Zombies, Vampires, and Babies: What You NEED to Know!

Presented by Joseph Labrecque at Ignite Denver 9

@JosephLabrecque

I Am an Expert

Studied the undead in high school.

Have experienced the visceral horror of babies, twice.

I’m a published author. So you

know my word is legit.

Zombies! Revenants!

A revenant is an animated corpse that is believed to return from the grave to

terrorize the living.

Hold up… Revenants?

Zombies == a mob due to a widespread virus or plague.

That just doesn’t represent

reality.

Vampires!

Vampires are beings who subsist by feeding on the life essence of living creatures, regardless of whether they

are undead or a living person.

Babies!

An infant or baby is the very young offspring of humans.

Shared Characteristics

All are technically human in one way or another.

All survive by drinking fluid from human beings.

All are often blamed for spreading disease.

They all bite.

Revenants and Vampires

Both were, at one time, babies!!!

Revenants and Babies

Communicate through a series of moans and cries.

Slow moving, crawling, grasping.

Vampires and Babies

Employ ‘hypnosis’ to gain trust with victims.

Neither can cross moving

water.

How to protect oneself?

Read the literature!

Be aware of sleeping patterns.

Know local “hotspots”.

Graveyard. Abandoned Church.

Daycare.

Employ exorcism rituals.

Decapitation and destruction of the heart.

(Generally illegal. Especially

with babies.)

The Greatest Danger?

Babies.

Let’s make this clear: babies.

Last Thoughts…

"No one will ever know whether children are monsters or monsters are children."

- Henry James

@JosephLabrecque