FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT RELIGIONFUNNY QUOTES ABOUT RELIGION

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"I don't pray because I don't want to bore God."

Orson Welles

"And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light,

but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected."

Spike Milligan

"Adam was the luckiest man in the world. He had no mother-in-law."

Sholom Aleichem

Peter O'Toole

"When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself."

Linda Evangelista

"It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren't, then I'd be a teacher."

Jim Carrey

"Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen

to our grandparents breathe through their noseswhen they're eating sandwiches."

Rita Rudner

"I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album."

Emo Philips

"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't

work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me."

Luis Bunuel

"Thank God I'm an atheist."

Stephen King

"When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, "There's just something about you that pisses me off."

"My mother said to me, "If you are a soldier, you will become a general. If you are a monk, you will become the Pope.“ Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso."

Pablo Picasso

Richard Nixon

"I would have made a good Pope.“

"I have four children which is not bad considering I'm not a Catholic."

Peter Ustinov

Margaret Thatcher

"As God once said, and I think rightly..."

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