The ROCK Players The ROCK Players presentpresent

“Having a “Having a Winner Pick Winner Pick

Us”Us”Based on Acts 10:34-43Based on Acts 10:34-43 ©2006 David Skarshaug (www.alcames.org). Conditions for use: (1) ©2006 David Skarshaug (www.alcames.org). Conditions for use: (1) If you use all or parts of this script in any form, please consider If you use all or parts of this script in any form, please consider sending a suggested $25 donation check made out to “The ROCK” sending a suggested $25 donation check made out to “The ROCK” to the following address: Ascension Lutheran Church, 615 Kellogg, to the following address: Ascension Lutheran Church, 615 Kellogg, Ames, IA 50010. Reference the script title in the memo on the Ames, IA 50010. Reference the script title in the memo on the check. (2) Do not sell any part of this script, even if you rewrite it. check. (2) Do not sell any part of this script, even if you rewrite it. (3) You may reproduce this script for internal use, but all copies (3) You may reproduce this script for internal use, but all copies must contain this copyright statement.must contain this copyright statement.

June Cleaver:June Cleaver: KelliKelliWally Cleaver:Wally Cleaver: AustinAustinBeaver Cleaver:Beaver Cleaver: MichaelMichaelEddie Haskell:Eddie Haskell: EricEricWard Cleaver:Ward Cleaver: MattiasMattias

Intro Music (“Right Field”):Intro Music (“Right Field”):Saturday summers when I was a kid,Saturday summers when I was a kid,We’d go to the school yard and here’s We’d go to the school yard and here’s

what we did,what we did,We’d pick out the captains; choose up We’d pick out the captains; choose up

the teams,the teams,It was always a measure of my self It was always a measure of my self

esteem,esteem,‘Cause the fastest, the strongest, ‘Cause the fastest, the strongest,

played short stop and first,played short stop and first,The last ones they picked were the The last ones they picked were the

worst...worst...I never needed to ask; it was sealed.I never needed to ask; it was sealed.I just took up my place in right field.I just took up my place in right field.

Beaver:Beaver: (Clearly depressed, Beaver (Clearly depressed, Beaver walks into living room where his walks into living room where his parents are sitting, Dad reading parents are sitting, Dad reading the newspaper & Mom dusting. the newspaper & Mom dusting. Beaver is dragging his bat behind Beaver is dragging his bat behind him with the glove on the bat. him with the glove on the bat. Beaver sits down and sighs. June & Beaver sits down and sighs. June & Ward ignore him, so he sighs Ward ignore him, so he sighs louder, etc. June & Ward exchange louder, etc. June & Ward exchange glances at each other. Finally, June glances at each other. Finally, June speaks up…)speaks up…)

June:June: All right, what’s the All right, what’s the matter, Beaver?matter, Beaver?

Beaver:Beaver: Oh, nothing…Oh, nothing…

June:June: Beaver, you never Beaver, you never just come and sit down just come and sit down with us. And you’ve been with us. And you’ve been moping around ever moping around ever since you came in the since you came in the house.house.

Beaver:Beaver: Well, gee, Mom. Well, gee, Mom. Can’t a kid just enjoy a Can’t a kid just enjoy a good mope without his good mope without his parents thinkin’ he’s parents thinkin’ he’s gonna’ croak or gonna’ croak or something?something?

Ward:Ward: Come on, Come on, Beaver, you know your Beaver, you know your mother and I are always mother and I are always here whenever you have here whenever you have a problem. Now what’s a problem. Now what’s the matter?the matter?

Beaver:Beaver: Oh, YOU Oh, YOU wouldn’t understand.wouldn’t understand.

June:June: Beaver! How can Beaver! How can you say a thing like that?you say a thing like that?

Beaver:Beaver: Oh, that’s easy, Oh, that’s easy, Mom. On account of I’m Mom. On account of I’m just a kid and you’re just a kid and you’re adults, and on account of adults, and on account of adults never understand adults never understand what it’s like being a what it’s like being a dumb ol’ kid. dumb ol’ kid.

Ward:Ward: Beaver, this may Beaver, this may come as a surprise to come as a surprise to you, but once even your you, but once even your mother and I were just a mother and I were just a couple of dumb ‘ol kids couple of dumb ‘ol kids too.too.

June:June: Speak for yourself, Speak for yourself, Ward. I was class Ward. I was class valedictorian.valedictorian.

Ward:Ward: In a class of In a class of thirty. thirty.

June:June: Thirty-two. Well, Thirty-two. Well, actually Helen Frump and actually Helen Frump and I were both class I were both class valedictorians.valedictorians.

Ward:Ward: Helen Frump? Helen Frump? Hmm, I wonder what Hmm, I wonder what ever happened to her? ever happened to her? You know the boys all You know the boys all said she could eat an said she could eat an apple through a picket apple through a picket fence. fence. (Chuckles.)(Chuckles.) Yeah, Yeah, ol’ Helen had quite an ol’ Helen had quite an overbite.overbite.

June:June: Ward! Stop that. Ward! Stop that. Helen was a wonderful Helen was a wonderful person. If not for the person. If not for the slight stuttering problem slight stuttering problem she had, I’m sure they’d she had, I’m sure they’d have chosen her over me have chosen her over me for the commencement for the commencement speech.speech.

Ward:Ward: Well, stuttering Well, stuttering or not, I know that to at or not, I know that to at least the male half of the least the male half of the class, you looked a whole class, you looked a whole lot better in a cap and lot better in a cap and gown than poor ol’ gown than poor ol’ Helen.Helen.

Beaver:Beaver: That’s just it. That’s just it.

Ward:Ward: Don’t you worry Don’t you worry about it, Beaver. We have about it, Beaver. We have braces for your teeth.braces for your teeth.

Beaver:Beaver: No, not the No, not the teeth!teeth!

June:June: Beaver, you don’t Beaver, you don’t have a speech problem, have a speech problem, do you? Ward, should we do you? Ward, should we call the school?call the school?

Beaver:Beaver: No. It’s not that. No. It’s not that. You see, YOU were chosen. You see, YOU were chosen. I’m NEVER chosen for I’m NEVER chosen for ANYTHING. Just this ANYTHING. Just this morning, we were choosing morning, we were choosing up teams for a ball game up teams for a ball game and I was the last one and I was the last one picked! Even Larry picked! Even Larry Mondello and ol’ Judy were Mondello and ol’ Judy were selected before me.selected before me.

Ward:Ward: Oh, I see. Well Oh, I see. Well don’t be ridiculous, don’t be ridiculous, Beaver. Why remember Beaver. Why remember the time you were the time you were selected to represent selected to represent your cub scout den in the your cub scout den in the district marble shooting district marble shooting contest?contest?

Beaver:Beaver: Dad, that was Dad, that was Wally. Wally.

Ward:Ward: Oh…yes…that’s Oh…yes…that’s right…so it was. right…so it was.

Beaver:Beaver: Don’t you Don’t you remember when I remember when I competed with the den? I competed with the den? I was washing off my was washing off my shooter when Gilbert shooter when Gilbert yelled at me and I yelled at me and I accidentally swallowed it.accidentally swallowed it.

June:June: Ward, how could you Ward, how could you forget that? I’ve never seen forget that? I’ve never seen Dr. Albright look so Dr. Albright look so concerned.concerned.

Ward:Ward: Well, there was the Well, there was the pinewood…hmm, no, come pinewood…hmm, no, come to think of it, that was to think of it, that was Wally too. Well, anyway…Wally too. Well, anyway…

Beaver:Beaver: Never mind I’m Never mind I’m going to my room. going to my room. (Tromps off up the (Tromps off up the steps.)steps.)

June:June: Ward, what are we Ward, what are we going to do? I’ve never going to do? I’ve never seen the Beaver look so seen the Beaver look so sad.sad.

Ward:Ward: June, he’s a boy. June, he’s a boy. He’ll get over it. He’ll get over it.

June:June: Well, maybe the Well, maybe the compassionate words of compassionate words of his older brother will his older brother will cheer him up. cheer him up. (Ward (Ward looks at her in disbelief.)looks at her in disbelief.)

Wally:Wally: (Play music. (Play music. Wally is in his room Wally is in his room polishing trophy. Beaver polishing trophy. Beaver enters room, plops down enters room, plops down on bed, and starts on bed, and starts sighing.)sighing.) Hey, Beave, why Hey, Beave, why you back so early from you back so early from the school yard? Judy the school yard? Judy beat you up again?beat you up again?

Beaver:Beaver: Very funny. Very funny. Besides, she beat up Besides, she beat up Whitey this time.Whitey this time.

Wally:Wally: So why are you So why are you mopin’ around?mopin’ around?

Beaver:Beaver: What are you What are you talkin’ about?talkin’ about?

Wally:Wally: Beave, I’m your Beave, I’m your brother. You might be able brother. You might be able to sneak around Mom and to sneak around Mom and Dad, but I have to share a Dad, but I have to share a room with you. I haven’t room with you. I haven’t seen you look this sad since seen you look this sad since the time Mom made you the time Mom made you take a bath twice in the take a bath twice in the same week.same week.

Beaver:Beaver: Wally, when you Wally, when you were little, were you ever were little, were you ever picked last?picked last?

Wally:Wally: Oh, that’s what this is Oh, that’s what this is all about? Beave, it doesn’t all about? Beave, it doesn’t matter when you get pickedmatter when you get picked—just be glad you’re in the —just be glad you’re in the game. Did your team win?game. Did your team win?

Beaver:Beaver: Well, yeah, I Well, yeah, I guess so. But all I did guess so. But all I did was strike out twice, got was strike out twice, got hit by the ball once, and hit by the ball once, and drop two balls in right drop two balls in right field.field.

Wally:Wally: Hey, you’re Hey, you’re improving. At least you improving. At least you got on base this time. got on base this time. But remember, Beave, a But remember, Beave, a lot of things in life are lot of things in life are like a team sport. It’s like a team sport. It’s not about you. Just be not about you. Just be happy you were picked happy you were picked by the winning team. by the winning team.

Beaver:Beaver: What do you What do you mean, Wally?mean, Wally?

Wally:Wally: I was just reading this I was just reading this in my devotions this in my devotions this morning. Here, read it morning. Here, read it yourself yourself (hands Beaver (hands Beaver open Bible)open Bible). Acts 10:34-43. . Acts 10:34-43. Read it, Beave.Read it, Beave.

Beaver:Beaver: (Reading.) (Reading.) Then Then Peter began to speak: “I Peter began to speak: “I now realize how true it is now realize how true it is that God does not show that God does not show favoritism but accepts favoritism but accepts men from every nation men from every nation who fear him and do who fear him and do what is right. (what is right. (Cont’dCont’d) )

Beaver: (Beaver: (Cont’dCont’d) You ) You know the message God know the message God sent to the people of sent to the people of Israel, telling the good Israel, telling the good news of peace through news of peace through Jesus Christ, who is Lord Jesus Christ, who is Lord of all. (of all. (Cont’dCont’d) )

Beaver: (Beaver: (Cont’dCont’d) You ) You know what has happened know what has happened throughout Judea, throughout Judea, beginning in Galilee after beginning in Galilee after the baptism that John the baptism that John preached — how God preached — how God anointed Jesus of anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Nazareth with the Holy Spirit & power, (Spirit & power, (Cont’dCont’d))

Beaver: (Beaver: (Cont’dCont’d) and how ) and how he went around doing good he went around doing good and healing all who were and healing all who were under the power of the under the power of the devil, because God was with devil, because God was with him. “We are witnesses of him. “We are witnesses of everything he did in the everything he did in the country of the Jews and in country of the Jews and in Jerusalem. (Jerusalem. (Cont’dCont’d))

Beaver: (Beaver: (Cont’dCont’d) They ) They killed him by hanging killed him by hanging him on a tree, but God him on a tree, but God raised him from the dead raised him from the dead on the third day and on the third day and caused him to be seen. caused him to be seen. ((Cont’dCont’d) )

Beaver: (Beaver: (Cont’dCont’d) He was ) He was not seen by all the not seen by all the people, but by witnesses people, but by witnesses whom God had already whom God had already chosen — by us who ate chosen — by us who ate and drank with him after and drank with him after he rose from the dead. he rose from the dead. ((Cont’dCont’d) )

Beaver: (Beaver: (Cont’dCont’d) He ) He commanded us to preach commanded us to preach to the people and to to the people and to testify that he is the one testify that he is the one whom God appointed as whom God appointed as judge of the living and judge of the living and the dead. (the dead. (Cont’dCont’d) )

Beaver: (Beaver: (Cont’dCont’d) All the ) All the prophets testify about prophets testify about him that everyone who him that everyone who believes in him receives believes in him receives forgiveness of sins forgiveness of sins through his name.”through his name.”

Wally:Wally: There, don’t you There, don’t you see?see?

Beaver:Beaver: See what, Wally?See what, Wally?

Wally:Wally: If we have accepted If we have accepted Jesus as our savior, that Jesus as our savior, that means we were picked by means we were picked by the winning team. Think the winning team. Think about it, Beave. It says God about it, Beave. It says God “accepts men from every “accepts men from every nation who fear him and do nation who fear him and do what is right”. It’s just like what is right”. It’s just like being picked for a ball being picked for a ball team. team.

Beaver:Beaver: Oh, I see. And all Oh, I see. And all we have to do is say we have to do is say “Yeah, I’ll play,” and we “Yeah, I’ll play,” and we get all the benefits of get all the benefits of being on the winning being on the winning team even if we aren’t team even if we aren’t the best player.the best player.

Wally:Wally: Shucks, Beave, it Shucks, Beave, it seems to say that God even seems to say that God even goes out of his way to pick goes out of his way to pick people that aren’t the best people that aren’t the best players or most obvious players or most obvious picks. It says Jesus “went picks. It says Jesus “went around doing good and around doing good and healing all who were under healing all who were under the power of the devil.” the power of the devil.” ((Cont’dCont’d))

Wally: (Wally: (Cont’dCont’d) He ) He chooses people that are chooses people that are dead and lost in their dead and lost in their sins. Even real creeps sins. Even real creeps like the apostle Paul, like the apostle Paul, who said he was the who said he was the chief among sinners.chief among sinners.

Beaver:Beaver: You mean he You mean he chooses bad players, chooses bad players, even creepy little kids even creepy little kids like me?like me?

Wally:Wally: Yeah, even kids Yeah, even kids like you, Beave. Look, it like you, Beave. Look, it says “He was not seen says “He was not seen by all the people, but by by all the people, but by witnesses whom God had witnesses whom God had already chosen.” already chosen.”

Beaver:Beaver: So if we have So if we have accepted Christ as our accepted Christ as our savior, it means we were savior, it means we were chosen by the ultimate chosen by the ultimate winner to be on His winner to be on His team.team.

Wally:Wally: Yeah, something Yeah, something like that, Beave. But you like that, Beave. But you can’t just walk away can’t just walk away when you’re picked. You when you’re picked. You have to agree to be on have to agree to be on the team. (the team. (Cont’dCont’d) )

Wally: (Wally: (Cont’dCont’d) And ) And you’ve been there you’ve been there before, Beave. When before, Beave. When you know a great captain you know a great captain has picked you, what kid has picked you, what kid in his right mind in his right mind wouldn’t play?wouldn’t play?

Beaver:Beaver: Wow, Wally, does Wow, Wally, does that mean us Christians that mean us Christians don’t have any excuse for don’t have any excuse for moping around or moping around or complaining about what our complaining about what our position is on the team, or position is on the team, or feeling bad when things feeling bad when things don’t go our way. don’t go our way.

Wally:Wally: Beave, if we act Beave, if we act that way, we deserve to that way, we deserve to be clobbered. be clobbered. (Knock at (Knock at door.)door.)

Wally:Wally: Yeah, who is it?Yeah, who is it?

Eddie:Eddie: (Door opens.) (Door opens.) Hey, Sam. What kind of Hey, Sam. What kind of executive board meeting executive board meeting you guys holding in here, you guys holding in here, anyway?anyway?

Beaver:Beaver: Oh, hi Eddie. Oh, hi Eddie.

Eddie:Eddie: Hey, squirt. Hey, squirt. What’s eatin’ you? Judy What’s eatin’ you? Judy beat you up again?beat you up again?

Wally:Wally: Hey, lay off him, Hey, lay off him, Eddie. What do you want Eddie. What do you want anyway?anyway?

Eddie:Eddie: Wally, you’re Wally, you’re not gonna believe this, not gonna believe this, but the craziest thing but the craziest thing just happened. My ol’ just happened. My ol’ man calls me into his man calls me into his study, and just when I study, and just when I think he’s gonna’ smack think he’s gonna’ smack me, (me, (Cont’dCont’d) )

Eddie: (Eddie: (Cont’dCont’d) he says ) he says the daughter of one of the daughter of one of his old high school his old high school sweethearts is back in sweethearts is back in town and in need an town and in need an escort to a reunion party.escort to a reunion party.

Wally:Wally: Cool, Eddie. Cool, Eddie. What’s she like?What’s she like?

Eddie:Eddie:Oh, I’ve never met Oh, I’ve never met her, but she’s rich. Her her, but she’s rich. Her mother made a fortune mother made a fortune developing some kind of developing some kind of new jaw brace, so I figure new jaw brace, so I figure this gal must be a regular this gal must be a regular movie star. Imagine, out of movie star. Imagine, out of all the guys in town, I was all the guys in town, I was chosen?chosen?

Wally:Wally: Gee, that’s cool, Gee, that’s cool, Eddie. What’s her name?Eddie. What’s her name?

Eddie:Eddie: I can’t I can’t remember, but my Pop remember, but my Pop say’s her mother was say’s her mother was class valedictorian or class valedictorian or something. something.

WallyWally:: Cool, Eddie. It’s Cool, Eddie. It’s good to be picked by a good to be picked by a winner, huh Beave? winner, huh Beave? (Leave it to Beaver (Leave it to Beaver music.)music.)