Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30721
Rich McLaughlinMcLaughlin Consulting Services
Emotional Intelligence Primer
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30722
“Organizations where ego is poorly managed, then have to attract talent primarily by pay, missing the opportunity to attract talent by the opportunities for growth the company provides or the desire people have to work there. The ripple effect is that companies become less competitive and are marginalized by the lack of talent.”
David Marcum
Opening Thought
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30723
Opening Thought
~ Daniel Goleman, Harvard
“The best bosses are people who are trustworthy, empathic, and connected, who make us feel calm, appreciated and inspired. People who feel their boss provides a secure base, are more free to explore, be playful, take risks, innovate and take on new challenges. And if leaders establish such trust and safety, then when they give tough feedback, the person receiving it not only stays more open but sees benefit in getting even hard to take information.”
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30724
Emotional Intelligence
• Self Awareness
• Managing your emotions
• Motivating oneself
• Recognizing emotions in others
• Social Skills
You
Others
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30725
Emotional Intelligence
Spinal cord enters brain here
LimbicSystem
(I feel here)
I ThinkRationally
(way over here)
“Since our brains are wired to make us emotional creatures, your first reaction to an event is always going to be an emotional one.”
~ T. Bradberry and J. Greaves, Emotional Intelligence 2.0
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30726
Rich shuts down
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30727
Known to me
Unknown to me
Known by others Unknown by others
Seek Feedback
Build trust or..
Public Self
HiddenPotential
BlindSpot
Private Self
Self-Awareness – Johari Window
have them make it up!
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30728
Seeking Feedback1) Make a live appeal – “Could really use your help here..”
2) Have trusted person send out survey• What is ________doing that you appreciate and want _____to CONTINUE to do?• What would you like ______to STOP doing/do less of?• What would you like ___________ to START doing/do more of?
3) Review data and
4) Thank them and ask if they would come to a clarification meeting facilitated by X
5) Attend and listen and make agreements there or sleep on it and get back to them
do NOT put an action plan together
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-30729
Emotional Intelligence
Known to me
Unknown to me
Known by others Unknown by others
Seek Feedback
Build trust or..
Public Self
HiddenPotential
BlindSpot
Private Self
have them make it up!
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-307210
How Personal?
1) On a scale of 1-10 how personal does it feel here?“1”
People are hesitant to
share anything personal here/
Myself included
“10” People here
know and care about each other and are unafraid to share what’s
going on for them
2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
2) How personal would I like it to be?
2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
1
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-307211
Social Awareness
Self Awareness
Managing your emotions
Motivating oneself
Recognizing emotions in others
Social Skills
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-307212
High
Low
• Energy Required
Ignoring
Pretend Listening
Selective Listening
Attentive Listening
Empathy
• Relationship Built
Sympathy
Empathy vs. Sympathy
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-307213
Emotional Intelligence
“A critical task of leadership is to protect space for the expression of people’s doubts. The act of surfacing doubts and dissent does not deflect the communal intention to create something new. What is critical, and hard to live with, is that leaders do not have to respond to each person’s doubts. All we have to do with the doubts of others is get interested in them. We do not have to take them on or let them resonate with our own doubts.”
~ Peter Block
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-307214
Emotional Intelligence
To what degree is it ok to express doubts here?
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-307215
Emotional Intelligence
1. Be aware of your emotions and ask for help to manage them
2. Ask for feedback periodically
3. Look for opportunities to “let others in” and be vulnerable
4. Choose empathy/avoid sympathy
5. Encourage airing of doubts without judgement
Helping Leaders drive change and innovation!
McLaughlin Consulting Services [email protected]
609-577-307216
"All businesses have one thing in common. They are made up of people. If you treat your people correctly, the business should operate more smoothly. This is true of all businesses, manufacturing and service alike, but it is particularly true of service industries, for human beings are the most critical element.
Andy LawFounder, St. Luke’sAdvertising Agency
Closing Thoughts
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