The #1 Action You Must Take as a

Single MomHonorée Corder

There is one key action you must take in order to set yourself up for single

mom success.

BUT it’s not what you might think:

DON’T dive right into another relationship.

You DON’T need to pretend every is a-okay.

It’s NOT even learn how to get along with your ex, maybe not just yet.

What is the #1 action, you ask?

• Work on yourself

• Your self-confidence and self-esteem will inform and influence how happy you feel as you navigate through challenging initial years that follow, and long into the future.

Therapists have been quoted…

• Saying it takes two years to heal from a divorce or break-up involving kids, and be ready for a new love and relationship.

• You might think you’re special and need less time {I certainly did} because you didn’t love your spouse for the past few years, or because you’re more relieved.

• You would be wrong—you need every minute of those two years.

While you’re waiting:

• Be proactive about your life and yourself!

• Practicing fantastic self-care is a must.

• If your primary concern up to this point has been your kids, I understand. But you must take care of yourself first as an excellent post-divorce strategy.

Self-Care is Supreme

• Our society largely views self-care as selfish, indulgent, or sometimes even narcissistic.

• Yet self-care is anything but that!

• Taking good care of yourself not only makes your life more fulfilling, but it also contributes to your well-being.

As a single mom, self-care can make the difference between just getting through the day

and actually enjoying the day as it happens.

Care consciously and with intention

From years of personal experience, as well as executive coaching practice with many

hardworking people, I’ve learned that when we care for ourselves consciously and with

intention, we naturally begin to free ourselves to reach our highest potential and give our best

selves to the world.

Self-care has never been on your agenda?

Dealing with a divorce means there’s no time like the present to include simple yet profound

activities into your life that can make all of the difference to your mental, physical, and spiritual

health.

Three ways to incorporate self-care during and after divorce:

1. Discover when, where, why, and how you feel deprived and unhappy.

These are probably some much-neededthings in your life, such as physical touch,increased fulfillment, and FUN! From thereyou will gain a good idea on how best toapproach your self-care.

2. Identify your ideal routine.

Routine isn’t boring. Rather, it gives our lives stability, security, safety, and serenity. Routine is rejuvenating because it becomes part of who you are and something you can rely on thus reducing stress and increasing personal happiness.

Identify a routine that would matter most.

Ask yourself this question:

“What one activity could I put into place this month that would improve my life the most, that I could also do on a regular basis?”

Once identified, schedule that 1st appointment (like a massage, facial, or haircut), and place a recurring appointment on your calendar.

3. Create an “absolutely not list.”

Knowing what you don’t want to do is just as important as knowing what you do want!

This list represents the things that you refuse to tolerate in your life, because they don’t make you happy. Now that you’re single, you can begin to do the things that make you happy, while simultaneously refusing to do anything that makes you unhappy.

Make a list of your new self-care best practices, post it in a visible place, and look at it every day.

EVERY DAY.

Mine is on my refrigerator, and just looking at it reduces my stress and reminds me I always have something to look forward to.

Extreme self-care takes practice.

At first it might seem awkward to say no to something or someone, but what you’re really

doing is saying YES to yourself!

With practice, it will become more natural and automatic, and you’ll notice that you feel a whole lot more fulfilled and eventually you will become

genuinely happy.

You may also want to read:

When Mama’s Happy,

Everybody’s Happy AND

Check out my blog here.

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