THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON...

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THE FIVE ASKERS© LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK© AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 [email protected] expertontheask

Transcript of THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON...

Page 1: THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask.

THE FIVE ASKERS© LAURA FREDRICKS,FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK©

AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERSAUGUST 13, 2015

[email protected]

expertontheask

Page 2: THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask.

Why is ASKing so Important?

Because it governs every aspect of our lives

Everything we Want, Need and Deserve!

Personally AND Professionally

ASKing is Empowerment!

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Most “ASKs” are in our Heads!

A person makes on average 150 ASKs a day:

Should I get up now or in 5 minutes?What should I wear to work?Should I skip or grab breakfast?Should I take the local roads/local train instead of the highway/express?This is all within first ½ hour of your day!

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What type of ASKer are you?

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3 Key Components

Which of the 5 ASKers are you and what characteristics of the 5 ASKers do you have?

Which kind of ASKer is your ASKing partner and do you compliment each other or cancel each other out?

Which kind of ASKer can your donor HEAR and feel most compatible??!!!

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ASKer #1

You are pleasant, deep thinker, and you are very strategic

You soften the conversation with your low tone of voice

You are very confident and you take your time to make sure everyone is comfortable

You will avoid confrontation and smooth things over quickly

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#1 – The Delicate Dodger

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You Might Look Like This!

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#1 – The Delicate Dodger WORDS:

“Kindly,” “May I,” “Of course,” “Only if it is ok with you,” “Sure,” “Perhaps,” “Let us think about this.”

BODY LANGUAGE:Wear neutral colors; have a pensive look; tend

to sit opposite the person being ASKed; Nod your head.

POSITIVES:In the moment; great listener; strongly believe

this is the best way to build consensus; take your time to get to YES.

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Refinements and PairingMay need to inject some energy to convey the importance and impact of your ASK

Be mindful of the time because your lay back style and methodical presence may take away time needed to explore all aspects of your ASK

IF you are ASKing a high profile, busy, business person may want to take someone who is opposite you keep the pace going

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ASKer #2ASKing is a challenge but you really want and need to do it.

You think of your own situation and reflect that giving “away” money is really hard.

Your approach is one of empathy which is how you feel when you ASK or you are ASKed.

People may not be able to give now so you hang with them and firmly believe they will give eventually.

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#2 – The Remorseful Requester

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#2 – The Remorseful Requester

WORDS:“Bother you,” “Totally understand,” “Sorry”

“I know exactly what you are saying/thinking/feeling” “Very difficult” BODY LANGUAGE:

Shoulders are forward; head tilt; eyes are centered but distant; presence eludes hesitation; sit diagonallyPOSITIVES:

Share this bonding moment; sensitivity is to be admired; care so much about the people you ASK

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Refinements and PairingRemember you are ASKing for your organization not yourself

You are not taking something away…you are giving them the opportunity to feel good

Your ASK will take a long time to close no matter who you ASK so practice with colleagues, board member, volunteer and little by little you will gain more confidence

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ASKer #3You are smiling and happy, and the person being ASKed knows you and loves you.

You are considered as close as family with the person you are ASKing.

The person being ASKed has all the information about your ASK.

You can spend minimal time actually ASKing because of your strong relationships.

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Page 16: THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask.

#3 – The Assuming Asker

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#3 – The Assuming Asker WORDS:

“Ok,” “This is great,” “Absolutely,” “Wonderful.” BODY LANGUAGE:

Happy as can be; wide smile; sparkling eyes; fluid hand movements; very relaxed; sitting as close as you can. POSITIVES:Love what you do; love who you do it with; there is no need to ASK it is just going to

happen or the ASK gets buried in conversation

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Refinements and PairingBelieve that people really do need direction and specifics for any ASK including do the ASK and give an amount

Separate just a bit from the closeness of the friendship/business relationship – “may be awkward” “I’m putting on my nonprofit hat now”

Tend to be very comfortable with people you know, not people you don’t know practice with people you know and then branch out to others

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ASKer #4

•The conversation is a bit one-sided.•You have a lot of information to share and it is important that you share all the details.•The person being ASKed seems engaged by listening to what you have to say.•You feel very comfortable if you do a majority of the talking so that the person being ASKed will have more than enough information.

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#4 The Domineering Demander

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#4 The Domineering Demander

They Don’t Always Look Like This:

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#4 The Domineering Demander

WORDS:“We are on it,” “We always,” “Everything is

on target,” “We just know,” “Don’t you agree?” “The time is now” BODY LANGUAGE:

Wide shoulders; eyes are focused; tone of voice is strong and powerful; sharp, neat dresser; sit directly opposite leaning inPOSITIVES:Convincing personality; You are determined and

focused; Many people are attracted to your intensity and eagerness

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Page 23: THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask.

Refinements and Pairing

I’m not sure this type can be refined…think of your bosses and CEO’s!!!

Take the time to practice listening skills just by increasing the amount of questions you ASK instead of downloading information

Definitely want to be paired with a non-domineering ASKer for balance

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ASKer #5

You have a good balance between speaking and listening.

You are extremely versed in all aspects of your ASK including what the person being ASKed may say.

You have a script that is well-rehearsed and you are comfortable doing the ASK with others.

You radiate trustworthiness.

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Page 25: THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask.

#5 – The Polished Proposer

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Page 26: THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask.

#5 – The Polished Proposer WORDS:

“Just fine,” “Terrific,” “Of course,” “Couldn’t be happier,” “Great news” “We will find out for you.” BODY LANGUAGE:

Lean into the conversation; shoulders are forward; sit across the table; pay particular attention to dress details, shoes, nails, hair, briefcase; eyes are compassionate POSITIVES:

You have done your homework and preparation is working for you!

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Refinements and PairingBe sure that as confident as you are you are also flexible and can stray from the script if the person you are ASKing needs more information

Make sure you do not come off as too stiff, too scripted, because you want some warmth and to be genuine in your ASK

Think ahead if person being ASKed needs a less formal approach and if a mere gesture of taking off your jacket, using less jewelry is would be better

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The 5 ASKers

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ExerciseWhat type of ASKer would be best for:

1) High profile donor?2) 30 year old up and coming

business entrepreneur? 3) Elderly couple considering a

bequest?4) Female self-made business owner?5) Sports fanatac?6) Retired active couple?

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WHAT KIND OF ASKER ARE YOU?

Tweet: @expertontheaskShare your thoughts and become

a Follower You could WIN “THE A$K!”

our answer

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Page 31: THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask.

The quality of your lifeis determined by the

quality of questions youASK yourself…

and others!

Twitter: expertontheask #justask

Thursday, April 20, 2023

Page 32: THE FIVE ASKERS © LAURA FREDRICKS, FOUNDER & CEO, THE ASK © AFP SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN/MADISON CHAPTERS AUGUST 13, 2015 laura@EXPERTonTHEASK.com expertontheask.

STAY IN TOUCH!

Twitter: expertontheask #justask

Thursday, April 20, 2023