TOKALA INAJINYO TIMES

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SMILE LIVE LAUGH LOVE HOPE

Tokala Inajinyo

Times Issue Date

February2013 Cannapopa Wi

Popping Tree Moon

TO INSPIRE OUR YOUTH VOLUME 2 ISSUE 6

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LOVE STATS

73 percent of people who buy flowers for Valentine's Day are men, while only 27

percent are women.

The red rose was the favorite flower of Venus, the Roman goddess of love.

Over $1 billion worth of chocolate is

purchased for Valentine's Day in the

U.S.

Richard Cadbury produced the first box of chocolates for Valentine's Day in the late 1800s.

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Is This Abuse? Dating abuse is a pattern of destructive behaviors used to exert power and control over a dating partner. While we define dating violence as a pattern, that doesn’t mean the first instance of abuse is not dating violence. It just recognizes that dating violence usually involves a series of abusive behaviors over a course of time. Warning Signs of Abuse Because relationships exist on a spectrum, it can be hard to tell when a behavior crosses the line from healthy to unhealthy or even abusive. Use these warning signs of abuse to see if your relationship is going in the wrong direction: • Checking your cell phone or email without permission • Constantly putting you down • Extreme jealousy or insecurity • Explosive temper • Isolating you from family or friends • Making false accusations • Mood swings • Physically hurting you in any way • Possessiveness • Telling you what to do Learn more about how unhealthy relationships work by exploring our power

and control wheel at loveisrespect.org.

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Dating Basics Relationships exist on a spectrum, from healthy to unhealthy to abusive -- and

everywhere in between. It can be hard to determine where your relationship falls, especially if you haven’t dated a lot. Explore this section to learn the basics of dating,

healthy relationships and drawing the line before abuse starts. Is My Relationship Healthy? In a healthy relationship: • Your partner respects you and your individuality. • You are both open and honest. • Your partner supports you and your choices even when they disagree with you. • Both of you have equal say and respected boundaries. • Your partner understands that you need to study or hang out with friends or family. • You can communicate your feelings without being afraid of negative consequences. • Both of you feel safe being open and honest. A good partner is not excessively jealous and does not make you feel guilty when you spend time with family and friends. A good partner also compliments you, encourages you to achieve your goals and does not resent your accomplishments. My Partner Doesn’t Physically Hurt Me Just because there is no physical abuse in your relationship doesn’t mean it’s healthy. It’s not healthy if your partner: • Is inconsiderate, disrespectful or distrustful. • Doesn’t communicate their feelings. • Tries to emotionally or financially control you by placing your money in their banking account. • Keeps you from getting a job or gets you fired. • Humiliates you on Facebook or in front of your friends. • Threatens to out you to your family. So, Is My Relationship Unhealthy? Everybody deserves to be in a healthy relationship free from violence. Drawing the line between unhealthy and abusive can be hard. If you think your relationship is going in the wrong direction, check out the warning signs of abuse at loveisrespect.org. Remember, there are many types of abuse and while you may think some of them are normal -- they are not. Even though teen and 20-something relationships may be different from adult ones, young people do experience the same types of physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abuse that adults do. You should take violence in your relationship seriously.

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TOKALA INAJINYO IS TAKING THE PLEDGE! TAKE THE PLEDGE WITH US!!

I, take the pledge and promise to have healthy, safe relationships free from violence and free from fear. Then, share it with your partners, friends and family because everyone has the right to a healthy relationship!

I, promise myself, future and current partners to maintain relationships that are based on respect, equality, trust and honest communication.

I will value my partner’s boundaries online and behind closed doors. I will never engage in any type of abuse -- physical, emotional, sexual, financial or digital.

If one of my friends experiences abuse, I pledge to help them by saying something, modeling healthy communication and connecting them to resources.

I pledge to remember, demonstrate and promote the fact that love is respect. And I have the right to Live and Love without fear.

“There comes a point when you either embrace who and what you are, or condemn

yourself to be miserable all your days. Other people will try to make you miserable;

don’t help them by doing the job yourself.” ― Laurell K. Hamilton

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AROUND TOWN

TOKALA INAJINYO MENTORS Cool Guys

Native Hope Thank you Clayton Small for working with our Peer Mentors!!

And the Winner is……. Gabe and Carmelita!

Bear Butte Cultural Trip

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TOKALA INAJINYO PEER MENTORS

NATIVE HOPE (HELPING OUR PEOPLE ENDURE) TRAINING

Trainer: Clayton Small, PhD

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UPCOMING EVENTS!!

February 6 – 7, 2013: Peer Mentor Training – Native Hope training with Clayton Small, PhD at SGU Multipurpose Room. It is going to be awesome!

February 13, 2013: Sweetheart Dance at St. Francis Indian School – 7 – 9 pm

February 14, 2013: HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY ❤❤❤

March 15, 2013: Spring Lock In at St. Francis Indian School

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Tokala Inajinyo

Times PO Box 428

Mission, SD 57570

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-TALK(8255) St. Francis Mission Crisis Line –

605-319-1280

Tokala Program – 605-747-2342

If you are interested in submitting a story or photos to the Tokala Inajinyo Suicide Prevention

Mentoring Program, or would like to volunteer, please contact our staff at 605-747-2342. Thank you and

have a beautiful day!!

TOKALA STAFF

Tori – Coordinator Matthew – Mentor Stacia – Counselor/Case Manager Zack – Mentor Julia – Counselor/Case Manager Kayla – Mentor Stephanie – Counselor/Case Manager Kodi – Mentor AJ – Equine Caretaker Tokala.inajinyo@gmail.com

You Are Not Alone!

❤❤❤ I am worth waiting for ❤❤❤