A SeIIIEWHALE R @ P U + A B L E N B W S R A O P U B L I S H E D I N + H E UNDERCILEY

Issue 6 Year 1 - Second Week of Accordant

SYLVANIA-The mwchanta of deqcdon by of the guild of Sylvania offered its local Fuffas, canes after days highesi position today to ayone of sporadic brawls and ria& who can quell the unrest ln the that has c l a i d twelve lives and gate-town and enwrre the d & y damaged kips throughout the of the medmm and heii burg.

Ihis offer, seen aa an act

CUE f i KW FLA-HEY 3 TZJAE CULT

~1~1~--severa l fires ;ere sated yesterday morning in and around the Hive Ward allegedly by agents of a prime world cult called the zantacom. The fma caused wi- panic and demwtion, though few berks inside the Hive seemed to Mtice or care. Harmonium patrols iavwt- igated several of the arson sitea after quelling the fm but scragged no sqmts. Later in the day, however, several humm pr im were anwted new the hive on uroun charges and, though no word has come fran the G u m , chant on the dark of the f in s is abundant.

Several cuUers SIGIS spoke with believed that the flew

&re a diversion tha; enabled the cult to appmhend a Bannuai who was seen inthe Cage the day before yesterday w i n g a large lead-bound box. Conina Stormweather, a Sensate who had poken with the samurai, told SIGIS that, "Mr. Mount- ain [the stmumi] is not at libeay to discuss the contents of his package. 'lhis is a political matter of the prime world of 'Ikil and of nu concern to thepeople of S i . " Nonetheless, rumours about the box persist as does the chant that a baatezu patrol roaming t h e O u t h d s ~ A u t o m a t a i s looking for a box that fits the descliption of the one &ed bvthesamurai. tar)

Jd TDJyDdJdt7 J d c J p ~ d 7 - THREE MEMBERS of the All three were d i i e r e d Sign of One faction died last dead invarioua rooming h w w nighi in what are dwribed by this morning, apparently poi- investigating officer Rofary soned with the same toxin. Tens, a Mover Four in the Mover Tons told cullers, 'One Hamomm, aa "situations ofa of the main problems with Highly ~ ~ c i o u s nature." invest ige m c s involving

The three individuals, who Signers is that they're all so apparently did not all know one arrogant and antisocial that they another, were all p r e m in the never have fie-& to corrob- Centre of S i , a tavern adj- '-whatactually happened." acent to the Council Chambers Mwer Tens later apologiaed frequented by Ac- for his comments, as he did not cording to eyewitnesse-, they d s e they were onthe record. wcw not all present sMtan- Thelhmoniumhavenotma& -sly, and they all connuned publio their suspicions on the hfferent foods anddrinks. nature or motive of the attack.

(iw)

he hole-, initiaiy spar- ked by the riot that placed a high-up merchant's daughter in the dead book, conhues to shake the town though effolts by the Seven have finally begun to show results. Scragged sods are being placed in the public stocks ortiedtothepostandflogged, dependjng on the severity of

- their offence. M ~ o n and Pain, two of the Sevm spiritors, have also assumed new hosts, occupying the bodies of two of the more severe offendem. Reflection, another spiipiritor of

the Seven, addressed the assembled merchants and warnedthatany aaemptstouse violence within the M e s of Sylvania, even if only to 'restore the peacen, wwld be m e r w i t h a s n o l c h t o l ~ a s the rioters. He went on to reassure all those preset that the Seven "...have not abandoned our porn" and would reStOTe order in due time. After Reflection's specoh, a relatively unknown miter named Harlan Stillwater questioned bfloct- ion, asking if negotiated moans of restoring order were permis- sible. The Spiritor seemed surprised by the question, and said hc surely had no objections to aptawful d~mnt.

'I have no idea what he [Still- wa(w1 expects," said Anaxer the Quick, a local leather mer-chant, 'ibwifhethinkshe'sgoingtobe able to rattle his b b v x tit these leathemeads and get them to act all peacelid like, well, he's g o t a l w t h e r t h i n p ~ . "

'well, for what Its worth s still water]'^ been spending a lot of time on the Prime", chimed in Larinda Evenhome, a silk merchant in Sylvania. "1 don't know what barmy scheme Harlan's cooked up, but I don't think he's just rattling his bone-box." - Mammto Di

~eIla,cuUer 0

FAUNEL-The newly formed Spireward Trading Co. an- d they will CommelDce operations in Paunel within the week. Spireward is particularly interested in exploiting the forest for the decorative wood known as 'pulpleheart' and they alwplrrntvdvagouddd of fur hunting around Faunel. Dwarven workmen in Faunel have already restored the squat, t W ~ ~ , whib StVIle b m - ure that Spireward will use as their headquarters. Work gangs, consisting mostly of bashem recruited from the Hive, are woxking to c1w the forest for a logging road and lumbermill. 'lb Spireward Trading Co.

was f d by Lambert wky- wteafterhetumbledontoa portal that provided reliable access to both the Cage and Tradegate. Sulprisingiy, Wrath (theguardianofthegatetothe Beastlands and the ostedble ruler of Faunel) has given the endeavour the nod despite concorns of the residents of the burg, Particularly Errol Green- leaf a druid highup in Faunel.

Bcfm wrath permitted S p b w d t o ~ t h e f o m s t s ~ Faunel, End and Lambee argued extensively before Wrath, eachpleadingthelcase.

Amding to witnesses, over thr: came of the dkwIwivn it became obvious that Greenleaf and Whycote thought each othx balmy longbefm they finishedrnalingtheiibone- boxes. F i y , only when Master Whycote swore he would ensure that no pettioner would be harmed by his trapping operation (and that he would personally place a bounty on the head of anyone hunting petitioners) Wrath allowed the operation to prweed.

Errol Greenleaf was shocked by the decision and swore to fight Spireward's logging and trapping operations. "The for- est is not theirs to eradicate as they will, nor are the animals of the forest. Spireward should notbehere,notforwwdor h ides ,andIwi l l f ight to~e that they get neithex. "

-Donald Kyng, culler Inn)

I ATTENTION! I CULLERS

5.1. G.I[.~. MUST BE LITERATE AND O N THE CASE

1 ~pplicants should contact the Editor, Scott Kclley I

MODRmS MARCH THHOLIGH S'tEFOI Ste-Foi residents on Mount Celestia were taken by surprise last week when the Modron March up nd decided to t a h a path through their town to got to the Excelsior Gate off their shores, taking a

route agreed upon centuries ago. Problem is, the street plans have changed since then! Even the help of some cutters from Sigil wasn't enough to stop the devastation. According to acting mayor Chaudronborn, the help of Wing Bow, Cough and Lisander won't be quickly forgotten. That's Mount Cslestia for you, never an ingrate in the bunch.

Sigil’s Independent Global Information Service

Second Week of Accordant

NewsChant

Baron Paracs SurvivesAssassination AttemptRIBCAGEAn attempt onthe life of Lord Quentil Paracswas foiled today by the quickblade of Fritz von Turmstadt,the only son of Lord Peltar vonTurmstadt, a leading senator ofRibcage. According to witness-es, the assassin, posing as aserving woman, struck at LordParacs with an envenomedblade during a private audien-ce. Success was riven from heras Fritz took her hand off with alightning draw of his sword.

The assassin, identified as amember of the Band of theSable Star a notorious ring ofcross-traders and assassins,was a trusted member of LordParacss household and hertreachery came as a shock tothose who knew her. LordParacs has ordered a full andthrough investigation of hisentire household staff.While drawing a blade in the

presence of Lord Paracs usu-ally earns only a quick death of

the perpetrator, the Lord ofRibcage has instead decided toreward the heroism of LordTurmstadt. Specifically, LordParacs honoured Lord Turm-stadts petition to place em-bassies of the upper-planar gatetowns within the von Turm-stadt section of the city. Anotherhigh-up senator in the burg,Lord Tandon von Hapstan, isexpected to protest the decision.When asked how he mana-

ged to draw his blade soquickly, Fritz told SIGIS thathe was motivated primarily byfear, mostly of the politicalramifications of Lord Paracssdeath. Could you imagine thechaos that would result shouldLord Paracs be killed?, saidTurmstadt. The wolves wouldbe fighting over the baronialseat before his body hit thefloor. Given the choice bet-ween Lord Paracs and civilwar, I side with Lord Paracs.

Eber Willburg, culler(rm)

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IGIL

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AUNEL

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LORIUM

NOTHING

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IBCAGE

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YLVANIA

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HOTH S EALM

PS

Citizens are advised to stay in-doors as smog becomes thickerthroughout the day. Slightly causticrain in the evening.

Weather can be expected tostay calm for today, next week, nextmonth, next year

Expect precisely 0.5 inchesof rain today and tomorrow. Winds willbe in a gateward direction at a speed of10 mph, which will increase to 11 mphat 6 oclock anti-peak.

The gate to Pandemonium hasbeen letting more of the plane throughof late. Expect winds of up to 80 mphand deafening noise. Citizens areadvised by the Bleak Cabal to dowhatever the hell they were doingpreviously since theres nowhere elsefor them to go We recommend thattravellers postpone any journeys thereor equip themselves with winterclothing and earplugs.

Acid rain predicted for the restof the week. Stay indoors.

Hot, bright, traditional Ex-celsiorian summer. Perfect weather forriding. The annual tournament looksset to be successful, again

Light drizzle expected from 4-5 anti-peak. Experiments caused by theWind Duke Reluthon may cause someturbulence so devas are advised to stayon the ground.

Two days away from the wetseason so all bipedal civilised racesshould have sought shelter or vacatedthe Gate-Town by now. All sentientpigeons should avoid Wrath for a fewdays, hes not particularly happy withyou right now, and neither are thechimpanzees after spending two hoursscrubbing him clean

Warm weather thanks tothe Towns proximity to Excelsior,mellowed by the winter currentlyendured by Tradegate. Nothingparticularly special, although residentsmay wish to stay within the walls, sincewinds around the town have risensomewhat

Icy winds all the way fromMuspellheim mean that its perfectweather to go out and do something.Theres nothing like a bracing breezefor making a man of someone, even awoman any bizarre weatherconditions are the result of in-terference from Gzemnids realm andhave to do with the fact thatthey assigned a Xaositect as localplanologist

Rain. Endless bloody drizzlePlague-Mort: All citizens are ordered tostay indoors. At 1:00 Peak the streetswill be swept by flame-spellers as partof the Arch-Lectors attempt to cutdown on vagrancy.

Expect periodic fireballs in thesky all day, and sulphurous fumes forthe rest of the week

1:00 to 3:00 peak: Slight Drizzle.3:00 to 3:10 peak: Rain of Scrap Metalfrom Acheron. Stay indoors. 3:15onwards: As previously scheduled.

Hot and sunny. Party on! (Orriot as the casemay be)

Temperatures remain high. Ex-cessive pollution from chimneys willleave the place feeling like a smoke-filled glasshouse. Expect Lowries laterin the day. Stay indoors, and if possible,avoid breathing.

Temperatures remain justabove freezing, so as to permit growthof Winter luxury commoditiesindustries. Furs recommended.

Stay indoors, or wear a very hardhat. Weve had anvil rain over here. Itmight rain anvils again tomorrowmaybe this time itll rain upwards. CanI come home now, please? The skysturned upside down and there areclouds on the ground

Plenty of wind and rain, asusual. Daghdas had a funny turnagain

Usual blistering heat.Loose clothing recommended. Also,plague of frogs predicted by localplanologist.

Outlands WeatherA LIGHTHEARTED look at the weather on the Outlands

by SIGIS resident planologists

Harmonium DignitaryKilled by Freak WeatherXAOS

(ps)

The barely recognis-able remains of Harmoniumhigh-up Granus Hokok werediscovered in the aftermath of arain composed of anvils andbrown spherical fruit whichdevastated the gate-town ofoXas yesterday for approx-imately six minutes. A spokes-man for the Harmonium con-demned the town of osXa forencouraging the type of chaosthat results in anvil/fruit stormsand has informed SIGIS that awar with osaX is imminent, assoon as the bloody burg sits stilllong enough for us to invade.Xaositects living in Aoxs

have refused to commentintelligibly on the incident,many choosing instead to

squawk like a gang of Arboreanmilligibbons while otherspreferred to yell Nyang,nyang, nyang through rolled-up copies of SIGIS (theXaositects newsrag of choice).Other resident of the town

spent their time reciting, inunison, Harmonium FactolHashkars assertion that oneshould not throw all of oneseggs into a single basket. Ourculler on the scene, BleakerFactotum Eblis, witnessed boththe storm and the reaction ofthe Chaosmen but his versiondid not appear in SIGISbecause of emotional troubleshe experienced due to thestorm. As he put it, I couldntstop laughing.

Obituaries

IN AN

(jw)

all-too-common movethese days, three separate Revol-utionary League groups haveclaimed responsibility for yes-terdays Signer poisonings. Onestatement leaked to SIGIScullers read Unless all mem-bers of all Sigils factions im-mediately renounce their beliefsand leave the corrupt organis-ations then the poisonings willcontinue. The Harmonium

investigators are not pursuingthe claims seriously.Mover Tens told cullers:

The Anarchists jump on anybandwagon that can these days.Its like they havent got anyideas of their own any more. Idlike to see the sodding revol-utionaries try and outwit theHarmonium in a fair fight!Tens later apologised for his

comments, as he did not realisethey were on the record.

Anarchists Claim Responsibility

asy ountyFACTOL TERRANCE the Athar

3,000 jinx

necklace

Shattered Temple

additional 3,000

delivery

living or lost

Tagram the Defiant

Sign of the Drunken Mage Alehouse Row

No advances

of

has authorised the payment of to any blood

who can return a stolen from

the last night.

An will be awarded

upon the of the cross-trader,

, who scragged the necklace.Any cutters willing to take the job should contact

Factotum at the

on for details.

Payment will be on delivery only. .(rm)

WE, THE CIRCLE of Bluegem, take full credit for the explosion that occurred at thecourthouse past week. Our purpose is to expose the cruel and tyrannical reign of theFraternity of Order and hamper the futile efforts of those snivelling lawgivers to imposeunfair regulations upon our beloved city.

We hope, with utmost sincerity, that this incident sends a strong message to theGuvners that their rule is both loathsome and unnecessary.

The explosion at the courthouse should be taken as a warning that our patriotic effortswill not cease until the Guvners relinquish their stranglehold on our city.

Signed,Ares BluegemAres Bluegem

SIGIL'S 1 N D E P E N D E N . E G L e B A L I N F e R I I I A . E I @ N S E R V I C E Editorial

Five planewalkers in Auto- then open he would, modrons they'll have trodden on more mata on business witnessed or no. We just kept looking at toes than a morris-dancing 4 the fust sims of the March the modrins. I -mess abiut nalfeshnee. And then th; 9 and were &ling to share it ten thousand marched past in fiends'll have 'em for break- 1 with SIGIS. Here's how they the end. I t took about five fast, plain as the Spire. I'll be tell it, and what they think of hours, so it was evening in the mighty surprised if they let this amazingturn of events: end. This whole thiig bugs ordinary folks get on withlife.

CL,+J- IRU~J~~L~PE, me, really. The modrons are I'm going to stick with 'em WNE ~ J E , W E ~ ~ O F ~ U ~ P E going to make a heck of a and protect people's rights.

"We were in this council mess." For a fee, perhaps." office, when this guard who f4-7i~Ld ~ K W , &F~+c Z - E ~ ~ I ~ N O ~ , was there said to his com- m0.4 7c K ad- Dc PKCNE EZF mander 'Look sir. modrons!'. "I'mfrom Maclellan territorv. "I'm iust nlad that these arr- and we all looked, and these so the rnodrons ought to be ~~an;~lan~rs--not all planars things like little balls on legs steering clcar of our patch. All arc arrogant, I know-my were appearing. They just the sane, I fair jumped out of friends for example-but kept on coming, and they my skin when they showed those ones who think that marched off down the street. We went outside to have a look. No-one stopped us, because they were all too puzzled."

K,+7?f Gfka'k. ~ V W P O K A ~ W N W i

"The modrons just kept coming. At first, we thought it was a patrol. But when we'd seen about two hundred, we

up. Me and my mates here (Rath, Clairvan, Jens and Anfail) are off to Fortitude next to see what happens. Mind you, if their route is as addled as their timing, they'll no be going there by any road."

Jwt Mtw, fi-7.W "I suppose the modrons have as much right to KO where

living out here on the edge of thought is smart, they've all bcen taken by surprise for a change. It'll do the Outer Planes good to be made to

f understand the unusual and the unexpected for a change. I only hope that the modrons stick to the Outer Planes-- I'm interested in Elemental Fie, and it'll do neither them

all went to the pub to see what they want as anyoneelse. But nor folks l i e me any good at hauuenednext. Evervone was I VCN much doubt thrv'll see all if thev no messina with the 1 Y in; stew and but it that way. By the t i k e they basicstu~foftheun&erse." the pub owncr said that if he get to where I come from, in said he was going to open, Earendiis patch in Ysgard,

(ad

~ E Z ' G & P ' ~ ; L ~ , rdrmwp,

.WE,~TOF WE E 4 ~ 7 - "Well obviously this strange turn of events is rather unusual for the Modrons, but extremely reliable sources indicate that the current chaos being caused by the foul tanar'ri in the lower planes and elsewhere has finally pushed the modrons, always a logical, lawful race, into direct action to eliminate these putrid beings once and for all. Word has it that the modrons will be bypassing Baator

very lucky. So it's down to everyone who believes in goodness to make sure the modrons get past thc Upper Planes safely and without doing any damage. Some of my best agents just left for a long mission to the prime, so I'm short-staffed as well. I'd like to take this opportunity to make an informal appeal for help in defending key places along t l e route." (ar)

%VEY T~??T;cLI, OF TZ/C f c c ~ OF OPE

"Ooooh. I rrot a cramp this

afraid I have to conclude that this apparent anomaly is part of a larger pattern the mod- rons have been following for millennia; most likely they march an extra three-quarter cycle every 10,000 years or some such. Doomsday's a long way off, cutters, but I'll be pavingthe way for it."

4-IRflLd ~EA?KL 7% yU.'#iuw TMNY

"Walk tlle plank, I said. That's what I says to get a bcer. A million kegs of beer started walkinn back and forth back

completely,. you k;;ow-our morning. I was afraid some- and foGh swaying like the sea. legions are already marshal- thing like this would happen. Arrr, I said. Thar be beer. ling to travel alongside the It always does.. ." Then they went away. I a modrons in order to end the Blood War once and for all- you can assure your readers that with the tanar'ri gone, we will be ready to bring order and efficiency to the rest of the planes ..." (ka)

CCMLOP W E G ~ M ~ J W "I don't know why the modrons are marching so soon. PIl bet a green to a torus

~CE~KA.FA~I ;F~NACU- IR~ ordered me crew to fire at OF 7?fE TOOKG~M~ \dl." (11

"While I'd love to share my LOPNC~, ~ ~ I / - ? ' ~ L E , ~ u F ~ . ; R , factors opinion that it rep- ZJYE-IR-?~W~U.'HXEK resents some sort of leap "The March? Early? What's forward in the entropic next, gods back home? destiny of the multiverse, I'm Seriously, I haven't been on afraid I have to disagree. We the Great Ring long (I prefer know that all systems lose the Inners), this sounds like more energy than they take in; something is definitely un- it's an inevitable law. But the usual. Wonder why none of d4

that tiends are behind it encrgy loss involved in the your other powers have though. The modrons will cycles of the Modron March stopped it? Oh, well, rruess a probably go through the has up to now been so small that's what you get f o r b r - Upper Planes first, and that'll that our researchers have only shipping beings instcad of leave them weakened and ripe been able to detect it when elements." - (cjr) for an attack unless we're all they believed they could. I'm

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