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CONVERSATIONAL SKILLS
ESSENTIALS OF GOODCONVERSATION
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WHAT IS COMMUNICATION ?
Communication is the interchangeof ideas, thoughts, opinions orinformation by signs, speech or
writing. It is also an exchange offeelings and attitudes.
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EFFECTIVE
COMMUNICATIONENSURES
Better understanding of the
other persons needs andwants
Less ill feeling
Better human relations inany setting
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COMMUNICATION PROCESS
It is a two-way processand not an isolatedaction
It is a Chain of Eventsbetween the Sender &Receiver where themessage is sent across.
There is a Responsefrom Receiver throughconstant feedback
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Verbal communication
The spoken word can be:
Irresistible to me but irritating to you Easily uttered but less easily forgiven or
forgotten
Simple yet subtle in meaning Frequently abused and confused
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Vocal Communication consists of :
PITCH
TONE
VOLUMEPACE
INFLECTION
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Conversational skills
Good conversational skills requiremore than:
Good grammar and vocabulary Effective use of pitch, tone, volume, pace,
inflection
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Purposes of conversation
Pleasure of self expression
and interaction with other
people.
To get to know the other
person better
To build trust and credibilitybetween people
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The art of good conversation
Doesnt mean:
To speak in an interesting and arresting fashion To be noted for your humor
Your ability to tell stories
Your general knowledge of a variety of subjects
That you should dominate, control or always be
right
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The art of good conversation
Centers on:
Your ability to ask questions and to listen
attentively to the answers
Not monopolizing the conversation
Never doing or saying anything that could hurt or
offend
Making the interaction enjoyable The 3Cs: caring, courtesy, consideration
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The Golden Rule
Treat other people the way you would likethem to treat you.
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CONVERSATION FLOW
Greeting
Opening
Listening
Getting facts right/Paraphrasing
Questioning/Seeking clarification
Reaching a decision/Agreement Closing
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Greeting Friends and GreetingStrangers
Friends
Greeting:
How are you? Fine, thanks. Im verywell.
Conversation starters:
How are things? Not too bad.
Hows it going? Great.
Lovely weather! Yes, it is.
Hows work? Ok/Fine/Not too bad.
I havent seen you No, Ive been busy/away.
for a while.
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Meeting friends
Conversation closers:
See you soon/later. Goodbye/Bye.I must be going. See you soon.
Ill be in touch. Bye for now.
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Greeting strangers
Introduction
May/Can I introduce myself/my Nice to meetcolleague you.
Greeting
How do you do? * How do you do?
Pleased to meet you. Glad to meet you too.
*common English greeting when you meet someone for thefirst time and is generally accompanied with a firmhandshake.
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Meeting strangers
Conversation starters
Have you been here long? No, Ive just arrived.
Have you been here before? No, this is my first visit.
Lovely weather. Yes, marvelous, isnt it?
Conversation closers
(Im) glad/pleased to have (Its) nice to have met
met you. you too.
Its been very interesting If youre ever intalking to you. ______, you mustget in touch.
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ARE YOU LISTENING ?
HEARING is passive : it is a physiological
process whereby auditory impressions arereceived by your ears and transmitted to your
brain.
LISTENING is active. It is an activity that
involves interpreting and understanding the
significance of the sensory or hearing
experience.
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Empathetic Listening
Listen to understand rather than to reply.
Seek first to understand, then to be
understood. Putting yourself in the other persons shoes
seeing things from the speakers point of view.
Use positive body language to show listening.
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How to show youre listening
Purpose Appropriate Phrase
To show concern Oh, really?
To show disbelief No way! I cantbelieve this! Youre
joking!
To congratulate Great! Glad to hear it!
Congratulations!Goodfor you!
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How to show youre listening
Purpose Appropriate Phrase
To admire Beautiful, Wonderful,
Great
To agree Sure, Right, Yes
To encourage Go on, And, Then?
To show attention I see, All right, Mm
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Keys to Effective Listening
Stop Talking ! You cant listen if youretalking
Put the speaker at ease (nod, smile,make eye contact, agree with theperson)
Be attentive - show that you want to
listen (lean slightly forward, face theperson directly)
Remove distractions
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Keys to Effective Listening
Be patient. Dont rush, dont interrupt.
Ask questions for clarification.
Dont argue. That only puts the speaker onthe defensive.
Paraphrase the speakers words. Thisshows that you are genuinely payingattention.
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Courtesy and politeness
while asking questions
Avoid asking questions that begin with
why Be aware of your vocal tone when asking
questions
Use phrases like please and thank you
May rather than Can
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Be a Good Conversationalist
Maintain eye contact.
Listen to others; do not interrupt or finishanother's statement.
Be well informed; be able to talk on a wide rangeof subjects.
Stay informed on the major news happenings ofthe world.
Do not pretend to be an expert on topics that
you are not. Be able to flow from one topic to another with
ease.
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Be a Good Conversationalist
Be interested in what other people do for aliving.
Do not correct another's grammar orpronunciation in public.
Gracefully accept any compliments given to you.
If you are extending a compliment; always besincere.
Be sure to converse with everyone within the
group. Be sensitive to a shy person within the group.
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Be a Good Conversationalist
Keep the conversation flowing, try to avoid an awkwardsilence.
Be diplomatic in situations where you are too busy tocarry on a conversation. (I would really like to continue
this conversation, but I have to go/do/meet right now.Could we meet again later?)
Do not ask a professional for advice or information at asocial function or casual meeting.
Topics to keep away from:
Health or illness Sensitive topics (salary, sex, religion, marital status,etc.)
Gossip
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