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Teacher’s Guide

TM

What’s a Bully?Grades 3-5

9899

Executive ProducerSusan Eikov Green

Video ProductionMazzarella Bros. Productions

Bristol, CT

WriterCassandra Morris

Teacher’s GuideRuth Grossman

© 2005 Sunburst Visual Media, a division of Global Video, LLC

ISBN 1-59520-669-8

What’s a Bully?

Credits

About the ProgramWhy Should Students View This Program? ................................................ 3Learning Objectives .................................................................................... 3Program Content ......................................................................................... 4Pre-Viewing Questions ................................................................................ 4

Program Summary ......................................................................................... 5

Guidelines for Discussion ............................................................................... 8

Discussion Questions ..................................................................................... 9

Bulletin Board Starters ................................................................................... 11

Suggested Activities ...................................................................................... 12

Send-Home Page ........................................................................................... 14

Take-Home Book ........................................................................................... 15

Activity Sheets Table of Contents ........................................................................................ 16Part 1: The Tough Guy ............................................................................... 17Part 2: Words Can Hurt, Too ....................................................................... 21Part 3: You Know What I Heard? ................................................................ 24Part 4: The Internet Bully ........................................................................... 27

Suggested ReadingReading for Educators and Parents ............................................................. 31Reading for Grades 3-5 .............................................................................. 32Internet Resources ...................................................................................... 35Related Materials from Sunburst Visual Media .......................................... 36

Script ........................................................................................................... 37

program running time: approximately 18 minutes

We highly recommend that teachers preview programs before showing them in the classroom.

What’s a Bully?

Table of Contents

Why Should Students View This Program?Bullying happens in elementary school more often than most people think.

Youngsters may pick on or tease their schoolmates, spread rumors or gossip, or in

a new type of harassment less obvious to teachers and parents, hide behind the

anonymity of the Internet to send intimidating messages to their victims. What

may surprise adults even more than the bullying actions, is the fact that many of

the youngsters who engage in these behaviors do not think of themselves as bullies.

Instead, they excuse their actions by saying that they are “only fooling around,”

“having fun,” or “just joking.”

Starting from the premise that you can't tell if someone is a bully just by looking at

them, What's a Bully? makes clear to viewers that bullies come in all shapes,

sizes and genders. And more importantly, all bullies don't act the same way. Some

bullies attack with their fists, some use words, some spread rumors and gossip, and

today others do their damage online. And, the program points out, more often than

not the kids who engage in these behaviors usually don't think of themselves as

bullies; they certainly don't consider about how their words and actions may affect

their targets. Using situations that middle-elementary students will readily recog-

nize, the program dramatizes different examples of bullying behavior: physical

bullying, teasing with putdowns and taunts, spreading rumors, and harassing with

threats and insults over the Internet. The program concludes by urging viewers to

examine and think about their own behavior. The best way to see if what you do

could be considered bullying, the program advises, is to ask yourself, “How would

I like it if someone did this to me?”

Learning ObjectivesThis program is designed to help middle-elementary children:

• learn that bullies come in all shapes and sizes, and can be either

boys or girls.

• understand that not all bullies see their behavior as bullying.

• become aware of the different ways bullying may take place.

• examine their own behavior to discover whether it might be considered

bullying.

What’s a Bully?3

About the Program

• identify certain kinds of words or actions as bullying.

• understand the effects bullying has on others.

• decide to ask themselves before they act, “Would I like it if someone

did this to me?”

Program ContentWith a young host introducing each segment, the program helps viewers understand that

many different kinds of behavior can be seen as bullying: the boy who picks on others to

impress his friends, the girl who uses taunts and putdowns to hurt another girl, the boy

who spreads a rumor because he's jealous of another boy's popularity, and the girls who

hide behind the anonymity of the Internet to harass another girl. Making clear that these

are all bullying behaviors, the program encourages students to think about and examine

their own behavior and then ask themselves, “Could what I'm doing be considered bully-

ing? Would I like it if someone did this to me?”

Pre-Viewing Questions• Is there a single definition of a bully? Why or why not?

• Do only boys bully? What about girls and bullying behavior?

• What kinds of behavior could be considered bullying?

What’s a Bully?4

As a series of shots of middle-elementary school kids rolls across the screen, the

young host asks if viewers can pick out which one might be a bully. The truth is, she

explains, just looking at someone can't tell you. Bullies come in all shapes and sizes,

she adds, both boys and girls. What's more, she goes on, they don't all act the same.

This program, she tells viewers, helps you recognize bullying behavior and what a

bully is.

Part One: The Tough GuyNotes the host, people usually think of a bully as a tough guy. Jack fills this bill. He

thinks that by picking on someone and embarrassing them, the other kids will think

he's cool. In the locker room getting ready for basketball practice, he makes Kenny his

target. First he compliments him on his sneakers, then grabs one and pretends to drib-

ble it. Passing it back and forth to Sam, his final shot lands the sneaker in the toilet

bowl. On Jack's prompting, the other kids laugh and call him, “Cool.”

At lunchtime in the cafeteria, Jack finds another target: Billy, whose cupcakes he

smashes. He laughs and the kids sitting nearby laugh with him.

Jack doesn't see himself as a bully, explains the host. In fact, he sees his actions as

winning friends for himself. However, he learns otherwise when he overhears the kids

he thought were his friends making plans to go camping with Sam's parents over the

weekend, and discovers Sam's parents don't want him included. Sam tells him it's

because of his reputation as a bully. Jack hears firsthand from the kids that the actions

he considered funny and cool were really bullying. Questions for discussion appear

onscreen.

Part Two: Words Can Hurt, TooSome bullies, the host continues, use words to hurt and control other kids. Emma, for

example, thought she was saying funny things, but failed to think how her words

might be hurtful. At Karen's birthday party, all the kids are busy making jewelry with

block letters when Tina, who is short, pipes up to say that she can't find the “A” she

needs to complete hers.

What’s a Bully?5

Program Summary

Hearing this, Emma picks up a “Y” and tells Tina to use it instead. “It matches you

perfectly,” she says. “See T-I-N-Y…just like you.” Tina, of course, is embarrassed,

even more so because of the other girls' laughter. Later, Emma continues badgering

Tina with the name “Tiny” as Karen opens Tina's present to her, a shirt that's the right

size for Tina but too small for Karen. “It's teeny-weeny,” observes Emma, “just like

Tiny Tina.”

When Tina calls her on this, Emma asks her, “Can't you take a joke?” But it's not

funny to Tina, who dissolves in tears. Karen tells Emma that she's hurt Tina's feelings,

something Emma denies. “You're a bully,” Karen adds, as Emma suddenly realizes her

mistake. She apologizes to Tina, but the harm has been done. Name-calling and

taunts can be hurtful, says the host. So before you say something mean to someone,

she advises, ask yourself how you would feel if someone said it to you. Questions for

discussion appear onscreen.

Part Three: You Know What I Heard?Some bullies push and hit, says the host, and some hurt with words. But others, she

continues, are not so obvious. Brian is very popular at school, and prefers the situation

to stay that way. So when the class's attention turns to Charlie, a new kid in class,

Brian is very upset. All the kids are impressed that Charlie, who's from Hawaii, not

only has his own surfboard, but has been written up in a surfing magazine.

Jealous of the attention Charlie is getting, and furious as well, Brian decides to get

even. He starts a rumor that Charlie made the whole story up: Charlie's never surfed

and there's no surfing magazine, either. And as a rumor will do, the news quickly flies

around the school because no one brothers to find out whether or not it is true.

Suddenly, no one will talk to Charlie. Then he finds out from Tim that the kids think

he's a liar. So Charlie reaches into his backpack and brings out the magazine with the

article about himself. Realizing what's happened, Tim immediately tells all the other

kids that Brian is the liar. Says the host, bullies like Brian use rumors and gossip to

pick on other kids and cause trouble. The best way to stop bullies who spread rumors,

she adds, is to find out the truth by getting all the facts. Questions for discussion

appear onscreen.

Part Four: The Internet BullyAs the host points out, a new kind of bully is someone who uses the Internet to pick

on others. Telling her friend Kaylie that a kid in her older sister Allison's class got

What’s a Bully?6

weird instant messages from someone she didn't know, Morgan suggests the two of

them try doing the same thing. They decide to send “stupid stuff” to Emily without

letting her know who's sending it.

Their plan works. The first message they send is silly, and Emily has no idea where

it's coming from. But then the messages turn nasty: Emily learns that her mysterious

correspondents are going to tell everyone that she cheated on her social studies test.

Moreover, the message tells her, not only does she always cheat, but no one will

want to be her friend. “You better watch out!” they warn.

The next day at school, Kaylie and Morgan learn from James that Emily's crying

and is afraid to come to school. “What are we going to do?” Kaylie anxiously asks

Morgan. Don't say anything, says Morgan; we'll talk about it after school. Later,

overhearing the two discussing it, Allison demands to know what's going on. When

they admit that what they've been doing to Emily is exactly what someone in her

class had done, Allison points out that the kids in her class who did it were suspend-

ed. Surprised to hear this, Morgan is instantly apologetic. They were only trying to

be funny, she says. So Allison asks, “Would you have thought it was funny if some-

one did it to you?” The girls agree that they would not have liked it and agree to

send Emily a message apologizing for what they did and promising not to do it

again.

Says the host, Morgan and Kaylie thought that because they couldn't see Emily and

she couldn't see them, it wasn't the same as bullying. But they are wrong, the host

explains; bullying is bullying, no matter how or where it's done. Her warning to

viewers is, if someone wants to find out where an instant message is coming from,

they can trace it back to you. Her advice is clear: “Use the Internet the right way—

don't misuse it.”

In a review, the host goes over the ways bullying can occur: it can be physical, can

hurt people through mean words, can consist of sneaky rumors and gossip, or take

place secretly on the Internet at someone else's expense. The best way to figure out

whether what you do is bullying, the host tells viewers, is to ask yourself, “How

would I like it if someone did it to me?” That's the question to ask, she adds,

because, “You don't really want to be a bully, do you?”

What’s a Bully?7

Group discussion is an invaluable way to explore ideas and issues, foster creativi-

ty, and build communication and social skills. The following guidelines can help

you maintain a “discussion-friendly” classroom:

Create a climate of openness and acceptance. Encourage students to show respect for the opinions of others and model

this behavior yourself.

Establish ground rules. Students can participate in formulating the rules for discussion. Rules will

vary, but should include some of these general principles:

- No putdowns, ridicule or sarcasm.

- Everyone may speak without interruption.

- Everyone has the right to pass.

Guard against inappropriate self-disclosure. An intense discussion may lead students to reveal inappropriate informa-

tion about themselves or others. Sensitivity and vigilance can help you

head off such revelations.

Probe behind the neat and tidy answers. Children are good at telling adults what they think adults want to hear.

To find out what students really think, it is often helpful to prolong

discussion time and encourage greater depth. Offer a “What if...?”; bring

out issues such as fairness, justice, intent or lack of it, and so on. Children

have a remarkable capacity to discern complexities and subtleties, and

their discussions can be very rich.

What’s a Bully?8

Guidelines for Discussion

Questions marked with an asterisk (*) appear on screen and in the DVD format.

Part One: The Tough Guy(1) The host tells viewers, “Bullies can be boys or girls.” Does it make a difference

in their bullying behavior? Why or why not?

(2) What are some reasons people might think of any bully as a tough guy? What

are some characteristics of a tough guy?

(3) Why do you think Jack didn't see himself as a bully?

(4*) Jack wanted his classmates to see him as “cool.” Why would he feel that his

actions would make him seem “cool”?

(5*) Why do you think the other kids laughed at Jack's bullying of Kenny and Billy?

What do you think they were really feeling?

(6) How is bullying encouraged when people stand by and laugh at the bully's

actions?

(7) Why wouldn't Sam's parents include Jack in the camping trip? Were they right

in excluding him? Why or why not?

Part Two: Words Can Hurt, Too(1) Why did Emma deny she was picking on Tina by calling her “Tiny Tina”?

(2) Why didn't Emma consider whether she was hurting Tina's feelings?

(3) Emma thought she was saying funny things. Why wouldn't they be funny to Tina?

(4*) Emma excused her bullying by saying she was “just fooling around.” Is

bullying ever a joke? Why or why not?

(5*) Why is it a good idea to think about what you're going to say before you say it?

What’s a Bully?9

Discussion Questions

Part Three: You Know What I Heard?(1) Why would the attention the kids paid to Charlie make Brian jealous?

(2) Do you think that spreading the rumor that Charlie was a liar would help Brian

become the center of attention once more? Why or why not?

(3) When you hear a rumor about something or someone, do you believe it?

Why or why not?

(4*) Is spreading a rumor the same thing as bullying? Why or why not?

(5*) Why is bullying by spreading a rumor not as obvious as other types of bullying?

(6) If you wanted to stop a rumor in its tracks, what's the best way to do it?

Part Four: The Internet Bully(1) Why did Morgan think sending “mystery” instant messages to Emily was a

good idea?

(2) What was Morgan's feeling toward Emily that made her want to send mean

messages?

(3*) Is sending anonymous instant messages ever the “harmless fun” that Morgan

says it is? Why or why not?

(4) How did the messages affect Emily? How do you think Morgan and Kaylie felt

when they learned how upset she was?

(5) Why would Morgan and Kaylie insist that what they were doing was not bully-

ing? What did they tell Allison they were doing?

(6) Morgan felt that using the Internet to send “mystery” messages was not wrong

because she couldn't see Emily and Emily couldn't see her. Do you agree?

Why or why not?

(7*) Allison tells Morgan and Kaylie, “Put yourself in the other person's place.

Think, Would I like it if someone did this to me? Discuss why this is good

advice for everyone.

What’s a Bully?10

‹ Invite students to create a four-panel cartoon story with the title, “The Tough

Guy.” Have them show how this person bullies a classmate to show how “cool”

he/she is, but gets their payback when he/she finds the other kids don't approve

of this behavior. Have students use balloon captions to move the story along.

Display the finished work on the bulletin board.

The host in the program says that the best way to figure out if what you do

could be considered bullying is to ask yourself: “Would I like it if someone did

this to me?” Invite students to create posters around this question on large

pieces of oaktag. They can use crayons, paints, or cut-out construction paper

pieces to illustrate their work. Display the completed posters on the bulletin

board.

Invite students to select either of the following two topics: gossiping or spread-

ing a rumor about someone, or scaring someone with threatening messages

over the Internet. Tell them to write a story describing why the behavior is a

form of bullying. Tell students they can write about something from their own

life, or make their story fictional. Tell them not to use real names or situations.

Display the finished stories on the bulletin board.

“I was just joking” or “I was just fooling around” are excuses children often

give for behavior they don't think of as bullying. Invite students to compose a

short poem to a fictional person who has used this excuse to show why the

words simply do not justify his/her bullying, and why an apology is in order.

Display the poems on the bulletin board.

What’s a Bully?11

Bulletin Board Starters

Language Arts; CommunicationAsk students to think about bullying and the kinds of behavior that characterize

it. Ask them to brainstorm a list of bullying behaviors that may not seem like

bullying, but are. Write each suggestion on the chalkboard. Following the

Guidelines for Discussion in this Guide, lead students in a discussion on the

behaviors listed, whether they are really bullying, and the effect each one would

have on the bully's target. Extend the discussion by reminding students that each

of the characters in the program had an excuse for why they bullied, then ask

whether any of the following statements changes anything about the bully's

behavior: “I was just fooling around,” “I was just having fun,” “Can't you take

a joke?”

Language Arts; Creative WritingAsk students to keep journals in which they reflect on the kinds of bullying

behavior they might encounter in school and out. Give them a topic to write

about each week: how it feels to be picked on; when words are used to hurt;

how rumors or gossip can be a form of bullying; why using the Internet to send

anonymous threatening messages can have devastating consequences. Make

clear that as they reflect on these behaviors, they need to examine whether they

themselves have ever engaged in one or more of them, and think about becom-

ing more aware of their own actions. If students wish, they can read selections

from their journal to the rest of the class.

Language Arts; Creative ExpressionAsk students what they know about rumors and how they get started. Do they

know how rumors can be stopped? Invite students to get together with two or

three partners and write a short play about rumors: the way they fly from person

to person, why they should be considered a form of bullying, and how they can

get stopped. Have each group perform their play for their classmates.

Language Arts; ReadingAlmost every book with a school setting has a bully in it, as do many books

about children's neighborhoods and friendships. Ask students to select and read

What’s a Bully?12

Suggested Activities

one of the books of fiction in the Suggested Reading section of this Guide, or

ask their school or local librarian for a book on bullying behaviors similar to

those described in the program. Have students present an oral or written report

to the class on the book. Tell them that as they read, they should think about the

following questions:

• Was the bully a boy or a girl?

• What was the behavior the bully engaged in? Did he or she see their

behavior as bullying? Why or why not?

• What effect did the bully's behavior have on the target(s)?

• Did the bully plead that he/she “was only joking” or “only having fun?”

• Was the bully ever apologetic about his or her behavior? What was the

outcome?

Language Arts; Creative Expression; ArtMany boys and girls who bully don't see themselves as bullies, but their

behavior proves it. Have students turn themselves into magazine columnists and

write an advice column to either Jack or Emma or Brian or Morgan and Kaylie,

advising them to see themselves as others see them, as bullies. Tell students to

suggest in their column that these characters should ask themselves before they

decide to pick on another kid, “How would I like it if someone did this to me?”

If students wish, they can put a design around the borders of their column.

Assemble the columns into a book students can look at from time to time.

Ask for volunteers to design back and front covers.

What’s a Bully?13

Dear Family Member,

Your child has viewed a program called What's a Bully? Not surprisingly, bullying

among children happens more often than most people think. Elementary school

students probably encounter a bully or two every day, in class or on the playground.

But not all kids whose behavior can be considered bullying see themselves as bullies

or think about how their words and actions affect others. Their excuse for taunting,

teasing, spreading rumors, or even for sending nasty messages online is, “I was just

having fun,” or “I was just joking.”

What’s a Bully? is designed to help students identify and recognize the kinds of

behavior that can be considered bullying and encourage them to examine their own

behavior in that light. First making it clear that both boys and girls can be bullies, the

program dramatizes different bullying behaviors to make students aware that bullying

can mean:

• pushing others around or damaging their possessions;

• using words—taunts and putdowns—to hurt others' feelings;

• spreading rumors or gossip in a sneaky manner to make other kids miserable;

• sending anonymous instant-message insults and threats over the Internet.

The program's aim is to help children realize that the best way to figure out whether

what they do can be considered bullying, is to ask themselves, “How would I feel if

someone did this to me?” Using this question as a jumping-off point for a discussion

with your child about bullying issues can be very productive. Two resources you may

find helpful are:

Linda Eyre and Richard Eyre. Teaching Your Child

Sensitivity. Fireside, 1995.

William Voors. The Parent's Book About Bullying;

Changing the Course of Your Child's Life. Hazelden,

2000.

What’s a Bully?14

Send-Home Page

Draw pictures to go with the words. Then cut out and staple the pages together.

What’s a Bully? © Sunburst Visual Media, a division of Global Video, LLC15

On the playground with friends, Drew tossesAlan’s baseball glove over the school fence.

Drew looks at his friends, but no one laughs.Drew insists, “I’m just having fun.”

Drew thinks this over. Telling Alan he’s sorry, hegoes around the fence to get the glove back.

Timmy asks, “Would you like it if somone did thatto you?”

1. 2.

3. 4.

Take-Home Book

Part One: The Tough GuyA Bully Is… .................................................................................... Activity Sheet 1

Tell Jack’s Story ............................................................................... Activity Sheet 2

A Letter to Jack .............................................................................. Activity Sheet 3

If You See a Bully ............................................................................ Activity Sheet 4

Part Two: Words Can Hurt, TooCould You Be a Bully? .................................................................... Activity Sheet 1

A Different Kind of Bully ................................................................ Activity Sheet 2

How It Feels ..................................................................................... Activity Sheet 3

Part Three: You Know What I Heard? How the Story Got Its Start ............................................................. Activity Sheet 1

What’s Your Story? .................................................................... Activity Sheet 2

The Scoop on Rumors .................................................................... Activity Sheet 3

Part Four: The Internet BullyA New Kind of Bully ...................................................................... Activity Sheet 1

Internet Bully .................................................................................. Activity Sheet 2

So What’s a Bully? ......................................................................... Activity Sheet 3

Activity Sheets may be copied for class distribution.

What’s a Bully?16

Table of Contents - Activity Sheets

If you look around any room full of kids, would you be able to pick out bullies? As the

program points out, bullies come in all shapes and sizes. Read over each statement and mark

whether you Agree or Disagree that it is true of bullies. Then get together with a partner or

small group to compare and discuss your answers.

AGREE DISAGREE

1. Boys can be bullies but girls don't bully.

2. Some bullies want to be thought of as tough guys.

3. It's easy to spot a bully. They all act the same.

4. Some people bully to show their friends how “cool” they are.

5. If you stand by and laugh when bullying happens, it means you approve of the bully's behavior.

6. If a bully says mean things about another person, that

person can easily laugh it off.

7. If you don't say anything when bullying happens, it

encourages the bully to keep bullying.

8. Spreading rumors and gossip is not the same thing as bullying.

9. Having a reputation as a bully means you can never change

and give up bullying.

10. A bully who says, “I was just fooling around,” should be

forgiven for his or her bullying behavior.

11. If you bully someone over the Internet, you can't be found out.


A Bully Is…Activity Sheet

o o

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Part 1: The Tough Guy


Make a storybook about how Jack learns that bullying doesn’t make him “cool.”

Jack plays a trick with Kenny’s sneaker.

His friends laugh.Jack smashes Billy’s cupcakes. His friends laugh.

“But,” Jack protests, “I was only fooling around!”Jack’s friends tell him he’s not invited to go camping

with them because he is a bully.

1. 2.

3. 4.

Tell Jack’s Story

Activity Sheet


Jack thought that playing tricks on Kenny and Billy was “just fooling around,” and

would make his friends see him as “cool.” However, he found out differently when he

was excluded from the camping trip. Write a letter to Jack to tell him as a friend why his

behavior is really bullying, and far from being “cool.”


A Letter to Jack

Dear Jack,

Your Friend,

Activity Sheet


Could you recognize a bully by his/her behavior? Think about a time when you saw a

friend or classmate picking on or teasing another kid. Then answer the questions.

Would you think of him or her as a bully? YES NO

How did the situation make you feel? _________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________

Did you think the bully was being “cool” or just “fooling around”?

__________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________

What, if anything, could you have done to stop the bullying?

__________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________________


If You See a Bully

Activity Sheet


o o

Many people don't even realize when they're behaving like a bully. Could you be one?

For each question, circle your answer “yes,” “no,” or “sometimes.”

1. Do you enjoy teasing others?

YES NO SOMETIMES

2. If you see that your teasing is hurting someone's feelings, do you keep it up?

YES NO SOMETIMES

3. Do you think it's fun to embarrass someone?

YES NO SOMETIMES

4, When another person is teasing someone, do you go along with the teasing?

YES NO SOMETIMES

5. If you feel someone else is getting too much attention, do you put that person down?

YES NO SOMETIMES

6. Do you feel you always have to be in control?

YES NO SOMETIMES

What was your score? Were you surprised by how many “Yes” or

“Sometimes” answers you had? If so, this is a good time to think

about your behavior. Ask yourself before you pick on or tease someone:

“How would I feel in that person's place?”


Could You Be a Bully?

Activity Sheet

Part 2: Words Can Hurt, Too

Emma's way of bullying is different from Jack's. She says hurtful things without thinking.

Here are ten things that happened in Emma's story, but they are out of order. Number them

in the right order.

______ Karen picks Tina's present to open first. “Thanks, Tina, for your

nice card,” she says.

______ Emma laughs, “That shirt is teeny-weeny, just like Tiny Tina.”

This really makes Tina feels bad. She asks Emma, “Why are you

picking on me?”

______ It's Karen's birthday. At her party, her friends are making name jewelry.

______ But Emma is picking on Tina, using words to hurt Tina's feelings.

Tina bursts into tears.

______ Emma says, “Did you forget? Her new name's Tiny.” “Stop saying

that,” Tina tells Emma.

______ Emma finishes first, but Tina is still looking through the blocks and

beads to find an “A” for the final letter of her name.

______ “I'm not picking on you,” says Emma. “Can't you take a joke?”

______ Emma picks up a “Y” and gives it to Tina, “Use this instead. It

matches you perfectly Tiny Tina.” Some of the girls laugh, but others

are embarrassed.

______ After Karen tells Emma that she's been acting like a bully, Emma

apologizes to Tina.

______ Karen opens Tina's present, a shirt that turns out to be too small

for Karen but just the right size for Tina.


A Different Kind of Bully

Activity Sheet


Emma thought she was being funny, but she was really being mean to Tina. Using the

Word Box below, make a list of the words that describe what you think Tina was feeling

while Emma was teasing her.

__________________________________ __________________________________

__________________________________ __________________________________

__________________________________ __________________________________

__________________________________ __________________________________

Now make a list of the words from the Word Box that describe how you would feel if

you heard a classmate saying mean things about someone.

__________________________________ __________________________________

__________________________________ __________________________________

__________________________________ __________________________________

__________________________________ __________________________________


How It Feels

Activity Sheet


angry worried hurt outraged

unhappy embarrassed ashamed threatened

sorry scared distressed indifferent

interested confused excited troubled

upset sad curious sympathetic

WORD BOX


Brian liked being popular with the other kids.So when his friends started paying attention to the new kid Charlie, Brian became jealous and angry.

Brian decided to be sneaky. He spread a rumor thatCharlie was a liar: there was no such magazine.

Charlie said he has a surfboard and had been written about in a surfing magazine.

The rumor about Charlie spread quickly aroundthe school.

As a result, no one would speak to Charlie.Charlie could not understand why.

1. 2.

3. 4.

5. 6.

Activity Sheet

Part 3: Do You Know What I Heard?

How the Story Got Its Start

Make a storybook about how the rumor about Charlie got started.

Has anyone ever tried to spread a rumor about you? Did anyone question it?

Were you able to stop it? Write about the situation and its outcome.

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________


What’s Your Story?

Activity Sheet


Spreading rumors or gossip about someone is just as much a bullying behavior as picking

on someone. Here are some ways rumors get started and ways they can be stopped. Add

your own ideas to the list and share them with the class.

Rumors get started because people . . .

• want power or control

• want to cause trouble

• are jealous of the attention being paid to someone else

• think spreading a rumor is the way to get even

• want to feel part of the “in” group

• __________________________________________________________

• __________________________________________________________

You can act to stop a rumor by . . .

• finding out the true facts

• not repeating something you aren't sure is true

• making the rumor stop with you

• refusing to be an audience

• ignoring it

• __________________________________________________________

• __________________________________________________________


The Scoop on Rumors

Activity Sheet


Morgan and Kaylie are ______________________________ . Then Morgan has an

_______________________ . She had heard her sister Allison talking about someone in her

class who sent _______________________ Instant Messages over the Internet. Morgan tells

Kaylie, “Let's do it. We'll make up a name, and say _______________________ stuff.” They

decide to __________________________ Emily. She'd never think ____________________

would do that to her, says Morgan. “It'll be __________________________ .”

Their first message to Emily is just _________________________ . To Morgan and

Kaylie, it's ____________________________ fun. But then their messages turn mean and

______________________ . The next day, Morgan and Kaylie learn from James that Emily

is ____________________ to come to school. “Some ________________________ are after

her,” he says. Hearing this, Kaylie asks, “What should we do?” “Nothing,” says Morgan.

Later, Allison hears them talking and asks what they did. When they tell her, she says

that the kids in her class who did the same thing were ______________________ . “But we

were just ____________________ around,” explains Morgan. Says Allison, “You think it's

____________________ to say mean or ____________________ things on the Internet you

would never say in person. Would you have thought it was funny if ____________________

did that to you?” Sorry about what they did, Morgan and Kaylie ______________________

never to do it again.


A New Kind of Bully

Activity Sheet

Part 4: The Internet Bully

promise bullies harmless scary

threatening silly afraid suspended

joking anyone funny bored

stupid idea okay

mystery someone instant message

Morgan and Kaylie went looking for something fun and different to do. What they found

turned out to be a new kind of bullying. Choose words from the Word Box to fill in the

blanks to tell their story.

What’s a Bully?28

Morgan and Kaylie are ______________________________ . Then Morgan has an

_______________________ . She had heard her sister Allison talking about someone in her

class who sent _______________________ Instant Messages over the Internet. Morgan tells

Kaylie, “Let's do it. We'll make up a name, and say _______________________ stuff.” They

decide to __________________________ Emily. She'd never think ____________________

would do that to her, says Morgan. “It'll be __________________________ .”

Their first message to Emily is just _________________________ . To Morgan and

Kaylie, it's ____________________________ fun. But then their messages turn mean and

______________________ . The next day, Morgan and Kaylie learn from James that Emily

is ____________________ to come to school. “Some ________________________ are after

her,” he says. Hearing this, Kaylie asks, “What should we do?” “Nothing,” says Morgan.

Later, Allison hears them talking and asks what they did. When they tell her, she says

that the kids in her class who did the same thing were ______________________ . “But we

were just ____________________ around,” explains Morgan. Says Allison, “You think it's

____________________ to say mean or ____________________ things on the Internet you

would never say in person. Would you have thought it was funny if ____________________

did that to you?” Sorry about what they did, Morgan and Kaylie ______________________

never to do it again.

A New Kind of Bully

Answer Key Activity Sheet


promise bullies harmless scary

threatening silly afraid suspended

joking anyone funny bored

stupid idea okay

mystery someone instant message

Morgan and Kaylie went looking for something fun and different to do. What they found

turned out to be a new kind of bullying. Choose words from the Word Box to fill in the

blanks to tell their story.

bored

ideamystery

stupidinstant message anyone

funny

sillyharmless

threateningbulliesafraid

suspendedjoking

okay scary

someonepromise

Internet bullying, also called cyberbullying, has become a huge problem because it is so

easy for one person to send insulting or threatening messages to another person. Write a

short essay on why this kind of bullying can be so scary to its target. Include any ideas you

have to prevent or stop Internet bullying. Use the back of this page if you need more room.

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________


Internet Bullying

Activity Sheet


In the program, you learned that bullies come in all shapes and sizes. But how do you

know if some behavior of yours is bullying? The way to figure this out is to ask yourself,

“How would I like it if someone did this to me?” In the space below, describe why asking

this question can help you avoid being a bully. Draw a picture to illustrate how you would

feel as a result.

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________________


So What’s a Bully?

Activity Sheet


Reading for Educators and ParentsAlexander, Jenny. Bullying: Practical and Easy-to-Follow Advice. Penguin USA,

1998. A guide to handling this huge problem.

Beane, Allen L. The Bully-Free Classroom: Over 100 Tips and Strategies for

Teachers K-8. Free Spirit Publishing, 1999. Practical and effective strategies

for coping with bullying behavior, encouraging parent involvement, and

making classrooms a place to learn.

Bott, C. J. The Bully in the Book and In the Classroom. Scarecrow Press, 2004.

Using books on bullying arranged by grade levels, addresses the kinds of

bullying behavior that occurs at each particular age.

Cooper, Scott. Sticks and Stones: 7 Ways Your Child Can Deal With Teasing, Conflict

and Other Hard Times. Random House, 2000. How parents can help their

children learn to speak up for themselves assertively, gently, and effectively.

Davis, Stan. Schools Where Everyone Belongs: Practical Strategies for Reducing

Bullying. Stop Bullying Now, 2005. Practical information for school person-

nel on reducing the incidence of bullying.

Dellasega, Cheryl, and Charisse Nixon. Girl Wars: 12 Strategies That Will End

Female Bullying. Simon & Schuster, 2003. Girls want to help each other and

form positive relationships, say the authors, who argue that all girls need is

guidance from concerned adults to show them how.

Eyre, Linda and Richard. Teaching Your Child Sensitivity. Fireside, 1995. Help for

parents in making children aware of the needs and feelings of others.

Freedman, Judy S. Easing the Teasing: Helping Your Child Deal With Name-Calling,

Ridicule, and Verbal Bullying. Contemporary Books, 2002. How to help chil-

dren deal effectively with painful teasing and develop lifelong coping skills.

What’s a Bully?31

Suggested Reading

Hoover, John H. and Ronald Oliver. Bullying Prevention Handbook. National

Educational Service, 1997. A comprehensive tool for understanding, preventing,

and reducing day-to-day bullying.

Roberts, Donald F., et al. Kids and Media in America. Cambridge University Press,

2003. This comprehensive picture of young people's media behavior examines the

full array of media available to children and adolescents, describes amount of

time they spend with each medium, the kinds of content they choose, and the

physical, social and psychological context of much of their exposure.

Simmons, Rachel. “Cliques, Clicks, Bullies and Blogs.” Washington Post, September 28,

2003, p.B01. How the Internet has transformed the landscape of children's social

lives.

Simmons, Rachel. Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls. Harcourt,

2002. Arguing that girls are socialized to value friendships but not to express the

anger that might destroy them. Describes the many kinds of aggression girls act

out to one another, provides parents, teachers, and girls themselves clear-cut

strategies for resisting them.

Stein, Nan. Bully-Proof: A Teacher's Guide on Teasing and Bullying for Use With Fourth

and Fifth Grade Students. National Educational Association, 1996. Eleven core

lessons plus teaching tips.

Sullivan, Keith. The Anti-Bullying Handbook. Oxford University Press, 2000. An

overview of bullying and what is needed to solve the problem.

Voors, William. The Parent's Book About Bullying: Changing the Course of Your Child's

Life. Hazelden, 2000. Sound advice for helping both the instigators and targets of

bullying.

Fiction for Grades 3 to 5Adams, W. Royce. The Computer's Nerd. Rairarubia Books, 2000. Bullied incessantly

by three boys who consider him a nerd, Arthur Dingle turns to his new computer

to help him get even, but finds the machine far from user-friendly.

Alexander, Martha. Move Over, Twerp. Dial, 1989. Big kids keep taking away Jeffrey's

seat on the bus, until he finds an ingenious solution.

What’s a Bully?32

Amos, Janine. Bully. Benchmark Books, 1995. Three stories of young children who

get angry and pick on someone provide a good springboard for discussion.

Blume, Judy. Blubber. Dell, 1974. Having engaged in bullying herself, Jill hates it

when the tables are turned.

Carrick, Carol. What a Wimp! Clarion Books, 1983. It takes time, but Barney finally

realizes that facing up to Lenny's bullying is something he must do on his own.

Conford, Ellen. Revenge of the Incredible Dr. Rancid and His Youthful Assistant, Jeffrey.

Little, Brown, 1980. An eleven-year-old boy uses his secret diary in his attempt

to cope with the class bully.

Clements, Andrew. Jake Drake Bully Buster. Thorndike Press, 2002. In the past, fourth-

grader Jake has found himself a magnet for bullies. Now he reminisces about his

experiences in second grade with Superbully Link Baxter, who tormented Jake

until the two were teamed up for a Thanksgiving project.

DeClements, Barthe. Nothing's Fair in Fifth Grade. Puffin, 1990. Elsie Edwards is the

new girl in school and the butt of her class because of her weight problem, until

her classmates' dislike turns to acceptance.

DePaola, Tomie. Oliver Button is a Sissy. Econo-Clad Books, 1999. Oliver doesn't let

his classmates' taunts stop him from doing what he likes best.

Keats, Ezra Jack. Goggles. Puffin, 1998. Peter and his friend find a pair of goggles in a

junk heap that can protect them from neighborhood bullies.

Ludwig, Trudy. My Secret Bully. Riverwood Press, 2004. Emotional bullies use relation-

ships, words and gestures as their weapons of attack. Inspirational story shows

victims of emotional bullying that they are not alone; includes an important

resource to help parents.

Moss, Marissa. Amelia Takes Command. Pleasant Company, 1999. As fifth grade begins,

Amelia's journal details her struggles with two unexpected problems: a fickle

friend and a constant bully.

What’s a Bully?33

O'Neill, Alexis. The Recess Queen. Scholastic Press, 2002. A rhyming story in which a

bully is caught off-guard and effectively disarmed by the power of kindness and

friendship.

Robinson, Nancy. Wendy and the Bullies. Hastings House, 1987. Fearing the bullies they

find all around them, Wendy and her friend Karen dream up a number of elabo-

rate strategies for ridding themselves of bullies forever.

Scribner, Virginia. Gopher Takes Heart. Viking Press, 1993. Gopher has put up with

Fletcher's bullying for a long time, but this Valentine's Day he is compelled to

face him down.

Shreve, Susan. Joshua T. Bates Takes Charge. Knopf, 1993. When a bully starts torment-

ing Joshua's new friend, Joshua must decide what to do.

Smith-Mansell, Dana. Stop Bullying Bobby! Helping Children Cope With Teasing and

Bullying. New Horizon Press, 2004. A girl who feels compassion for a classmate

who is being bullied finally gains the confidence to talk to her parents about the

bullying.

Spinelli, Jerry. Fourth Grade Rats. Scholastic, 1991. Suds tries to impress Joey by imitat-ing Joey's rebellious and bullying behavior, and learns an important lesson aboutgrowing up.

Stolz, Mary. The Bully of Barkham Street. Harper & Row, 1963. Why Martin Hastings

turned into a bully and how he ceased to be one.

Wilson, Jacqueline. Bad Girls. Delacorte Press, 2001. Feeling herself an ugly duckling,

10-year-old Mandy finds it hard to cope with ongoing taunts from beautiful,

raven-haired Kim, the school bully.

Wojciechowski, Susan. Don't Call Me Beanhead. Candlewick Press, 1996. Among her

other troubles, Bernice hates being called Beanhead.

Yep, Laurence. Cockroach Cooties. Hyperion Press, 2001. Two Asian-American brothers

combine forces against a common enemy, Arnie the school bully.

Zeier, Joan T. Stick Boy. Atheneum, 1993. Having shot up seven inches in one year,

sixth-grader Eric Bonner's life at school is made unbearable by bullies, until his

What’s a Bully?34

mother transfers him to another school. Unfortunately, bullies exist at this new

school, too.

Nonfiction for Grades 3-5Cohen-Posey, Kate, M.S., LMHC, LMFT. How to Handle Bullies, Teasers and Other

Meanies: A Book That Takes the Nuisance Out of Name-Calling and Other

Nonsense. Rainbow Books, 1995. Chockfull of practical strategies for handling

bullies.

Carter, Jay, Editor. Taking the Bullies By the Horns: Children's Version of the Best-

Selling Book, “Nasty People”. Unicorn Press, 1998. Teaches kids how bullies

operate, gives them the skills they need to deal with bullies, maintain healthy

self-esteem, without becoming bullies themselves.

Kaufman, Gershen, et al. Stick Up for Yourself: Every Kid's Guide to Personal Power

and Positive Self-Esteem. Free Spirit Publishing, revised 1999. Teaches the skills

necessary to make choices, solve problems, and feel good about yourself.

Myers, Steve, and Pete Sanders. Bullying (What Do You Know About?) Copper Beech

Books, 1996. Help, cartoon-style, for dealing with bullying situations.

Verdick, Elizabeth, editor. Bullies Are a Pain in the Brain. Free Spirit Publishers, 1997.

Blends humor with serious, practical suggestions for understanding, avoiding,

and standing up to bullies.

Webster-Doyle, Terrance. Why is Everybody Always Picking on Me? A Guide to Under-

standing Bullies for Young People. Weatherhill, 1999. Stories and activities that

demonstrate how to resolve conflicts and confront hostile aggression peaceably.

Internet ResourcesFor Educators and Parents

For the U.S. Department of Education's manual, Preventing Bullying: A Manual forSchools and Communities: www.cde.ca.gov/spbranch/ssp/bullymanual.htm

For information for educators and parents on bullying from the National P.T.A.:http://www.pta.org/bullying/

For a list of literature about bullying: http://www.carolhurst.com/subjects/bullies.html

What’s a Bully?35

http://www.nepamd.com/Bullies.htm

For keeping kids who play video games online safe from “griefer” cyberbullies:http://www.microsoft.com/athome/security/children/griefers.mspx

For Kidshttp://nomorebullies.com

http://kidshealth.org/kid/feeling/emotion/Bullies.html

Related Materials from Sunburst Visual Media“Buzz, Buzz, Buzz: Did You Hear About…”

15-minute program for Grades 3 to 5

“Student Workshop Harassment Hurts: Gossiping, Taunting and Bullying”


“Student Workshop I Was Just Kidding: Learning About Harassment”


“When You See Bullying Happen: What A Bystander Can Do”


“Real Kids What We Learned About Bullying”


“Bullying: What Parents Can Do”

Booklet for Parents of Children in Grades K-8

“Stop Picking on Me: How to Deal with Bullying”

Pamphlet for Grades 3-5

What’s a Bully?36

WHAT’S A BULLY?

HOSTCan you pick out the bullies in these pictures? What do you think? Is he a bully?

What about her?

Having trouble? No surprise—that’s because you can’t tell a bully just from looking, bullies

come in all shapes, ages and sizes—boys and girls. Besides, bullies don’t all act the same

either. So what is a bully? That’s what this program is all about.


HOSTWhen you think of a bully—you probably think of a tough guy—someone who picks on

other kids…especially if they’re smaller. Someone who thinks he’s cool. Like Jack.

JACKHey Kenny, nice sneakers.

KENNYThanks.

JACKI bet they’re really great for playing basketball.

KENNYHey give it back!

JACKJack passes it to Sam. Sam dribbles…and passes back to Jack. Sam pretends like he’s

dribbling.

Kenny goes after Sam. Sam passes it back to Jack. Kenny tries to grab the sneaker back.

Jack is driving to the basket—he shoots. He scores! You lose. Nice pass, Sam.

What’s a Bully?37

Script

HOSTJack thinks that when he picks on someone, the other kids think he’s cool. But that’s not

how it is. In fact, the other kids are kind of afraid of Jack. And they go along with what

he does because they’re scared that if they don’t, he’ll start picking on them.

Jack doesn’t see himself as a bully. He sees himself as the kid everyone wants to be

friends with. But the other day, well…Jack found out something new.

SAMOkay, we’ll meet at my house at five o’clock. Then my dad is going to take us to the camp.

JACKWhat camp?

SAMUhm…..nothing.

JACKWhat are you guys talking about?

RYANWe’re…uhm…all going camping this weekend.

JACKHow come no one told me?

SAMUhmm....because…

JACKBecause why?

SAMWell, uhm…my parents said you couldn’t come.

JACKWhat? Why?

SAMBecause they say you have a reputation as a bully—and they didn’t want anyone being

picked on.

What’s a Bully?38

JACKMe? Didn’t you tell them I just fool around. You know, have some fun?

RYANWell, it’s not just fooling around.

BILLYYeah, tell me about it.

JACKYou guys laugh at all the stuff I do.

BILLYYeah, smashing my cupcakes was really funny.

SAMYou just have to stop bullying. People are going to be afraid of you.

HOSTJack learned that what he thought was funny and cool, others saw as bullying. He

learned that the kids he thought were his friends weren’t really. Because they didn’t like

the things he did. That doesn’t mean they wouldn’t be his friend if he changed his ways.

And doing that is up to him.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS• Jack wants the others to think he’s cool. Why would he think his actions make him

seem “cool”?

• Why do you think the other kids laughed at Jack’s bullying of Kenny and Billy?

What do you think they were really feeling?


HOSTSo we saw that some bullies like Jack act tough and push people around. But some

bullies use words to hurt and control other kids. Emma was that kind of bully.

Emma’s problem was that she would say things without thinking how her words would

affect someone else. That’s what happened at her friend Karen’s birthday party. All the

girls were making jewelry with letter blocks to spell out their name. Emma was making

a necklace and Tina was making a bracelett.

What’s a Bully?39

EMMALook, I did it. Isn’t it pretty? Let’s see yours Tina.

TINALook, I can’t finish. I can’t find an ‘A’.

EMMAHere, use this instead. It matches you perfectly. See, T-I-N-Y. Tiny. Just like you.

Tiny Tina!

KARENSuch a nice card. Thanks Tina.

EMMADid you forget? Her new name’s Tiny.

TINANo, it’s not! Stop saying that!

KARENHow cute!

EMMAIt’s so small! Tiny probably thought it was for her! It’s tiny, just like Tiny Tina.

TINAWhy are you picking on me?

EMMAI’m not picking on you. It’s a joke. Can’t you take a joke?

HOSTBut Emma is picking on Tina. She’s doing it with words. She doesn’t even seem to

realize that Tina is upset.

EMMAWhat are you guys doing in here?

What’s a Bully?40

KARENWhat do you think?

EMMAWhy’s Tina crying?

KARENBecause you hurt her feelings.

EMMANo, I’m not.

TINAYes you did.

EMMAI was just fooling around.

TINAThat’s not what it felt like to me.

KARENOr me either.

TINAI wanted to have fun at the party and you’re making it horrible.

EMMAI was just trying to be funny.

KARENWell, you’re not funny. You’re a bully. And you’re ruining my party.

EMMAI’m not a bully.

KARENWell, you’re acting like one. Saying mean things like that.

EMMAOh….

What’s a Bully?41

KARENYou should apologize to Tina.

EMMAI’m sorry, it won’t happen again.

HOSTNot all bullies push kids around or hit them. Some bullies use mean words like name-

calling and taunting—and that can be just as hurtful. So think about what you say before

you say it. Ask yourself how you would feel if someone said the same thing to you.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS• Emma said she was “just fooling around.” Is bullying ever a joke? Why or why not?

• Why is it a good idea to think about what you’re going to say before you say it?

Part 3: You Know What I Heard?

HOSTWe’ve learned that bullies can hurt people by pushing and hitting. And we saw that

bullies can also hurt people with their words. But there are some bullies who are not

obvious at all. In fact, they’re kind of sneaky. To explain what I mean, let’s take a look at

Brian.

Brian has lots of friends. He’s pretty popular. But one day things started to change for

Brian. A new boy came to school. Charlie was from Hawaii. All the kids were really

interested in getting to know him.

SARAThe new guy, Charlie, has his own surfboard. And he was in a surfer magazine!

BRIANSo what?

SARASo, he’s like, famous!

BRIANBig deal.

What’s a Bully?42

SARADude, chill!

BRIANDude? No one says “dude” anymore, Sara.

SARACharlie says it. Maybe that’s because he’s a sufer…dude.

HOSTThen he got very jealous.

BRIANSara, why didn’t you save my seat?

SARACharlie had nowhere to sit.

CHARLIESorry! Do you want your seat back?

SARANo Charlie, you can stay. Brian, there’s a seat at the end.

HOSTFinally, he thought of a way to get even. He decided to start a rumor.

TIMHey, look at this. There’s no surfer magazine? He doesn’t even surf!

MOLLYYou mean he made the whole thing up?

HOSTIt didn’t take long for the rumor to spread. And no one questioned it. No one bothered to

find out if it was true. Everyone just believed what they heard. And just like that…no one

wanted to talk to Charlie. He couldn’t understand what was happening. So finally he

asked Tim what was going on.

CHARLIETim, can I talk to you?

What’s a Bully?43

TIMNot now.

CHARLIEPlease.

TIM What?

CHARLIEHow come no one will talk to me?

TIMBecause you’re a liar.

CHARLIEWhat?!

TIMThe whole surfer story and the magazine. It’s all a lie.

CHARLIEThat’s not a lie. It’s true.

TIMBrian said he couldn’t find a magazine called Surf—and he checked.

CHARLIEHe’s not a very good checker. What do you call this?

TIMHey! That really is you! Picture is awesome!

• • •

TIMYou know what? Charlie showed me the magazine. His picture was in it. He wasn’t

lying, Brain was.

MOLLYWhy would Brain say that?

TIMI don’t know. But it wasn’t right. And I’m going to tell him.

What’s a Bully?44

JOEWe should all tell him.

SARAThat’s like bullying. Only it’s……sneaky.

HOSTBrain doesn’t punch, he doesn’t hit, he doesn’t use mean words or call people names.

But, he’s still a bully. Bullies like Brain use rumors and gossip to hurt the kids they pick

on.

So be on the look-out. Don’t believe all the stories you hear. Get the facts and find out

the truth. That’s the best way to stop bullies who spread rumors.

DISCUSSION QUESIONS• Is spreading a rumor the same thing as bullying? Why or why not?

• Why is bullying by spreading a rumor not as obvious as other types of bullying?


HOSTWe’ve seen bullies who use their fists, we’ve seen bullies who use their words, and we’ve

seen bullies who use rumors and gossip. Now, let’s look at a new kind of bully. A bully

who uses the Internet.

KAYLIEWhat do you want to do?

MORGANI don’t know. Something…fun, different.

KAYLIEWhat?

MORGANI heard my sister talking about this kid in her class who got these weird, mystery Instant

Messages from someone—she didn’t know who—and it made like this whole big deal in

her class.

What’s a Bully?45

KAYLIESo?

MORGANSo, let’s do it. Let’s send someone a mystery IM.

KAYLIEWhat do you mean ‘mystery’?

MORGANWe’ll make up a name and say stupid stuff.

KAYLIEOkay.

MORGANLet’s call ourselves …… weRwatchingU

KAYLIEThat sounds scary. Who should we send it to?

MORGANI know, let’s send it to Emily.

KAYLIEEmily Rogers?

MORGANYeah.

KAYLIEWhy her?

MORGANCause…she thinks she’s such a big deal. She’d never think anyone would do something

like this to her. It’ll be funny.

KAYLIEYeah, and we sure couldn’t say dumb things to her face!

What’s a Bully?46

HOSTSo Kaylie and Morgan sent Emily a message. The first one was just silly. They were so

surprised when she answered.

MORGAN“Emily, is it true that you like Billy Wilson? “

KAYLIEOh, wow, she answered. Can you believe it?

“Who is this?”

“Just some mystery people who know you like Billy.”

“Who told you that?”

“We know it’s true, and we’re going to tell everyone…especially Billy.”

HOSTKaylie and Morgan were having a good time—and they thought they were having some

harmless fun. But as the instant messages went along, they got a little longer, and a little

nastier. And by the time they sent the last message, they had said some pretty mean and

threatening things.

MORGAN“We’re going to tell everyone at school that you cheated on your social studies test…that

we saw you, and that you cheat all the time. No one will want to be your friend. You

better watch out!”

HOSTThe next day at school, the girls discovered that their game wasn’t so funny.

JAMESDid you hear about Emily?

KAYLIEWhat?

JAMESSome bullies are after her.

What’s a Bully?47

MORGANWhat?!

KAYLIEBullies?

JAMESYes, she got these really scary instant messages.

MORGANThat’s not bullying.

JAMESShe thinks so.

KAYLIEWhere did you hear about it?

JAMESFrom my mother. She’s real good friends with Emily’s mom. She said Emily’s crying

and she doesn’t want to come to school.

KAYLIEWhy not?

JAMESBecause she’s scared!

KAYLIEWow.

JAMESMy mother asked me if I knew who would do something like that. I couldn’t think of

anyone. Can you?

MORGANUhm……nope.

• • •KAYLIEWhat are we going to do?

What’s a Bully?48

MORGANDo? Nothing! Don’t say a word to anyone, we’ll talk about it after school.

• • •KAYLIEThis is awful. What are we going to do?

MORGANI don’t know.

ALLISONDo about what? What? Out with it. What’s going on?

MORGANWell…yesterday we were fooling around and we made up a name and sent this girl

Emily some funny instant messages…

ALLISONExplain funny.

MORGANJust dumb stuff. Like saying she liked this boy….

KAYLIEAnd we kind of of said some other….sort of mean things.

ALLISONWhy’d you do that?

MORGANWell, didn’t you say that’s what some kids at your school did.

ALLISONYeah. And they got suspended.

KAYLIE and MORGANSuspended?!

MORGANWhy?

What’s a Bully?49

ALLISONBecause you’re not allowed to go around bullying people and sending them mean

messages.

KAYLIEWe weren’t bullying anyone!

ALLISONNo? What would you call it?

MORGANJoking around.

ALLISONA joke is supposed to be funny. Do you think Emily thought it was funny?

MORGANI don’t know.

ALLISONSee that’s a good way to figure out if what you’re doing is right or not. Put yourself in

the other person’s place. Think, “Would I like it if someone did this to me?”

MORGANSo what should we do now?

KAYLIEI guess we could tell her it was us.

MORGANI don’t want to say it to her face.

ALLISONIs that why you thought it was okay to do it on the Internet? Because she wouldn’t knowit was you?

MORGANWell, yeah.

What’s a Bully?50

ALLISONPeople think they can say things on the Internet that they would never say in per-

son—like it doesn’t matter if you can’t see each other.

MORGANWell, it sort of feels different.

ALLISONSo mean words don’t hurt, and threats aren’t scary—if you aren’t looking at the person.

MORGAN and KAYLIEWe get it.

MORGANHow about if we Instant Message her again and say that we were being stupid andwe didn’t mean anything by it.

KAYLIEAnd that we’re sorry and that we won’t do it again.

MORGANCome on, let’s do it.

HOSTThe Internet is a wonderful place to get information and chat with friends. But some-

times people misuse the Internet. Morgan and Kaylie thought they were just having

fun. But what they did wasn’t funny to Emily. And they thought that because they

couldn’t see Emily and she couldn’t see them, that their words didn’t have the same

meaning they would have had in person. And that just isn’t true.

And here’s one more thing you should know. Many people think they can say or do

whatever they want on the Internet because they think no one will know. But guess

what? Everything is traceable. If someone wants to find out, they can trace it. So use

the Internet the right way. Don’t misuse it.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS• Is sending anonymous instant messages ever “harmless fun”? Why or why not?

• Allison tells Morgan and Kaylie, “Ask yourself: would I like it if somone did that to

me?” Discuss why this is good advice.

What’s a Bully?51

HOSTSo what’s a bully? A bully is someone who frightens and hurts another person and wants

to have control.

Bullies can be physical—they can push people around and sometimes steal and damage

someone’s things.

Some bullies hurt people with their words—with putdowns and taunts.

Some bullies are sneaky. They work undercover to hurt people with rumors and gossip.

And some bullies hide behind a computer. They think they’re having fun. But what

they’re doing isn’t funny.

Bullies come in all shapes and sizes—they’re girls and boys. And as we’ve seen, often

they don’t even realize that others think of them as bullies.

Remember, the best way to figure out if what you do could be considered bullying is to

ask yourself, “How would I like it if someone did this to me?” If you wouldn’t like it,

that’s a good sign that it’s not the right thing to do and you shouldn’t do it to anyone

else.

You really don’t want to be a bully, do you?

THE END

What’s a Bully?52

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