By Vince CiottiH.I.S. (not very) Professionals, LLC
At the risk of antagonizing the many HIS vendor CEOs who have been so helpful in writing my HIS-tory series of their firms over the past year, this week features another special episode for the Christmas season.
To make this holiday a little merrier (and with a little inside help from the NSA), we managed to get copies of the leading HIS vendor executives’ private letters to Santa.
So sit back in your office chair, warm up your egg nog (or that stale office coffee), and enjoy these somewhat “punny” missives meant to poke a little fun at the bosses of our top 13 HIS vendors, listed by order of revenue. Hope Yule like it!
(PS - our attorney can be reached at: 800/555-1212)
Dear Santa,
To make this season a
Paragon of Christmases, I would like
to see a whole Series of Stars spread
across the Horizon.
Sincerely,
John Hammergren
Dear Mr. Claus,
To make my day this Xmas, I’d
like another epic sale the size of
IHC...
Yours truly,
Neal Patterson
Dear Santa,
For this Christmas, I’d sure
be interested my old job back at
Partners, in case you run across
anybody there in your travels...
Sincerely,
John Glaser
Dear Santa,
This Christmas, I really don’t
need anything... but thanks for
asking!
Yours truly,
Judy
Santa,
Since we are based in
Chicago, the biggest help you could
be is to get those Bulls to start
beating the Bears! (on Wall Street,
that is…)
Sincerely,
Paul Black
Dear Mr. Claus,
Could you please help us find
a buyer for our BDM Pharmacy
Division? (…what? Oh…)
Sorry, never mind.
Sincerely,
Jan DeWitt
Santa,
This year, I’d like a Magic wand
so all of our Clients can be Served
on a single Release (6).
Yours,
Neal Pappalardo
Dear Santa,
All I want for Christmas is that our
next Opus encompasses the whole
Sphere of our ambulatory systems.
Sincerely yours,
Steve Plochoki
Santer,
All we’d really like this yeah is to
sell our system to just one really big
hospital for a change – say, one
that’s over 100 beds. Oh awright,
howabout one over 25 beds?
Y’all have a merry one!
Boyd Douglas
Dear Santa,
We’d really appreciate it if you
could make that other “HMS” in New
York change their initials.
Many thanks,
Tom Stevenson
親愛なるサンタ、
あなたは、米国の前に、今年東京で停止を確認してください、
ありがとうございました
Dear Mr. Claus,
Can you please find us some nice office
space in Reston, Virginia, that is located on a
street that is named something besides
“Sunset?” You see, we really have this Affinity
for making Quantim leaps forward…
Many thanks,
Jeff Bender
Dear Santa,
As you may know, I just moved here from
McKesson down in Atlanta. The people up here
in Minnesota are wonderful but the weather is
just dreadful. Could you possibly back off the
snow for few weeks this summer?
Many thanks,
Chris Bauleke
Dear Santa,
Please have Vince stop sending me any more of
these silly episodes next year – they are costing me too
many sponsors. In return, I promise I will start being a
very good boy.
Fondest regards to you and Mrs. Claus,
Yours truly,
Mr. HIStalk
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