Chapter 12Chapter 12Getting Along With OthersGetting Along With Others

PreparePrepare

• Relationships are formed more Relationships are formed more easily with others who are similar to easily with others who are similar to usus

• Easier to interact with others who Easier to interact with others who look as we do and share our race, look as we do and share our race, ethnicity, and cultureethnicity, and culture

• Learning to accept diversity in your Learning to accept diversity in your life is a crucial skilllife is a crucial skill

OrganizeOrganize

• ArabArab• GayGay• African-AmericanAfrican-American• HispanicHispanic• FemaleFemale• DisabledDisabled• OverweightOverweight

What comes to your mind when you think about

these labels?

PrejudicePrejudice

• Evaluations or judgments of Evaluations or judgments of members of a group, rather than members of a group, rather than individual characteristicsindividual characteristics

• Maintained by stereotypes, Maintained by stereotypes, i.e.beliefs or expectations about i.e.beliefs or expectations about members of a groupmembers of a group

Consider Consider

• Do men drive better than women?Do men drive better than women?• Are people on welfare lazy?Are people on welfare lazy?• Do homeless people want a job?Do homeless people want a job?• Can white men jump?Can white men jump?• Do overweight individuals lack will Do overweight individuals lack will

power?power?• What stereotypes do you believe?What stereotypes do you believe?

To develop cultural To develop cultural competence it is competence it is

important to identify important to identify our prejudices and our prejudices and

stereotypes and to fight stereotypes and to fight them.them.

Find Your Find Your Stereotype Quotient Stereotype Quotient

Check your stereotype quotient by Check your stereotype quotient by completing completing Try It #2Try It #2. Share your . Share your answers in small groups.answers in small groups.

WorkWork

• Study other cultures and customsStudy other cultures and customs• TravelTravel• Participate in community serviceParticipate in community service• Don’t ignore people’s backgroundsDon’t ignore people’s backgrounds• Don’t make assumptions about who Don’t make assumptions about who

people are differentpeople are different• Accept differencesAccept differences

Dealing with Dealing with Classroom DiversityClassroom Diversity

• Present opinions respectfullyPresent opinions respectfully• Don’t assume you can understand other Don’t assume you can understand other

people’s experiencespeople’s experiences• Don’t expect people to be representatives Don’t expect people to be representatives

of the group from which they belong-they of the group from which they belong-they can only speak for themselvescan only speak for themselves

• Meet students who are different from youMeet students who are different from you• All opinions are important, even if views All opinions are important, even if views

are in the minority. Speak Up!are in the minority. Speak Up!

Evaluate-Ask YourselfEvaluate-Ask Yourself

• Do I make judgments about others Do I make judgments about others based on external features?based on external features?

• Do my friends represent diversity?Do my friends represent diversity?• Do I recognize that all people have Do I recognize that all people have

the same basic needs?the same basic needs?• Do I seek to understand the Do I seek to understand the

perspectives of others?perspectives of others?

RethinkRethink

• Relationships with others help us Relationships with others help us determine who we aredetermine who we are

• Attitudes and beliefs are shaped by Attitudes and beliefs are shaped by othersothers

• Make friends by investing time in Make friends by investing time in othersothers

• Reveal yourself-be honestReveal yourself-be honest• Show concern and caringShow concern and caring• Friendship is a two-way streetFriendship is a two-way street

True RelationshipsTrue Relationships

• Built on foundation of trustBuilt on foundation of trust• Commitment to honestyCommitment to honesty• Mutual supportMutual support• LoyaltyLoyalty• AcceptanceAcceptance• Willingness to welcome changeWillingness to welcome change

Communication in Communication in RelationshipsRelationships

• Be a good listenerBe a good listener– Stop talkingStop talking– Use eye contact and pay attentionUse eye contact and pay attention– Reflective feedback-rephrase what Reflective feedback-rephrase what

speaker has saidspeaker has said– Ask questionsAsk questions– Admit when you are distractedAdmit when you are distracted

LonelinessLoneliness

• Can occur in a crowdCan occur in a crowd• Become involved in campus activitiesBecome involved in campus activities• Find a study partnerFind a study partner• You are not the only one who is lonelyYou are not the only one who is lonely• SocializeSocialize• Get a jobGet a job• Loneliness is a temporary stateLoneliness is a temporary state• Take a break from people when neededTake a break from people when needed

Conflicts in Conflicts in RelationshipsRelationships

• Avoid using the word “you”Avoid using the word “you”– You don’t understandYou don’t understand– You are being stubbornYou are being stubborn– How can you say thatHow can you say that

• Use “I” statementsUse “I” statements– I think we are misunderstanding each otherI think we are misunderstanding each other– I feel that you are not listeningI feel that you are not listening– I worry when you do not call when you are I worry when you do not call when you are

going to be lategoing to be late

Conflict ResolutionConflict Resolution

• Stop, look, and listenStop, look, and listen• Defuse the argumentDefuse the argument• Get personalGet personal• Listen to real messageListen to real message• Show that you are listeningShow that you are listening• Acknowledge angerAcknowledge anger• Ask for clarificationAsk for clarification• Make requests explicitMake requests explicit

Life is not a zero-sum Life is not a zero-sum game -- someone does game -- someone does

not have to lose.not have to lose.

Surviving EndingsSurviving Endings

• Not all relationships last a lifetimeNot all relationships last a lifetime• Time eases painTime eases pain• Be active-keep busyBe active-keep busy• Accept that endings are painfulAccept that endings are painful• Talk to a friendTalk to a friend• Write down your feelingsWrite down your feelings• Speak to a professionalSpeak to a professional

P.O.W.E.R. PlanP.O.W.E.R. Plan

PREPARE

ORGANIZE

WORK

EVALUATE

RETHINK

Accept diversity as a valuedpart of your life

Explore your ownprejudices and stereotypes

Develop culturalcompetence

Check your progress inattaining cultural competence

Understand how your own racial, ethnic, and cultural background affects others

Career ConnectionsCareer Connections

Cultural competence will help you respond to legal issues in the

workplace, improve relationships with others, and increase performance on

work teams.

How Social Diversity and How Social Diversity and Relationships Affect the Relationships Affect the

College ExperienceCollege Experience• Racial and ethic characteristics Racial and ethic characteristics

comprise diversitycomprise diversity• Gender, sexual orientation, age, Gender, sexual orientation, age,

mental and physical characteristics mental and physical characteristics also comprise diversityalso comprise diversity

• Education, religion, income levelEducation, religion, income level

Diversity WheelDiversity Wheel

Race, Ethnicity, and Race, Ethnicity, and CultureCulture

• Race refers to physical differences Race refers to physical differences that set one group apart from that set one group apart from anotheranother

• Ethnicity refers to shared national Ethnicity refers to shared national origins or cultureorigins or culture

• Culture refers to learned behaviors, Culture refers to learned behaviors, beliefs, and attitudes of a groupbeliefs, and attitudes of a group

By mid-21By mid-21stst century, the century, the percentage of people in percentage of people in

the United States of the United States of African, Latin American, African, Latin American,

Asian, and Arabic ancestry Asian, and Arabic ancestry will be greater than the will be greater than the percentage of those of percentage of those of

Western European Western European ancestry.ancestry.

College enrollments College enrollments will mirror the shift in will mirror the shift in

the diverse the diverse population.population.

Cultural CompetenceCultural Competence

• Knowledge of others’ customs, Knowledge of others’ customs, perspectives, background, and perspectives, background, and historyhistory

• Provides basis for civic engagementProvides basis for civic engagement• Permits us to act with civility toward Permits us to act with civility toward

othersothers

P.O.W.E.R. PlanP.O.W.E.R. Plan

• PPreparerepare: : Accept diversity as a valued part Accept diversity as a valued part of your lifeof your life

• OOrganizerganize: : Explore your own prejudices Explore your own prejudices and stereotypesand stereotypes

• WWorkork: : Develop cultural competenceDevelop cultural competence• EEvaluatevaluate: : Check your progress in Check your progress in

attaining cultural competenceattaining cultural competence• RRethinkethink: : Understand how your own racial, Understand how your own racial,

ethic, and cultural background affects ethic, and cultural background affects othersothers

Journal TopicsJournal Topics

Thinking about Race, Ethnicity, and CultureThinking about Race, Ethnicity, and Culture• Were race and ethnicity discussed in your Were race and ethnicity discussed in your

family as you were growing up? In what family as you were growing up? In what ways?ways?

• Are you proud of your ethnicity? Why?Are you proud of your ethnicity? Why?• Think what it would be like to be a Think what it would be like to be a

member of a racial group or ethnicity member of a racial group or ethnicity other than your own. In what ways would other than your own. In what ways would your childhood and adolescence have your childhood and adolescence have been different? How would you view the been different? How would you view the world differently?world differently?