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Sean Fullmer
29 April 2014
English 2010 Portfolio
Rebecca Miner
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Introduction
This portfolio has three papers that I wrote for my English 2010 class. These ones
I chose because they vary in their topic and they vary in my interests. They show who I
am. I don’t add lots of personal exposition or personal views in them, but these topics
mean a lot to me because of the impact that they have had on my life.
Proposal: Improving Health One Company at a Time (pg. 4-13)
This is something that I love to talk about. I am completely fascinated by
the human body. I also know that taking care of our bodies can be a hard
thing. Here I have a proposal for businesses to improve the health care of
their employees by providing information on what the major health
problems that people face, and how to overcome them.
Evaluation: Iron & Wine’s Evolution Through Ghost on Ghost (pg. 14-17)
Music has always been a big part of my life. That is why I wanted to do
an evaluation of one of my favorite artists. I wanted to show how he has
evolved as an artist. I wanted to evaluate his abilities as a musician to
show that he truly is an artist.
Position: The Evolving Use of Slang in Gaming (pg. 18-23)
I’ve always loved playing video games. I have always been amazed at the
culture that exists between gamers. I wanted to explore this culture and
prove that it does exist. I wanted to show that this type of culture exists
because of the way they act but especially by how they speak one to
another.
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Peer Review (pg. 24-28)
This is a peer review I did of a classmate’s paper. This particular paper
was about the use of the n-word. I thought it was an interesting topic and
looked through the paper to see how she was able to talk about the concern
of using the n-word.
I have been someone that has always loved writing. I love a good story. I love
writing and telling those stories. I love learning something new and telling other people
and writing is one way to do that. I’ve never been good at writing for a specific theme or
very specific details. I have enjoyed this class because I was given some parameters of
what to write about and then I was told to have at it. I was grateful for this because it
showed me what I was able to do. It helped me to see that I could write about different
topics or similar topics in different ways. This class helped me to like writing more.
Through these assignments, they helped me to be able to share my interests with others.
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Improving Health One Company at a Time
In our world there are many health problems. The most well known of these
problems are cardiovascular or heart problems, obesity, and diabetes. These problems
are actually linked and cause or are caused by the other. Then what is to be done about
them? We can’t exactly cure them. However we are able to manage these problems and
their symptoms. In fact we are able to mostly prevent these kinds of problems from
taking over our lives or the lives of those that we love. But then the big question is how?
One of the best ways to improve the overall health of our society is exercise, specifically
running. By teaching about the benefits of running/exercise in school and work by a
personal trainer or a health advisor assigned there to help people make personal health
plans and goals, the health in or society will improve.
Health Problems
Before shooting this idea down entirely in skepticism and thinking that it’s not
necessary, think about it. If a company cared about it’s employees would it not want
them to be healthy? This would mean lower health insurance costs for the company and
for the employee. According to a Health Insurance Cost Statistic $2.54 trillion dollars
was spent on health care in 2010[7] while about $444 billion of that was spent on
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cardiovascular disease.[5] If so much money is spent on health care each and every year
would it not be in the best interest of the individual and also a company to find a better
use for that money? With this idea they both don’t have to shell out lots of money for a
health problem that could have been prevented.
Then the next order to getting rid of skepticism is understanding the problem then
how a personal trainer could help to overcome that problem. Overweight and obesity
affect many people. To be exact, more than two-thirds (68.5%)[4] of US adults and about
a third (31.8%)[4] of US children are affected by overweight and obesity. Well being
overweight isn’t too bad and obesity is something that’s not life-threatening you may
think. In all actuality they are can be life-threatening. Some of the symptoms that come
up because of these problems are coronary heart disease, Type 2 diabetes, cancers
(endometrial, breast, and colon), hypertension (high blood pressure), stroke, and
osteoarthritis (a breakdown of cartilage and bone within a joint)[2] to name a few.
The next major problem that needs to be understood is cardiovascular disease.
The major problems that arise from cardiovascular disease are:
coronary artery disease
heart attacks.
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Coronary artery disease is when a substance called plaque, which is made of cholesterol,
builds up in the arteries which supply blood to the heart. When it gets so blocked up that
no blood is being carried to that part of the heart is when we get heart attacks and that
part of the heart dies. About 600,000 people die of heart disease in the United States
every year–that’s 1 in every 4 deaths.[3]
With these health issues in the world and especially as they affect us in our nation
we are generally concerned about them. Most people want to be healthy they just may
not know how. People every year make resolutions to be healthier by working out and
eating right. However how many people actually can’t get past the first week or don’t
even start. Therefore what is to be done? That is why this proposal came to be. If we
were able to implement health advisors into companies in order to help their employees
to be healthier the health in the nation would change.
What to do?
Think about it. What if the company or business that you would work for actually
wanted you to be healthy? They in no way would require it. Your health or how healthy
you are would in no way affect you being hired or fired. However they would provide a
way for you to be healthy. They would provide incentives for you to keep working out
and eating healthily.
Now you may say that you have no time for working out, or that you don’t have
enough money to eat healthily. However that is a lie that you tell yourself. According to
the American Heart Association you only need about 30 minutes of exercise a day for 5
days of the week.[1] That shouldn’t take too much of your time. That’s just sacrificing a
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little bit of TV time or a little bit of time you would be munching down on snacks. There
is a way to be healthy and these health advisors would be one of those ways.
Running: The Way to a Healthy Heart
As an example of the power that working out and eating healthy we can look at is
the benefits that running can have in a person’s life. The American College of Sports
Medicine Position Statement on Exercise is a document they produce every few years
that goes over all of the health information for food and exercise. They stated recently
that:
[It] was shown in one study that individuals who ran more than 50 miles
per week had significantly greater increases in HDL cholesterol (the good
fat) and significantly greater decreases in body fat, triglyceride levels, and
the risk of coronary heart disease than individuals who ran less than 10
miles per week. In addition, the long-distance runners had a nearly 50%
reduction in high blood pressure and more than a 50% reduction in the use
of medications to lower blood pressure and plasma cholesterol levels.[8]
In short this is saying that running greatly helps the heart to be healthier. You in no way
need to run 50 miles a week to get these benefits though. These are just the results from
the study on people who were running that distance. One of the primary benefits of
running is cardiovascular health. It has even been shown in studies to reduce the amount
of plaque that can build up in those arteries.[6] So then why not run?
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Eating Right: How to Lose Weight
The other thing to look at with running is how it affects weight and eating. Running
burns lots of calories. It has been proven time and again in studies to burn lots of
calories. Richard Weil who is an exercise physiologist talked about running and losing
weight when he said, “But even if you ran a marathon every day, you wouldn't lose
weight unless you consumed fewer calories than you burned. The bottom line to losing
weight is burning more calories than you consume, no matter how much exercise you
do.”[8]
That is why the health advisors
would also be concerned about
your nutrition. They would be
there to make sure that you got the
right diet for the amount of
exercise that you were doing.
Now you might argue that you
don’t like running or that it’s hard
or that you’d rather walk. Weil
also commented on this when he
stated:
My take on it is that it doesn't matter whether you walk or run during
weight-loss efforts because you'll lose weight as long as you reduce your
calories enough to burn more than you are consuming, no matter how much,
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or what type of exercise you do. What is important is that you maintain
some type of exercise once you reach your goal weight, because it's
generally accepted that exercise is the single best predictor of keeping your
weight off. Whether you walk or run won't matter. The key is to do
something.[8]
There is the key. These health advisors would be here to help you to do something. In
the end it doesn’t matter what you do but you need to do something, and two of the best
ways to be healthier would be to have this health advisor and start running. They would
be there to make sure that you are reaching those health goals that you always give
yourself in every new years resolution. They’ll push you when you need it and keep you
on track. Imagine a good friend that you work with that is willing to help motivate you
and help you to be healthier. Don’t you want a friend like that?
Health Advisors
Part of their job would be to advise you. If you are comfortable they would be in
contact with your doctor. They would make a workout plan and diet that would work
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with your time, financial constraints, and whatever medical condition or problem that
comes up. Their job is to make you healthier. If you didn’t want them knowing that
information you could tell them what information you are comfortable sharing and they
would still work with you. Remember these people are here to help anybody and
everybody.
The requirements for this type of job would be high. They would need to get at
least a bachelor’s degree in exercise sciences or some similar field. This way they would
have an extensive knowledge about the human body, how it works, and how to best help
it. They would also be required to know many things about nutrition. This way they
could make competent decisions about a plan that could work for you to help you to be
healthier.
Company Incentives
There could also be many different incentives that come from the company or
business in association with this new health plan. Since the company and also the
employees are not paying such high insurance rates, with all the money that they are
saving they would be able to fund these health advisors/personal trainers. They would be
able to help raise wages for each employee of the company. It may not be a lot but every
little bit helps. If the company is noticing that this is really helping many of their
employees they could even be in connection with local gyms to provide memberships for
their employees. This way the employees have a place to work out if they really don’t
want to run. This could also include many other types of exercise such as swimming or
yoga. When a company would embrace this kind of idea they are saying that they care
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about their employees. They are saying that you matter to them. Your health matters to
them and they want you to be healthy.
Imagine this nation where we had businesses and companies that encouraged
people to be healthy. That with health advisors/personal trainers within these companies
they will help you to reach those health goals you’ve always wanted. They will help you
earn those wonderful health benefits from running. They can teach you and help you to
eat healthily and live better. This way your job or career feels like they are looking out
for you. That way you can live a healthy long life in order to be there for those that
matter to you.
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Bibliography
1. American Heart Association, “Recommendations for Physical Activity in Adults”, 14
Apr. 2014, Web 21 Apr. 2014
2. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: The Health Effects of Overweight and
Obesity. http://www.cdc.gov/healthyweight/effects/index.html. 6 Dec. 2013
3. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: Heart Disease Facts
http://www.cdc.gov/heartdisease/facts.htm. 19 Feb. 2014
4. Food Research and Action Center: Overweight and Obesity in the US.
http://frac.org/initiatives/hunger-and-obesity/obesity-in-the-us/
5. Griffin, R. Morgan; Nazario, Brunilda. “Heart Disease: What Are the Medical
Costs?”, http://www.webmd.com/healthy-aging/features/heart-disease-medical-
costs. 1 Mar. 2013.
6. Smurawa, Troy M., “The Benefits Of Running”.
http://www.sgsd.k12.wi.us/homework/smurawas/benefits_of_running.htm
7. Statistic Brain, “Health Insurance Cost Statistics”, 19 Dec. 2013
8. Weil, Richard; Shiel, William C., Jr. “Running (Jogging)”, medicinenet.com, 9 Jan.
2014, Web. 15 Mar. 2014
Images
1. http://www.pt.com.sg/qws/slot/u50032/Personal%20Trainers/what-is-a-
personal-trainer.jpg
2. http://www.superhealthykids.com/uploads/files/10889/med/Choose-
MyPlate-Breakfast.jpg
3. http://moviewriternyu.files.wordpress.com/2013/07/runner.jpg
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4. http://medigap.s3.amazonaws.com/media/
GTY_heart_attack_jef_130906_16x9_992.jpg
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Iron & Wine’s Evolution Through Ghost on Ghost
Photo of Iron & Wine’s Album Ghost on Ghost
With all of the music in this world there are many people who look for artists who
really can actually sing, play instruments, and don’t just use auto-tune. Well world look
no further than the man and a band that has stirring vocals, captivating lyrics, and
outstanding instrumental skills that show that they are to be considered real artists. The
band is Iron & Wine who has released their latest album Ghost on Ghost.
This marks the fifth studio album that Iron & Wine has released for Sub Pop
records, an independent record label. The genre of music that Iron & Wine is most
associated with is folk or acoustic. You may not have heard Iron & Wine on the radio due
to the fact that they are an independent band. However that doesn’t mean that you
haven’t head their work as it has been featured in many various media forms. Some of
Iron & Wine’s more recognizable songs are the cover of The Postal Service’s Such Great
Heights and the song Flightless Bird American Mouth that was featured in the movie
Twilight. Iron and Wine’s music has appeared in commercials, on television shows
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(Grey’s Anatomy, House), in movies (In Good Company, Twilight, Garden State), as well
as for different charities. Iron and Wine frequently plays in the Twilight Concert Series
here in Salt Lake, which many people can come and enjoy. His music has been heard by
various different people in all these media forms, so anyone who has seen these movies,
television shows, or concerts, has heard his music. So if you haven’t heard of this band
then this is the time to listen in and become enamored by them.
Iron & Wine’s latest album Ghost on Ghost has many of the same elements that
his previous albums have had. Sam Beam is the lead singer, lead guitarist, and
songwriter. That is the same throughout all his albums. However now in this album he
takes a different step in what instruments he wants in each song. When he first began
performing solo, it was just him and the guitar. Now he has a whole band with him, full
of trumpet players, drums, sax players, bass, and back up vocals. But is all of that extra
stuff necessary for this album? He was good in other albums with just a normal band but
does he need the extras?
Photo of Sam Beam of Iron & Wine
To be blunt, Sam Beam really doesn’t need all the extras. They aren’t the things
that make the song what it is. His vocals and songwriting are what make his songs. Sam
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Beam does a lot of solo work and he is amazing at it. However in this album, with these
songs, all these instruments provide lush new experiences and a joy that is felt by their
presence. So as they are not necessary they are most certainly enjoyed, and definitely
something to look forward to.
Many of Iron & Wine’s fans had varying reactions and feelings for their last
album Kiss Each Other Clean because it featured many different instruments and had a
more pop feel to it. However with each of Iron & Wine’s albums he also likes to try new
genres of music. In the first album The Creek Drank the Cradle it was mainly acoustic.
Second came Our Endless Numbered Days, which had a more folk and some bluegrass
sound to it. In the third album The Shepherds’ Dog, it had more of an indie rock feel to
it. This just attests to how musically gifted that Sam Beam really is and that he is a
musical genius. He is able to write for all of these different genres and produce quality
music that makes you crave for more like a drug, or sooths the soul like a medicinal
salve.
With Ghost on Ghost, Iron & Wine continues that addiction. There are a few
songs like Grass Windows and Winter Prayers that sound like his wonderful acoustic
songs from albums past. Then Sam also gives a few different that have a more jazz or
blues feel to them such as Desert Babbler and Grace for Saints and Ramblers. But even
though these songs are a little different, Sam shows that he can make them work. But not
only that he makes them something that you want to hear again. With his wonderful
lyrics and unbelievably mesmerizing voice this is an album that doesn’t disappoint and is
something you’ll want to listen to again and again.
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Bibliography
Photos: http://pitchfork.com/news/49371-iron-wine-return-with-new-album-ghost-on-
ghost-share-new-track-lovers-revolution/
http://poprenegade.wordpress.com/2011/04/27/featureinterview-iron-and-wine/
-Here are the song links from the album Ghost on Ghost.
Desert Babbler: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DR_jh8_a-_Q
Grace for Saints and Ramblers: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R12yl4oGzMY
-Here are some other songs that were mentioned in the article:
Flightless Bird American Mouth: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIHaNh3jRXg
Such Great Heights: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCYWymG9fSs
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The Evolving Use of Slang in Gaming
Gaming use to be viewed as just a past time, or if you were a parent trying to raise
kids, a complete waste of time. Now gaming has grown into a community that stretches
all over the world. With that global expansion the gaming community has developed
their own language, acronyms, and slang. With each new game, they introduce more
slang and more vocabulary to be used in the gaming community and you need to keep up
with most of it to understand some of the more hardcore gamers. If you want to better
understand as a parent what kind of games your kids play, or if you’re interested in
understanding the guys better on “The Big Bang Theory”, then you need to understand
the lingo of gamers.
There are many things that must be understood in the gaming community to
understand it’s language and one of them is its history. There were a few games before
it, but the game and console that is attributed with the beginning success of video games
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is Atari’s Pong. From that many arcade games sprung up, followed by computer games,
which then led to video game consoles (Nintendo Entertainment System-NES,
PlayStation). Gamers are proud of their history. They are proud that something as
simple as a table tennis game like Pong could develop into a grand community that
eventually led to games such as Super Mario Bros. or Call of Duty. It’s almost like
being part of a brotherhood (or sisterhood to the girl gamers out there).
In a recent survey done on 1,100 young people between the ages of twelve to
seventeen, they found out that around 97 percent of those young people surveyed play
video games.[2] It also wasn’t just boys, but girls too. This has created something very
interesting to look at. This community of video gamers is composed of people boys and
girls that play these games. What is also amazing is that these gamers don’t just play by
themselves. They are actually playing to include others and to interact with other players.
The survey was able to find that, “they don't just play by themselves. Nearly two-thirds
play video games to socialize face-to-face with friends and family, while just over a
quarter said they play with Internet friends.”[2] From this we can see that gaming and
gamers in general is suppose to be a community thing where they are interacting and
communicating with one another.
Therefore you must understand some of the most basic words or phrases used to
make sense of it all. Parents wanting to know what’s going on with their kid’s games
would probably also like a translator to help in their understanding. This list will help
just a little in your beginning education in Gaming Lingo 1010. The rest comes from
experience and figuring it out as you go along. These come from personal experience as
well as looking at lists that have the most popular words used. This language adds more
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and more as new games are introduced, so it’s not enough to just look at one short list
and say it’s enough. It might change in a month to a year.
The most common words, phrases or acronyms that I’ve come across are n00b
(Noob), RPG and MMORPG, WoW, Teabagging, Pwned, and Easter Eggs.[1][3]
Remember these are the most basic of parts of their language that you might hear. Noob,
n00b or you might even see newb is just a simple way of saying a newbie. It’s to
acknowledge someone that’s new to gaming or just that game. They may feel that they
are picked on because they are new, but they are just trying to get use to a new game and
the experienced gamers are helping in their own weird and loving way.
RPG and MMORPG refer to games that are Role Playing Games and Massive
Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games. It’s the type of games like WoW (World of
Warcraft) where you level up your character in the game after getting so much
experience. So you can understand how distraught someone might be if they’ve spent a
lot of time leveling up their character only to have that data corrupted or deleted. It feels
like those past 50+hours of gaming were a waste. So be kind to these gamers when such
things happen. It’s a rather devastating feeling.
The next two go well with each other. Teabagging and Pwned. Pwned was just a
misspelling of the word owned and it just stuck. So when you see that someone got
pwned you can better understand that they just lost….big time. The next one is rather
crude and an action this writer does not engage in. Teabagging refers to crouching
repeatedly in FPS games over the person you just killed. It’s to show that someone just
got pwned and is rather immature. So parents if you ever hear that your kids talking
about teabagging wash their mouths out with soap. It’s rather disgusting.
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Now with any community (especially an online community) there are certain
rules with grammar. With the gaming community…there really isn’t rules on grammar.
Some people post or say any nonsensical thing that either pops into their head or
accidentally comes on screen. So how can anyone make sense of this stuff? When
you’re playing an FPS (first person shooter, think Call of Duty) are you concerned with
what someone has said and trying to make sense of it? Or are you more worried about
getting shot in the next 5 seconds because you weren’t paying attention?
Not understanding what the lingo is when playing with other human beings could lead to
frustration because someone just killed you (figuratively of course). There is however an
official language of gaming and it’s called Leet (which could also be written as l33t or
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1337). It is alphanumeric, meaning it consists of letters and numbers, and that’s probably
why it looks so darn confusing.
Lastly the easiest to talk about is Easter Eggs. Easter Eggs are those little hidden
gems in video games. Think of at the end of all Marvel movies they have a post credit
scene that shows something happening in the next movie. That is an Easter Egg. So
when a gamer shouts for joy at finding an Easter Egg you can understand their joy.
From these examples you can see that video games have built up a community.
They have their own culture, their own language, and their own way of including you, or
humiliating you. Anyone, whether you’re a nOOb, an experienced gamer, or a parent
wondering what kind of games that your kids are playing, can join this community. You
can understand in part their language. You can understand why it changes so much. By
understanding these things you can see that video gamers are quite a complex group of
people that interact with one another. By understanding these things you can understand
how their world and language change constantly.
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Sources:
1. http://community.us.playstation.com/t5/PlayStation-Lounge/Gaming-Slang-and-
Sayings-Over-100-Words/td-p/10022149
2. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/09/16/survey-97-percent-of-
chil_n_126948.html
3. http://voices.yahoo.com/gamers-guide-common-words-phrases-lingo-used-
5536497.html
4. http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_hzvZWV2TnTo/S78UmdHYP5I/AAAAAAAAAEA/
_flr7nRJw2E/s1600/video-games-education.jpg
5. http://addictionblog.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/why-do-people-play-video-
games-2.jpg
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PEER REVIEW by Sean Fullmer
Jessica Brown
April 7, 2014
The N-Word in Rap Music
Is the N-word in rap music a cause for concern among all races? The use of the N-
word in rap music is not only a reflection of the music business, but also a reflection of
society as a whole. This is more than an issue of color. More than if someone is black or
white. It’s an issue of what’s right and how to move forward. In order to understand what
is right, we must first understand the true meaning of the N-word and what it was
originally used for.
The African-American Registry gave a pretty thorough rundown of how the N-
word came to be. Here’s what they said:
The history of the word nigger is often traced to the Latin word niger, meaning
Black. This word became the noun, Negro (Black person) in English, and simply
the color Black in Spanish and Portuguese. In early modern French, niger became
negre and, later, negress (Black woman) was unmistakably a part of language
history. One can compare to negre the derogatory nigger and earlier English
substitutes such as negar, neegar, neger, and niggor that developed into its lexico-
semantic true version in English. It is probable that nigger is a phonetic spelling
of the White Southern mispronunciation of Negro.
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It wasn’t long into the early 1800’s when the word had become known as vulgar and
derogatory. It’s important to look at what was going on around this time in order to truly
understand the word’s use. America—and in particular the South—was full blown into
slavery and was starting to become a global powerhouse in the financial world in large
part because of the detainment of Africans. There was no reason to the use the N-word in
this era unless there was a negative meaning behind it.
Fast-forward to today, and the N-word still carries the same negative
connotations, but the majority of people saying it look like who the word is intended to
disrespect. This is referring to African-Americans. The race has largely accepted its harsh
terms and decided to take ownership of the word and turn it into something positive, but
with one exception: They and only they are allowed to use the N-word without being
considered racist. Wait a second…this seems like a bit of a double-standard, right?
Fully accepting the ridiculously harsh meaning and history of the word is the
perfect step for moving forward as a society—not just as African-Americans. But at the
same time, if we’re all going to look at the word as one of the most vicious in the English
language, then shouldn’t we all take responsibility in not using it?
Luvell Anderson wrote a piece in which he tries to explain why African-
Americans are “allowed” to use the word. Anderson, an African-American himself, had
this to say:
I think that slurs are prohibited terms whose occurrences are offensive. When
enough people (or the right person or persons) say a word is not appropriate for
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referring to a particular group, then that word becomes a slur. However, the
prohibition is not absolute. It does allow for some exceptions. Among those
exceptions are non-derogatory uses by members of the targeted group.
Immediately we can see why African Americans (and certain others) can use the
N-word for camaraderie purposes while non-African Americans typically cannot.
It is just built into the exception clause that the former can and the latter cannot.
The most troubling phrase of Anderson’s excerpt is how he randomly brings in an
“exception clause” that makes it okay for African-American’s to use the N-word, but not
white people. Bringing in a random and completely made up clause to justify the use of
this word for one race and not the other is, well to put it bluntly, ridiculous. Anybody
could come up with a “clause” that makes it okay for white people to use the word and it
would be shot down faster than a blink.
The debate following the N-word is big enough, but adding in how it’s used in rap
music pushes the subject to a whole new level. One of the driving factors of this is how
the majority of rappers are African-American, but the majority of listeners are actually
white (Mills, 2001). This might sound surprising at first, but consider the fact that there
are significantly more white people than African-Americans in the United States and it
begins to make sense. Combine this fact with the ever-increasing use of the N-word in
rap music and it’s easy to start to see the problem. Take a look at this example for
instance.
Rapper, YG, recently came out with a song titled, “My Nigga.” This song says the
N-word 115 times. No, that’s not a typo. It uses the word 115 times in three minutes and
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56 seconds. It would be one thing if barely anybody heard the song, but this song peaked
at No. 19 on the Billboard charts, meaning that it became incredibly popular in American
music. If most of the people hearing it are white, then it’s almost impossible to expect all
of them to not say the same words when singing along with the song. The problem is that
most African-Americans would probably have a problem with hearing a white person say
the N-word 115 times in less than four minutes. If it’s such a problem for white people to
use it, then it needs to be as big of a problem for African-Americans to use it.
I’m a young white woman myself and in no way support the use of the word,
however, am a very big fan of rap music. The N-word is arguably the vilest word to ever
have been created, yet it’s somehow made an emergence among American culture, but
it’s now primarily coming from African-Americans. We as a society need to remember
why the word was looked at in such a negative light from the beginning in order to get
back to seeing the word in that way. If we’re unable to do that, then the number of people
using the N-word across all races will continue to grow and rap music is the driving force
behind it.
Fullmer 27
Peer Review 1. This is a very interesting paper. Your topic really grabs people from the start.
Anything that has to do with race and especially the n-word makes for a bold topic. Good on ya. It really grabbed me the second I read the heading. Then the intro helped me to see what you were trying to argue.
2. As I understand it your thesis and position come from that second paragraph where you stated, “The use of the N-word in rap music is not only a reflection of the music business, but also a reflection of society as a whole.”
3. You had many points that were very logical and thought provoking as mentioned in the comments. Your points on the history of the n-word, the double-standard and the exception clause helped to prove your point and shut down arguments against your point.
4. Your persuasion was really good because you explained things well and helped me to see your point of view. I wasn’t guessing as to what you were really trying to say.
5. The voice I felt in this paper was one that was fun, concerned, and informative. You voiced your concern; you were fun and not just droll with the topic; it was interesting to read because of the information provided. You used good sources to back up your points and establish your voice more.
6. Your pathos was good. It seemed hidden at first but as I reread your paper I found it. Every time you describe the n-word it is usually a very hate filled word such as vilest, vulgar, and derogatory. These words helped to show your hate and that was good. There needed to be that feeling of hate in this topic for this word if we could ever see any change with it.
7. I liked your conclusion in how it summed up everything. You put forth the idea that this word needs to leave our vocab and why. You also point out if we don’t stop it, it’s going to continue to grow through rap music. Very good points to make in your conclusion. This also helped to remind me of how much I hate this word too.
Fullmer 28