Post on 09-May-2015
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PRESENTATION FOR PARENTS & TEACHERS
Bullying is… An intentional written, verbal or physical act, including but
not limited to one shown to be motivated by any characteristic such as race, color, religion, ancestry, national
origin, gender, sexual orientation, mental or physical disability, or other distinguishing characteristics, when the
intentional act:
(a)Physically harms a student or damages his/her property
(b) Substantially interferes with the student’s education
(c) Is so severe, persistent or pervasive that it creates an intimidating or threatening educational environment
(d) Or substantially disrupts the orderly operation of a school
Simply stated, bullying…Is intimidating or subjecting a person to
hostility or ill treatment .
Involves actions which cause another person to feel afraid, humiliated, embarrassed,
threatened or shamed.
Occurs in a relationship in which there is an imbalance of power.
Is repeated over time
Bullying Happens in Five Ways:Verbal: Teasing, jokes, ignoring/isolation, gossip, threats
Physical: Blocking someone’s path, physical restraint, pushing/kicking, hazing
Sexual: Teasing, touching, slapping, pictures, emails, graffiti, sexual assault
Property: Hiding belongings, theft, arson, extortion, vandalism, destruction
Online: Cyberbullying is a type of bullying that happens online or through text messages or emails.
Bullying is NOT…A normal childhood
activityA rite of passageThe target’s fault
Differentiating Bullying from Normal Peer Conflict/Mean Behavior:
Normal conflict/mean behaviorEqual power or are friends
Happens occasionallyAccidentalNot serious
Equal emotional reactionNot seeking power
Remorse-will take responsibilityEffort to solve the problem
BullyingImbalance of power
Repeated negative actionsIntentional
Physical or emotional harmUnequal emotional reaction
Seeking control/material thingsNo remorse-blames target
No effort to solve the problem
For the target, bullying is a “loss” experience.
LOSS of safetyLOSS of self-esteemLOSS of belonging
LOSS of control over their own life
Effects of Bullying on the Target:
Physical EffectsStomach aches
Weight loss/gainHeadaches
Drop in gradesDrug or alcohol use
Sexual activityPhysical aggression
SuicidalHomicidal
Emotional EffectsAlienation
Low self-esteemInsecurity
FEARDepressionWithdrawnAggression
AngerVengeful
Warning Signs that your child may be the target of bullies:
Frequently teased, taunted belittled, ridiculed, intimidated,threatened, dominated or subdued
Has a derogatory nickname
Regularly has bruises or injuries that can’t be explained
Has belongings taken or damaged
Few or no close friends at school
MORE Warning Signs:Frequently socially isolated
Less assertive or lacks the skills to respond to others’ teasing or
Harassment
Appears weak or easily dominated
Tries to stay close to a teacher or other adult at recess or breaks
Talk with your child about bullying!
What To Do if you suspect your child is being bullied:
Talk with your childIf your child is being bullied, they need to have a voice in how
the situation is handled.
Contact the schoolSet up a meeting with your child’s teacher(s) or counselor. Consider including the school resource officer if applicable.
Develop a plan for keeping your child safe, particularly during vulnerable times (class breaks, lunch, recess).
Find out what activities or counseling options are available for your child.
Contact police or school resource officer if the actions are: criminal (assault, theft, serious threats, vandalism
Recommendations if you suspect your child is being bullied:
Don’t encourage your child to fight back—two wrongs don’t make a right!
Listen to your child, do not ignore your child’s plea for help.
Don’t confront the parents or the other child directly.
Avoid bringing your child and the bully together to elicit an apology or resolve the issue.
What about the bully?Studies show that children identified as bullies by age 8 are six
times more likely to be convicted of a crime by age 24.
60% of kids characterized as bullies in the 6th-9th grade had at least one criminal conviction by age 24.
Bullies are five times more likely to end up with a serious criminal record by age 30.
Contributing Factors Associated with Bullying:Family Factors
Lack of attention and warmthModeling of aggressive behavior at home
Poor supervisionIndividual Factors
Active, impulsive personalityLack of empathy for others
Craves attention and approval from othersSchool
School climate is perceived as uncaring or indifferentTeachers/staff unaware or unclear of bullying definitions or
how to respond
What motivates a bully?Bullies prey on an imbalance of power.
They may be seeking attention.
They need to make themselves feel more important.
They need a particular reaction from the other members of the group.
Bullies believe their behavior is exciting and makes them more popular.
What motivates a bully?They may be coping with a loss.
They may have an active and impulsive temperament.
They may be victims of bullying/abuse.
They may see violence modeled at home or elsewhere in their lives.
They may have low self-esteem.
Warning Signs that your child may be bullying others:
Frequent name-calling
Regular bragging
A need to always get his/her own way
Spending more time with younger or less powerful kids
A lack of empathy for others
A defiant or hostile attitude, easily takes offense
Frequent misbehavior at school
What To Do if you suspect your child may be bullying others:
Talk with your childNever condone bullying behavior; speak up and tell your child that
the behavior they are engaging in is considered bullying.
Encourage empathy for othersRemind your child that everyone has a right to be themselves, to choose
their own friends and to feel safe at school.
Review consequences of bullying behaviorBoth discipline consequences and relationship consequences
Reinforce respectful behaviors at homeHelp your child deal with feelings in positive ways
Contact the school for help
Set up a meeting with your child’s teacher(s) or counselor.
Develop a plan for change.
School Interventions/Consequences for Bullying:Warning
Verbal and written
Permanently documentedCoaching/Intervention
Anger Management, Conflict Resolution/ Communication/
Problem Solving Skills, Diversity Training duringschool or before, during, or after school detention.
May be provided by administrators, teachers, counselors,
school psychologists, or school resource officers
Suspension/ExpulsionReferral to Law Enforcement (if applicable)
What is Cyber bullying?
Cyber bullying- a means of using online resources to tease,
humiliate, embarrass, harass, and intimidate people on the Internet.
Cyber bullying is a serious social problem that needs to be addressed
by parents.
Remember just because it happens on the Internet does not diminish the destructive impact it has on
children.
Few examples of Cyber Bullying: A threatening e-mail , nasty Instant
Messages
Repeated notes sent to the cell phone
A website set up to mock others “Borrowing” someone’s screen name
and pretending to be them while posting a message
Forwarding supposedly private messages, pictures, or video to others. Posting derogatory videos and pictures
online
Why do kids cyber bully each other?
Cyber bullying is often motivated by frustration, anger, revenge or
entertainment.
Most kids who cyber bully don’t think it is a big deal because it occurs online.
Many kids mistakenly believe that because the communication is online
that is harmless, funny and that they will never get caught.
Many students do not think about the consequences of their actions.
They don’t think in terms of how their actions may affect themselves or others
in the future.
Possible consequences of cyber bullying: The impact on a child’s psyche can be enormous. They get the feeling that their life is ruined, that
their reputation is destroyed forever and that they will have to live with the defamation for the rest of
their lives.
How do you know if someone is being cyberbullied?
Here are some signs to look out for:Long hours on the computer
Is secretive about Internet activitiesBehavioral changes
Won't say who they are talking toMay find unexplained pictures on computer
Trouble sleepingStomach and headaches, lack of appetite, throwing up
Fear of going to out of the houseCrying for no apparent reason
Lack of interest at social events that include other studentsComplains of illness before school or community events often
Change in attitude, dress or habitsUnexplained broken personal possessions, loss of money
Stories that don't seem to make senseActing out aggression at home
Teach your child to communicate. If an adult or a child someone is being cyber bullied, do not accept the bullying behavior as a problem your child has to live with. The bullying behavior is
the responsibility of the bully, not the child being bullied
What should you as a parent do if your child is cyberbullied? :
Inform the school principal or teacher if the bullying is school related.
Save all messages for evidence.
Inform police if threatened with harm.
Stress to your kids that what is written on the Internet is on there permanently!!
What can parents do to help their child?
Be an advocate for your child.
Teach your child to be an advocate for him/herself.
Know your kids passwords.
Look for any changes in behavior.
Monitor your child’s computer use.
Establish an AUP contract for online use.
How to approach the school:Every school should have a very specific policy on
dealing with bullying. The school’s anti-bullying policy should state who your first point of contact should be. Telephone the school and request an appointment with
the appropriate person or the Principal. Have your facts prepared;
Names of children involved and of witnesses. Your son/daughter may not be the only one being bullied
The nature of the incident/sDates, times and locations of incidents
At the meeting:Ask to have the incident investigated.
Ask what support the school can offer your son/daughter, e.g. counseling or supervised mediation between the
parties if appropriate.What action will be taken to protect your child from
retaliation?
Thank you for your attention. Together we can win the fight
against bullying.Please visit the website www.Think2xTwice.org for more info about
workshops or to make a donation towards our efforts.
Visit these additional websites for Bully Resources:Think2xTwice.org sponsored site:
http://www.nowaytobullying.webs.com/Resources to keep your kids safe= www.kidpower.org
Help in a bullying situation= www.bullyhelp.orgIf someone you know is being bullied or is bullying others=
www.stopbullying.govCyber bullying info= www.cyberbullyhelp.com
Someone you know is being bullied or is bullying others www.stopbullyingnow.com
Bully policies and report by state= www.bullypolice.org