AN INDIVIDUAL’S DIGEST OF

JOHN ORTBERG’S

THE

LIFE YOU’VE ALWAYS

WANTED

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Preface

This booklet is my personal summary and digest of the wonderful andinspiring book, The Life You’ve Always Wanted by John Ortberg.

For personal spiritual development, it was decided to summarise thebook in my own words in order to reflect and deepen on the writings.

It must be clearly understood that this booklet is a personalundertaking and has in no wise been authorised by JohnOrtberg to interpret or elucidate.

It is the sincere hope that this digest will be enough to entice thereader to purchase and read the actual original book which will in nodoubt leave a lasting memory.

anousha vahdaty

ISBN 0-310-25074-9

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1. We Shall Morph Indeed: The hope of transformation▶ “I cannot pray for a very long without my mind

drifting into a fantasy of angry revenge over somepast slight I thought I had long forgiven or somegrandiose fantasy of achievement.”

▶ Where does disappointment come from? A commonanswer in our day is that it is a lack of self-esteem, afailure to accept oneself. But the ultimate answer is –my failure to be the person God had in mind when Hecreated me.

▶ I am called to become the person God hand in mindwhen he originally designed me.

▶ The possibility of transformation is the essence ofhope.

▶ The single belief most toxic to a relationship is thebelief that the other person cannot change.

2. Surprised by Change: The goal of spiritual life▶ Jesus said, “Love God, love people.”▶ John said, “Everyone who loves is born of God and

knows God. Whoever does not love does not knowGod, for God is love.”

▶ Sheldon Vanauken wrote that the strongest argumentfor Christianity is Christians, when they are drawinglife from God. The strongest argument againstChristianity? Also Christians, when they becomeexclusive, self-righteous, and complacent.

▶ To avid pseudo-transformation there are some signs:1. Am I spiritually inauthentic? A

preoccupation with appearing to be spiritual.2. Am I becoming judgmental or exclusive or

proud? When we pursue virtue, we begin towonder why others aren’t as virtuous as weare. Try not to rate people when you meetthem as if they were Olympic contestants. Forexample, when meeting people don’t

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categorise them into “This one is needy anddependent – stay away. That one is bright andhas much to offer – try to connect.” Why dowe often compare ourselves with others as ifwe are in some kind of competition? God isalways at work in us, many of his work isformed, grows, and is accomplished secretly insouls without their knowledge.

3. Am I becoming more approachable, orless? It is important to become approach andnot distant yourself from others.

4. Am I growing weary of pursuing spiritualgrowth? The pursuit of righteousness isalways an exhausting pursuit when it seeks adistorted goal.

5. Am I measuring my spiritual life insuperficial ways? Do you measure yourspiritual progress by the number of times youprayer and Bible study? Yet, the true way togrow spiritually is by asking “Am I growing inlove for God and people?” This issue is whatkind of people are we becoming?

3. Training vs Trying: The truth about spiritualdisciplines▶ There is an immense difference between training to

do something and trying to do something.▶ Respecting the distinction between training and

merely trying is the key to transformation in everyaspect of life.

▶ What are spiritual disciplines?▶ Spiritual disciplines are not a barometer of

spirituality. God does not measure people’s spiritualperformance on the basis of certain disciplines.

▶ The true indicator of spiritual wellbeing is the abilityto love God and people. If we can do this without the

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practice of any particular spiritual disciplines, then weshould by all means skip the.

▶ Spiritual disciplines are not necessarilyunpleasant. Many people get the impressionsomewhere that for an activity to count as a spiritualdiscipline, it must be something we would rather notdo.

▶ Spiritual disciplines are not a way to earn favourwith God. Spiritual disciplines are not ways to getextra credit or to demonstrate to God how deeply weare committed to Him. The are for our benefit totransform and not for God’s.

▶ What makes something a discipline? Discipline:Any activity I can do by direct effort that will help medo what I cannot now do by direct effort.

▶ Humility and patience are not disciplines but objectsor results of the disciplines.

▶ Disciplines are valuable simply because they allow usto do what we cannot do by willpower alone.

▶ What makes something a spiritual discipline?Spiritual discipline: Any activity that can help me gainpower to live life as Jesus taught and modelled it.

▶ Certain practices are basic such as solitude,servanthood, confession or meditation on Scripture.But we can turn almost any activity into a trainingexercise for spiritual life.

▶ How do we know what spiritual disciplines topractice? First, we must understand what it means tolive in the kingdom of God. Second, we mustunderstand what kind of barriers keep us from doingso. Third, we must discover what experiences orrelationships can help us overcome these barriers.

▶ What is a disciplined person? A disciplined personis someone who can do the right thing at the righttime in the right way with the right spirit.

▶ A disciplined person is not simply someone whoexercises many disciplines. A disciplined person is not

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a highly systematic, rigidly scheduled, chart-making,gold-start-loving early riser.

▶ Disciplined people can do what is called for at anygiven moment.

▶ A disciplined follower of Jesus is someone whodiscerns when laughter, gentleness, silence, hearingwords, or prophetic indignation is called for, andoffers it promptly, effectively and lovingly.

Signs of Wise Spiritual Training▶ Wise training respects the freedom of the Spirit.

Spiritual transformation is the work of God. We maybe aggressively pursuing it, but we cannot turn it onand off. We can open ourselves to transformationthrough certain practices, but we cannot engineer it.We can take no credit for it.

▶ Our primary task is not to calculate how many versesof Scripture we read or how many minutes we spendin prayer. Our task is to use these activities to createopportunities for God t work. Then what happens isup to Him.

▶ Wise training respects our unique temperamentand gifts. Whatever your natural temperament maybe, it is not a barrier to your spiritual growth.

▶ Are you spontaneous or a well-organised-plan-aheadtype of person? Either way it doesn’t matter. We needto discover how God wants us to grow, for His designwill not look quite the same for everyone.

▶ Wise training will take into account our seasonof life. Our season of life, whatever it is, is not barrierto having Christ formed in us. Not in the least. Forexample, if you become a parent and yourcircumstances change, your spiritual growth practiceswill change with that also.

▶ Whatever our season of life, if offers its ownopportunities and challenges for spiritual growth.Instead of wishing we were in another season, we

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ought to find out what this one offers. Life counts – allof it, every moment.

▶ Wise training respects the inevitability of peaksand troughs. There will be times of consolation andtimes of desolation. Times when we are really close toGod and times when we are not.

▶ We assume that whatever phase is current will lastforever. In time of consolation we think that we havespiritual life mastered. In times of desolation weassume we have done something wrong and perhapsGod is punishing us. In truth both seasons arevaluable and have their purpose.

▶ Wise training begins with a clear decision. Youhave to decide whether or not you want to commit tospiritual growth and training.

▶ Final preparations. There are two types of sins: sinsof omission and sins of commission. Sins of omissioninvolve not doing things we ought to do; sins ofcommission consists of things we do that we ought toavoid.

▶ Similarly spiritual disciplines can be placed in twocategories – disciplines of engagement and disciplinesof abstinence. Disciplines of engagement involveintentionally doing certain things. Worship, study,fellowship and giving are all examples of engagement.By contrast, disciplines of abstinence involveintentionally refraining from doing things such asfasting, solitude and silence.

▶ Here’s the connection: If you struggle with a sin ofcommission, then you will be helped by practicing adiscipline of abstinence. So if you have a problem withboasting (commission), then silence or secrecy(abstinence) will help.

▶ If you struggle with the sin of omission, then you willbe helped by a discipline of engagement. For instance,if you struggle with joylessness, the you will want toimmerse yourself in discipline of celebration.

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4. A “Dee Dah Day”: The practice of celebration▶ Most people divide the time into to two categories:

living and waiting to live.▶ Most of our life is in transit: trying to get somewhere,

waiting to begin, driving someplace, standing in line,waiting for a meeting to end, trying to get a taskcompleted, worrying about something bad that mighthappen, or being angry about something that didhappen. These are moments when we are not in thepresent – thus not being aware of the voice andpurpose of God.

▶ Ironically, the thing that keeps us from experiencingjoy is our preoccupation with self.

▶ Joy is at the heart of God’s plan for human beings.▶ We are invited to rejoice in every moment of life

because every moment of life is a gift.▶ Joy is strength. Its absence will create weakness.▶ Joyfulness is a learned skill. You must take

responsibility for your joy.▶ People who want to pursue joy especially nee to

practice the discipline of celebration.▶ Celebration generally involves activities that bring

pleasure, gathering with people we love.▶ True celebration is the inverse of hedonism. Hedonism

is the demand for more and more pleasure forpersonal gratification. It always follows the law ofdiminishing returns, so that what produced joy inus yesterday no longer dose today. Thus, our capacityfor joy diminishes.

▶ We all live with the illusion that joy will comesomeday when conditions change. If we are going toknow joy, it must be in this day – today.

▶ True joy, comes only to those who have devoted theirlives to something greater than personal happiness.

▶ One test of authentic joy is its compatibility with pain.▶ Surround yourself with joy-carriers. Similarly distant

yourself from joy-vampires.

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▶ Dedicate one day a week to acts of celebration: eastfoods you lover to eat, listen to music that movesyour soul, play a sport, read a book, wear clothes thatmake you happy – and as you do this thank God forit.

▶ Devote your time to more meaningful endeavoursrather than watching TV: Get more sleep, readsomething, or have a really good conversation.

5. An Unhurried Life: The practice of slowing▶ To be spiritually healthy, we must ruthlessly

eliminate hurry from your lives.▶ Hurry is the great enemy of spiritual life in our day.

Hurry can destroy our souls. Hurry can keep us fromliving well. As Carl Jung wrote, “Hurry is not of thedevil; hurry is the devil.”

▶ By hurrying we will just kill our lives, instead of livingit.

▶ Symptoms of hurry sickness are:▶ Constantly speeding up daily activities. We will

read faster, talk faster, nod faster and eat faster.▶ Multiple-tasking. Hurry-sick people may drive, eat,

drink, monitor the radio, talk on the car phone, andmake gestures – all at the same time!

▶ Clutter. The lives of the hurry-sick lack simplicity.They acquire stacks of books and magazines and feelguilty for not reading them. We clutter our lives withtasks and things to do.

▶ Superficiality. “Superficiality is the curse of yourage.” Depth always comes slowly. Perhaps one reasonthat Abraham Lincoln achieved the depth of thoughthe did is that he grew up with so little to read. He hadto understand everything, even to the smallest detail.

▶ An inability to love. Love and hurry areincompatible. Love always takes time, and time is onething hurried people don’t have.

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▶ Sunset fatigue. When we come home at the end of aday’s work, those who need our live the most, thoseto whom we are most committed, end up getting theleftovers. Sunset fatigue is when we are just too tired,or too drained, or too preoccupied to lover the peopleto whom we have made the deepest promises. Sunsetfatigue has sent it when:

1. you find yourself rushing even when there’s noreason to

2. there is an underlying tension that causessharp words or quarrels

3. you sense a loss of gratitude and wonder4. you indulge in self-destructive escapes from

fatigue: abusing alcohol, watching too muchTV, or eating too much.

▶ Because it kills – love – that hurry is the great enemyof spiritual life.

Curing the hurry sickness▶ Slowing. Cultivate patience by deliberately choosing

to slow down and put ourselves in positions where wesimply have to wait. For example, drive in the slowlane. East food slowly: force yourself to chew at leastfifteen times before each swallow.

▶ The need for solitude. Solitude is the one placewhere we can gain freedom from the forces of societythat will otherwise relentlessly mould us.

▶ Put a frog in a pot of boiling water, it will immediatelyhop out. But put the frog in water and heat it slowly,and the creature will stay there until it boils to death.Put him in a lethal environment suddenly, and he willescape. But introduce the danger gradually and hewill never notice.

▶ Solitude means to refrain from society: we withdrawfrom conversation, from the presence of others, fromnoise, from the constant barrage of stimulation.

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▶ We need brief periods of solitude on a regular basis,ideally each day, and extended periods – half a day, aday, or even a few days.

▶ At the end of the day, review the day with God: to goover the events that took place, to see what He mightwan to say to us through them, nad to hand anyanxieties or regrets over to Him. A great benefit ofthis exercise is that we begin to learn from our days.

▶ Reviewing the day: be still and quite; acknowledgethat God is present; go back though your day fromthe morning as if on video; continue through the dayfrom scene to scene, as you do you will feel gratitudeor regret; end with a prayer of thanksgiving to God’smercy and love.

▶ Extended solitude can be affected by the mindwandering. When you pray you may find yourselfimmersed in an anger fantasy. In this fantasysomeone who hand hurt you was being deeplywounded by the wrong they had done to you. Anothertime, you may find yourself the object of a successfantasy so grandiose that it would make Narcissusblush with modesty.

▶ The answer is to improve a little bit each day. BrotherLawrence said, “For many years I was bothered bythe thought that I was a failure at prayer. Then oneday I realized I would always be a failure at prayer;and I’ve gotten along much better every since.”

6. Interrupting Heaven: The practice of prayer▶ Desperate people pray. They pray without thinking

about it; they pray even if they are not sure whothey’re praying to or if anyone out there is listening atall.

▶ It’s not bad to pray in a time of crisis. One of God’smost amazing attributes is that He is humble enoughto accept people when they turn to Him in sheer

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desperation, even when they have been ignoring Himfor years.

▶ Desperation prayers have been the beginning ofspiritual life for many people.

▶ Many people believe that their prayers won’t changeGod’s actions, so they ask themselves what the pointis of praying.

▶ All prayers rise before God. They are heard. Theymatter.

▶ The Bible’s teaching on prayer leads overwhelminglyto one conclusion: Prayer changes things.

▶ It pays to haggle with God. Prayer is impertinent,persistent, shameless, and inappropriate.

▶ Prayer is a learned behaviour. Nobody is born anexpert at it. No one ever masters prayer.

▶ To pray we need two things: time and a place.▶ Set aside five minutes, at the same time every day to

pray and stick to it no matter what.▶ Find the right setting to pray. Sometimes go outside

to a lake or to the ocean. Sometimes light a candle.▶ Prayer requires certain level of preparation.▶ Take a few deep breaths and allow your mind to slow

down. Perhaps focus on a physical object. You maywant to whisper Yá Bahá’u’l-Abhá a few times.

▶ Pray for what is really on your heart, not what you’dwish to be on your heart.

▶ Nothing kills prayer faster than when I pretend inprayer to be more noble than I really am.

Learning to be present▶ People’s mind wander when they prayer: Spiritual

Attention Deficit Disorder. People feel guilty aboutthis. It feels like a kind of failure. And of course, itdoes indicate a need to pause and refocus attention.

▶ Sometimes it may mean that if your mind keepsreturning to a particular topic curing prayer, it isprobably an indication that this is the topic that is of

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most concern to you and you need to talk to Godabout.

▶ Other times you many find yourself in an angerfantasy involving someone. Instead talk the personand tell him how you feel. This may also mean thatyou might have issues around resentment andforgiveness – so stop and talk with God about youranger.

▶ While praying you many have a fantasy aboutachieving some grandiose accomplishment and atthose times you need to talk to God about your needto feel important and inappropriate ways you feedthat need.

▶ It may be far better to think of these wanderingthoughts as stepping stones to prayer rather than asbarriers.

▶ To be fully present, you have to become aware of andspeak with God about what is actually happeningwithin you during prayer. So be aware of and reflecton what is actually happening to you when you prayand make yourself aware of God’s presence.

▶ Prayer, perhaps more than any other activity, is theconcrete expression of the fact that we are invitedinto a relationship with God. Prayer is talking withGod about what you we are doing together.

7. Appropriate Smallness – the practice ofservanthood▶ Some of the oldest sins are: Vanity, stubbornness and

pride.▶ Pride destroys our capacity to love. It moves us to

judge rather than to serve. Pride means not only thatwe want to be smart and wealthy, but also that wewill not be satisfied until we are smarter and wealthierthan those around us.

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The confusing thing called humility▶ All who humble themselves will be exalted.▶ Humility is not about beating ourselves up or trying to

make ourselves nothing.▶ Humility has to do with submitted willingness. It

involves a healthy self-forgetfulness. We will know wehave begun to make progress in humility when wefind that we get so enabled by the Holy Spirit to livein the moment that we cease to be preoccupied withourselves, one way of the other. When we are withothers, we are truly with them, not wondering howthey can be of benefit to us.

▶ “Once in a while I go on a diet. At those times, if I amin a restaurant, watching people eat, I find certainthoughts involuntarily running through my mind. Howcan people east this stuff? How can they treat theirbodies this way? Don’t they now this junk is lethal?Have they no discipline, no self-restraint?”

▶ Here’s the problem: When you try to do somethinggood, you are intensely aware of it. And you tend tobe aware of other people who aren’t putting forth thesame effort. Then you tend to start comparing youreffort. The result is pride, comparison, judgmental,and lack of love.

Servanthood▶ A good reason for servanthood is that even though we

are imperfect, in helping others, we receive strength.▶ Servanthood is giving yourself to those who can bring

you no status or clout.▶ Servanthood is not being exempt from mundane

work. Nobody is too good to perform the lowliest task.▶ Stop sizing up people from your first meeting, for

example, when in a group: Here is a troubled,whining, recovery junkie type. Here is a traditional,hyper-rational, old-school character who will notdiscover or reveal his heart. Here is a wise, high-

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functioning person from whom I can learn… ready tolisten to and try to connect with those who seemedadvanced and to endure those who seemed to lagbehind. The aim is to – let go of evaluations and allowGod to speak. Look for what God is trying to say toyou through people.

▶ The ministry of bearing with another is more thansimply tolerating difficult people. It is also learning tohear God speak through them. It is learning to bethere for them. It is learning that the difficult person Ihave most to deal with is in fact me.

▶ “Bearing with people” doesn’t require becoming bestfriends, but means learning to wish them well,releasing our right to hurt them back.

8. Life Beyond Regret: The practice of confession▶ Six-step process to confession:

1. Preparation. Place yourself into the care ofGod and ask for help. If left to ourselves, weare prone to self-condemnation for thingsabout which we should not feel guilty;alternatively, prone to glossing over the trulyugly stains that demand attention.

2. Self-examination. This entails taking time toreflect on our thoughts, words, and deeds andacknowledging that we have sinned. One wayto approach self-examination is to thinkthrough various categories of sin: pride, anger,lust, envy, greed, gluttony and sloth. Whenconfessing be specific, for example, I lied tomy boss for not going to work, rather than “Ihaven’t be truthful enough”. To confess meansto own up to the fact that our behaviour wasn’tjust the result of bad parenting, poor genes,jealous siblings, or a chemical imbalance. Butconfession means saying that somewhere in

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the mix was a choice, the choice was made byus, and that choice needs to be forgiven.

3. Perception. We all have a capacity for self-deception that works within us. We can lie toavoid pain and hardly be aware we have doneso. We can flatter or seek to manipulatealmost without even being aware of it. So inthis step we ask for honest perception.

4. Why and what happened? Two questions toask will help to gain a new perception, the firstis, “Why did I do what I did?” We may feel thereason why we gossiped about someone is thatwe were feeling insignificant, jealous or hard-done-by. Sin is often the attempt to meet alegitimate need in an illegitimate way. Nextquestion is, “What happened as a result of mysin?” Evaluate the consequences of that sinwhich requires patience and quiet spirit.

5. A new feeling. After understanding comes anew way of feeling. We sometimes experiencea stab of pain that call us to think again aboutour actions. It is the still small voice thatnudges us and says, “You have spoken bitterwords that have hurt someone. You need toput it right.”

6. A new promise. But confession is not justnaming what we have done in the past. Itinvolves our intentions about the future aswell. It requires a promise to and a covenantwith God not to commit that sin again.

7. The summit: healing grace. The final step is– grace. This is not just the idea of grace, butgrace as a reality, being immersed in it, givenlife by it.

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9. The Guided Life: Receiving guidance form the HolySpirit▶ It is one thing to speak to God. It is another thing to

listen. When we listen to God, we receive guidanceform the Holy Spirit.

▶ In order to listen to God’s promptings we need to be –fully present, not on autopilot.

▶ When you have a problem don’t dwell on it or worryabout it – pray on it.

▶ God can directly guide our thoughts without the aid ofintervening sounds or images.

▶ A key test to know whether we really want God’sguidance is to ask, “How often do I seek God’sguidance when I’m not facing trouble or a difficultdecision?”

▶ A helpful way to learn to see guidance is at first toavoid seeking guidance for external decisions liketaking a job or who to marry. Start by seekingguidance for the growth of your soul. The questions toask are:

1. How do I become a more truthful person?2. Whom do I know who can reach me to pray in

a way that will nourish my soul?3. What practices will enable me to live in joy

continually?

▶ When we face important decisions (like careerchange), we must pray, seek guidance, and exercisejudgment, wisdom, initiative, choice andresponsibility.

▶ God does not intend that guidance be a shortcut toescape making decisions and taking risks. Indeed,God wants us to develop good judgment, and there isno way to develop it apart from a process thatinvolves choices and risks.

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▶ God’s purpose in guidance is not to get us to performthe right actions. His purpose is to help us becomethe right kind of people.

▶ It only makes sense to ask God for guidance in thecontext of a life committed to seeking first theKingdom.

10. A Life of Freedom: The Practice of Secrecy▶ Some people live in bondage to what others think of

them. This is called “approval addiction”. If we findourselves often getting hurt by what others say aboutus, by people expressing other than glowing opinionsabut us, we probably have it.

▶ If we habitually compare ourselves with other people,if we find ourselves getting competitive in the mostordinary situations, we probably have it.

▶ If we live with a nagging sense that we aren’timportant enough or special enough, or we getenvious of another’s success, we probably have it.

▶ If we keep trying to impress important people, weprobably have it.

▶ If we are worried that someone might think ill of usshould he or she find out we are an approval addict,we probably have it.

▶ However, one of the fine arts of gracious living is theart of living freely with our critics. When we have thegrace to be free in the presence of those who judgeour lives and evaluate our actions, we have Christianfreedom.

▶ Imagine receiving criticism or judgment as “a verysmall thing”. Imagine being liberated from the needto impress anyone. Imagine our sense of esteem nolonger resting on whether someone notices howsmart, or attractive, or successful we are. Imaginebeing able to actually feel love toward someone whoexpresses disapproval of us.

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▶ Unfortunately, even though we can tell ourselvesothers aren’t thinking about us, that information alonedoes not bring true inner freedom. When our identityis wrapped up in whether or not we are perceived assuccessful, we are set up for the approval addiction.

▶ When you catch yourself comparing yourself withothers or thinking, “I could be happy if only I hadwhat they have,” then you know to withdraw fro awhile and listen for another voice.

▶ In fact, it is not another person’s compliment orapproval that makes us feel good; rather, it is ourbelief that there is validity to the compliment.

▶ People’s opinions are powerless until we validatethem. No one’s approval will affect us unless we grantit credibility and status. The same holds true fordisapproval.

▶ This explains why people can accomplishextraordinary things and still feel like a failure.

▶ Of course, being addicted to approval is not the sameas having a healthy appreciation for praise.Affirmation and encouragement are good things. Whata sad world it would be if artists, sports stars, orchildren never received any applaud orencouragement.

▶ Receiving praise gracefully, without becoming anaddict, requires a well-ordered heart. It is not alwayspossible to know when we have crossed the line toaddiction, but there are some indictors.

▶ Comparison: Approval addicts find themselvesmeasuring their accomplishments against those ofother people.

▶ Deception: If we are approval addicts, our concernfor what others think about us inevitably leads us toshade the truth.

▶ Resentment: When we crave approval too strongly,we inevitably come to resent the very person whoseapproval we seek.

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The practice of secrecy▶ Jesus spoke of doing good deed and making sure no

one finds out about them. The point is that truespiritual maturity means that we don’t feel the needto congratulate ourselves because we’ve gottensomething right.

▶ The habit to impress others is called “impressionmanagement.” This is trying to control the way othersthink of us.

11.An Undivided Life: The Practice of Reflection onScripture▶ The purity of hearth is to will one thing.▶ The alternative to duplicity and to multiplicity is a life

characterised by simplicity. Strive first for theKingdom of God and His righteousness.

▶ The aim is to have purity of heart.▶ We need to develop the practice of meditating on the

Word of God and the purpose of it is to have ourminds washed by the Word. Here are somesuggestions:

1. Ask God to meet in Scripture. Before you beginreading, take a moment to ask God to speak toyou.

2. Read the Bible in a repentant spirit. Read theBible with a readiness to surrender everything.Read it with a vulnerable hearth.

3. Meditate on a fairly brief passage or narrative.In reading for transformation we have to readslowly. The goal is not for us to get throughthe Scriptures. The goal is to get theScriptures through us. While knowledge is vitaland should be prized, it also poses somedangers. It often demolishes humility. Thephrase “know-it-all” is never used as acompliment.

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4. Take one though or verse with you through theday. What the mind repeats, it retains.

5. Allow this thought to become part of yourmemory.

12.A life with a well-ordered heart: Developing yourown rule of life▶ In conventional lifestyle people are after a balanced

life-style depicted in seven compartments:Recreational, Relational, Financial, Spiritual,Vocational, Physical, and Intellectual.

▶ However, this assumes that everyone starts on aneven playing field, which in real life that is not thecase, as people have various disadvantages in lifefrom family problems to critical illness. Ask a hungrylife in Somalia if he wants to achieve a balanced life.

▶ The balanced paradigm assumes that our problem isexternal – a disorder in our schedule or our job or ourseason of life. But the truly significant disorder isinternal.

▶ To have a well ordered-heart is to love1. the right thing2. to the right degree3. in the right way4. with the right kind of love.

▶ It is unlikely that we will deepen our relationship withGod in a casual or haphazard manner. There will be aneed for some intentional commitment and somereorganisation in our own lives. But there is nothingthat will enrich our lives more than a deeper andclearer perception of God’s presence in the routine ofdaily living.

▶ Finding a strategy for spiritual transformation willinvolve questions such as:

1. How and when will I pray?

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2. How will I handle money in a way that drawsme closer to God?

3. How can I approach work in a way that willhelp Christ to be formed in me?

4. How am I involved in Christina communitysuch as corporate worship, fellowship, andconfession?

5. How can I fill my daily tasks with a sense ofthe presence of God?

▶ All this means acting in the ways that Jesus had Hebeen in our position.

▶ Having an eye for beauty and appreciating everythinggood fortune. As Paul said, “Whatever you do, in wordor deed, do everything in the name of Jesus.”

13.A life of Endurance: The experience of suffering▶ Spiritual transformation will not happen without

perseverance and endurance.▶ Suffering and pain are will inevitably produce

endurance and thus spiritual growth.▶ So if we are going to be transformed, we must look at

how suffering benefits us, or at least how to respondto it.

▶ A test is a difficult experience through which aperson’s true values, commitments, and beliefs arerevealed.

▶ In accordance to the Old Testament testing revealssomething about endurance:

1. It is used only in reference to the people ofGod, never heathen nations.

2. It is applied only to people of faith, never tothe ungodly.

▶ Testing is reserved for those in a covenantrelationship with God. Even though it is painful.Testing is an act of love. Suffering serves to test ourfaith.

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▶ One of the most painful aspects of suffering is theloneliness of it.

▶ Life is filled with minitrials. When someone interruptsme, I can learn to graciously hold my tongue. Whenmy co-worker borrows something and doesn’t returnit immediately, I can learn patience. When I have aheadache, I can discover that it is possible to sufferand not tell everybody about it.