Agenda
• The problem of bullying• Social skills for all young people• If your child is being bullied• If your child is bullying others• What else you can do
What is bullying?
It’s
with lesshurting someoneand
repeatedlypurposely
power.
What’s the difference?
Bullying vs.
having a conflict
Bullying is EVERYONE’S problem.
The good news:
• Teach empathy.• Boost self-esteem.• Promote respect
and nonviolence.
You can do something about it.
FACT: It’s violence.FACT: It has lasting effects.FACT: It’s common.
Bullying is just part of being a kid.
• academic problems• social isolation• mental health problems
Being bullied toughens children up.FACT: Being bullied can cause:
Being a bully has long-term consequences, too.
Bullies are at higher risk for:• academic problems• social isolation• violence and crime
All bullying is physical.
FACT: Bullying can also be:
• indirect (relational)
• verbal
For the bully, it’s all about
Any child can be bullied.• provocative targets• passive targets
The power of bystanders
The silent majority
• Bullies target “weaker” children to feel more powerful.
• Bullying has long-term consequences for everyone.
• Bullies, targets and bystanders all play a role in bullying.
Check in
Social skills—the foundation for preventing bullying• Make your values clear.• Walk the walk.
Empathy
• prevents bullying behavior• makes bullying
unacceptable
Tips for teaching your child empathy
• Respect your child’s feelings.
• Talk about yours.
Putting empathy into action: all people deserve respect.
• Be a role model.• Foster an open mind.• Make your expectations clear.
Assertiveness
• standing up for yourself
• respecting the rights of others
• “I” message: I (feel this way) when (this happens). I need (this to happen).
• “You” message:YOU thief! I can’t believe YOU took my book without asking me. If YOU do it again, YOU’LL be sorry.”
Assertive-speak
Assertive body language
• Stand tall.
• Make eye contact.
• Speak firmly.
Managing emotions
Strategies for managing anger
• Recognize it.
• Calm down.
• Find healthy emotional outlets.
Resolving conflicts…PEACEFULLY
Challenge media messages.• Watch together.• Set limits. • Talk about it.
• Model empathy and respect.
• Teach assertiveness, anger management and conflict resolution skills.
Check in
If your child is being bullied
No news isn’t always good news.
Don’t wait for your child to come to you.
• changes in behavior• avoiding school• drop in grades• missing belongings• headaches and stomachaches
What would you do?
• Take it seriously. • Empower
your child. • Report it.
Two common responses to bullying—and why they don’t work.
• “Just ignore it.” • “Fight back!”
Helpful advice for your child
• Stay calm.
• Be assertive.
• Get help.
Staying calm and confident
• visualization• looking confident
• self-talk
Defusing a bully
• Agree with the facts. • Make a joke.• Reframe it.
Which is assertive?
“Stop it! You’re hurting my feelings!”
b. “I don’t like you calling me names. I want you to stop now.”
a.
Safety first
• Avoid the bully until the conflict gets resolved.
• Think safety in numbers.
• Get away and get help.
Practice makes perfect.
• Role play.
• Practice decision making.
Boost your child’s self-esteem.
• Emphasize the positive.
• Encourage your child.
Friendship is the best protection.
Help your child:
• overcome shyness
• improve social skills.
• join in
Check in
• Be there for your child.• Teach assertive responses
to bullying.• Help your child build self-
esteem and make friends.
If your child is bullying
Many parents feel:
• angry • defensive.
Be firm but loving with your child.
• Set clear limits.
• Be consistent.
• Be loving.
Getting to the root of the problem
• Is my child getting enough supervision?
• Do family members “bully” each other?
• Is there stress at home?
Talk to your child—and really listen.
You can start to turn things around.
• Spend more time together.
• Model positive social skills.
Give positive alternatives.
• Encourage healthy interests.
• Turn strength into leadership.
• Get connected to the community.
Know when to seek help.
• Focus on helping your child.
• Teach and reward positive behavior.
• Seek help.
Check in
What else can I do?
• Support school efforts.
• Raise awareness.
• Support after-school programs.• Be a role model.
Do you have any questions?Do you have any questions?
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