Understanding a Father’s HeartLuke 15:1-3, 11-32

Wangaratta, 4/9/16This story’s been around a long time, so you’ve possibly heard it. A Sunday School teacher

had just finished telling the story of the Prodigal Son and she wanted to see if her class of young boys really understood what it was about. So she asked some questions.

“Who was not happy when the prodigal son returned home to his father?” she asked. One boy’s hand shot up straight away. “The fattened calf,” he said.

I’m sure he was right, but he’d missed the main point of the story! I wonder if we do, sometimes, too. I’m not sure how we came to name the story after the prodigal son; it’s really a story about the heart of God. It’s the third story in a trilogy Jesus told about lost things, not so much to his disciples this time, but to a bunch of critical Pharisees and teachers of the law who thought they knew a lot about God. They didn’t understand his heart.

It’s interesting being a father. For most of us, it isn’t something we studied or took a course in. We admire mothers, and sometimes refer to “the maternal instinct”. We often see a natural, beautiful bonding between a mother and her baby. Now there’s something there for fathers, too; but it’s different, and often not as strong. Maybe, if we had that tiny little creature growing inside us for nine months, fatherhood would come more naturally to us. Most of the fathers I know are more than happy with the status quo!

So how do we learn to be fathers? Most of us kind of pick it up as we go along, based on the father we’ve known and grown up with, plus what we’ve seen in others. Not sure that’s always the best way to start! And there’s obviously the potential for some faulty concepts and practices to pass down the generations.

Let me introduce you to my father.

We share more than just our hairstyles! Dad was fairly competitive, scrupulously honest and fair in his dealings, always ready to help others. He read a lot, didn’t have a whole lot to say, but it was generally held that what he did say was worth listening to.

Did my father love me? I’m sure he did! He was very kind and supportive of the things I did. No-one in our family would have called him warm or affectionate. That just wasn’t his way. And I didn’t know anything different, until later, and especially when I met Loris, whose father was very different from mine.

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Understanding a Father’s HeartLuke 15:1-3, 11-32

Wangaratta, 4/9/16Dad lived through some tough times; I’m sure that affected the way he fathered us. He

was the youngest of eight, with some rather bossy older sisters! He grew up during the Depression. His first wife died, leaving him with a ten and twelve year old son and daughter to raise alone, until he met and married my mother. I’m the oldest of another three children. Dad died while we were in college, thirty-two years ago now.

Let me introduce you to my grandfather.

Except Zachariah died in 1934, so of course I never knew him. I understand he had some fairly strong opinions. The story is that he would sit in the horse and cart on a Sunday morning ready for church, pocket watch in hand; and at the designated time, he drove off. If you weren’t seated in the cart, too bad!

Here’s his father, Joseph; my great grandfather.

(And that’s as far back as our family photos go). He was born in 1831. He married Maryann in 1852, and ten days later they left England for Australia. They had 13 children here! Joseph died in 1889.

Of course I’ll never know just how much the fathering skills, or lack thereof, of previous generations have made their way down to me. I do know I find myself doing and saying some things I picked up from my father; and I try to do some things differently.

Here’s a couple of fellows you might recognise!

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Understanding a Father’s HeartLuke 15:1-3, 11-32

Wangaratta, 4/9/16

Of course, if I’m suggesting I’ve been influenced by generations of fathers before me, I’m challenged to consider what I’m passing on. Barry & Paul are now fathers themselves, each with a son – and some beautiful daughters. What can I do – what can they do – to introduce some better fathering practices to benefit their children and future generations? What can you do?

This morning, while acknowledging the important role we have as fathers in our families, I want to direct our focus to a better example than our earthly role models. Hopefully, what we learn from God, our heavenly Father will help us become better fathers ourselves. From the story of the Prodigal Son, or, the Loving Father, let me note some attributes we see in our God with a big heart. Firstly, he has

1. A Welcoming Heart.

How do we know that? This was the accusation the Pharisees and those teachers of the law brought against Jesus that day. And we know Jesus reflected perfectly the values and attitudes of his Father. Those hypocritical religious leaders muttered, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.” Our Father has a welcoming heart!

What a great attribute! I read somewhere recently – I think it was through “Forty Days of Community” – that God has never made a person he doesn’t love. We should be grateful! Because most of us can be quite unlovable at times! God loves us anyway!

Can we strive to develop this welcoming heart we see in our heavenly Father? Paul reminds us that “while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”1 If God welcomes us so freely, can we extend his welcome to others? Next, from our story, God has

2. A Tolerant Heart

I struggled a bit with this one, because “tolerant” has a negative connotation I didn’t want; but I couldn’t think of a better word, so let me try to explain.

1 Romans 5:8

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Understanding a Father’s HeartLuke 15:1-3, 11-32

Wangaratta, 4/9/16The younger son’s request that day was quite outrageous. He was basically saying, “I can’t

wait for you to die, Dad! I don’t want to stay here with you. Give me what will be mine, when you drop off the perch, and I’m out of here!” Amazingly, his father agrees!

Is “tolerant” the right word? God doesn’t argue with us, when we take the good things he provides, and use them selfishly; and he doesn’t write us off. I’m challenged by that. And I know I have some work to do, to bring my attitude into line with my Father in heaven.

Closely linked to this, we see from the story God has

3. A Generous Heart.

We probably don’t need this story to teach us this; we have our own experiences. My mother in law used to remind her family to count our blessings. When we do this, there are many. God’s generosity is not just some abstract principle we believe and talk about. God has poured out his blessings on us in many ways; physically, financially, relationally; and on top of all we enjoy in this life, we have the assurance of salvation right now, and in the life to come, eternity with him.

Generosity speaks of cost. It isn’t true generosity, unless there’s a cost to the giver. We will never forget what it cost God to treat us generously. Can we ask him to give us the same generosity of heart? Can we, as an act of our wills, choose to deal generously with others?

Our story also reminds us that God has

4. A Soft Heart.

The younger son’s request must have hurt his father. I can imagine how some fathers would respond. We’ve seen, or heard, of families torn apart by acts of selfishness; and that rift can last for generations. The father in our story could have said, “If that’s the way he wants it, if he’s going to treat me like that, I’ll have nothing more to do with him. From today, I only have one son.”

Through the prophet Isaiah, God says, “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands.. .”2

Living in a family, or a Christian community, isn’t always easy. Things happen that hurt us, and threaten to harden our hearts. Maintaining soft hearts and generous spirits can be a challenge. God wants to pass on his soft heart to his children today.

2 Isaiah 49:15, 16a

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Understanding a Father’s HeartLuke 15:1-3, 11-32

Wangaratta, 4/9/16 “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you;” God says, this time through

Ezekiel. “I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you... .”3 Are we ready this morning to receive our Father’s soft heart?

Our story also shows us

5. A Heart that Waits.

“But while he was still a long way off,” we read, “his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him.”4 Many days had passed. How did his father know that on this particular day, his son would return? He probably didn’t. We see a loving father, longing for his son’s return, waiting, and watching each day, and hoping that this would be the day when his son came to his senses and came home.

It’s just a made up story of course. But that’s just the point. Jesus chose to tell the story this way, because it best illustrates the workings of his Father’s – our Father’s – heart.

Have you ever done something really dumb? Have you ever deliberately walked away from God; or maybe unintentionally drifted away? Do you know right now, this morning, that you’ve allowed some lifestyle issue, or some kind of distraction, to create a separation between you and the Father you once walked with closely? You know how you feel; how does God feel about this?

I don’t think he runs after us, urging us not to go, or begging us to return. He waits, patiently, with a longing heart. If that’s you this morning, know that your kind and loving Father is waiting patiently for your return.

How will he receive you? We know from our story, our Father has

6. A Forgiving Heart.

What an example he is to fathers today, to all of us! If I’d been wearing the father’s – sandals – that day, I know I’d have struggled with the temptation to deliver a “small lecture” to a wayward son! What a great “teaching opportunity”! What better time to gently point out the folly of his original decision, and the benefits to be gained from an older, wiser man’s advice!

Total forgiveness! Not only no lecture; hugs and kisses, a joyful welcome, total restitution. All the way home, the foolish son had been rehearsing his apology. He’s learned, hasn’t he? Such a different attitude from when he left! He never got to complete his rehearsed speech.

3 Ezekiel 36:26, 27a4 Luke 15:20b

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Understanding a Father’s HeartLuke 15:1-3, 11-32

Wangaratta, 4/9/16His father never heard his willingness to come back as a hired servant. He was too busy planning a party! His lost son had returned!

This father had two sons. His younger son was wilful, selfish, maybe a little spoilt and openly rebellious. The older son did what he was told, obeyed the rules, grudgingly did what was required, looked down his nose at his lazy, stupid, irresponsible little brother. It’s not hard to see the Pharisees and teachers of the law represented in the self-righteous older brother. Listen as the father deals with him, too. Here we see

7. A Heart that Pleads.

This fascinates me! He let his younger son walk away, with sorrow in his heart, I’m sure. He pleads with the older son to change his attitude and behaviour.

We easily see ourselves as prodigal sons, and daughters. The temptation always is for returned prodigals to turn into “older brothers”. God our Father pleads with us to change. He invites us to share his joy at the prodigal’s return. Yes, the little twerp didn’t deserve a party after walking out on us; but he’s my son; and he’s your brother.

This morning we’re seeking to better understand our Father’s heart; so those of us who are father’s ourselves can become better fathers to our children; but so we can all better appreciate our Father’s heart of love for us; and better reflect his heart to the prodigals out there maybe about to return home.

I’m sure that calf was blissfully unaware of the reason he’d been enjoying the best pasture! He wasn’t “just fat”: he’d “been fattened” – for a purpose! All the time his son had been missing, his father had been watching and waiting and planning for his return. All this reminds us, we have

8. A Father who Celebrates.

We shouldn’t miss this aspect of our Father’s heart. He rejoices when, whenever, a prodigal returns. It’s our privilege to be invited to share in the celebrations. And we do, don’t we? This is what it’s all about; and we rejoice when a child responds to Jesus’ invitation; when a teenager makes that first step, or deepens their commitment to Jesus, maybe at a camp; or when an adult, far from God in a sad and lonely place, heads for home and the Father’s welcoming embrace.

I’m so glad Jesus heard those cranky Pharisees muttering that day! Our understanding of God and his Father heart is expanded by this beautiful story. How will we respond?

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Understanding a Father’s HeartLuke 15:1-3, 11-32

Wangaratta, 4/9/16Firstly, I hope we allow it to dispel the picture we sometimes get of a harsh, judgmental

God, watching and waiting to punish us the moment we step out of line. Sin has its consequences and we will never pretend otherwise. But God is our loving Father. Jesus opens a window into his Father’s heart through this story.

This is far more than an interesting insight into our Father’s heart. This story is a personal invitation for us to return to the arms of a loving Father whose heart is bursting with good things he wants to lavish on his children.

And because this is Father’s Day, and some of us have known fathers who were less than perfect; and all of us fathers acknowledge our own imperfections, let’s allow this story to guide us. Having looked again into the heart of our Father this morning, let’s ask him to touch our hearts, and change our hearts, and give us soft, clean hearts, like his.

Happy Father’s Day!

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