Web viewThe terms of the treaty were that North Vietnam would end their involvement in Laos and that...

LAOTIAN EMIGRATION: AN UNTOLD STORY OF SEARCHING FOR A PLACE TO CALL HOME

SABRINA PHANSAMARY BALDWIN COLLEGE

Figure 1 Virath Family, 1979

I remember back in fifth grade, my teacher told us to make a family tree and to make a presentation of how our families settled in America. Since most of the students in my class were predominately of Dutch origin, they shared a similar story different from my own. When I looked over to see my classmate’s family tree, I was shocked to see branches and branches of generations, but when I looked at mine, it was a sapling compared to theirs. My sapling only went as far back to my grandparents and ended with me. During our presentations, each of my classmates shared their story of how their

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Virginia Review of Asian StudiesVolume 16 (2014): 116-130Phansa: Laotian Emigration

ancestors settled in our little homey town of Holland, Michigan. Each story was as similar to the next in that their ancestors left the Netherlands to come to America. Because of our age at the time, we could not comprehend the reasons why they came over to America. When it was my turn to present, I was embarrassed at how miniscule my sapling was compared to their great oak trees. While they shared their elaborate history dating back to the 1800s, the ten-year-old me could only say that my grandparents along with their children came to America from Thailand in the late 1970s.

Thinking back to our fifth grade presentations of how we arrived to this point, I could not help but wonder the reasons why people would uproot themselves to go to a land that is alien to them. To answer the questions floating around my head as to why families would uproot themselves from their homeland to go to a foreign country is because of the events that led them to believe that their own country had become un-livable and that the only way to survive is to leave their home behind. If the situation back home was where everyone was happy, there would be no reason to leave. While my classmates’ ancestors reasons for leaving their home was based on poor economic conditions during earlier times in Europe, my family’s rationale was to escape from a bloody civil war and political prosecution1. Although both differ in their reasoning, they share a similar goal. Immigration is used as an escape from a country in turmoil, but there is more to that notion. The whole process is about creating a new and more fulfilling life for the family and securing a brighter future for their children.

When thinking about my family’s decision as to why they came to America, the situation was more complicated in that instead of financial reasons, they fled their country Laos as a means of survival. In the Failed State Index (FSI), an index that indicates a country’s state of vulnerability, Laos is in the warning list of states that may fail.2 Laos is a country full of political instability due to corrupt government officials and poor macroeconomic policies. To understand where the disparity within the country came from, one must look into the past to see the initial start of it all.

Background History

Even before Laos’ descent into chaos in the early 1960s, the country was divided between two prominent competing ideals. The traditional view, the royalist side, was to maintain the status quo while the new revolutionary view, Pathet Lao, was to get rid of the traditional ideas and raise a new form of government. The revolutionaries wanted to create a socialist government and to move Laotian Society away from its traditional past. The reason for the disparity within the country could be found in the division of the royal family. Prince Boun Oum of Champassak (1912-1980) held the right wing view of

1 Swierenga, Robert P., Dr. "'By the Sweat of our Brow:' Economic Aspects of the

Dutch Immigration to Michigan." Lecture presented at A.C. Van Raalte Institute for Historical Studies, Holland Museum Sesquicentennial Lecture Series, Hope College, Holland, MI, March 13, 1997. 2 The Fund for Peace. "The Failed State Index." Fund For Peace. Last modified 2013. Accessed March 3, 2014. http://ffp.statesindex.org/rankings.

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continuing France’s involvement with Laos. Prince Souphanouvoung (1909-1995) held the far left wing view of expelling French influence within the country. French held Laos as a protectorate for over fifty years. What I found to be strange was that even under French leadership, the country was still underdeveloped compared to their neighbors such

as Vietnam, which was also a French protectorate. France imposed an assimilation program in Vietnam during their occupation and the country steadily developed because without education, there is no room for growth. With Laos, however, France’s interest in the country was not as high as shown in Vietnam. France took Laos on a whim for their own imperialistic pride. Realistically, Laos held very little economic importance to France due to the country being landlocked. Because they did not regard Laos as being as important to them as Vietnam, the French did not enforce a strong assimilation program in Laos as they did in Vietnam. To make matters even more problematic, the highlander or hill people in Laos were isolated from the rest of the country, thereby making assimilation difficult.

Fortunately for the rest of the country, most were able to receive a basic education under French rule,3 but because of the lack of a nationwide education distribution, Laos was not able to advance forward as a nation compared to its neighbors.

Prince Souphanouvoung, with the support of the Ho Chi Minh (1890-1969), the leader of communist Vietnam, created the Pathet Lao, or Lao National Movement in the 1950s, to challenge French and Royalist ideals with communism as its platform and guerilla warfare as his tool. After France lost control of Vietnam to communist forces, they began to withdraw troops from the region, Laos included. Fearing the spread of communism, the United States began to fill the void left by France by supporting the Royal Lao Government (RLG). Due to President John F. Kennedy’s (1917-1963) reluctance to involve the United States into the affairs in Southeast Asia, he avoided the region altogether. In 1964, after the Kennedy Assassination, President Lyndon B.

3 Smith, Roger M. Governments and Politics of Southeast Asia. 2nd ed. Ithaca, NY: Cornell University Press, 1964.

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Figure 2 Map of Laos <http://www.tourisminindochina.com/laos/image-laos/LaosMap.gif>


Johnson (1908-1973), gave the green light to begin covert operations within the region. The goal of this “secret war” was to deny North Vietnamese supplies from Laos and stop the country from falling into communism.

What is known as the “Secret War” involved CIA operatives training, arming, and coordinating the Royal Lao Army against the Pathet Lao and North Vietnamese forces. Even though this war was considered a secret, millions of tons of explosives were dropped on Laos; more than the bombs dropped on Germany and Japan during World War II combined. This amounts to an equivalent a bombing run every nine minutes for twenty-four hours for ten years straight. CIA operatives coordinated strikes against communist forces while pilots returning from Vietnam were encouraged to dump leftover bombs in Laos.4

In 1973, due to mounting pressure at home, President Richard Nixon (1913-1994)

negotiated a peace treaty between North Vietnam and the United States. The terms of the treaty were that North Vietnam would end their involvement in Laos and that the Pathet Lao and RLG were to cooperate within the government. Unfortunately, North Vietnamese troops continued supporting Pathet Lao after the treaty. Two years after the end of American support, the balance of power shifted to the Pathet Lao.5 The RLG, foreseeing their inevitable defeat without Western support, ended the civil war by giving in to Pathet Lao demands. The aftermath of the conflict resulted in a war-orn country and an estimated 70,000 lives. I asked my grandfather if he could remember any battles during the time and with one look at his pain stricken eyes, my heart froze. “What happened in the past must stay in the past. These memories are too painful for you [kids] to remember too. I don't want you to know about this, I’ll take it to my grave if I have to.”

My Family’s Decision to Leave Laos

People emigrate from their country when they deem their home to be unlivable. Like other Royalists, Thongsay Virath (1932), my grandfather from my mother’s side, foresaw his country to be unlivable for his family and resolved to escape. The decision to leave the country he had faithfully served for nearly twenty-five years was difficult to make. As crestfallen as he was to make the decision, he knew in his heart that leaving the country was necessary for securing a better future for his family. If he had made the decision to stay in the country, the communists would have eventually found him and killed him. Even if they have not killed

4 No Reservations. "No Reservations: Laos." Travel Channel. March 4, 2014 (originally aired July 7, 2008). Hosted by Anthony Bourdain. 5 Dee, Ivan R. The Hidden History of the Vietnam War. Chicago, IL: John Prados, 1995.

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Figure 3 Thongsay Virath, 1956

him, remaining in the country meant continuing a life without hope for his family. Leading a life with no hope is life not worth living.

My grandfather is a man who came from humble origins. He was born into a family of seven children in 1928. When he was seven years old, his parents sent him to school in Thailand. Because of his stay in Thailand, he was able to achieve citizenship. However in 1947, he returned to Laos to join the military. Through his hard work and determination he rose through the ranks up to a leadership position of first lieutenant in the military. My grandfather was proud to serve under the Royal Lao Army. In 1956, he was sent to Thailand for more training. His skills impressed the King of Thailand so much that he was personally given a sword as well as the promotion to first lieutenant in the Royal Lao Army. During the 1960s when the United States carried out their operations in the region, CIA operatives’ handpicked my grandfather and a few others to come to the United States for training. My grandfather traveled to the United States for training twice. The first time he was sent in 1967 to Fort Benning in Georgia and then a year later to Fort Knox in Kentucky. His trainings, however, were designed to help him train the Royal Lao Army back home. Without the army, however, he would not have been able to meet the love of his life either.

One day while traveling through the countryside with his squad, he came across a beautiful young village woman. When I questioned my grandfather about his first impression of my grandmother, he told me, “The first time I saw her, I knew she was the woman I was going to marry.”

When he first came back to Lao to join the military, my grandfather was sent to Vietnam for two years to fight in the first Indochina War. He spent his first year in what was then the French Indochina capital of Hanoi and another year in Pinang. He returned from Vietnam and kept to his word to marry my grandmother, Nontha (1938). They have been married for nearly sixty years and from the way I see my grandfather look at my grandmother, his love for her still remains. He showed his undeniable love by fathering their eleven children; Pradith(1959), Phonesavanh(1960), Phankham(1961), Manivanh(1965), Sounanhdone (1967),

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Figure 4 Thongsay and Nontha Virath, 1980s


Thongxay(1969), Phayboune(1970), Linkhoune(1971), Santhy(1973), Savang(1975), Savay(1978). It was ultimately the love he has for his family that motivated him for change.

My grandfather was not the only hero of the family. While my grandfather was out fighting for his country, my grandmother stayed home and protected the children. My grandmother, like my grandfather, came from humble beginnings. She grew up without her parents as well as a family name; it was her aunt that raised her. My grandmother was the traditional Laotian woman who had very little choice in her life. She grew up without an education and was expected to be married by the time she was 16. The only choice she was free to make was to whom she wanted to marry. When her husband was away during the war, she automatically became the protector of the house. In 1964, during one of air bomb raids on the country, she gathered her children together and put them in a shed. The shed was made of steel and was difficult to move. During that time she was pregnant with Manivanh and her strength was not at 100%. To her, family was everything. The adrenaline to protect her children gave her the strength to open the steel door on her own and took refuge. When I asked her how she was able to do it, she told me, “When you have kids, all you want to do is to make sure they’re safe.”

When the ceasefire agreement between the two feuding sides came about, my grandfather sensed something big was going to happen. Two years before the Pathet Lao completely took over the government in 1975, my grandfather sent in his resignation letter and retired from the military. Once the Pathet Lao took hold on the government, they immediately sent out troops to capture known Royalists. My grandfather described that time to being similar to Mao Zedong’s (1893-1976) Cultural Revolution. If you were a scholar or possible threat, the government would have thrown you into a concentration camp. To avoid capture from the Pathet Lao, my grandfather quickly retired so his name would not show up on the list of members and hid his family away in the

countryside near the Mekong River. His friends were not as fortunate as him. They could not avoid capture and were thrown in jail. My grandfather did not know till much later that the friends that were captured suffered premature deaths. For two years, my family

hid and supported themselves by planting their own vegetable garden and raising

livestock. They would even fish from the Mekong River for more food.

Right before his retirement from the army, my grandfather foresaw the destruction of the country. He predicted the country would face starvation and death. He was right. After the communist took over, food became scarce. There was not enough food or rice for everyone. Death was everywhere. There were two ways to die: 1. Being thrown into a

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Figure 6 Virath Home in Laos, 1970s

concentration camp and working yourself to death or 2) starvation. Phonesavanh recalled a moment in her life where she faced the reality of the situation in her home country. “When I stand by the river, everyday, I see bodies float around because people try to escape. There would be too many people on one boat and it caused the boat to flip upside down. Sometimes these people cannot swim so they drown. It was scary to see.”

When my mother reminisces about the same memories she told me, “Sometimes you see a diamond ring or watch go bling bling, then you see a body float past you.”

The desperation for these people to run away from the country was the reality they faced each morning when they woke up. My aunt considers her family lucky to be by the river. Her in-laws were not so fortunate. They had to travel across the mountains by foot for two to three days before even seeing the river. My grandfather did not simply chose a spot to settle. He was always calculating the next move. By living near the Mekong River, they were able to study the movements of the nearby communist posts and effectively plan to cross the river. There were communist patrols everywhere to make sure no one was leaving the country. There were occurrences when families try to cross the river with babies, if a baby cried, there were no alternative but to kill the infant right then and there otherwise everyone in the boat would be danger of being captured and killed by the patrol.

As his children grew older, so did my grandfather’s worries. He was scared that this type of life was going nowhere for his family. My grandfather did not want to have his family suffer through a life that holds no glimmer of hope or freedom. What use is living a life where all you could see is death and poverty and no happy ending? They were living like caged animals, always scouring for food and treated like grotesque swine. He deemed his country to be unlivable and ultimately made his decision to get his family out of a living hell. My grandfather, along with his two oldest sons, Pradith and Phankham, traveled late at night across the Mekong River to Thailand by boat. The Mekong River serves as a border between Laos and Thailand. When I asked my uncle, Pradith, about his journey to Thailand he told me, “Leaving the country is no joke. I was around seventeen years old when we left. During that time your grandpa took me and your uncle across to Thailand. We were scared. There were communists everywhere and if they see you trying to cross, they won’t hesitate to shoot you right there.”

Once passed the midpoint of the river, they would be in Thai territory. When they

arrived, my grandfather quickly came back to Laos for the rest of the family. Unfortunately for Pradith and Phankham, the Thai police caught them. They stayed in the local jail for a week before being sent to a refugee camp in Nakhone Phanom where they lived like prisoners. He sacrificed himself by taking his family across the border to Thailand. But before he crossed the river, he had to study the best course of action. He could not afford to blindly cross the river without a plan. My grandfather and his family were trying to sneak by death; it was only a bullet away. He figured out the best time to escape was during the daytime. If they had traveled during the night, they would not be able to see if the guards were watching them. However, by being able to see the guards during the daytime, it provided them more opportunity to maneuver through. During his

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study, he also discovered that during the summer months, the tide was low enough for them to walk safely across the river. When the timing felt right, my grandfather divided the rest of family into three groups. Each group would leave at a different time and meet at the midway point. At the midway point, my grandfather waited patiently for his family to meet up with him.

Before the communist takeover, relationships between Thai and Lao were friendly. However, after the communist takeover, government officials frowned upon that relationship to the point where if one were to be seen escaping to Thailand, it becomes an automatic sentence to jail or camp. During their escape into Thailand, my aunt remembers a speedboat making their way towards them, “As soon as we made it to the Thai border, we saw motor boats patrolling the area. My heart was pounding really hard. If the communist patrol caught us, they could have shot us right there with their guns.” If anyone trying to escape were caught, the guards would not hesitate to shoot him or her dead.

Luck was on their side that day. The boat patrols were Thai helping refugees cross over. Once the family docked into Thailand, a tuk-tuk, an automated rickshaw, drove them into the nearest town. Because of my grandfather’s connections in Thailand, the family was able to reunite with Pradith and Phankham. My grandfather still wanted his children to receive an education. Through his connections, he was able to send his sons, Phayboune and Thongxay, to schools in the neighboring town.

My family lived three years in Thailand. Three painfully long years full of struggles and gripping onto their lives. They were finally away from the communists, but at the same time this was still not the reality my grandfather wanted for his family. Everyone had to constantly work everyday. A full day of work from dawn to dusk was the equivalent to only a day of food.

Everyday was the same endless cycle. The entire family would be up by 5AM. My mother and her sisters would go to the market to sell vegetables at the market. My uncles would be split into two groups. One group would go with my grandfather to work in the gardens while the other group would go with Pradith and fish. Later in the in the morning, my grandmother would arrive to the market with more vegetables and fish to sell at the market. When I asked my mother what life was like in Thailand she told me, “If you want to go to the bathroom, you go outside and dig up a hole. We didn’t have a bathroom or nothing like

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Figure 7 Virath Family working in the Garden in the United States, 1980s

that. You’re lucky. Back then, I didn’t have a childhood. None of us had a childhood. There was no time to play or have fun. Everyday was work to survive”. What was the point of leaving Laos if there was still no hope or dream to latch onto?

After three years of living in Thailand, my grandfather had enough of this lifestyle of going nowhere. In 1978, my grandfather gathered the entire family and went to the refugee camp. At the refugee camp, the family had to be interviewed for a pass that would eventually lead them out of the country. Usually for a pass to go through would take an average of time from a few months to years.

My grandfather was a special case, however. During his time in the army, he had served and was highly ranked in the Royal Lao Army as well as having strong connections with the French government and United States CIA. Because of his strong connections, the family was given special priority and left Thailand within three days. My grandfather was given the choice to go anywhere in the world. He narrowed down his choices to France, United States, and Canada. If he chose to go to France, the government would have given him a pension for his service to the country. He declined that offer and chose to go to the United States. He had gone to the United States three times before and had a better idea of what life was going to be like. He believed that the opportunities in America would be better for his children.

My grandfather is an interesting man. He is an honest, hard-working man who did not give in to corruption or greed. When he was living in Laos with his high status, many wealthy people sought after him for his influence but he kept to his beliefs and not let corruption take over him. He could have been fabulously wealthy in Laos, but instead he refused to give into greed.

Settling in the United States

My grandfather and his family arrived to America with only the clothes on their backs. A small Christian church in Manassas, Virginia sponsored their stay in the United States. Thanks to their kindness, my grandfather was able to start working towards a better life for his family. While he worked, my grandmother stayed home to watch the younger children and do housework while the older children went to school. Going to school felt like a great privilege to the family. In Laos, only a portion of children had a basic education. Due to the French occupation, my grandfather paid for Phonesavanh to go to Catholic school from kindergarten to eighth grade. But to go to high school in Laos involved a fierce competition. Only a selected few are able to enter high school. When I asked her about her feelings to coming to American, she said,

I was so determined. I want to get better so I educate myself. I self-taught my English then I went to high school. Finished high school, but after than I managed to work and go to NoVa (Northern Virginia Community College). Took me ten years to get my associate degree. Ten years, I never been so proud.

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Life in the America was also no walk in the park. They arrived to the United States with only the clothes on their backs, next to no English, and barely any knowledge of the culture. All their possessions had to be left in Laos, there was no room for them to take anything with them or else risk captured by the communist patrol team. Even though they successfully escaped the war torn country, the struggle to survive was still present.

Adjusting to American life was difficult for them, especially the older children. American culture is vastly different from the Lao culture they grew up with their entire lives. Although there are so many opportunities available, it was difficult to grab hold of that opportunity. It was incredibly hard to convey their feelings with such limited English. The Virath children followed a simple routine. Go to school, go to work, go home. Even in the United States, their cultural norms stuck to them. In the backyard, the family planted a vast garden mimicking the one they had in Thailand with vegetables ranging from green beans to Thai peppers. The garden is still around to this day, only with more surrounding trees. When my mother was in high school, her first job was at a Mcdonalds. From all the money she made, not a single cent did she spend on herself. Every check given to her, she gave it to my grandfather to handle. The same happened to Linkhoune. All the money he made from his part-time job was given to his father for family expenses. When I asked my uncle what life was like when they first moved to American, he told me, “Life is much better here than in Thailand or Laos. Everyone was nice to us, there was no discrimination. We looked different but people treat us with respect. Me, your mom, and everyone else didn’t do a lot. We didn’t party and gamble like the other kids. We were good and stayed home away from all that. It made your grandpa happy.”

Being in a foreign country, they were nervous to be apart from each other. The only place they could speak their native tongue was in the comfort of their own home or with the other Laotian refugees that arrived to the country. Once they stepped outside their new home, it is a different world full of

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Figure 8 My mother, Sounanhdone, 1990s


English and white faces. Like any other foreigner coming into a new country, it takes time to adapt to the culture. When my mother and her siblings arrived to the United States, they were considered to be the 1.5-generation. The term “1.5-generation” is used for immigrants entering the country before their adolescence. It was strenuous enough to come to America with only nothing, but even more difficult to adapt and relate to others their own age. Phonesavanh expressed to me, “I feel like I’m caught between two worlds. It is hard to fit in sometimes.” The same feeling could be said among her siblings. They are caught between two cultures where they do not truly belong to either. They cannot go back to their home country and they cannot truly fit in the United States. To an extent, even with a citizenship, they still feel like an alien. My mother arrived to America when she was thirteen years old. Because of her limited English and knowledge, she was sent back to the third grade. Unfortunately for my mother, she did not receive an education in Laos like her siblings.

Throughout her academic years in America, she studied extremely hard and did her best to memorize everything on her own. She could not ask her parents for help on account they themselves did not know the information as well as being far too busy with work. One of her greatest moments in life was graduating from high school but it became bittersweet, as it was also the end of her academic years. After graduation she went straight to work and later on, my mother and most of her siblings went off to get married and start a new life. No one in the family went off too far away. It is difficult to be away from one another. They will always remember that at the end of the day, family is all they have. Although they are in America and living the American dream, they can never forget their culture.

When I was growing up in a predominately white community, I was always asked the question “What kind of Asian are you?” Each time I am faced with this question, I am always at a loss of words. For one, the question itself is degrading and rude. But at the same time I want to inform them of my roots. I want to say “I’m Laotian” but I know that would lead to confused stares and raise more questions such as, “What is Laos?” To save myself from a repetitive explanation of the country, I would simply say, “I’m Thai or Vietnamese”, which is technically true by blood but in my heart, I am a first generation Laotian-American.

Being born in America, my older brother and I, along with the rest of my cousins, make up the first generation, a term to describe the children of the 1.5-generation. At first I did not realize how

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Figure 10 1.5 Generation dance practice


different it was for me growing up with my parents being the 1.5-generation until I looked at my classmates. I remember coming home from school and working on the homework of that night. Whenever I ran into a difficult problem, I could only go to my older brother for help because I knew that my parents could not help me. I used to be so jealous of my classmates because their parents would always help them with their homework.

Although I was jealous of how their parents are able to teach them things my parents are not able to, I feel so fortunate to be a part of my family’s culture. Living in a multi-cultural home opens my mind up to the world. I am proud to come from a family where when we go to Kentucky Fried Chicken, we bring a basket of sticky rice to eat with our chicken. On Thanksgiving, we would have the traditional turkey, mashed potatoes, and corn but we would also include Lao dishes such as fish, papaya salad, and sticky rice. We celebrate New Years like Americans but we also celebrate Lao New Years in April. As first generation Laotian-Americans, we experience both cultures but living in America causes our Laotian heritage to die a little.

For one, the use of our Lao language has greatly diminished. Growing up, initially I learned Lao from my parents. When I entered pre-school and only spoke Lao and not English, it caused a huge problem for my teacher. My teacher berated my parents for not teaching me English first. In their minds, they wanted me to succeed and if succeeding meant giving up a piece of our culture, then it had to be done. Since then, my parents tried to only speak English to me. From time to time they would speak Lao because of they could not get their full feelings across to me in English. My mother’s siblings felt the same way. The children of the first generation have an ear for the language, but when it comes to speaking, it is at an elementary level. When I asked my uncle, Pradith, how he felt about my generation’s lack of language, he told me, “It’s sad talking to my daughters and them talking back in English. When you look on the outside, you see Lao but on the inside, they’re American.”

Living up to our parent’s expectations was also hard for us. Because we did not suffer such hardships as they did, it took time for us to realize how blessed we were by being born in America. My aunt, Phonesavanh, arrived to America with the determination to succeed and for her children to succeed even more. She told me,

What hurts me right now is to see your generation. In Lao, if you want to go to high school, you have to compete to go in. If 2000 apply, maybe 200 can go. We have to study and memorize so hard. But in here, [your generation] has more chances. You guys have all the material you need; computer, calculator, books, everything. If you try hard, you can reach your goal. The kids in your generation are just average. [You guys] don’t excel and take it for granted. That’s what hurt me the most.

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Because I do not have children of my own, I can only partially understand what she was feeling. Everything she said is true. When I look at my older cousins, they are at an age where they should have graduated already. When I look at my younger cousins, I see one that has little to no drive in his life. Initially, I wanted to go to college because I

felt it was expected of me to go. After hearing the life stories of my grandfather, mother, and aunt, I want to complete my education to make up for what they are not able to do. My grandfather’s dream is seeing his children strive for a better future. They passed on that dream to their own children. When I graduate from Mary Baldwin College in 2015, I will be the first female in my family with a college degree. Recently I had a reoccurring dream. I am standing in front of a podium in my graduation gown with a huge smile on my

face while I look towards my family. In my grandfather’s eyes is a look that signifies that all the hard work and all the struggles he had gone through had not gone for waste. Standing on stage with a college diploma in hand is a proud declaration of the hope and prosperity he desperately wanted for his family. Although this was only a dream, it will soon become a reality. Cultural Hybrid

It’s been over thirty years since my grandfather and his family fled Laos and immigrated to America. One would wonder if feelings of going back to the home country arise. My grandfather travelled back to Thailand once years ago to attend his mother’s funeral. Coming back, he described the feeling to be different from what he remembered. “I walked the same road I did when I was younger but the buildings were different, the faces were different, this was not the town I knew once before.” The place he used to call home was no longer his home anymore. All that is left are memories that cannot be forgotten.

My grandfather was happy with his decision to come to America. He holds no regret. Would he go back to visit in the near future? Due to his health, most likely not. I posed the same question to the oldest son, Pradith said, “Go back? There’s no need to go back. I left Lao at 17. If I go back, who am I going to talk to? I don’t know anyone there. All my friends and family are here in America.”

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Figure 12 Santhy's college graduation

Figure 13 New Years, 2012


However, my aunt, Phonesavanh, holds a different opinion on the matter of going back. She will always want to go back to her home country but not to live. She wants to travel and visit the country of her birthplace. What she has in America right now is her home, in Laos, there are only memories.

When people emigrate from their home country, they want to build and secure a better future for their children. My grandfather accomplished everything he could do for his family. Now it is my turn to continue on that dream. If someone were to ask my grandfather what was the fruit of his hardship, he would tell them it is his grandchildren. I am the success of their hardships. Every choice they made led me to become the woman I am today. From the hardships that they endured, I have become a proud Laotian woman they can be proud of. The only thing I can do for my family is to succeed and continue the tradition of our people. Chances are, I will not be able to teach my children our language but I can still continue my Lao heritage through food, culture, and religion. Every time I see my grandparents, I’m reminded that it was because of them I am able to have a blessed life. My success is the product of their hardships. I am living their dream in a place we can call home.

Bibliography

Chanthakhoune, Phonesavanh. Interview by the author. Nokesville, VA. February , 2014. Dee, Ivan R. The Hidden History of the Vietnam War. Chicago, IL: John Prados, 1995.

The Fund for Peace. "The Failed State Index." Fund For Peace. Last modified 2013. Accessed March 3, 2014. http://ffp.statesindex.org/rankings.

No Reservations. "No Reservations: Laos." Travel Channel. March 4, 2014 (originally

aired July 7, 2008). Hosted by Anthony Bourdain. Phansa, Sounanhdone. Interview by the author. Nokesville, VA. February 8, 2014. Smith, Roger M. Governments and Politics of Southeast Asia. 2nd ed. Ithaca, NY:

Cornell University Press, 1964. Swierenga, Robert P., Dr. "'By the Sweat of our Brow:' Economic Aspects of the Dutch

Immigration to Michigan." Lecture presented at A.C. Van Raalte Institute for Historical Studies, Holland Museum Sesquicentennial Lecture Series, Hope College, Holland, MI, March 13, 1997.

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Figure 13 I won the title of Miss Lao New Year 2014

Virath, Nontha. Interview by the author. Nokesville, VA. February 8, 2014.Virath, Pradith. Interview by the author. Bristow, VA. February 8, 2014. Virath, Thongsay. Interview by the author. Nokesville, VA. February 8, 2014.

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Web viewThe terms of the treaty were that North Vietnam would end their involvement in Laos and that...

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