This book is lovinglydedicated to you - and all

the other women strugglingwith stress, overwhelm,anxiety, and depression.

I know your story, as it was mine.Please know you are not alone, despitewhat that pesky voice in your head is

telling you right now.Love her, for she’s just scared you might

someday find the answers you seek.

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Table of Contents

Introduction 4

Step 1 – Kicking Your Stress To The Curb 11

Step 2 – Stop Torturing Yourself 16

Step 3 – Discover Your Life Purpose 27

Next Steps – Putting It Into Practice 32

About Me 35

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IntroductionHow this book can help YOU

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Would it be fair to say that you are currentlyfeeling stuck, miserable, worried about yourfuture, and totally lost about what to do aboutit?

That you hate your life and just don't knowwhat your first step needs to be in order tochange it?

That your first thought every morning is pleaselet today be less terrible than yesterday, andthat your last thought before falling asleepevery night is please let tomorrow be betterthan today?

That you hate going to work, hate going out,hate being at home, hate being alone andbeing with others sets your teeth on edge?

That you basically hate being inside your skin?

How awful would it be if the rest ofyour life were just like yesterday?

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If this is you, it’s time to stop punishingyourself. It’s time to start living the life youwere meant for – right now.

Are you tired of playing head gameswith yourself?

This three-step process is for you if you’re:

• Tired of feeling stuck in stress, overwhelmand misery

• Tired of reading all the self-help books,buying all the online courses, and nothaving any of it work for more than a hotminute

• Tired of trying to find the motivation andconsistency that will get you out of themisery of stress and overwhelm

I get it, I was there too. That's how I createdmy three-step system – out of desperationwhen nothing else worked.

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I needed to reduce my stress, stop myoverwhelm, stop the negative voice in myhead, and learn to find my bliss, and therewas really nothing out there that did all thosethings in one easy-to-do package. So I gotcreative and mixed and matched until I foundthe secret recipe that works for both me andall my clients.

Let's rewind back to 2016 for a minute, if Imay.

I was done. I had spent my entire life cyclingthrough stress / overwhelm / drama /trauma, over and over (and over!) again, and Idesperately needed to finally find a way tostop the madness for good.

My life was on the line – I had triggered anauto-immune disease that tanked the onebright spot in my life, my career, and that wasthe moment I decided I was done being thevictim of my life. I refused to lie down anddie.

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I knew I needed to change my life. It was timeto stop:

• Making shitty choices that felt awful• People pleasing and giving my power away• The raging perfectionism that was keeping

me overwhelmed• The nasty voice in my head

I needed to let go of my past stories -especially the really awful ones; from a badhome life and being bullied as a kid, to beingin abusive relationships, to having a spousedisappear into PTSD, I had a lot of terriblememories to release.

I had to learn to become my own best friendinstead of my worst enemy. It was time tolearn who I was. I had spent a few years inmy teens and early twenties starting this work,but it was time to get serious and stop thecycle once and for all.

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I did a ton of research, and through a processof trial and error, I found the right combinationof tools to get my stress under control forgood.

Once I had my stress managed, I needed tostop the negative overwhelming thoughts, so Idid the same process for that. And it workedlike a hot damn. Things were definitely lookingup! But, now that I wasn't overwhelmedanymore, I noticed that something was stillmissing. Life seemed a bit dull and bland, andit was boring. I needed to find my reason tojump out of bed in the morning – I needed tofind something that would make me trulyhappy. I needed to find my bliss.

So, off I went searching for the magic elixirthat would grant me happiness and joy - blisseven! Instead, I found a simple tool that mademy life purpose absurdly easy to find. Ittransformed my life completely, and I finallyhad the whole recipe.

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I was so excited! I told my friends and familywho were also stuck in that same cycle, whotried it too, and it worked just as well forthem. I knew I needed to share this with theworld – it was too important to keep it asecret.

I created this guide just for you, and what I'mgoing to teach you are the steps to reducingyour stress, stopping your overwhelm, andfinding your happiness.

Read on to find out how easy it can be toreduce your stress without triggering youranxiety or overwhelm, and without the guiltabout missing a day. What to do when yourthoughts are overwhelming you. And, 1 simpletool you can use to discover your life purposeand find your happiness and bliss.

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This three-step system works so well becauseyou get massive clarity on what you reallywant, which motivates you to make thechanges you need to make to get you whereyou want to go. You break through the barriersthat are holding you back, so you can treatyourself like your own best friend, trust yourintuition, and be present in every moment.And, you discover the tools to maintain yournew lifestyle for the rest of your life.

What would happen if you learned to maintainhealthy boundaries, stop the perfectionism, andshow up as your true self?

You'd become a total badass! You'd discoverwho you are, and learn to truly love yourself.

What if it was as easy as 1 – 2 – 3?

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Step 1Kick Your Stress To The Curb

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You already know you need to reduce yourstress level in order to stay healthy and sane,but most of the strategies out there seem toactually make our anxiety and overwhelmworse – which makes the stress worse too!And don’t even get me started on the guiltwhen you inevitably miss a day or forgetbriefly...

Consider this list to be a jumping off point, togive you some ideas that will help you decidewhat will work best for you. Move betweenthem as your life progresses. Don’t forget todo #3 if you feel like you messed somethingup!

#1 Take time for self-care

• Meditation - Meditation is nature's resetbutton. It's super healthy, amazinglyrelaxing, and can be done by anybody,anywhere. Silent, guided or musicallyaccompanied, there's a meditation stylefor everyone. Give it a try!

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• Exercise - Being told to exercise israther like being told to eat yourveggies...you know it's the right thing todo, but it feels impossible to fit intoyour day. I promise it's worth it, and it'sas easy as dancing in the aisles whileyou grocery shop!

• Journal - Putting pen to paper (orfingers to keyboard, or voice to audioclip) is empowering, enlightening, andjust all around satisfying as hell. Thesimple act of checking in with yourselfevery day, and writing down yourmusings, gives you so much clarity.

• Sleep - A quality bedtime routine is keyto conquering stress and overwhelm.Soothing music, meditation, journaling,warm milk, a lovely bath, checking in onyour vision board, and so much more,are all a good part of this most sacredpart of the day.

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#2 Stop people pleasing

Ugh. People pleasing - AKA the slow,tortured death of the soul. We know weneed to stop it, but it just feels impossiblesometimes. Saying NO is free. It's alsofreeing. Gather your courage and just sayno.

#3 Talk nicely to yourself

You are the only YOU that you are everlikely to have - so be nice! Stop lettingyour inner mean girl run the show, and bekind to yourself. I like to say: treat yourselfas if you were your own best friend -because you are!

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#4 Focus on what you can control

The definition of insanity is doing the samething over and over again and expecting adifferent result. It's time to stop obsessingover things you can't control and changethe things you can. Trust me, your stresslevel will thank you.

#5 Make laughter a priority

Laughter truly is the best medicine, somake sure you are getting your daily dose!Spend at least some time every day doingsomething that feels fun, engaging, andmakes you laugh and smile. Doctors orders!

I’ve created a beautiful Mood Tracker that youcan use to start ensuring that you areredirecting your attention towards the activitiesthat will support your mental health. You canfind it at:https://tranquilitysoulspa.com/moodtracker

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Step 2Break Free Of Self Hate

& Be Your Best Self

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Break your mind free from the overwhelm thatcomes from overthinking.

When was the last time you let your negativethoughts take over and ruin a situation? Howabout spinning out of control for seemingly noreason?

It's time to stop torturing yourself.

Learn to recognize, question, and release yourunhelpful thoughts as they come up so thatthey don't overwhelm you.

Let’s start learning to recognize your unhelpfulthoughts. There are 7 broad categories everyunhelpful and negative thought can be putinto. I’ve listed them below, along with theirmain characteristics.

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#1 Predicting the future

When we feel anxious it is common for us tospend much of our time thinking about thefuture and predicting what could go wrong asopposed to just letting things be. In the end,most of the predictions we've made don'tactually happen, and we've wasted time andenergy being worried and upset about them.For example: You predict the future byassuming that you'll perform poorly at a jobinterview, or, you assume that someone willreject you before you’ve even asked them fora favor!

When was the last time you predicted thefuture in an unrealistic or unhelpful way?

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#2 Mind reading

This is when we assume that we know whatother people are thinking (usually about us)without any real evidence to suggest it's true.We can also make assumptions about whysomeone said something or behaved in acertain way and be quick to conclude that it'sabout us.

For example: 'My boss thinks I'm stupid!' Or,'my friend is ignoring me', but really he/she isjust busy with other things.

When was the last time you made anassumption or jumped to a conclusion aboutwhat someone else was thinking without anyreal evidence to suggest it was true?

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#3 Catastrophizing

People commonly 'catastrophize' when they'reanxious. This is when we blow thingscompletely out of proportion and view thesituation as a catastrophe even though theproblem is actually quite small.

For example: Assuming someone hates youbecause they didn’t reply to your text within 10seconds. Or, you expect to lose your jobbecause of a simple mistake that you’ve made.

When was the last time that you blewsomething completely out of proportion in yourmind?

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#4 Focusing on the negatives

When we're anxious, we commonly develop'tunnel vision,' where we focus solely on thenegative aspects of a situation withoutconsidering the positives. Sometimes the wholepicture can be colored by a single negativedetail.

For example: Focusing on the one person whodoesn’t like you rather than the other twentywho do.

When was the last time you focused more onthe negatives than on the positives?

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#5 Overgeneralizing

Based on one instance in the past or present,you make the assumption that your entirefuture will follow a similar pattern. A sense ofhelplessness often accompanies such overgeneralizations.

For example: Just because one ex-partnercheated on you, you believe that ‘ALL MEN (orWomen) ARE BAD!’

How did you feel about yourself (or the world),the last time that you overgeneralized asituation or a group of people?

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#6 Imagining the worst case scenario

Where we make predictions that the worstcase scenario is going to happen, despite thefact that we may have been successful in thisarea in the past.

For example: You're asked to give apresentation to a group of people, and youthink 'I'm going to get in there and completelymess this up' even though you've given manysuccessful presentations in the past.

How did you feel the last time you imaginedthe worst case scenario of either a situation orset of circumstances you were facing?

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#7 Labelling

When we 'label' ourselves based on ourbehavior in specific situations, we defineourselves by one specific behavior (usually anegative behavior) and fail to consider otherpositive characteristics and actions.

For example: 'I'm always anxious' even thoughthis is not always the case, or 'I'm not goodenough' because you failed at something, eventhough there are many other things that you'regood at.

What labels do you currently define yourselfby and are they complimenting your life? Ifnot, which ones do you need to 'ditch'?

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Now ask yourself, How do you feel after doingany of these things? What would havechanged if you hadn't gone there?

So, the next time you find yourself stuckthinking an unhelpful thought, use thefollowing questions to figure out what’s reallygoing on. They should help you come up witha more balanced or rational view of thethought, and of the situation in general. Withpractice, this can become an incrediblyeffective tool for self-reflection, understanding,and thought management.

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1) Is there substantial evidence for mythought?

2) Is there evidence contrary to my thought?

3) Am I trying to interpret this situation withoutall the evidence?

4) What would a friend think about thissituation?

5) If I look at the situation positively, how is itdifferent?

6) Will this matter a year from now? Howabout five years from now?

Use these questions to help you quickly snapout of a funk. I’ve created a gorgeousbookmark, listing all of the six reflectionquestions above, to assist you withremembering them. You can download it at:https://tranquilitysoulspa.com/bookmark

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Step 3Discover Your Life Purpose

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What is your real, true life purpose?

I’m not talking about your job, your dailyresponsibilities, or even your long term goalshere. Those are nice, but they aren’t yourreason for being.

Why are you actually here?

I mean the REAL reason you’re here. The veryreason you exist.

Now, perhaps you don’t believe you are herefor a purpose or that life has meaning. Itdoesn’t matter. Not believing in your purposewon’t bar you from discovering it, just like notbelieving in gravity won’t keep that apple fromfalling off the tree. All it will do is make it takelonger to happen.

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So, just in case I’m right and there is a reasonyou are here, let’s do a fun exercise to see ifyou can discover your true purpose in life....

You need to empty your mind of all the thingsyou THINK (or have ever thought) about yourpurpose. Ditch them, and explore. Give yourselfabout an hour on your own to dedicate to thisexperience (it will likely not take that long, butit’s better to not interrupt the flow).

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1. take out a blank sheet of paper, or open aword processor (word, google docs, etc)

2. write 'what is my true purpose in life' at thetop

3. write the first answer that pops into yourhead; it doesn’t have to be a sentence or bewhat you expected

4. repeat step 3 until you write the answerthat makes you surge with emotion and cry –this is your purpose!

That’s it.

It doesn’t matter who you are or what you dofor a living. It may make sense or it may seemstupid, but usually , it takes about 15 to 20minutes to clear your head of the socialconditioning and the expectations of thosearound you.

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Some general guidelines for using thistechnique:

• Feel free to start at “I don’t have apurpose” or “life is meaningless” if you arestumped. Go from there.

• False answers will come from your mindand your experiences, but when the trueanswer arrives, it will feel like it’s comingto you from a different source entirely. Ifyou are less aware of who you are, it maytake longer. If you are more aware of whoyou are, it may take less time.

• It’s okay to write down similar or identicalanswers, to head off on wild and weirdtangents. Just keep going until you hit theanswer that makes you cry.

• You may find yourself resisting this process,and your brain may find ways to distractyou. Keep going.

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• You may find a few answers that almostmake you cry, but not quite – keep going!Highlight those answers as you go alongso you can go back and generate newthreads branching off from them. Eachreflects a piece of your purpose, but theyaren’t the complete purpose. Those are theanswers that are bringing you closer toyour true purpose.

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Next StepsPutting It Into Practice

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Congratulations!

You now have some great tools to combatyour stress, some questions to ask that willhelp you shake your overwhelm, and you nowknow your life purpose. These are all huge firststeps towards finally shifting from stressed outto blissed out, so take some time to celebrate!You’ve come a long way.

You may be asking yourself

“Okay, but what do I do first / next / rightnow?”

There are probably a few questions swirlingaround in your head, such as:

• How to truly implement these ideas• How to really motivate yourself to maintain

this new and improved you• What to do when you have a setback

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Now, the real work begins – building on whatyou’ve learned here and really cementingthese changes in place, to ensure you createlasting change that leaves you loving yourselfand your life for good.

Let’s implement a plan, together, to get youthere – with ease!

Schedule some time in my calendar to talkabout how I can help you figure out your nextsteps. It’s a FREE call, to help you suss outyour best path forward and tackle anythingthat comes up. If you decide you want tolearn more about working with me in one ofmy programs, great, we can have thatconversation, but if not, we can just talk aboutwhat you need to focus on next in your life.

You can book your FREE call here:

https://tranquilitysoulspa.com/booknow/

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Not quite ready for the commitment of a freecall yet? I get it! Let’s get to know each othera bit better in my FREE Facebook Group, TheShift: From Stressed Out To Blissed Out first. Ioffer some great tips on how to get startedputting these steps into place in your lifethere.

Join us here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/tranquilitysoulspa/

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About MeWho Am I, And Why I Wrote

This Book

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I’m your Bliss Guide, SheriSutherland,

And I know your struggle intimately – Idesperately wanted to be the “with it” girl.

You know the one. She’s always perfectly puttogether, looks amazing, and nothing morethan a light breeze ever ruffles her feathers.She cooks like a dream, and everything iseffortless and easy. It seems like she doesn’thave to do more than just think aboutsomething, and she gets it.

God, I had a love-hate relationship with her.

That was definitely NOT me. Not by a longshot. Instead, my life story is the treadmill fromhell. I was the “hot mess” gal. Maybe you canrelate to her?

From a toxic home life to being bullied inschool, from a series of abusive relationshipsto a failed marriage, and just not ever feeling

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able to truly connect at a deeper level withanyone, my life was a hot mess of stress,anxiety, depression, poor boundaries, andterrible relationships. I felt like everything I did was sub-par, thatsuccess was always just out of reach, and thatI must have done something absolutely awfulin a past life to deserve so much misery inthis one. There’s no way all of this was justthe luck of the draw, right? Basically...

It sucked.The only bright spot through my life had beenthe fact that I had a fabulous career that Iwas really good at, and then when I got sickwith an auto-immune disease, that was gonetoo.

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When my career was gone, let me tell you,my whole world felt shattered. It dropped meyet again into the pit of despair, stress, andanxiety (you know the one!) Sadly, it wasn’t myfirst, second or even third visit to that pit. Weare old friends.

I’ve overcome a lot in my life, and if I was alesser woman, it would have broken me along time ago. But, I am nothing if notdetermined. I kept digging myself out over andover and over again, only to have the nextoverwhelming event destroy all my hard workall over again.

At the darkest moment in my life, after losingmy marriage, my career, and my identity as ahealthy person, I realized one thing. If I wasgoing to get out of this pit of despair, stress,and anxiety for good, I needed to find mybliss.

Bliss is definitely not something I've had sinceI was a kid – it wasn't even in my vocab! Howon earth was I supposed to find it? I spent the

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next few years reading everything I could getmy hands on related to being happy insidemyself again - finding my bliss.

I came to realize I first needed to stop theoverwhelming voices in my head and reducemy stress, which would allow me to slowdown enough to find my true purpose. I kepton searching until I finally found the secretformula that worked for me, for my friends,and now for my clients. Once I found the wayto have these three things in my life, I foundmy bliss.

I was so successful at using this three-stepformula that now I teach women just like myold self how to use it for themselves, to getthe same amazing results.

Stop asking yourself why the f*ck you're here,and start asking yourself how the f*ck youwant to feel. Bliss should be a huge part ofyour life, and I can show you how to find it.

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COME JOIN US

You can book your FREE planning call here:

https://tranquilitysoulspa.com/booknow/

Not quite ready for the commitment of a freecall yet? I get it! Let’s get to know each othera bit better in my FREE Facebook Group first.

Join us here:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/tranquilitysoulspa/

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