What is Bullying?

It’s

with lesshurting someoneand

repeatedlypurposely

power.

• Bullying is aggressive behavior or intentional “harm doing” by one person or group

– It can be verbal (insults and/or threats)

– It can be psychological (spreading rumors and/or shunning the target/victim)

– It can be physical (knocking down and/or hitting the target/victim)

• It is carried out repeatedly and over time.

• It is targeted towards someone less powerful.

• Boys are most often overt bullies (i.e., teasing, hitting, or stealing)

• Girls are most often covert bullies (i.e., spreading rumors or exclusion)

What’s the difference?

Bullying vs.

having a conflict

Bullying is EVERYONE’S problem.

FACT: It’s violence.FACT: It has lasting effects.FACT: It’s common.

Bullying is just part of being a kid.

• academic problems

• social isolation• mental health problems

Being bullied toughens children up.FACT: Being bullied can cause

Being a bully has long-term consequences, too.

Bullies are at higher risk for:

• academic problems

• social isolation

• violence and crime

All bullying is physical.

FACT: Bullying can also be:

• indirect (relational)• verbal

For the bully, it’s all about

Who Are Bullies?

• People who bully typically demonstrate a strong sense of self -esteem. They may demonstrate this but in reality a bully has low self esteem which is why they choose to pick on other people.

Who Are Bullies? (continued)

• Bullies like to f eel powerful and in control

• They pick on others to make them feel better about themselves.

Anyone can be bullied.• aggressive targets• passive targets

The power of bystanders

The silent majority – people who stand by and watch are just as

guilty. They have power to stop it!

• Bullies target others to feel more powerful.

• Bullying has long-term consequences for everyone.

• Bullies, targets and bystanders all play a role in bullying.

Check in - Review

Assertiveness

• standing up for yourself without using violence

• respecting the rights of others

Assertive body language

• Stand tall.

• Make eye contact.

• Speak firmly.

Managing emotions

Strategies for managing anger

• Recognize it.

• Calm down.

• Find healthy emotional outlets.

Resolving conflicts…PEACEFULLY

• changes in behavior

• avoiding school

• drop in grades

• missing belongings

• headaches and stomachaches

Two common responses to bullying—and why they don’t work.• “Just ignore it.” (Ignoring a bully may

be seen as a passive response, which will invite more bullying)

• “Fight back!” (Violence usually leads to more violence, and bullying is no exception. Remember that bullies want to get a reaction out of their victims - so fighting back may only provoke the bully more)

Advice

• Stay calm.

• Be assertive.

• Get help.

Staying calm and confident

• visualization

• looking confident

• self-talk

Defusing a bully

• Agree with the facts.

• Make a joke.

• Reframe it.

Safety first

• Avoid the bully until the conflict gets resolved.

• Think safety in numbers.

• Get away and get help.

Friendship is the best protection.

• overcome shyness

• improve social skills.

• join in

Give positive alternatives.

• Encourage healthy interests.

• Turn strength into leadership.

• Get connected to the community.

Know when to seek help.

Empathy

• prevents bullying behavior

• makes bullying unacceptable

• “I” message:

I (feel this way) when (this happens). I need (this to happen).

• “You” message: (not an appropriate response)

YOU thief! I can’t believe YOU took my book without asking me. If YOU do it again, YOU’LL be sorry.”

Assertive-speak

Which is assertive?

“Stop it! You’re hurting my feelings!”

b. “I don’t like you calling me names. I want you to stop now.”

a.

Practice makes perfect.

• Role play.

• Practice decision making.