Hey, Brad Rosenberg!What are you doing?

“Working.”

Want to take a trip around the Mediterranean Sea?

“Well, Okay, but you’ll owe me.”

The first stop was a layover in Amsterdam.

It was Christmas Time and Drugs were Legal!

Nancy Reagan says No to all of these people.

The airport in Spain was not as festive as Amsterdam.

But the vespas were adorable.

And EVERYWHERE!

After a couple hours of aimless wandering,I found my friend Adam Katz at the Hostel.

He is a gentleman and a scholar.

But he will attack you without warning.

The hostel didn’t have much...

But they had many suggestions for entertainment.

For instance, we could go to the theatre.

Or we could speed through Spanish Chinatown.

I decided to get drunk off of sangriawhile Adam watched.

The bar owner liked us because we ~tipped~.

After drinking, we checked out some local grafitti.

Then we went to sleep.Note: Adam bought pajamas in Spain,

and they turned out to be women’s tights.

In the morning we walked down Las Ramblas, the most famous street in Spain…

…And we got a Spanish breakfast of tortillas patatas and tomato-covered toast.

Once we were done, we looked around…

…And we found a public market!

One of the tables at that market sold MONEY!

…Which is kind of silly.

Here is Adam showing off the secret Jewish money that all Jewish people hide in their shoes.He bought some at one of the money tables, and

apparently it’s from 14th century Spain.

After buying money (?), we walked down Las Ramblas some more...

…Enjoying all of the festive Christmas decorations along the way.

This is one of them, I assure you.

But what’s this?

Why is everyone standing around watching nuns?

Are these old men going to pole vault?

Oh, I get it! It’s the Feast of the Immaculate Conception!

Nice going, lady! We salute you.

After the ceremony, we stopped at a curious store...

...That sold only candy!

The streets are really crowded in Spain...

Really crowded!

This is why some consider Barcelona the pickpocket capital of the world.

I say “some” because I have no proof of this.

Eventually Adam and I stumbled upon a Christmas Market.

A Spanish child’s favorite kind of toy is one that makes lots of nightmares.

This is the “Catedral Basílica de Barcelona”

Adam couldn’t go in because it’s a temple for a false god.

But I could!

Man, Catholicism isn’t this morbid in America...

The cathedral was still under construction...

...But the roof had a pretty cool view.

Look! It’s...Buildings!

Adam and I got hungry after churchin’, so we went to an eatery.

I got some more patatas bravas.

And a Fanta in a weird bottle.

Once we were full,Adam and I took a taxi to the cruise ship…

The Norwegian Jade!

We checked into the Cruise Ship. I continued to act like a tourist.

“This is the most decadent thing I’ve ever done.”“...”

The ship appeared to have everything we needed.

“Our room is a little high up on this…14 floor ship!”

But we were still able to get to our room.

“So they’re NOT putting us in cargo?”

We asked Glenn, the ship photographer, what we could do onboard.

He said the ship had many clubs and bars.

And an art gallery.

And a casino!

And a performance theatre!

And a GYM!

And, of course, we could always hang out with the other retirees on the boat…

But we decided against that.

Instead, we went to eat at the buffet!

Kosher

Delicious

After dinner, we used one of the omnipresent germ dispensers to clean up.

And we headed outside to say goodbye to Spain.

“Goodbye, Spain!”

Finally, we ended the night by listening to a cruise musician play the greatest hits of the ’60s and ’70s.

Adam was enthralled.