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Explain the main differences between communicating
with adults and communicating with children and
young people
Mostly, the way that we communicate with adults and with children will be similar if
not the same. Maintaining positive and interested body language is important to both
groups because it shows genuine interest in what they are saying, and the same can
be said for maintaining eye contact and other non-verbal communication that conveys
attentiveness and interest.
Treating everyone, adult or child, with courtesy and respect, especially when in a
professional situation, is crucial, even if their views are different or incompatible with
yours, and it is equally important to talk to both groups using language they
understand. Talking teacher-jargon to parents is possible, but if the parents' level of
education is not very high, or if they have learning difficulties themselves, it is unfair
and counterproductive to use words they are not familiar with.
It is also important to talk to both adults and children using positive non-verbal
communication to back up positive verbal communication. Body language should
always deliver the same underlying information that speech sends, or the mismatch
can confuse the listener.
Active listening with both groups is also important, especially because it conveys
interest and respect, but also because it helps to get more out of the conversation,
and this can benefit both you and the person you are talking to, child or adult.
Assumptions should always be avoided in conversation with either children or adults.
Children may not be so sensitive to assumptions; for example, expecting an Asian girl
to be Muslim and to only eat a halal diet may not bother the child, even though she is
actually mixed race and has no experience of religion. The little girl may not even
notice your assumptions, but when her mother, who is white, comes to a parents'
evening, she might. How that mother might react to your assumptions may not be
easily predictable, and the expectation of what she might be like could be damaging
to your relationship with the family going forward.
Additionally, assumptions about how much someone knows or understands should
be avoided. Because of your role as teaching and learning support, you cannot
assume that all the children understand what you mean by something. The same
goes for when you communicate with their parents. Making a habit of checking
understanding can be beneficial for all parties, including yourself.
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Aspects of communicating.
Additional aspects of communicating with adults
You are likely to use a variety of forms of communication with adults, such as written
emails and letters, notices and other signs. These should be written with
professionalism, and you should also be aware that different people need more or
less detail depending on what their role is; professionals may need specific
information, while parents may simply need a request for them to call into the school
to discuss something.
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Additionally, when writing to parents, you should be aware of any sensory
communication barriers they might have; for example, if a child's mother is sight-
impaired, she might not be able to easily read a letter sent home with her daughter.
There may be other very personal reasons why she hasn't read the letter, so if you
need to ask a parent or carer why they haven't responded to a letter, you should not
make assumptions about them; asking in a sensitive way may assist the situation
and prevent it from escalating unnecessarily.
You should always maintain a professional attitude and outlook when communicating
with adults, and especially with professionals.
Additional aspects of communicating with children
The language you use when talking to children should be age-appropriate. There are
some things that simply cannot and should not be said to children, and they are often
more aware than you might expect when an adult uses inappropriate language.
As well as talking to children at the level they can understand, you should adapt your
communication itself to their level of understanding. For example, a nod of the head
may denote a 'yes' response for some children and adults, but if an autistic child is
talking to you, the nod may go unnoticed.
Because children are still learning to communicate effectively, any communication
can be treated as a teaching moment if appropriate. You can be more proactive
about rechecking and encouraging their clear communication, by paraphrasing,
repeating, and other active listening techniques.
An important part of active listening is in ensuring clarity of communication, because
children often do not make themselves clear enough to be understood
unambiguously, and sometimes if they don't understand what you have said, they
won't say so without prompting. If you double-check their understanding by asking
them to repeat back to you what you have said, you can establish if you have been
clear enough; and the same goes for things they say; as mentioned earlier in the unit,
paraphrasing what they have said is good practice to help ensure clarity.
As with adults, your communication with children must convey at all times a
professional relationship. One aspect of this means that physical contact should not
be encouraged when communicating. Very young children, when they trust an adult
and become more attached to that adult do often offer hugs and hand holding or
similar, and it wouldn't be fair to confuse them by telling them not to. However,
physical contact with children under any circumstances should not be offered, and
you should not be otherwise physical with them at all, in any way.
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