person for the rest of my life…? I just want to focus on myself.”

Question Two: Do you think the media may influence a woman‟s decision to marry?

“Maybe?? Me personally, I LOVE wedding shows, and I admit to having

bought [Bridal] magazines… I love the hair and make-up, and the

dresses… but it doesn‟t make me want to get married. I‟ve got my

priorities straight! Although… if I could have the wedding without the

marriage that‟d be awesome!”

20 Years Old

Engaged

Dated Six Months

MELISSA


“I knew I was going to marry him right away. He has all the qualities I look for

in a husband… I‟m myself around him… and I just can‟t wait to start my life

with him.”


“No, not really… I mean, maybe for some people. But I just like to watch

wedding shows and stuff because it‟s entertaining. Plus they give some really

great ideas, haha!”

25 Years Old

Married

Newlywed

AMANDA


“We met in high school… none of my friends liked him… my

parents definitely didn‟t like him… but I don‟t know, we just had

such a great connection right off the bat. It was just so natural with

him. I wasn‟t worried about the future, I just wanted to be with him.”


“Um… I‟ve never thought of that before… but since you‟re bringing

it up I would say yeah, I think the media does influence women‟s

decision to marry. I wanted to have a nice dress and a nice ring but at

the end of the day I just wanted to make us permanent. So I guess it

depends on the woman and how she ultimately views marriage.”

30 Years Old

Married Seven Years

New Mom

EMILY


“Well, he was the first man I had ever loved… the best friend I had ever

had… plus I didn‟t have a very good living situation at home, and he was a

way out I guess? We lived together for awhile which I think lead to the ease

of making the decision to marry „cause it was no big deal and I already

knew he was the one I was going to be with.”


“Not really… I mean maybe it sets higher expectations…? But I think

women marry because they want to get married, and putting together a

beautiful ceremony is a plus.”

32 Years Old

Divorced

Married for Twelve Years

THERESA


“My religion had a major influence on my decision to marry. We were

encouraged to marry young. I was in love with him and that was enough

for me but in retrospect we should have waited.”


“Yes, but not all women. I think it depends on their personality, and their

self-esteem. Like, if a Bridal Magazine at the checkout makes you want to

have a husband then maybe it‟s time to search within yourself a little bit.”

46 Years Old

Married Twenty-Nine Years

Still in Love

ANGELA


“He said, „I want to take care of you.‟ I had never had anyone say anything

like that to me before… and the combination of our deep friendship, plus

that phrase, to me, was what made me say „yes‟… in that moment

everything stood still... I thought, This is gonna be fun…!”


“I do, I think it influences women both ways though… obviously the media

is very influential and I think that for young women, especially looking for

independence… getting married is that next grown up step.”

PERSPECTIVE

UNINTENDED

CONSEQUENCES

Possible influences the media has caused

Changed perceptions

Delayed or avoided marriages

Negative stigma

Fear of failure

Divorce Rates are at an all time high

Women today are delaying if not avoiding marriage altogether.

SOCIAL CHANGE

Divorce

“ T h e d ivo r c e r a t e i n A m e r i c a f o r f i r s t m a r r i a g e , v e r s u s s e c o n d o r t h i r d m a r r i a g e i s 5 0 % p e r c e n t o f f i r s t m a r r i a g e s , 6 7 % o f s e c o n d a n d 7 4 % o f t h i r d m a r r i a g e s e n d i n d i vo r c e , a c c o r d i n g t o Je n n i f e r B a ke r o f t h e Fo r e s t I n s t i t u t e o f P r o f e s s i o n a l P s y ch o l o g y i n S p r i n g f i e l d , M i s s o u r i .”

Delayed Mar r ia ge

Accord ing to the U.S. Census

Bureau , f i f t y y ea r s a g o i n 1961 the

ave rag e ag e fo r men and women to

mar r y was 22 and 20 . In 2011 , i t

wa s 28 and 26 .

STATISTICS

Getting married too soon or too young and as a result failing in the marriage.

Inflated hopes and ideals

Resulting in disappointment

UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS

SOLUTIONS

Ways our society can prevent weddings being swayed by the sell

Our academics go beyond the teachings of math and science…

Is it not also to prepare our children,

our future society,

for the realities of life?

Creating courses in our high schools that educate our young students of life how to manage relationships and social interaction will better equip them

when they have matured into the adult world. Courses that which inform an adolescent healthy ways to cope with relationship conflict, to utilize certain

mental tools when interacting with others, and to understand the many differences of members of the opposite sex. Practicing this may not only

create healthier relationships in the future, but also mold a more an individual into a more well-rounded contributor of society.

EDUCATE

We can’t change the media, but we can change how we inform.

The causes for divorce are perpetually dissected and analyzed…

How might it be prevented?

Can it be prevented?

This is uncertain, though scholars seem to be hard at work with finding the answers. Perhaps, what is certain, is that we can at least try to

counteract the failure of marriages in our country. And it could be with something as simple as guidance.

Creating a health system where free, frequent, and encouraged counseling to married couples, as well as prospective ones, is provided has the potential to not only revocate the dissolving of marriages, but

the changed perceptions of marriage counseling in general.

COUNSEL

We can’t change the media, but we can change how we help.

RESEARCH

Bibliography and Work-Cited

Clark, Jerusha. When I Get Married--: Surrendering the Fantasy, Embracing the Reality . Colorado Springs, CO: NavPress, 2009. Print.

Davis, Lisa Selin. "All but the Ring: Why Some Couples Don't Wed." Time. Time, 25 May 2009. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1898346,00.html>.

Flanagan Ph. D., Kelly. "Marriage Is for Losers." UnTangled. 2 Mar. 2012. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://drkellyflanagan.com/2012/03/02/marriage-is-for-losers/>.

Goudreau, Jenna. "Why Men and Women Get Married." Forbes. Forbes Magazine, 27 May 2010. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.forbes.com/2010/05/26/why-do-men-women-get-married-forbes-woman-well-being-love-money.html>.

I, A. N. "Relationships." Why Women in Their 20s Rush into Marriage . Hindustan Times, 11 Sept. 2011. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.hindustantimes.com/Lifestyle/Relationships/Why-women-in-their-20s-rush-into-marriage/Article1-766849.aspx>.

Moss, Aron. "Why Get Married?" - Readings. ChaBad.org Lifecycle Events, 27 Feb. 2006. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/361650/jewish/Why-Get-Married.htm>.

Rodolfo, Mendoza-Denton. "The Fantasy of Perfect Love." Perfect for Me. Psychology Today, 14 Mar. 2012. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.psychologytoday.com/collections/201203/the-fantasy-perfect-love/perfect-me>.

Simon Ph.D., Caroline J. "The Fantasy of Perfect Love." Illusive Lovers' Dreams. Psychology Today, 14 Mar. 2012. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.psychologytoday.com/collections/201203/the-fantasy-perfect-love/illusive-lovers-dreams>.

Stosny, Steven. "The Fantasy of Perfect Love." Love Big, Think Small. Psychology Today, 2 Mar. 2009. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.psychologytoday.com/collections/201203/the-fantasy-perfect-love/love-big-think-small>.

White Ph. D., Mark D. "Maybe It's Just Me, But..." Why Get Married? The Value of Commitment . Psychology Today, 3 Aug. 2010. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/maybe-its-just-me/201008/why-get-married-the-value-commitment>.

Wright, H. Norman, and Wes Roberts. Before You Say "I Do": A Marriage Preparation Manual For Couples . Eugene: Harvest House, 1997. Print.

"The English Bride: Why Marry? The Purposes of Marriage." University of Michigan. Web. 21 Mar. 2012. <http://www.umich.edu/~ece/student_projects/wedding_bride/purposes.html>.

BIBLIOGRAPHY

WORK-CITED

Final Project

Education

Transcript of Final Project