Why i loved, loathed and learned from facebook

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Love, Loathe And Learn Why I Loved, Then Loathed And Finally Learned From Facebook a real story

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Transcript of Why i loved, loathed and learned from facebook

Page 1: Why i loved, loathed and learned from facebook

Love, Loathe And Learn Why I Loved, Then Loathed And Finally Learned From Facebook

a real story

Page 2: Why i loved, loathed and learned from facebook

First I loved Facebook

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I reveled in the attention,

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and was engrossed in the gossips.

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I used to enjoy seeing what others did or posting what I did,

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You may call it stalking

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or may be the love of self.

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Yes, I loved my BIG ego.

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I could say many things that I couldn’t say on their face and

yet go scot free…

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I was ‘connected’ without really needing to meet or waste time.

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I loved those surreal experiences and

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was thrilled with my second world

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I admired my own posts to no end,

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and cherished the persona that I created for myself

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Subtly but surely, Facebook became THE only reality.

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I was addicted, and I would not admit.

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My Facebook image larger than the real me and those shoes

hard to fill

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In real world and when I met real people, a false sense of familiarity overpowered the

distance

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Now, I started loathing myself

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I saw that people’s opinions about ‘me’ was not about me

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I imagined that they saw ‘me’ as a time waster

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Even though I compromised 4+ hours of sleep each day

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They saw ‘me’ as jobless jack, or so I assumed.

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They were probably calling me an egotist,

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And I was getting increasingly uncomfortable with such

notions

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I was getting distant with myself, unable to accept that

reality

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Many a time, I saw them as intruding into my private life

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At other times, I suspected that they were nonchalant

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I felt terrible when people did not ‘like’ my banal posts

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I felt let down just because 299 ‘friends’ wished on birthday.

(I have all of 943 friends)

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I started disliking their views and vice versa

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I started reading too much into what they were posting

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I made foes out of friends more because

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I suspected that they knew me more than they should about

me.

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I started getting confused with my innate introversion and

supposed exuberant extroversion.

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There were conflicts with ‘me’ and me

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My many roles merged into one completely and a confused

personality for all to see

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I experienced incompleteness as everybody seemed to be

doing awesome while my life seemed awful

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Dreadful, hideous, repulsive, vile and upsetting to say the

least

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When I have nothing to write that day, I felt melancholic

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No ‘like’ in 4 hours was a misery, just as the wait for the next like or next comment was

excruciating

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Sleepless nights and sleeping pills wouldn't work

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I snapped, slapped myself awake

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And took a short Facebook Sabbath. I deactivated

Facebook

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And deleted the app from my phone and the iPad.

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I started running sea ward and ran long distances, alone

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Meditated by the beach, Rollerbladed on sidewalks

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Prayed and started to discover the new ‘me’

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That was in sync with me

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And hence learned a few lessons

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Facebook in itself was not bad. It was my own addiction

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It was not how others saw me. It was how I thought they saw me.

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They did not ignore me. They had placed importance to

themselves.

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Not that they didn’t ‘like’ me, they just took care of themselves.

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The real world, real people were intact with their pristine goodness.

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There still existed real meetings, real friends.

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Online did not erase off-line identity. They coexisted.

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There was a lot to learn and a lot more to unlearn.

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So this is what I did

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I slashed my friends’ list. All those not regularly adding value or making make

me laugh had to go - unfollow or hidden.

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I set a max limits on people. Less people, less content, less gossip, more time

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I found a good reader app I use Flipboard to consolidate news and browse

once a day for just 20 min.

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I time boxed my online presence. I check Facebook only during breakfast, taxis or if I am

waiting for some one.

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I minimized the number devices Now my devices now serve specific functions

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I deleted my phone app Just the way we remove junk food from the fridge

to stick to a diet.

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I turned to reliable content sources I followed useful content from professionals only on

twitter, LinkedIn and tech blogs.

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I use apps like Klout and Buffer to schedule sharing

and wolfram alpha , retweet lab tell me on the good times to post.

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The results are telling

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I’ve found myself refreshed, focused, and energetic.

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I re-discovered the beauty of the world beyond inbox,

newsfeeds and comments.

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I was easy to love and loathe, it was arduous to step back,

breathe in and to look at one self in the mirror.

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And the journey continues… #LifeIsOn #FullVolume

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Love, Loathe And Learn Why I Loved, Then Loathed And Finally Learned From Facebook

Page 74: Why i loved, loathed and learned from facebook

By a President aspirant, amateur author, doting dad, experimental entrepreneur, passionate photographer, social media evangelist, tireless

traveler, happenstance humanoid - Rajesh Soundararajan | @rajeshsound