INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION SPEECH 153
CHAPTER EIGHT ENCOURAGEMENT: ENLARGING OTHERS
WHY IS THIS CHAPTER IN THE TEXTBOOK?
OUR INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION SKILLS WILL ASSIST IN DIMINISHING OR ENLARGING OTHER PEOPLE’S ESTEEM THUS AFFECTING OUR RELATIONSHIPS
PREVIEW:
• ENLARGING OTHERS
• ACKNOWLEDGING OTHERS
• RESPECTING OTHERS
• LOOKING FOR THE BEST IN OTHERS
• COMPLEMENTING OTHERS
• SUPPORT OTHERS
• GUIDELINES FOR ENLARGING OTHERS
ENLARGING OTHERS
“EVERY TIME YOU COMMUNICATE WITH ANOTHER PERSON YOU EITHER ENLARGE OR DIMINISH THAT INDIVIDUAL BY YOUR INTERACTIONS.”
-FUJISHIN
ENLARGING OTHERS
ENLARGING OTHERS
EVERY COMMUNICATION ENLARGES OR DIMINISHES ANOTHER PERSON-YOU AFFECT ANOTHER PERSON WITH YOUR COMMUNICATION
WORDS, ACTIONS, OR ATTITUDE CAN AFFECT YOUR COMMUNICATION PARTNER
YOU CAN ENLARGE, CONFIRM, AND SUPPORT WITH ENCOURAGING WORDS
THERE ARE A VARIETY OF WAYS TO ENLARGE ANOTHER PERSON
ACKNOWLEDGING OTHERS
ACKNOWLEDGING OTHERS
1. ACKNOWLEDGE THEIR PRESENCE-”HELLO”2. ACKNOWLEDGE THE RELATIONSHIP-”I AM
GLAD TO BE FRIENDS”3. REMEMBER NAMES-REPEAT, SPELL,
VISUALIZE, MATCH, ASSOCIATE
RESPECTING OTHERS
RESPECT
ESTEEM FOR OR A SENSE OF WORTH OR EXCELLENCE FOR ANOTHER PERSON-FUJISHIN
RESPECT
VALUE UNIQUENESS VALUE EQUALITY VALUE ACCEPTANCE DESPITE DIFFERENCES EVERY HUMAN BEING IS VALUABLE AND WORTHY OF OUR
POSITIVE REGARD
RESPECTING OTHERS
• RESPECT EQUALITY (LOOK FOR THINGS THEY HAVE THAT YOU DO NOT)
• RESPECT BOUNDARIES (A LINE THAT SEPARATES WHAT IS ACCEPTABLE AND UNACCEPTABLE TO ANOTHER)
• RESPECT OPINIONS AND FEELINGS (OTHERS SHOULD FEEL SAFE AROUND YOU EXPRESSING FEELINGS)
LOOKING FOR THE BEST IN OTHERS
WHAT DOES FUJISHIN MEAN BY THE 80/20 RULE?
AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT, 80 PERCENT OF YOUR LIFE IS WORKING AND 20 PERCENT IS NOT.
LOOK FOR AND APPRECIATE THE 80 PERCENT OF GOOD IN OTHERS
LOOKING FOR THE BEST IN OTHERS
• THE 80/20 RULE• WILL VARY WITH LEVEL OF
INTIMACY IN RELATIONSHIP• TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS
SAYING THE BEST T0 OTHERS
COMPLIMENT OTHERS
APPEARANCE (SMILE) ACHIEVEMENT CHARACTER (TENDS TO LAST) EFFORT THINGS NOT DONE THAT ARE WORTHY OF
PRAISE (INTERRUPT, MOPE)
REFRAMING NEGATIVES
REFRAMING NEGATIVES
REFRAME A NEGATIVE PERCEPTION OF A SITUATION, CIRCUMSTANCE, OR PERSON INTO A POSITIVE-FUJISHIN
• BEING FIRED• HAVING AN AUTO ACCIDENT• BREAKING UP A RELATIONSHIP
SUPPORTING OTHERS
VERBAL SUPPORT
ANY STATEMENT THAT PROVIDES COMFORT, ENCOURAGEMENT, OR
CONFIRMATION-FUJISHIN
PHYSICAL SUPPORT
ANY ACT THAT OR BEHAVIOR THAT ASSISTS ANOTHER PERSON IN ACCOMPLISHING A TASK-FUJISHIN
GUIDELINES FOR ENLARGING OTHERS
GUIDELINES FOR ENLARGING OTHERS
1. BE EXPRESSIVE (DO IT)2. BE SINCERE (SAY IT ONLY IF YOU BELIEVE IT)3. BE SPECIFIC (GO BEYOND “GOOD”-EXPLAIN)4. BE LIMITED (USE WHEN APPROPRIATE)5. BE ALTRUISTIC (WITHOUT EXPECTING
ANYTHING IN RETURN)6. BE PERSISTENT (DO NOT EXPECT IMMEDIATE
CHANGES IN RELATIONSHIPS
SUMMARY:
• ENLARGING OTHERS
• ACKNOWLEDGING OTHERS
• RESPECTING OTHERS
• LOOKING FOR THE BEST IN OTHERS
• COMPLEMENTING OTHERS
• SUPPORT OTHERS
• GUIDELINES FOR ENLARGING OTHERS