the rebellionISSUE #4
INSIDECheck Out That Glass:
A Feature on Google’s NewestWearable Technology
plus
The LongAwaited iOS Facelift
What’s in this issue?4 RHS Updates
5 Letters from the Editors
6 Charles Duncan’s Story of Success
7 Mentors Job Shadow at United Airlines
8 Ridgewood Performing Arts Students Wow Audiences
9 The 2014 Abe Books are Here!
10-11 Coming to an iPhone Near You: iOS 7 is the Update We’ve All Been Waiting For
12-13 FEATURE: Google’s Newest Tech Hint: It’s wearable!
14 Deep Topics Covered in RHS Satire Section
15 The Rebellion’s Favorite Jokes
16 Culture: Spanish Fashion
17 Culture: Italian Fashion
18 The Newest Additon to RHS & A Poem
19 Check out the Newest Club at RHS: International Club
therebellion
EDITORIAL STAFFEditor-in-ChiefAlex Hanns
Co Editor-in-ChiefPaulina Pachel
Copy EditorSkirmante Survilaite
EditorsChristy DeVolJola Pach
Graphic DesignersAlex HannsAga JarzabekGustavo Pereira
AdvisorMr. Lippstreuer
The Rebellion is written and edited by Ridgewood High School students. Opin-ions expressed in The Rebellion are the opinions of the author and are not nec-essarily a reflection of the entire staff or the school district. Anyone is welcome to submit articles to the Editor-in-Chief, Alex Hanns, at [email protected]. The Rebellion reserves the right to edit for article length and content.
Ridgewood High School7500 W. Montrose Ave.Norridge, IL 60706
VOLUME 27 ISSUE #4
“The process of making Ridgewood a quiet, focused school wasn’t easy though. A new noise had risen. Construction! A cacophonous commotion that no one could ignore. But we did. With the help of our new windows, we, the students and staff of District 234, put up with years of it because a change was imminent. Perhaps, the sound of silence was about to be heard.”
-Alex Hanns, at the Sound of Silence Ceremony celebrating the completion of the sound abatement project at Ridgewood High School
table of contents
Image Source: Google
We got a what?
culture
10
6 7
8-911
18 19
12-13
14
16-17
Comic!
Google Glass
15
Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other.Walter Elliot
The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.
Michelangelo
It is very impor-tant to generate a good attitude, a good heart, as much as possible. From this, happi-ness in both the short term and the long term for both yourself and others will come.Dalai Lama
Monday, June 10th: Graduation (in the fieldhouse). You’ve done
your time, now get out of here!
Tuesday, June 11th: Final Exams begin! With the seniors gone, the rest of
us get to continue with the daily routines of torture, torment, and death
by summative assessments.
Wednesday, June 12th: Final Exams continue. Only the strong will
survive...
Thursday, June 13th: Last day of Final Exams! Finally, summer vacation!
Last day of school! The Rebellion can officially stop trying to make the
RHS Updates humorous! (At least for all 2 and ¾ weeks of this year’s
super-duper awesomely long summer)
Thursday, June 13th: Ridgewood’s last day of school! Not exactly a news
update per se, but the Rebellion feels it is our duty to inform the
student body of potentially important dates.
Sunday, June 16th: Father’s Day. Nothing says “I love you for being the
strong, supportive, caring, masculine father you are” like a gorgeous
bouquet of flowers. Or a screwdriver. Or you can leave the screwdriver
for his wife to give and just settle for a card.
RHS UPDATES
NEWS HIGHLIGHTS
Letters from the EditorsWow! It feels like the 2012-2013 school just started last week and it’s already over. Don’t get me wrong, the school year being over is a huge sigh of relief. A sigh of relief that starts our long-awaited summer break! But before we get to that point, I’d like to pause and recognize what our school publication has done over these past 9 months of hard work. We have published 4 regular issues and the Nucleus. Now, 4 issues may not seem like a lot to you, but these issues tower over their older counterparts. We are no longer printing 12 or 16 page issues; we only print 20 or more pages of Ridgewood’s finest writing. Of course, this would only be possible with the support of every cog in the wheel. Our writers: without you, there would be no writing. Our readers: without you, there would be no purpose for writing. Our editors: without you, there would be no interesting diction and syntax. Our advisor: without you, we would be running around like chick-ens with no heads. The board of education: without you, we wouldn’t even exist. And finally, our advertisers: without you, we wouldn’t be able to print in this lovely full-color format. Thank you all! As I hope you can see, there are many people dedicated to serving the Ridgewood population. We work tirelessly, some days until 9:00 PM, to transform the Rebellion into something that has never been done before. So, cheers everyone! Enjoy your well deserved 9 weeks off. Although it may be a short summer, deal with it! It’s better than year-round-schooling!
Alex Hanns, Editor-In-Chief
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Through the Eyes of Charles Duncanby Paulina Pachel
● ● ●
Charles Duncan, the Vice President of United Airlines at O’Hare Airport, took the time out of his hectic and cha-otic schedule to sit down with me and share his outstanding successes as a leader at one of the leading airlines in the world. Ironically, this kindhearted spirit had once been a rebellious soul, seeking trouble at every corner. Never-theless, he had always been a go-getter and an incredibly hard working person who aspired to reach his goals and live up to certain expectations. In addition to that, he was athletic, participating in sports such as cross country, track and field, and basketball. His ambi-tions soared super high as he went on to receive a Bachelor’s degree in economics and international studies from the University of North Carolina and a Master’s in business administra-tion from Harvard Business School. Originally, “I considered being a banker. I had been hired by a bunch of banks and it had opened my eyes that I want to do something different. I decided to go into airline work,”
reveals Duncan. He was always inter-ested in planes and having a father in the navy while growing up had given him the opportunity to fly from one place to another. He has always loved to travel and discover different parts of the world. “We lived in Italy and every summer, I flew out to Alabama to see my grandparents. The idea of flying across the ocean has sparked an interest in seeking out a potential career in the airline industry,” said Duncan. More important than that, he has lived in various parts of the world such as Houston, Tokyo, and Guam, which enabled him to grow even more in his field. While spending a decent amount of time abroad in Asia, he has learned an immense lot and gained a lot of profound experience. “The truth is, no two days on the job are really the same,” says Charles Duncan about his current career. Being in charge of running operations at O’Hare Inter-national Airport, there’s always the unpredictable Chicago weather, deal-ing with all kinds of customers and making sure to get them from point A to point B, recent budget cuts, govern-
ment funding for traffic and too many others to wrap our heads around. All of this and much more resides in the responsible hands of Mr. Charles Dun-can. But he continues to smile from ear to ear and proudly say that: “I love my job. I come to work and I’m happy to be there.” Someone wise once said that if you find something that you love, you will never have to work a day in your life and that’s exactly what Charles Duncan is trying to empha-size. He believes that hard work goes a long way down the path of success and in order to succeed, it’s essential to find that passion and pursue it. Charles Duncan has done exactly that and he is the ultimate example of possible.
A Trip to the Airport
INFLIGHTby Iwona Cabaj
My experience at the United Airlines Field Trip was amazing. I got the chance to shadow the flight attendants. I saw where they had their offices, where they had breaks, and where they had all of their meetings. I had the opportunity see one of their briefings, the one where they were flying to Beijing. Then, I went to see the inside of two of their planes. One was going to Denver, and the other one was going to Boston. It was quite the adventure. At the end, they even gave us a gift bag filled with United Airlines shirt, sweater, books, and a mug.
CUSTOMER SERVICEby Domenico Rugo
Jamie and I were partners with our mentor, Caroline Bruno. Caroline is in charge of customer service for United Airlines. She showed us so many different “behind the scene” places in O’Hare. Caroline showed us where the flight attendants and pilots hang out before departure, and we also got to talk to a flight attendant! That talk with that flight attendant made me want to become one, too! Caroline was an outstandig mentor and in all honesty she made Jamie and me want to come back after college and apply for a custumer service job at O’hare! This experience is something that Jamie and I can say is defi-nitely a once-in-a-lifetime experience and we loved every bit of it!
CARGOby Ewelina Pachel
I had an opportunity to check out the Cargo section. I have gained a lot of useful information that I was unaware of be-fore. Their job is not only to determine shipping methods and routes from pick-up location to final destination, but they have to be accurate in what they are doing. They usually spend their work time in warehouses, stockrooms, or shipping and receiving stations. These stations are located in cold storage facilities or may be exposed to all types of weather on outdoor loading platforms. My favorite part of the field trip was seeing the ani-mals. I am a huge animal lover and it was interesting to find out how they are transferred from place to place, what types of qualifications and criteria has to be met, how old enough they need to be and what type of animals are allowed be trans-ferred. Overall, the fieldtrip was a tremendous success and an awesome experience!
On Thursday, May 23rd, the Ridgewood Junior-Senior mentors travelled to O’Hare Airport for an incredible day with Mr. Charles Duncan, the Vice President of United Airlines at O’Hare. They were split into groups of a few students, and in these groups they shadowed various jobs at the airport. Although each group will claim that theirs was the best shadow, in the end, what was most incred-ible was that Mrs. Valentino-Barry was able to provide the mentors with such an amazing opportu-nity. It was most definitely a once-in-a-lifetime experience that the mentors will cherish.
FLIGHT OPERATIONSby Alex Hanns
Our lucky group got to shadow the pilots that were at O’Hare on a special assignment. After a Q&A session and an over-view on approach patterns, we went to an ATC Simulator inside the main tower at ORD. After that, we got to see what really happens inside the tower when controllers were communicating with planes on the tarmac, telling them where to go.
STATIONS OPERATIONSby Eleni Kaldis
My job shadow experience at O’Hare airport through United Airlines is definitely an unforgettable one! I was stationed with Ms. Zakiya at the Stations Operation Control Center (SOC). It was pretty much the control center of everything! People working at the SOC are mainly responsible for sending off airplanes on time. Getting an airplane in the air, though, is not as simple as it may seem. Zakiya and others have to check with every single department to see that everyone is being punctual and getting their job done. Any delay has to be investigated and logged. Every person working had three computer moni-tors, two telephones, a walkie-talkie, and a headset- at the very least! It was incredible. There was never a dull moment. In addition to being in charge of everything involving the air-plane, Zakiya also has to keep an eye on suspicious activity, so she doubles as a security guard of sorts. I, along with the other students shadowing SOC workers, can agree that we experi-enced the best station to job shadow.
RAMPby Tania Chwala, Daniella Macrito, Erica Lopez
The United Airlines field trip was an unforgettable experience. We saw, firsthand, the duties and responsibilities that must be carried out in working the ramps. As a result, we gained a clear insight into the heart of the ramp. Ed and Marty, workers of the ramp, guided us through the steps taken for the trans-portation of baggage. There, we were able to see the process that each bag must go through before being loaded onto the plane. After seeing the endless rows of organized luggage-filled carts we were taken outside, where we were given an even closer look at the loading of the planes. At the end of our tour, we were able to enter the new Boeing 787 plane. The trip overall was both exciting and enlightening- we are so grateful and privileged to have had this opportunity.
Coffee Houseby Catherine Krol
● ● ●
On May 1st 2013, the Ridgewood
Library hosted the RidgExpo exhibit and
its annual Coffeehouse. It was here that
this year’s winners were announced. In
addition, there were over 20 acts at this
year’s coffeehouse. To kick off the show,
Mrs. Gonzalez began with a story titled,
“the Hobyahs”. Along the way there were
many interesting and talented performanc-
es such as Jazzlyn Rios and Andreea Gul-
er’s rendition of “Stay”, Franny Parent’s
performance of “First Dance” by Never
Shout Never, Jilian Andrades’s a cappella
performance of “When I Was Your Man”
and Emily Parent’s “Faces Like Mine” by
Emilie Autumn. There were a few original
compositions in the mix as well. Both
Trevor Taylor and Danielle Quinn shared
with the whole library their own creations
which both turned out to be crowd-pleas-
ers.
The closers and openers of each
act, being comical performances, were
pretty identifiable. Slushy Nikezic, Emma
Pisello and Amal Ahmed closed the first
act by dancing and rapping to “Thrift
Shop” by Macklemore. They also had
a cameo appearance by Ms. Goodman
before busting a move themselves. The
legendary saxophone quartet consisting of
Dylan Tabang, Dylan Kaczmarczyk, Ryan
Geller and Mike Jorgensen opened the
second act by performing the theme song
to Pink Panther. Finally, closing the whole
show was an encore performance by
Danielle Quinn, Anna Kadewska, Kathrin
Kowal, Daria Ginka, and Alexis Sabor
performing their interpretative dance/lip-
synching routine to “Total Eclipse of the
Heart”: a perfect way to end the year as
well as the show.
In addition to the above men-
tioned, there were other phenomenal
performances such as Karolina Klimont’s
“The Dragonborn Comes”, Cynthia
Barrios & Sara Claypool’s performance
of “I Write Sins not Tragedies”, Kamil
Bednarz’s “Ooml” and “Rhythm of Love”
with Kurt Striedl, and Ms. Goodman’s
powerhouse voice as she alternated be-
tween rapping AND singing for “Empire
State of Mind” and my own part in the
show, playing guitar for Tessa Alioto, and
later singing my own song, “Dedicated
to You” made famous by the lovely Ella
Fitzgerald.
All of these talented performers
came out to show all they’ve got and one
can confidently say it was a great way to
end the year. Many congratulations were
given to those who placed at RidgExpo
and it was a wonderful experience overall,
seeing all those people break out of their
shells to show their talents.
Nunsense!by Skirmante Survilaite
● ● ●
I have to admit, I went into “Nun-
sense” unaware of even the title of the
play, let alone the background or storyline.
However, it soon became quite clear. From
the informatory sign by the entrance (con-
veniently letting the reader know he or she
is in the “banditorium”- my new favorite
word), to the set of “Grease” with
nuns walking around, nothing was
orthodox. I was thoroughly enjoying
myself even before the play began, having
fun bothering my friends and trying to
get them to break character. Props to Mr.
Smith; I don’t know what he threatened
them with, but those kids could work for
the British. The play, although a tad long,
was incredibly enjoyable and had me
laughing my heart out. I had two
favorite parts:
1) The little “pop quiz” the audience
was a part of. What a great way to make it
interactive and hilarious! Catherine Krol is
a master at improv.
2) “Rush.” ;) Now, where can I get my
hands on that stuff..?
All in all, “Nunsense” was pretty won-
derful. It definitely lived up to what was
promised, and once again, the Drama
Club sure did deliver!
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by Elizabeth Krol● ● ●
The Abe books for next year have been revealed and they did have a party to celebrate it. The Abe book award celebration
2013 was held at the library on May 22, 2:10 pm. In this celebration they gave away books, treats, and most of importantly theyre-
vealed the Abe books of 2014. This event was very casual; you could just walk in and enjoy the fun. They had pizza, cookies, pop, and
music to make it just a bit better. Here’s the list:
22 Ridiculously Rad Reads!
Across the Universe Beth RevisAshes Ilsa Bick
Cinder Marissa MeyerDaughter of Smoke and Bone Laini Taylor
Divergent Veronica RothEverybody Sees the Ants A. S. King
Every Day David Levithan The Fault in Our Stars John Green Five Flavors of Dumb Antony John
Hate List Jennifer Brown How to Save a Life Sara Zarr
I Hunt Killers Barry LygaLegend Marie Lu
Marcelo in the Real World Francisco X. Stork The Night Circus Erin Morgenstern
The Pregnancy Project Gaby RodriguezPurple Heart Patricia McCormickReady Player One Ernest Cline
Room Emma Donoghue Shadow and Bone Leigh Bardugo
Stupid Fast Geoff Herback Wintergirls Laurie Halse Anderson
Gets a Face Liftby Alex Hanns
● ● ●
Every year since its conception in 2007, Apple has updated the software of the iPhone. Whether it be a grand improvement over last year’s rendition or a mea-ger enhancement, it goes through the improvement cycle constantly. But, lately, Apple has only added onto what it had already created. Not many parts of the original graphi-cal user interface have been recreated. With iOS being six years old already, it’s about time for that to happen. And it did. With a new person in charge of software design, Jony Ive, the same guy that headed up the development of almost all of Apple’s technological beauties, iOS finally got the chance to be completely rethought of, completely revamped from a whole new perspective.
Apple engineers began creating the new face of the iPhone with three goals in mind: to make it simpler, more useful, and more enjoyable. This redesign isn’t just about the physical appearance of the OS, it’s about the way it works. They have simplified many common actions, like turning on Wi-Fi or Bluetooth, or opening another app to use the phone’s built-in flash as a flashlight, with the addition of Control Center. Now, whether these were all Android features way before Apple implemented them is another story. Let’s save that for another article! Speaking of copying other systems, many have speculated that Apple would follow suit with the trademark Windows Phone 8 ‘flatness,’ but they have actually gone in the opposite direction. Depth is their number one improve-ment in iOS 7. In the product video for the new operating system, Ive explains the purpose of having different planes of software elements: “these planes, combined with a new approach to animation and motion, create a sense of depth and vitality.” This new motion that he refers to is a minor detail that enhances the whole iPhone experience. Adding to the small enhancements, Apple has also redesigned every stock application that comes on the iPhone. In Photos, there are now three categories for your photos: collections, moments, and years. Instead of just scrolling through the camera roll, it will soon be possible to pinpoint pictures from your vacation to New York, and more specifically, photos from Times Square, the Em-pire State Building, and Central Park. Camera also got a redesign, although less useful to some. You can now take pictures that are perfectly square and apply different filters to them while you’re taking the picture. Basically, it’s of-fline Instagram built into the iPhone’s camera app. Safari was also on the list of revamped apps. It features a non-in-trusive navigation bar and a unified search field so you can search with ease. Every other app -- including Messages, Calendar, Weather, Maps, Notes, Reminders, Game Center,
Check out the new home screen. It’slifesize!
Check out the iOS 7 video at:http://www.apple.com/ios/ios7/
Newsstand, iTunes, the App Store, Mail, and Music -- all were updated with the new white theme of simplicity and clarity. Other areas of the iOS have been updated too. No-tification Center now has three tabs: today, all, and missed. These three buttons lead to three different areas with dif-ferent purposes. The ‘today’ tab displays the date, weather forecast, and calendar appointments for the day. The ‘all’ tab is basically what Notification Center has been since iOS 5s release. And the ‘missed’ tab shows all of the notifica-tions that haven’t been touched yet. Multitasking, another feature that was left alone since its initial release got redesigned with iOS 7. Now, instead of a tiny multitask-ing bar that pops up from the bottom of the screen, a whole new, full screen interface fills the screen with app previews, something many speculators were hoping for. You can also flick the apps away to the top of the screen to close them. Lastly is Siri, the ‘personal assistant’ that was supposed to be quick and easy to use and help us in our day-to-day life. Since its creation, it seems to more of a hassle than actually doing the task that it would automate. Now, hopefully, Siri got better! With a new transparent interface and cool audio waves moving across the screen when you talk, Siri has be-come more intelligent. Siri can search Wikipedia, Twitter, and the web right inside the interface. No more switching app insanity. Aside from the apps, iOS 7 adds a few brand new functionalities to the iPhone. With Control Center, as was mentioned before, there is easy access to frequently used settings, a flashlight, timer, calculator, and camera, as well as screen brightness and volume. This little panel that slides up will in-crease efficiency when you need one of those settings or features that was packed away in the Settings menu or a folder. AirDrop is an-other fitting feature of the
new OS. It lets you share a photo or document to someone right next to you by using Wi-Fi or Bluetooth instead of a text or email. A few little things add up to a big conve-nience. But the best feature of iOS 7 is certainly iTunes Radio. It’s a streaming radio that lets you make stations of your favorite song or artist. It’s completely free, but there are ads occasionally, unless you subscribe to iTunes Match. Hmm… sounds just like Pandora to me. The only real dif-ference is the ability to ‘tune’ your radio station to different modes like top hits, discovery, or mix. There is also a ‘buy song’ button near the top of the screen if you would like to listen to it whenever you want. But honestly, nothing groundbreaking here. Aside from the illusion of a brand new music solu-tion and some of the most interesting app icons (see Safari, Game Center and Newsstand), iOS 7 is such an improve-ment over past updates of iOS. The whole is definitely greater than the sum of its part in this case. While it may seem like separate updates for each application, there is a unifying theme across the OS of two seemingly opposite characteristics: simplicity and depth. When combined in just the right way, it creates an immersive and captivating experience for the user that no one could resist.
Get ready everyone. An update is coming.
Check out that
You might’ve heard of Google
Glass. If you haven’t been paying atten-
tion to the news these past few months,
then imagine one of those futuristic visors
you might see in a science fiction movie.
It’s something along those lines, but
designed to be minimal and productive.
It’s hard to believe that what we thought
was science fiction is actually going to be
real. The point of Google Glass is to fight
the distractions technology causes, and to
make the interaction between humans and
technology more fluent. Though wearable
computing has been around for some time,
no product has ever been this close to truly
becoming beneficial.
Here’s the rundown of the events
leading up to now:. Project Glass was
first announced with a concept video on
April 4, 2012. Without any details, people
didn’t know much about Glass; many even
believed it to be pure conceptualism. Glass
then made an explosive display at Google
I/O 2012, Google’s annual developer
conference. The presentation by Google
cofounder Sergey Brin featured a live
stream of skydivers flying from a plane,
and bikers riding on top of the confer-
ence hall’s roof. All this was live streamed
through a Google+ Hangout, using each
athlete’s Glass camera. That day, develop-
ers were given the option to sign up for
the ‘Explorer’ version of Glass, the beta
version of Glass that would be used by a
small amount of people.
Later that year, Glass was named
Invention of the Year (2012) by Time
Magazine. On February 20 of this year,
Glass went all out. A new video was
released, realistically showing how it felt
to use. The same day, an official site for
Glass was opened and can be found at
google.com/glass (it’s worth a visit). The
Explorer editions have shipped to the early
adopters and Google is hoping on releas-
ing to general public by the end of this
year.
Developing a new frontier in
technology isn’t an easy task. Creating a
device that is intimate yet non-intrusive
was a challenge. Technology has always
been right at our fingertips, but not in a
way that allows us to focus on something
else without worry. Glass aims to keep you
in the moment while you use technology.
Basically, Google is perfecting multitask-
ing.
Yes, people think Glass looks
weird, and even creepy. Many won’t even
consider buying it once the time comes
because it’s just too weird looking. Society
is far from looking upon Glass as a normal
device. But with so many uses for it to
come, it should be worn. And seriously,
hasn’t the Prius already set the precedent
of functionality and practicality over tradi-
tionality?
As can be expected for a totally
new type of device, the Glass is very lim-
ited in its capabilities. But of course, core
Google features are there, and new apps
like New York Times, CNN, Facebook,
and Twitter are emerging. With developers
finally getting Glass, the magic is about to
happen. Google Glass is very much like
the iPhone. When the iPhone was first
released, there was no App Store. The
iPhone had the basic features of a phone,
albeit with a smartphone twist. When the
App Store came along, developers started
making apps, and the iPhone became a
revolutionary product. Glass is very much
like this. As apps begin to surface, Glass’s
actual purpose will grow. Though, as
Glass grows, there are also growing pri-
vacy concerns. Some people panic that
they might be filmed with Glass
without them knowing.
But that’s kind of
an invalid
by Joe Barnas
concern, since if you’re in the bathroom
and someone with Glass walks in, they’d
have to be looking directly at you the
whole time to film. No doubt that person
would know if someone is staring right at
them.
Right now a lot of journalists
are reviewing Glass and are extremely
disappointed with it, giving it a bad name.
It’s as if they expect it to be a full fledged
computer from the moment of its concep-
tion! Obviously Glass is very limited. Not
only is it barely a fledgling device, it’s
not meant to be worn by the public yet.
Despite this, there are some problems that
Google will improve by the official prod-
uct release. The battery life is pretty bad,
and that is agreed upon unanimously. For
Glass to be a viable tool and to be worn
all day (as meant to be), the battery will
be improved. From there, internet con-
nectivity should be a bit more optimized
for Hangouts and the sound is a bit hard to
hear in very crowded areas. Even with all
the quirks Glass has now, it will become a
practical tool, and a more efficient way for
everyone to communicate.
Glass ushers in a new era of tech-
nology that may just change how people
and technology function individually and
cooperatively. For all the oddities and
problems it has, people should remember
that this is V1.0. Without a doubt, Glass
will become a driving force in computing
and find a way into many people’s lives.
The possibilities with Glass are endless,
and this is the start of it all. Welcome to
the Future.
What is possible with Glass, right now
What is possiblein the future
Take a look at the potential of Glass in these online videos:
If you’ve ever pondered the meaning of life, you know it
is no easy task. It involves sitting on your couch and not coming
up with a real reason for our existence. But you can stop ponder-
ing now. I’ve discovered the true meaning of life, and I doubt
you will disagree with me when I say that it is, without a doubt,
frozen yogurt.
There is no life problem that cannot be solved with some
froyo. In fact, giving the entire U.S. congress unlimited access to
a froyo machine might actually give them enough time to agree
on a few things, possibly change a few things instead of arguing
with no end result- emphasis on “might”. When faced with the
unbelievably difficult decision of picking a flavor- vanilla versus
chocolate or maybe coconut, possibly birthday cake, and what
about a little bit of everything?-, they may realize that coming up
with a resolution once in a while isn’t as difficult as it seems.
With all the cute gummy bears and brightly colored sour
worms, maybe the Republicans and Democrats would stop play-
ing U.S. politics like two opposing football teams. Last time I
checked, they were supposed to have different ideas but still work
together for the good of the same country. Obviously, this is a lot
more difficult said than done, but I’m sure spilling a little marsh-
mallow topping on their fancy suits would ease the tensions.
The price is honestly the best part about frozen yogurt.
You see, you will think that you took a modest amount of yogurt
and just a few toppings, but as soon as you weight it on a scale,
it turns out that the U.S. deficit seems pretty small in comparison
to the amount you’re paying for brownie bites. Maybe if the U.S.
Congressmen and women took a few stabs at being “one of the
people” as their advertisements make them out to be, they would
realize that it really isn’t “lazy” Americans that can’t afford the
new living style of America.
After all the excitement of picking out the flavor and the
toppings and getting a really cool spoon to go with it, after enjoy-
ing the heck out of that seriously delicious dessert, the people
of Congress will realize that they aren’t very full because eating
frozen yogurt is essentially eating frozen air with Kit Kat pieces.
Maybe it will be the push for them to realize that this is exactly
what they are serving the public- words made to sound nice that
really come out as a lot of air and don’t satisfy the people.
Satire Compilation by Jola Pach
The Meaning of Life
Though since the beginning of human life, food has
been used as a source of energy, it is now becoming outdated in
its usual purpose for teens around the world. Now, food is used
mainly to take interesting photography shots meant to be upload-
ed to Facebook off Instagram.
Making others jealous of a delicious meal is no easy
task. In addition to the difficulty of choosing the perfect food, it is
crucial to arrange the food in an innovative, artsy style. This can
take anywhere from a couple minutes to an hour, depending on
the complexity of the food. Then comes the most important part:
choosing an effect. A seemingly simple hamburger can turn into
a masterpiece when Earlybird, Lomo-fi, or Sutro is used and the
texture of a smoothie is just not the same without Nashville or
Walden effects.
After all the work put into taking the picture, many teens
find that they are no longer interested in eating the food, espe-
cially without the added effects. Most of the food that decorates
Facebook pages is thrown away after getting the desired amount
of Facebook “likes”.
Food Losing Its Purpose Among Teens
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The Rebellion’s Favorite Jokes
1. So, a dyslexic man walks into a bra...
2. My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was
amazed; I never knew they worked!
3. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption.
One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named
‘Amal.’ The other goes to a family in Spain, they name
him Juan’. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to
his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her hus-
band that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.
Her husband responds, “But they are twins. If you’ve
seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.”
4. There’s two fish in a tank, and one says “How do you
drive this thing?’’
5. Three blondes are walking through the forest when
they come across tracks. The first blonde says, “Run!
They’re bear tracks!” The second blonde goes, “No
dummy, they’re deer tracks!” And the third blonde
counters, “You’re both stupid! They’re clearly rabbit
tracks!” They were still arguing when the train hit
them.
6. “I’ll tell you what I love doing more than anything:
trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly
contain myself.”
7. “ Slept like a log last night... Woke up in the fire-
place.”
8. ‘’I went to the zoo the other day; there was only
one dog in it. It was a shitzu.’’
9. A blonde is driving past a field of wheat, the stalks
waving in the wind like an ocean of gold. She sees
another blonde in the field, yelling “Help! I’m drown-
ing! Someone help me!” She jumps out of her car and
starts yelling, “You’re the reason people make blonde
jokes! You’re the reason everyone thinks blondes are
stupid! I’m so fed up with blondes like you ruining life
for the rest of us! I swear, if I had my kayak I’d paddle
out there and slap you in the face!”
Estrella Archs is a phenomenal 39 year old Spanish fashion designer from Barcelona, Spain. She graduated from the
Central Saint Martins College of Art and Design in London, England. She has worked for Vogue as a fashion journalist
and also for Pucci and the House of Emanuel Ungaro in Paris, France where she was able to grow further in the fashion
industry. Her true colors emerged during Paris Fashion Week of 2007 as she showed off her first ever collection of designs.
Her designs revolve around women and specifically their body movement. Archs’ inspiration is derived from the move-
ment of dancers and the movement of the female body. Because of such a unique and practical approach to fashion, Archs’
designs look good on any female body because of their perspective flow and angle. Any female can put on a blouse or a
dress designed by Archs and feel great about the way their bodies present themselves in the clothing and feel comfortable
from the material that their clothes are made of. The target market of Archs’ fashion line is of course young and sophisti-
cated women, however older generations are also welcome to wear Archs’ fashions. It has the effect that it looks great on
anyone no matter what the age may be.
Estrella Archs es una diseñadora muy fenomenal que tiene siempre treinta nueve años de Barcelona, España. Ella era un
graduando de Central Saint Martins College of Art and Design en Londres, Inglaterra. Fue una periodista de moda para
Vogue y fue una trabajadora de Pucci y La Case de Emanuel Ungaro donde tenia mucho mas experiencia de moda. En
2007, empieza su carrera en la moda durante de Paris Fashion Week. Para la diseñadora, el movimiento del cuerpo de la
mujer es muy importante en sus diseños y la ropa. Su inspiración de su nueva colección fueron los bailarines y por eso, su
moda es muy moderna. Ella diseña para los mujeres joven pero también los mujeres que son tan poco mayor.
Spanish Fashion
Moda Española
by Paulina Pachel
moda, belleza, moderna
Fashion is very important in Italy. The fashion capital of the world is Milan. Many designers hail from this
city. Milan is considered to be the fashion capital of the world. We can find many designer stores on the famous street
Via Montenapoleone. This is a very elegant and expensive area in Milan. Armani, Versace, Dolce e Gabbana, Ferragano,
Max Mara, Gucci, Prada, and Valentino are famous designers in the world and they all have their headquarters in Milan.
The designers get their fabrics from Prato, a small town outside of Florence. The city of Florence is also important in the
fashion world because many leather goods are produced by artesans here.
Max Mara, a famous Italian designer house, was established in 1951. Achille Maramotti started to design the
couture clothing in 1947. Max Mara’s has many different labels, but their main label is womens’ wear. There are 2,254
different store locations in 90 countries around the world. Max Mara is famous because this house pretty much decides
the hot color of the season. None of the other designers are supposed to know the color, but they find out what the color is
and, inevitably, use the colors in their own lines.
Milan has had a major impact on international fashion. Their fashion history has greatly evolved throughout the
years. Milan has been the main center of fashion since the late 19th century. Milan later became a major producer of silk
and textile productions. Clearly, Milan has played a major role in fashion.
La moda è molto importante in Italia. La capitale mondiale della moda è Milano. Molti stilisti famosi proven-
gono dall’ Italia. Milano è il centro della moda. Specificamente, troviamo molti negozi degli stilisti più famosi su Via
Montenapoleone. Questa strada è molto elegante e costoso. Alcuni stilisti italiani famosi sono Armani, Versace, Dolce
e Gabbana, Ferragano, Max Mara, Gucci, Prada, e Valentino. Sono famosi in tutto il mondo. Tutti gli stilisti prendono il
tessuto per creare le loro linee di moda da un piccolo paese fuori di Firenze. Il tessuto Prato. Firenze è anche importante
nel mondo della moda perchè a Firenze si fanno articoli di pelletteria. La pelle è una parte importante della moda.
Una casa di moda famosa è Max Mara. Questa casa è stata avviata nel 1951. Achille Maramotti ha iniziato a pro-
gettare l’abbigliamento couture nel 1947. Max Mara ha molte etichette diverse, ma l’etichetta principale è womenswear.
Ci sono 2,254 negozi in novanta paesi del mondo. Max Mara è importante perchè decide il colore della stagione. Nessun
altro stilista dovrebbe sapere il colore, ma inevitabilmente, tutti gli altri stilisti usano lo stesso colore nelle loro linee.
Milano ha un grande impatto su tutta la moda internazionale. La loro storia di moda si è evoluta notevolmente nel
corso degli anni. Milano è stato uno dei principali punti di moda dal diciannovesimo secolo fino ad oggi. Milano in seguito
è diventata un importante centro di produzione della seta e del tessile, e certamente per tutta la moda.
Italian Fashion
Moda Italiana
by Jen Mazurkiewicz
moda, bellezza, moderna
Ridgewood Installs Hot Tub for Teachers
New Lifeby Christy DeVol
Colors of carnation, citrus, and coralClimbing to the cloudy air;
Lighting the garden of floral;Reflecting the lake of clear.
Canaries call for their love;Doves dance with their love.Finches feed for their young;
Squirrels skip with their young.
Meaningful morning, full of flowers,Fresh in the floral sky.
Bubs blooming their petals,Blowing life to grow.
New lights, new love, new life.
With the money the teachers raised from their Blue-Jean
Fridays and students’ library fines, they purchased a hot tub.
With Ms. Flinn’s supervision, the hot tub is installed on the
green roof that students are not allowed on just because the
teachers say so.
It is opening day.
Gates and Wlodarczyk are having a splash war in the tub
as LoBianco attempts to relax outside the splash range with
a (non-alcoholic) drink in her hand and Book yells “Bollocks
to the rules!” from the sideline.
Gates decides to carry out a Psych experiment and mea-
sure Mundy’s reaction to various disturbances. She ignores
everything Gates does, absorbed in reading her book on a
lounge chair in the corner.
Wlodarczyk aims a splash at Lehotsky, who is tanning
nearby. However, the splash heads in Mundy’s direction.
Mundy lifts her eyes from her book, gives the splash a sharp
look, and the splash changes direction.
Lippstreuer shows up with a beach ball and does a can-
nonball into the middle of the splash war, singing the intro to
“The Lion Sleeps Tonight.”
Parrillo is building a sandcastle nearby, and A is trying to
shake sand out of his hair. All of it.
Book has moved underneath a giant umbrella and is sitting
in the shade, texting. LoBianco joins her and they order an-
other drink from the student slave, erm, helper, Alex Hanns,
that the teachers happened to procure with the help of Ms.
Kelsall and Dr. Lupo.
Laubenstein and Forestiere bury Glogowski in the sand,
and he exclaims that he can see stars.
Goodman shows up with a floppy hat and picnic basket
filled with heirloom tomatoes.
Demann and McCarthy are having a squirt gun war. She
pulls out a supersoaker and McCarthy makes a run for it.
Deutcher appears, wild-eyed and out of breath, searching
in vain for McCarthy. He is near tears, feeling lost without
his best buddy.
A picnic food fight breaks out. It is Hansen and Romano
versus Miller and Portanova; tacos and spaghetti are flying
everywhere.
The door flies open. Ms. Slack stares at the scene for a mo-
ment. She raises her eyebrows at the teachers, then swiftly
turns and walks away.
The hot tub is never spoken of again.
- - -
written by Emily Parent & Skirmante Survilaite
by Jola Pach● ● ●
If there is one thing about Ridgewood that is im-mediately noticeable, it is the fact that we are a very unique mix of various ethnicities. This year, a new club has risen to the task of uniting all the different people and cultures that make up our school. Under the leadership of Mrs. Rud-nicki, the club advisor, International Club has had a busy first year, with several bake sales of different ethnic foods and “grad grams” to raise funds for a field trip to Navy Pier. The field trip was both a way for the club members to bond and a way for them to experience the culture that they all share: the very distinct world of Chicago. To celebrate what unites them as a club, the members went on a boat ride to see fireworks and got a taste of Chicagoan cuisine. Though one of its main goals is, of course, to spread awareness of all the different cultures that give our school its diversity, International Club President Kathy Bar-nas also sees another reason why the new club is special.
According to her, the club also exists “to make people of all cultures feel accepted”. For her, the club is a way for stu-dents to feel proud of their heritages and to give members a place in the school where they know they fit in, where they are always welcome. The members of the club come from various places around the world, including Poland, Germany, Ireland, the Middle East, Spain, Italy, Ukraine, Russia, and Bulgaria, among others. International Club is a place where students can learn about others’ cultures while sharing the most cherished traditions of their own. From here, the International Club hopes to increase membership and help bring cultural acceptance to Ridge-wood. Just in its rookie year, International Club won third place in the Homecoming Parade, and we will have to see if they can knock out some of the more experienced clubs again next year. New members are welcome; meetings are Thursdays after school in Mrs. Rudnicki’s room, Room 226. We look forward to seeing International Club expand and accomplish its goals in the upcoming years!
International Club
Hours: Monday-Thursday 11:00am - 11:00pm; Friday & Saturday 11:00am - 12:00 midnight; Sunday 11:30am - 10:30pm
Teachers and students rate Vince’s #1!Come and try our Rigatoni with Vodka Sauce.
Our entire menu is available for Delivery and Carry Out 7 Days
a Week!
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