What did you Expect?...2017/01/01 · You have expectations about every area of your life:...

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Bill Loveless is the director of Christ Is Life Ministries (CILM). CILM is a non-profit, non-denominational ministry that focuses on discipleship. We teach Christians that Christ is our only Source for living the Christian life and what it looks like to be transformed into Christ-likeness.



What Did You Expect? Have you ever thought about how your expectations impact your Have you ever thought about how your expectations impact your life, especially when they go unmet? Think about this for a moment. You have expectations about every area of your life: yourself, your relationships, your work, God, and your Christian walk, to name just a few. Things tend to go well when your expectations are being met but what happens when they go unmet? .

How do your unmet expectations make you feel? Frustrated? How do your unmet expectations make you feel? Frustrated? Angry? Out of control? How do your unmet expectations negatively affect your relationships, your feelings about God and your Christian walk? Most importantly, how do you engage God and His truth to deal with or overcome your unmet expectations? .

This booklet will attempt to answer these questions through the following topics: .

• • What are realistic and unrealistic expectations about God, yourself, marriage, circumstances, and your Christian walk. .

• How unmet expectations negatively impact you, your relationship with God, your relationships with others and your Christian walk.

• How Satan uses your unmet expectations against you.

• What it looks like to engage God and His truth to overcome your unmet expectations. .






















What did you Expect?

Bill LovelessChrist Is Life Ministries




What Did You Expect?

Bill Loveless

Christ Is Life Ministries

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Copyright © 2017 by Bill Loveless All rights reserved. This book may not be copied or reprinted for commercial gain or profit. The use or copying of this material for personal or group study is permitted. Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. Scripture taken from the New American Standard Bible®, copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. Scripture taken from the New King James Version, copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked (GNT) are from the Good News Translation in Today’s English Version—Second Edition, copyright ©1992 by American Bible Society. Used by permission.

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Table of Contents

Introduction ...……………………………..…………. 3 Chapter One - Defining Expectations ………....… 6 Chapter Two - Expectations Concerning God...... 8 Chapter Three - Expectations About Yourself Concerning Your Christian Walk………………...... 16 Chapter Four - Expectations For Others ……...... 20 Chapter Five - Other Areas of Expectations …..... 24 Chapter Six - The Results of Your Unmet Expectations - Satan’s Strategies Concerning Your Unmet Expectations…………………………... 26 Chapter Seven - Engaging God To Deal With Unmet Expectations……………………..…………... 33

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What Did You Expect?

Introduction ThemoreI teach,disciple,andsimply livethemoreIrealizehowmanyexpectationsIhaveaboutmyself,God,others,andmyChristianwalk.As Ibegantothinkaboutall my expectations, I realized how they negativelyimpactedmewhentheywerenotmet.Takeamomentandlookatthefrontcoverandasyougo down that list think of any unmet expectations youmight have. Would you agree that those unmetexpectations have created some negative responses inyou?Who?What?Why?Where?When? If you are struggling to identify your expectations,think about what might be behind questions like these,especiallywhentheyareaskedinastateoffrustration:

• Whoareyoutobetellingmewhattodo?• WhatdoIneedtodotobelovedbyyou?• Whyisn’tmyspousemeetingmyneeds?• WherewasGodwhenthishappenedtome?• WhenamIgoingtostartexperiencingchanges in

myChristianlife?Many of these questions and the resultant frustrationstemfromexpectationsthatyouthinkhavenotbeenmetby others, by yourself or by God. Or just maybe thefrustrationiscausedbyothers’expectationsofyou.

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WhatIsTheOverflowofUnmetExpectations?Here are some examples of feelings you mightexperienceasaresultofyourunmetexpectations. DiscouragedHopeless Dejected WoundedUnloved Helpless Forgotten WorthlessRejected Miserable Inadequate BurdenedFrustrated Condemned Resigned WorriedCritical Judgmental Unhappy DismayedRegretful Angry Abused InadequateDispleased Exploited Spiteful VindictiveConfused Bewildered Trapped ParalyzedTroubled Perplexed Guarded NeglectedUnworthy Sorrowful Empty MelancholyAnxious Fearful Resentful LetdownDeceived Lonely Guilty PowerlessDefeated Insignificant Judged AshamedInsecure Incapable VulnerableMisunderstoodUnimportant Deceived Depressed Overwhelmed Canyourelatetoanyofthesefeelingsconcerningyourunmetexpectations?What is theresult ifwestay lockedinto these feelings? How will they negatively affect ourrelationshipsorourwalkwithGod? We will be answering these questions as we gothroughthestudy.Iwillbeaskingyoutorefertothislistanumberoftimesasyougothroughthebooklet.SummaryofThisBooklet Sincetheissueofunmetexpectationsissomethingweallfaceinmanyareasoflife,Ibelieveitisworthspendingtime studying. Therefore, here are the topicswewill belookingatinthisbooklet:

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• Definingexpectations.

• Whatarerealisticandunrealisticexpectations.

• How unmet expectations negatively impact

ourselves, our relationship with God and ourrelationshipwithothers.

• BeingawareofhowSatan/demonsuseourunmetexpectationsagainstus.

• What it looks like toengageGod todealwithour

unmetexpectations.Ipray,asyougothroughthisbooklet,theLordwilluseitforHispurposesinyourlifetotransformyou,healyou,andsetyoufree.

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CHAPTER ONE

Defining Expectations DefiningExpectationsIncontextof this topic, I simplydefineanexpectationas:

A BELIEF that something will happen or will

likely happen.

Wouldyouagreethatourexpectationsflowfromwhatwe believe? For example, if I believe that you are atrustworthypersonthenmyexpectationisthatIcantrustyoutokeepconfidentialthethingsIsaytoyou. Youmayhaveheardmesaythisbefore,“Youwillnotlivebeyondwhatyoubelieve.” Ibelievethesameis trueofourexpectationsbecauseourexpectations flowoutofwhatwebelievetobetrue.The Difference Between Realistic and UnrealisticExpectations I put expectations into two categories for Christians:realisticandunrealistic.

A REALISTIC expectation is one that lines

up with God’s TRUTH; whereas, an UNREALISTIC

expectation is one that is CONTRARY

to what God says is true.

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An example of a realistic expectation is that GodpromisesthisinPhilippians1:6:“For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will complete it until the day of Christ Jesus.” This verse is telling us that God is the Source totransformour lives.Aswedepend/believe inHim todothat,wecanexpectHimtokeepHispromise. An example of an unrealistic expectation based on afalsebelief isyoubelievingthatyouaretobethesourcewith God’s help to solve your problems, manage theoutcome, or make life work. Why? Because we justlearned that there is only one Source and it is God, notyou. Intheupcomingchapterswearegoingtolookatsomerealisticandunrealisticexpectations thatwehaveaboutGod,ourChristianwalk,andaboutothers.

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CHAPTER TWO

Expectations Concerning God ThegoodnewsaboutrealisticexpectationsconcerningGod is that we have His word which tells us the truthaboutHimself.Thesecondpartofthegoodnewsisthis:

If you KNOW and BELIEVE His truth then YOU

won’t have UNREALISTIC expectations about God.

The two key words concerning our expectations andGod are: know versus believe. I define “knowing” ashaving intellectual knowledge of God’s truth versus“believing” which is trusting God’s truth to be true.(Remember thatanon-Christiancan “know”God’swordbutwithout having accepted Christ, the unbeliever doesnot have theHoly Spirit to enable him/her to believe itandhaveconfidencethatitistrue.) However, this is where the difficulty arises when itcomes to God’s truth and our expectations. If you don’tknow the truth then you will certainly have unrealisticexpectations aboutGod. Butwhat if you know the truthabout God but don’t believe it? The result is the same:unrealisticexpectationsconcerningGod. Let’s me further explain this by looking at two keyareas where most Christians struggle with God: HischaracterandHispromises.

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1. Realistic and unrealistic expectations concerningGod’sCHARACTER.Let’s look at what God says about Himself and relatethattoourexpectations.a.GodlovesyouUNCONDITIONALLY“ForIamconvincedthatneitherdeath,norlife,norangels,norprincipalities,northingspresent,northingstocome,norpowers,norheight,nordepth,noranyothercreatedthing,willbeabletoseparateusfromtheloveofGod,

whichisinChristJesusourLord.”Romans8:38,39

“WehavecometoknowandhavebelievedthelovewhichGodhasforus.Godislove….”1John4:16

God lovesyouunconditionally.Hecan’tdootherwisebecause that is His character according to 1 John 4:16.(Notice how John separates the words “know” and“believe” in this passage. It is not only knowledge, it isbelief.) If you believe this, then you can realisticallyexpect that there is nothing you can do or not do topreventHimfromlovingyou. However,ifyoubelievethatGodcondemnsyouwhenyousin, thenwhatwillbeyourexpectation?Willyoubeexpecting to be punished by God? Is this expectationrealistic or unrealistic? It is unrealistic because itcontradicts God’s truth. The truth is that God no longercondemns you nomatterwhat you do. The truth is laidoutinRomans8:1:

“SonowthereisnocondemnationforthosewhobelongtoChristJesus.”Romans8:1

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Howmighthavingthisunrealisticexpectation impactyou?YoumightseeGodasanangryjudgereadytopunishyouwhenever you sin. Howwould this adversely affectyourrelationshipwithGod?Youcouldnotgrowclosetoan angry, judgmental, and condemning God. You wouldalwaysbetryingtodowhateverittakestoavoidsinningsothatyouwouldn’texperienceHisjudgment.DoyoustruggleconcerningGod’sloveforyou?Howdoesit make you feel towards God or yourself if yourexpectationsconcerningGod’slovehavenotbeenmet?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)b. GodisGOOD“FortheLORDisgoodandhisloveenduresforever;his

faithfulnesscontinuesthroughallgenerations.”Psalm100:5

WeseefromthispassagethatpartofGod’scharacteristhat He is good. Knowing this intellectually, however,haveyoustillaskedtheseorsimilarquestions:

1. If God is really good, then why does He allow bad things to happen to good people?

2. How could a good God allow a baby to be born in this condition?

3. Why does a good God allow so much pain and suffering in the world?

Think about it for a moment. Doesn't every one ofthese questions put unrealistic expectations on God’sgoodness?Why?BecausetheyequatewhatGodallowstowhoGodis.ThetruthisthatnomatterwhatGodallows,itdoesnotchangethetruththatHeisgood.

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IfyouputexpectationsonwhatGod’sgoodnessshouldlooklikethatdon'tlineupwiththetruthofwhoHeis,itwilllikelyresultinyourdoubtingGod’sgoodness.Wherecouldthateventuallylead?DoyoustrugglewithGodbeingagoodGod?Howdoesitmake you feel towards God or yourself if yourexpectationsconcerningHisgoodnesshavenotbeenmet?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)c.GodisSOVEREIGN “…theLordhasestablishedHisthroneintheheavens,and

Hissovereigntyrulesoverall”Psalm103:19

“Imakeknowntheendfromthebeginning,fromancienttimes,whatisstilltocome.Isay:Mypurpose

willstand,andIwilldoallthatIplease.”Psalm46:10 Let’s start by defining “sovereignty.” It means allthings are under God's rule and control and there isnothing that happens without His direction orpermission. ThegoodnewsisthatGodisnotonlygoodbutHeisincontrol. If you believe this truth, then you can have arealistic expectation that God is trustworthy thusallowing you to rest in Him and put your hope in Himregardlessofwhathappenstoyouinthefuture,whetheritbephysical,financial,relational,etc. However, is it possible that you have unrealisticexpectationsaboutGodbeingincontrolifyouhavesuch

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thoughtsas,“IfGodis incontrol,whydoesthisworldormy lifeormymarriage,etc. seemoutof control?” Ifyouthink God is not meeting your expectations concerningHis sovereignty, then the tendency will be to take backcontrol.Wheredoyouthinkthatwilllead?DoyouhavestruggleswithGod’ssovereignty?Howdoesit make you feel towards God or yourself if yourexpectations concerning His sovereignty have not beenmet?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)ArethereanyotherexpectationsthatyouhavewithGod’scharacterthathavenotbeenmet?Ifso,howdoesitmakeyoufeelthattheyhavenotbeenmet?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)2. Realistic and unrealistic expectations concerningGod’sPROMISES.Let’s lookata fewofGod’spromisesandsomeof theexpectationsassociatedwiththosepromises.a.GodwillHEALyouofyourwoundedness“Hehealsthebrokenheartedandbindsuptheirwounds.”

Psalm147:3 This is a wonderful promise of God. No matter howyou were wounded or the depth of your woundedness,God promises to heal. Because it is a promise we canexpectGodtokeepit.

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However,what if youdon’tbelieve thispromise.Youmightsay,“IcanneverbehealedbecauseofhowbadlyIwasabused.”Or “I feel responsible formywoundednessandbecauseof that, I amunworthyofbeinghealed.”Bythese statements aren’t you adopting unrealisticexpectationsaboutGod’sabilitytohealyou?Whatistheresult? You live in your woundedness and are neverhealed.If you struggle in this area, is God meeting yourexpectationsforhealing?Ifnot,howdoesitmakeyoufeeltowardsGod?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4) b.GodwillsetyouFREE.

“Andyouwillknowthetruth,andthetruthwill

setyoufree.”John8:32

“Jesus,saidtoHim,“Iamtheway,THETRUTH,andthelife…..”John14:6(Emphasismine)

Since every one of us is in bondage to something(primarilytoself),thenthisisawonderfulpromisefromtheLord.Asaresult,wecanexpecttheLordtomoveustowardsfreedom.However,anunrealisticexpectationisthatGodisgoingto totally set you free from all your strongholds, fleshlybehaviors, etc. The truth is that God may set youcompletely freeofsomethings.ButHemaynot freeyouof everything for several reasons: (1) your fleshlybehaviorsnever cease to exist; (2) thedepthof the grip

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they have on your life; or (3) He will allow an issue tocontinuebeingastruggleinordertokeepyoudependentonHim.Ifyoustruggleinthisarea,howdoesitmakeyoufeelthatGodhasnotmetyourexpectationsconcerningfreedom?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)c.GodwillTRANSFORMyou.

“Andwe,whowithunveiledfacesallreflecttheLord’sglory,arebeingtransformedintoHislikenesswithever-increasingglory,whichcomesfromtheLord,whoisthe

Spirit.”2Corinthians3:18The promise to transform you into the likeness ofChrist isoneofGod’skeypromises.Asa result, youcanrealistically expect God to transform you to think, feel,choose,behave,andbelievelikeJesus. However, inmy timeofministry I find that folksputunrealisticexpectationsonGod’stransformationprocess.Themostcommonunrealisticexpectation isaboutGod’stiming.Idon'tknowaboutyoubutIwanttransformationnow, not days, weeks, months or years from now. Godneverseemstomeetmytimetable.Howaboutyou? Here are some other unrealistic expectations I hearmostoften, “Iwant toknowhowGod isgoing tochangeme.”“Idon'twanttheretobeanypainorsufferinginthisprocess.” These expectations are unrealistic because God isnevergoingtotellusHis timetable.He isnevergoingto

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share with us His process of transformation and yes,there will be pain and suffering as part of thetransformationprocess.Ifyoustruggleinthisarea,howdoesitmakeyoufeelthatGodhasnotmetyourexpectations?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________What are some other areas that you have unmetexpectationsconcerningGod’snatureorHispromises?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________How does it make you feel about those unmetexpectations?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)

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CHAPTER THREE

Expectations About Yourself Concerning Your Christian Walk

Let me give you some examples of unrealisticexpectations that I have heard from Christians over theyears.Rememberasyoureadthissection,thatunrealisticexpectationsarethosethatdon’tlineupwithGod’struth.1.IfIamsaved,whydoIstillsin? What is the unrealistic expectation? That salvationshould eventually lead to a sinless life. Youmight drawthisconclusionwhenyoulookatRomans6:6:“…knowingthis,thatouroldselfwascrucifiedwithHim,inorderthatourbodyofsinmightbedoneawaywith,so

thatwewouldnolongerbeslavestosin.” However, even though the sin nature has beencrucified or done away with, we still have the fleshdwelling in us. Paul shares this truth in the followingverse:

“ForIknowthatnothinggooddwellsinme,thatis,inmyflesh;forthewillingispresentinme,butthedoingofthegoodisnot.ForthegoodthatIwant,Idonotdo,

butIpracticetheveryevilthatIdonotwant.”Romans7:18-19

The flesh is constantly drawing us to liveindependentlyofGod.Whenwegive into the flesh, thenwewill sin. The good news is that the longer youwalkmoreconsistentlyintheSpirit,thelessyouwillsin.

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If this expectation is something that you have struggledwith, how has it made you feel about yourself and/oryourChristianwalk?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)2.SinceIhavebeenlivinginChristforsomanyyears,whydoIstillstrugglewith ?TheunrealisticexpectationisthatthelongerIlivefromChristastheSourcethenatsomepointIshouldnolongerstrugglewithsomefleshlybehavior(s).LetmeusemyChristianwalktoanswerthisquestion.My core struggle in my Christian walk is feelings ofinadequacy.IhavebeenwalkinginChristsince1998andI still struggle with it. In the beginning, it wasoverwhelmingand it totallycontrolledmy life.However,thedifference is thatmy feelingsof inadequacynowaremorelikeacoldinthattheycomeandgoperiodicallybuttheynolongercontrolme. The good news is that as you increasingly live independence on Christ, your life is being transformedaccordingtoRomans12:2:

“Anddonotbenotconformedtothisworldbutbetransformedbytherenewingofyourmind….”

Being transformed means that it a LIFE LONG

PROCESS that will result in you struggling

LESS AND LESS with some fleshly behaviors.

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If this expectation is something that you have struggledwith, how has it made you feel about yourself and/oryourChristianwalk?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)3.Iwillfinallyarrivespiritually. Youmaybelieve that there issomesortof “spiritual”finish line that you can cross if you walk long enoughliving dependent on Christ. Some of the results I haveheardisthatifyoucrossthisfinishline,therewillbe:

• Completetransformation• Nomoreconflict.• Nomoresuffering.• Nomorestrugglewiththeflesh.

This isunrealisticbecause there isno spiritual finishline other than death. The truth is that living in a fallenworld and a fallen body surrounded by fallen peoplemeans there will always be a need for transformation;therewillbeconflictandsuffering;andtherewillalwaysbestruggleswiththeflesh.Thegoodnewsisthatinthemidstofthesethings,wecanlivewithChrist’speace,rest,confidence, joy,victory,etc.WeseethiswithPaulwhenhesays in2Corinthians12:10:

“ThereforeIamwellcontentwithweaknesses,withinsults,withdistresses,withpersecutions,withdifficulties,forChrist’ssake;forwhen

Iamweak,thenIamstrong.“

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Paulissayingthatthegreaterrealityforhimthanhisdistresses, persecutions, and difficulties is that he isexperiencingChrist’scontentment.

Therefore, there will be NO arrival this side of heaven,

but you can experience ALL that Christ has to offer (i.e.

His peace, rest, joy, etc. in spite of your struggles.

If this expectation is something that you have believed,howhasitmadeyoufeelaboutyourselforyourChristianwalk?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)

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CHAPTER FOUR

Expectations For Others Let’s look at how our expectations impact ourmarriages,families,friends,andco-workers.1.ExpectationsaboutyourSPOUSE/MARRIAGE. As I have discipled many married couples, I havefoundthatoneofthefoundationalissuesoftheirconflictisunmetexpectations.AsinourChristianlives,wecomeintomarriagewith realistic andunrealistic expectations.HerearetheonesthatIhearaboutmostoften:Myspouse: • Will make me fulfilled and happy. • Will love me unconditionally. • Will accept me unconditionally. • Will make me secure. If you had any of these expectations going intomarriage, have they been met so far? The truth is thatnone of these expectations is realistic because these areneedsthatonlyChristcanmeetnotyourspouse.Inotherwords, only Christ can love you and accept youunconditionally, and fulfill you andmake you secure.AsweliveinanabidingrelationshipwithChrist,thenwecanallowChristtomeetthoseneedsinusand,inturn,Hewillmeetourspouse’sneedsthroughus.However, if we believe that it is up to our spouse tomeet thoseneeds, thenweholdhim/herresponsible fordoingso.Iftheyfail(whichtheywill),thenourfleshsays,

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“I have the right to not love back or I have the right torejectmyspouse.” There can also be some unrealistic expectations thatseemrealisticbecausetheysoundbiblical.Herearesomeexamples:SincemyspouseandIarebothChristiansandareseekingtobeoneinChrist:

• Weshouldbegoingtothesamechurch.• Weshouldpraytogetherdaily.• Weshouldshareourstruggleswithoneanother.

Because they sound biblical, then we have an evengreater expectation that they should be met. Whathappensifexpectationslikethesearenotmet?Thinkaboutyourspouseandyourmarriageforamomentandanswerthefollowingquestion.Howdoesitmakeyoufeelwhenyourspousedoesnotmeetyourexpectations?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________(Choosefromthelistonpage4)2.ExpectationsaboutyourKIDS. We all have expectations about our kids. Somerealisticexpectationsare:

• Theywouldcometosalvation.• TheywouldunderstandChristastheirSource.• They would understand their true identity in

Christ.• TheywouldshareChristwithothers.

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ThesearerealisticinthatthisiswhattheLorddesiresfor all of us, i.e., it lines up with God’s truth. However,maybeyourkidsaregrownandnoneofthesedesireshasbeen fulfilled. One reaction may be that you condemnyourself fornotbeing abetterparent or fornotbeing amoreChrist-centeredparent.Perhaps you weren’t even a Christian while raisingyourkids.Whatiftheyarestillunbelieversasadults?Youcould have regrets because you had no chance to givethemthegospelwhentheywerechildren. Note: God created our children with free will. Thattheyhaven’tmetyourspiritualexpectationsdoesn’tmeanthatChrist isnotrespondingtoyourprayersorworkingontheirhearts.Nordoesitmeanthatyouhavefailedasaparent.Pleasetakeamomenttoanswerthisquestionaboutyourkids.Howdoesitmakeyoufeelifyourkidshavenotmetyourexpectations?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________2.ExpectationsaboutyourFRIENDS. Weall have friends andwith those friendships comeexpectations. For the most part, those expectationsincreasetheclosertherelationship.Forexample,youexpectaveryclosefriendtobemoretrustworthythana friendwhoisnotasclose.Youmighthave expectations that your close friends will beaccepting, honest, loving, caring, etc. (Especially if theyareChristians.)Theproblemsarisewhenyourfriendsfailto meet your expectations. What if you are vulnerable

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with your close friend about a very personal issue andthey end up rejecting you or condemning you orbetraying your confidences? How would that make youfeel? We can also put unrealistic expectations on ourrealisticones.BythisImean,thatwecanexpectnotonlytobeacceptedandlovedbyourChristianfriends,butwehave unrealistic expectations when we only want to beacceptedandlovedincertainways. If our friends don't measure up to our expectations,thenwemighttobecriticalorjudgmentalofthem.Whatif your friend offends you? This could produceunforgiveness and eventual bitterness towards thatfriend.Therefore, lookatyour friendships foramomentandanswerthisquestion.Howdoesitmakeyoufeelifyourfriends(formerfriends)havenot(didnot)metyourexpectations?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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CHAPTER FIVE

Other Expectations Wecanalsohaveexpectationsaboutour things suchasourjob,ourfinances,ourchurch,etc.ExpectationsAboutYourJobWhen it comes to your job, a realistic expectation isthat the Lord is going to provide. He says that He willmeet your needs in Philippians 4:19. However, we canhaveunrealisticexpectationsaboutourjobs,suchas:

• Iwillbesuccessful.• Iwillbesecure.• Iwillbepromoted.

What are some of your expectations concerning yourjob?Ifnoneoftheseexpectationsisbeingmet,howdoesitmake you feel? If you are inwhat you think is a deadendjob,howdoesthatmakeyoufeel?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ExpectationsAboutYourFinancesI believe all of us want to be financially secure.However,whatifyouhavebeenunabletoreachthatgoalsofar?Whatifyouhavehadtogobankrupt?Whatifyouare near retirement age and you realize that you don’thaveenoughmoneysavedtoretire?How does it make you feel if you have not met yourfinancialgoals?

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____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ExpectationsConcerningYourChurchWhen it comes to thechurchyouattend,doyouhavesomeunmetexpectations?Youmaynotlikethemusic,orthelengthofthepastor’ssermons.Ormaybeyougotoachurch that doesn't have the right programs or a goodchildren’s ministry. Or the leadership is more business-oriented than spiritually-oriented. I think we all haveexpectationsforourchurch.Thinkaboutthisforamoment:

If your expectations about your church

DON’T line up with God’s plan can they be

REALISTIC expectations?

ThetruthisthatGodhasaplanforyourchurch.Hehascalled you to that church to fulfillHisplan.Therefore, ifyour expectations don't line upwith His plan then theyareunrealisticexpectations. I have discovered over the years that I have a lot ofopinions aboutmy church but the Lord has toldme onmanyoccasionsthatifmyopinionsorexpectationsdon'tlineupwithHiswill,thenHeisnotinterestedinthem.How does it make you feel towards your church whenyourexpectationsarenotmet?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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CHAPTER SIX

The Results of Your Unmet Expectations

Satan’s Strategies Concerning Your Unmet Expectations

TheResultsofYourUnmetExpectationsThereareanumberofresultsofunmetexpectationsbutIwantustofocusontwokeypoints.1. Unresolved unmet expectations lead to FLESHLYBEHAVIORS.Takeamomentandlookoveryourresponsestoallthecategories of expectations thatwe previously discussed.Whatweresomeofthewordsyouusedtodescribehowyou felt about your unmet expectations: Perplexed?Frustrated? Inadequate? Rejected? Here is the keyquestionconcerningyourunmetexpectations:

Whatwillbetheresultsifyoufailtodealwiththosefeelings?

There is nothing wrong with feeling any of thesethings concerning our unmet expectations becauseemotionsarepartofourhumanmakeup.However,ifwelet those feelings linger and do not engage God to dealwiththemthiswillbetheresult:

FLESHLY BEHAVIORS towards God, yourself,

others, and your Christian walk.

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Let me explain by giving examples from each of thecategories we have discussed concerning unmetexpectations.a.UnmetexpectationsconcerningGod’scharacter.

Let’sassumethatyouarestrugglingwithbelievingthatGodlovesyouunconditionallyregardlessofwhatyoudoordon’tdo.You feelunworthyofHis love and concludethat youmustwork harder forHim to earnHis love. Atsomepoint,allyourdoingdoesn’tseemtobeenoughandyou get angry with yourself and/or you get angry withGod.Are you experiencing any fleshly behaviors associatedwith your unmet expectations concerning God’scharacter?b.UnmetexpectationsconcerningGod’spromises. Let’s assume that you are frustrated by God’stransformation process. If your frustration is not dealtwiththenyoubegintodoubtGod’sabilityorwillingnesstotransformyourlife.Asthedoubtincreases,yougettoapointwhereyougiveuponGodeverbeingabletochangeyou.Are you experiencing any fleshly behaviors associatedwith your unmet expectations concerning God’spromises?c. Unmet expectations concerning your Christianwalk. Let’s assume that you expected to be totally free ofyouranxietybecauseofhowlongyouhavebeenwalking

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dependent on Christ. However, since you are stillstrugglingwith it, you begin towonder if you are doingsomething wrong or if you need to do something elseotherthancontinuingtodependonGodtosetyoufree.If this feeling goes unchecked, then you becomefrustratedtowardsGodand/oryourself.Theresultisthatyoustartusingyourself-effortandself-disciplineto freeyourself of your anxiety and you become stuck in ananxietytrap.Are you experiencing any fleshly behaviors associatedwithyourunmetexpectationsconcerningyourChristianwalk?d.Unmetexpectationsconcerningyourmarriage. Let’s assume that your spouse is not meeting yourexpectationsinaffirmingyou.Asaresult,youstartfeelingrejected.Asyourrejectiongrows,youbegintofeelangrywhicheventuallyleadstobitternesstowardsyourspouse.Are you experiencing any fleshly behaviors associatedwithyourunmetexpectationsconcerningyourmarriage?e.UnmetexpectationsconcerningyourjobLet’sassumethathaveworkedharderthanyourpeerstoearn a promotion. Youwalk intowork one day, only todiscover that someone less qualified got the promotion.Your frustration turns to angerwith the result that youbecome vindictive towards the person who waspromoted.Are you experiencing any fleshly behaviors associatedwithyourunmetexpectationsconcerningyourjob?

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f.Unmetexpectationsconcerningyourchurch Let’s assume that you are not happy with the newdirectionofthechurchbecauseyourexpectationwasthatitwouldcontinuegoinginthesamedirection.Youbeginto be frustrated with the leadership and this leads totelling others of your displeasure. As you find morepeopletoagreewithyouthiseventuallyleadstodivisionwithinthechurch.Are you experiencing any fleshly behaviors associatedwithyourunmetexpectationsconcerningyourchurch?Ihopetheseexampleshavehelpeduncoversomefleshlybehaviors that you are experiencing concerning yourexpectations. Let’s now take a look at some of Satan’sstrategiesconcerningyourunmetexpectations.2. Unresolved fleshly behaviors can lead to fleshlySTRONGHOLDS. If the fleshly behaviors associated with your unmetexpectations are not dealt with they can lead tostrongholds.Isimplydefineastrongholdlikethis:

A stronghold is a REINFORCED flesh pattern or

behavior that has a very strong GRIP on your life.

Forexample,yourexpectation is thatyourspousewillbe affirming. However, he/she is not meeting yourexpectation with the result that resentment begins tobuildupinyourheart.Ifthatresentmentisnotdealtwiththenthatresentmentcaneventuallybecomeastrongholdofbitterness.

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Satan’sSTRATEGIESandYourUnmetExpectationsAswewellknow,thethree-foldstrategyoftheenemyis to steal, kill, and destroy yourwalkwith Christ (John10:10).Heaccomplishesthisprimarilyintwoways:1.His strategy isprimarily carriedout throughyourTHOUGHTS. SinceSatancaninsertthoughtsintoourminds,hewillinsert deceiving, tempting, and condemning thoughts.Let’s lookathowhe inserts thoughts to tie inwithyourunmetexpectations.a. Inserting thoughts in yourmind that are in FIRSTperson.Thekey truth to rememberconcerningSatanandyourthoughtlifeisthis:

When Satan INSERTS thoughts into your

mind, they are always in FIRST person.

For example, let’s assume that your expectation foryourspousetoloveyouunconditionallyisnotbeingmet.Itisbecomingarealsourceoffrustration.IfSataninsertsa thought, it won’t be “You are frustrated with yourspouse.”Rather,itwillbeinfirstperson:“Iamfrustratedwithmyspouse.”YoumaythinkthatthoughtcamefromyouwheninfactitwasSatan that inserted that thought.Therefore, Satancandeceiveusintobelievingthathisthoughtsareyours.

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a. Inserting thoughts in your mind that REINFORCEyourfeelingsaboutyourunmetexpectations. Let’s assume that you are discouraged because youhavebeenlivingdependentonChristbutyouhavenotyetbeen able to forgive the person that abused you. Youmightbethinking,“WhenisGodgoingtosetmefreefrommyunforgivenesstowardsthisperson?” Satan will insert parallel thoughts to reinforce yourdiscouragement. Thoughts such as, “I am gettingfrustrated because God is not coming through,” or “IwonderifGodreallywantsmetobesetfree.” This strategy is like a fumble in football. Everyonegoes after the ball and piles on one another. Similarly,Satanwantstopile liesonbyinsertingmanyreinforcingnegativethoughtsonyou.2.SatanworksincooperationwithyourFLESH.

Satan knows that your flesh is the gateway todefeating you. He also has a history of all your fleshlytendenciessinceyourbirth.Therefore,hewillalwaysbeexploiting your flesh when it comes to your unmetexpectations.For example, let’s assume that you struggle withrejection.Youjustfoundoutyourbestfriendwastalkingaboutyoubehindyourback.Yourexpectationisthatyoucould trust your friend to keep your confidences. Youimmediatelyfeelrejected.Satan,knowingyourweakness,will insertmultiple thoughts tostirupyour feelingsandencourageyoutoreactintheflesh.

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Satan might insert thoughts such as, “I can’t believemybestfriendwoulddothat.Iwillnevertrustmyfriendagain.”Asaconsequence,youlookforwaystoretaliateorrejectyourfriend.3.SatanworksthroughyourUNBELIEF.Satan has a good understanding of what you believeandwhatyoudon’t.Therefore,hewillworkagainstyouby working through your unbelief. One of Satan’s mainstrategiesistogetyoutodoubtGod’scharacter. For example, you know, because the Bible says itseveral times, thatyouare righteous inChrist aspartofyour true identity. However, because of your fleshlybehavior, you struggle with believing that you arerighteous.Therefore,theenemy,knowingyourstruggle,mayinsertthoughts like this, “I can’t be righteous because I justlooked at pornography,” or “How could I be righteousbecauseofwhatIjustdid?”Therefore, be aware that the enemy has one objectivewhenitcomestoyourunmetexpectations:

To turn you AWAY from God and turn you back to

your FLESH to deal with your unmet expectations.

IhopethissectionhasbeenhelpfulinseeingtheresultsofyourunmetexpectationsaswellasSatan’sstrategiestokeepyouinbondagetoyourflesh.Inthislastchapter,wewill look at key truths of engaging God for Him to dealwithourunmetexpectations.

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CHAPTER SEVEN

Engaging God To Deal With Unmet Expectations

Introduction Thetruthisthatwearenevergoingtogetawayfromexpectations, even unrealistic ones. Whether they arerealisticorunrealistic,expectationsareapartoflife.Theproblemcomeswhen theyareunmetbecause theyhavethecapabilityofproducingshortandlongtermdamagetoour soul, to our walk in Christ and to our relationshipwithGod.Inordertoavoidthat,let’slookatsomekeytruthsthatwe can use to engage God to deal with the fleshlythoughts and feelings that result from our unmetexpectations.EngagingGodToDealWithUnmetExpectations1.TakecaptivetheTHOUGHTorFEELINGassociatedwiththeunmetexpectationIMMEDIATELY.“We are destroying speculations and every lofty thingraisedupagainsttheknowledgeofGod,andwearetakingevery thought captive to the obedience of Christ.” 2Corinthians10:5 Ioftenaskthequestion,“Doyouthinkaboutwhatyouthinkabout?”IgetpuzzledlookswhenIaskthatquestionbecause for themostpartwedon’t thinkaboutwhatwearethinking.Wesimplyletthosethoughtsintoourmindswithoutquestioningthem.

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Can you imagine living in a heavily crime-riddenneighborhoodanddecidingtotakeyourfrontdooroffthehinges and put it in the garage. You now have noprotection from anyone who wants to come into yourhome. Of course you would not do that because it is acrazythingtodo. However, I see many Christians who have done justthat with the door to their minds. They have taken thedooroff thehinges andwelcomeanyandevery thoughtintotheirminds. When the initial thought or feeling associated withyourunmetexpectationcomesup,thetendencyistoletitautomatically intoyourmindand thenstartdwellingonit. Forexample, ifyoufeltrejectedinsomewaybyyourspouse because they didn’t trust you with the finances,what do you think would be the result if you let thatthought into yourmind and continued to dwell on thatfeelingofrejection? ThisiswhyPaulemphasizestheimportanceoftakingeverythoughtcaptive.Therefore,let’sputthedoortoourmind back on it’s hinges, install a deadbolt, and apeepholeandstarttakingeverythoughtcaptive. HerearethreespiritualexercisesthatIhopewillhelpinyoutakingyourthoughtscaptive:a.QuestiontheORIGINofyourthoughts Insteadoftakingownershipofthatthoughtorfeeling,standbackfromitandaskthequestion:“Wheredidthat

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thought or feeling come from? The flesh, Satan, or theHolySpirit?” For the most part, the origin of the thought will beobvious but by asking the question you delay reactingimmediatelytoyourflesh.Forexample, let’sassumethatyouhavebeen faithfulinprayingforyourspouse’ssalvationforsometime.WeknowthatbecauseGodwantsalltobesavedthatthisisarealisticexpectation.However,afterall thetimespentinprayer,he/shehasyettoacceptChrist.Athoughtcomestomind like this, “Does God really care if my spouse issavedornot.Whywon’tHeanswermyprayers?”Insteadofdwellingonthatthought,thinkaboutwherethat thoughtcamefrom.Goingback tomydooranalogy,instead of opening the doorwhen someone knocks, youfirstlookthroughthepeepholeandseewhoitis.Itisthesame with your mind. Before opening the door, askyourselforGodwherethatthoughtiscomingfrom.

Since our flesh is always ready to quickly REACT, it

is ESSENTIAL to question every thought and feeling.

b.COMPAREyourthoughtorfeelingwithGod’struth. Inaddition toquestioning theoriginof the thought, Ibelieve the second most critical thing we can do iscomparethatthoughtorfeelingwithGod’struth. I call this using your “spiritual” peephole becausebeforeIentertainthatthought,Iamgoingtoseeifthatit

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linesupwithGod’struth.Ifitdoesn’t,thenIamgoingtorejectit.Ifitdoes,thenIwillopenthedoorandletitin. For example, your expectation was that you weregoing tobepromotedatyour job.However,youwalk intheofficeonedayonlytofindoutthatsomeoneelsewaspromotedoveryou.Thefirstthoughtsthatcometomindare,“Iworkedhardforthispromotion.Ideserveit.SinceIdidn'tgetit,Ihavetherighttogetangry.”Comparingthosethoughtswiththetruth.Inthatsameexample, before entertaining that thought and gettingangry,compareittoGod’struth.ThetruthisthatGoddidnot guarantee you a promotion. You did not get thepromotionbecauseGod inHis sovereigntydidnotallowit. However, since God is good and He is for you thenthere was a good reason why God didn’t allow it.Therefore,youdon'thavetherighttogetangry. Therefore, always use your “spiritual” peephole toquestionwhetherornotthosethoughtsandfeelingslineupwithGod’struth. Think about an unmet expectation and the associatedfleshly thoughts and feelings. Write down God’s truthconcerningthosethoughtsandfeelings.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________c. SPEAK God’s TRUTH into that fleshly thought orfeeling. I don't know if you are familiar with the term“spiritualself-talk.”IdefineitasspeakingGod’struthintoafleshlythoughtorfeeling.Itcanbespeakingthatoccurs

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onlyinyourmindorspeakingGod’struthoutloud.Ihavefoundthisveryeffectiveindisarmingfleshlythoughts. Forexample,youarestrugglingwithGodbeinggoodbecauseyouhavebeenfaithfulinseekingHimtosetyoufree from your long-held fears but you are notexperiencing any change. As a result of that unmetexpectation, thoughts start coming into yourmind suchas, “God promised to set me free. Why am I notexperiencing any freedom? If He were a good God, HewouldhonorHispromises.” Speakingthetruth.Spiritualself-talkinthisexamplemight sound like this: “The truth is that God isworkingbecause that is the promise of Philippians 1:6. Eventhough I am not experiencing any change, by faith IbelievethatHeissettingmefree.ThetruthisthatGodisgood regardless of whether or not He has met myexpectations. Therefore, I will continue towalk by faithandtrustthatHeissettingmefree.” DoyouseehowquicklyspeakingGod’struthintothisissue might defuse that fleshly thought or feeling? Self-talk issomethingthatIuseall thetimetokeepmefromtakingownershipofmyfleshlythoughts.Using the unmet expectation you used from the lastsection,speakGod’struththatyouwrotedownintothosefleshlythoughtsandfeelings.Whatwouldyousay?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________d.ENTRUSTthatthoughtand/orfeelingtoGod.LetmesharewithyouhowIdefinetheword“entrust”asitrelatestoexpectations

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ENTRUST:

GIVING OVER to God your fleshly

thoughts and feelings associated with your

unmet expectations.

Think of your fleshly thoughts as a piece of burningcharcoal. If you pick up that piece of charcoal, what isgoingtohappenifyoudon’tdropitimmediately?Secondand thirddegreeburns.The same is trueofyour fleshlythoughtsandfeelings.Youcan’taffordtoholdontothembecause theyhave thepotential of creating thirddegreeburns in your soul (i.e. ongoing fleshly thoughts andfeelings).Thinkaboutthesetworeasonswhyyoushouldentrustyour fleshly thoughts and feelings toGod.One reason isthat you are not capable of dealingwith those thoughtsapartfromGodandHispower.Secondly,byimmediatelyentrusting those thoughts to Him you have given Godownershipofthosethoughts.WhathappenswhenyouentrustthosethoughtstoGod?Herearesome things Ihaveexperiencedwhen IentrustmyfleshlythoughtstoGod:

• Heinsertstruthfulthoughtsintomymind.• HeusesHispower tokeepmyeyes fixedonHim

and His truth versus taking ownership of myfleshlythoughts.

• IenterintoChrist’speaceandrestbecauseIamnolonger holding onto those fleshly thoughts andfeelings.

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Letmeuseanexampletoillustrate.Ihadaclosefriendwho said some things aboutme that were very painful.Hisremarkswereasubtleattackonmyintegrityandmyheart.Inthatmoment,IfeltrejectedandIbelievedIhadtherighttodefendmyself. Inthepast,thereisnodoubtthatIwouldhavelashedoutatmyfriend.However,inthissituationdependingonGod’s power, I immediately entrusted those thoughts toGod.Asaresult,Ididn'trespondnegativelytomyfriendsinceIwasabletocomparewhathesaidtothetruthandchoosenottodefendmyself.Using the unmet expectation you used from the lastsection,what fleshlythoughtsor feelingsdoyouneedtoentrusttoGod?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________FinalExampleForTakingThoughtsCaptive. Let me use one example that incorporates the fourprinciplesthatwejustdiscussed. Let’ssayyouhavea lovedonethat isdyingofcancerandyouhavebeenpraying forhealing.AssumethatyouhaveanexpectationthatGod,beinggoodand incontrol,willsavehim/herfromdying.Yourlovedonediesandinthat momentangerbeginstowellup inyourheart.Youbegin having these thoughts, “God did not answer myprayer. I really expected thatGodwas going to savemylovedone.Hecan’tletthishappenandcallHimselfgood.”

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Question the thoughts: “Was that thought from theSpiritorwasitfrommyfleshorSatan?”Compare those thoughtswith the truth: The truth isthat God’s goodness is not based on circumstances thatGod allows or does not allow. Our days are numberedaccording to theLordandHehas theright todeterminethetimeforyourlovedonetobewithHim.Speaktruthintoyourfleshlythoughts:“WhileIgrieveoverthelossofmylovedone,IknowthatGod’stimingisperfect. I was faithful in praying but God’s will mustprevail.EntrustingyourfleshlythoughtsandfeelingstoGod:“Therefore,IamentrustingmyangryfeelingstoGodandIam choosing to believe that He is good and that I don'thave to get angry.” Remember that feelings can’t beturnedoffinstantaneously,butasyoucontinuetoentrustthemtoGod,theywillsubside. I hope this section on taking your thoughts/feelingscaptivewill help you practically in engagingGod’s truthandpowertodealwithyourunmetexpectations.Thereisanother truth that Iwould like to share that I trustwillhelpyouindealingwithunmetexpectations.2. PUT TO DEATH or MOVE AWAY FROM yourunrealisticexpectations“…forifyouarelivingaccordingtotheflesh,youmust

die;butifbytheSpirityouareputtingtodeaththedeedsofthebody,youwilllive.”Romans8:13

ThereissomethingmoreGodwantstodoinyouinthelongtermconcerningyourunrealisticexpectations.

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God eventually wants you to DIE TO or MOVE AWAY

FROM having UNREALISTIC expectations.

That is what part of the meaning of the verse abovewhenitsays,“…puttingtodeaththedeedsoftheflesh.”Inthis passage, putting to death the deeds of the bodyincludes your unrealistic expectations. How do we dothis? There are three truths to consider in answering thatquestion.a.LEARN/KNOWGod’struth.

“I have not written to you because you do not know the truth, but because you do know it, and because

no lie is of the truth.” 1 John 2:21 The first key step in dying to your unrealisticexpectationsistolearn/knowGod’struth.Bylearningthetruth,youcancompareittoyourexpectationsandrealizewhen they truly are unrealistic. However, we learnedearlierthatlearningthetruthisnotthesameasbelievingthetruth.Therefore,youneedto:b.SeektheSpirittorenewyourmindtoBELIEVEthetruth.“InHim,youalso,afterlisteningtothemessageoftruth,thegospelofyoursalvation—havingalsobelieved,you

weresealedinHimwiththeHolySpiritofpromise.”Ephesians1:13

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OnlytheHolySpiritcantakeHistruthandtransformitintopersonalrevelationforyou.HeistheonlyOnewhocanmoveyou fromunbelief tobelief.Therefore, ask theSpirittorenewyourmindandtransformittobelieveHistruth.c.ChoosetoWALKinthetruth.

“I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth.” 3 John 4

Even though you know the truth and believe the truth, you still need to choose to walk in the truth. Truth and belief will do you no good unless you choose to act on them. Letmeshareapersonaltestimonytoaffirmthesethreepoints. When I got married, I wanted to be acceptedunconditionally.Myexpectationwas thatmywifewouldnotonlybeunconditionallyacceptingbutthatshewouldacceptme in specificways.When thatdidnothappen, Iwouldgetveryfrustratedandlookforwaystorejecther. However, as I grew up in Christ and His truth, Ilearned that only Christ can truly meet that need ofunconditional acceptanceaccording toRomans15:7andPhilippians4:19.OnceIlearnedthetruth,Ibeganseekingthe Holy Spirit to renew my mind to this truth and tobringmetoaplacewhereIwouldbeginbelievingit.Over time, as the Spirit persuaded me of the truth, Ibeganchoosingtowalkinthattruth.ThisresultedinmybeingabletoseekandfindmyacceptanceinChristratherthanfrommywife.

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Therefore, putting to DEATH your unrealistic

expectations will result from LEARNING, BELIEVING, and CHOOSING to walk in the truth.

FinalTruthsAboutUnmetExpectations1.TheHoly Spiritwill ALWAYSbe speaking truth toyouwhenyouaretemptedtotakeownershipofyourfleshlythoughtsandfeelings. In the very moment that you are tempted to act onyour fleshly feelings arising out of your unmetexpectations,theHolySpiritwillbringHistruthtomind.WeseethisinthefirstpartofJohn16:13:

“ButwhenHe,theSpiritoftruth,comes,Hewillguideyouintoallthetruth….”John16:13

The truth is that the Holy Spirit is alwayscommunicatingwithus.Thequestionis,arewelisteningforHis voice? I have never heard an audible voice fromtheSpiritbutHedoesspeaktomeprimarilybythoughts.In that moment, when I am tempted to act on myfleshly feelings, I need to stop and listen because theSpiritisgivingmethetruththatIneedinordertobeabletocombattheflesh.

Therefore, begin developing the HABIT of

listening for the Holy Spirit.

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2.TherewillALWAYSbeaBATTLEwithyourunmetexpectations.“ForthefleshsetsitsdesireagainsttheSpirit,andtheSpiritagainsttheflesh;fortheseareinoppositiontooneanother,sothatyoumaynotdothethingsthatyouplease.”

Galatians5:17 I believe that similar to our lifetime battle with theflesh, battling with our unmet expectations extendsthroughoutourlife. The good news is that not only will your unrealisticexpectationsdecreaseasyougrowinChrist,butyouwillincreasingly not take ownership of your fleshlythoughts/feelings whether they are triggered by eitherrealisticorunrealisticexpectations. I saw this truth played out with a couple I wasworkingwith.Thehusbandwantedhiswifetopraywithhim.Earlyonwhensherefused,itwouldmakehimangryand he would respond with self-righteous remarks like“God isnot going toblessourmarriage ifwedon'tpraytogether;”or“Howcanweexpecttogrowspirituallyifwedon't pray together?” His anger and self-righteousnesscreatedrealstrifeovertime. Ashebegan to learnaboutdying tohisexpectations,insteadofgettingangry,hebegangivinggracetohiswifeby not continuing to give her a hard time about it andeventually,hestoppedbringingthesubjectup.Rather,hebegan praying that the Lord would change her heartaboutprayingtogether.Sometimelater,shecametohimandwaswillingtopraywithhim.

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3.Ifyouhaveallowedyourfleshlyresponsestoyourunmet expectations become STRONGHOLDS then itmaytaketimetobesetfree. If we don't engage God to deal with our fleshlyresponses concerning our unmet expectations, they can,overtimebecomestrongholds.Ifthathappens,dependingon thegrip thatstrongholdhasonyou, itmay take timefortheLordtosetyoufreefromthatstronghold.Letmegiveyouanexampletoillustrate.AmanIwasministeringtosharedwithmethathelosthisfiancéetoadrunkdriverthenightbeforetheyweretobemarried.Thisbegana15yearjourneyofhisbelievingthat Godwas not good resulting in his hatred of God. Ithought that because of such a painful event that hewouldneverseethegoodnessofGod. However,ashebeganlearningwhatitmeanttowalkinChrist,InoticedthatgraduallyhisattitudetowardGodwas changing. Itwas truly supernatural because he hadbuilt a 15 year case for hating God. After we had beentogetherforoverayear,hebegansharingwithmeabouthowmuch God loves him. This led to his believing thatGodhadadivinepurposeinhisfiancéedying.FinalThoughts WatchingGodworkinthisman’sheartreallybroughthometomewhatJesussaidinMark10:27:“Lookingatthem,Jesussaid,“Withpeopleitisimpossible,butnotwithGod;forallthingsarepossiblewithGod.“

Ithinkthiswouldbeagoodversetoendthisstudyon.The truth is that we will continue to have realistic and

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unrealistic expectations. We will continue to battle thefleshly thoughts and feelings that go along with them.However, the goodnews is thatwe have theGod of theimpossible who will teach us, transform us, and be ourfreedom and victory over all our unmet expectations.Thatshouldgiveyougreathope.WouldYouLikeToKnowMore? Wouldyouliketoknowmoreaboutthesubjectofthisbooklet? If so I would encourage you to read ourcurriculum called,LivingLifeFromANewSource. In it, Icoverthefollowingtopics:

• WhatisGod’spartin

livingTHEChristianlife?

• WhatisyourpartinlivingTHEChristianlife?

• HowtoengageGodtobetransformed.

• Whatdoesatransformedlifelooklike?

Othercurriculumweofferthataddressexpectations:

• KeyToAChrist-CenteredMarriage• HealingTheWoundedHeart

• TheBattleofTheMind

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These curricula are available on my website(www.christislifeministries.com). Online, you mayeither download each curriculum for free or purchase awrittencopyof itwhichwillbemailedtoyou.Therearealsovideolessonsonthewebsitethatgowithsomeofthecurricula that you can eitherwatch for free or purchaseonDVD. I hope you will take advantage of these studies andseektheLordforadeeperunderstandingofHistruth.Blessings in Christ, Bill Loveless

P.S., Ifyouhaveany thoughtsconcerningwhatyouhaveread thatyouwould like to shareorhaveanyquestionsaboutwhatIhavewritten,pleaseemailmeattheaddressbelow:

Christ Is Life Ministries

Website: www.christislifeministries.com

Email: [email protected]

(1-1-17)

For further information, see the ministrywebsite at: www.christislifeministries.com For further information, see the ministrywebsite at: www.christislifeministries.com For further information, see the ministrywebsite at: www.christislifeministries.com
































What did you Expect?





What did you Expect?...2017/01/01 · You have expectations about every area of your life:...

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