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FirstPrinting,November2006

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PrintedbyCafePress.comintheUnitedStatesofAmerica

To Harry & Helen Hotpocket

INTRODUCTION

IlaunchedthepoliticalparodywebsiteWHITEHOUSE.ORGinJulyof2001withasimple,whollyjuvenilemission:ridiculethemighty,lampoontheabsurd,andmockthefanatical–usingpreposterouslyobvioussatire.

Sincethen,WHITEHOUSE.ORGhasreceivedover50,000e-mailsfromthegeneralpublic.Manyaresupportivemissivesfromtaste-impairedfansofthesite’sferventlytactlessirreverence.Alsocommonisvitriolichate mail from GOP partisans - furious that their beloved Presidentis being subjected to derision. Yet thousands of others are lettersfrompeoplewho,somehowoblivioustoWHITEHOUSE.ORG’spatentlyabsurdcontent, believe they are on the official website of the Executive Branch oftheUnitedStatesgovernment–andtakeadvantageoftheoccasiontosendtheirpraise,grievances,andepiphaniestoGeorgeW.Bush.Orsotheythought.

For over five years, I have sorted through this steady stream of wondrouscorrespondence,andhereofferarepresentativesamplingforyourvoyeuristicpleasure.Thenearly600e-mailscontainedinthesepagesofferwhatI’vefoundtobeafascinatingglimpseintonotonlythePresidentialmailbag,butalsothesoulofadisturbinglymanic,hyperpolarizedera.

You’lllaugh.You’llcry.You’llfearforthefutureofthehumanrace.

-JohnA.WoodenEditorinChief,WHITEHOUSE.ORGDecember,2006

TABLE OF CONTENTS

FEAR FIESTA–Post-9/11Paranoia 1

LUVYA DUBYA!–FanMailforPresidentBush 15

PATRIOTIC EPIPHANIES–UnsolicitedIdeas&AdviceforPOTUS 31

JEERS & LOATHING–BushHatersSurrenderingtoRage 47

KIDDY KORNER–LettersfromChildren 61

RE-ELECTION FEVER–The2004CampaignSeason 71

HURRICANE HOOPLA-TheKatrinaDisaster 97

POLICY POTLUCK–OpinionsFromtheHeartland 107

IRAQ n’ ROLL–AmericaatWar 137

I.

II.

III.

IV.

V.

VI.

VII.

VIII.

IX.

�I. FEAR FIESTA: POST-9/�� paranoia

I. FEAR FIESTA – post-9/�� paranoia

Subject:NoCutbacksonNukeArsenalFrom:tommylee(healneagle@aol.com)Sent:Monday,May13,20027:17PM

DearSir:Hi,IamaNavyvetwhovotedforyou.IurgeyouNottodestroyANYofournucleararsenalsjusttoplacatetheRusskies;thereisjusttoomanyotherfoessuchasRedChinawhoisbuildinguptheirnukes.Sir,keepournukesintactanddon’tfallfortheglasnost/periostoikacrapoftheSovietskies;it’sjustaruse;DoNottrustevercommunistsofanypersuasion.Thanksandtakecare.

Godbless,TommyLee

* * *

Subject:terrorthreatFrom:PeterDeSanctis,M.D.(pnds1@optonline.net)Sent:Saturday,May18,20026:28PM

Mysmartwifehasaskedmetorelaytoyouherconcernthatanumberofterrorists,actingtogether,couldcausegreatharmtothiscountrybysimultaneously starting wildfires around the country, in and away from cities andtowns,orevenaltogetherremoteareas.Thetremendouslogisticalproblemsofdealingwithalloftheseeventsatthesametimewouldthenofferotherpossibilitiesofcreatingadifferentsetofurgentproblems.Itwouldbeahorror.

* * *

Subject:TerrorSenarioFrom:BobShelman(omarttm@comcast.net)Sent:Sunday,May19,20026:55PM

WeHave10’softhousandsofselfserviceGasstationsand10””softhousandsofForeignstudentsincountryfromwhatweconsiderterroristNations...Ifthatdoesn’tscareyou,Idon’tknowwhatwill!IsentthisinformationtotheJacksonville Fl. FBI office twice in Nov. 2001, and once to the the govs rewards siteacouplemonthslater..Therehasneverbeenanindicationthatanyoneeverreadthesemessagesnoristhereanyvisableproofofanincreaseofsecurityatourlocalstores.

It only takes one fanatic with a desire to be with allah, and an m-80 firecracker todestroyacityblockormore,andaloteasierthanrentingapartmentsandbringingtheirownexplosives.

Idon’tneedtodrawapictureontheoutcomeofacouple1000selected20to50thousandgallongasbombsgoingoffaroundthecountry.

Dear Dubya: A Totally Unauthorized Snoop Inside the Presidential Mailbag �

Ifyouhavereadthispleasecontactanyoneyouthinkcanatleastseethatthispossibilityisunderconsideration..

* * *

Subject:WorldunrestFrom:MartinE.Jennings(martkate@msn.com)Sent:Sunday,May26,200210:22PM

IjustwantyoutoknowMr.PresidentthatI,likemanyotherfreedomlovingAmericans,fullysupportyourstandagainstterrorismandamwillingtoforgosomecivillibertiestohelpthatbattle.Afterall,ifyouhavenothingtohide,whywouldyouobjecttoasearch??

Keepupthegreatwork!

* * *

Subject:Possibleterroristattack?From:LuisViegas(LuisViegas@netc.pt)Sent:Tuesday,June04,20023:40PM

I’mterriblysorryifthisisnottherightwayofcontactingyouaboutthissubject,butitwastheonlywayIfound.

Onyesterday’snews(OnaPortuguesenewspaper)IsawsomethingthatcalledmyattentionaboutthecurrentproblemtheworldishavingaboutOsamaBinLaden.Thenewspaperweresaying,thatBinLadenthreatenedabouthisnextattackwhichwillbesomewhereyou(americans)willneverguess.

Well,thisispurelyaguessofmine,butyoushouldnotputthatpossibilityasside...WhatwouldbetheresultofanucleardetonationontheNorthPole?Iftheicemeltsdownitwilltheendofallcoastalcities,andIthinkBinLadenhasthemanpowertoachievethatcatastropheifhe’smadenoughforthat.

* * *

Subject:myopinionFrom:LinLEE(rabbitcontect@hotmail.com)Sent:Sunday,June23,20021:15AM

Dearsir,Beforeisaysomethingelse,iwishyoushouldpayattentiontothatimNOTaterrorist!!!Actually,asyoucheckingoutfrommineIpaddress,imaChinesestudent.Iwasfeelingsorrowfulforthe911andanyterroreventsintheUnitedstates.So,isendthismailjustwanasayalittlebitsuggestiontoyourforbuildthepeaceofworld.

Igotainformationfromminefriendtalkingwithme.IknowthattheMercuryThermometerwassellinginthehospitalandanyhealthagency,soanybodywhocanboughtiteasily.Ithinkitshouldbeaproblem.Cause,theMercurycanbecomeachemicalprankishtools’material.

�I. FEAR FIESTA: POST-9/�� paranoia

Wheniwasinstudyterm,iunderstoodthatiftheMercurymixwiththeconcentratedNitricacidorotherchemicalsubstance,thefumeswillappear and these fumes are toxic and flammable. if this procedure be done by volume,toengenderfumewillbemorebanefulthantheanypoisongasanditwilltocausebraindamageifinhaled.

Forthisreason,ithinkshouldtolimittheMercuryThermometersaleinanystorewheretherecanbuyandsearchasupersededsuchasalcoholandotherlesstoxic fillings.

sincerely,achinese

* * *

Subject:FourthofJulyFrom:Robert(RobertKohn19@hotmail.com)Sent:Thursday,June27,20029:14PM

IheardonthenewsofapossibleTerrorismattackon07/04/02.Iwasthinkingofwhatcoulditpossiblebe.Soonthe4thofJulyAmericanscelebratethereIndependents.Whatdomustpeopledoonthe4thofJuly.Theyshootofffireworks. I was wondering what the likely hood of a company being establish that would manufacture fire works. This company would manufacture basically the main event fire work. Usually in the range of $25 and up for the grand finally. Everyone would gather around the main event to watch. And instead of fireworks going off like we all think it would. Its filled with some type of highly explosivewithchemicalexplosiveinside.CanyouImagineifOsamaBinLadenOpen up his own Firework Manufacture Company building this firework to explode. TherecouldbeexplosionallacrossAmerica.Thereisnorumorgoingaroundaboutthis,itwasjustsomethingIthoughtthatcouldbepossibleandwantedsomebodyelsetoknowwhatIthought.

* * *

Subject:Rumor:PLEASEPLEASEREADFrom:JosephAbud(Latinfire1023@aol.com)Sent:Tuesday,August13,20023:58PM

MYsonwasonaBritneySpearswebsiteandtoldmetoreadsomething(worldofbritney.com)someonehadpostedawarningtotheUScitizensthatsaysthatallpepsiproductsdatedAugust6arecarryingarsenic.Pleaseviewthewebsiteandthenlookintoitwiththefbiandtakepepsioffthemarketifnesessary,asa52yearoldAmericanwhoalwaysdrinksPepsi,thisfrightensmedeeply.PLEASElookintothisandgetbacktome.ThankYou

* * *

Subject:theAmericanTwentydollarbillFrom:PatriciaRhude(windchimes@lcturbonet.com)Sent:Wednesday,August14,20029:33PM

Dear Dubya: A Totally Unauthorized Snoop Inside the Presidential Mailbag �

IhavebeentoldthattheplatesforthetwentydollarbillweremadeinIran,isthistrue?Andihavebeenshownthatwhenitisfoldedisshowswhatlookslike to be the twin towers on fire, with america on one side and united on the other,representingtheplanesthathitthem,andontheothersideitshowsthepentagon on fire. Also I have now been shown that on the right ear of President FranklinyoucanclearlyseethefaceofSadam.Arethepeoplewhotakecareofourmoneyawareofthis?Has this been known for a long time , or is this all just a fluke, concerned If we shouldbecheckingallofourmoneyforacluetothenextattact.

* * *

Subject:treasonFrom:Stanleyj.Stack(prvrtbl1@aol.com)Sent:Thursday,September05,20025:26PM

Ilstatelicenseplatebearingacroynmfor“”IbeBinLadin””(IBBNLDN)isbeingdrivinbymideasternmanitturbin.Platisonajeep.thisIregardastreason,doesanyonehavethecourageinourgovernmenttocheckthisoutoramIa racist profiler for finding it offensive.p.s.whenainternetpollaskedtheamericanpublicforsuggestionsforairplane safety, I suggested profiling of people of mid eastern decent, my suggestionwasdeletedfromethesite.

* * *

Subject:EMBASSYSFrom:LARRYPENNY(FOURPENNYS@AOL.COM)Sent:Thursday,September05,200211:16PM

IRECOMMENDTOCLOSEALLEMBASSYSANDBASESOVERSEASIN“”ALL””COUNTRIES.BRINGEVERYONEHOME.RECLAIMANYPROPERTYINU.S.OWNBYFOREIGNERSEXPECIALLYTHEREEMBASSYOVERHERE.JUSTLETTHEMFIGHTITOUTONTHEREOWN.IWOULDEVENGIVEUPOURSEATATTHEU.N.ANDJUSTLETUSBEONOUROWN.PEOPLEMAYBEWALKINGANDRIDINGBIKESTOWORKDUETOLACKOFOIL,BUTWEWILLMANAGE.

* * *

Subject:Anwepossibleterrorattack?From:PeterSandwall(peter@reklamakuten.com)Sent:Wednesday,September11,20023:22AM

DearMr.Presidentortothepersonthatreadsandselectsalltheimportantmailingsenttothisaddress,Iknowit´sthe11ofseptembertodayandyourprobablybusyandalertforanyterroristattactagainstyourinterestaroundtheworld.ButIcan´tstopthinkingofthisprogramontheSwedishtelevisiononthe1:stofspetember.

TheprogramwascalledNovaandwassendinganinterestingpartregardingthebiggestsofarknownwaterwavethattheearthhadhad.Theytalkedaboutit´sdisasterouseffectsandabouttheislandLaPalmawithit´sactivevolkano.ThatIslandhasabigclevishthat´sover30kmwide.Theexpertswasshurethatthe

�I. FEAR FIESTA: POST-9/�� paranoia

volcanowillburstwithinthenext100years.Ifandwhenthiswouldaccour20%oftheislandmightfallorratherraceintotheoceancreatingawavehigherthan650meter-initsinitialstage.

YouprobablyallreadyknowallthisbutifIwasatalibanfanaticlivinginSwedenlookingattheprogramIwouldsendthisinformationfurtherdirecttoalQuidaandBinLadin.

Itwouldbetheperfectterrorattackasitwouldonlytake8hoursforthewavetohittheeastcostofUSA.IdonotknowifyouthinkthisisimportantbutifI,aregularmarriedmanof46,canthinkofthisterrorattacksowillBinLandin.Please,atleastverifytomethatsomeonehasreadandforwardittotherightpersons.

Bestregards,andhopeyousucceedtostrikebackallterrorism!

PeterSandwallSweden.

P.S.Sorryifmyspellingfailssometimes.

* * *

Subject:SecuritybreachesFrom:MichelleFortune(michfortune@aol.com)Sent:Thursday,September12,20023:05PM

I suspect that terrorist affiliates are able to use VA hospital computers to get into the mainframe computers of our government and find out national security informationandthingsofthisnature.ItsjustafeelingIhaveIdonthaveanyproofIjusthaveastrongsuspicion.IthinksomeoneshouldreassesstheVAHospitalscomputersystemstoseehowsecuretheyareandiftheyarecapableofhackingintoourgovernment’smainframefromthatposition.GOODLUCKPresidentBushYouareagoodPresident.Pleasecatchthisdamnconspiracy.IknowothercountriesareinvolvedwiththisplottodestroytheUSbuttouncovertheplotisthehardestjobyoulleverdoinyourlifetime.Godspeedtoyou,sir.

Sincerely,AdedicatedAmericanMother

* * *

Subject:StudentVisasFrom:SaundraSalerno(lousaun@webtv.net)Sent:Friday,September13,200211:03AM

HowhardwoulditbefortheU.S.tomonitortheseVisaand/orIslamstudentssupposedlyattendingclassesatourcollegesanduniversities...andiftheyareNOTattendingclasses,sendthembacktotheirpointoforigin....oriftheyarecitizens,putthemtoworkatMcDonalds?

* * *

Dear Dubya: A Totally Unauthorized Snoop Inside the Presidential Mailbag �

Subject:SniperlinktoextremistgroupFrom:LarryH.Wall2nd(walllh@cox.net)Sent:Thursday,October24,20022:15PM

IjustheardonTVthatpolicewanttosearchaplacetheyarecallinggroundzerodowninalabamabecauseofthesnipershootercamefromthatarea.Policesaythatthecompoundwasknownfortrainingmuslimextremist.IfweknowtheyareMuslimextremistthenwedonotneedthemonourland.Ifthereareanylinkstotheshootertheneveryoneatthatcompoundshouldbearrested.Ithinktheyshouldallbeshot.Wehavetoomanyfreedomsiftheenemycanlivethisfreelyamongustowheretheycaneventrainrighthereamongus.

* * *

Subject:UrgentMessageFrom:NormanPressonMajMSARNGRetired(pbpnip@aol.com)Sent:Tuesday,December03,200210:55AM

I’m a retired Mississippi Army National Guard Officer. Last year I sent the White HouseNoticethatIwasconcernedaboutMissleattacksonCommercialJetsbecausewhenwewerereturningtoKarnack,Texas,fromBarksdaleAirForceBasethereweretwocarsparkedonInterstate20whereplanespassovertheHighwaytolandontherunway.AwomaninAfgantypedressgotoutofthecarinbackandwalkedtothecarinfront.IwouldhavecalltheShreveportPoliceDepartmentatthattime had a Police car not been in front of me. However, since the officer didn’t seemconcernedIletitpass.ButitcontinuedtobothermesoIsentanoticetotheWhiteHouseandtheFBItipline.Weneedtobesurethattheapproachtothe Shreveport Airport is secure before Air Force One is allowed to fly into the ShreveportRegionalAirport.

* * *

Subject:crisesFrom:GeraldKacak(regencyrdf@msn.com)Sent:Sunday,February02,20035:00PM

DearMr.President,IampriormilitaryandcurrentltworkingwithyourhomelandsecuritygroupwiththeUSCoastGuardAux.IbelievethatIcanofferanotheravenueofinvestigationoftheSpacecraftColombia.ItispossiblethatsometerroristmighthavehadadishsetuparoundTexasandjammedtransmissionandcomputersignalsandinsertedavirus.Thisshouldbelookedatasapossibleanswer.Thankyouforthetime.

* * *

Subject:TerroristClandestineBankingFrom:RalphE.Lawrance,Jr(RoknRoll@erols.com)Sent:Wednesday,February05,200312:46PM

Sir, I am a Duty-Disabled Sheriff’s Officer. I recieved at least two e-mails askingmetoset-upbankaccountsforsomeoneelse.Thewriterwantedmeto“”hide”” seventy-five million dollars. I was to be paid about one million dollars

�I. FEAR FIESTA: POST-9/�� paranoia

formyhelp.Idismissedthesee-mailsasridiculousanddeletedthem.IjustsawColinPowellsspeechtotheU.N.council.IfeelIwasremissinmydutybynotreportingtheseofferstoyouinlightofthisspeech.Pleaseforgiveme.ThemedicatiosfortheextremenervedamageIrecievedinthelineofdutyhavedulledmyotherwisesharpinvestigativeskills.

* * *

Subject:scaredFrom:dale(dlehouxsr2002@yahoo.com)Sent:Tuesday,February11,20036:19PM

dearmr.bushiliveinthestateofconnecticutandwearehearingaboutcodeorangeandit’sscaringus.todayontheradiotheyanounceditcodeorangeandhavingthestatepolicetellinguswhattodoincaseofbio-terrorismthisisscaringmeso much i don’t know what to do. united states of america is #1 and finding these terrorist we need to find them right away cause we don’t need all these fellow citizensinanotherpanicandyourdoingagreatjobpresidentbushyourtakingthingsonestepatatime.Myotherfeedbackiswhycan’twejust“”NUKE””themthat’swhatalotofpeoplehereinconnecticutsay.

* * *

Subject:MethodsFrom:VictorKong(victor.kong@gsfdrill.com)Sent:Thursday,April10,20032:34PM

Topreventsuscideattackatcheckpointtoprotectourmanandwomen:

Useacontainerwalkthroughwithsoundspeaker,videocamerasandremoteviewingabout100feetawayfromcheckpoint.HaveoneforWoman&children.OneforManadult.Havethemtostripandputitbackthiercloths.iftheyblewoneup, it cheap to make one more. This is cheap way and fast to outfit one now.

* * *

Subject:ALAConferenceTorontoJuneFrom:viviankowalewski(nblibrary@aol.com)Sent:Monday,May26,200312:02PM

IwishtoinformthepresidentthattheAmericanLibraryAssnhasplanstocontinuewithaConfernceinTorontowherethousandsoflibrariansthroughoutthecountrywillattendandreturnhometointeractwiththepublic.ThepotentialforSARSinfectioncouldbecatastrophictotheU.S.TheboardofALAhasrefused to cancel this conference because of financial loss. I will not attend becausemyhusbandworksinahospitalandIwillnotjeopardizemyself,myfamilyorthehospital.IthoughtthePresidentshouldbeawareofthesituation.

* * *Subject:howtocurbterrorismFrom:billvandergriff(peafowlbill@yahoo.com)

Dear Dubya: A Totally Unauthorized Snoop Inside the Presidential Mailbag �

Sent:Monday,February2,2004at06:07:37

ithinkthattheinternationalairportsshouldbeclosedandjustafewairportsshould be built in states like maine, arizona, flordia and where needed with airforce capabilities on site. then anyone flying over here from overseas would have to go to these airports and then be shuttled from there to thier final destionation.thennoplanescouldbetakenoverandusedasbombsagainstusastheywereonsept.11th.justmythoughtsbill

* * *

Subject:COVERTOPSFrom:DavidDerrick(dnoland@charter.net)Sent:Saturday,April17,2004at00:53:36

Would’ntitbetherightthingtodo,toputanotherdecoyWhiteHouseinanothercountry,andalsoputanotheronthewestcoastincalifornia.Callthemdecoysifyouwill...butkeepthisUnitedstatesofamericaonthemapatallcosts....dontgivethemjustonebuildingtotarget.keepthemguessing...keepthematasafedistance...keepthematalevelwherenoharmmaycometothiscountrynomatterwhatthereplansare....weneedmoredecoytargetstoinsurethesafetyofthisunitedstatesanditsPresidentatallcosts.catchthesubversiveterroristswithdecoystructures.playwiththeredangerousgamesasiftheywithourcountry’ssafety.BuildaDecoyinfrastructure.From...ANAmerican.

* * *

Subject:AIRSHOWFrom:JosephJenkins(yiddle@comcast.net)Sent:Thursday,April29,2004at15:28:55

first let me say im a reg. democrat but i did vote for BUSH and will again wife votedsamehe’stherightmanforthejobokreasonformailsawalotofforeinasainlookingpeopleinky.takeingalotimeanalotofpicturesofHUMVEESoutatairshowtheyhadhummersfrommarinesarmyandanotheronewellmostpeopletake 1 or 2 or 3 pictures these people were takeing a whole roll of film like 27 picturesofeachhummertheyhadthrowawaycameras.weliveincoatesvillePA.wellafterwegotbackwesawonfoxnewsabouthummersgettingblownuplikesomebodyfoundweakspot?maybenothingatallbutthenagainmaybe.idontknowsoithoughtsomeonedowninDC.likeD.RUMMFELDorP.BUSHshouldknow.aboutit.idoknowthatpoliceouttherewereinchoppersandonrooftops,sotheymayhave pictures or film on who may have taken pictures. you can email me back and getmyphoneno.ifyouneedto.

* * *

Subject:IraniantvstationintheirownlanguageFrom:WandaM.Mendillo(gotjesus3200@yahoo.com)Sent:Wednesday,May26,2004at16:20:09

9I. FEAR FIESTA: POST-9/�� paranoia

IamaresidentofVacaville,California.WithinthepastcoupleofweeksarecityisnowairingastationfortheIranianpeopleintheirownlanguage.ThisconcernsmeashowdoweasEnglishspeakingpeopleknowthatthelanguagebeingputonTVintheirnativetongueinscriptaswellasspokenisininnocence?Tomeitseemsa“”nobrainer””thattoallowastationonTVinalanguagewecan’tunderstand,andknowingthatterroistspossiblycouldhaveaccesstoputtingoutcrypticmessagesboththroughthetvstationsaswellasontheInternetchatroomsetc...topassontheirmessagestoothercellmembersoftheirterroistgroup.IsthissomethingperhapstheWhitehouseshouldlookintoandstopinallcitieswhomaybeallowingituntilOsamaBinLadenhasbeenfoundandthisterriblewarisover.Itconcernsmegreatly...itwasnotstoppingSudamHusamewhile Clinton was in office that in my opinion seems to have brought us to this worseningtimeoftheterroismtakingover.ThankyouandGodBlessWanda

* * *

Subject:securityFrom:DeborahPatterson(debpatterson@alltel.net)Sent:Wednesday,May26,2004at20:29:55

IhavebeentovisittheCIAbuildinginLangleyandamconcernedaboutthelevelofsecurityforthosewhoenter.Itwouldbefeasableforthethousandsofterroristswhoareinthiscountrytobreakthroughthesinglebarrierattheentranceand““takeover””thefacility.

* * *

Subject:RingsFrom:WendyLNovak(FlntstLv@aol.com)Sent:Monday,August30,2004at06:22:43

IusetoworkatJewel/OscoinHickoryHills,ILandnextdoortothestorewasadiscountcigarttestorethatopenedup.Well,everyyearmyhusbandandIgotoEvergreenPark,ILtovisitrelativesforChrist.Anyway,IhadcalledtheChicago FBI Office about this and the lady I was talking to was rude and hung up onme.Well,theownersareAraborsomethinglikethat.Inoticedtheybothhadonthesameringsoneday.Iaskedthemwhytheybothhadthesametypeofring,theytoldmenottoworryaboutit,itwassomethingIdidn’tneedtoknowabout.Then,onenightwhenIwasworkinglateInoticedsomeother’sshowingupatthestore,itwasclosedforthedayatthistime,theyallwentintothestoreandintothebackroom.Theytohadthesametypeofringon.I’mwonderingiftheyhave any affiliation with the Taliban? I thought I would let the President know sinceIgotnowherewiththeFBI.It’slikemyhusband’sinsurance,mostofthedr’swentbackovertherebefore9/11.WhenItoldtheFBIaboutthattotheyignoredme.

* * *Subject:11/9reverseonTuesFrom:sherrywest(exbnw@aol.com)Sent:Friday,September10,2004at03:51:03

AmveryconcernedthatSeptember11th,2001wasonaTuesday.Thereverse,11/9of

Dear Dubya: A Totally Unauthorized Snoop Inside the Presidential Mailbag �0

thisyearisalsoonaTuesday.Amnormallyveryremoved,butfoundthisonmyown.

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Subject:AK-47From:LarryLathrop(L-Lathrop@msn.com)Sent:Monday,September20,2004at10:15:04

As a veterian and voter I is still my right to carry any type of firearm. Either forhuntingortoprotecttheU.S.hopefullyitwillnevercomedowntothelater.Ifitdosetheu.s.ingrateswillbegladtheirisstillagroupofu.s.citizens who are still willing to stand and fight for YOUR freedom!

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Subject:areaofconcernFrom:shirleyyoung(ahir33313@aol.com)Sent:Friday,September24,2004at05:14:22

ihaveanareaofconcernwithalloftheterriorsitactivityintheu.s.Iknowamanwhoismylandlord/slumlordwhosaysheisfromEgyptandmyfeelingsarenotverygoodabouthim.Histargetisrealestate.HehaspurchadestonsofpropertyalloverBrowardCountyinFL.Mythingisthathehasnojob.Whoisfundingthemoneyforthis?Certainlynothim.What’sthepurposefortherealestatepirchases?I’mbeginningtobeafraidofhimbecauseheisnotrtght.Hetargetssection8peoplethattheGovernmentassist,Hethreatentogetpeoplekickedoffofsection8housingiftheydon’tcomplywithHisrules.Hesaidallruleshavechanged.Iaskedhimoneday..whatmakeyothinkyoucancomeintothisCountryandchangethings.Hisresponse..IknowwhatIamdoing.Thesearab/egyptiansowneveryconveniencestore,laundrymat,gasstationandnowinoticedsomeprivatelyownedpostalservices’onlybecauseofAmerica-thefreecountry.Thesepeoplehavetakenoverthiscountry..rightunderournosesanddon’tevenrealizeit!backtomyslumlord..HisnameisNABILKISHK..Ithinkheneedtobewatchedcarefully.IfheisinnocentIwillbeokwithhimbutthere’snowaythatasinglepersoncanaffordtobutuosomuchpropertywithoutajob..someonehastobefundingthis..isitforterroristpurposes?Wedon’tknow.IfIsuspectedsomethingandsaidnothingIwillbeatfaultinmyheartbecauseiwassilent.PresidentBushhasastrongholdovertheterroristsituationandifthecommunityseeanythinsthjatmaybesuspiciousweneedtoinformhim.IfyouwouldlikemoreinfoofmysuspicionsmynameisShirleyYoung

again,Icanbewrongbutpleaselet’scheckhimoutincase.

* * *

Subject:schoolsecurityFrom:BrendaMcNeely(bkm63701@hotmail.com)Sent:Saturday,October9,2004at12:18:21

InJanuary03orMarch03IwastravelingI-40fromLittleRockArkansasto

��I. FEAR FIESTA: POST-9/�� paranoia

Memphis.ThereasonI’msureofthesedates,mymotherwasreceivingcancertreatmentinLittleRock.OnI-40towardmemphisInoticedacaravanofaround20schoolbuses.Ithoughttheymusthavebeentransportingstudentsforahugeevent.WhenIbegantopassthemInoticedtherewerenonamesonthesidesandthatallwereempty.Idismisseditandwentonmyway.IvisitforumsfordiscussionandyesterdaysawapostofamanfromTexaswitnessingseveralemptybuseswithnonamesonthemtravelingtogetherinTexas.Henoticedthedriversweredarkskinnedwhichhedismissedasmexican.Becauseofthealertsonschoolshe was very concerned. He did some research to find used buses sell for around 950.00each.IsenthimaposttellinghimIhadwitnessedthesameandgavethetimeframeandhesaidthatwasthetimeofyearhesawthemalso.Intheforumeveryonewassayinghoweasyitwouldbetoloadabuswithexplosivesorhoweasyitwouldbetorunanearlyrouteinthemorningandpickourchildrenupandtakethemhostage.Ihavesentaposttohomelandsecuritysite,FBIandI’malsogoingtoe-mailmycongressman.Ithinkthisisworthinvestigation.Howmanyofthesebuseshavebeenpurchased?Thankyouforyourtimeinthismatter.

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Subject:DearPresident43OurarmorywassoldtoaMuslim.From:annettemtrabucco(annette117@aol.com)Sent:Saturday,May7,2005at09:33:00

DearPresident43OurarmoryinthecityofTonawandaNYwassoldtoaMuslim...IwouldlikeyoutoknowthatIrealizewearenottobepreg.towardsothers.......but,thisisourarmory...And,Iwantyoutoknowthatinlightofwhatisgoingon...Iwantyoutorealizethatitisfrighteningitjustis...acrossthestreetisaconveniencestoreandafamilyofMuslims...justpleaseknowtheyboughtacivilwararmoryourarmoryanditscarsmestillifItoldUbefore...justthethoughthurtsmystomach...pleasehelponthismatter...maybeUcantakeinbackinhomelandsecurityname...sigh...

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Subject: Possible scam $35millionFrom:ChrisStart(luckycat820@hotmail.com)Sent:Wednesday,July13,2005at18:05:33

ItriedtosendanimportantlettertoPresidentBushviaWebmailsystemanditdidn’twork.HeneedstoseethisletterIreceivedviaE-Mail,fromLondonasking me if they can send me $35million US and put it in my account she says her husband was the Chief Security Officer for Sierra Leone.You have to see this letter.She does not want the money detected by US officals.She will give me a percentageifIletherputthemoneyinmyaccount.Shewillalsosendherson,hewillcomeovertoourcountryforinvestment.Pleaseadviseme,shewantsananswerquickly.IhaveherE-MailinfrontofmewithherE-Mailaddress.ThankYou

* * *Subject:terroristsuspectFrom:LindaRing(lindaring12@yahoo.com)Sent:Thursday,August18,2005at08:49:34

Dear Dubya: A Totally Unauthorized Snoop Inside the Presidential Mailbag ��

IamaUSCitizen.IhavemyparentslivinginCanada.TheysuspectthepeopleatthefollowingaddressasterroristslinkedwithAl-QuaidaandOsamaaspeoplewithturbans,longbeardsandallraisingsuspicionareseenmovinginthevicinityItisapublicdisgrace...Canyouinquireintothematterandprotectmyoldparents.Idontknowwhereelsetoraisethematter.

ZainabAhmed/RichardJaved...AllhaveshiftedfromIraqrecently5-42XXXErbStreetWestSuite221,Waterloo,ProvinceofOntarioN2L6K6

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Subject:FellowFarmerFrom:EdwardWalton(anonymous@hotmail.com)Sent:Monday,September26,20056:09PM

YesmynameisEdwardWaltonandi’marancherinNorthDakota.Iknowyourafarmer/rancheryourselfandi’velost27cattleinthelast2weeks,i’mwonderingwhatinthehellisgoingon.Ithinksomeofthemexicansmyneighborhashaveinfectedmycattlewithsomekindofmexicandisease.Couldyoulookinto this? Damn illigals and their bird flu. Can I be paid for my losses? My local representivehasn’treturnedmycalls.

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Subject:alQaedaFrom:AdamB.Yan(abyan2@comcast.net)Sent:Wednesday,November23,2005at22:42:52

IsthealQaedaadvisingthepregnantmuslimwomentohavetheirbabiesintheU.S.asalongrangeplan?Ataparty,IheardsomebodymentionthatthereisanincreasingnumberofArabicwomenfromthemiddleEasthavingtheirbabiesheretotakeadvantageoftheautomaticU.S.citizenship.Whenthesebabiesareoldenoughtobeterrorists,theycaneasilyreturntotheU.S.asAmericancitizenswithAmericanpassports!

* * *Subject:spyingonamericansFrom:JacquelineBowers(red.bowers@us.army.mil)Sent:Tuesday,December20,2005at11:31:31

Mr.President,MyhusbandjustreturnedfromKuwaittobeinshockaboutthewayamericansaretakingallofthisterroriststuff.Myfatherisalsoamilitaryman.Andweallagreethatallofthesepeoplethatarecomplainingaboutthespyingissuemusthavesomethingtohideortheywouldn’tbefussing.Wecouldcarelessifthegovernmentsetupavideocameraatourhouse.AtleastIknowIwouldbeprotected.Theintruderswouldeventhinktwiceifwewerewatchedovera little more closely. And if all this fighting could have been prevented we would callyouGod.Youaredoingawonderfuljob.There’smoreoutherethatbelieveinyouthanyouknow.Thankyouforyourtime.

* * *Subject:HomeLandSecurity

��I. FEAR FIESTA: POST-9/�� paranoia

From:SylviaHarris,GooseCreek,SC29445Sent:Sunday,January22,2006at20:42:46

MosthairsupplyshopsinGooseCreekareownedbypeopleofmiddleeasternraces.Theseshopschangestheirpersonnelfortheentireshopevery6months.Why?Arethesepeopleon6monthsvisa’s?Thisisastrangewaytooperateabusiness.Gasstationsandhotelsareownbywhatappearbynon-Americans.Youcanshutcitiesdownandbybuyingchemialslegallybombscanbemadelegally.WeliveveryclosetoNavalWeapon’sStation.Thisisscary.Checkoutthesenewhairbusinessandownersandtheycanbuylegalchemicals.

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Subject:DearPresidentBushFrom:MarcoOrlandi(lorlandi@telkoms.net)Sent:Saturday,April15,2006at01:02:28

DearPresidentBush,

Iamconcernedthatterroristsaregoingtousesubversivetacticstodestroyfamilyunitsonabigscale,Ifeelthatthesepeoplearegoingtoseveralltheirtieswithreligionandreligiousorganizationsandaregoingtosecurepositionsofresponsibilitywithinpublicserviceorganizationssuchascommunications.Theirobjectivewillbetodisruptfamiliesandtodestroythemcompletely. They will do this subversively by infiltrating communications between familymembers,usingvoicechangersandothertechnology,Theywillrecruitvirileandattractivemalestoseduceanddestroyfamilyunits.

Thefamilyisthefoundationofsocietyandournextlineofdefenseneedstobetheprotectionandstrengtheningofthefamilyunit.

ThankyouforbeingsuchanunderstandingPresident.

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Subject:Urgent!!From:Luzanne(luzanne.vanderschyff@gmail.com)Sent:Sunday,May28,2006at03:20:43

ANigeriancontactedme,hisnameisProff.CharlesCSoludo,wellsohesaid...HesaidthatheisfromCBNandheisworkingwithPres.Bushtopaycontractorsback.SincemyMomtoldmeaboutNigerianguysmarryinggirlswithoutthemknowing,I’malittlepaniced.HehassomeofmyinformationbutnotmyI.D.number.Ijustwanttoknowifhe(Charles)isspeakingthetruth.Iwouldbeveryrelievedifyoucanhelpmeinthismatter!!Thankyouveryverymuch.

* * *Subject:WaronTerrorFrom:DanielLunsford(dannbet@earthlink.net)Sent:Sunday,August06,200610:08AM

Sirisitpossibletosendsubliminalmessagesthroughthetelevisionthatthe

Dear Dubya: A Totally Unauthorized Snoop Inside the Presidential Mailbag ��

Islamicpeoplewatchandintroduceintotheirsubconsciouspeaceandlovetocounterthehatetaughttothem.Iamsuresomeoneotherthanthepresidentwillreadthis,buttomeitisveryimportantandItrullywishsomeoneofthepowerstobewillgivethissomethought.Thankyou.

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Subject:AreWeProtectingOurUndergroundSystemsAgainstTerroristAttacks?From:TrevGolden(goldenbeauty1stplace@yahoo.com)Sent:Saturday,August12,20062:04AM

DearMr.PresidentBush,Recently,I’vebeenhavingterribledreamsaboutterroristgainingaccesstoourseweragesystemsoflargeurbanareas.Idreamedtheyhavebeensecretelyconnectingbombstodestroyusinthatmethod.Isourgovernmentpayingattentiontothisareaofourland?Ihavebeenhavingthisnightmareforacoupleofyearsnow...Ijustdidn’tknowhowtocontactyoubeforehand.IamgladyouhavethiswebsiteavailabletoU.S.Citizenssowecantellyouwhat’sonourmindsandhowwefeel.Well,Ifeelthiscouldbeapossiblesourceofterrorismfromtheseevilpeople--attackingusunderground....pleaselookintothisifyouhaven’talready...theywilldoanythinganywheretodestroyus....andIfeelthatthiscouldbeanothermethodoftheirstohurtus.Thanks,Mr.President.....fromTrevGoldeninMinnesota.

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Subject:ThelatestterroristplansFrom:FredrikJohansson(fredrikclinton@hotmail.com)Sent:Saturday,August12,20063:34PMHi.MynameisFredrikandIcomefromSweden.Isn´tittimetostopallarabsfrom flying. The only way to stop terror is if the arabs themselfs stop there “brothers”. Stop all arabs from flying and going on public transportation, anditwillresolvitself.Ofcoursetherewillbealotofinternationalprotestandnamecalling,buthowlongcantheonestarabslivewhithoutpublictransportation.Godblessamericaandyourwaragainstterrorism.

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Subject:newtaxesandagenciesFrom:anthonyzuchowski(anrthonyzuchowski@aol.com)Sent:Monday,August21,20065:44PM1.everyoneshouldhavealicensetousetheinternet.2.blockanyonewithquestionablebackround.3. all internet connection should use eye scan and finger prints4. keyboards should confirm that the typist is the user.5.allemailsshouldbechargedjustlikemail.\6.usethaeextramoneytohelppayforthingsthepresidentneedstosecureourboardersandairports.

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