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Her soul was sleeping, floating in the cold, blue, cloudy water of melted dreams.
For so long, she had felt she was in a mysterious place, where mummies whispered in
Egyptian hieroglyphs secrets that long turned to dust, and the ancient song of the lute
once again danced over Sahara el Beyda, the White Desert, where giant chalk
mushrooms rise from the sand. She could not remember the light. She had beenswallowed in darkness for so long that now sunlight was a distant dream. Dust, so much
dust. It coated her throat, making her want to cough, but she couldnt move. She was
frozen in time, and yet, she sensed, time marched around her, continuing while she
stayed still.
A man was shuffling about her, moving crates and wheezing. She could see him in
her minds eye, a little whisper of a man with a long, silver beard in a dirty blue uniform.
Suppose he found her? Would that be so bad? She heard his sharp intake of breath the
moment he moved a crumbling mummy aside and saw her lying on golden silk, her hair
cascading over the pillow like rippling honey. And then, she felt herself being moved,
and the dust dancing as the man pushed her away. What would happen now she had
been discovered? She didnt know. The man ran away, calling for help.
* * *
She felt trapped. Her mind swirled around as she felt thousands of eyes staring at
her, whispering her name. Banners with her name plastered the walls, announcing her
as the newest exhibit at The Metropolitan Museum of Art. She didnt want to be an
object that everyone admired. She wanted to live again, to feel the wind on her face and
dance in a field of wildflowers. She wanted to escape.Someone was staring at her. There was something different about the way he
looked at her, as if he cared about her and didnt just want to eat her with his eyes.
* * *
The boy took a breath as he stared at the girl with the golden honey hair. There
was something about her that glowed, that separated her from the hordes of people that
crowded over her like shadow vultures. He wanted to whisk her away to his abandoned
warehouse in the Bronx and bring her to life.The boy stayed in the museum bathrooms till midnight, creeping out of a stall as
soon as security passed to make his way toward the glass box.
There she was--shining like a sea star in the moonlight. What if someone caught
him? He carefully opened the lid and lay it down, his heart thumping wildly at every
sound. Her hair danced like waves as the wind ruffled it, and he thought he heard her
sigh at the welcome breeze. He wanted to kiss her. His heart beat as his face got closer
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and closer. He blushed as red as a cherry, stroking her hair that glowed. His lips gently
touched her pale pink lips, and at that moment, pure joy flew in his heart.
As her eyes fluttered and opened like a blush pink camellia blossoming in spring,
he took a sharp breath and pulled his face away. Her eyes were lazuline blue, like a clear
blue sky in daytime and were rimmed with dark, thick, curling lashes.They looked at each other, and in his head, he felt as if he were dancing in a
sphere of warm golden light.
* * *
She took a deep breath and tried to sit up. There was a strange boy staring at
her.
Where am I, Village Boy?
Shhhhhhhhhhhhh!Well be discovered if you shout.
Huh?
Were in The Metropolitan Museum of Art! There are guards everywhere!
Of course there are guards everywhere. Theyre guarding my castle.
No! You were a display. I kissed you and bam! You came alive. I dont know
how I did it.
You kissed me!!!!! How dare you? Where is my castle?!
What castle?
My CASTLE!
Whos THERE?! yelled a security from around the corner.
Both Aurora and the boy jumped.Shhhhhhhhhhh! The boy whipped around to clamp his hand over Sleeping
Beautys mouth before she shouted anything else.
Unhand me, you peas--hghhj!
Come on! We have to find a way out without being seen.
Jdlkfajsdkl!
We dont have time to talk!
With one hand clamped over her mouth, they tip-toed around security and
slipped out the EXIT door as quiet as two shadows. What they didnt know was that her
bejeweled dress was so old that with every step, Aurora left a path of diamonds,sapphires, and pearls for the shadow that trailed them to follow.
* * *
What dungeon is this? Aurora asked, sweeping her eyes over trash-filled
warehouse they had just entered.
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Its my home.
Oh. Sorry.
Its okay. I know its not a fairy tale castle, but at least you have a place to stay.
Aurora looked around, scrunching her nose as she searched for something that
resembled a bed. But all she saw was trash and weird sculptural objects scatteredaround the room.
What is all this?
My inventions.
What?
They are machines and robots that help me do chores and dishes.
Oh. So you mean servants.
Sort of, but theyre not alive.
Aurora wandered around and finally found a broken chair upon which to sit.
Then, she looked at the robots as if she expected something.
Arent the robots going to serve me tea?
Um. No.
Scrunching her nose, she muttered under her breath.
Excuse me?
Nothing.
It was going to be a long night.
* * *
In the morning, Aurora yawned grumpily as she made her way through the grayocean of trash to the door, she looked at the village boy hammering away at another of
his inventions. She wondered how could he wake up so early and not make a delicious
breakfast for her. Instead, he was busy making another trash sculpture. Chivalry must
have died while she was sleeping.
Hello?
No answer. Instead, he ignored her and kept on hammering.
How rude, she thought. He cant just kidnap me and ignore me.
She stalked up to him, her hands on her hips.
HELLO! she yelled, smacking him on the head.OW!!!!!! he cried, plucking cotton out of his ears. Whyd you do that for?
You didnt cook me breakfast and serve me!
Was I supposed to? he asked, looking incredulous.
Of course you were! You are a village boy and I am a princess!
He rolled his eyes.
Boy, if Id known you were this much trouble I wouldnt have woken you up.
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She glared at him. He sighed.
First of all, my name is not Village Boy and I am not your servant.
Then who are you?
My name is Brandon.
Oh. Never heard of it.Its ok. Whats yours?
Oh, you never read my biography,Sleeping Beauty? It was penned by the
Brothers Grimm.
Oh! No wonder you looked familiar.
How could you not know? she asked, her hands on her hips.
Hey, Im a guy. After I saw you, I didnt exactly read your plaque.
Aurora blushed, then tried to hide her pleasure.
Oh. I guess thats okay.
* * *
After they finished arguing, they caught some pigeons on the roof, speared them
with wire hangers, and roasted them in the fireplace. It was then that Brandon noticed a
trail of gems on the wooden dusty floor.
Why is there a trail of gems following us?
OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!! yelled Aurora, covering her mouth as if she didnt get
voted as homecoming queen.
What? Its just gems leaving a trail from the...........MUSEUM!!!!!!
I dont care about the museum! Lets talk about how you are going to sew thegems back on my beautiful dress!
But if someone follows the gems, they will know where you are. Duh! he
replied, rolling his eyes.
Dont you dare talk to me like that! I should be treated like a princess, not a
peasant like you!
I am not a peasant! How many times do I have to tell you?!
Whatever. Aurora shrugged.
Brandon sighed.
Ok, so we need to retrieve the gems. And we also need to distract security fromseeing them.
What do you mean? Ill just tell them not to look at my gems. Theyre my
guards--theyre here to protect me.
No, you are not a princess anymore. You are a person in the modern world.
Fine, she muttered.
Brandon rolled his eyes heavenward, praying for divine intervention.
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None was forthcoming.
Well, first we have to change your name and clothes. You cant walk around
wearing a silk dress that leaves trails.
What? Change my amazing name and beautiful dress? Aurora looked like she
was going to faint.Ignoring her, he looked through a pile of what looked like a lump of grey
something.
Aha! I found something you can wear!
What? Aurora asked, starting to look nervous.
This! he replied, holding up a faded pink shirt with some skinny jeans.
What is that THING?! she yelled, then ran out the door to throw up.
Its not that bad! he called out. I mean, that was the best thing compared to
the other ones.
There was no response--only the sound of a flushing toilet.
He shrugged, then went to get her a glass of water.
* * *
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Aurora screamed, looking at herself in the
half-shattered mirror.
You look fine, Brandon muttered under his breath.
EXCUSE ME?! A GIRL LIKE ME HAS TO LOOK NICE, UNLIKE YOU! she
yelled, furious.
Ok, whatever. Whats important is what were going to call you.Humph!
Hmmmm. How about Candice, Megan, Kayla, Katherine, Karen, Elise, Juliette,
Hope, Audrey, Skyler, Katie, or Lucy?
Ive never heard of any of those names. They must be peasant names, she
replied, frowning.
How about Erin, Alex, or Ashley? Brandon asked, looking hopeful.
Ewwww. What kind of name is that?! she replied, scrunching her nose.
Whatever, Ashley is now your new name, and if anyone asks who you are, say
that youre my sister, okay?Your sister? I am a peasants sister! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! she
screamed, furious. How dare you make me say I am your sister! This is making me
want to throw up again!
He decided the best thing to do was to ignore her, so he started getting ready to
leave.
Where are we going? Where are you taking me? I order you to tell me at once!
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How dare you ignore me again?! I am queen, you know?! Tell m--hjkjkkh!
Sssshhhhhh! I think I heard something outside!
Outside was a shuffling noise that sounded like a person trying to get past the
prickly bushes in front of the window. Had someone discovered them? What would
happen? They tip-toed toward the window with his hand over Ashleys mouth.Stop trying to talk, he muttered under a low voice.
Gkjhkjhfuheuhfkjdhfue!
Shhhhhhhhhhhh! Hey! OOOOwwwwwww! Dont bite my hand, Brandon
squealed as he looked mournfully at the red teeth marks swelling on his hand. He
quickly took away his hand away from her mouth.
Ha Ha Ha! Dont mess with the princess, the girl said triumphantly.
Fine, but be quiet!
The shuffling noise turned and melted into another direction. Soon, it was gone.
What was that noise?
Theyre probably my guards, Ashley said, her nose high.
I dont know whom that was, but theyre definitely not your guards.
If theyre not, Ashley said, giving Brandon an arch look. Who is going to save
me... from you?
Rolling his eyes, Brandon headed towards the door.
Hey! Dont leave me in this place! Ashley cried, throwing her arms around him.
Brandon froze at her nearness, shook his head to clear it, then resumed marching
toward the door, plucking gems off the ground along the way.
Dont drag me! Carry me!
What?! Why?Because Im precious, Ashley replied.
Fine, Brandon said, grumbling as he swept her off her feet.
Thank you, Ashley said simply.
After long hours of misery (of carrying a rather heavy princess twenty miles and
picking up after her gems), they finally made it to the museum.
I think I got all of them, Brandon groaned, tossing the last gem in his backpack.
Are you sure you only weigh 115 pounds?
Ashley lifted her chin. Its my dress thats heavy, she said pertly. Not me.
Anyways, were here.What kind of place is this? Another dungeon? Ashley asked, sniffing
disapprovingly at the odor of steaming garbage and gazing in awe at the steam swirling
up from the sidewalk grates.
No, its New York, Brandon replied. Thats the subway rumbling beneath us.
Dont worry--there are no dragons here.
I was kidnapped by a dragon once, Ashley said airily. My knight saved me.
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What knight? I didnt know you had one.
Every princess has a posse of knights sighing over her.
Now Brandon was looking a little steamed up.
Oh yes, the Black Knight was my favorite. He would hide in the bushes and
worship me from afar, Ashley said dreamily.Oh?
And then there was Agravain. The very sweep of my skirt would make him
flush. And darling Brangain! You should have seen his face the day I condescended to
speak his name.
Now steam was really swirling out of Brandons ears, but Ashley didnt seem to
notice. He took a deep breath and continued toward the museum.
Come on, Ashley, stop talking about all your knights and dragons, Brandon
groaned. And if anyone asks--were married, were from Minnesota, and were
tourists.
Ashley sniffed and tossed her nose into the air, then grudgingly followed Brandon
into the labyrinth of the museum.
Where are we going?
Were picking up more of your precious gems, Brandon sighed.
Oh, ok, Ashley said, grinning.
He trudged up toward the door, still lugging Ashley on his back, and groaned as
he swung open the heavy door.
Stop! a deep voice commanded.
Brandon froze, then sighed, realizing it was the security they had so tried to avoid.
You have stolen property on your back. the security guard barked.This is my wife, Ashley, Brandon said, looking offended.
Im pretty sure that is Sleeping Beauty. She looks exactly like the book I read as
a kid.
Ask my wife, shell tell you.
Im not property, Im a prin--
Brandon shot her a look.
-cipal of school! Yes! I love children.
We have ten! In Minnesota...where were from. Brandon pulled out a battered
old wallet with a photo of ten children smiling up at a camera.These kids look nothing like you two. Theyre not even the right color, the
security guard muttered, eyeing them suspiciously.
Oh, we adopted them, Ashley said. From China...India...and Timbuktu.
I see. So there is not a drop of royal blood in you? Your name is not Aurora
Elizabeth Catherine Juliet Beauty?
Ashley squirmed. She really did love her name.
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No, sir, Ashley muttered as Brandon squeezed her hand. Im Ashley Brown
from Minnesota, mother of ten.
Ok then, move along, the security said gruffly, still eyeing their every move.
They quickly scurried through the door out of his sight.
Whew, Brandon said, wiping rivers of sweat off his forehead.Mother of TEN? Ashley yelled. How old do you think I am?
Brandon looked at her appraisingly. Oh, I dont know...four hundred and forty?
How long were you sleeping anyway?
Ashley swatted him. Never say a girl is fat or over twenty-five, she glared at
him.
Gosh, woman these days, he said, rolling his eyes as he ambled toward Ashleys
glass case to scour the floor for any last gems.
And thats when Ashley spotted it.
My CROWN!! she cried, pointing to a gold diadem dripping with jewels
surrounded by a posse of armed guards. I forgot all about it! Brandon, will you fetch it
for me?
WHAT?! Brandon roared, staring at her as if she were crazy. Do you want us
to land in jail?
You can sacrifice your life for me now, she said, sweeping her hand through the
air as if it were nothing.
Why would I do that for a crown?
Not for a crown. For me.
Brandon groaned. Remind me never to kiss sleeping fairy-tale women in
museums--no matter how beautiful they are.Just get the crown for me.
Fine, Brandon harrumphed.
He stalked up toward the posse of armed guards.
Hey! Guess what?! Lady Gaga is outside!!! Go meet her now--shes giving out
autographs!
A stampede of excited people hurried out the door, leaving nothing but an empty
exhibit hall.
Ok, lets go before they notice that Lady Gaga isnt actually there.
What do you mean we? Youre suppose to fetch it for me and place it on myroyal head.
Brandon trudged up toward the glass case and flipped open the top. A blaring
sound started to reverberate the room as blinding red lights began to flash. Police sirens
trumpeted as loud as elephants.
Uh-oh... I forgot about that, Brandon whispered.
My hero, Ashley said, rolling her eyes.
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We need to get out of here fast! Brandon said, tugging on her arm, but before
they could, policies swarmed into the room.
STOP, THIEF!!! yelled a police officer.
The idea of being accused of stealing my own crown, Ashley huffed.
Come up with a story fast! Brandon whispered desperately.That is my story. If my parents were here, they would have executed all these
rude peasants for their impertinence!
What? a policeman asked, looking confused.
How dare you talk to me? Ashley asked, looking offended. Dont you know
who I am?
Brandon waved his arms in alarm and mouthed the words NO, NO!, but Ashley
was too outraged to notice.
I am Her Ascendent Highness Aurora Elizabeth Catherine Juliet Beauty,
daughter of King Charming and Queen Pearl, and first in line to the royal throne.
Your Highness, we then arrest you for stealing yourself. And with that, the
police officer pulled out a receipt that said, One Sleeping Princess on Bed: $1 million.
Brandon peered over her shoulder. That date is today. Who bought you?
And then, he looked at the signature at the bottom of the page.
Oh no, he groaned. Its the President.
Oh, there are always world leaders trying to buy me. Mom and Dad had to shoo
them off all the time.
It says here that he wants you as a toy for his children.
Oh.
* * *
Ashley wasnt liking jail at all. The beds were too wobbly, the food was stale, and
the rats were the size of cats. Plus, the other inmates kept leering at her.
I order you to release me! Ashley screamed, shaking the metal bars, glaring
down at the guards.
No can do, the guard replied, scratching his bushy chestnut beard.
Its no use, Ashley, Brandon sighed, sitting in the corner with their rat
roommates.They have to. I am stilla princess, Ashley huffed, her nose high.
Wait, Ashley--come over here for a second, Brandon whispered, gesturing.
Cant you see Im busy with something?
Just come over, Brandon whispered, frustrated.
Ashley groaned. Curious, however, she dawdled toward his corner.
Ok, we have speak really quietly so nobody hears us, ok? Brandon whispered,
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looking very serious.
Ashley nodded, her eyes sparkling as they widened with curiosity.
Have you ever heard of Choi Gap-bok...the legendary escaped prisoner?
Brandon asked.
Never.See that food slot over there? Choi Gap-bok escaped through that. Maybe we
can squeeze through too.
How? asked Ashley, her eyes widening.
We have to wait until they serve us a greasy meal.
Ashley wrinkled her nose. Great.
* * *
Brandon nudged Ashley in the shoulder to wake her up.
Ready? I saved some greasy leftover chicken for us.
Ashley groaned as she covered her head with a ragged blanket.
Come on. Dont you want to be free again and wear your princess dress?
Ashleys ears perked up.
And your diamond high heels. Brandon continued, waggling his eyebrows.
Fine! Ashley said, flipping over the blanket.
Ok, Brandon said. Rub this chicken everywhere.
Ashley scrunched her nose.
You mean MY HAIR?
Thats the most important part. Once you get the head through, the rest is
much easier, Brandon replied, handing her the chicken.
Ashley sighed and reached for the chicken, then rubbed it all over her head.Im getting you back for this, Brandon.
Brandon grinned. Ive always wanted to see chicken all over you head.
Ashley shot him a look that would have slain a dragon.
Whistling, he grabbed a chicken wing and rubbed it on his face. Ah...this makes
me hungry all over again.
When the two were finally greased up, they both paused as they stared at the tiny
6 x 17 slot.
Huh. Good thing I took Princess Yoga.
Great. Then you should go first.Taking a deep breath, Ashley knelt and imagined herself flowing like water
through the slot. With a pop, her head slipped through and
Help! Im stuck!
I can see that, Brandon said, trying not to laugh.
Ashley shot him a look. Just get me out of here!
Fine, Brandon said, smiling,
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He grabbed the chicken and rubbed it all over her neck and shoulders while she
groaned at the gross greasiness.
There now, just slide through--you should be able to slip through now.
Using her hands and arms, she pushed backwards and plopped to the ground.
Oww Ashley whispered, massaging her shoulders.Now my turn.
Brandon stood up and stretched as if he were getting ready for a swim meet.
Oh, just hurry up already! Ashley cried, throwing a chicken at him.
Geez.
Brandon crawled into the slot, and just like Ashley
Help! Im stuck!
Ashley just laughed at him. Now I know how funny it was to watch!
Brandon laughed too. I know, right?!
Ashley crouched and rubbed chicken all over his head, laughing.
Gosh, this grease is gross, Brandon complained, scrunching up his nose.
She stood up, staring at him as he pushed through the slot, groaning. Finally,
Brandon squeezed through.
Ow Brandon moaned, rubbing his back.
Now what do we do?
We need to get the keys, Brandon whispered, gesturing toward a leather belt
dripping with keys. He tip-toed toward the janitors closet and grabbed two suits.
Ashley just groaned. Not again.
Brandon grinned as he handed over the dirty blue suits. Wear this. That way,
we can sneak out without anyone noticing us.She zipped it down and stepped into it, frowning.
Ready? Brandon whispered.
Ashley nodded.
They walked to the snoring security.
Hello, Brandon said in a British accent, nudging him in the shoulder.
The startled security jumped up in surprise. Who are you?
The janitors, Brandon replied.
How come Ive never seen you before? security asked, suspicious.
Oh were new here. We just got hired, but we need the keys to get out of here,Ashley said.
Bam! The iron door flung open and marched in a very tall man wearing a black
and white suit. Behind came three guards wearing sunglasses.
Where is my daughters toy, Sleeping Beauty? demanded the man.
Oh no, its the President, whispered Brandon.
What! Ashley whispered, startled.
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Just act natural.
She is right in that cell next to me, replied security, pointing to the cell.
I see nothing but a empty cell! the President exclaimed, furious.
What? She was there a minute ago, the security said, horrified.
The President, who looked like he was about to explode, yelled at him.How dare you lose Sleeping Beauty! She is a Christmas gift for my daughter.
Dad, shes right there, said a shrill voice.
A tiny plump girl in a flowery pink dress and sparkly pink heels marched up,
pointing at Ashley.
There she is.
We were just having her do a little spring cleaning, the security guard said,
grinning nervously.
What the.? demanded the President, gazing incredulously at his daughters
bedraggled toy.
Suddenly the tiny girl burst out crying, Daddy! My Christmas present is ruined!
Seize him!
Ashley grinned. I used to say that all the time.
Two Secret Service agents materialized out of the shadow and grasped the
hapless security guard.
B-but I didnt do anything! cried the security guard, thrashing his fists at the
agents shoulders.
Take her too. And her servant boy as well, the President demanded.
Ashley grinned at Brandon, who just ground his teeth.
* * *
In the White House, Brandon and Ashley were tied up in chains.
Well, at least these are better accommodations, Brandon said cheerfully, gazing
around at the famous office he had heretofore only seen on the news.
Ashley harrumphed.
Except we have Miss Brat as our guard.
The little girl was glaring at them, her feet wide and her arms crossed in her best
imitation of her favorite Secret Service agent, Crusher, who had guarded her since birth.Were just janitors, Brandon said, nervously staring at the team of guards
surrounding them.
Riiiightthen how come you dont have a file? Miss Brat asked, flouncing
toward a file cabinet that stretched to the ceiling. We have a file here for every person
in America except you.
Umm. Brandon whispered. Oops.
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See? Miss Brat said, flinging open a cabinet marked JANITORS. No record
of you.
Ashley and Brandon just sat on the Presidential Seal, looking miserable.
Lets go, Sleeping Beauty, Miss Brat said, grabbing Ashleys arm. You too,
Servant Boy. Its Play Time.Miss Brat dragged Ashley into her room while Brandon reluctantly trudged
behind. She flung Ashley onto her golden bejeweled princess chair and started sparkling
her face with glitter powder.
Now you look beautiful. But not as beautiful as me, Miss Brat said, fluttering
her eyelashes while Ashley rolled her eyes.
Servant Boy, go fetch me chocolate chip cookies with milk, Miss Brat demanded.
Brandon groaned. He didnt want to walk all the way across the lawn to the White
House kitchen and then back to her hot pink sparkly playhouse in the garden. But when
Crusher glared at him, he hurried off, ten guards in tow.
After what seemed like hours, Brandon finally made it to the kitchen. Shiny pots
and pans hung from the ceilings, while chefs in tall white hats bustled about, too busy to
notice a boy.
Excuse me, Brandon said, nudging one chefs shoulder. Do you know where the
chocolate chip cookies and milk are for Miss Brat?
MISS BRAT! yelled a chef, frightened looks sweeping through the room.
O-oh I meant Miss Brandon started.
Its ok, dear. We call the Presidents daughter Miss Brat, too.
Whew! I thought I was in trouble! But how come you guys are so frightened?
Oh! Miss Brat is always causing trouble for us. As the Presidents only child, shegets really spoiled, a plump woman said wryly.
When she put beetles in the Presidents corn soup last Tuesday, Luigi got fired.
Now hes living in a cardboard box on Independence Avenue.
Wow, thats mean, Brandon said, an idea beginning to ferment in his mind.
Youd better bring her hot cookies and milk before she erupts.
Brandon grabbed the chocolate chip cookies and milk, then swung open the heavy
door and took a deep breath. It was a long walk to the playhouse, but there was so much
to do along the way.
First order of business: Snack.He began to nibble on the warm cookies. Maybe this job isnt too bad, after all,
he thought. These cookies are delicious!
Hmm...should I take one bite of each cookie or eat them all and leave one? Or
maybe leave one with some teeth marks in it.
Boy, this is fun.
And tasty.
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By now, the guards were giving him furtive smiles. They looked like they were
trying not to laugh. This was encouraging.
And now for the milk.
Whoops! Brandon cried as the milk went flying, and he had to do some pretty
fancy acrobatics to rescue at least some of it. Unfortunately, that meant including a fewants, some blades of grass, and some First Lawn dirt (with worms, of course), but Miss
Brat definitely looked like she needed some extra greens and protein.
By the time Brandon swept through the playhouse door, all but one of the cookies
had been eaten and the milk looked like a grassy mud smoothie.
Miss Brat looked up from where she was curling Ashleys hair (burning was more
like it).
Its about time, Brat snapped, yanking Ashleys hair until the poor princess
winced.
Help!Ashley mouthed silently, gazing at Brandon with pleading eyes.
Where are my cookies?
Brandon smiled and handed her the plate with one bitten cookie and a glass of
grassy milk.
WHAT HAPPENED TO MY SNACK?! Miss Brat shouted.
It was a long walk! Brandon protested. I got hungry, but I saved you one.
Miss Brat looked as if she were about to explode. Her face puffed as steam
whistled through her ears.
How dare you sully my snack? Miss Brat shrieked.
I saved you one, Brandon said, handing her the bitten chocolate chip cookie.
CRUSHER! Miss Brat yelled.The door burst open and in came Crusher.
What happened? Crusher boomed.
This servant, Miss Brat said, pointing her finger at Brandon, gave me this
snack.
She handed Crusher the plate.
Oo, thanks! You finally saved me one.
Crusher downed the cookie in one bite, then polished off the glass of milk.
Ummgrassy.
Miss Brat stared at him in disbelief, her mouth like a train tunnel.What? Its delicious, Crusher said, wiping his mouth on his sleeve.
How can you eat that? Miss Brat spat in disgust. Youre supposed to terminate
him.
Oh. Right! Crusher said, moving to cuff Brandon.
May I be terminated too? Ashley asked, looking hopeful.
No! Im not done beautifying you yet. Tomorrow, you will look just like me.
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Miss Brat beamed.
* * *
At midnight the next evening, Ashley was alone in her room, staring at her
reflection. What was left of her hair looked like she had gotten an electric shock, and her
face was garish with Miss Brats idea of beauty. She was garbed in a pink taffetaballgown that was so itchy she felt she was being eaten alive by a thousand fire ants, but
since Miss Brat had burned all her clothes, she had nothing else to wear. As for her
shoes, Brat had put her in teetering expensive stilettos that made walking out of the
question. She was begging in her mind for Brandon to come and save her from Bratzilla.
Knock, knock!
Sleeping Beauty, its time for dinner! Miss Brat shouted through the door.
Oh NO! Ashley whispered, her hands covering her face in despair.
Come on, I know youre in there. Dont make me come in and drag you to
dinner.
Think fast!Ashleys mind whirled. Ill just pretend to be asleep!
Miss Brat banged on the wooden door, yelling like a maniac. Ashley ran to her
four poster Victorian bed, flipping the covers over her just in time.
Oh, no! Sleeping Beauty is asleep! How will she go to dinner with me? Miss
Brat fumed, crossing her arms.
Ashley held her breath, afraid to move a single muscle. Shehad get rid of Miss
Brat!
Hmm, Miss Brat mumbled.
As the little terror marched up towards her, Ashleys heart pounded so hard she
could hear it. Miss Brat was the worstnightmare she had ever had, except she was real!Ashley shut her eyes and prayed.
Sleeping Beauty, I know youre awake, Miss Brat whispered, shaking her arms.
How does she know!? Im not even moving!Ashley thought, holding her breath.
With a sigh, she gave up.
Oh, hello, Ashley said, plastering on a fake smile that disguised her pain.
Come on, come on. A princess is never late for dinner! Chop chop! Hurry up!
Miss Brat exclaimed, clapping her hands.
Ashley swung her legs over the bed.
Oh! Look at you! What a mess! Miss Brat complained. I just made youbeautiful like me! Look at you now! Ill beautify you before dinner, dont worry, Miss
Brat said, smiling with her sparkling hot pink lipstick.
Not again!Ashley thought, plastering her fakest smile at Miss Brat.
Hehehe, I got the perfect dress for you! Just wait til you see it! Miss Brat said,
snapping her fingers. Crusher! Bring me the dress!
Crusher barged in holding a sparkly pink dress covered in a nightmare of flowers,
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beads, and frills.
Yay, Ashley said, her face turning green as she gulped.
I knew you would like it! It was especially made for you--I have the same exact
dress! We can be twins! Miss Brat squealed, waving her arms.
Ok, haha, Ashley laughed weakly.Miss Brat dragged Ashley into the dressing room.
* * *
Five minutes later
OMG! Look at us, we are so cute in this dress! Miss Brat squealed, her smile
reaching from ear to ear while her hands waved wildly.
Ashley had no words to say. The dress was worse than the one before! Her hair
still looked like a electrocuted blob, except this time Miss Brat thought it was a great idea
to dye it hot pink! Fake jewels lined her eyelashes with glue, and hot pink glittery eye
shadow covered her eyes. The dress puffy scratchiness burned her skin.
Wheres Brandon?!Ashley thought angrily. What had happened to her servant
boy?
Come on, Miss Brat said, pushing her through a golden door.
The dining room table was long and lined with velvet chairs. Sitting all the way at
the end of it was the President.
Hello, princess, the President said, smiling at his daughter. You look beautiful.
Brat beamed. I know, right? This dress was made specially for Sleeping Beautyand me!
She twirled in circles and pranced around the table as the President beamed.
Bravo! My beautiful daughter, you are truly talented!
Ashley rolled her eyes. She had to escape from this assault on her sensibilities.
Tiptoeing towards the golden door, she slipped like a bright pink shadow into the hall.
Now she had to find Brandon.
* * *
Ashley found a door labeled Dungeon. As she swung it open, her eyes widened
in astonishment. She could not believe her eyes! Disco music pounded the air while
people gyrated to the rhythm, and standing on a table was Brandon! He was dancing
ebulliently as if he had not a care in the world as people clapped and shouted.
Brandon! What are you doing? I thought you were locked up in the Dungeon!
Ashley yelled at the top of her lungs.
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But he just kept dancing, oblivious to her rising fury.
Vibrating with outrage, she stomped up the table.
BRANDON! Ashley yelled into his ears.
Oh! Hi, I didnt see you! Did you have fun with Miss Brat? Brandon asked, his
eyes wide with innocence.Ashleys eyes bulged as hot air whistled from her ears.
What do you think? I was getting tortured while youre here having the time of
your life! Ashley fumed, glaring at Brandon.
Hahaha! Its ok, at least you werent thrown into jail with dozens of rats!
Brandon laughed.
Ashley glared at him, then let out a sigh. Fine, lets go now. I have a feeling Miss
Brat is going to notice me missing!
Brandon jumped off the table.
Hello? Forgetting someone? Ashley said, crossing her arms as she glared down
at him.
Gosh, Brandon mumbled, kneeling so she could walk down his back like a
human version of Sir Walter Raleighs cape.
Sniffing, Ashley walked delicately down Brandons back. No hopping off tables for
this princess.
Thank you, Ashley said, sarcasm dripping off each syllable.
They tip-toed out of the dungeon, slipping into the darkness.
Do you know a way out of here? Ashley asked.
Yep! This way, Brandon said, turning right.
They walked down halls, turning sharply once in awhile. Brandon stopped in frontof a wooden door.
Are we there yet? Ashley asked, worried that Miss Brat would drag her to her
doom at any minute.
Right in here! Brandon said cheerfully as he swung open the door.
Inside were tables of desserts piled on top of each other like delicious bricks.
This isnt--oh. Ashley stopped, staring at the mountain of desserts in
amazement.
What do you think?
Ashley stood there, speechless. She did have a sweet tooth.Brandon was already running into the cake-filled room. Ashleys mouth still hung
wide open as she gazed at the piles of sweets, drool slipping out of her mouth.
After shaking her head in amazement, she ran toward a chocolate cake oozing
with strawberries. Soon, her face covered with cream, chocolate, chocolate sauce, and
sprinkles.
Hey, whered you go?
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Ashley ran past towers of sweets until finally, she spotted a carved wooden door
alive with tiny beautiful fairies. Her breath caught in her throat as she stared at them in
amazement. One fairy was strolling through a field of wildflowers garbed in a gorgeous
strapless gold gown. A gauzy diaphanous cape adorned with white and gold curlicues
flowed like a river from her slim white shoulders, while her diaphanous wings were sodelicate it looked as if a sneeze would blow them away. Golden hair rippled in waves
from the crown of her head, and her slender neck turned with the regality of a swan
toward a colorful bird perched on her slim hand.
And that was just one of them. The whole door was alive with fairies with
different colored gowns, hair colors, and personalities.
It was the angry fairy who caught her attention. She was garbed in flowing black
smoke with a dark lace mask over her face, and she looked lost and petulant at the same
time. Ashley wondered how someone so beautiful could be so angry. The fairy was
sitting cross-legged on a grassy bank, staring moodily at her reflection in a sparkling
sapphire river.
The door shimmered, and Ashley reached her hand out to touch it. To her
surprise, her hand rippled the door as it sank into the fairy scene, and for a moment she
could hear an incalculably beautiful fairy opera and inhale the scent of flowers.
Startled, she pulled her hand away, her heart pounding so hard she could hear it.
Where was Brandon?
She ran back through towers of toppling cakes, calling his name. Suddenly, she
heard a rumble reverberating from inside the largest cake in the room.
Brandon?
In here! called out a voice from inside the cake.Where? Youre not in the cake, are you? Ashley asked, staring at the cake in
amazement.
The top of the cake exploded in a shower of chocolate lava, and from the top of the
cake popped Brandons head.
Hello! Brandon chirped with a wave.
What are you doing there? Come down right now--I need to show you
something!
Brandon reluctantly climbed out of the delicious cake, dancing on subsequently
shorter cakes as a staircase.Ashley tapped her foot impatiently, bursting with impatience to share the magical
door with him. She had to practically drag him to the door as he kept getting distracted
by each delicious flavor they passed.
Look! Do you see them? Ashley asked, pointing at the door that was alive with
dancing fairies.
What? This old wooden door? Brandon asked, his head already turning back to
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the tantalizing desserts.
Dont you see them?
See what?
The fairies! Ashley said, pointing at the door.
Nope, all I see is an old rotting door.Ashley sighed in frustration. Then, an idea bloomed in her head. She took
Brandons hand and placed the other on the door. Now do you see them?
Wait, how did you do that? I saw fairies! Brandon exclaimed, his mouth wide
open. If there was anything that caught his attention more than cake, it was beautiful
women.
I dont know. Do you think we can go inside the door?
The two looked at each other, holding their breaths. Without another word,
Ashley grasped Brandons hand and plunged her other into the door.
The next they knew, they were walking through a field of flowers, and the air
shimmered with song. It took awhile before the two realized it was the flowers who were
singing and dancing in the warm breeze.
Whoa! Where are we? Are we in the door? If we are, then where are the
fairies? Brandon asked.
Ashley gazed around her surroundings. Then she heard a muffled laughter.
Hello? Brandon, did you hear that?
She turned around and found Brandon lazily floating in a chocolate river, a
dreamy expression on his face.
Ashley rolled her eyes.
Brandon! Focus, were in a magical fairy world!Fine, Brandon pouted with his chocolate-smeared face.
Hahaha! Muffled laughter exploded from the flowers.
What was that? Brandon asked.
Curious, Ashley waded through the sea of giggling flowers.
Ah-ha! Ashley yelled, grabbing someones foot.
Let me go! screamed a squeaky voice.
Brandon took this chance to run back to the chocolate river, where he again
plopped down lazily into bliss.
Meanwhile, Ashley was interrogating her kidnappee.Who are you? Ashley demanded, dangling the fairy by the foot.
Blossom Perkytoes. Will you put me down?
The fairys voice grated on Ashleys ears like cheese on perforated metal.
She carefully placed the fairy down.
Whats your name?
Ashley.
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Ashley inspected the annoying little fairy. She wore a short emerald dress with
little sandals made of vines and leaves. Her honey-blond hair was piled up in a messy
bun that bobbed up and down as she squeaked.
Whos that funky-looking chocoholic over there? Blossom asked, staring at
Brandon floating peacefully in the chocolate river.Well, that funky looking guy is Brandon. Hey, would you mind telling us where
we are?
Fairyopolis! Blossom squeaked, making Ashley wince. Do you want a tour?
Um...sure.
Ashley was so curious about this new world she was willing to endure Squeaky to
know more about it.
Should we invite Brandon too? Id hate to disturb his lunch, Blossom squeaked,
tittering into her tiny hands.
What? Ashley asked, giving a start as Blossoms eyes transformed from
laughter to terror.
Suddenly, Ashley noticed that dark shadows had spread across the field.
W-whats going on? Ashley asked, her face turning blue.
Oh, no! She came back! We need to find shelter! Blossom whispered hurriedly.
Quickly, Blossom grabbed Ashleys arm and ran straight toward a giant green
mushroom, which apparently was Blossoms house.
Lighting ripped through the darkness as rain poured like silver bullets from the
sky. Running as fast as they could, they finally reached shelter.
But as soon as they were inside Blossoms cozy house, Ashley knew something
was wrong. Ashley felt as if she had forgotten something. A red capitalized word flashedthrough her mind--BRANDON!!!
Wait! We left Brandon in the chocolate river! We have to go save him! Ashley
shrieked, her face blue with cold and dripping with rain water. Her eyes widened with
fear. What would happen to Brandon?!
Oh, NO! He was in the chocolate river! Blossom cried, groaning.
Whats going to happen?
When She comes, the milk chocolate river swirls into an underwater tornado,
sucking everything inside Her lab! Blossom squeaked, her hands waving in giant circles.
The green sparkles that had been delicately floating around her were now shootingthrough the air like green fireworks.
Ashley didnt bother to ask Blossom about whom she was speaking. She had to
save Brandon, even though he was an irritating lout.
Do you know where her lab is? Ashley asked, starting to feel anxious.
Nobody knows where the river leads, Blossom said, flying around her house as
she threw supplies into two knapsacks. Well just have to follow it.
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Ashley and Blossom held their breath as they stared at the door leading outside
into the storm. It was warm and cozy and quiet inside Blossoms mushroom house, and
Ashley was suddenly having second thoughts about saving Brandon. Was the lout really
worth it?
An image of Brandon squeezing through the jail slot with greasy chicken smearedall over him flashed in her mind, and she remembered everything they had been
through together and how he had tried to help her regain her life. Annoying as he was,
he was all she had, and part of her kind of liked him. Taking a breath, she opened the
door, grabbed Blossoms hand, and plunged into the storm.
* * *
Ugh, are we there yet? Weve been following this river forever, Ashley
groaned, dragging her blistered feet through the tall grass that grew beside the
never-ending river.
Hey, I wanted to go home days ago, Blossom said cheerfully. Youre the one
who likes Brandon.
I do not!
Blossom just grinned at her.
I just...Im just trying to do the right thing. As hisfriend, Ashley harrumphed,
walking so determinedly she banged right into the green hedge that suddenly shot up
right in front of her.
Oh!
Ashley stepped back, rubbing her nose in dismay.Great. Now what?
Blossom looked troubled.
Oh dear.
What?
Its The Death Hedge.
The Death Hedge? Ashley asked, looking around. What do you mean by that?
Its a maze. No one has ever gotten out of it alive. And no one can fly near it
either. It disables your wings.
Ashley groaned, then gazed up into the sky where the hedge finally ended.Well, there has to be at least one way out. Ashley whispered, her mind whirling
with an idea. How good are you at climbing?
Blossom thought for a second, then smiled.
Well, good thing I packed gloves.
Blossom opened her knapsack and handed Ashley a pair of woven leaf gloves,
then donned a pair herself.
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Here! Blossom squeaked.
As Ashley slipped on the soft leaf gloves, she gulped as she thought about climbing
the hedge. She was deathly afraid of heights. Brandon had better appreciate this.
* * *It wasnt as bad as she had thought. It was worse. As they climbed, Ashley
cursed Brandon in every language she had learned in Princess Academy.
Why did you have to get sucked down into a evil fairys lab!Ashley grumbled as
she dug her nails into the rough hedge.
After what seemed hours, Ashley stopped.
Can we rest? Ashley asked, breathing heavily.
Nope, not till we get to the top!
Ugh, as soon as I get home Im getting a princess pedicure.
Suddenly, Blossom gasped.
We made it! Were at the top! Blossom squeaked, her face full of excitement.
Wait for me! Ashley shrieked as she looked down.
Wow! Blossom gasped, her eyes widening.
As Ashley made her way to the top, she was speechless. The ground had become
a sheet of misty blue clouds that tickled her toes, making her laugh.
Where are we? Is this heaven? Ashley asked, staring into the world of
shimmering mist.
No, silly--were on the clouds! Blossom squeaked as she skipped into the clouds
of mist.
Laughter echoed through the area. Wait, whered you go?Boo! Blossom yelled.
Ah! Ashley screamed as she tripped across something.
Are you ok?! Blossom asked, diving into the sea of mist. Where are you?
Right here. I tripped over something. For some reason, it felt like a person.
Hmm...is this it? Blossom asked, holding a foot in the air.
Whoa! Ashley gasped, backing up. Who is that?
Can I have my foot back, please? said an irritated voice.
Blossom dropped the foot back into the cloud of mist looking curious. A dark
figure popped up from the clouds grunting.Cant someone have a good sleep? the figure grumbled.
Excuse me, but who are you and why are you sleeping out here? Ashley asked,
smoothing down her dirty shirt.
Well, my name is Jack and Im sleeping here because this is my house. Jack
said, rubbing his eyes.
Wait, are you the legendary Jack and the Beanstalk? Blossom asked, her eyes
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widening.
Yep! Now, will you guys tell me why you guys are here and how you got here?
Jack asked, his eyebrows lifting.
Well, we climbed up from the Death Hedge.
Were above the Death Hedge?! Jack asked, Wow, the clouds are moving fasterthan usual!
Do you know a way out of here? Ashley asked, gazing around the misty world.
Yep! Follow me! Jack chimed as he disappeared into the fog.
Ashley hurriedly scrambled
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