You’re Ok—I’m Ok! Interpersonal Differences

Here is the WIIFM!

Story Time!

You will be rich, you will be poor. You will be happy and sad. Everything in this world will happen to you. The only thing you have control over is your “ATTITUDE”!

-George Burns

Question is –Do you want to change?

Change is hard!

•Developed early in childhood.

•Learned behavior.

•Environment plays a role.

•These may be hereditary.

We all have certain preferences for dealing with “life” and other people!

You Have a Preference!

•When dealing with conflict………..

•When communicating……………….

•When celebrating……………………..

•When listening………………………….

•When dealing with stress…………..

•When studying………………………….

•When learning and teaching……….

We use certain preferred types of energy to solve problems, organize our lives and relate to others.

Not everyone uses the same type of “energy” in each situation, but each of us have been born with or learned to favor certain kinds of energy over others.

As we age, these preferences change—due to action and outcome.

Rustout Stress Burnout

Teaching those who are different from us can cause us a great deal of interpersonal

stress!

Grounding vs. Creative

We all have a preference for the way we take information in….

•Steady

•Reliable and dependable

•Do one thing at a time.

•Get information from sight, sound, touch and taste.

•Focused on the “here” and the “now”.

•Organized.

•Get the work done.

Grounding

High Grounding Children –

•Study habits

•Communication & listening

•Classroom behavior

•Motivations

•Stressors

•Future focused - Visionary.

•Multi-task.

•Bore easily.

•“Go with the flow” attitude.

•What if, Why not?

•Dislike “status quo”.

•Great problem-solvers.

•Work “outside of the box”.

•Make decisions based on intuition.

Creative

High Creative Children –•Study habits

•Communication & listening

•Classroom behavior

•Motivations

•Stressors

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF MANY YEARS.

High Grounding

High Creative

Logic vs. Relationship

We all have a preference for the way we process information.

Logic•If “A”, then “B”.•Quantitative •Thinker•Likes data, statistics, numbers and graphs. •Focuses on the “past”. •The more details—the better. •Sort and test to determine what is next. •Set goals and measure progress.•Often, perceived as “cold” and insensitive.

High Logic Children – •Study habits

•Communication & listening

•Classroom behavior

•Motivations

•Stressors

Relationship•Makes decisions based on emotions. •“In touch” with their feelings. •Sensitive to others. •Often perceived as “people-person”. •Doesn’t know how to say “no”. •Guilt based decision making. •Time is circular. •Outgoing, humorous, and friendly. •It is about “likes and dislikes”.

High Relationship Children – •Study habits

•Communication & listening

•Classroom behavior

•Motivations

•Stressors

High Logic

High Relationship

There is a natural tendency to feel comfortable and to get along with children who are the same energy type as we are.

Conflict often comes into play when we must interact with others who either see the world differently than we do, or who interpret events in different ways.

•If you want to communicate with someone who is using a different dominant energy, try speaking their language.

•You can minimize unnecessary stress for others by consciously considering how you are perceived by others of a different energy type.

•Value and appreciate the contribution of each energy type. The world is made up of teams, with each person playing an important and different role.

Remember Jessie? –

Question:

What could you do to enhance Jessie’s learning environment and increase your effectiveness as a teacher/counselor?

•Have we assembled children with the right “profiles” to get the work done well?

•Are we providing a climate that appreciates and utilizes each child’s unique contribution?

•Is everyone clear about his or her role?

•Are we awarding and praising the children in a manner which supports their preference?

•Are we delivering class content in a variety of different modes?

Grounding

Cre

ativ

e

Relationship

Log

ic

High Relationship Child wants to please you.

High Logic Child wants proof that can stand the test of “why”?

High Grounding Child wants the details and the step-by-step to doing it.

High Creative Child stares out the window and wonders “when am I going to need this?”

Story Time!