The.man.From.earth.2007.1080p.x264.YIFY

7/26/2019 The.man.From.earth.2007.1080p.x264.YIFY

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200:00:43,475 --> 00:00:45,739Hey, buddy.

300:00:45,778 --> 00:00:47,769You don't waste time, do you?

400:00:47,846 --> 00:00:49,473I try not to.

500:00:49,548 --> 00:00:50,845Well, you need help?

600:00:50,883 --> 00:00:51,941Sure.

700:00:55,687 --> 00:00:57,746Would you like to tell us

800:00:57,790 --> 00:00:59,781what the hell that was all about?

900:00:59,858 --> 00:01:01,086I don't like good-byes.

1000:01:01,126 --> 00:01:03,924Kind of the point ofa good-bye party, John.

1100:01:03,996 --> 00:01:06,487Went to a certain amountof trouble, you know?

1200:01:06,532 --> 00:01:09,000

Could've at least stayeda few minutes, huh?

1300:01:09,034 --> 00:01:12,936Eaten some of the foodwe so feverishly prepared?

1400:01:13,005 --> 00:01:14,495I apologize, Harry.

15

00:01:14,606 --> 00:01:16,096But why are you moving so quickly?



1600:01:16,208 --> 00:01:18,267You only resigned a couple of days ago.

1700:01:18,310 --> 00:01:20,369You got the history chair at Stanford.

1800:01:20,412 --> 00:01:21,436I wish.

1900:01:21,513 --> 00:01:23,640Well, taquitos, chicken wings,

2000:01:23,715 --> 00:01:25,546Roastie-Toasties and beer.

2100:01:25,617 --> 00:01:27,346If we'd had more time,

2200:01:27,419 --> 00:01:29,444we'd have done somethinga little more grandiose.

2300:01:29,521 --> 00:01:31,216Candlelight dinner at McDonald's.

2400:01:31,256 --> 00:01:32,746Strippers.

2500:01:32,825 --> 00:01:34,622Taquitos are fine.

2600:01:34,660 --> 00:01:36,525A'right.

2700:01:36,628 --> 00:01:38,323Art's gonna be along, too.

2800:01:38,430 --> 00:01:40,159He's, uh, talking to a student. Pfft.

2900:01:40,232 --> 00:01:42,029Is George taking over for you?

3000:01:42,134 --> 00:01:44,762- George or Trimbell.



- Has the dean made up his mind?

3100:01:44,837 --> 00:01:45,861He hasn't called.

32

00:01:45,938 --> 00:01:46,870My god!

3300:01:46,939 --> 00:01:48,338Wh-What is this?

3400:01:48,373 --> 00:01:49,635It looks like a Van Gogh,

35

00:01:49,675 --> 00:01:51,108But I've never seen it before.

3600:01:51,143 --> 00:01:52,542Is that an original, John?

3700:01:52,578 --> 00:01:54,876No, it's just a gift someone gave me.

3800:01:54,947 --> 00:01:56,881

Still, it's a superb copy.

3900:01:56,949 --> 00:01:58,849Contemporaneous, I think,

4000:01:58,884 --> 00:02:00,784May I take a closer look?

4100:02:00,853 --> 00:02:01,820Please, yeah.

4200:02:04,089 --> 00:02:06,649Yeah, it's the samestretcher as Van Gogh used.

4300:02:06,692 --> 00:02:09,252Yeah, there's writingon the back in French.

44

00:02:09,294 --> 00:02:11,694Oh, "to my friend Jacques Borne."



4500:02:11,730 --> 00:02:12,890Wonder who that was?

4600:02:12,998 --> 00:02:14,397Someone he knew, I guess.

4700:02:14,500 --> 00:02:16,092Brilliant deduction, Sherlock.

4800:02:16,168 --> 00:02:19,069Surely you'll have thislooked at, appraised?

4900:02:19,104 --> 00:02:21,038

Well, maybe sometime,

5000:02:21,106 --> 00:02:24,337but I wouldn't really want money for it.

5100:02:25,844 --> 00:02:28,005That does it.

5200:02:28,113 --> 00:02:29,910Put that stuff in the kitchen.

5300:02:29,948 --> 00:02:33,440No, I'm gonna put itin the bathroom, John.

5400:02:33,519 --> 00:02:35,714Gas is off, electricity's on.

5500:02:37,422 --> 00:02:38,912Get comfortable while you can.

5600:02:39,024 --> 00:02:41,492The furniture's going this afternoon.

5700:02:41,527 --> 00:02:43,995It's been years since I sat on a floor.

5800:02:44,029 --> 00:02:45,929Heh. I can't remember her name.

5900:02:45,964 --> 00:02:47,556



Eh, it's good for the back.

6000:02:47,633 --> 00:02:49,464Can we do yoga exercises?

61

00:02:49,535 --> 00:02:51,332Tantric yoga, we can.

6200:02:52,738 --> 00:02:55,298So you're leavinggood old "we teach you."

6300:02:55,340 --> 00:02:58,366Rather suddenly, you must admit.

6400:02:58,443 --> 00:03:00,035Truth time, John.

6500:03:00,078 --> 00:03:01,636Is there a problem?

6600:03:01,680 --> 00:03:02,977No.

67

00:03:03,081 --> 00:03:05,208Oh, come on, you know we wanna help.

6800:03:05,284 --> 00:03:07,411That's appreciated, but really-

6900:03:07,486 --> 00:03:09,454There's no problem.

7000:03:09,488 --> 00:03:11,046Well, now I am curious.

7100:03:11,089 --> 00:03:12,351Where are you going?

7200:03:12,391 --> 00:03:13,585Givin' up tenure...

7300:03:13,692 --> 00:03:15,592

A decade of professorship,

74



00:03:15,694 --> 00:03:18,026in line to chain the department,

7500:03:18,096 --> 00:03:20,929and you don't know where you're going?

7600:03:20,999 --> 00:03:22,398Call it cabin fever.

7700:03:22,434 --> 00:03:24,925After a while, I get itchy feet.

7800:03:25,003 --> 00:03:26,197I've done this before.

7900:03:26,305 --> 00:03:29,331No, no, no, you're too youngto have done this before.

8000:03:29,408 --> 00:03:31,638And he hasn't aged a day in ten years.

8100:03:31,710 --> 00:03:33,143Every woman on the faculty

8200:03:33,212 --> 00:03:35,737would give anything to have that secret.

8300:03:35,814 --> 00:03:37,372Is that what they're after, Edith?

8400:03:37,416 --> 00:03:39,043Oh, stop, Harry.

8500:03:41,853 --> 00:03:43,445Wow, can you pull this?

8600:03:45,224 --> 00:03:46,452What the hell?

8700:03:46,525 --> 00:03:47,787What do you hunt?

88

00:03:47,826 --> 00:03:49,020Deer, mostly.



8900:03:49,061 --> 00:03:50,221Around big bear.

9000:03:50,262 --> 00:03:51,627With a bow and arrow?

9100:03:51,663 --> 00:03:53,358Most people can't bag a deer

9200:03:53,432 --> 00:03:55,423with a rifle and a telescopic sight.

9300:03:55,467 --> 00:03:57,025Though, good eatin'.

9400:03:57,069 --> 00:03:58,559The best wild game.

9500:03:58,637 --> 00:04:00,195Lives naturally, eats naturally.

9600:04:00,239 --> 00:04:01,706Well, it's beautiful.

9700:04:04,876 --> 00:04:06,571Art.

9800:04:08,280 --> 00:04:09,872Ah.

9900:04:09,915 --> 00:04:13,180So, can I get an "a" for awesome?

10000:04:13,218 --> 00:04:14,207Oh, my gosh.

10100:04:15,520 --> 00:04:16,987That was fun.

10200:04:17,022 --> 00:04:18,421Hey, John.

103

00:04:18,490 --> 00:04:20,924You know Linda.You had her last semester.



10400:04:20,993 --> 00:04:22,290Hi. Hey.

10500:04:22,327 --> 00:04:24,227

She's one of my victims now.I'm taking her home.

10600:04:24,296 --> 00:04:26,127She wanted to come byand say hello good-bye.

10700:04:26,198 --> 00:04:27,597Is Art as tough as I hear?

10800:04:27,633 --> 00:04:28,998Oh, archaeology's tough.

10900:04:29,034 --> 00:04:31,025Dr. Jenkins is a fine teacher.

11000:04:31,103 --> 00:04:33,037Oh, that's very politic.

111

00:04:33,105 --> 00:04:34,595It's very true. Uh-huh.

11200:04:34,640 --> 00:04:37,108Something for you toread on the road, pal.

11300:04:37,142 --> 00:04:40,043"Shadows of the cave:parallels to early man."

11400:04:40,112 --> 00:04:41,477M. Jenkins.

11500:04:41,513 --> 00:04:42,673Publish or perish.

11600:04:42,714 --> 00:04:43,806I'd rather read

11700:04:43,849 --> 00:04:44,941than write another one.



11800:04:45,017 --> 00:04:46,848Thank you.

11900:04:46,918 --> 00:04:48,112

Hi.

12000:04:48,220 --> 00:04:50,415Oh, everybody, this is Linda.

12100:04:50,455 --> 00:04:52,685Linda, this is everybody.

12200:04:52,724 --> 00:04:54,248

Linda. Hi.

12300:04:54,326 --> 00:04:56,521So.

12400:04:56,561 --> 00:04:59,052Where you going, John,like we give a damn?

12500:04:59,131 --> 00:05:00,257

We've already covered that.

12600:05:00,332 --> 00:05:02,664John's got itchy feet.

12700:05:02,701 --> 00:05:04,999There are over-the-counterremedies for that, John.

12800:05:07,973 --> 00:05:09,270So there is a problem.

12900:05:09,308 --> 00:05:11,071No.

13000:05:11,109 --> 00:05:13,407I just like to move on now and then.

13100:05:13,478 --> 00:05:14,775

It's a personal thing.

132



00:05:16,281 --> 00:05:18,272Well, not to pry.

13300:05:25,824 --> 00:05:28,691I'm sorry I don'thave more to offer you.

13400:05:28,727 --> 00:05:31,252Got conversation, someseats for your behinds,

13500:05:31,296 --> 00:05:32,320And, uh...

13600:05:36,101 --> 00:05:38,592

Is he ducking out on us again?

13700:05:40,038 --> 00:05:41,699...I do have this.

13800:05:41,740 --> 00:05:46,336Oh ho ho! Johnny Walker green!

13900:05:46,411 --> 00:05:49,175Didn't even

know they made it in green.

14000:05:49,214 --> 00:05:50,613What do they pay you?

14100:05:50,716 --> 00:05:52,616Nothing is too good for my friends.

14200:05:52,651 --> 00:05:55,620But I'm sorry-we are down to plastic cups now.

14300:05:55,654 --> 00:05:57,622That's a sacrilege I'll tolerate.

14400:05:57,656 --> 00:05:59,283I will do the honors.

14500:05:59,324 --> 00:06:00,951

Oh, come to papa.

146



00:06:02,494 --> 00:06:03,984Ooh! Here, cups, cups.

14700:06:04,062 --> 00:06:05,051There we go.

14800:06:05,097 --> 00:06:06,189Step on in here.

14900:06:06,264 --> 00:06:07,253There ya go...

15000:06:07,299 --> 00:06:09,767One for the birthday boy- Excuse me. Art?

15100:06:09,801 --> 00:06:10,859No, not for me.

15200:06:10,969 --> 00:06:12,266Oh, no, I don't drink.

15300:06:12,371 --> 00:06:14,362We're notgonna card you, darling.

15400:06:14,406 --> 00:06:16,397All right, here, jointhe circle at least.

15500:06:16,475 --> 00:06:21,105Well, to long life and good fortune

15600:06:21,179 --> 00:06:22,669To our esteemed friend

15700:06:22,714 --> 00:06:24,614and colleague, John Oldman.

15800:06:24,683 --> 00:06:26,548May he find undeserved bliss

15900:06:26,585 --> 00:06:27,779wherever he goes.

16000:06:27,819 --> 00:06:28,786



Hear, hear.

16100:06:28,820 --> 00:06:30,685Skol. Na zdorovye.

162

00:06:30,722 --> 00:06:32,587One off the top, John.

16300:06:37,696 --> 00:06:39,425Mm! Oh, that's good.

16400:06:39,498 --> 00:06:40,624Excuse me.

165

00:06:42,834 --> 00:06:46,235John, we're all sorry to see you go.

16600:06:46,304 --> 00:06:47,328Truly.

16700:06:49,841 --> 00:06:51,900Okay. Now we're done with that,

16800:06:52,010 --> 00:06:53,978

what do we do for therest of the afternoon?

16900:06:54,012 --> 00:06:55,775Anyone got a good topic?

17000:06:55,814 --> 00:06:57,577Like this, maybe? Heh.

17100:06:57,616 --> 00:06:58,605What is that?

17200:06:58,650 --> 00:07:01,312It's a burin off a parrot beak.

17300:07:01,353 --> 00:07:03,150Inclined chisel point...

17400:07:03,188 --> 00:07:05,213

Probably early Magdalenian.

175



00:07:05,257 --> 00:07:07,248May I see that?Sure.

17600:07:13,365 --> 00:07:15,094Yes indeed, that's what it is.

17700:07:16,368 --> 00:07:17,494What's a burin?

17800:07:17,569 --> 00:07:19,161A burin is a flint tool

17900:07:19,271 --> 00:07:21,796for grooving wood and

bone, antlers especially,

18000:07:21,873 --> 00:07:24,307to make spear and harpoon points.

18100:07:24,376 --> 00:07:26,367Magdalenians weren'tnoted for flint work,

18200:07:26,411 --> 00:07:28,140

so this is a very nice specimen.

18300:07:28,180 --> 00:07:30,648Okay, what's a Magdalenian?

18400:07:30,682 --> 00:07:32,081A later Cro-Magnon,

18500:07:32,117 --> 00:07:33,379without gettin' technical.

18600:07:33,485 --> 00:07:36,579It's the final cultureof the upper Paleolithic.

18700:07:36,621 --> 00:07:38,384If stones could speak, eh, Art?

18800:07:38,423 --> 00:07:40,118

So where'd you get that, John?

189



00:07:40,192 --> 00:07:42,717Believe it or not, from a thrift shop.A quarter.

19000:07:42,794 --> 00:07:44,284You lucky dog!

19100:07:44,396 --> 00:07:46,626I gotta go diggingfor this kind of stuff.

19200:07:46,698 --> 00:07:47,824Can I, uh?

19300:07:47,899 --> 00:07:48,888

Yeah.

19400:07:52,304 --> 00:07:53,430Huh.

19500:07:58,510 --> 00:08:00,137Maybe...

19600:08:00,212 --> 00:08:01,679I'm glad you did this.

19700:08:01,746 --> 00:08:04,544Did what? You mean come over?

19800:08:04,583 --> 00:08:06,244Maybe?

19900:08:06,351 --> 00:08:07,579Definitely.

20000:08:07,652 --> 00:08:08,949Gee, thanks.

20100:08:08,987 --> 00:08:10,284Well, so are we.

20200:08:10,355 --> 00:08:11,686So are we.

20300:08:11,756 --> 00:08:13,883We couldn't let you just run off.



20400:08:13,959 --> 00:08:15,085Thanks.

20500:08:17,162 --> 00:08:18,857

John, what is up, huh?

20600:08:18,964 --> 00:08:20,431Are you on America's most wanted?

20700:08:20,465 --> 00:08:21,557We won't turn you in.

20800:08:21,666 --> 00:08:22,997

Yeah, come on, out with it.

20900:08:23,068 --> 00:08:24,000You're among friends.

21000:08:24,069 --> 00:08:25,263Snoopy friends.

21100:08:25,303 --> 00:08:26,270Forget it.

21200:08:26,371 --> 00:08:27,963You are creating the mystery here.

21300:08:28,006 --> 00:08:30,304Obviously, you have somethingyou'd like to say. Say it!

21400:08:31,977 --> 00:08:33,569Well, maybe I...

21500:08:34,713 --> 00:08:35,941Ten, nine, eight, seven...

21600:08:35,981 --> 00:08:37,005Harry, stop.

21700:08:38,517 --> 00:08:41,384There is something I'm

tempted to tell you, I think.

218



00:08:41,419 --> 00:08:45,014I've never done this before,and I wonder how it'll pan out.

21900:08:48,193 --> 00:08:50,491I wonder if I could ask

you a silly question.

22000:08:50,529 --> 00:08:51,496John, we're teachers.

22100:08:51,530 --> 00:08:53,464We answer silly questions all the time.

22200:08:53,498 --> 00:08:54,522

Hey!

22300:08:54,599 --> 00:08:58,262What if a man from the upper Paleolithic

22400:08:58,303 --> 00:09:00,100survived until the present day?

22500:09:00,138 --> 00:09:01,833What do you mean, survived?

22600:09:01,873 --> 00:09:03,135Never died?

22700:09:03,208 --> 00:09:05,267Yes. What would he be like?

22800:09:05,343 --> 00:09:06,776Well, I know some guys.

22900:09:06,845 --> 00:09:08,642You ever been to the Ozarks?

23000:09:08,680 --> 00:09:10,443It's an interesting idea.

23100:09:10,482 --> 00:09:12,973What, are you working ona science fiction story?

23200:09:13,051 --> 00:09:15,246



Say I am. What would he be like?

23300:09:15,287 --> 00:09:16,549Pretty tired.

234

00:09:18,456 --> 00:09:20,185Well, seriously,

23500:09:20,258 --> 00:09:22,419As Art's book title suggests,

23600:09:22,460 --> 00:09:24,587he might be like any of us.

237

00:09:24,663 --> 00:09:25,857Dan. A caveman?

23800:09:25,964 --> 00:09:27,727Well, there's no anatomical difference

23900:09:27,766 --> 00:09:29,495between, say, a Cro-Magnon and us.

24000:09:29,568 --> 00:09:31,968

Except that as a rule,we've grown taller.

24100:09:32,003 --> 00:09:34,301What's the selectiveadvantage of height?

24200:09:34,372 --> 00:09:37,102Better to see predatorsin tall grass, my dear.

24300:09:37,175 --> 00:09:39,370Actually, tall and skinny

24400:09:39,477 --> 00:09:42,310radiates heat moreeffectively in warmer climates.

24500:09:42,380 --> 00:09:43,574And as for Neanderthals,

24600:09:43,682 --> 00:09:45,343



I mean, we've all seen apish people.

24700:09:45,383 --> 00:09:46,577That strain's still with us.

248

00:09:46,618 --> 00:09:48,711But he'd be a caveman.

24900:09:48,787 --> 00:09:49,719No, he wouldn't.

25000:09:49,788 --> 00:09:50,777John's hypothetical man

251

00:09:50,822 --> 00:09:52,585would have livedthrough 140 centuries...

25200:09:52,624 --> 00:09:53,989Yeah, roughly.

25300:09:54,025 --> 00:09:56,391...and changed with every one of them.

254

00:09:56,428 --> 00:09:58,726I mean, assuming normal intelligence.

25500:09:58,797 --> 00:10:01,265Well, we think men ofthe upper Paleolithic

25600:10:01,299 --> 00:10:03,130were as intelligent as we are.

25700:10:03,201 --> 00:10:04,896They just didn't know as much.

25800:10:05,003 --> 00:10:07,938John's man would havelearned as the race learned.

25900:10:08,006 --> 00:10:11,100In fact, if he had an inquiring mind,

26000:10:11,142 --> 00:10:14,202his knowledge might be astonishing.



26100:10:14,245 --> 00:10:16,509If you do write that,let me have a look at it.

262

00:10:16,548 --> 00:10:18,743I'm sure you'll make someanthropological boners.

26300:10:18,817 --> 00:10:19,841It's a deal.

26400:10:19,918 --> 00:10:21,749What would keep him alive?

26500:10:21,820 --> 00:10:23,617What does the biologist say?

26600:10:23,655 --> 00:10:25,247Cigarettes.

26700:10:25,323 --> 00:10:27,120And ice cream.

268

00:10:27,158 --> 00:10:29,217All right, all right, I'll play.

26900:10:29,327 --> 00:10:32,990All right, um, in science fiction terms,

27000:10:33,031 --> 00:10:34,658I would say...

27100:10:36,234 --> 00:10:40,000Perfect regenerationof the body's cells,

27200:10:40,038 --> 00:10:42,131especially in the vital organs.

27300:10:42,173 --> 00:10:44,038Actually, the humanbody appears designed

27400:10:44,075 --> 00:10:46,134to live about 190 years.



27500:10:46,177 --> 00:10:50,011Most of us just die of slow poisoning.

27600:10:50,048 --> 00:10:51,538

Maybe he did something right,

27700:10:51,583 --> 00:10:54,882something everybody elsein history had done wrong.

27800:10:54,953 --> 00:10:56,284What, like eat the food,

279

00:10:56,354 --> 00:10:58,345drink the water, and breathe the air?

28000:10:58,390 --> 00:11:00,324Prior to modern times,

28100:11:00,358 --> 00:11:02,189those were pristine.

28200:11:02,227 --> 00:11:06,687

We've extended our lifespanin a world that's, uh...

28300:11:06,731 --> 00:11:08,596not fit to live in.

28400:11:08,633 --> 00:11:10,100You know, it could happen.

28500:11:10,135 --> 00:11:12,433The pancreas turns overcells every 24 hours,

28600:11:12,504 --> 00:11:14,062the stomach lining in three days,

28700:11:14,105 --> 00:11:15,663the entire body in seven years,

288

00:11:15,707 --> 00:11:17,197but the process falters.



28900:11:17,308 --> 00:11:20,072Waste accumulates, eventuallyproves fatal to function.

29000:11:20,111 --> 00:11:22,739

Now if a quirk in his immune system

29100:11:22,814 --> 00:11:24,509led to perfect detox,

29200:11:24,549 --> 00:11:26,517perfect renewal, then yeah.

29300:11:26,551 --> 00:11:28,746

He could duck decay.

29400:11:28,820 --> 00:11:31,050Mm, that's a secretwe'd all love to have.

29500:11:31,122 --> 00:11:34,023Would you really want to do that?

29600:11:34,059 --> 00:11:35,924

Live 14,000 years?

29700:11:36,027 --> 00:11:38,757Well, if I could stayhealthy and I didn't age,

29800:11:38,830 --> 00:11:39,922I mean, why not?

29900:11:40,031 --> 00:11:42,158Yeah. What a chance to learn.

30000:11:42,233 --> 00:11:45,031Is anyone hungry?

30100:11:45,070 --> 00:11:47,937You know, the more I thinkabout it, yeah, it's possible.

302

00:11:47,972 --> 00:11:49,530Anything is possible, right?



30300:11:49,574 --> 00:11:52,839After all, one century's magic,another century's science.

30400:11:52,877 --> 00:11:55,004

They thought Columbuswas a nut job, right?

30500:11:55,046 --> 00:11:56,070Pasteur, Copernicus?

30600:11:56,147 --> 00:11:57,774Aristarchus long before that.

307

00:11:57,849 --> 00:11:58,873Right.

30800:11:58,950 --> 00:12:01,180I had a chance to sail with Columbus,

30900:12:01,219 --> 00:12:03,585Only I'm not the adventurous type.

31000:12:03,621 --> 00:12:06,556

I was pretty sure the Earth was round,

31100:12:06,591 --> 00:12:09,321but at that point, I still thought

31200:12:09,394 --> 00:12:12,090he might fall off an edge someplace...

31300:12:22,040 --> 00:12:24,406Look around, John.

31400:12:24,442 --> 00:12:25,807We just did.

31500:12:25,844 --> 00:12:28,210I suppose there's ajoke in there somewhere,

31600:12:28,246 --> 00:12:29,508

but I don't get it.

317



00:12:29,547 --> 00:12:31,412There's nothing to get.

31800:12:31,449 --> 00:12:33,212What are we talking about?

31900:12:33,318 --> 00:12:35,183We were just talking about a caveman

32000:12:35,220 --> 00:12:37,586who survives until the present time.

32100:12:37,622 --> 00:12:39,954As you said, what a chance to learn,

32200:12:40,024 --> 00:12:41,423once I learned to learn.

32300:12:43,628 --> 00:12:45,619Did you start the whiskeybefore we got here?

32400:12:47,665 --> 00:12:50,600Pretend it's science fiction.

32500:12:50,635 --> 00:12:52,364Figure it out.

32600:12:52,437 --> 00:12:56,931Okay, a-- Very old Cro-Magnon

32700:12:56,975 --> 00:12:58,533living until the present.

32800:13:01,079 --> 00:13:02,011Oh!

32900:13:06,284 --> 00:13:08,275What?

33000:13:08,386 --> 00:13:11,253John just confided thathe's 14,000 years old.

33100:13:11,289 --> 00:13:14,884



Oh, John, you don't look a day over 900.

33200:13:14,926 --> 00:13:16,120Okay, okay.

333

00:13:16,194 --> 00:13:17,923All right, Spock, I'llplay your little game.

33400:13:17,996 --> 00:13:20,624What do you want? What's the punch line?

33500:13:20,698 --> 00:13:23,326Every ten years or so, when people start

33600:13:23,401 --> 00:13:25,096to notice I don't age, I move on.

33700:13:27,705 --> 00:13:30,105That's very good,that's very quick, John.

33800:13:30,141 --> 00:13:32,541I wanna read thatstory when you're done.

33900:13:32,610 --> 00:13:34,043You want more?

34000:13:34,112 --> 00:13:35,977By all means. This is great.

34100:13:36,014 --> 00:13:37,003All right, now...

34200:13:38,116 --> 00:13:40,710So you think that you are a...

34300:13:40,752 --> 00:13:41,810A, uh, Cro-Magnon.

34400:13:41,853 --> 00:13:43,411Well, I didn't learn it in school.

34500:13:43,454 --> 00:13:45,115That's my best guess,



34600:13:45,223 --> 00:13:49,660based on archaeological data,maps, anthropological research.

347

00:13:49,727 --> 00:13:51,024Since Mesopotamia,

34800:13:51,129 --> 00:13:54,257I've got the last...4,000 years straight.

34900:13:54,332 --> 00:13:57,426You're ahead of mostpeople, so please, go on.

35000:13:57,468 --> 00:13:59,026Well, you know the background stuff,

35100:13:59,070 --> 00:14:00,469so I'll make it brief.

35200:14:00,538 --> 00:14:02,938In what I call my first lifetime,

35300:14:02,974 --> 00:14:04,669I aged to about 35...

35400:14:04,709 --> 00:14:06,301what you see.

35500:14:06,377 --> 00:14:08,504I ended up leading my group.

35600:14:08,580 --> 00:14:10,377They saw me as magical.

35700:14:10,415 --> 00:14:13,407I didn't even have to fight for it.

35800:14:13,484 --> 00:14:16,351Then fear came, and they chased me away.

359

00:14:16,387 --> 00:14:17,877They thought that I was



36000:14:17,922 --> 00:14:20,254stealing their lives away to stay young.

36100:14:20,291 --> 00:14:22,589The prehistoric origin

of the vampire myth.

36200:14:22,627 --> 00:14:23,525That is good!

36300:14:23,595 --> 00:14:24,584First thousand years,

36400:14:24,696 --> 00:14:26,721

I didn't know up from sideways.

36500:14:26,798 --> 00:14:29,232How do you know thefirst thousand years?

36600:14:29,300 --> 00:14:30,790An informed guess, based on what

36700:14:30,835 --> 00:14:32,302

I've learned in my memories.

36800:14:32,337 --> 00:14:34,396Most people can scarcelyremember their childhood,

36900:14:34,439 --> 00:14:36,498but you have memories of that time?

37000:14:36,541 --> 00:14:38,099Like yours, selective.

37100:14:38,142 --> 00:14:41,509You know, the high points,the low points, traumas.

37200:14:41,546 --> 00:14:43,241They stick in the mind forever.

373

00:14:43,314 --> 00:14:47,216Put down at 3 or 35,you still feel a twinge.



37400:14:49,721 --> 00:14:51,018Go on.

37500:14:51,055 --> 00:14:54,081

I kept getting chasedbecause I wouldn't die,

37600:14:54,125 --> 00:14:57,526so I got the hang ofjoining new groups I found.

37700:14:57,562 --> 00:15:00,929I also got the idea ofperiodically moving on.

37800:15:01,966 --> 00:15:03,456We were semi-nomadic, of course,

37900:15:03,568 --> 00:15:06,503following the weatherand the game we hunted.

38000:15:06,571 --> 00:15:08,471The first 2,000 years were cold.

38100:15:08,573 --> 00:15:11,133We learned it was warmerat lower elevations.

38200:15:11,175 --> 00:15:13,769Late glacial period, I assume.

38300:15:13,811 --> 00:15:16,371What was the terrain like?

38400:15:16,414 --> 00:15:19,508Mountainous.

38500:15:19,584 --> 00:15:21,484Vast plains to the west.

38600:15:22,687 --> 00:15:25,588West - something you learned in school.

38700:15:25,623 --> 00:15:28,183



Towards the setting sun.

38800:15:28,293 --> 00:15:30,591I suspect I saw the British isles

389

00:15:30,628 --> 00:15:32,926from what is now the French coast.

39000:15:32,997 --> 00:15:34,589Huge mountains...

39100:15:34,632 --> 00:15:37,362on the other side ofan enormous deep valley

39200:15:37,402 --> 00:15:39,302that was shadowed by the setting sun.

39300:15:39,337 --> 00:15:41,202This is before they were separated

39400:15:41,239 --> 00:15:43,833from the continent by risingseas, as glaciers melted.

39500:15:45,009 --> 00:15:46,442That happened?

39600:15:46,511 --> 00:15:48,638Yes, the end of the Pleistocene.

39700:15:48,713 --> 00:15:50,704So far, what he says fits.

39800:15:50,748 --> 00:15:52,773Oh, yeah, into any textbook.

39900:15:52,817 --> 00:15:54,751And that's where I found it.

40000:15:54,819 --> 00:15:56,684How can I have knowledgeable recall

401

00:15:56,721 --> 00:15:58,552if I didn't have knowledge?



40200:15:58,623 --> 00:16:00,557It's all retrospective.

40300:16:00,625 --> 00:16:03,025All I can do is

integrate my recollections

40400:16:03,061 --> 00:16:04,790with modern findings.

40500:16:04,862 --> 00:16:07,524Caveman, you gonna hit meover the head with a club

406

00:16:07,565 --> 00:16:09,192and drag me into the bedroom?

40700:16:09,267 --> 00:16:10,859You'd be more fun conscious.

40800:16:10,902 --> 00:16:11,800Oh, John.

40900:16:11,869 --> 00:16:13,097

Let me get this straight.

41000:16:13,171 --> 00:16:15,002We're not talking about reincarnation.

41100:16:15,073 --> 00:16:16,870You're not saying that you remember

41200:16:16,908 --> 00:16:18,307whatever the hell it would be,

41300:16:18,376 --> 00:16:19,673200 separate lifetimes, dying

41400:16:19,711 --> 00:16:22,111and being born again and yada yada?

41500:16:22,180 --> 00:16:23,613One lifetime.

41600:16:24,782 --> 00:16:26,147



Some lifetime.

41700:16:26,184 --> 00:16:27,481Wow.

418

00:16:27,518 --> 00:16:29,986Maybe there is somethingto this reincarnation thing.

41900:16:30,021 --> 00:16:31,283You're supposed to come back

42000:16:31,322 --> 00:16:32,914again and again, learn and learn,

42100:16:32,991 --> 00:16:34,515and somehow, John, you just managed

42200:16:34,592 --> 00:16:36,082to bypass all the other bodies.

42300:16:36,127 --> 00:16:38,391Well, what's the point?

424

00:16:41,432 --> 00:16:43,229What about oceans?

42500:16:43,301 --> 00:16:45,599Didn't see them till much later.

42600:16:45,636 --> 00:16:47,968So how would you knowan ocean from a lake?

42700:16:48,006 --> 00:16:49,803Big waves - something else.

42800:16:49,841 --> 00:16:52,036I can only surmise in retrospect.

42900:16:52,110 --> 00:16:54,101Were you curious aboutwhere it all came from?

43000:16:55,613 --> 00:16:57,774We would look up at the sky and wonder.



43100:16:57,815 --> 00:16:59,976"There's gotta besome big guys up there.

432

00:17:00,018 --> 00:17:01,679What else made all this down here?"

43300:17:01,753 --> 00:17:03,243At first I thought

43400:17:03,287 --> 00:17:05,881there was something wrong with me -

435

00:17:05,957 --> 00:17:08,482maybe I was a bad guy for not dying.

43600:17:09,660 --> 00:17:12,891Then I began to wonder if I was cursed

43700:17:12,964 --> 00:17:15,159or perhaps blessed.

43800:17:15,266 --> 00:17:18,895

Then I thought maybe I had a mission.

43900:17:18,970 --> 00:17:20,665Do you still think you do?

44000:17:20,705 --> 00:17:22,434God works in mysterious ways.

44100:17:22,473 --> 00:17:25,806I think I just happened.

44200:17:33,584 --> 00:17:34,676Wow.

44300:17:34,719 --> 00:17:35,777Hello?

44400:17:36,821 --> 00:17:38,686Yes, Ellie?

44500:17:38,723 --> 00:17:40,554



What's wrong?

44600:17:40,591 --> 00:17:41,683Sandy?

447

00:17:41,726 --> 00:17:42,818Coming.

44800:17:45,730 --> 00:17:47,061Yeah?

44900:17:47,131 --> 00:17:48,826Do we have Ellie's midterm here?

450

00:17:51,302 --> 00:17:52,291Yeah, sorry.

45100:17:52,403 --> 00:17:54,837I picked it up with the periodicals.

45200:17:54,906 --> 00:17:56,134Got it.

45300:17:56,207 --> 00:17:57,902

No, you're worried about your parents?

45400:17:57,942 --> 00:17:59,341Don't- Don't worry.

45500:17:59,410 --> 00:18:00,707You passed, C+.

45600:18:00,745 --> 00:18:03,077Take care of yourself.

45700:18:03,147 --> 00:18:04,478Good kid.

45800:18:04,549 --> 00:18:06,380What does pre-med need with history?

45900:18:06,451 --> 00:18:07,748Got it.

46000:18:07,785 --> 00:18:09,082



Thank you.

46100:18:11,355 --> 00:18:12,515Sorry, guys.

462

00:18:12,590 --> 00:18:14,251John, please continue.

46300:18:14,358 --> 00:18:16,553Come on, I thought wewere done with that.

46400:18:16,594 --> 00:18:18,186No! Let's go on with it.

46500:18:18,262 --> 00:18:19,559It's interesting.

46600:18:19,664 --> 00:18:22,462Besides, I think he's makinga certain amount of sense.

46700:18:22,500 --> 00:18:25,060Like Hegel.Logic from absurd premises.

46800:18:25,103 --> 00:18:26,400That Van Gogh?

46900:18:26,471 --> 00:18:28,598He gave it to me.

47000:18:28,673 --> 00:18:31,369I was, uh, Jacques Bourne at the time,

47100:18:31,409 --> 00:18:32,603A pig farmer.

47200:18:32,677 --> 00:18:33,974A pig farmer?

47300:18:35,279 --> 00:18:37,304I like to work with my hands.

47400:18:37,381 --> 00:18:39,474He would come out to the place, paint.



47500:18:39,517 --> 00:18:41,576We talked about capturing nature in art.

47600:18:41,619 --> 00:18:43,746

Turner, Cezanne, Pissarro.

47700:18:43,788 --> 00:18:45,722Oh, the Nolde landscapes.

47800:18:45,790 --> 00:18:47,587Not in Van Gogh's time.

47900:18:47,692 --> 00:18:49,182

He would have loved them, though.

48000:18:49,227 --> 00:18:50,194Yes.

48100:18:50,294 --> 00:18:51,921Well, I don't understand

48200:18:51,996 --> 00:18:54,157why you can't remember

where you're from.

48300:18:54,198 --> 00:18:55,961Geography hasn't changed.

48400:18:56,000 --> 00:18:57,627I learned that in-

48500:18:57,702 --> 00:18:58,999professor Hensen's tepid lectures.

48600:18:59,036 --> 00:19:00,401But you're right.

48700:19:00,505 --> 00:19:02,530Where did you live whenyou were five years old?

48800:19:02,573 --> 00:19:03,631

Little Rock.

489



00:19:03,674 --> 00:19:05,665Your mother, she took you to the market?

49000:19:05,743 --> 00:19:07,040Mm-Hmm. What direction was it?

49100:19:07,078 --> 00:19:08,443From your house.

49200:19:08,479 --> 00:19:09,844I don't know.

49300:19:09,881 --> 00:19:10,779How far?

49400:19:10,848 --> 00:19:12,679Um, three blocks.

49500:19:12,750 --> 00:19:14,240Were there any references

49600:19:14,285 --> 00:19:15,684that stuck in your mind?

497

00:19:15,753 --> 00:19:17,220Well, there was a gas station

49800:19:17,255 --> 00:19:18,779and a big field.

49900:19:18,856 --> 00:19:20,983I was told I could never go there alone.

50000:19:21,058 --> 00:19:22,650And if you went back there today,

50100:19:22,693 --> 00:19:24,160Would it be the same?

50200:19:24,195 --> 00:19:27,062No. I'm sure it's alldifferent and built up.

503

00:19:27,098 --> 00:19:29,931Thus the saying"You can't go home again"



50400:19:29,967 --> 00:19:31,229Because it isn't there anymore.

50500:19:31,269 --> 00:19:32,998

Picture it on my scale-

50600:19:33,070 --> 00:19:36,369I migrated through an endless flat space

50700:19:36,407 --> 00:19:38,773full of endless new things.

50800:19:38,809 --> 00:19:43,678

Forests, mountains, tundra, canyons.

50900:19:43,714 --> 00:19:47,241My memory sees what I saw then.

51000:19:47,285 --> 00:19:50,584My eye sees freeways, urban sprawl,

51100:19:50,621 --> 00:19:53,818Big Macs under the Eiffel tower.

51200:19:53,891 --> 00:19:56,587Early on, the worldgot bigger and bigger,

51300:19:56,627 --> 00:19:58,891and then...

51400:19:58,996 --> 00:20:00,725Think what I've had to unlearn.

51500:20:00,798 --> 00:20:02,595And now you're moving on.

51600:20:02,700 --> 00:20:05,362As you've said, there'stalk of my not aging,

51700:20:05,403 --> 00:20:08,133

And when that happens, I move on.

518



00:20:08,206 --> 00:20:11,733Well, it might make senseto set up your next identity,

51900:20:11,809 --> 00:20:15,074Your next ten years, and

then just drop into it.

52000:20:15,112 --> 00:20:16,841I've done that a few times,

52100:20:16,914 --> 00:20:18,711even passed as my own son.

52200:20:18,749 --> 00:20:20,512

"Oh, you're an engineer, too?

52300:20:20,551 --> 00:20:23,019You're Ben's son. He was a good man."

52400:20:23,120 --> 00:20:25,714Saves trouble withcredentials and references.

52500:20:25,756 --> 00:20:28,384

On the other hand, I'vebeen busted a few times.

52600:20:28,426 --> 00:20:31,452Spent a year in jail, Belgium, 1862

52700:20:31,529 --> 00:20:33,121- I won't forget that -

52800:20:33,164 --> 00:20:35,155for faking a government application.

52900:20:35,233 --> 00:20:37,030When'd you come to America?

53000:20:37,134 --> 00:20:39,2271890, right after Van Gogh's death,

53100:20:39,270 --> 00:20:41,295

With some French immigrants...

532



00:20:41,339 --> 00:20:42,863Moving on.

53300:20:45,676 --> 00:20:48,736An answer for every question.

53400:20:48,779 --> 00:20:50,474Except one, John.

53500:20:50,548 --> 00:20:51,879Why're you doing this?

53600:20:54,452 --> 00:20:56,886A whim. Maybe not such a good idea.

53700:20:56,954 --> 00:20:58,444I...

53800:20:58,489 --> 00:21:01,515Wanted to say good-bye to you as me,

53900:21:01,592 --> 00:21:03,457not what you thought I was.

540

00:21:03,494 --> 00:21:05,325Well, since this isn't funny,

54100:21:05,396 --> 00:21:07,830we think you might have a problem.

54200:21:07,898 --> 00:21:09,627A very serious problem.

54300:21:10,935 --> 00:21:12,698I've got boxes to move.

54400:21:12,737 --> 00:21:14,500I'll give you a hand.

54500:21:15,706 --> 00:21:20,507Wouldn't you havesome relic, an artifact

546

00:21:20,544 --> 00:21:22,944to remind you of your early life?



54700:21:23,014 --> 00:21:24,447Like this, maybe?

54800:21:24,515 --> 00:21:25,846Thrift shop.

54900:21:25,916 --> 00:21:26,940Really.

55000:21:29,253 --> 00:21:31,619If you lived 100... 1,000 years...

55100:21:34,225 --> 00:21:35,624Would you still have this?

55200:21:35,660 --> 00:21:37,628What would cause you to keep it?

55300:21:37,662 --> 00:21:39,596As a memento to your beginnings,

55400:21:39,630 --> 00:21:41,120even if you didn't have

55500:21:41,165 --> 00:21:43,190the concept of beginnings?

55600:21:43,234 --> 00:21:45,225It would be gone, lost.

55700:21:46,370 --> 00:21:47,428No.

55800:21:47,471 --> 00:21:49,268I don't have artifacts.

55900:21:51,742 --> 00:21:53,141Keep that.

56000:21:55,279 --> 00:21:56,541Interesting.

561

00:21:58,149 --> 00:22:00,276You could have lied about that.



56200:22:00,351 --> 00:22:02,376Don't talk about me while I'm gone.

56300:22:10,394 --> 00:22:12,191Is he serious?

56400:22:12,229 --> 00:22:14,993If he is, I'm sorry to say he's...

56500:22:15,032 --> 00:22:17,933Oh, how could he haveconcealed that for ten years?

56600:22:18,002 --> 00:22:20,095

Least he doesn't appear to be dangerous.

56700:22:22,740 --> 00:22:23,900What are you doing?

56800:22:24,008 --> 00:22:25,976Checkin' for a hidden mic.

56900:22:26,010 --> 00:22:27,341Candid camera.

57000:22:29,213 --> 00:22:31,113He's fabricating these wild stories.

57100:22:31,148 --> 00:22:33,082I've never seen him acting like this.

57200:22:33,117 --> 00:22:35,210Oh, it's crazy.

57300:22:35,252 --> 00:22:38,710All right, all right,as soon as you can, then.

57400:22:45,262 --> 00:22:46,923I love you, you know.

57500:22:48,265 --> 00:22:49,732I know.

57600:22:51,535 --> 00:22:54,265



Since my first week at the office.

57700:22:58,342 --> 00:22:59,274And?

578

00:22:59,343 --> 00:23:02,574I care very much about you,

57900:23:02,680 --> 00:23:05,205but now you know whatyou'd be getting into.

58000:23:05,282 --> 00:23:07,147Do you really think you're a caveman?

58100:23:07,184 --> 00:23:08,708Do you?

58200:23:14,792 --> 00:23:15,986Could you love me,

58300:23:16,093 --> 00:23:18,493or don't you believe in that anymore?

584

00:23:19,897 --> 00:23:22,127I've gotten over it too many times.

58500:23:23,701 --> 00:23:25,191Fond of you...

58600:23:26,504 --> 00:23:28,836certainly attracted to you.

58700:23:31,242 --> 00:23:32,209That's it?

58800:23:36,313 --> 00:23:37,746I can work with that.

58900:23:40,951 --> 00:23:43,476If what I'm saying is true,

59000:23:43,521 --> 00:23:46,046

you and any children will age.

591



00:23:46,123 --> 00:23:47,317I won't.

59200:23:47,425 --> 00:23:49,325And one day I'll leave.

59300:23:49,360 --> 00:23:52,329You'll go back to yourMay-December romances.

59400:23:52,363 --> 00:23:53,455The simple fact is

59500:23:53,531 --> 00:23:55,522that I can't give you forever.

59600:23:57,535 --> 00:23:58,934How long's forever?

59700:24:00,971 --> 00:24:02,802Who ever really has it?

59800:24:06,477 --> 00:24:09,378My parents split up before I was born,

59900:24:09,413 --> 00:24:12,348And then my mom's next marriage lasted

60000:24:12,383 --> 00:24:13,816what, a whole three years?

60100:24:15,820 --> 00:24:18,721Then there's death,illness, acts of god...

60200:24:20,891 --> 00:24:22,916No one knows how long they have.

60300:24:24,695 --> 00:24:26,390Or how little.

60400:24:29,834 --> 00:24:31,199I love you.

60500:24:33,103 --> 00:24:34,695Take whatever you can get.



60600:24:37,741 --> 00:24:39,299Like ten years?

60700:24:45,316 --> 00:24:46,715

Ah! Ha ha ha!

60800:24:48,219 --> 00:24:49,151Uhn!

60900:24:49,220 --> 00:24:50,118Oh.

61000:24:50,154 --> 00:24:52,145

Why did you do that?

61100:24:52,223 --> 00:24:54,851I wanted to see how fast youwere. Check your reflexes.

61200:24:54,925 --> 00:24:57,018I don't have eyes inthe back of my head,

613

00:24:57,061 --> 00:24:58,824I can't hear a flea walking,

61400:24:58,863 --> 00:25:00,524I am not in any way superman.

61500:25:00,631 --> 00:25:02,963Well, I'm a second-degree black belt.

61600:25:03,000 --> 00:25:04,797Give it another thousand years.

61700:25:06,470 --> 00:25:08,461Well. I got it, I got it, I got it.

61800:25:10,074 --> 00:25:11,006Jesus.

61900:25:11,075 --> 00:25:12,940

Smooth demonstration, Harry.

620



00:25:12,977 --> 00:25:14,968Sit on it, Dan.

62100:25:16,180 --> 00:25:17,704I still have questions.

62200:25:17,781 --> 00:25:19,510l-I do too, John.

62300:25:19,583 --> 00:25:22,177I mean, are we done with prehistory yet?

62400:25:22,219 --> 00:25:25,086Remember any of your original language?

62500:25:25,122 --> 00:25:27,989A little. One thinghasn't changed much...

62600:25:31,695 --> 00:25:33,595Did you ever do any cave art?

62700:25:33,631 --> 00:25:35,656Do you know the rock art at Les Eyzies?

62800:25:35,699 --> 00:25:36,791Mm-Hmm.

62900:25:36,834 --> 00:25:39,200It was the work of a man named...

63000:25:40,738 --> 00:25:41,796Giraud.

63100:25:41,839 --> 00:25:43,466He did a pretty good job.

63200:25:43,507 --> 00:25:45,941He would draw the animals

63300:25:46,010 --> 00:25:48,308that we hoped to find to eat.

634

00:25:48,345 --> 00:25:50,404One day after a fruitless hunt,



63500:25:50,447 --> 00:25:52,574our chief stomped his teeth out

63600:25:52,616 --> 00:25:54,641because his magic had failed him.

63700:25:54,718 --> 00:25:57,744After that, someone hadto chew his food for him.

63800:25:57,821 --> 00:25:59,618Finally, he got- I suspect-

63900:25:59,657 --> 00:26:01,648

an infected jaw,

64000:26:01,692 --> 00:26:03,353and he was abandoned.

64100:26:03,394 --> 00:26:05,157That's awful.

64200:26:05,195 --> 00:26:06,992You have to know what to kill.

64300:26:07,064 --> 00:26:08,759Is this why all your students

64400:26:08,799 --> 00:26:11,165say your knowledge of history is...

64500:26:11,201 --> 00:26:12,190so amazing?

64600:26:12,269 --> 00:26:14,294No, that's mostly based on study.

64700:26:14,371 --> 00:26:18,637Remember, it's one man,one place at a time,

64800:26:18,676 --> 00:26:20,906My solitary viewpoint

64900:26:20,978 --> 00:26:23,674



of a world I knew almost nothing about.

65000:26:23,714 --> 00:26:24,874Well, let's talk about

651

00:26:24,982 --> 00:26:26,973what you say you do know about:

65200:26:27,017 --> 00:26:28,416Historical times.

65300:26:28,485 --> 00:26:29,816Don't encourage him.

654

00:26:29,887 --> 00:26:31,013Edith.

65500:26:31,088 --> 00:26:33,921Next few thousand years, it got warmer.

65600:26:33,991 --> 00:26:35,288A few thousand years-

65700:26:35,392 --> 00:26:37,860

See, now I know you're guessing.

65800:26:37,895 --> 00:26:40,363You can't get there from here, Art.

65900:26:40,397 --> 00:26:42,729Well then, pray, continue.

66000:26:43,834 --> 00:26:45,734We hunted reindeer, mammoths,

66100:26:45,803 --> 00:26:47,703bison, horses,

66200:26:47,738 --> 00:26:49,262The game retreated northward

66300:26:49,306 --> 00:26:50,432as the climate changed.

66400:26:50,507 --> 00:26:52,600



You got the idea of growing food

66500:26:52,643 --> 00:26:54,406rather than gathering it,

666

00:26:54,445 --> 00:26:56,572raising animals ratherthan hunting them.

66700:26:56,614 --> 00:26:58,206Am-Am I getting warm, here?

66800:26:58,248 --> 00:26:59,715I bet I am.

66900:26:59,750 --> 00:27:02,184Lakeside living becomes commonplace,

67000:27:02,252 --> 00:27:03,776- Fishing, fowling...- Come on!

67100:27:04,955 --> 00:27:07,082John, this is out of any textbook.

67200:27:07,157 --> 00:27:08,089Even yours.

67300:27:08,158 --> 00:27:10,956You got most of it right.

67400:27:11,061 --> 00:27:13,029Eventually I headed to the east.

67500:27:13,063 --> 00:27:15,224I'd grown curious about the world.

67600:27:15,265 --> 00:27:17,825I'd gotten the hang of going it alone,

67700:27:17,868 --> 00:27:20,428Learning how to fit in when I wanted to.

678

00:27:20,471 --> 00:27:22,268East.



67900:27:22,373 --> 00:27:24,170Towards the rising sun?

68000:27:24,274 --> 00:27:27,004Yes. I thought it might be warmer there.

68100:27:28,278 --> 00:27:31,179That's when I saw an ocean.

68200:27:32,683 --> 00:27:35,117The Mediterranean, probably.

68300:27:35,185 --> 00:27:37,517It was around the

beginning of the bronze age,

68400:27:37,588 --> 00:27:39,818So I followed the traderoutes from the east,

68500:27:39,890 --> 00:27:41,084Copper, tin,

68600:27:41,125 --> 00:27:44,219

Learning languages as I went.

68700:27:44,294 --> 00:27:47,320Everywhere, creation myths,

68800:27:47,398 --> 00:27:50,128new gods, so many, so different.

68900:27:50,200 --> 00:27:52,828I finally realized that it was...

69000:27:52,903 --> 00:27:55,394probably all hogwash,

69100:27:55,506 --> 00:27:57,997So I was Sumerian for 2,000 years,

69200:27:58,108 --> 00:28:00,372Then finally Babylonian under Hammurabi.

69300:28:00,411 --> 00:28:01,844



Great man.

69400:28:01,879 --> 00:28:04,370And I sailed as a Phoenician for a time.

695

00:28:04,448 --> 00:28:07,645See, moving on had beeneasier as a hunter-gatherer...

69600:28:09,286 --> 00:28:11,686Difficult when villages emerged,

69700:28:11,755 --> 00:28:15,191tougher still in city stateswhere authority was centralized.

69800:28:15,259 --> 00:28:16,954Strangers were suspect.

69900:28:17,061 --> 00:28:20,690It seemed as though Iwas always moving on.

70000:28:20,764 --> 00:28:22,664I learned some new tricks-

70100:28:22,700 --> 00:28:25,362even faked my death a couple of times.

70200:28:27,571 --> 00:28:29,664I continued east

70300:28:29,707 --> 00:28:31,470to India,

70400:28:31,508 --> 00:28:34,966luckily at the time of the Buddha.

70500:28:35,012 --> 00:28:36,172Luckily.

70600:28:38,916 --> 00:28:41,646Most extraordinary man I've ever known.

70700:28:41,685 --> 00:28:42,777He taught me things



70800:28:42,820 --> 00:28:45,152I'd never thought about before.

70900:28:45,189 --> 00:28:47,487

You studied... with the Buddha?

71000:28:47,524 --> 00:28:48,991Until he died.

71100:28:50,294 --> 00:28:53,229He knew there was somethingdifferent about me.

712

00:28:53,297 --> 00:28:55,663I never told him.

71300:28:55,699 --> 00:28:58,031This is fascinating.

71400:28:58,102 --> 00:29:00,332I almost wish it were true.

71500:29:00,404 --> 00:29:04,067

Yeah, if it was true,why are you telling us?

71600:29:04,141 --> 00:29:05,768I mean, we might leave here today,

71700:29:05,843 --> 00:29:07,367Go out there, tell everybody.

71800:29:07,444 --> 00:29:08,934It would vanish in disbelief.

71900:29:10,147 --> 00:29:12,581A story that goes around the room.

72000:29:12,649 --> 00:29:14,640No credibility.

72100:29:14,685 --> 00:29:17,779

Even if I could make you believe me,

722



00:29:17,855 --> 00:29:19,482in a month, you wouldn't.

72300:29:19,556 --> 00:29:22,047Some of you would call me a psychopath,

72400:29:22,092 --> 00:29:24,560Others would be angryat a pointless joke.

72500:29:24,595 --> 00:29:26,586Some of us are angry now.

72600:29:26,663 --> 00:29:28,563This-this was a bad idea.

72700:29:28,599 --> 00:29:31,329Uh, I love you all, and I do not want

72800:29:31,368 --> 00:29:32,699to put you through anything.

72900:29:32,770 --> 00:29:33,964Then why are you doing it?

73000:29:34,071 --> 00:29:36,335'Cause I wantedto say good-bye-

73100:29:36,373 --> 00:29:37,271As yourself.

73200:29:37,374 --> 00:29:38,864I think you've done that,

73300:29:38,909 --> 00:29:39,967whoever that self is.

73400:29:40,010 --> 00:29:41,170Easy, Edith.

73500:29:41,278 --> 00:29:42,870We're just grading his homework.

73600:29:42,913 --> 00:29:45,711I see what's going on. You're



playing the good cop, Dan.

73700:29:45,783 --> 00:29:47,011That's fine. Just enjoy it.

738

00:29:47,084 --> 00:29:49,712All right, I think thiswhole thing is just a crock!

73900:29:49,787 --> 00:29:51,482I should leave, but I'm gonna stay.

74000:29:51,522 --> 00:29:54,218You know why? 'Cause I wannasee what this is all about.

74100:29:54,291 --> 00:29:55,724So do I. What is this all about?

74200:29:55,793 --> 00:29:57,886Let's ask Dr. Freud,who's just arrived.

74300:29:57,928 --> 00:29:59,293Hey, Will! Will!

74400:30:01,298 --> 00:30:02,230Art. Hey.

74500:30:03,534 --> 00:30:04,592John!

74600:30:04,635 --> 00:30:06,102I'm glad I caught you.

74700:30:06,136 --> 00:30:08,036Someone mentionedthat you were leaving-

74800:30:08,105 --> 00:30:09,936Called you, told you that I've lost it.

74900:30:10,007 --> 00:30:12,737Glad you're here. Things are

going in unexpected directions.

750



00:30:12,810 --> 00:30:14,038Yes, so I hear.

75100:30:14,111 --> 00:30:15,305Hi.

75200:30:15,345 --> 00:30:16,903Are you hungry?

75300:30:16,947 --> 00:30:18,437Uh, thank you, no.

75400:30:18,515 --> 00:30:20,676Whiskey? Johnny Walker green.

75500:30:20,717 --> 00:30:22,708Oh, yes.

75600:30:26,123 --> 00:30:28,683You look very familiar,my dear. Linda Murphy.

75700:30:28,725 --> 00:30:31,285I'm in your Tuesdaypsych 1 class, Dr. Gruber.

75800:30:31,328 --> 00:30:33,853Ah, well, this lesson may be something

75900:30:33,931 --> 00:30:36,923I could not have imagined.

76000:30:36,967 --> 00:30:41,267I regret being soobvious about this, John,

76100:30:41,338 --> 00:30:44,603but these people are allvery concerned for you.

76200:30:44,641 --> 00:30:47,235Yes, I'm cutting out paper dinosaurs.

76300:30:47,277 --> 00:30:50,440

I really wish I'd beenhere from the beginning.



76400:30:50,480 --> 00:30:51,447Me too.

76500:30:51,548 --> 00:30:53,482Let me just say something right now.

76600:30:53,550 --> 00:30:55,882There's absolutely noway in the whole world

76700:30:55,953 --> 00:30:58,649for John to prove this story to us,

76800:30:58,689 --> 00:31:01,590

just like there's no wayfor us to disprove it.

76900:31:01,625 --> 00:31:03,786No matter how outrageous we think it is,

77000:31:03,827 --> 00:31:07,092no matter how highly trainedsome of us think we are,

771

00:31:07,130 --> 00:31:09,291there's absolutelyno way to disprove it.

77200:31:09,333 --> 00:31:13,793Our friend is either acaveman, a liar, or a nut.

77300:31:13,837 --> 00:31:15,304So while we're thinking about that,

77400:31:15,339 --> 00:31:17,967why don't we just go with it?

77500:31:18,008 --> 00:31:19,407I mean, hell, who knows,

77600:31:19,509 --> 00:31:21,477he might jolt us into believing him,

77700:31:21,511 --> 00:31:23,502or we might jolt him back to reality.



77800:31:23,547 --> 00:31:26,015Believing? Whose reality?

77900:31:26,049 --> 00:31:28,517

So... you're a caveman.

78000:31:28,552 --> 00:31:29,814Yes. Uh...

78100:31:29,853 --> 00:31:33,254Uh, I was a Cro-Magnon, I think.

78200:31:33,323 --> 00:31:36,087

You don't know ifyou're a caveman or not?

78300:31:36,126 --> 00:31:37,388No, I'm sure about that.

78400:31:37,427 --> 00:31:38,519A Cro-Magnon, then.

78500:31:38,562 --> 00:31:40,621

When did you first realize this?

78600:31:40,731 --> 00:31:42,858When the Cro-Magnonwas first identified,

78700:31:42,933 --> 00:31:44,992when anthropology gave them a name,

78800:31:45,035 --> 00:31:46,468I had mine.

78900:31:46,536 --> 00:31:47,935Well, please continue.

79000:31:47,971 --> 00:31:49,871I'm sure you must have more to say.

79100:31:49,940 --> 00:31:51,840

Would you like me to lie on the couch?

792



00:31:51,875 --> 00:31:54,435As you wish.

79300:31:56,346 --> 00:31:58,871As a physician, I'm curious.

79400:31:58,949 --> 00:32:02,214In this enormous lifetime you describe,

79500:32:02,286 --> 00:32:04,049have you ever been ill?

79600:32:04,087 --> 00:32:05,884Sure, as much as anyone.

79700:32:05,923 --> 00:32:07,447Seriously ill?

79800:32:07,491 --> 00:32:08,924Sometimes.

79900:32:08,992 --> 00:32:10,892Of what? Do you know?

800

00:32:10,994 --> 00:32:12,518In prehistory, I can't tell you.

80100:32:12,596 --> 00:32:14,086Maybe pneumonia once or twice.

80200:32:16,133 --> 00:32:17,998Last few hundred years,

80300:32:18,035 --> 00:32:21,198I've gotten over typhoid, yellow fever,

80400:32:21,238 --> 00:32:24,366smallpox... I survived the black plague.

80500:32:24,408 --> 00:32:25,636Bubonic?

80600:32:25,709 --> 00:32:27,040

Oh, that's terrible.

807



00:32:27,110 --> 00:32:28,805More so than history describes.

80800:32:28,845 --> 00:32:32,372And smallpox.- But you're not scarred.

80900:32:32,416 --> 00:32:33,542I don't scar.

81000:32:33,617 --> 00:32:34,982No, John, that is not possible.

81100:32:35,018 --> 00:32:36,315Please, let's take John's story

81200:32:36,353 --> 00:32:39,447at face value and exploreit from that perspective.

81300:32:39,523 --> 00:32:42,583If he doesn't scar, it'sno stranger than the rest.

81400:32:42,626 --> 00:32:45,060

John, would you please stop by my lab,

81500:32:45,128 --> 00:32:46,857suffer a few tests from

81600:32:46,930 --> 00:32:48,761your friendly neighborhood biologist.

81700:32:48,832 --> 00:32:50,060I'm leery of labs.

81800:32:50,133 --> 00:32:52,431Afraid I might go in andstay for a thousand years

81900:32:52,469 --> 00:32:54,767while cigarette smokingmen try to figure me out.

820

00:32:54,838 --> 00:32:56,635You don't think that I would betray you?



83500:33:18,195 --> 00:33:19,719who we've known and trusted, Edith.

83600:33:19,796 --> 00:33:22,492Here you sit.

You can't break his story.

83700:33:22,532 --> 00:33:25,194All you can do is thumb your nose at it.

83800:33:25,235 --> 00:33:27,226Is that what you're doing, John?

83900:33:27,304 --> 00:33:28,896

Are you laughing at us inside?

84000:33:28,939 --> 00:33:30,497I wish you didn't feel that way.

84100:33:30,607 --> 00:33:33,940What you're saying -it offends common sense.

84200:33:34,011 --> 00:33:35,740

So does relativity, quantum mechanics-

84300:33:35,812 --> 00:33:37,404That's the way nature works.

84400:33:37,514 --> 00:33:41,848But your story doesn't fitinto nature as we know it.

84500:33:41,918 --> 00:33:43,613But we know so little, Dan.

84600:33:44,721 --> 00:33:45,915We know so little.

84700:33:45,956 --> 00:33:47,116How many of you know

84800:33:47,157 --> 00:33:48,419

five geniuses in your field

849



00:33:48,458 --> 00:33:49,652that you disagree with...

85000:33:49,726 --> 00:33:51,318One you would like to strangle?

85100:33:51,361 --> 00:33:53,454Strangle them all.

85200:33:53,530 --> 00:33:55,157It's bad enough we have to listen

85300:33:55,232 --> 00:33:56,426to Harry's idiotic jokes.

85400:33:56,466 --> 00:33:57,626Thank you very much, Edith.

85500:33:57,667 --> 00:34:00,067Maybe when I'm 110, I'llbe as smart as you are.

85600:34:00,137 --> 00:34:01,468If you lived as long as John did,

85700:34:01,505 --> 00:34:03,132you still wouldn't grow up.

85800:34:03,173 --> 00:34:04,765Come on, guys. Take it easy.

85900:34:04,808 --> 00:34:07,276How often do we get to meet someone

86000:34:07,310 --> 00:34:10,711who says he's a stone age man?

86100:34:10,781 --> 00:34:12,009Well, once is enough.

86200:34:12,082 --> 00:34:13,379Edith.

863

00:34:13,483 --> 00:34:15,542All right. A guy with your mind-



86400:34:15,585 --> 00:34:17,576you'd have studied a great deal.

86500:34:17,654 --> 00:34:21,090I have ten degrees,

including all of yours...

86600:34:21,124 --> 00:34:23,490Except yours, Will.

86700:34:23,527 --> 00:34:25,688That makes me feel a trifle Lilliputian.

86800:34:25,729 --> 00:34:28,027

That's over the span of 170 years.

86900:34:28,098 --> 00:34:31,329I got my biology degreeat Oxford in 1840,

87000:34:31,401 --> 00:34:33,062So I'm a little behind the times.

87100:34:33,103 --> 00:34:34,331

The same in other areas-

87200:34:34,404 --> 00:34:37,168I can't keep up with thenew stuff that comes along.

87300:34:37,207 --> 00:34:38,105No one can.

87400:34:38,175 --> 00:34:39,472Not even in their specialty.

87500:34:39,509 --> 00:34:40,999So much for the myth

87600:34:41,111 --> 00:34:42,806of the super-wise,all-knowing immortal.

877

00:34:42,846 --> 00:34:44,677I see your point, John.



87800:34:44,748 --> 00:34:46,340No matter how long a man lives,

87900:34:46,416 --> 00:34:48,509he can't be in advance of his times.

88000:34:48,552 --> 00:34:51,544He can't know more thanthe best of the race knows,

88100:34:51,621 --> 00:34:54,556if that- I mean, when theworld learned it was round,

882

00:34:54,624 --> 00:34:55,886you learned it.

88300:34:55,926 --> 00:34:57,257It took some time.

88400:34:57,327 --> 00:34:58,521News traveled slowly

88500:34:58,628 --> 00:35:00,493

before communications were fancy.

88600:35:00,530 --> 00:35:03,055There were social obstacles,

88700:35:03,100 --> 00:35:06,297preconceptions, screams from the church.

88800:35:06,369 --> 00:35:07,461Ten doctorates.

88900:35:07,504 --> 00:35:09,369That's impressive,John. Did you teach them?

89000:35:09,406 --> 00:35:10,703Some.

89100:35:10,774 --> 00:35:13,368

You might have all done the same.

892



00:35:13,410 --> 00:35:16,538Living 14,000 yearsdidn't make me a genius.

89300:35:16,580 --> 00:35:17,877I just had time.

89400:35:17,914 --> 00:35:19,472Time.

89500:35:19,583 --> 00:35:21,483We can't see it, we can't hear it,

89600:35:21,585 --> 00:35:25,248we can't weigh it, we can't

measure it in a laboratory.

89700:35:25,288 --> 00:35:27,483It's a subjective sense of becoming

89800:35:27,591 --> 00:35:32,028what we are instead of whatwe were a nanosecond ago,

89900:35:32,095 --> 00:35:34,461

becoming what we willbe in another nanosecond.

90000:35:34,498 --> 00:35:36,489The Hopis see time as a landscape,

90100:35:36,533 --> 00:35:38,967existing before and behind us,

90200:35:39,002 --> 00:35:41,436and we move...we move through it,

90300:35:41,505 --> 00:35:43,200slice by slice.

90400:35:43,306 --> 00:35:44,500Clocks measure time.

905

00:35:44,608 --> 00:35:45,905No, they measure themselves.



90600:35:46,009 --> 00:35:48,307The objective referentof clock is another clock.

90700:35:48,411 --> 00:35:50,743

How very interesting. Whathas it got to do with John?

90800:35:50,814 --> 00:35:52,805Oh, he- he might be a man

90900:35:52,849 --> 00:35:57,843who lives outside of time as we know it.

910

00:36:00,423 --> 00:36:02,789Yes, uh, well.

91100:36:02,859 --> 00:36:05,953People do go around armed these days.

91200:36:05,996 --> 00:36:09,090If I shot you, John...You're immortal?

913

00:36:09,132 --> 00:36:11,066Would you survive this?

91400:36:11,101 --> 00:36:13,865I never said I was immortal, just old.

91500:36:13,904 --> 00:36:15,064I might die.

91600:36:15,105 --> 00:36:16,470And then you could wonder

91700:36:16,573 --> 00:36:18,905the rest of your incarceratedlife what you shot.

91800:36:20,610 --> 00:36:23,374Well, uh, may I?

919

00:36:25,081 --> 00:36:26,673Preferable to a gun.



92000:36:26,716 --> 00:36:30,015Will, that was a bit much.

92100:36:30,086 --> 00:36:32,646Ooh. Books.

92200:36:32,689 --> 00:36:35,214Doctorates.

92300:36:35,292 --> 00:36:38,489Yes, you have grown and changed.

92400:36:38,528 --> 00:36:40,928But there is always innate nature.

92500:36:40,997 --> 00:36:43,329Wouldn't you be more comfortable

92600:36:43,400 --> 00:36:44,958squatting in the backyard?

92700:36:45,001 --> 00:36:46,468Sometimes I do, Will.

92800:36:46,503 --> 00:36:47,970Look up at the stars.

92900:36:48,004 --> 00:36:48,993Wonder.

93000:36:49,039 --> 00:36:51,439And what did primitive man make of them?

93100:36:51,508 --> 00:36:53,339A great mystery.

93200:36:53,410 --> 00:36:55,810There were gods up there then.

93300:36:55,845 --> 00:36:58,336Shamans who knew about them told us.

934

00:36:58,415 --> 00:36:59,609They still do.



93500:37:01,151 --> 00:37:03,051Have you ever wished it would end?

93600:37:05,655 --> 00:37:06,587No.

93700:37:06,656 --> 00:37:08,988Fourteen thousand years.

93800:37:09,059 --> 00:37:11,687Injuries, illness, disasters.

93900:37:11,761 --> 00:37:14,059You've survived them all.

94000:37:14,097 --> 00:37:16,395You're a very lucky man.

94100:37:21,705 --> 00:37:22,967Come in.

94200:37:25,909 --> 00:37:27,001John Oldman?

94300:37:27,077 --> 00:37:28,374Yes.

94400:37:28,411 --> 00:37:30,311Charity now. We're hereto pick up the furniture.

94500:37:30,380 --> 00:37:32,075It's all yours.

94600:37:32,182 --> 00:37:33,376Here, take this chair.

94700:37:33,416 --> 00:37:35,384I'm gonna go drink in the corner.

94800:37:37,387 --> 00:37:39,947You're, uh... you're donating it?

94900:37:39,990 --> 00:37:41,184Everything?



95000:37:41,224 --> 00:37:42,316I'll get more.

95100:37:42,392 --> 00:37:43,916

Do you always travel this light?

95200:37:43,994 --> 00:37:46,087It's the only way to move.

95300:37:47,731 --> 00:37:49,596Oh, you-

95400:37:49,699 --> 00:37:51,189

You've talked a good deal

95500:37:51,234 --> 00:37:54,465about your extraordinaryamount of living.

95600:37:54,504 --> 00:37:56,665What do you think of dying, John?

95700:37:56,706 --> 00:37:58,298

Do you fear death?

95800:37:58,341 --> 00:37:59,603Who wouldn't?

95900:37:59,643 --> 00:38:01,702How did primitive man regard death?

96000:38:01,745 --> 00:38:03,838Well, we had the practical concept.

96100:38:03,880 --> 00:38:05,814You know, we stopped,

96200:38:05,849 --> 00:38:07,680fell down, didn't get up,

96300:38:07,751 --> 00:38:09,946Started to smell bad, come apart.

96400:38:09,986 --> 00:38:12,079



Injuries we could understand.

96500:38:12,155 --> 00:38:14,680If someone's insideswere all over the ground.

96600:38:14,758 --> 00:38:16,055Infections...

96700:38:16,092 --> 00:38:20,552They were, uh, mysterious.

96800:38:21,698 --> 00:38:23,097Aging...

96900:38:23,166 --> 00:38:24,656The biggest mystery of all.

97000:38:24,701 --> 00:38:26,692You realized you were different.

97100:38:26,770 --> 00:38:29,796Longer to realize how I was different,

972

00:38:29,873 --> 00:38:31,670to find a way to synthesize

97300:38:31,708 --> 00:38:34,199my experience into a view of myself.

97400:38:34,277 --> 00:38:36,711At first, I thought everybody had

97500:38:36,780 --> 00:38:38,475something wrong with them.

97600:38:38,581 --> 00:38:42,142They got old and theydied, animals, too...

97700:38:42,185 --> 00:38:43,174but not me.

978

00:38:46,189 --> 00:38:49,022Oh, forgive me, my dear.



97900:38:49,092 --> 00:38:50,684You live simply.

98000:38:50,727 --> 00:38:53,218I've owned castles, but why leave a lot

98100:38:53,296 --> 00:38:54,524if you're always leaving?

98200:38:54,597 --> 00:38:55,723I have money.

98300:38:55,799 --> 00:38:58,529What, you get into

AT&T at 50 cents, John?

98400:39:00,737 --> 00:39:02,364As one grows older,

98500:39:02,439 --> 00:39:07,775the days, weeks, monthsgo by more quickly.

98600:39:07,844 --> 00:39:10,870

What does a day or a year

98700:39:10,947 --> 00:39:13,472or a century mean to you?

98800:39:13,550 --> 00:39:16,075The birth-death cycle?

98900:39:16,152 --> 00:39:17,710Turbulence.

99000:39:17,754 --> 00:39:19,278I meet someone,

99100:39:19,356 --> 00:39:22,189learn their name, saya word, they're gone.

99200:39:22,258 --> 00:39:26,661

Others come like waves. Rise, fall.

993



00:39:28,198 --> 00:39:30,598Ripples in a wheatfield, blown by the wind.

99400:39:30,667 --> 00:39:33,329Do you ever get tired of it all?

99500:39:33,370 --> 00:39:34,769I get bored now and then.

99600:39:34,804 --> 00:39:38,069They keep making the samestupid mistakes over and over.

99700:39:38,108 --> 00:39:39,006

They.

99800:39:40,076 --> 00:39:41,270Then you see yourself

99900:39:41,378 --> 00:39:43,573as separate from the rest of humanity.

100000:39:44,614 --> 00:39:46,377I didn't mean it that way.

100100:39:47,684 --> 00:39:48,810But of course...

100200:39:49,986 --> 00:39:50,975I am.

100300:39:52,389 --> 00:39:55,187Are you comfortableknowing that you have lived

100400:39:55,291 --> 00:39:59,125while everyone you knew- Everyone you knew, John! -

100500:39:59,195 --> 00:40:00,287has died?

100600:40:00,330 --> 00:40:02,093

I've regretted losing people...

1007



00:40:02,132 --> 00:40:03,099often.

100800:40:03,199 --> 00:40:05,565Have you ever felt guilt about that,

100900:40:05,602 --> 00:40:07,832something akin to survivor's guilt?

101000:40:07,904 --> 00:40:10,099In the strict psychological sense?

101100:40:10,140 --> 00:40:11,471I suppose I have.

101200:40:11,508 --> 00:40:12,600Yeah.

101300:40:14,110 --> 00:40:16,203But what can I do about it?

101400:40:18,214 --> 00:40:19,704Indeed.

1015

00:40:20,750 --> 00:40:22,012I'm sorry, ma'am.

101600:40:22,051 --> 00:40:23,211Gentlemen, I'm-

101700:40:23,253 --> 00:40:25,187I'm gonna keep the couch.

101800:40:25,221 --> 00:40:26,119Thanks.

101900:40:26,222 --> 00:40:28,315Ladies? Will? Oh, no...

102000:40:28,425 --> 00:40:31,019You've got a heart condition.Don't grump about it.

1021

00:40:31,060 --> 00:40:32,823Hey, how about changingthe subject, Will?



102200:40:32,862 --> 00:40:34,625Enough with the- with the dying.

102300:40:34,664 --> 00:40:38,361

But this is the flipside of his coin, Harry.

102400:40:38,435 --> 00:40:41,131I'm very curious to know his feelings.

102500:40:41,237 --> 00:40:44,104Would you prefer I askedhim about his father?

102600:40:44,140 --> 00:40:45,539I thought you always started with

102700:40:45,575 --> 00:40:46,872"Tell me about your mother."

102800:40:46,943 --> 00:40:49,969Yes, but prehistory wasstrongly patriarchal.

102900:40:50,046 --> 00:40:53,106Surely you remember your father.

103000:40:53,149 --> 00:40:56,175I seem to remember a figure,

103100:40:56,252 --> 00:40:59,187Perhaps an older brother,a social father, maybe.

103200:40:59,255 --> 00:41:00,847Well, no matter.

103300:41:00,890 --> 00:41:03,222I can scarcely remember mine.

103400:41:04,727 --> 00:41:07,218Do you feel a vacancy

103500:41:07,297 --> 00:41:09,288in your life about that, John,



103600:41:09,332 --> 00:41:11,323something you wish could be filled

103700:41:11,401 --> 00:41:14,234

by a face, a voice, an image?

103800:41:16,639 --> 00:41:18,106Not at this late date.

103900:41:18,141 --> 00:41:20,439There must besomeone - probably many-

1040

00:41:20,510 --> 00:41:22,171that you valued intensely.

104100:41:22,212 --> 00:41:23,543Loved.

104200:41:23,613 --> 00:41:27,105You saw them age and die -

104300:41:27,150 --> 00:41:30,551

a friend, a colleague, a wife.

104400:41:30,620 --> 00:41:33,919Certainly you've had wives and children?

104500:41:33,957 --> 00:41:35,322I'd move on.

104600:41:35,358 --> 00:41:37,121I had to move on.

104700:41:37,227 --> 00:41:39,855Making him history's biggest bigamist.

104800:41:41,030 --> 00:41:43,658Have you ever in your life thought

104900:41:43,733 --> 00:41:45,325"It should have been me"?

105000:41:47,570 --> 00:41:48,628



Maybe.

105100:41:48,671 --> 00:41:50,138Yeah, Art has told me

1052

00:41:50,173 --> 00:41:51,936that some of your early fellows

105300:41:51,975 --> 00:41:54,637feared you were stealing their lives.

105400:41:54,677 --> 00:41:57,339Have you thought that perhaps you were?

1055

00:41:57,380 --> 00:41:58,779Perhaps you are!

105600:41:58,848 --> 00:42:01,976There have always beenlegends of such a thing,

105700:42:02,018 --> 00:42:04,009a creature not quite human

1058

00:42:04,087 --> 00:42:08,148taking not the blood,but the life force itself?

105900:42:08,191 --> 00:42:09,419My God, Will.

106000:42:09,492 --> 00:42:11,892Unconsciously, perhaps,

106100:42:11,995 --> 00:42:15,954by some biological or psychic mechanism

106200:42:15,999 --> 00:42:17,933that we can only guess at.

106300:42:18,001 --> 00:42:20,993I'm not saying you would dosuch a thing deliberately.

106400:42:21,037 --> 00:42:24,063I'm not saying that you



would even know how to...

106500:42:24,107 --> 00:42:25,404Would you?

1066

00:42:26,943 --> 00:42:29,844But would such a thing be fair?

106700:42:29,913 --> 00:42:31,505So you believe me now?

106800:42:31,548 --> 00:42:34,847I'm only exploring what you have said.

1069

00:42:34,918 --> 00:42:38,820Whether I believe it ornot is of no importance.

107000:42:38,855 --> 00:42:40,618We will die.

107100:42:40,657 --> 00:42:42,352You will live.

1072

00:42:42,425 --> 00:42:44,552Will you come to my funeral, John?

107300:42:44,627 --> 00:42:45,821Hey, Will...

107400:42:45,862 --> 00:42:47,022You've gone too far.

107500:42:47,130 --> 00:42:49,758John didn't ask to be what he is.

107600:42:49,832 --> 00:42:52,426And we did not ask to hear about it.

107700:42:52,468 --> 00:42:53,935But if it were true,

107800:42:54,037 --> 00:42:57,063

is there one among uswho would not feel envy,



107900:42:57,140 --> 00:42:59,574even perhaps a touch of hatred?

108000:43:01,277 --> 00:43:03,211You told us of yourself, John.

108100:43:03,279 --> 00:43:05,179Can you imagine how we feel?

108200:43:05,214 --> 00:43:07,273I never thought of that.

108300:43:07,317 --> 00:43:09,308Since you may not die,

108400:43:09,385 --> 00:43:12,115while we most assuredly will...

108500:43:12,188 --> 00:43:14,349There must be a reason for that, no?

108600:43:14,390 --> 00:43:16,221Perhaps you are an expert.

108700:43:17,627 --> 00:43:20,152Uh, that's it, Mr. Oldman.Have a good one.

108800:43:20,196 --> 00:43:21,891Thank you. You too.

108900:43:25,702 --> 00:43:27,727Or are you a vampire, John?

109000:43:28,838 --> 00:43:30,499Even an unknowing one.

109100:43:31,608 --> 00:43:33,200Do you stand alive and tall

109200:43:33,309 --> 00:43:35,402in a graveyard that you helped to fill?

109300:43:35,445 --> 00:43:36,912That's going too far.



109400:43:36,946 --> 00:43:39,847Bored, perhaps lonely,because your heart

1095

00:43:39,916 --> 00:43:41,884cannot keep its treasures.

109600:43:41,918 --> 00:43:43,909Is that what you're doing?

109700:43:45,321 --> 00:43:47,312Have you led a wrongful life?

1098

00:43:48,424 --> 00:43:50,415Well, then, perhaps

109900:43:51,527 --> 00:43:53,324it is time to die.

110000:43:55,131 --> 00:43:56,325Wait a minute, now.

110100:43:56,366 --> 00:43:58,334

Look, I don't know what John is doing,

110200:43:58,368 --> 00:44:00,768But I sure as hell don'tlike what you're doing.

110300:44:00,837 --> 00:44:03,203Give me that gun or I'mgonna break your goddamn arm.

110400:44:03,272 --> 00:44:06,537You sound like our football coach, Dan.

110500:44:06,576 --> 00:44:08,510What do you think, John?

110600:44:08,578 --> 00:44:10,478A shot to the arm?

1107

00:44:10,513 --> 00:44:13,414Perhaps we could watch it heal.



110800:44:13,483 --> 00:44:15,576A bullet in the head...

110900:44:15,618 --> 00:44:17,711What exactly will happen?

111000:44:23,726 --> 00:44:25,887I have papers to correct.

111100:44:25,928 --> 00:44:28,624As much as I dislike that job,

111200:44:28,698 --> 00:44:31,394it'll be preferable to this.

111300:44:33,002 --> 00:44:35,027I leave you with it.

111400:44:37,407 --> 00:44:39,637Jesus Christ.

111500:44:39,709 --> 00:44:41,643What the hell was that all about?

111600:44:41,711 --> 00:44:42,905Where'd he get a gun?

111700:44:43,012 --> 00:44:44,536He had you on the ropes, John.

111800:44:44,614 --> 00:44:46,138Are you really so damn smart?

111900:44:46,215 --> 00:44:47,512It's not like Will.

112000:44:49,419 --> 00:44:51,216Mary passed away yesterday.

112100:44:53,723 --> 00:44:54,917Who?

1122

00:44:55,024 --> 00:44:57,424His wife.



112300:44:58,861 --> 00:45:00,624She had, uh, pancreatic cancer.

112400:45:02,465 --> 00:45:03,489Will!

112500:45:05,168 --> 00:45:06,795I didn't know about Mary.

112600:45:06,869 --> 00:45:10,270I'm sorry. I can see howthis might have hit you.

112700:45:10,306 --> 00:45:14,208

Please, permit me tobe infantile by myself.

112800:45:14,277 --> 00:45:16,575Will, please.

112900:45:33,196 --> 00:45:34,993What the hell were you thinking, Art?

113000:45:35,031 --> 00:45:36,828

Oh, come on. Something had to be done.

113100:45:36,899 --> 00:45:38,264I have to say I agree.

113200:45:38,301 --> 00:45:39,598And he's our friend.

113300:45:39,702 --> 00:45:41,897Whatever else on Earth is going on,

113400:45:41,938 --> 00:45:42,996He's our friend!

113500:45:43,039 --> 00:45:44,006You sure about that?

113600:45:44,107 --> 00:45:45,597Why are you being so hard on him?

113700:45:45,708 --> 00:45:48,370



One of my favoritepeople has disappeared.

113800:45:48,411 --> 00:45:51,744Can you get Alzheimer's at 35?

113900:45:51,814 --> 00:45:55,079Maybe I'm trying to wake him up.

114000:45:55,118 --> 00:45:58,713Maybe I'm too sad to cry.

114100:46:02,959 --> 00:46:05,928What I said about myself hurt him.

114200:46:05,962 --> 00:46:08,294He struck back expertly.

114300:46:08,364 --> 00:46:11,094That stuff about stealing life forces?

114400:46:11,167 --> 00:46:13,897I've always wondered about the reasons.

1145

00:46:20,276 --> 00:46:23,575Well, we still have anafternoon to kill, right?

114600:46:25,715 --> 00:46:27,478Charades?

114700:46:29,685 --> 00:46:31,880No. John?

114800:46:31,921 --> 00:46:34,583I have a charade, andit is just for you.

114900:46:34,624 --> 00:46:35,591Sandy, come here.

115000:46:35,691 --> 00:46:37,283Come on, come on, come on.

115100:46:37,326 --> 00:46:38,953Okay, this one's for you.



115200:46:38,995 --> 00:46:40,895Ready?

115300:46:51,941 --> 00:46:53,431

Ooh!

115400:46:53,509 --> 00:46:54,908Unh.

115500:46:55,011 --> 00:46:56,569My first wedding?

115600:46:56,612 --> 00:46:58,102

There you go.

115700:46:58,147 --> 00:46:59,614There you go!

115800:46:59,649 --> 00:47:02,277Very good, and I bet at least one of us

115900:47:02,351 --> 00:47:03,443is your direct descendent.

116000:47:03,486 --> 00:47:05,545And I didn't even send a Christmas card.

116100:47:05,588 --> 00:47:07,749Christmas card? Whatabout a birthday card?

116200:47:07,790 --> 00:47:09,917And don't even get mestarted on the candles...

116300:47:09,959 --> 00:47:11,927with the blowing and the

116400:47:11,961 --> 00:47:13,792for years with the blowing.

116500:47:15,865 --> 00:47:17,799

Yeah, all right. I tried.

1166



00:47:17,867 --> 00:47:21,132Well, uh, call me underdeveloped,

116700:47:21,170 --> 00:47:23,502but I'd like to hear more.

116800:47:25,708 --> 00:47:27,039Me too.

116900:47:27,076 --> 00:47:28,304More.

117000:47:28,377 --> 00:47:30,709You double-damn swearthis isn't some cockamamie

117100:47:30,780 --> 00:47:32,941science fiction story or...

117200:47:32,982 --> 00:47:34,313you're pulling on us?

117300:47:34,383 --> 00:47:36,783Next question.

117400:47:36,819 --> 00:47:38,184You-You-You realize

117500:47:38,221 --> 00:47:39,483this is an invitation

117600:47:39,522 --> 00:47:41,683to men in white suits with happy pills.

117700:47:41,724 --> 00:47:42,691Think about it.

117800:47:42,725 --> 00:47:44,590A mechanism allowing survival

117900:47:44,627 --> 00:47:45,924for thousands of years?

1180

00:47:45,995 --> 00:47:48,190Run out of room even faster.



118100:47:48,297 --> 00:47:50,527Then we'd have to go to Mars as a colony

118200:47:50,600 --> 00:47:52,431as we expanded, as we'd have to.

118300:47:52,501 --> 00:47:54,332I'd like that.

118400:47:54,403 --> 00:47:56,371On a planet of another star.

118500:47:56,405 --> 00:47:58,202I envy you.

118600:47:58,307 --> 00:48:00,605Did you have a pet dinosaur?

118700:48:00,643 --> 00:48:02,941They were a little bit before my time.

118800:48:02,979 --> 00:48:04,139At least something is.

118900:48:04,247 --> 00:48:07,273No doubt you could give usa thousand details, John,

119000:48:07,350 --> 00:48:08,339corroborating your story,

119100:48:08,384 --> 00:48:10,852from the Magdalene to the Buddha to now.

119200:48:10,887 --> 00:48:11,979Ten thousand,

119300:48:12,054 --> 00:48:13,646and you could stay out of the books.

119400:48:13,689 --> 00:48:16,089Oh, it's getting chilly.

119500:48:16,158 --> 00:48:18,353Here, come over here. Join me.



119600:48:20,696 --> 00:48:24,359That, uh, raises aninteresting question, John.

1197

00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:25,867Could there be others like you

119800:48:25,902 --> 00:48:28,097who escaped the agingprocess as you have?

119900:48:28,170 --> 00:48:29,467Representing something terrific

120000:48:29,505 --> 00:48:30,802we don't even know about in biology.

120100:48:30,873 --> 00:48:32,101We're learning all the time.

120200:48:32,174 --> 00:48:33,266Yeah, but how would he know?

1203

00:48:33,376 --> 00:48:36,368He doesn't wear an I.D. badgesaying "yabba dabba doo."

120400:48:36,412 --> 00:48:39,006There was a man in the 1600s.

120500:48:39,081 --> 00:48:41,572Where were you in 1292 A. D?

120600:48:41,684 --> 00:48:44,278Where were you a year ago on this date?

120700:48:46,923 --> 00:48:49,687Anyway, it was the1600s, and I met a man,

120800:48:49,725 --> 00:48:52,421and I had a hunch that he was...

120900:48:52,495 --> 00:48:54,326like me, so I told him.



121000:48:54,397 --> 00:48:58,163Ah. See, you said this was a first.

121100:48:58,200 --> 00:48:59,132

I forgot.

121200:48:59,201 --> 00:49:00,998A crack in your story, John?

121300:49:01,037 --> 00:49:03,028A touch of senility.

121400:49:03,072 --> 00:49:04,972

Anyway, he said yes,

121500:49:05,041 --> 00:49:07,032but from another time, another place.

121600:49:07,076 --> 00:49:08,543We talked for two days.

121700:49:08,644 --> 00:49:10,578It was all pretty convincing,

121800:49:10,646 --> 00:49:12,841But we couldn't be sure.

121900:49:12,882 --> 00:49:15,146We each confirmed what the other said,

122000:49:15,184 --> 00:49:17,414but how do we know if the confirmation

122100:49:17,453 --> 00:49:19,216was genuine or an echo?

122200:49:19,255 --> 00:49:20,950I knew I was kosher,

122300:49:20,990 --> 00:49:24,892but I thought, "maybe he'splaying a game on me."

122400:49:24,961 --> 00:49:28,260



You know, a scholarof all we spoke about.

122500:49:28,364 --> 00:49:31,356He said he was inclinedwith the same reservation.

122600:49:31,400 --> 00:49:32,560Now, that's interesting.

122700:49:32,668 --> 00:49:34,795Just as we can never be sure,

122800:49:34,870 --> 00:49:36,360even if we wanted to.

122900:49:36,405 --> 00:49:37,872I mean, if we were sure,

123000:49:37,974 --> 00:49:39,566you couldn't be sure of that.

123100:49:39,675 --> 00:49:41,700We parted, agreeing to keep in touch

123200:49:41,777 --> 00:49:43,176- of course, we didn't -

123300:49:43,212 --> 00:49:45,680and 200 years later I thought I saw him

123400:49:45,715 --> 00:49:47,945in a train station in Brussels.

123500:49:47,984 --> 00:49:49,508Lost him in the crowd.

123600:49:49,585 --> 00:49:51,678Oh, what a shame.

123700:49:51,721 --> 00:49:53,518l- I mean, if it were true.

1238

00:49:53,589 --> 00:49:55,284Okay, here's one for you.



123900:49:55,324 --> 00:49:57,622What do you do in your spare time?

124000:49:58,794 --> 00:49:59,886Every 50 years or so,

124100:49:59,929 --> 00:50:01,794when I wanna get away from the rush,

124200:50:01,831 --> 00:50:04,197I go down to a primitivetribe in New Guinea

124300:50:04,233 --> 00:50:06,599

where I'm worshipped as an immortal god,

124400:50:06,635 --> 00:50:09,001and they have a huge statue of me.

124500:50:09,038 --> 00:50:10,198It's a big party.

124600:50:10,239 --> 00:50:12,207Yeah, I've got a lot of pictures of it,

124700:50:12,241 --> 00:50:14,106but I've already packedthem up. I'm sorry.

124800:50:14,210 --> 00:50:17,907I won't make the obvious nastycrack about more unwashed cavemen.

124900:50:17,947 --> 00:50:19,244Actually, bathing was the style

125000:50:19,315 --> 00:50:21,180until the middle ageswhen the church told us

125100:50:21,217 --> 00:50:24,050it was sinful to wash away God's dirt,

1252

00:50:24,120 --> 00:50:25,246so people were sewn



125300:50:25,321 --> 00:50:26,948into their underwear in October

125400:50:27,023 --> 00:50:28,684and they popped out in April.

125500:50:28,724 --> 00:50:30,419You said you just happened.

125600:50:30,459 --> 00:50:32,290I don't believe that.

125700:50:32,328 --> 00:50:34,057If your story's true,

125800:50:34,130 --> 00:50:37,031why did God allow you to happen?

125900:50:37,066 --> 00:50:39,967That makes an interesting point.

126000:50:40,036 --> 00:50:41,628Are you religious, John?

126100:50:41,670 --> 00:50:44,195I don't follow a known religion. No.

126200:50:44,240 --> 00:50:45,229Ever.

126300:50:45,341 --> 00:50:47,571Long time ago I did,

126400:50:47,643 --> 00:50:49,838like most people.

126500:50:49,879 --> 00:50:51,676Some just never get over it.

126600:50:51,747 --> 00:50:53,078Do you believe in God?

1267

00:50:54,183 --> 00:50:55,946As Laplace said,



126800:50:55,985 --> 00:50:58,613"I have no need of that hypothesis."

126900:50:58,654 --> 00:51:00,144He may be around, though.

127000:51:00,189 --> 00:51:02,749He's everywhere. We just can't see him.

127100:51:02,792 --> 00:51:05,420Pfft. If this was the best I could do,

127200:51:05,494 --> 00:51:06,961I'd be hiding, too.

127300:51:06,996 --> 00:51:08,429And creation...

127400:51:08,497 --> 00:51:10,829It's here.- I'm not so sure it was created.

127500:51:10,900 --> 00:51:12,128What then?

127600:51:12,201 --> 00:51:15,728Maybe it's just accumulated,fields affecting fields.

127700:51:15,805 --> 00:51:18,433What about the sourceof the field energies?

127800:51:18,507 --> 00:51:20,407Wouldn't that imply a prime mover?

127900:51:20,443 --> 00:51:22,502I'd wonder about thesource of the prime mover,

128000:51:22,611 --> 00:51:25,739infinite regress, but thatdoesn't imply anything to me.

128100:51:25,815 --> 00:51:27,510Back to the mystery.



128200:51:27,616 --> 00:51:29,607It's a very old question,

128300:51:29,652 --> 00:51:33,520

But there's no answerexcept in religious terms.

128400:51:33,556 --> 00:51:36,218If you have faith, it's answered.

128500:51:36,325 --> 00:51:39,726Did you ever meet any personfrom our religious history?

128600:51:39,762 --> 00:51:41,753A biblical figure?

128700:51:41,831 --> 00:51:43,128In a way.

128800:51:43,165 --> 00:51:44,826Who?

1289

00:51:44,867 --> 00:51:46,334We should skip this one.

129000:51:46,368 --> 00:51:48,063No, no, no skipping. Come on.

129100:51:48,137 --> 00:51:49,297Next question.

129200:51:49,338 --> 00:51:50,737No, come on!

129300:51:52,141 --> 00:51:53,335Come on, spit it out!

129400:51:53,442 --> 00:51:55,034Good lord! You were one of them!

129500:51:55,077 --> 00:51:58,706

This is going in a directionthat I didn't expect.



129600:51:58,747 --> 00:52:01,841I hoped it wouldn't.We... call it a night.

129700:52:01,884 --> 00:52:05,047

Come on! You were someonein religious history?

129800:52:05,087 --> 00:52:06,281Yes.

129900:52:06,322 --> 00:52:07,812In the Bible?

1300

00:52:07,890 --> 00:52:08,788Yes.

130100:52:08,824 --> 00:52:09,882Someone we know?

130200:52:09,925 --> 00:52:11,950How could we not knowsomeone in the Bible?

1303

00:52:11,994 --> 00:52:13,427I mean somebody important.

130400:52:13,496 --> 00:52:14,827You may think you know him,

130500:52:14,897 --> 00:52:16,387but it's mostly myth.

130600:52:16,432 --> 00:52:19,765The entire Bible ismostly myth and allegory

130700:52:19,802 --> 00:52:23,135with maybe some basisin historical events.

130800:52:23,205 --> 00:52:27,471You were part of that history?

130900:52:27,510 --> 00:52:28,602Yes.



131000:52:29,712 --> 00:52:30,906Moses.

131100:52:31,013 --> 00:52:34,813

Moses was based on Misis, a Syrian myth,

131200:52:34,850 --> 00:52:36,681and there are earlier versions.

131300:52:36,719 --> 00:52:38,448All found floating on water,

131400:52:38,521 --> 00:52:41,046

the staff that changed to a snake,

131500:52:41,123 --> 00:52:43,591waters that were parted so followers

131600:52:43,626 --> 00:52:45,150could be led to freedom

131700:52:45,227 --> 00:52:46,626and even receive laws

131800:52:46,729 --> 00:52:48,253on stone or wooden tablets.

131900:52:48,330 --> 00:52:51,128One of the apostles.

132000:52:51,233 --> 00:52:53,599They weren't really apostles.

132100:52:53,636 --> 00:52:55,968They didn't do any real teaching.

132200:52:56,038 --> 00:52:59,337Peter the fisherman learneda little more about fishing.

132300:52:59,375 --> 00:53:01,309How do you know that?

132400:53:03,712 --> 00:53:06,704



The mythical overlay is so enormous...

132500:53:08,117 --> 00:53:10,108and not good.

1326

00:53:10,186 --> 00:53:16,318The truth is so, so simple.

132700:53:16,392 --> 00:53:20,089The New Testament in 100words or less: you ready?

132800:53:20,129 --> 00:53:21,687I don't think I wanna hear this.

132900:53:21,730 --> 00:53:23,197Harry, will you take me home?

133000:53:23,299 --> 00:53:25,096No, not right now.I do want to hear this.

133100:53:25,134 --> 00:53:27,500Sit down, Edith.You act like you believe him.

133200:53:27,536 --> 00:53:28,901It's sacrilege.

133300:53:28,938 --> 00:53:30,098How can it be sacrilege?

133400:53:30,206 --> 00:53:31,230He hasn't said anything yet.

133500:53:31,307 --> 00:53:33,901The new New Testament is sacrilege.

133600:53:33,943 --> 00:53:36,810There are a dozen new New Testaments,

133700:53:36,845 --> 00:53:39,678From Hebrew to Greekto Latin to Tyndale,

133800:53:39,715 --> 00:53:41,512



all the way to King James,

133900:53:41,550 --> 00:53:42,812all revisionist,

1340

00:53:42,851 --> 00:53:45,115and all called revealed truth.

134100:53:45,154 --> 00:53:48,317I mean a new New Testament in 100 words.

134200:53:48,357 --> 00:53:50,655I can give you the tencommandments in ten words:

134300:53:50,726 --> 00:53:52,216Don't. Don't, don't, don't,

134400:53:52,261 --> 00:53:54,058Don't, don't, don't,don't, don't, don't.

134500:53:54,129 --> 00:53:55,619Don't.

134600:53:55,731 --> 00:53:58,757The commandments are just modernupdates of more ancient laws.

134700:53:58,834 --> 00:54:00,563Hammurabi's code.

134800:54:00,636 --> 00:54:03,070That's right, theyweren't the first, right?

134900:54:03,105 --> 00:54:06,040Edith, I was raised on the Torah...

135000:54:06,075 --> 00:54:07,474My wife, on the Koran.

135100:54:07,576 --> 00:54:09,168My oldest son is an atheist.

135200:54:09,211 --> 00:54:11,008



My youngest is a Scientologist.

135300:54:11,080 --> 00:54:12,775My daughter is studying Hinduism.

1354

00:54:12,815 --> 00:54:17,081I imagine that there is room therefor a holy war in my living room,

135500:54:17,119 --> 00:54:19,280but we practice live and let live.

135600:54:20,623 --> 00:54:22,090Why don't you sit down?

135700:54:29,198 --> 00:54:32,099What is your preferredversion of the Bible?

135800:54:32,134 --> 00:54:33,533The King James, of course.

135900:54:33,602 --> 00:54:36,070It's the most modern, thework of great scholars.

136000:54:36,105 --> 00:54:37,595Modern is good.

136100:54:39,408 --> 00:54:41,603All right, John,hit us with the short form.

136200:54:43,646 --> 00:54:45,671Guy met the Buddha, liked what he heard,

136300:54:45,714 --> 00:54:47,511thought about it for a while -

136400:54:47,549 --> 00:54:49,312say 500 years, while he returned

136500:54:49,351 --> 00:54:51,319to the Mediterranean,

136600:54:51,353 --> 00:54:53,218



became an Etruscan.

136700:54:53,322 --> 00:54:54,983Seeped into the Roman empire.

1368

00:54:55,024 --> 00:54:56,719He didn't like what they became -

136900:54:56,759 --> 00:54:58,920A giant killing machine.

137000:54:59,028 --> 00:55:00,655He went to the Near East thinking,

1371

00:55:00,729 --> 00:55:03,926"Why not pass the Buddha'steachings on in a modern form."

137200:55:03,966 --> 00:55:06,161So he tried.

137300:55:06,201 --> 00:55:08,362One dissident against Rome?

1374

00:55:08,404 --> 00:55:09,496Rome won.

137500:55:09,571 --> 00:55:10,902The rest is history.

137600:55:10,973 --> 00:55:13,464Well, sort of. Lot offairy tales mixed in.

137700:55:16,278 --> 00:55:18,212I knew it.

137800:55:18,280 --> 00:55:20,214He's saying he was Christ.

137900:55:20,282 --> 00:55:22,079Oh, no. That's the medal

1380

00:55:22,184 --> 00:55:24,482they pinned on Jesusto fulfill prophecy.



138100:55:24,520 --> 00:55:25,680The crucifixion.

138200:55:25,721 --> 00:55:28,713

He blocked the painas he had learned to do

138300:55:28,791 --> 00:55:30,088in Tibet and India.

138400:55:30,125 --> 00:55:32,491He also learned toslow his body processes

138500:55:32,528 --> 00:55:35,122down to the point wherethey were undetectable.

138600:55:35,197 --> 00:55:36,562They thought he was dead.

138700:55:36,598 --> 00:55:37,895So his followers pulled him

138800:55:38,000 --> 00:55:40,230from the cross, placed him in a cave...

138900:55:40,302 --> 00:55:42,930His body normalized ashe had trained it to.

139000:55:44,206 --> 00:55:46,640He attempted to go away undetected,

139100:55:46,709 --> 00:55:49,143but some devotees were standing watch.

139200:55:50,612 --> 00:55:53,012Tried to explain.

139300:55:53,048 --> 00:55:55,414They were ecstatic.

139400:55:55,517 --> 00:55:57,917Thus, I was resurrected,



139500:55:58,020 --> 00:55:59,988and I ascended to central Europe

139600:56:00,022 --> 00:56:01,887

to get away as far as possible.

139700:56:01,957 --> 00:56:04,425You don't mean a word of this, John.

139800:56:04,460 --> 00:56:06,428My God, why are you doing this?

139900:56:06,462 --> 00:56:07,986

Let me see your wrists.

140000:56:08,063 --> 00:56:09,462I don't scar.

140100:56:09,498 --> 00:56:11,090Besides, they tied me...

140200:56:11,166 --> 00:56:14,329but nails and blood make

better religious art.

140300:56:14,370 --> 00:56:17,498All the speculations about Jesus.

140400:56:17,573 --> 00:56:19,268He was black, he was Asian,

140500:56:19,308 --> 00:56:21,776he was a blue-eyed Aryanwith a golden beard

140600:56:21,810 --> 00:56:24,210and hair straight outof Vidal Sassoon's,

140700:56:24,279 --> 00:56:27,442He was a benevolent alien,he never existed at all.

140800:56:27,483 --> 00:56:29,576Now he's a caveman.



140900:56:29,618 --> 00:56:32,712The Christ figure goes allthe way back to Krishna -

1410

00:56:32,788 --> 00:56:33,777Hercules, of course.

141100:56:33,822 --> 00:56:34,789Hercules?

141200:56:34,823 --> 00:56:37,519Born of a virgin, Alcmene.

1413

00:56:37,593 --> 00:56:40,187A god for a father, Zeus.

141400:56:40,229 --> 00:56:42,789The only begotten.

141500:56:42,831 --> 00:56:45,391The savior- The Greek? Soter.

1416

00:56:45,501 --> 00:56:47,594The good shepherd, the prince of peace,

141700:56:47,636 --> 00:56:50,161bringing gentle persuasionand divine wisdom.

141800:56:50,205 --> 00:56:53,003He died, joined his father on Olympus

141900:56:53,041 --> 00:56:55,737a thousand years before Gethsemane.

142000:56:55,811 --> 00:56:59,679How can you compare paganmythology to the true word?

142100:56:59,715 --> 00:57:02,183Pretty damn closely, I'd say.

142200:57:02,251 --> 00:57:04,651The early Christian leaders,



142300:57:04,686 --> 00:57:06,586they threw away Hebrew manuscripts

142400:57:06,655 --> 00:57:09,556

and borrowed from pagansources all over the place.

142500:57:09,591 --> 00:57:12,151Do you realize how...

142600:57:12,261 --> 00:57:14,456inconsiderately you'retreating my feelings?

142700:57:14,496 --> 00:57:17,988About as inconsideratelyas we're treating John's.

142800:57:18,066 --> 00:57:20,261Well, he doesn'tbelieve what he's saying!

142900:57:20,302 --> 00:57:22,862Do you believe literally

everything in the Bible, Edith?

143000:57:22,905 --> 00:57:23,963Yes!

143100:57:24,072 --> 00:57:25,369Before you say it,

143200:57:25,474 --> 00:57:28,102I know it's undergone a lot of changes,

143300:57:28,177 --> 00:57:30,611But God has spoken through man

143400:57:30,679 --> 00:57:32,613to make his word clearer.

143500:57:32,681 --> 00:57:35,081He couldn't get it right the first time?

143600:57:35,117 --> 00:57:38,314



We're imperfect! He had towork to make us understand.

143700:57:38,387 --> 00:57:41,481He couldn't get us rightthe first time, Edith?

143800:57:41,523 --> 00:57:44,321Taken alone, thephilosophical teachings of Jesus

143900:57:44,393 --> 00:57:46,418are Buddhism with a Hebrew accent.

144000:57:46,495 --> 00:57:50,261

Kindness, tolerance, brotherhood, love,

144100:57:50,299 --> 00:57:51,926a ruthless realism acknowledging

144200:57:52,000 --> 00:57:55,231that life is as it is hereon Earth, here and now.

144300:57:55,304 --> 00:57:58,364

The kingdom of God, meaning goodness,

144400:57:58,407 --> 00:58:01,399is right here, where it should be.

144500:58:01,443 --> 00:58:03,468"I am what I am becoming."

144600:58:03,545 --> 00:58:05,103That's what the Buddha brought in.

144700:58:05,147 --> 00:58:06,478And that's what I taught.

144800:58:06,548 --> 00:58:09,517But a talking snakemake a lady eat an apple,

144900:58:09,551 --> 00:58:10,643

So we're screwed.

1450



00:58:10,686 --> 00:58:12,176Heaven and hell were peddled

145100:58:12,254 --> 00:58:15,485so priests could rulethrough seduction and terror,

145200:58:15,557 --> 00:58:18,754save our souls that we neverlost in the first place.

145300:58:18,794 --> 00:58:20,352I threw a clean pass...

145400:58:20,462 --> 00:58:22,521

they ran it out of the ballpark.

145500:58:22,564 --> 00:58:25,260This is blasphemy.

145600:58:25,300 --> 00:58:28,098It's horrible! Who else were you?

145700:58:28,170 --> 00:58:30,434Solomon, Elvis, Jack the ripper?

145800:58:30,472 --> 00:58:32,531It's been said that Buddha and Jesus

145900:58:32,574 --> 00:58:34,633would laugh or cry if they'd known

146000:58:34,676 --> 00:58:36,075what was done in their name.

146100:58:36,111 --> 00:58:37,908And if there is a creator,

146200:58:37,980 --> 00:58:40,778he'd probably feel the same way.

146300:58:40,816 --> 00:58:43,376I see ceremony, ritual, processions,

146400:58:43,418 --> 00:58:46,080genuflecting, moaning, intoning,



146500:58:46,121 --> 00:58:48,783venerating cookies and wine,

146600:58:48,824 --> 00:58:50,519

and I think...

146700:58:50,592 --> 00:58:51,957It's not what I had in mind.

146800:58:51,994 --> 00:58:53,291But that's Vatican flapdoodle.

146900:58:53,328 --> 00:58:55,796

It doesn't have a thing to do with God.

147000:58:55,831 --> 00:58:58,959As you said, John,everywhere, religions...

147100:58:59,001 --> 00:59:02,061from exalting life topurging joy as a sin.

1472

00:59:02,137 --> 00:59:04,731Rome does it as grand opera.

147300:59:06,041 --> 00:59:07,770A simple path to goodness needs

147400:59:07,843 --> 00:59:09,777a supernatural roadmap.

147500:59:09,845 --> 00:59:11,870Supernatural...

147600:59:11,947 --> 00:59:14,541A stupid word, I mean...

147700:59:14,650 --> 00:59:16,515Anything that happens,happens within nature,

1478

00:59:16,552 --> 00:59:18,645whether we believe in it or not.



147900:59:18,687 --> 00:59:20,746Like a 14,000-year-old caveman.

148000:59:29,598 --> 00:59:31,725l- l-I drove for a while,

148100:59:31,767 --> 00:59:33,894and then I sat for a while.

148200:59:33,969 --> 00:59:35,266I'm so ashamed.

148300:59:35,370 --> 00:59:37,031And I'm freezing.

148400:59:37,072 --> 00:59:38,266Well, come inside.

148500:59:38,373 --> 00:59:40,466I still don't believe you, of course.

148600:59:40,509 --> 00:59:41,476You need help.

148700:59:41,577 --> 00:59:42,509Everybody needs help.

148800:59:42,578 --> 00:59:44,671Yes, well, some more than others.

148900:59:58,694 --> 01:00:00,787From the Buddha to the cross,

149001:00:00,829 --> 01:00:05,528I have always imaginedboth as entirely mythic -

149101:00:05,601 --> 01:00:07,899but I would like to hear more.

149201:00:08,003 --> 01:00:10,631May I lie on the couch for a moment?

149301:00:10,706 --> 01:00:13,300I'm not as young as I used to be.



149401:00:16,011 --> 01:00:17,000Ohh!

149501:00:19,214 --> 01:00:23,207

So, you were Jesus.

149601:00:23,251 --> 01:00:26,345Well, perhaps somebody had tobe, for better or for worse.

149701:00:26,421 --> 01:00:28,048The jury is still out.

1498

01:00:28,123 --> 01:00:31,115When did you begin tobelieve you were Jesus?

149901:00:31,159 --> 01:00:34,253When did you begin to believeyou were a psychiatrist?

150001:00:34,329 --> 01:00:37,321Since I graduated Harvard medical school

150101:00:37,432 --> 01:00:40,094and finished my residency,I've had that feeling.

150201:00:40,135 --> 01:00:42,365Oh, I sometimes dream about it.

150301:00:42,437 --> 01:00:44,564Have you acted upon this belief?

150401:00:44,640 --> 01:00:47,006I had a private practice for a while,

150501:00:47,042 --> 01:00:48,509and then I taught.

150601:00:48,543 --> 01:00:49,942Nothing unusual -

150701:00:49,978 --> 01:00:53,243oh, until one day, I met a caveman



150801:00:53,281 --> 01:00:55,806who thought he was Jesus.

150901:00:55,851 --> 01:00:58,285

Do you find that unusual?

151001:00:58,353 --> 01:01:00,787Very. I would stake my reputation

151101:01:00,856 --> 01:01:03,086he is as sane as I am,

151201:01:03,191 --> 01:01:06,092

so why does he persist in such a story?

151301:01:06,128 --> 01:01:08,255There must be a reason, though.

151401:01:08,296 --> 01:01:10,161Unless I imagined it all?

151501:01:10,198 --> 01:01:11,392Is that possible?

151601:01:11,500 --> 01:01:13,297I think you're as sane as he is.

151701:01:13,335 --> 01:01:15,030Oh, God, l-

151801:01:15,103 --> 01:01:16,730No.

151901:01:18,306 --> 01:01:21,241Did you ever find itprudent to worship yourself

152001:01:21,309 --> 01:01:23,038rather than be thought a heretic?

152101:01:23,111 --> 01:01:24,237That would be something.

152201:01:24,312 --> 01:01:26,837



Other times, Christianitywas considered heresy.

152301:01:26,915 --> 01:01:28,610I had to pretend other faiths.

152401:01:28,650 --> 01:01:32,711And what does Jesus haveto say to those present

152501:01:32,754 --> 01:01:35,120who find it difficult to believe in him?

152601:01:35,157 --> 01:01:37,751Believe in what he tried to teach,

152701:01:37,826 --> 01:01:39,726without rigmarole.

152801:01:39,761 --> 01:01:42,423Piety is not what thelessons bring to people.

152901:01:42,464 --> 01:01:45,126It's the mistake they

bring to the lessons.

153001:01:52,541 --> 01:01:55,271Well, it's getting to be night.

153101:01:56,778 --> 01:01:58,939I still have stuff to carry

153201:01:58,980 --> 01:02:01,244and a long drive.

153301:02:01,283 --> 01:02:02,773I'll help.

153401:02:02,818 --> 01:02:06,413John, do you havea destination in mind?

153501:02:07,789 --> 01:02:09,154

Never mind.

1536



01:02:09,191 --> 01:02:10,590I won't ask.

153701:02:11,626 --> 01:02:12,615Thank you.

153801:02:20,001 --> 01:02:22,799Anyone mentally ill can imagine

153901:02:22,838 --> 01:02:25,830a fantastic background,even an entire life,

154001:02:25,907 --> 01:02:28,102and sincerely believe it.

154101:02:28,210 --> 01:02:30,735The man who thinks he is Napoleon

154201:02:30,812 --> 01:02:32,609does believe it.

154301:02:32,714 --> 01:02:35,581His true identity has taken a backseat

154401:02:35,617 --> 01:02:38,518to his delusion and the need for it.

154501:02:38,553 --> 01:02:40,521If that's the case with John,

154601:02:40,555 --> 01:02:42,523there is a grave disorder.

154701:02:42,557 --> 01:02:44,923Organized brilliantly.

154801:02:45,026 --> 01:02:47,017He's got an answer for everything.

154901:02:47,129 --> 01:02:49,723It might involverejection of his father,

155001:02:49,765 --> 01:02:51,392of his entire early past,



155101:02:51,433 --> 01:02:53,025replaced by this fantasy.

155201:02:53,068 --> 01:02:55,161

He says he can't remember his father.

155301:02:55,237 --> 01:02:56,135Precisely why?

155401:02:56,238 --> 01:02:57,762You said he was sane.

155501:02:57,839 --> 01:02:59,067

Did I?

155601:03:00,542 --> 01:03:02,908Do you think that perhaps our caveman

155701:03:02,978 --> 01:03:04,707has a monkey on his back?

155801:03:04,780 --> 01:03:06,270Drugs?

155901:03:06,381 --> 01:03:07,780No, no, no, no.

156001:03:07,816 --> 01:03:10,250I've done a lot of consultingwork with narcotics.

156101:03:10,285 --> 01:03:12,344I've seen people tripping, strung out...

156201:03:12,387 --> 01:03:14,446Whatever's up with John, it isn't that.

156301:03:14,489 --> 01:03:16,320I've looked for signs - none.

156401:03:16,391 --> 01:03:18,120Could cavemen really talk?

156501:03:18,193 --> 01:03:20,593



We think that languagecame into existence

156601:03:20,629 --> 01:03:21,82360,000 years ago.

156701:03:21,897 --> 01:03:23,888The structure of stone age culture

156801:03:23,932 --> 01:03:26,196is evidence of theability to communicate -

156901:03:26,234 --> 01:03:27,599verbally.

157001:03:29,337 --> 01:03:31,498Oh, shut up.

157101:03:40,649 --> 01:03:42,844Maybe it'd be easier if I were.

157201:03:42,918 --> 01:03:44,010Crazy?

157301:03:45,320 --> 01:03:46,810No.

157401:04:00,035 --> 01:04:02,663That is fascinating, isn't it,

157501:04:02,704 --> 01:04:05,798a brave attempt to teachBuddhism in the west.

157601:04:05,874 --> 01:04:07,535It's no wonder he failed.

157701:04:07,576 --> 01:04:09,168We're not ready for it.

157801:04:09,277 --> 01:04:11,677You're talkingas if you believed him.

157901:04:11,713 --> 01:04:13,840



Well, it is possible, isn't it?

158001:04:13,882 --> 01:04:15,850I mean, anything is possible.

1581

01:04:15,884 --> 01:04:18,079Look, we have two simple choices.

158201:04:18,119 --> 01:04:20,280We can get all bent out of shape

158301:04:20,322 --> 01:04:22,688intellectualizing orbench-pressing logic,

158401:04:22,724 --> 01:04:25,318or we can simply relax and enjoy it.

158501:04:25,393 --> 01:04:27,088I can listen critically,

158601:04:27,195 --> 01:04:30,528but I don't have to makeup my mind about anything.

158701:04:30,599 --> 01:04:31,998But you think you do?

158801:04:32,033 --> 01:04:34,729Well, unfortunately, there'sno authorities on prehistory,

158901:04:34,803 --> 01:04:36,498so we couldn't stop him there.

159001:04:36,605 --> 01:04:38,368There are experts on the Bible.

159101:04:38,406 --> 01:04:39,930Dream on.

159201:04:40,008 --> 01:04:42,306Yeah, thus the lost years of Jesus.

159301:04:42,344 --> 01:04:45,006He didn't exist until John put on a hat.



159401:04:45,046 --> 01:04:49,073I don't believe in angels and theNativity and the star in the east,

1595

01:04:49,117 --> 01:04:52,211but there are stories aboutthe childhood of Jesus.

159601:04:52,254 --> 01:04:54,620History hates a vacuum.

159701:04:54,656 --> 01:04:57,216Improvisation, some of it very sincere,

159801:04:57,259 --> 01:04:58,317fills the gaps.

159901:04:58,426 --> 01:04:59,723It would have been easy

160001:04:59,761 --> 01:05:02,559to falsify a past back then.

1601

01:05:02,664 --> 01:05:05,997A few words, credulity...time would do the rest.

160201:05:06,067 --> 01:05:08,092Now you're talking asif you believed him.

160301:05:08,169 --> 01:05:10,569Well, look at thepopular myths surrounding

160401:05:10,605 --> 01:05:13,005the Kennedy assassinationin a few short years.

160501:05:13,074 --> 01:05:16,043You had, uh, conspiracy, mafia, CIA.

160601:05:16,077 --> 01:05:18,978

That's a mystique that'll never go away.

1607



01:05:19,080 --> 01:05:22,880It's always been a small stepfrom a fallen leader to a god.

160801:05:22,918 --> 01:05:25,716I don't think anybody

will deify Kennedy.

160901:05:25,787 --> 01:05:27,721We're more sophisticated than that.

161001:05:27,789 --> 01:05:29,256We are?

161101:05:29,291 --> 01:05:30,883

We are.

161201:05:34,496 --> 01:05:36,726Well, you're finally fulfilling

161301:05:36,798 --> 01:05:39,028one prophecy about the millennium, John.

161401:05:39,100 --> 01:05:40,965What's that?

161501:05:41,002 --> 01:05:42,833Here you are again.

161601:05:52,447 --> 01:05:54,415You like the fire, John.

161701:05:54,449 --> 01:05:57,941Everywhere I've lived,I've had a fireplace.

161801:05:58,019 --> 01:06:00,453Childhood fixation, I guess.

161901:06:02,057 --> 01:06:04,082Helps me to feel secure.

162001:06:05,493 --> 01:06:07,552There are predators out there.

162101:06:09,998 --> 01:06:11,795



One thing I didn't pack...

162201:06:11,866 --> 01:06:13,663I thought I might need it.

1623

01:06:20,875 --> 01:06:24,174Wouldn't Sacre du printempsbe more appropriate?

162401:06:24,212 --> 01:06:25,270What?

162501:06:26,881 --> 01:06:28,906You've got...

162601:06:28,984 --> 01:06:32,147four men of sciencecompletely baffled, my friend.

162701:06:32,187 --> 01:06:34,678We-We don't know what to make of you.

162801:06:34,723 --> 01:06:37,487Did you know Voltairewas the first to suggest

162901:06:37,525 --> 01:06:40,961that the universe was createdby a gigantic explosion?

163001:06:40,996 --> 01:06:43,226I think Paul would agree.

163101:06:43,298 --> 01:06:45,698And then Goethe was the first to suggest

163201:06:45,734 --> 01:06:49,636that spiral nebulae wereswirling masses of stars.

163301:06:49,704 --> 01:06:51,797We now call them galaxies.

163401:06:51,840 --> 01:06:54,502

It's kind of funny howoften new concepts of science



163501:06:54,609 --> 01:06:57,476find their first tentativeforms of expression in the arts.

163601:06:57,512 --> 01:07:01,539

So did Beethoven do physics on the side?

163701:07:01,583 --> 01:07:05,679He spent most of histime lying on the floor

163801:07:05,754 --> 01:07:07,346in front of his legless piano

1639

01:07:07,455 --> 01:07:10,151surrounded by orangepeels and apple cores.

164001:07:12,360 --> 01:07:15,158Now we're on the floorlistening to Beethoven.

164101:07:16,398 --> 01:07:17,888Full circle.

164201:07:17,966 --> 01:07:20,264Did you have, um...

164301:07:21,369 --> 01:07:23,064any religious beliefs,

164401:07:23,104 --> 01:07:25,334or did you give it much thought?

164501:07:25,373 --> 01:07:27,603You can't get there with thought.

164601:07:27,675 --> 01:07:29,267You have faith?

164701:07:29,310 --> 01:07:30,868In a lot of things.

1648

01:07:30,979 --> 01:07:34,005Do you have faith inthe future of the race?



164901:07:34,082 --> 01:07:35,982I've seen species come and go.

165001:07:36,017 --> 01:07:38,076

Depends on their balancewith the environment.

165101:07:39,788 --> 01:07:41,483We've made a mess of it.

165201:07:41,523 --> 01:07:43,184There's still time,

1653

01:07:43,224 --> 01:07:44,816if we use it well.

165401:07:44,893 --> 01:07:47,589Christianity has been a worldwide belief

165501:07:47,629 --> 01:07:49,290for 2,000 years.

165601:07:49,330 --> 01:07:51,525

How long did the Egyptians worship Isis

165701:07:51,599 --> 01:07:53,123or the Sumerians Ishtar?

165801:07:53,201 --> 01:07:55,829In India, sacred cows wandered freely

165901:07:55,904 --> 01:07:57,633as reincarnated souls.

166001:07:57,705 --> 01:07:59,366In a thousand years,they'll be barbecued

166101:07:59,407 --> 01:08:00,999and their souls will be in squirrels.

166201:08:01,042 --> 01:08:02,373

You weren't Jesus!

1663



01:08:04,446 --> 01:08:05,640Oh, Edith.

166401:08:08,450 --> 01:08:11,180lf... it rains...It won't.

166501:08:11,252 --> 01:08:12,549How do you know that?

166601:08:12,587 --> 01:08:13,952I don't smell it.

166701:08:17,392 --> 01:08:18,359Were you...

166801:08:19,661 --> 01:08:21,891I guess... a medicine man?

166901:08:21,963 --> 01:08:24,090I was a shaman a few times.

167001:08:24,165 --> 01:08:27,498I revealed some truthsto eat a little better.

167101:08:27,569 --> 01:08:30,561You think that's allreligion is about...

167201:08:30,605 --> 01:08:33,096selling hope and survival?

167301:08:33,174 --> 01:08:35,699The Old Testament sells fear and guilt.

167401:08:35,777 --> 01:08:38,245The New Testament isa good code of ethics,

167501:08:38,279 --> 01:08:40,713put into my mouth bypoets and philosophers

1676

01:08:40,782 --> 01:08:42,841that are much smarter than I am.



167701:08:42,884 --> 01:08:44,909The message is never practiced.

167801:08:46,087 --> 01:08:47,714Fairy tales build churches.

167901:08:48,790 --> 01:08:50,917What about the name "Jesus"?

168001:08:50,992 --> 01:08:53,085Did you pull that out of a hat?

168101:08:53,128 --> 01:08:55,460I called myself John.

168201:08:55,497 --> 01:08:57,727I almost always do.

168301:08:57,799 --> 01:08:59,790As tales of the resurrection spread,

168401:08:59,834 --> 01:09:02,564the name was confusedwith the Hebrew "Yochanan,"

168501:09:02,637 --> 01:09:04,400Meaning "God is gracious."

168601:09:04,439 --> 01:09:06,168My stay on Earth was seen

168701:09:06,241 --> 01:09:09,870as divine proof of immortality.

168801:09:09,944 --> 01:09:13,539That led to "God is salvation"

168901:09:13,581 --> 01:09:15,048or Hebrew "Yahshua,"

169001:09:15,083 --> 01:09:18,246which in translationbecame my proper name,

169101:09:18,286 --> 01:09:20,880



changing to late Greek, "lesous,"

169201:09:20,955 --> 01:09:23,446then to late Latin, "lesus,"

1693

01:09:23,491 --> 01:09:26,051and finally medieval Latin, "Jesus,"

169401:09:26,161 --> 01:09:29,096and it was a wonderto watch it all happen.

169501:09:29,164 --> 01:09:32,224Then you didn't claimto be the son of God?

169601:09:32,267 --> 01:09:35,293Began as a schoolhouseand ended as a temple.

169701:09:35,370 --> 01:09:38,931I said I had a master thatwas greater than myself.

169801:09:38,973 --> 01:09:40,941

I never said he was my father.

169901:09:40,975 --> 01:09:42,875I wanted to teach what I learned.

170001:09:42,977 --> 01:09:44,968I never claimed to be king of the Jews,

170101:09:45,079 --> 01:09:48,173I never walked on water,I never raised the dead.

170201:09:48,216 --> 01:09:51,515I never spoke of divineexcept in the sense

170301:09:51,586 --> 01:09:53,679of human goodness on Earth.

1704

01:09:57,225 --> 01:10:00,820No wise men came from theeast to worship at a manger.



170501:10:00,862 --> 01:10:02,921I did do a little healing

170601:10:02,997 --> 01:10:04,828

with some eastern medicine I'd learned.

170701:10:07,635 --> 01:10:08,727That's it.

170801:10:12,540 --> 01:10:14,405The three wise men began as a myth

170901:10:14,442 --> 01:10:16,307

about the birth of the Buddha.

171001:10:21,049 --> 01:10:25,008John, I should be home,uh, kissing my wife.

171101:10:27,222 --> 01:10:29,383We're all here, trapped by your story...

171201:10:30,858 --> 01:10:36,626

hoping for a...revolution? I don't know.

171301:10:39,968 --> 01:10:41,902Are there any, uh...

171401:10:41,936 --> 01:10:43,870more revelations for us?

171501:10:50,345 --> 01:10:52,245It's just like old times.

171601:10:58,886 --> 01:11:00,854You weren't Jesus.

171701:11:03,691 --> 01:11:05,989Quote the sermon on the mount.

171801:11:06,027 --> 01:11:07,289

Which one?

1719



01:11:07,328 --> 01:11:10,525Darby, King James,new American standard?

172001:11:10,598 --> 01:11:12,361Do you know them all?

172101:11:12,433 --> 01:11:15,596No one knows the one, not even me.

172201:11:15,637 --> 01:11:16,899I...

172301:11:17,005 --> 01:11:19,269I did some teaching on a hill one day.

172401:11:19,307 --> 01:11:21,332Not that many people stayed.

172501:11:21,376 --> 01:11:22,434But you...

172601:11:22,510 --> 01:11:24,501Biblical Jesus said,

172701:11:24,545 --> 01:11:26,979"Who do you think I am?"

172801:11:27,015 --> 01:11:29,415He gave them a choice.

172901:11:30,952 --> 01:11:32,317I'm giving you one.

173001:11:35,323 --> 01:11:36,654Were you?

173101:11:38,660 --> 01:11:41,322If I said no, could you ever be sure?

173201:11:58,479 --> 01:12:00,413Turn that off.

1733

01:12:00,448 --> 01:12:01,312Please.



173401:12:04,419 --> 01:12:06,410This has gone far enough.

173501:12:06,487 --> 01:12:08,387It's gone much too far.

173601:12:08,489 --> 01:12:10,980These people are very upset.

173701:12:11,025 --> 01:12:13,493I don't believe you're mad,

173801:12:13,594 --> 01:12:15,824But what you're saying is not true.

173901:12:16,998 --> 01:12:19,796That leaves only one explanation.

174001:12:21,002 --> 01:12:23,061The time has come when you must admit

174101:12:23,104 --> 01:12:24,298this is a hoax...

174201:12:26,007 --> 01:12:27,201A lie.

174301:12:27,308 --> 01:12:30,869Isn't that true, John?

174401:12:30,945 --> 01:12:33,709If you don't drop this now- If you can -

174501:12:33,748 --> 01:12:35,215I'll be convinced

174601:12:35,316 --> 01:12:38,217that you need a great deal of attention.

174701:12:38,252 --> 01:12:41,187I can have you committedfor observation.

174801:12:41,222 --> 01:12:42,849



You know that.

174901:12:42,890 --> 01:12:44,790I ask you now

1750

01:12:44,826 --> 01:12:46,657- I demand it -

175101:12:46,728 --> 01:12:49,754that you tell these people the truth.

175201:12:49,831 --> 01:12:53,062Give them closure.

1753

01:12:53,134 --> 01:12:56,331It's time, John.

175401:12:56,371 --> 01:12:57,531Please.

175501:13:11,185 --> 01:13:13,915End of the line. Everybody off.

175601:13:17,191 --> 01:13:19,125

What?!

175701:13:19,193 --> 01:13:21,320It was a story.

175801:13:21,396 --> 01:13:23,489It was all a story.

175901:13:24,499 --> 01:13:25,397Good God!

176001:13:27,201 --> 01:13:28,964Another fairy tale?

176101:13:29,003 --> 01:13:30,698All of it? But what..?

176201:13:30,738 --> 01:13:32,103What in the name of heaven?

176301:13:32,206 --> 01:13:34,401



John, you had us wonderingwhether you were sane or not,

176401:13:34,442 --> 01:13:36,000and it's just a story!

176501:13:36,043 --> 01:13:39,342Where'd you come off with sucha half-baked, asinine idea?

176601:13:39,414 --> 01:13:41,143At least you're relieved I'm not a nut.

176701:13:41,215 --> 01:13:42,807I'd prefer you were!

176801:13:42,850 --> 01:13:44,442You gave me the idea.

176901:13:44,519 --> 01:13:45,850All of you.

177001:13:45,920 --> 01:13:47,148Come again?

177101:13:47,221 --> 01:13:48,779Edith saw my fake Van Gogh.

177201:13:48,823 --> 01:13:50,222You could have just told me.

177301:13:50,258 --> 01:13:51,850You commented that I never age.

177401:13:51,926 --> 01:13:53,450You gave me the book on early man.

177501:13:53,528 --> 01:13:55,018Dan, you spotted the burin

177601:13:55,129 --> 01:13:56,756and you said, "if stones could speak."

1777

01:13:56,831 --> 01:13:58,355I knew it.



177801:13:58,433 --> 01:14:00,833I got the notion, I ran it past you

177901:14:00,868 --> 01:14:03,393to check your reactions,

and I took it too far.

178001:14:03,471 --> 01:14:04,768Too far?

178101:14:04,806 --> 01:14:06,273Check my reaction.

178201:14:06,307 --> 01:14:08,867

You asked if I was a figurefrom religious history,

178301:14:08,910 --> 01:14:10,377if there were others like me,

178401:14:10,411 --> 01:14:11,810if I'd created future identities.

178501:14:11,879 --> 01:14:15,007

We were chasing ourtails around the maypole,

178601:14:15,082 --> 01:14:18,176enjoying the mystery,the analytical stretch.

178701:14:18,219 --> 01:14:20,119You were playing my game!

178801:14:20,188 --> 01:14:21,678I was playing yours.

178901:14:21,722 --> 01:14:24,316Oh, man, you know,you had us going, right?

179001:14:24,392 --> 01:14:25,518You were good, man.

179101:14:25,593 --> 01:14:27,026You know those Chinese boxes,



179201:14:27,094 --> 01:14:30,154one inside the other insidethe other inside the other?

1793

01:14:30,198 --> 01:14:33,224I feel like I'm in the last box.

179401:14:33,301 --> 01:14:35,531You son of a...

179501:14:35,603 --> 01:14:36,535bitch!

1796

01:14:36,604 --> 01:14:38,128How could you do this to us?

179701:14:38,206 --> 01:14:40,197I was worried about you.

179801:14:40,241 --> 01:14:42,573I know, I was temptedto cop out many times,

1799

01:14:42,610 --> 01:14:44,942But I couldn't resistseeing whether or not

180001:14:45,012 --> 01:14:46,707you could refute what I was saying.

180101:14:46,747 --> 01:14:48,647I had the perfect audience.

180201:14:48,716 --> 01:14:50,547Anthropologist, archaeologist,

180301:14:50,618 --> 01:14:52,643Christian literalist...

180401:14:52,720 --> 01:14:54,813a psychologist.

1805

01:14:54,856 --> 01:14:56,915Okay, I've had enough of this.



180601:14:56,958 --> 01:14:59,017I'm outta here.You wanna come? Let's go.

180701:15:00,161 --> 01:15:01,287

So, John.

180801:15:01,362 --> 01:15:02,954Are you gonna write the story?

180901:15:02,997 --> 01:15:04,589If I do, I'll send you copies.

181001:15:04,665 --> 01:15:06,826

Don't bother with mine, okay?

181101:15:06,868 --> 01:15:09,063You are absolutely certifiable.

181201:15:09,103 --> 01:15:10,798I don't know you!

181301:15:13,174 --> 01:15:15,506It was nice seeing

you again, Dr. Oldman.

181401:15:16,978 --> 01:15:18,707Your name's a pun, isn't it?

181501:15:18,779 --> 01:15:19,711Old man?

181601:15:21,616 --> 01:15:24,210Did that help you with your story?

181701:15:24,285 --> 01:15:25,809Linda!

181801:15:27,488 --> 01:15:28,580Bye.

181901:15:32,026 --> 01:15:33,994Well, Art was half right.

182001:15:35,530 --> 01:15:36,997



Which half?

182101:15:39,800 --> 01:15:42,792Well, at least I don'thave to throw away half

182201:15:42,837 --> 01:15:44,600of what I know about biology.

182301:15:44,639 --> 01:15:46,231Which half?

182401:15:47,842 --> 01:15:49,901It's a beautiful idea,

182501:15:49,944 --> 01:15:53,812so rich, so full of possibilities.

182601:15:55,116 --> 01:15:57,175Perhaps you should writea paper on it, doctor.

182701:15:57,218 --> 01:15:58,913Maybe I will.

182801:15:58,953 --> 01:16:01,046I'll interview you in the rubber room

182901:16:01,088 --> 01:16:02,555for further details.

183001:16:02,590 --> 01:16:04,649You may still need help, my friend.

183101:16:18,172 --> 01:16:19,571My ass.

183201:16:19,674 --> 01:16:21,767I thought it sounded pretty good.

183301:16:21,809 --> 01:16:23,902They believe you because they have to.

1834

01:16:23,978 --> 01:16:25,969But the one thing that I know about you



183501:16:26,013 --> 01:16:27,503is that you would never use people

183601:16:27,582 --> 01:16:29,311or abuse their goodwill and intelligence

183701:16:29,383 --> 01:16:31,044like they think you'vejust done to them.

183801:16:31,085 --> 01:16:32,177Psych 101?

183901:16:32,219 --> 01:16:34,779

No, it's woman,one-on-one.

184001:16:34,822 --> 01:16:37,586So you're a pretty fast liar, Mr. Ugg,

184101:16:37,625 --> 01:16:40,321But I wanna know:What's your real name?

1842

01:16:40,394 --> 01:16:45,331Believe it or not, thesound was always John.

184301:16:45,399 --> 01:16:47,264Why'd you cave to Gruber?

184401:16:47,301 --> 01:16:48,928What happened was enough.

184501:16:49,003 --> 01:16:50,493Just-just needed to stop.

184601:16:50,605 --> 01:16:52,732I shouldn't have expected it to work.

184701:16:54,141 --> 01:16:56,075Fourteen thousand years old.

1848

01:16:56,110 --> 01:16:58,044I bet that's a lot of women.



184901:16:58,112 --> 01:17:00,046Are we counting?

185001:17:00,114 --> 01:17:01,342Maybe.

185101:17:03,351 --> 01:17:05,376Well, I'm taking Edith home.

185201:17:05,453 --> 01:17:06,351Sandy?

185301:17:07,688 --> 01:17:09,246I'm gonna stay.

185401:17:13,260 --> 01:17:15,990Are you sorry for someof those things you said?

185501:17:16,063 --> 01:17:18,554I'm sorry I said them.

185601:17:18,599 --> 01:17:19,998Well.

185701:17:20,067 --> 01:17:21,534Like a good Christian,

185801:17:21,569 --> 01:17:24,697I... oh, John.

185901:17:24,772 --> 01:17:26,569Oh! Well.

186001:17:27,708 --> 01:17:29,972You did a terrible thing,

186101:17:30,011 --> 01:17:32,377but we're all sothankful you're all right.

186201:17:32,480 --> 01:17:35,506Even Art. He just hates

things he can't understand.

1863



01:17:35,583 --> 01:17:37,278You're a sadist, John,

186401:17:37,385 --> 01:17:39,410But I admit I got a kick out of

186501:17:39,487 --> 01:17:41,216chasing my tail around your maypole...

186601:17:41,288 --> 01:17:43,415Even if that is all I caught.

186701:17:43,491 --> 01:17:44,583Good luck to you.

186801:17:44,625 --> 01:17:46,183Wish you the best. Thank you.

186901:17:46,227 --> 01:17:47,216Ready?

187001:17:56,303 --> 01:17:58,134Later on.Okay, good night.

187101:18:00,975 --> 01:18:01,839Mm-hmm.

187201:18:05,246 --> 01:18:06,440Mmm.

187301:18:06,547 --> 01:18:09,380I don't know, man.

187401:18:09,450 --> 01:18:11,418Something about this...

187501:18:11,452 --> 01:18:13,682something about you, John.

187601:18:13,754 --> 01:18:15,881The more I think about it,

1877

01:18:15,956 --> 01:18:18,789the more I'm no longerin that Chinese box.



187801:18:20,761 --> 01:18:22,558I sense... space.

187901:18:22,596 --> 01:18:27,499

A kinda latitude of whatwe happily call reality,

188001:18:27,568 --> 01:18:30,560in which, as everybody keeps saying...

188101:18:31,906 --> 01:18:33,601anything's possible.

1882

01:18:33,674 --> 01:18:35,539Yes. No, no. No, no.

188301:18:35,576 --> 01:18:37,373No. No more words.

188401:18:37,411 --> 01:18:39,106I'm gonna go home,

188501:18:39,180 --> 01:18:40,977

and I'm gonna watch Star Trek

188601:18:41,015 --> 01:18:43,074for a dose of sanity.

188701:18:43,117 --> 01:18:45,108Good luck to you, man,

188801:18:45,186 --> 01:18:47,586wherever this may lead you.

188901:18:47,621 --> 01:18:49,987You drop me a line sometime.

189001:18:50,024 --> 01:18:51,821Let me know how you're making out.

189101:18:53,427 --> 01:18:54,394I will.

189201:19:05,840 --> 01:19:08,673



So, John Oldman.

189301:19:08,743 --> 01:19:11,303What other pun names have you used?

1894

01:19:11,345 --> 01:19:12,642Lots.

189501:19:14,181 --> 01:19:17,241John Paley for John Paleolithic,

189601:19:17,284 --> 01:19:19,650John Savage...

1897

01:19:19,687 --> 01:19:21,780Got really crazy about 60 years ago,

189801:19:21,856 --> 01:19:23,653when I was teaching at Harvard,

189901:19:23,691 --> 01:19:26,455I was John Thomas Partee.

190001:19:26,560 --> 01:19:29,051

John T. Partee -Boston tea party.

190101:19:29,096 --> 01:19:30,256I get it.

190201:19:30,297 --> 01:19:31,491Yeah, I know.

190301:19:31,565 --> 01:19:32,691Wait, wait, wait.

190401:19:32,767 --> 01:19:35,065Boston?

190501:19:35,102 --> 01:19:37,19560 years ago?

190601:19:37,271 --> 01:19:39,364

J-John Partee?

1907



01:19:43,277 --> 01:19:47,805You did not teach chemistry!I do not believe you!

190801:19:49,083 --> 01:19:51,677Your mother's name was Nola.

190901:19:51,719 --> 01:19:52,913No. Yeah.

191001:19:52,987 --> 01:19:54,978No.

191101:19:55,022 --> 01:19:57,490Yes, Nola.

191201:19:57,525 --> 01:19:59,186My mother!

191301:20:00,528 --> 01:20:02,120I reject this!

191401:20:03,731 --> 01:20:05,722My-My-My dog's name.

191501:20:06,834 --> 01:20:08,734We had him before I was born.

191601:20:08,803 --> 01:20:09,735Woofie.

191701:20:09,804 --> 01:20:11,135Woof, woof, woofie...

191801:20:16,644 --> 01:20:18,578Gruber. She remarried?

191901:20:18,612 --> 01:20:20,546She said you abandoned us.

192001:20:21,615 --> 01:20:23,242Sorry, I had to move on.

1921

01:20:23,317 --> 01:20:25,046You know that. I left enough.



192201:20:25,119 --> 01:20:27,212- I left enough.- I'm cold.

192301:20:27,254 --> 01:20:29,347

Chilly Willy, always cold.

192401:20:29,423 --> 01:20:31,414Never could stand the cold.

192501:20:31,458 --> 01:20:35,155Wait, you... you had a beard.

192601:20:35,229 --> 01:20:36,821

Yeah, you used to tug on it

192701:20:36,864 --> 01:20:38,388to see if it was real.

192801:20:38,432 --> 01:20:39,956Agh! Will!

192901:20:40,034 --> 01:20:40,864God.

193001:20:42,336 --> 01:20:43,735911, now!

193101:20:45,739 --> 01:20:47,536Come on, Will.

193201:20:47,575 --> 01:20:48,667Will.

193301:20:48,742 --> 01:20:49,674Come on, buddy.

193401:21:21,842 --> 01:21:23,901You'll stay in touch, Dr. Oldman,

193501:21:23,944 --> 01:21:26,037in case there are any questions.

193601:21:26,113 --> 01:21:28,172I'll be back for the funeral.



193701:21:28,215 --> 01:21:29,204Miss.

193801:21:39,526 --> 01:21:41,653

You never saw a grown child die.

193901:21:43,130 --> 01:21:44,062No.

The.man.From.earth.2007.1080p.x264.YIFY

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