The story of the roller derby.

20
forget sk8ER boys.

Transcript of The story of the roller derby.

Page 1: The story of the roller derby.

forget sk8ER boys.

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they have good hair, but not much else.

(if you’re a sk8er boi, ignore that comment above. call me!)

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on the other hand, i went to my first roller derby

this weekend.and met some sk8er girls.

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and no, drew barrymore was not there.

(I know, I know, part of me thought she’d be there too.)

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fish net stockings. short skirts. skates. tattoos.

daaaaaaaamn gina!

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these girls weren’t nice.

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they were bad ass.

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remember what it was like when we were kids and

we hung out at the roller rink?

(side note: remember when roller rinks existed?!)

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ok, now add a few things to that image

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trash talk. shoving. beer. bruises.oh yeah, and the occasional broken face.

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and the names. oh the names.

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missile america. peter pansy. primp daddy.

sheeza brickhouse. carmen getsome.

hard cora.

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and then there was the re-animate’her.

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yes, she is for realz.be afraid.

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she was the most intimidating girl i’ve ever seen.

(well aside from that girl in the ring. but they kind of look alike, don’t you think?)

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i think maybe i’ll put on a few more coats of eyeliner

this week and see if I can imitate her cold stare.

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but i don’t think my mom would approve of tattoo sleeves.so alas, i’ll probably just look like a tired raccoon.

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I suppose most of us book nerds

don’t grow up to be roller derby girls.

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but thats okay.

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because we all secretly own

‘whip it‘ on dvd anyway.