Forming the Conscience

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A Talk presented to the Parents of PREP Level of PAREF Southridge School on February 9, 2010.

Transcript of Forming the Conscience

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Forming the ConscienceBy Mann Rentoy

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You?You? Media?Media?

Peers?Peers?Church?Church?

School?School?

Who is forming your son’s conscience?

Historically...

Pernicious

Environment

Insidious

Clandestine

Assault on Today’s Children

Video Games

Your SonViolence in

Media

PornographyMaterialism

Hedonism

Assault on Today’s Children

Religious Indifference

False Heroes

Softness

Divorce Alcoholism

Moral Relativism

Drug Addiction

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“Values” According to Modern Environment

Killing is okay if for entertainment purposes only. Violent Video Games Violence in movies

“Values” According to Modern Environment

Virginity is only for losers.

“Values” According to Modern Environment

Suffering has to be avoided at all cost. Pleasure is supreme.

“Values” According to Modern Environment

It’s okay to cheat, for as long as you don’t get caught.

“Values” According to Modern Environment

Rock Stars and Athletes are the role models and standards of excellence.

Family Influences on the Lifestyle of the Filipino YouthGrace T. Cruz, Elma P. Laguna and Corazon M. Raymundo

• father• mother• sister• brother• older relatives/guardian• priest/minister• teacher• boyfriend• friends (same sex)• friends (opposite sex)• doctor/nurse/midwife

0.62.20.90.21.40.22.30.68.60.70.6

6.917.15.92.87.70.619.610.553.55.54.4

Most influential to respondent on sexual issuesMost influential to respondent on sexual issues

Person or group of persons Person or group of persons most helpful to R inmost helpful to R inwhat he/she knows about sexwhat he/she knows about sex

Before got married, % Before got married, % said most helpful in what said most helpful in what they know about sexthey know about sex(for married adolescents)(for married adolescents)

At present, % who At present, % who said most said most important in whatimportant in whatthey know about they know about sexsex

Family Influences on the Lifestyle of the Filipino YouthGrace T. Cruz, Elma P. Laguna and Corazon M. Raymundo

““... Parents who are perceived ... Parents who are perceived to hold a liberal attitude to hold a liberal attitude increases the oddsincreases the oddsfor the adolescents to engage in for the adolescents to engage in risky social behaviors.”risky social behaviors.”

* risky behaviors include smoking, drinking, drug * risky behaviors include smoking, drinking, drug use, commercial sex and pms.use, commercial sex and pms.

Family Influences on the Lifestyle of the Filipino YouthGrace T. Cruz, Elma P. Laguna and Corazon M. Raymundo

...those who view their parents ...those who view their parents to be more permissive are to be more permissive are expected to eventually adopt a expected to eventually adopt a more liberal attitude and thus more liberal attitude and thus are more likely to engage in are more likely to engage in risk behaviors asrisk behaviors aswell.well.* risky behaviors include smoking, drinking, drug * risky behaviors include smoking, drinking, drug use, commercial sex and pms.use, commercial sex and pms.

Family Influences on the Lifestyle of the Filipino YouthGrace T. Cruz, Elma P. Laguna and Corazon M. Raymundo

““...the protective impact of family...the protective impact of familyprayer (as an index of family control) is prayer (as an index of family control) is shown by the lesser likelihood of shown by the lesser likelihood of engaging in four of the fiveengaging in four of the fiverisk behaviors (except commercial sex) risk behaviors (except commercial sex) among those who claimed their family among those who claimed their family prays together”prays together”

* risk behaviors include smoking, drinking, drug use, * risk behaviors include smoking, drinking, drug use, commercial sex and pms.commercial sex and pms.

Family Influences on the Lifestyle of the Filipino YouthGrace T. Cruz, Elma P. Laguna and Corazon M. Raymundo

““... Adolescent who view their ... Adolescent who view their parents to have a stable marital parents to have a stable marital union are less likely to engage union are less likely to engage in the 4 of the 5 risk behaviors in the 4 of the 5 risk behaviors (except commercial sex).”(except commercial sex).”

* risky behaviors include smoking, drinking, drug * risky behaviors include smoking, drinking, drug use, commercial sex and pms.use, commercial sex and pms.

Family Influences on the Lifestyle of the Filipino YouthGrace T. Cruz, Elma P. Laguna and Corazon M. Raymundo

““... Adolescents who perceive their ... Adolescents who perceive their parents to favor smoking and drinking parents to favor smoking and drinking are more likely to adopt the vice are more likely to adopt the vice themselves. themselves.

About 9 out 10 adolescents who About 9 out 10 adolescents who thought either their father or mother thought either their father or mother approved of smoking have ever tried approved of smoking have ever tried smoking as compared with 3 out of 10 smoking as compared with 3 out of 10 among those who thought their parents among those who thought their parents disapproved..”disapproved..”

Family Influences on the Lifestyle of the Filipino YouthGrace T. Cruz, Elma P. Laguna and Corazon M. Raymundo

““... With the increasing westernization ... With the increasing westernization of mass media which threaten of mass media which threaten traditional values inculcated by the traditional values inculcated by the family, its increasing appeal to the family, its increasing appeal to the young poses serious implications. It is young poses serious implications. It is worth noting however, that family worth noting however, that family values and parental guidance continue values and parental guidance continue to show significant influence in trying to to show significant influence in trying to neutralize the effects of media andneutralize the effects of media andpeers.”peers.”

McCann Erickson Youth Studies of 2000 and 2005

... and the McCann Erickson Inter-... and the McCann Erickson Inter-generation Study of 2006 ... tell us that generation Study of 2006 ... tell us that the 16.5 million Filipino “youth” below the 16.5 million Filipino “youth” below the age of 21 are “technocentric”: the age of 21 are “technocentric”: spending an inordinate amount of time in spending an inordinate amount of time in front of either the computer monitor or front of either the computer monitor or the TV set, surfing the Internet, text the TV set, surfing the Internet, text messaging or playing computer and messaging or playing computer and video games. video games.

McCann Erickson Youth Studies of 2000 and 2005

...This generation of ...This generation of Filipino youth looks Filipino youth looks primarily to celebrities primarily to celebrities as their role models.as their role models.

McCann Erickson Youth Studies of 2000 and 2005

But even more alarming, the But even more alarming, the Inter-generation study showed Inter-generation study showed that there is a severe loosening that there is a severe loosening of moral values among adult of moral values among adult Filipinos, and this is reflected in Filipinos, and this is reflected in what young people consider right what young people consider right and wrong. and wrong.

McCann Erickson Youth Studies of 2000 and 2005

As a consequence, about half As a consequence, about half of them do not consider as of them do not consider as “wrong” such acts as casual sex, “wrong” such acts as casual sex, premarital sex, using a premarital sex, using a prostitute, getting drunk, prostitute, getting drunk, gambling, hazing, abortion, gambling, hazing, abortion, homosexual relationships, and homosexual relationships, and suicide. suicide.

1

Remember that you’re raising adults,

not children.

2

Teach the great character strengths:

•By your example•By your direction

•By your verbal explanations

3

Realize that NO is a loving word, and your children MUST hear it

from time to time.

4

Raise your children to be producers, not

consumers.

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Keep the electronic media under your discerning control.

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Listen to your children.

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Never forget: You have one and only one chance to raise your children right.

8

The greatest thing that the Father can

do is to love his wife. Children will then

learn LOVE at home.

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