C4 KEEPSAKES/FAMILYnyx.uky.edu/dips/xt78kp7tnv33/data/70102_C4Sun1104.pdf · Here’s a short list...
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C4 SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 4, 2012 KEEPSAKES/FAMILY THE ADVOCATE-MESSENGER | WWW.AMNEWS.COM BIRTHS WEDDINGS COLLEGE NEWS Angolia-Hunter Laura Marie Angolia and Erich Wallace Hunter were married June 9 at Bel- larmine Chapel in Cincin- nati. Megan Pierce of Milwau- kee, Wis., served as matron of honor. Bridesmaids were Rachel Bohlen of Washing- ton, D.C., Jessica Epstein of Abu Dhabu, UAE, Divyajyot Lekhi of Cincinnati, Melissa Angolia of Danville and Rachel Angolia of Little Rock, Ark. Best man was Michael Smith of Lexington. Groomsmen were Kinley Hunter of Newport, Daniel Kerrer of Rich- mond, Brian Angolia of Danville and Joseph Angolia of Lit- tle Rock, Ark. e bride is the daughter of Michael and Alexis Angolia of Danville. She is a certified public accountant with Barnes Dennig. e groom is the son of William Hunter and Karen Hunter, both of Newport. He is an electrician at Gilkey Elec- tric. After a wedding trip to St. Lucia, the couple live in Cold Spring, Ky. Erich and Laura Hunter Ian Gillespie Savannah and Patrick Gillespie of Danville an- nounce the birth of a son, Ian, 12:13 p.m. Oct. 14 at Fort Logan Hospital. e baby weighed 6 pounds, 9 ounces, and measured 19.25 inches. Maternal grandparents are John and Karen Caddell of Danville. Paternal grand- parents are David and Patri- cia Gillespie of Harrodsburg. DEAN’S LIST National College First summer term: Candice Porter of Bethelridge; Emily Major of Campbellsville; Melissa Noe and Bonnie Owens, both of Crab Orchard; Brandon Anderson, Forney Bierly, Lisa Elliott, Chasity Grubbs, Clarissa Hill, Jonathan Leftwich, Kobie Teas and Brandi Valeu, all of Danville; Doris Patten of Dunnville; Julia Edwards, Elizabeth Floyd and Nikki Sil- vers, all of Harrodsburg; Cathy Richards of Hustonville; Rebekah Greene and Amy Waterfill, both of Junction City; Tiffany Dominguez and Brenda Stipe, both of Lancaster; Ariana Hanlon, Georgina McDonald and Mar- ilyn Tate, all of Lebanon; Alicia Reese of Liberty; Jessie Mullins of Paint Lick; Katie Bell, Kalyn Gamble, Stefanie Padgett, Jennifer Pendergraft, Nancy Van Hook, all of Stanford; and Sonya Baker, Traci Jones and Misti Murphy, all of Waynesburg; Second summer term: Eva Cocanougher of Harrodsburg; and Demetree Masterson and William Pennington, both of Stanford. Third summer term: Joshua Parsons of Stanford. Julia Frances LeMonds Kenneth Christopher LeMonds and Jackie Begley LeMonds of Danville announce the birth of a daughter, Julia Frances, 8:17 a.m. Sept. 25 at Ephraim McDowell Re- gional Medical Center. e baby weighed 8 pounds, 3 ounces and measured 21 1 ⁄2 inches. Maternal grandparents are John and Mary Begley of Danville. Paternal grandparents are Kenneth and Sharon LeMonds of Danville. Great-grandparents are Maurice and Isabelle Begley of Springfield and Evelene Phelps Douglas of Danville. She joins sisters Katherine, 5, and Caroline, 2. As a parent, the positive encouragement you give to your child will go a long way toward helping him to de- velop a high self-esteem. at, in turn, is important for helping him to become a successful and happy indi- vidual. A child with a high self- esteem will act independ- ently, assume responsibility, take pride in his accom- plishments, tolerate frustra- tion, attempt new tasks and challenges, handle positive and negative emotions and offer assistance to others. On the other hand, a child who has low self-esteem will avoid trying new things, feel unloved and unwanted, blame others for his short- comings, feel emotionally indifferent, be unable to tol- erate a normal level of frus- tration, put down his talents and abilities and be easily influenced. To help develop your child’s self-esteem, look for ways to offer positive en- couragement to him. Tell him he does a great job of keeping his toys picked up and his room neat. If he plays sports, praise him for how he works well with his team mates and the points that he scores. You can also praise your child for the kindness he shows to others and how he sticks with com- pleting a task even when it may be difficult. It’s also important that you train your child not to think of himself or his ac- tions in a negative manner, as what we think of our- selves determines how we feel, which in turn deter- mines how we behave. You can do this by encouraging your child to constantly tell himself he can do anything that is placed before him. On those occasions when you may have to be critical of your child and his ac- tions, remember to use “I” statements rather than “you” statements. is will help to deflect the criticism away from your child as a person and instead keep it focused on your expecta- tions rather than your child’s actions. Susan Matherly is director at A Children’s Place, a service of Ephraim McDowell Health. Helping your child develop self-esteem CHILDREN’S CHATTER Susan Matherly Contributing Columnist K I W I ATOP PARD P I SCES I RAN LEDA I SAW APOL LO LATHE LADY LATHE ROS I ER EENY J PEG ME L T ONCE SPRAT SOAVES BOYCOT T S CAPTA I NBL I THE OB I T ADA I MAS ODS UTHANT BURGLAR WA I TANDSEE THE SAKE DESERT M I A MOLE MAE CRUE L CABLEMEN MAG T I THEBREAKERS SRS SKE LE TAL AANDE ATA N I NO POT TAURUS PROF BREATHECHEESE P I TBUL L CAS TRO KAZ BOZO MOA HONG WR I THENEWYORK SAF EWORD AREOLE NERDY ONEB ROUE I SNT F I LM AT T LEE SCYTHEOFRE L I E F P I CONE THA I YULE E LMO SCHWAS SOWS S TUD DL I X NYT CROSSWORD ANSWERS Do you ever wonder why other people act the way they do? I had an experience with a friend recently that re- vealed just how much of our backstory we bring into our interactions, and how little we know about the back- story of others. We were hosting a sur- prise party for a friend who had just turned 50. At the end of the evening I was sitting on the couch with one of the other hosts, a good friend who had brought her middle school- aged daughter to the party. e daughter, who is usually somewhat shy, asked me if I’d like to buy some maga- zines to support her band. Before I could answer, the mother jumped in saying, “Don’t ask Ms. McLeod that.” She was clearly em- barrassed that her daughter would give me a sales pitch at a party. I had an opposite reac- tion. My response was, “You should totally ask me that. I would LOVE to buy some magazines.” Before you cast judgment on either of our responses, here’s how the rest of the conversation played out. Because the mother is a good friend who, like me, is interested in understanding why people act the way they do, we dissected our differ- ent reactions. e mother said that the moment her daughter asked me to buy magazines she went into autopilot, hearing her own mother’s voice say, “Don’t be a bother.” She was raised with the mantra: Don’t ask people for things. Don’t interrupt adults. Don’t make people feel un- comfortable. at’s her backstory. My backstory is different. I also went into autopilot, but after decades of training salespeople, my immediate response to the daughter was, “You go girl!” I’m a teacher at heart. When a kid approaches me trying to sell something, the narrative going on in my head is: Be proactive. Make a difference. Try your best. I want to reinforce to that kid: You have the power and ability to ask for what you want. Two different backsto- ries; neither is wrong. But they demonstrate how even in the most seemingly sim- ple, low-stakes situations, we all bring the backstory from our past into our cur- rent interactions. Which leads me to why I want to invent a time ma- chine for empathy. What if you had a machine that en- abled you to go back in time and experience someone else’s past? What if you could go back and experience your spouse’s childhood exactly the way they experienced it? Would you better under- stand their quirks and be- liefs? Would you have more empathy for their fears and insecurities? What if you could experi- ence the past 10 years of work the way your boss had? Would you understand why he or she gets frustrated and angry about certain things? Would it make you want to be more supportive and helpful? What if you could experi- ence your parents’ child- hood? Would you better understand why they acted the way they did? Would you be more grateful and forgiving? For most of us, the an- swer to all of the above questions is yes. When you understand someone’s backstory, their behaviors and actions make more sense. Business strategist Lisa Earle McLeod specializes in sales force and leadership development. Why I want to invent a time machine for empathy TRIANGLE OF TRUTH Lisa Earle McLeod Syndicated Columnist I estimate that one-fourth of the questions parents ask me involve issues or behav- iors that merit little if any concern. Some of the “prob- lems” in question are normal to certain stages of develop- ment. Others are nothing more than little glitches that will resolve themselves in time (and might develop into real problems if people re- spond to them as such). And some are reflections of per- sonality (or temperament), which is inborn and therefore fairly fixed, although not im- mutable. ese include things like shyness, which most shy people figure out how to successfully compen- sate for by early adulthood. Here’s a short list of things parents needn’t worry them- selves about: n Preschool children who have imaginary friends, even if the child in question seems to believe the friend is real. ese inventions, which typ- ically appear during the third or fourth years of life, are nothing more than the prod- uct of a young child’s rapidly developing imagination. I al- most always recommend that parents play along with these additions to the family. After all, the child with an imaginary friend is going to occupy himself better and ask for a lot less parental at- tention than would other- wise be the case. at’s a win-win! n Tantrums during early to middle toddlerhood, even when the child seems to be completely out of control (“He acts crazy!”). At this age, tantrums are an expression of a child’s reluctance to accept that he isn’t the Grand Poobah. Granted, parents should definitely not give in to them, and it might be a good idea to assign (or take) the child to his room until the storm passes, but in and of themselves, tantrums at this age are nothing to get in a tizzy about. n umbsucking. Early on, some kids figure out how to self-calm by sucking their thumbs; some don’t. I’ve never figured out a reliable way of getting a thumb-suck- ing child to stop, but I have found that when parents try to force a child to stop, the usual result is an increase in thumbsucking. As for dental problems, nearly all kids are going to have to have braces, whether they suck their thumbs or not. n Night terrors. ese are to be distinguished from nightmares, which cause children to wake up. Night terrors occur when a child seems to get stuck in a hallu- cinatory state between sleep- ing and waking. ey are not reflective of psychological problems, but they can be quite anxiety-arousing for parents. When one occurs, don’t wake the child abruptly. Just prevent him from hurting himself, hold him (unless he refuses to be held), talk soothingly, and wait for it to pass. n e child is obviously no more than run-of-the-mill in the IQ department. So? Have you ever been to a high school reunion? If so, you surely noticed that a good number of folks who were not especially good students have managed to hold de- cent jobs, pay their bills, stay married to one person, raise well-behaved children, and develop interesting hobbies. Many kid behaviors don’t merit concern Caudill For City Commissioner Dear Friend and Fellow Danvillian, We are the proud family of Kevin Caudill, candidate for Danville City Commissioner. To us, he is son, brother, nephew, uncle, cousin. To his three daughters, he is Dad. To his church, he is a Member and an Elder. To his Bate Football Team, he is Coach. To many of you, he is Friend. To the voters, he is a Commissioner. To everyone in this wonderful town, he is the person that has represented you on the Commission since 2002, when he filled the unexpired term of his late Mother, Nancy Caudill. He has listened to your concerns and carefully considered every issue weighing the pros and cons – then voted with a deep appreciation for the people he represents. We know him to be thoughtful, thorough, and dedicated to doing the very best job he can to keep this “the nicest little town in America!” We ask for your vote and support on November 6th. There are seven candidates, you may vote for four. Please make Kevin one of your votes – his name appears as #6 on the ballot. Thank you, Emily, Jessi and Grace Patrick and Jennings McClure Bruce and Rob Caudill Bill and Pat Caudill Dwight and Carol Moberly Joey and Laurie Kirk Claire Caudill Cox Will and Katie Kirk Greg and Melissa Caudill George and Patsy McClure Paid for by Kevin Caudill John Rosemond Syndicated Columnist www.rosemond.com
Transcript of C4 KEEPSAKES/FAMILYnyx.uky.edu/dips/xt78kp7tnv33/data/70102_C4Sun1104.pdf · Here’s a short list...
C4 SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 4, 2012
KEEPSAKES/FAMILYTHE ADVOCATE-MESSENGER | WWW.AMNEWS.COM
BIRTHS
WEDDINGS
COLLEGE NEWS
Angolia-Hunter
Laura Marie Angolia andErich Wallace Hunter weremarried June 9 at Bel-larmine Chapel in Cincin-nati.
Megan Pierce of Milwau-kee, Wis., served as matronof honor. Bridesmaids wereRachel Bohlen of Washing-ton, D.C., Jessica Epstein ofAbu Dhabu, UAE, DivyajyotLekhi of Cincinnati, MelissaAngolia of Danville andRachel Angolia of LittleRock, Ark.
Best man was Michael Smith of Lexington. Groomsmenwere Kinley Hunter of Newport, Daniel Kerrer of Rich-mond, Brian Angolia of Danville and Joseph Angolia of Lit-tle Rock, Ark.
e bride is the daughter of Michael and Alexis Angoliaof Danville. She is a certified public accountant with BarnesDennig.
e groom is the son of William Hunter and KarenHunter, both of Newport. He is an electrician at Gilkey Elec-tric.
After a wedding trip to St. Lucia, the couple live in ColdSpring, Ky.
Erich and Laura Hunter
Ian GillespieSavannah and Patrick
Gillespie of Danville an-nounce the birth of a son,Ian, 12:13 p.m. Oct. 14 atFort Logan Hospital.
e baby weighed 6pounds, 9 ounces, andmeasured 19.25 inches.
Maternal grandparentsare John and Karen Caddellof Danville. Paternal grand-parents are David and Patri-cia Gillespie of Harrodsburg.
DEAN’S LIST
National College First summer term: Candice Porter of Bethelridge; Emily Major of
Campbellsville; Melissa Noe and Bonnie Owens, both of Crab Orchard;Brandon Anderson, Forney Bierly, Lisa Elliott, Chasity Grubbs, ClarissaHill, Jonathan Leftwich, Kobie Teas and Brandi Valeu, all of Danville;Doris Patten of Dunnville; Julia Edwards, Elizabeth Floyd and Nikki Sil-vers, all of Harrodsburg; Cathy Richards of Hustonville; Rebekah Greeneand Amy Waterfill, both of Junction City; Tiffany Dominguez and BrendaStipe, both of Lancaster; Ariana Hanlon, Georgina McDonald and Mar-ilyn Tate, all of Lebanon; Alicia Reese of Liberty; Jessie Mullins of PaintLick; Katie Bell, Kalyn Gamble, Stefanie Padgett, Jennifer Pendergraft,Nancy Van Hook, all of Stanford; and Sonya Baker, Traci Jones and MistiMurphy, all of Waynesburg;
Second summer term: Eva Cocanougher of Harrodsburg; andDemetree Masterson and William Pennington, both of Stanford.
Third summer term: Joshua Parsons of Stanford.
Julia Frances LeMondsKenneth Christopher LeMonds and Jackie Begley
LeMonds of Danville announce the birth of a daughter,Julia Frances, 8:17 a.m. Sept. 25 at Ephraim McDowell Re-gional Medical Center. e baby weighed 8 pounds, 3ounces and measured 211⁄2 inches.
Maternal grandparents are John and Mary Begley ofDanville. Paternal grandparents are Kenneth and SharonLeMonds of Danville. Great-grandparents are Maurice andIsabelle Begley of Springfield and Evelene Phelps Douglasof Danville.
She joins sisters Katherine, 5, and Caroline, 2.
As a parent, the positiveencouragement you give toyour child will go a long waytoward helping him to de-velop a high self-esteem.at, in turn, is importantfor helping him to become asuccessful and happy indi-vidual.
A child with a high self-esteem will act independ-ently, assume responsibility,take pride in his accom-plishments, tolerate frustra-tion, attempt new tasks andchallenges, handle positiveand negative emotions andoffer assistance to others.On the other hand, a childwho has low self-esteem will
avoid trying new things, feelunloved and unwanted,blame others for his short-comings, feel emotionallyindifferent, be unable to tol-erate a normal level of frus-tration, put down his talentsand abilities and be easilyinfluenced.
To help develop yourchild’s self-esteem, look forways to offer positive en-couragement to him. Tell
him he does a great job ofkeeping his toys picked upand his room neat. If heplays sports, praise him forhow he works well with histeam mates and the pointsthat he scores. You can alsopraise your child for thekindness he shows to othersand how he sticks with com-pleting a task even when itmay be difficult.
It’s also important thatyou train your child not tothink of himself or his ac-tions in a negative manner,as what we think of our-selves determines how wefeel, which in turn deter-mines how we behave. You
can do this by encouragingyour child to constantly tellhimself he can do anythingthat is placed before him.
On those occasions whenyou may have to be criticalof your child and his ac-tions, remember to use “I”statements rather than“you” statements. is willhelp to deflect the criticismaway from your child as aperson and instead keep itfocused on your expecta-tions rather than yourchild’s actions.
Susan Matherly is director atA Children’s Place, a service ofEphraim McDowell Health.
Helping your child develop self-esteemCHILDREN’S CHATTER
Susan MatherlyContributing Columnist
K I W I A T O P P A R D P I S C E SI R A N L E D A I S A W A P O L L OL A T H E L A D Y L A T H E R O S I E R
E E N Y J P E G M E L T O N C ES P R A T S O A V E S B O Y C O T T SC A P T A I N B L I T H E O B I TA D A I M A S O D S U T H A N TB U R G L A R W A I T A N D S E E T H ES A K E D E S E R T M I A M O L E
M A E C R U E L C A B L E M E NM A G T I T H E B R E A K E R S S R SS K E L E T A L A A N D E A T AN I N O P O T T A U R U S P R O FB R E A T H E C H E E S E P I T B U L LC A S T R O K A Z B O Z O M O A
H O N G W R I T H E N E W Y O R KS A F E W O R D A R E O L E N E R D YO N E B R O U E I S N T F I L MA T T L E E S C Y T H E O F R E L I E FP I C O N E T H A I Y U L E E L M OS C H W A S S O W S S T U D D L I X
NYT CROSSWORD ANSWERS
Do you ever wonder whyother people act the waythey do?
I had an experience witha friend recently that re-vealed just how much of ourbackstory we bring into ourinteractions, and how littlewe know about the back-story of others.
We were hosting a sur-prise party for a friend whohad just turned 50.
At the end of the eveningI was sitting on the couchwith one of the other hosts,a good friend who hadbrought her middle school-aged daughter to the party.e daughter, who is usuallysomewhat shy, asked me ifI’d like to buy some maga-zines to support her band.
Before I could answer, themother jumped in saying,“Don’t ask Ms. McLeodthat.” She was clearly em-barrassed that her daughterwould give me a sales pitchat a party.
I had an opposite reac-tion. My response was, “Youshould totally ask me that. I
would LOVE to buy somemagazines.”
Before you cast judgmenton either of our responses,here’s how the rest of theconversation played out.
Because the mother is agood friend who, like me, isinterested in understandingwhy people act the way theydo, we dissected our differ-ent reactions.
e mother said that themoment her daughter askedme to buy magazines shewent into autopilot, hearingher own mother’s voice say,“Don’t be a bother.” She wasraised with the mantra:Don’t ask people for things.Don’t interrupt adults.Don’t make people feel un-comfortable.
at’s her backstory. My backstory is different.
I also went into autopilot,
but after decades of trainingsalespeople, my immediateresponse to the daughterwas, “You go girl!”
I’m a teacher at heart.When a kid approaches metrying to sell something, thenarrative going on in myhead is: Be proactive. Makea difference. Try your best. Iwant to reinforce to that kid:You have the power andability to ask for what youwant.
Two different backsto-ries; neither is wrong. Butthey demonstrate how evenin the most seemingly sim-ple, low-stakes situations,we all bring the backstoryfrom our past into our cur-rent interactions.
Which leads me to why Iwant to invent a time ma-chine for empathy. What ifyou had a machine that en-abled you to go back in timeand experience someoneelse’s past?
What if you could go backand experience yourspouse’s childhood exactlythe way they experienced it?
Would you better under-stand their quirks and be-liefs? Would you have moreempathy for their fears andinsecurities?
What if you could experi-ence the past 10 years ofwork the way your bosshad?
Would you understandwhy he or she gets frustratedand angry about certainthings? Would it make youwant to be more supportiveand helpful?
What if you could experi-ence your parents’ child-hood? Would you betterunderstand why they actedthe way they did? Wouldyou be more grateful andforgiving?
For most of us, the an-swer to all of the abovequestions is yes. When youunderstand someone’sbackstory, their behaviorsand actions make moresense.
Business strategist Lisa EarleMcLeod specializes in sales forceand leadership development.
Why I want to invent a time machine for empathyTRIANGLE OF TRUTH
Lisa Earle McLeodSyndicated Columnist
I estimate that one-fourthof the questions parents askme involve issues or behav-iors that merit little if anyconcern. Some of the “prob-lems” in question are normalto certain stages of develop-ment. Others are nothingmore than little glitches thatwill resolve themselves intime (and might develop intoreal problems if people re-spond to them as such). Andsome are reflections of per-sonality (or temperament),which is inborn and thereforefairly fixed, although not im-mutable. ese includethings like shyness, whichmost shy people figure outhow to successfully compen-sate for by early adulthood.Here’s a short list of thingsparents needn’t worry them-selves about:
nPreschool children whohave imaginary friends, evenif the child in question seemsto believe the friend is real.
ese inventions, which typ-ically appear during the thirdor fourth years of life, arenothing more than the prod-uct of a young child’s rapidlydeveloping imagination. I al-most always recommendthat parents play along withthese additions to the family.After all, the child with animaginary friend is going tooccupy himself better andask for a lot less parental at-tention than would other-wise be the case. at’s awin-win!
n Tantrums during earlyto middle toddlerhood, evenwhen the child seems to becompletely out of control(“He acts crazy!”). At this age,tantrums are an expression ofa child’s reluctance to accept
that he isn’t the GrandPoobah. Granted, parentsshould definitely not give into them, and it might be agood idea to assign (or take)the child to his room until thestorm passes, but in and ofthemselves, tantrums at thisage are nothing to get in atizzy about.
n umbsucking. Earlyon, some kids figure out howto self-calm by sucking theirthumbs; some don’t. I’venever figured out a reliableway of getting a thumb-suck-ing child to stop, but I havefound that when parents tryto force a child to stop, theusual result is an increase inthumbsucking. As for dentalproblems, nearly all kids aregoing to have to have braces,whether they suck theirthumbs or not.
n Night terrors. ese areto be distinguished fromnightmares, which causechildren to wake up. Night
terrors occur when a childseems to get stuck in a hallu-cinatory state between sleep-ing and waking. ey are notreflective of psychologicalproblems, but they can bequite anxiety-arousing forparents. When one occurs,don’t wake the childabruptly. Just prevent himfrom hurting himself, holdhim (unless he refuses to beheld), talk soothingly, andwait for it to pass.
ne child is obviously nomore than run-of-the-mill inthe IQ department. So? Haveyou ever been to a highschool reunion? If so, yousurely noticed that a goodnumber of folks who werenot especially good studentshave managed to hold de-cent jobs, pay their bills, staymarried to one person, raisewell-behaved children, anddevelop interesting hobbies.
Many kid behaviors don’t merit concern
Caudill For City CommissionerDear Friend and Fellow Danvillian,
We are the proud family of Kevin Caudill, candidate for Danville City Commissioner.
To us, he is son, brother, nephew, uncle, cousin.To his three daughters, he is Dad.To his church, he is a Member and an Elder.To his Bate Football Team, he is Coach.To many of you, he is Friend.To the voters, he is a Commissioner.
To everyone in this wonderful town, he is the person that has represented you on the Commission since 2002, when he filled the unexpired term of his late Mother, Nancy Caudill.
He has listened to your concerns and carefully considered every issue weighing the pros and cons – then voted with a deep appreciation for the people he represents.
We know him to be thoughtful, thorough, and dedicated to doing the very best job he can to keep this “the nicest little town in America!”
We ask for your vote and support on November 6th. There are seven candidates, you may vote for four.Please make Kevin one of your votes – his name appears as #6 on the ballot.
Thank you,
Emily, Jessi and GracePatrick and Jennings McClureBruce and Rob CaudillBill and Pat CaudillDwight and Carol Moberly
Joey and Laurie KirkClaire Caudill CoxWill and Katie KirkGreg and Melissa CaudillGeorge and Patsy McClure
Paid for by Kevin Caudill
John RosemondSyndicated Columnistwww.rosemond.com
