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© Copyright, 2018, Satyam Chowdhary
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Completely Axehausted
Journey of a CA Student
Satyam Chowdhary
EDUCREATION PUBLISHING (Since 2011)
www.educreation.in
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Disclaimer
Author himself is a Chartered Accountant and deeply
respects all its rules and regulations. The mention of
„dummy articleship‟ made in the book is to show the
importance of articleship in the CA student‟s life and
how can it change the life of a CA student. The author
has mentioned only the general notion about it and does
not intend to demean the importance of articleship in the
CA curriculum.
This is a work of fiction. All the characters and
incidents in this work are imaginary, any resemblance to
any person dead or alive is purely coincidental. The
author does not intend to outrage, insult, and wound or
hurt any religion or religious sentiments, beliefs or
feelings of any person(s), class or community.
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Acknowledgement
Writing an acknowledgment was the toughest part of the
novel but let me start thanking with my English teacher,
„P.C. Sir‟ who taught me to write English and my
inspirer, Nitesh, who has motivated me to restart writing.
My girlfriend cum wife, Ankita, who was with me all
throughout this 6 and a half years when I was writing
this at a snail‟s speed and without her support, this
would not have been possible at all. Thanks to Sahil,
Rashmi and Rohit who are not avid readers but still took
out time to read this even when it was not edited by the
champion editor, Malobika Di from Mono-translation
Bureau.
Thanks to my lovely friends Aditi, Joy, Swati,
Vishal, Urvashi, Nilesh, Suryakanta, Bikram and Abhijit
for supporting it morally.
I dedicate this to my nephews, Viraaj and Aaryav
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Prologue
“200...200...200...ohh...God please...God please...only
200. Yeesssssssss. Oooooooohhhh... I have got
through...”
Though I continued sitting on my comfortable chair
in front of the PC, this was probably the fastest journey
of my life. From a paid-up article of 3000 I would be an
executive earning 30,000 in one of the renowned
corporate houses. It might seem nothing, but it was the
day I was allowed to put CA before my name. The only
day in my life I was proud of myself, really proud. No
increment in my knowledge but 10 times in my pay. I
was the same Nishant before and after the results but
merely two letters before my name would make the
world of difference to my bank credits every month.
Here I am, CA Nishant Kumar Tulsiyan or Tulsi
(which my friends, though very few), call me. Just after
the end of my teenage years, I was highly inspired by my
cousin CA Manish Agarwal who being an executive,
finalize the Balance Sheet of ITC Ltd. which according
to me was the sexiest thing in the world. I was just
waiting for a huge success in becoming a CA because I
believed only a highfalutin degree could make me
acceptable. Like every other success, this one also had
many ups and downs. In a typical manner, such a case
can be described as below:
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Satyam Chowdhary
1
Part –1 _____________________________________________
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2
Inception
The story begins when I was a serious and sincere
student who used to carry all his books, a lunch box and
a plastic water bottle with well combed hair which was
practically drenched in the coconut oil. It was when I
was in the 1st year of my dream college, St. Xavier's
College, Kolkata. It took 2 years of rigorous Math and
Accounts practice to reach there. When I used to see
bundles of workbooks, I would feel responsible for
global warming.
The proud feeling of being a Xavierian can only be
realized if you are a citizen of Kolkata. There is a saying
here “only Dogs and Xavierians are found in streets at 5
am”. It is the only college here which starts at 6 am and
demands above 90% attendance from its students. We
used to take a taxi which charged Rs. 5, (carrying 6
Xavierians) to drop us to college from Howrah Station.
The rate was same throughout the 3 years of my college
life and also being a student of economics I was really
proud of our bargaining power that no inflation in oil
prices hit us. I can still remember the first day of my
college.
Though I could not sleep the entire previous night,
my mother woke me up at 4 am when the whole Howrah
was in darkness. I can still remember that spark on my
mother's face, the pride that her son would be a graduate
from Xaviers. I dressed in my usual style, a black Terri
cotton pant with blue shirt and a bag which had 5
1
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Satyam Chowdhary
3
notebooks, one for each period, and my mother, as an
icing on the cake put a red tilak on my forehead as if I
was going to the battle front. I was waiting for a missed
call from my friend PADMABHUSHAN SHETTY or
Padma on my new Nokia mobile which was gifted for
my higher secondary results.
Let me introduce my messiah, my friend
PADMABHUSHAN who really turned me around, from
a mediocre last bencher to a scholar. He did not give me
private tuition, but his words were enough to motivate a
horse that was not a favorite in the derby. I believe he
was born to do CA. Although we did our primary
schooling from St. Maria‟s Day School, we became
good friends when we were admitted in a different
secondary school together - St. Thomas Church High
School. It was only the two of us who had sought
admission in that school from the previous one. -- So, we
had no choice but to stay together. But this incident
coincidentally became the most favorable incident of my
life.
Suddenly my phone vibrated and before I could
read the name, it showed “1 missed call”. Padma‟s name
was no surprise; he was waiting near the Bangabasi
cinema hall for me. I left home, a shivering mass of
nervousness. It was the first time I was walking along
the street at 5 am. I prayed at the Shiv mandir on the
way. For the first time in my life I realized that
Chintamani Dey Road could also be shrouded in silence.
Then I saw Padma waving to me - looking as tense as
though he had just caught a glimpse of a ghost from a
Ramsay‟s movie. Bangabasi was so quiet that it would
be difficult for someone to identify it as the same street
during evenings. The silence broke when Padma said, “I
wish, we can make it in time”. We took the bus for
Howrah Station and from there we shared taxi paying
Rs. 5 each. Throughout the journey, other people in the
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4
taxi were talking about joining CA, its last date of
registration and the new scheme of examination which
was not yet confirmed. Padma and I took the front seats
and were just listening as to what they had to say. One of
them was comparing the 1st level with CAT saying,
“There will be multiple choice questions with negative
markings @ 0.25 for each wrong answer.” One of them
confirmed that pass marks would still be 50%. The other
two were worried whether calculators would be allowed
in the exams or not. Padma, being a true auditor, always
needed documentary evidences to believe something so,
he did not comment; and as usual I had nothing to say
but to brood and worry about whatever I heard. I reached
college, with a mingling of positivity and negativity.
We were allotted our roll numbers on the day of our
interview. A chart indicating our classrooms with seating
arrangements according to our roll numbers was put up
on the notice board. There was a difference of 200 in our
roll numbers and so we were prepared for sharing
different classrooms. There were three rows in each
classroom. I was glad that I was allotted the first seat of
the first bench in the middle row right in front of the
blackboard, with all chances to impress professors.
It was 5.55 already, so I just rushed to my room and
took my seat. Without any surprise the professor entered
the room sharp at 6 and began “Good morning students,
I am Mrs. Suman Ghosh, your Business management
professor.” Like every school teacher she claimed to be
different and believed in maintaining friendly relations
with her students. As it was our first lecture, she wanted
to invest some time in getting to know all the students.
To introduce ourselves we had to voice out our name,
HS percentage and aim in life. The introduction began
from the last bench. Most of the students whose chance
was before me wanted to be good Chartered Accountants
and others budding managers. I kept thinking of
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