The Unwritten Rules of Persuasion - 60 Second Marketer [email protected] The...
Transcript of The Unwritten Rules of Persuasion - 60 Second Marketer [email protected] The...
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The Unwritten Rules of Persuasion
Jamie Turner Author | Speaker | CEO
The Science Behind Words and Actions that Engage and Influence Others
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Let’s Get to Know One Another
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I’ve written a few books
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I get on TV sometimes
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And I’ve helped a few clients you
may have heard of
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But the thing I love to do most is to help people like you
SELL MORE STUFF
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In-Depth Reading
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“The only form of ethical persuasion that exists is when the goals of the persuader are
aligned with the goals of the persuadee.”
— Tristan Harris, former design ethicist for Google
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Harvard Business Review rated the ability to communicate the most important fact in making an executive promotable — more important than ambition, education, hard work, and even technical skill.
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You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.
You can, however, make him thirsty.
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How Humans Behave• They FOCUS on a desired outcome.
• They assign MEANING to that outcome.
• They tie their EMOTIONS to the meaning.
• They make DECISIONS based on the emotions.
• They take ACTION based on their decisions.
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Sally: What brings you in today? Eric: Well, I think it’s time I get in shape. Sally: Yes, and you’ve come to the right place. Eric: Well … that’s what I’m trying to figure out. I’ve got some other options to look at still. Sally: But you’re here! Obviously, there’s a good reason for that. Eric: You’re the closest gym to my house. Sally: Yes, and we have five hundred other locations worldwide, too. Obviously, a gym membership doesn’t do you any good if you don’t ever go, right? Eric: Yeah, I’ve gone down that road before. (A negative thought. Time for a But eraser.) Sally: But somehow I get the feeling this time is totally different for you. Tell you what, let me give you a tour, and then we’ll come back here and I’ll show you some numbers.
Sally and Eric at the Health Club
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3 Steps to StartWhen possible, answer each of the following questions before you begin the conversation, a pitch, or a presentation:
• Step 1: What action do you want them to take?
• Step 2: How do they need to feel in order to take action?
• Step 3: What do they need to believe in order for them to feel that way?
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Finding the first “yes.”
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Use Tag Questions — which are written with question marks, but delivered as statements.
“Isn’t the weather great today?” “The Olympics has been fun to watch, right?” “Aren’t you glad it’s Friday?”
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Practice LY-ing
Start sentences with “obviously,” “clearly,” or “naturally.”
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Other Tips• Backtracking: Using what people have
said as a way to get a little yes. “You said you’ve gone down that path before?”
• Nodding: If you are nodding your own head while delivering a statement, the person you’re speaking to is much more likely to nod themselves.
• Barnum Statements: A generalization that is true for everyone. “At times, you are withdrawn and quiet, while at other times you are outgoing and personable.”
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Use the word “But” to erase previous statements.
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“But” at a Glance• A “but” erases what came before it and enhances what comes after it.
• This power is often accidentally misused, but when used intentionally, it can have a very positive impact on the outcome of communication.
• Intentional But Erasers can help to overcome a soft “no.”
• Combine “yes” and “but” during a dialogue to create a nearly hypnotic effect.
• “And” (which is the opposite of “but”) can be used to eliminate the But Effect as well as link an agreeable idea to a less agreeable idea — making the less agreeable idea more likely to be accepted.
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Using “But” Effectively• “I know you don’t like to wash the
dishes, but I also know that you like doing nice things for your mom when she’s stressed.”
• “I know it seems everyone is asking you for money this time of year, but I also know that you’re one of the most committed contributors to the organization.”
• “I know you’re busy, but you’ve got to see this.”
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“And” Linking• “And” links two ideas together as
one.
• Taking a positive, agreeable statement, and linking it to a less agreeable statement in order to minimize the impact of the less agreeable statement.
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Sally: What brings you in today? Eric: Well, I think it’s time I get in shape. Sally: Yes, and you’ve come to the right place. Eric: Well … that’s what I’m trying to figure out. I’ve got some other options to look at still. Sally: But you’re here! Obviously, there’s a good reason for that. Eric: You’re the closest gym to my house. Sally: Yes, and we have five hundred other locations worldwide, too. Obviously, a gym membership doesn’t do you any good if you don’t ever go, right? Eric: Yeah, I’ve gone down that road before. (A negative thought. Time for a But eraser.) Sally: But somehow I get the feeling this time is totally different for you. Tell you what, let me give you a tour, and then we’ll come back here and I’ll show you some numbers.
Sally and Eric at the Health Club
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The power of suggestion• Dentist: “I’m going to put your chair back,
but you may become so relaxed that you’ll want to fall asleep.”
• Financial Advisor: “I’m gong to lay out all your options, but you may want to take my advice on a specific option.”
• YouTube Sales: “I’m going to show you how this works, but you may find yourself pulling out your phone to place an order.”
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The power of the word “because.” When she said “May I
use the copier?” 60% said yes. When she
said “because I’m in a rush” 94% said yes.
Amazingly, when she just said “because”
93% still said yes.
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Using “Why” to allow people to fill in their own “because.”
Why do you think it’s important to attend executive development meetings?
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“Because” at a glance• “Because” is magical because it satisfies
the brain’s need for a link between cause and effect.
• “Because” doesn’t always need a logical or compelling reason behind it in order for it to be effective.
• Leaders — Make sure your team members understand the organization’s “because” in addition to their own “because.”
• Salespeople — People don’t buy what you do, they buy why you do it.
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What is one of the best ways to connect with someone?
Ask for help.
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Don’t underestimate the power of words like “let’s” and “we.”
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Persuasion via Q&A
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Persuasion via Q&A• Open questions encourage discussion (e.g.,
“What are you looking for in a car?”). Closed questions narrow the focus (e.g., “What do you like about this car?”).
• Permission questions open up a situation (e.g., “Do you mind if I ask about cars you already own?”).
• Magic wand questions explore what the person answering wants or desires (e.g., “If money were no object, what kind of car would you own?”).
• Catchall questions build bridges to the next phase of the process (e.g., “Do you mean something like this car?”).
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• Jamie is a fractional CMO for organizations that are trying to solve marketing problems.
• In that capacity, he works with businesses that need a seasoned executive, but that don’t need a full time CMO.
• He also speaks at events, trade shows, and conferences around the globe.
• You can reach Jamie at 678-313-3472 or at [email protected]
Let’s Open Up a Dialogue, Shall We?
Jamie Turner Author, Speaker, and
CEO of SIXTY and 60SecondMarketer.com